If This Is Fate
by earthprincess4
Summary: Bella Swan is an abused child and has no hope of ever escaping her step father, James. She hides and pushes people away that get too close. Edward Cullen comes along and is determined to help her and keep her safe.
1. Prologue

**Prologue:**

**Two Beds and a Coffee Machine: Savage** **Garden**

And she takes another step  
Slowly she opens the door  
Check that he is sleeping  
Pick up all the broken glass  
And furniture on the floor  
Been up half the night screaming  
Now it's time to get away  
Pack up the kids in the car  
Another bruise to try and hide  
Another alibi to write

Another ditch in the road  
You keep moving  
Another stop sign  
You keep moving on  
And the years go by so fast  
Wonder how I ever made it through

And there are children to think of  
Babies asleep in the back seat  
Wonder how they'll ever make it  
Through this living nightmare  
But the mind is an amazing thing  
Full of candy dreams and new toys  
And another cheap hotel  
Two beds and a coffee machine  
But there are groceries to buy  
And she knows she'll have to go home

Another ditch in the road  
You keep moving  
Another stop sign  
You keep moving on  
And the years go by so fast  
Wonder how I ever made it through

Another bruise to try and hide  
Another alibi to write  
Another lonely highway in the black of night  
There's hope in the darkness  
I know you're gonna make it

Another ditch in the road  
Keep moving  
Another stop sign  
You keep moving on  
And the years go by so fast  
Silent fortress built to last  
Wonder how I ever made it

I was standing at the graveside surrounded by people I didn't know. Seth and Leah stood next to me clinging to my sides crying their eyes out. I didn't cry I had to be strong for Seth and Leah. I was all they had left. James sat in the chair facing the casket hunched over shaking from his emotional breakdown while people came to his sides to comfort him and wish him well. He was a great actor.

My mother's casket was lowered into the ground as we all watched. She left me, Leah, and Seth with this man that had killed her. Why did she make the choice to run? Why couldn't we have stayed put and accepted our fate? At least then she would still be alive and we wouldn't have to be standing here saying goodbye forever.

After the funeral we drove home with James in complete silence and once we were in the house it began. He slapped me and shoved me into the wall because I didn't cry at my mother's funeral. He told me that I was selfish and that I never loved her since I didn't cry. He continued to shove me and push me and tell me how worthless I was and that I better do as he says and never try to do anything like what my mother did.

That was the end of my existence as a normal teenager.


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1:**

**Better Days: ****Goo Goo**** Dolls**

And you ask me what I want this year  
And I try to make this kind and clear  
Just a chance that maybe we'll find better days  
Cuz I don't need boxes wrapped in strings  
And desire and love and empty things  
Just a chance that maybe we'll find better days

So take these words  
And sing out loud  
Cuz everyone is forgiven now  
Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again

And it's someplace simple where we could live  
And something only you can give  
And that's faith and trust and peace while we're alive  
And the one poor child that saved this world  
And there's 10 million more who probably could  
If we all just stopped and said a prayer for them

So take these words  
And sing out loud  
Cuz everyone is forgiven now  
Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again

I wish everyone was loved tonight  
And somehow stop this endless fight  
Just a chance that maybe we'll find better days

So take these words  
And sing out loud  
Cuz everyone is forgiven now  
Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again  
Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again

**BPOV**

_It was pitch black and I couldn't move. My hands and feet were tied, my mouth was gagged, eyes were covered, and I felt like my whole body was on fire. I knew where I was though. I knew I was going to die, I knew it was over. I heard footsteps coming down the stairs. He was coming to finish me off. But it wasn't his voice that I heard when he spoke._

"_Bella, it's okay now, I'm here to get you out. You're going to be okay," The voice said. _

At 5 am just at the beginning of October my alarm went off once again bringing me out of my dream. I couldn't help but giggle at the dream I just had. I very rarely dreamed at all, but this one was bizarre. I crawled out of bed once again to start my day in this monotonous life of cleaning, cooking, caring for my family and also trying to finish my last year of high school. I guess you could say I lived a Cinderella life but I didn't have an evil stepmother; I had an evil stepfather and my stepsister and half brother were not evil. They were my life and I did everything I could to protect them from James. There was also no Prince Charming to come and rescue me, like in that dream I just had.

As I looked in the mirror in the bathroom and rubbed the sleep out of my eyes I inspected the bruises on my arms and on my back. Over the years I got really good at covering up the bruises and cuts that were bestowed upon me by my stepfather. My mother Renee got pregnant with me right out of high school and my real father took off and joined the military. My mother never heard from him again. The only thing I knew about him was his name; Charlie and he was the rebel of the school, that's why mom fell for him. My mom was always attracted to the bad boys and there were plenty of them through the years, but none of them ever stuck around. It was just her and I until she met James, when I was 10. James was the new police chief of our small town of Forks Washington. He was also a single father of a 5 year old daughter. His previous wife who was Leah's mother, Victoria supposedly died in a car accident while they lived in Arizona but I have my doubts on that now. My mom was smitten by him instantly and they began dating immediately, he seemed like such a nice guy and my mom had never been so happy. They married just a few short months after meeting and then announced that they were expecting a baby. I was thrilled to be a big sister, not only to my new stepsister Leah, but to the new baby on the way. That was until the day I saw James hit my mom across the face for not having dinner ready by the time he got home. He didn't care that my mom had been puking all day from the morning sickness. James changed after they were married, he didn't let my mom go anywhere alone, she was not allowed to have friends or talk to anyone; he hit her and pushed her all the time. I figured after she died 3 years ago, I had become his new target. Thankfully, he very rarely ever hit Leah or Seth; who my mom gave birth to almost a month early because James had shoved her and she fell, which caused her to go into preterm labor. Most the time, I would try to take the blame for them, just so they wouldn't get hurt. I always wondered if I was ever to leave, would Leah become his new target, or would it be Seth. But there was no possible way to get away from James, accept in death.

After my shower I pulled on a long sleeve, light blue sweater, a pair of blue jeans, and pulled my hair up into a ponytail. Then I headed down stairs to make breakfast and lunches before James got up.

"I left some grocery money on the counter" James said gruffly at the table, while we all sat to eat our breakfast. "And this time, only buy what we need. Don't think I didn't look at the receipt from last time and see the M&M's on it."

"They were for Seth and Leah," I said quietly still looking down. "I was able to save a little on some things that were on sale, it was just a special treat for them. They don't get things like that very often.

James threw his fork down on his plate which made eggs splatter on Leah. "Are you trying to say I don't provide for my kids?" We all jumped and held our breath.

"No, not at all James, I only wanted to do something nice for them," I was trying to speak clearly without sounding afraid but I could hear the tremor in my voice and I'm sure he did too. "I'm sorry it won't happen again."

"It better not, I don't work all day so you can rot my kids' teeth," he stood from his chair, walked over to me and slapped me across the face and my head fell to the side. I tried not to make a sound. He grabbed a handful of my hair to pull my head back up to look at him.

I tried my hardest to hold back the tears and I knew Seth and Leah were doing the same. James hated it when we cried and I knew if he saw tears from any of us it would get worse. "Don't forget who is in charge, Bella. I expect you to do as you are told. I don't want to have to do this, but you leave me no other option when you misbehave."

"I'm sorry James, it won't happen again," I struggled to say. He released my hair with a yank and stormed off towards the living room. Once I heard the slam of the front door and I knew James was gone until later tonight; I let one single tear fall down my cheek, but then I heard the whimpers of my 13 year old sister and 8 year old brother. I pushed back my own pain and quickly went to their side to comfort them.

"It's okay, you don't need to cry," I said falling to my knees to hug them both close.

"If we hadn't have asked for the M&M's you wouldn't have been hit." Leah said through her tears.

"Leah, you know it has nothing to do with the M&M's, he would have found some reason to hit me regardless. I wasn't hurt; I'm used to it." I was trying to be brave for them so they wouldn't be sad, but all I really wanted to do was run to my room and cry from the sting that was prickling all over the side of my face.

"Someday I'm going to stand up to him and tell him to stop hurting you," Seth said confidently.

I pulled away from my little brother to look at him sternly. "Seth you will not do anything of the sort, he would just get mad at you for defying him."

"I don't care, he shouldn't hit you Bella, it's not right," Seth said back with determination.

"It might not be right but it's what we have to live with. Now no more tears, we need to finish getting ready for school." I pushed away the pain I was feeling and urged them to let it go.

I walked Seth and Leah to school, like I did every morning before heading to the high school alone. When we arrived at the middle school, Seth ran off to the doors but Leah lingered behind.

"Bella, are you ever going to tell anyone what's happening to you, to us?" Leah asked.

"Leah, I can't, if anyone knew, it would just get worse. I don't want him to decide to start hitting you and Seth too." Leah and I had this argument almost daily. She was a very strong willed child with an attitude and I think she saw me as weak because I didn't do anything to stop James. But what could I do?

"Maybe there's someone who could help us, like a social worker or counselor," Leah said with wide eyes.

"You know if we went to child services and told them what is happening we would be taken away and separated into foster homes, until he was able to convince them that it's all a misunderstanding and we would have to go back. Then, he would beat us all or worse. There isn't anything we can do right now, except try to stay out of his way and keep him happy. Now go on, you're going to be late for class." James had told us horror stories of what happens in foster homes and where we would end up if we were ever to tell anyone what happened. So, there was no way I was going to the police or a social worker.

"I want us to get out of there Bella, so does Seth. I don't want to live like this anymore, I'm going to find a way out, for all of us, if you won't," Leah said with tears filling her eyes.

"Leah, you don't need to worry about this right now, just get to class, we can discuss it later." I gave her a big hug before she walked off to class.

I watched Leah storm off into the building to make sure she didn't turn back around, and then I finished the walk to the Forks high school. I worried about Leah, she had a strong spirit and I feared that one of these days, she was going to snap and get us all in trouble. James would not stand by and let her fight back, if she ever felt the need to do so. It wouldn't matter if she was his biological daughter or not.

Once I got to my locker, I heard a familiar high pitched voice yelling my name from a distance. That would be Alice, my one and only friend, she was tiny, with black spiky hair but she was feisty and didn't let her stature hold her back. For some reason, she sounded completely elated and overjoyed running through the crowds in the hall. I could only guess what she was so excited about, the homecoming dance. She had been dating Jasper, a guy from the football team, for about a month now and she had been overdoing this dance preparation. Not only was she the head of the dance committee, with her fashionable and imaginative personality, but she was going overboard with trying to find the perfect dress. She has bought 3 dresses already and couldn't decide which one to wear. I really didn't think Jasper was going to care much what dress she had on, but she wanted the night to be perfect. I can't imagine what she will be like when Prom comes along, if she is acting like this about homecoming.

"Guess what," she squealed as she stopped seconds from plowing into me.

"Um, let me think, you found the perfect dress?" I asked rolling my eyes at her in a playful manner.

"Actually, I think I did and I love it, its black and form fitting with cutouts that show off a little skin on my back. But that isn't what I wanted you to guess."

"Then I have no idea." I said, shaking my head.

She squealed with excitement once again and began jumping up and down. "Edward Cullen and Jessica Stanley just broke up."

"So, what's the big deal? Don't they break up at least once a week?" I didn't understand why she was so excited about this news. Edward was the star football quarterback and every girl's fantasy, but he had been attached to Jessica since freshman year. Their relationship was never that strong considering they broke up and got back together constantly, most of the school considered their relationship more of just a show, Edward being the star quarterback and Jessica being the head cheerleader. It was cliché, I know, but that's what it was.

"Yes, but this time Jasper said it's for good. He doesn't want to get back with her this time and he's discussing possible dates for homecoming with Jasper. Every girl in the school that doesn't have a date is already after him. I put in a good word for you and Jasper said he'd mention you." Alice said with enthusiasm.

"Alice, what did you do?" Why would she tell Jasper to mention me as a possible replacement for Jessica? He probably doesn't know who I am anyway. I was just a plain girl that no one paid attention to, I blended into the crowd, I stayed out of the way of others, and I tried to avoid contact with anyone as much as I could, aside from Alice. The more people I had connections with, the harder it was to hide my home life from.

"Oh, come on, Bella, you can't tell me you wouldn't want to go to the dance with Edward if he asked you," Alice said with a raised eyebrow. "I know you've had a crush on him since middle school."

"I admit, I had a crush on him, just like every other girl he has ever come in contact with, but then I saw how arrogant and conceited he was and quickly changed my mind," I said truthfully. "I don't like Edward Cullen," I lied. "And even if he did ask me to the dance, I wouldn't go." He was arrogant, but in all honesty, if he did ask me, and it was remotely possible for me to go, I would.

"Bella, you don't ever do anything fun. You never go to dances, or school functions. We don't even spend time together outside of school. This is senior year, our last chance to have fun, so lighten up and live a little," she said trying to convince me.

"I can't Alice." I wished there was a way to explain this to her, but there wasn't.

"Whatever," she said defensively. "It was just an idea, since I'm going with Jasper, I thought it would be kind of cool if my best friend and his best friend doubled with us, but if you don't want to go, then I'm not going to pressure you into it."

I would have loved to go with him but there was no way I could. James would never allow it and I wasn't going to attempt to ask him.

**EPOV**

"Dude, are you sure you're going to be okay?" Jasper asked me for the hundredth time.

"Jazz, I said I was fine, so what if Jessica wants to go to the dance with the new guy Mike? I really couldn't care less. I'm so done with all her bullshit anyway. " I was trying to be as convincing as possible.

"Well you still plan to go to the dance right? I mean you have to, we can't pull this off one guy short." The entire football team was planning to do a skit at the dance that no one knew about and we had been preparing for it for weeks now.

"Yeah, I'll be there." I answered in an indifferent tone. I really didn't want to go at this point but I had to be there for my team. We headed to Spanish class and every time I would look up some girl would be handing me a folded up piece of paper with her number on it. What is with these chicks? I don't even know half of them. I just broke up with Jess and they were already thinking that I was going to be looking for someone new? How pathetic. I smiled politely at each girl who slipped me their phone number and shoved the papers into my pocket. I'd have to throw all of those away once I got home.

Jazz and I took our seats in the back of the room just as the bell rang. Mr. Gonzalez told us to practice saying sentences with a partner and to work on pronunciation. But Jazz and I never did that shit. I'm not planning to need Spanish any time soon so I don't need to know how to enunciate correctly. As long as I passed the written stuff then that was fine. I had the highest GPA in the school regardless, so no one ever cared what I did. My parent's Carlisle and Esme were a doctor and a school teacher so growing up they made sure my education came first. Not only that but I was the school president and captain of the football team so my life was pretty much set.

"So, Jazz I need a date to homecoming I can't go alone, got any ideas?"

"You were just handed at least a half a dozen number's, call one of them up."

"They all looked like fucking freshman and I am not going to the dance with a freshman. I have a reputation to keep you know? I need someone that will make Jessica look like a damn fool."

"You're not trying to get her back are you?" Jasper gave me the dirtiest look across the table.

"God no, I just want someone that will make her jealous." I really didn't want to get back with Jessica after she dumped me for Mike, the new kid who looked like he was still in middle school. I just wanted her to realize how stupid she was so I could feel vindicated in it all.

"Well I do have one girl in mind, actually Alice mentioned her. Do you know who Bella Swan is?"

"Bella," I looked away for a moment trying to remember who Bella was. "You mean Isabella, the chief's daughter?"

"She goes by Bella, she's Alice's best friend and she doesn't have a date yet. Alice sort of made me promise you would take her. I told her I couldn't promise that but I would at least mention it. She isn't horrible looking and Alice will dress her up like a little doll and make all the girls jealous. She's good at that." Jasper had a smile on his face when he mentioned Alice.

"Yeah, I hadn't noticed, Mr. GQ." I said with a laugh. Jasper had recently changed from wearing ripped up jeans and a wrinkled t-shirt to dressing like he just came off a modeling shoot thanks to Alice. He had told me that she refused to be seen with someone who didn't know how to dress correctly, so she took it upon herself to start shopping for him. He didn't mind though, as long as she gave him what he wanted, she could dress him up any way she wanted to.

"Fuck you."

"I'll leave that to Alice." I smirked.

"Well at least I'm getting some, when's the last time Jessica put out?"

"So about this girl," I quickly changed the subject, "why doesn't she have a date yet? I've seen her around she isn't ugly, what's the deal?"

"I think it's more that she's shy. Any guy that has ever shown her any interest she pushes away. Alice says it's hard to get to know her at first."

"Will she even go then?" I asked.

"If Alice has anything to say about it, she will. And Alice will make sure she understands it's just a bunch of friends hanging out.

"Well she'll work then; I don't want whoever I take to think it's anything more than a dance." She _was_ perfect, not gorgeous but pretty enough, not clingy, she won't have any expectations after the dance is over and then we can go our separate ways but still be friends.

"So are you going to ask her?" Jazz asked after first period was over.

"Yeah probably, you'll be sitting with her and Alice at lunch won't you?"

"I always do."

"I think I'll join you today instead of sitting with the guys."

~*~

As I entered the cafeteria at lunch my scene was set up perfectly, Bella was sitting across from Jasper and Alice with an empty seat next to her. I grabbed a tray of food and walked over and plopped myself in the chair next to her.

"Do you mind if I sit with you guys?" I asked trying to be polite.

"No, go ahead." Jasper replied with a knowing smile.

Bella was reading a book that was placed in her lap and didn't look up at me once. This was odd, usually girls would be chatting my ear off by now. "You must be Bella. I'm Edward." I hoped that she would at least respond to that.

"I know who you are." She looked up from her book just briefly to respond.

"Right," fuck, of course she knows who I am.

I looked around the cafeteria and noticed that a lot of eyes were on us. The guys from the football team I usually sat with were giving me confused looks, Jessica's group of friends were glaring me down, a lot of girls some that had slipped me their phone numbers earlier were looking at Bella like they were ready to attack her. These girls must have some sort of radar and know what was going on_. _Okay what do I do to get her attention? Stupid stuff that impresses most girls was not going to work on her. I could just ask her but I'm thinking she would say no right away. I needed to talk to her and get her to trust me first. Jasper and Alice could help with this. When I looked up at them I noticed they were kissing and about 2 seconds from having sex right here in front of everyone.

"God you two, get a fucking room." I blurted out. Bella looked up at me with shock on her face and followed my eyes to Jasper and Bella. When she looked back at me with a smirk on her face I made sure our eyes connected.

"They do this every day." She said.

Finally she speaks. "Well I guess you're the smart one to bring a book along for a distraction." I smiled back at her. "Maybe you and I should go find somewhere else to sit and give them some privacy."

"I don't think so." She quickly responded as I watched her drop her head back to her book and in the corner of my eye I could see Jasper and Alice release their kiss so I turned my attention back to them.

"So Edward, have you found someone to go to the dance with?" Alice asked.

"Still working on it, but the girl I want to ask doesn't seem that interested."

"I'm sure she is you just need to give her time." Alice gave me a knowing smile. Obviously Jasper and Alice were in on this little plan. Well, if anyone knew what was going on in Bella's head, it would be Alice. So, I just need to give her time, that's what Alice suggested. The only problem is there isn't time, the dance is this weekend. I need a new plan.


	3. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2:**

**Broken: Lifehouse**

The broken clock is a comfort, it helps me sleep tonight

Maybe it can stop tomorrow from stealing all my time

And I am here still waiting though I still have my doubts

I am damaged at best, like you've already figured out

I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing

With a broken heart that's still beating

In the pain there is healing

In your name I find meaning

The broken locks were a warning you got inside my head

I tried my best to be guarded; I'm an open book instead

And I still see your reflection inside of my eyes

That are looking for purpose, they're still looking for life

I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing

With a broken heart that's still beating

In the pain (In the pain) there's the healing

In your name (In your name) I find meaning

So I'm holdin' on, (I'm still holdin')

I'm holdin' on, (I'm still holdin')

I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin')

I'm barely holdin' on to you

I'm hanging on another day

Just to see what you will throw my way

And I'm hanging on to the words you say

You said that I would, would be ok

The broken lights on the freeway left me here alone

I may have lost my way now, haven't forgotten my way home

I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing

With a broken heart that's still beating

In the pain (In the pain) there is healing

In your name (In your name) I find meaning

So I'm holdin' on, (I'm still holdin)

I'm holdin' on, (I'm still holdin')

I'm holdin' on, (I'm still holdin')

I'm barely holdin' on to you

I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin')

I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin')

I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin')

I'm barely holdin' on to you

**BPOV**

I was so mad at Alice right then. Here she was making out with Jasper, forcing me to sit next to Edward and I knew what her plan was. She wanted me and Edward to get close so we would go to the dance with her and Jasper. I don't know why she was pushing this so much, she knows I can't dance and she knows I can't stand Edward. Don't get me wrong he's gorgeous, tall, built, his hair was a bronze color that was a mess but worked for him, his eyes were a piercing green, and his smile was to die for, but he's arrogant and from what I heard he was abusive to Jessica. That's just what I need, to be beat by two men.

"I already have my dress picked out you are going to love it Jasper." Alice said as she fed him a grape and he took it into his mouth along with her finger.

This is really disgusting to watch, I kept looking at the clock willing the bell to ring so I could get away from all of them. I tried to focus on the book in my lap but I could feel all eyes in the cafeteria including Edward's on me. I hated this. Tomorrow if Alice wants to sit with them again I'm sitting somewhere else alone.

"So are you ready for the game this weekend? Coach is really pushing us to win this one. They're one of the hardest teams to beat." Thankfully Jasper changed the subject and distracted Edward with football talk. I kept my eyes on my book half listening to them the rest of lunch but I never joined into the conversations. I could feel all 3 of them looking over at me hoping I would. I just couldn't, it's not that I didn't like them or want to be polite and talk with them it's just that the closer I got to people the harder it was to hide my life from them. Alice knew that my home life was not perfect but she didn't know the extent of what really went on and she never asked. That's why I remained friends with her. When the bell rang I stood up too fast and being the clumsy girl that I am I tripped over the back chair leg and Edward caught me as I began to fall.

"Are you alright?" He asked looking into my eyes with a half smile and a raised eyebrow.

I wiggled free from his arms and steadied myself on the floor. "I'm fine, I just tripped." I walked away as fast as I could. I felt completely mortified; he must think I'm really stupid now. I didn't know why I cared what he thought of me, I've never cared what anyone thought of me. Once I got into my classroom I sighed heavily and laid my head down on the desk waiting for the class to start. Not ten minutes into the class I get a note from the office stating there was an emergency at home and I needed to leave right away. My heart skipped not knowing what this meant. Was it Leah? Did she skip school and James caught her? Did I forget to do something at home and James is mad now? I couldn't figure it out, all I knew, is I had to get home, now. I ran down the hall and out the doors to the outside. Once I stepped out into the cool air, forgetting to grab my coat from my locker before I left, I felt a hand grab my arm and swing me towards the wall.

I instantly closed my eyes and slid down the wall pulling my knees to my chest and covering my head with my arms, taking a defensive position to whatever abuse was coming. Obviously James was too mad to wait until I got home.

"Bella, are you okay?" A familiar voice that was not James' ringed in my head.

I slowly opened my eyes to see Edward kneeling down next to me with a puzzled look on his face and his hand hovering over me too afraid to touch me I was sure.

"I'm fine," I timidly said uncurling myself off the ground. He reached out a hand to help me up and I reluctantly took it.

"What was that about?" He asked looking more terrified then I did. He began running his hands through his hair and stepping away from me.

"It was nothing; you just startled me." If I didn't already feel mortified about what happened at lunch then I would at this point. Now I was completely humiliated. "I have to go." I tried to push past him but he stood in front of me not allowing me to pass.

"Let me take you to get something to eat, maybe you're feeling weak."

"I can't, there's some sort of emergency at home." I shook my head and tried unsuccessfully to step around him once again.

"I know I sent the pass to get you out of class."

I looked into his eyes with shock and confusion. "You sent it?"

"Well it was either that or I call you over the intercom, I thought a note was a better option." He had a smirk on his face that made me a little mad.

I huffed and stomped back towards the door to the school.

"Where are you going?" He asked.

I turned around to face him with my hand on the door handle ready to go back in. "If there really isn't any emergency then I'm going back to class."

"You can't do that, if you do then not only do you get in trouble but I will too."

"Well I don't think I'll get in as much trouble as you will, considering I went back."

"Bella," he reached out and grabbed my hand. "Please, just spend an hour with me then I'll bring you back to school and never talk to you again if that's what you want."

I sighed looking back at him as my shoulders slumped. I could feel myself give in to his touch.

"Come on, please? You didn't eat anything at lunch let's go get something to eat and then I'll bring you back here or home or wherever it is you want me to take you."

"Fine, one hour." I surrendered to his pleas with a huff and followed him to his car. I did pull my hand free from his and he seemed irritated at that but he didn't say anything. When we got to his silver Volvo in the parking lot he came over and opened the passenger door for me. Well I guess he isn't so bad at least he has some manners.

"So where too?" He asked starting up the car.

"I don't care." I was still a little irritated that he tricked me into this.

"Alright, well if you don't care then I think I'll drive into Port Angeles and we can go to a little Italian restaurant there that I love."

"Port Angeles, are you crazy, that's an hour away?" I was shouting at him now and all he did was look over at me and smile.

"I was kidding Bella." He started laughing at my reaction so I just crossed my arms and sunk into the seat to look out the window. "Why don't we just go to the taco stand around the corner, then I'll take you to one of my favorite spots and we can talk?"

I didn't respond and he never pressured me for one. He just drove to the drive thru.

"What would you like?" He asked.

"I'm really not that hungry." I replied dryly.

"You didn't eat anything at lunch, now pick something or I'll pick for you. "

I glared over at him at the tone in his voice and at how he was ordering me around. I get enough of that at home I don't need it at school too. "I'll just have a taco."

Edward ordered the food and drove around to the window to pay for it then we drove a few miles up the highway and pulled onto a side road that was more of just a trail. Once we stopped at a clearing in the trees I looked up and in the distance there were mountains with the tips covered with the first signs of snow and a small waterfall spilling down from the top.

"Wow, this is beautiful," I said in amazement. I'd never seen anything like this before but then again I didn't get out much either. There were probably many places around Forks just like this that I had never seen and probably never would.

"I thought you might like it, this is one of my favorite places to come when I need to think." Edward, handing me a taco then began devouring his own food as fast as he could. I picked at the taco since I really wasn't that hungry. Plus the nervousness I felt in my stomach was not a good combination with spicy taco meat.

"So what did you want to talk about?" I dared glancing over in his direction.

"I guess I felt like you didn't like me much at lunch and I was curious why. Did I say something to offend you?" He gave me a very intent look that scared me.

"No."

"Was it something I did?"

"No."

"Then you just genuinely don't like me, is that it?"

"No, it's just that I don't trust you." I finally offered an explanation.

"You don't trust me," he repeated. "Is it because of the rumor that I hit Jessica?"

I looked over at him but didn't respond. He stared at me waiting for me to say something or to read my expression. I looked back down at the taco in my lap trying to hide my face behind my hair and sighed.

"You know that wasn't true right? I never hit her, not once. We fought a lot but I never hurt her."

"I don't know you well enough to be able to believe that." I kept my head down too afraid to meet his eyes.

"Then give me a chance to prove that I'm not as bad a guy as some people have made me out to be. Go to the homecoming dance with me."

"I can't." I quickly said, hoping he would accept that. But this is Edward Cullen he doesn't take no for an answer.

"Why? I'm not a monster that's going to hurt you Bella. I just want you to go to a dance with me, so unless you can give me a good reason why then I'm not accepting your 'I can't'."

"Edward, it's complicated and I wish I could tell you but I can't. If I could go I would. I'm sorry." I finally met his eyes and mustered up all the courage I had to tell him no.

"You still didn't give me a good enough answer." Of course he's stubborn and won't accept that either.

"Edward, please don't do this." My head fell into my hands and I closed my eyes losing all the courage I had built up.

"Bella, I really want to go with you. There's no one else I'd rather go with."

How do I get out of this? I can't tell him the real reason.

"Just give me a good reason why and I'll leave you alone."

I took a deep breath trying to gain my courage again and looked up at him.

"If you must know all the reasons why fine," I began. "First of all I have to take care of my brother and sister, second of all I don't have anything to wear, third I can't dance. You saw me today I can't even stand up without tripping, and most importantly my father would never let me go." I tried to sound final and matter-of-factly.

"Alright, well let me see here, as far as I'm aware your sister is 13 and old enough to take care of your brother if your dad isn't there with them, if you don't have anything to wear I would gladly give you some money so you could go buy yourself a dress, as for not being able to dance I can help you with that. Besides I kind of like it that you're clumsy and fall into my arms," he grinned from ear to ear with that comment. "And as for your dad I'm sure I can convince him that I'm a stand up guy that only wants to take his little girl to a school dance and that I will abide by all the rules and…"

"NO!" I swung my head to face him with fear on my face and my breathing quickened. "You can't talk to him about this, please promise you won't."

He looked back at me with his eyebrows pinched together, and confusion written all over his face.

"Look, Bella I know he's the police chief and he can be intimidating but I think I can handle it. Besides, he likes my father and I'm sure that would give me extra points to get on his good side."

"Edward please you have to promise me that you won't talk to him. I know this might sound strange but just promise me." I looked into his eyes pleading with him. I could feel the tears stinging my eyes. If Edward went to James and mentioned my name at all I would be beat so hard by him that he might have to cover up my murder also and I'm sure that Edward would be taking the fall so to protect not only myself, Leah and Seth, I had to protect Edward now, too. I might not care much for him but I didn't want him or his family to suffer because of me.

"Can you tell me why you don't want me to talk to him?" His face changed to concern.

"No, you just can't, please if you care about me at all, which I highly doubt is much, you won't ever talk to him about this."

He reached over and placed his hand on top of mine rubbing it lightly with his thumb. Clearly he was seeing my body shaking from fear and he was trying to comfort me, which was working. My hurried breaths were subsiding and my eyes were returning to normal again.

"If it's this upsetting to you, then I promise I won't ever mention any of this to him. And what gives you the idea I don't care about you?" He asked, the crooked smile returning to him face.

"I'm not stupid Edward, this whole thing of taking me to the homecoming dance is just to make Jessica jealous so she'll come crawling back to you."

"Well to inform you, O-brilliant, one on my true intentions, yes I do want Jessica to see me with a new gorgeous girl on my arm, and I'm still hoping that is you," he said with a grin a raised eyebrow. "But it's not to get her back, I'm done with her. Jasper mentioned you when I was asking him for advice on whom to take to the dance and you were the only girl that I even considered taking."

He did know how to lay on the charm. How do I explain to him that I can't? I felt the tears welling up in my eyes once again.

"Hey," Edward released my hand and reached up to pull my chin up so I would look directly into his eyes then he brushed his thumb across my cheek to wipe the tears that had escaped. When I looked up into his eyes for once I saw a softer caring face that I had never seen before on him. How could he look so good and still be a decent guy? "I do care about you Bella, I know we don't know each other well and I'm hoping to change that, but I do care. And I think a good way for us to get to know each other better is if we go to the dance. I mean the way Jasper and Alice were acting today I think we're kind of destined to get to know each other whether we like it or not. It would be nice to have someone to talk to when they start making out like that."

I couldn't help but laugh at the memory of Alice and Jasper in the lunch room today and I wasn't surprised that Edward was laughing with me.

"So what do you say, will you go to the dance with me?"

I took a deep breath and released it. How do I answer this? I wanted to go with him, I wanted to get to know him better, he was turning out to be a better guy then I thought he was. But I can't go. I thought for a minute all the while feeling his thumb still rubbing my hand and feeling his eyes on my face waiting for my answer.

"Can I think about and get back to you?" It was the only thing I could think of to say. He wasn't taking no for an answer and I couldn't say yes so the only thing I could do was try and drag it out.

He smiled at me with his crooked grin. "Sure. But remember the dance is this weekend so don't wait too long to say yes."

"You are a little too over confident, you know that?" I shoved him away playfully and we laughed together. Where did that come from? Why was I so comfortable with him now when only a few minutes ago I was terrified?

"Well Bella, it looks like my hour is up, where to?" He asked starting up the car.

"Back to school I guess. I can still go to last period."

He pulled out and headed back towards the school. I still didn't trust Edward, in the back of my head I knew he was using me to get back at Jessica but the teenager side of me said who cares; just enjoy it while it lasts. And then the practical side said push him away so he doesn't end up getting hurt in the process.

After he parked the car he came around to my side and once again opened the door for me. "By the way, how did you get me out of class?" I inquired.

He looked over at me with that familiar smirk and put his arm around my shoulders as we started walking back to the building. "I have my connections."

Edward walked me to my last class and every person in the school was staring at us, I didn't like that but Edward seemed to love it, he's used to people staring at him. Once we arrived at the door of my class he grabbed my arm and pulled me aside before I entered through the door. I looked up at him wondering what he was doing.

"I really would like to take you to that Italian restaurant I mentioned earlier. Maybe we could go there before the dance?" He smiled down at me and I couldn't help but smile back. He had this power over me that made me weak at the knees. I think I probably would have given him anything he wanted with just that smile.

"I haven't even said yes yet." Yet, why did I say yet?

"But you will." He reached up and pushed a strand of hair that had come loose from my hair tie, behind my ear.

"I have to go." I pulled away from his hand in my hair and walked into the classroom. I hated this; I was really starting to like him. When I took my seat I noticed Jessica glaring over at me from her seat. Great, I forgot I had this class with her. Edward probably knew though and that's why he did that. He wanted her to see so she would be jealous. I knew he was using me to get back at her. I shouldn't have gone with him last period.

**EPOV**

During last period I couldn't get over how Bella reacted when I mentioned talking to her dad. She panicked and started shaking uncontrollably. Why did she get like that about her dad? He seemed like a really nice guy and my father had nothing but great things to say about him. They even spent some time together fishing. Carlisle wasn't much of a fisherman but he was up for trying something new so he went with a group of local men to try it out, James being one of them, and he took my father under his wing in a sense to show him the ropes. Well whatever it is she didn't want to tell me about it so I'm not going to pressure her.

She was going to say yes though, I'm sure of that. She probably needs to talk to Alice and make arrangements then she would give me her answer. I couldn't get over how beautiful she was either, why didn't I ever notice her before? She had beautiful, long, brown hair with a little curl in it, and big brown eyes that you could get lost in. I could see myself spending a lot of time with this girl.

Great, Edward stop you just got out of relationship and now you want to start another one with Bella? What happened to being single for a while? But I can't do that to Bella, she's already gone through enough in her life with her mom dying and how she has pretty much raised her brother and sister; she didn't need me messing it up too. Maybe I should call this off. I could just tell her that I changed my mind and didn't want to go to the dance after all. No I can't do that either, she would be so hurt by it. If she denies me again then I'll accept it and hopefully we can just be friends nothing more. I liked Bella and I could see us being good friends but I really didn't want any more then that with anyone. I hope she doesn't get the wrong idea; I just want to be her friend that's all.

Maybe I could offer her a ride home after school then I could talk to her more and make it clear that I only wanted to be friends.

After class I went to my locker to gather up my stuff then I was going to go find Bella. I had this uncontrollable need to be near her and I didn't know why. I really wanted to uncover the panic attack she had when I mentioned her dad, I wanted to know why she flinched every time I touched her, I wanted to know why she wasn't the bubbly happy girl she was in grade school, I wanted to know what really happened with her mother and not just the rumors, I wanted to know about her family, I wanted to know everything. The harder I tried to pretend I didn't have an instant connection to this girl the harder my mind told me differently.

"Hey Edward," Jasper said coming up behind me.

"Hi." I responded with a distance in my voice.

"So I saw you walking to last period with Bella, what was that about?" Jasper asked with a sly smile on his face.

"I got her out of class and we took off to talk. Something happened when we were talking."

"Oh Edward you didn't?" He looked at me with bulging eyes.

"Didn't what?" I yanked my arm back.

"You didn't have sex with her already did you?"

"God, Jazz, no. You know I'm not like that. I'm not you." I was thoroughly irritated with him for even mentioning something so ridiculous. I barely knew the girl and it wasn't my style to sleep with anyone who walked my way.

"Sorry, you just seem to be focusing on something really important and I can't figure out why. So what happened that has you so far gone?"

"I mentioned talking to her dad about the dance and she panicked. She started begging me not to and she was shaking, she was even crying."

"Why did she do that?"

"I don't know, that's what I'm trying to figure out. It was weird; I didn't know what to do or how to react to her. I just held her hand and tried to comfort her and eventually she calmed down. I'm kind of worried about her."

"Edward, please don't tell me you're falling for this girl already. What happened to having some fun and not getting involved with anyone for a while?"

"I'm not falling for her. I'm just curious what's going on."

"Well the best advice I can give to you is don't get involved, after what happened with her mom I can't imagine that she isn't screwed up a little. Go to the dance with her, have fun and then let her go."

"You're probably right." I said quickly before rushing off. "I'll talk to you later?"

"Where are you going, we have practice?"

"I have some things to do. I'll be back in time for practice."

I took off running towards my car knowing that by now she was probably walking towards the middle school and if I hurried I could catch her. I just wanted to be sure she was okay. To be sure that what happened earlier wasn't still affecting her. The rain was coming down hard so I had trouble spotting her through the groups of kids but then I spotted her walking by herself with the hood of her coat over her head. I rolled down the window and the rush of cold air that came in made my teeth chatter. I didn't know how she handled walking through this.

"Bella," I yelled. She turned around with a surprised look on her face. "Do you want a ride?"

She walked over to me still holding her head down to prevent the rain getting on her face. "What are you doing?"

"I'm offering you a ride, so you don't have to walk in the rain."

"I can't, I need to get my brother and sister."

"I know, we can go pick them up also. Come on, it's got to be better then walking in the rain. Get in."

"Alright, but I have to go home right away."

"I can do that."

She walked over to the passenger side and got in. I turned up the heat in the car for her and drove towards the middle school. Neither one of us talked all the way to the school. There was so much I wanted to ask her but nothing seemed right. When we pulled into the parking lot at the middle school she jumped out to find her brother and sister. When they got back to the car Seth and Leah crawled into the back seat giving me worried looks. I just smiled at them and waited for Bella to get back into the car.

"Um, Edward this is my sister Leah and my brother Seth. And this is Edward; he's…someone from school."

"Well I'd say I'm pretty close to being a friend now, don't you think?" I looked over at her not sure what her reaction would be.

"Right," she said before putting her seatbelt on and turning her head to look out the window. This girl has got my mind spinning. Did she not want us to be friends? Was I doing something wrong?

"What about getting groceries?" I heard a quiet voice from the back seat. I looked in the rear view mirror and saw both of the kids staring at me with fear in their eyes. Why did it seem like these kids were afraid of me?

Bella turned to face the back and answered Leah. "It's raining too hard today, we can do it tomorrow."

"But won't dad be mad?"

"It'll be okay, I have enough for tonight and we can go tomorrow."

"Do you need to go to the store?" I asked. "I don't mind driving you there."

"No, it's okay that would be too much to ask." She looked over at me briefly to answer then looked back out her window.

"It's not a problem. I can drive you there if you want."

"We just need to go home." She said.

"Okay." I was starting to get the impression that she didn't like me giving them a ride home. She seemed nervous and worried.

The entire drive to her house was done in silence and once I pulled up in front of their house Seth and Leah hopped out but when Bella reached for the handle I grabbed her hand, when she turned around to face me I gave her a look that told her I wanted to talk to her.

"Here Leah take the keys, I'll be there in a minute." She handed the keys to Leah and both she and Seth ran to the door out of the rain.

"Thanks for the ride Edward, but I really need to go," she said turning back towards me.

"I just need to know that you are okay."

"I'm fine, why?" She said with a confused look on her face.

"Earlier when I mentioned talking to your dad you had kind of like a panic attack and I'm just curious why that happened."

"I've been having a bad week and I guess my emotions got a little out of hand."

"That still doesn't explain what happened."

"Edward, it was no big deal, please, just let it go. " she closed he eyes as she said that and I could see the panic rising up in her again. I reached out and rubbed the back of my hand against her cheek gently until she opened her eyes and looked up at me.

"I'll let it go if that's what you want, just promise me that if something isn't right you'll talk to me. I want us to be friends and I want you to be able to trust me." She nodded her head and reached for the door handle. I watched her until she was inside her house then headed back to the high school for practice.

I couldn't focus at all during football practice and coach was yelling at me constantly. Something isn't right with Bella and I needed to know what it was. I know she told me to let it go and I said I would, but I can't.


	4. Chapter 3

So here's the next chapter, this is my first story and I'm still trying to get this fanfic stuff figured out. Most of the time I just read them but I finally decided to write one. The songs at the beginning of each chapter are there to kind of tell the story of what's happening plus I love music and a certain song is what gave me the inspiration to finally write this after having it float around in my head for a few years. After I thought about it though, I realized I could write it as a fanfic. So with the encouragement of the C-11 I finally did it. Thanks Redlulu for being an awesome beta and cyber friend.

Oh I guess I better do a disclaimer: I don't own **Twilight** or it's characters, Stephenie Meyer's does. I'm just one of those obsessed fans that can make Bella and Edward be whoever I want them to be.

* * *

**Maybe: Kelly Clarkson**

I'm strong  
But I break  
I'm stubborn  
And I make plenty of mistakes  
Yeah I'm hard  
And life with me is never easy  
To figure out, to love  
I'm jaded but oh so lovely  
All you have to do is hold me  
And you'll know and you'll see just how sweet it can be  
If you'll trust me, love me, let me  
Maybe, maybe

Someday  
When we're at the same place  
When we're on the same road  
When it's okay to hold my hand  
Without feeling lost  
Without all the excuses  
When it's just because you love me, you let me, you need me  
Then maybe, maybe  
All you have to do is hold me  
And you'll know and you'll see just how sweet it can be  
If you'll trust me, love me, let me  
Maybe, maybe

I'm confusing as hell  
I'm north and south  
And I'll probably never have it all figured out  
But what I know is I wasn't meant to walk this world without you  
And I promise I'll try  
Yeah I'm gonna try to give you every little part of me  
Every single detail you missed with your eyes  
Then maybe  
Maybe, yeah maybe, maybe, maybe, yeah maybe

One day  
We'll meet again and you'll need me, you'll see me completely  
Every little bit  
Oh yeah maybe you'll love me, you'll love me then

I don't want to be tough  
And I don't want to be proud  
I don't need to be fixed and I certainly don't need to be found  
I'm not lost  
I need to be loved  
I just need to be loved  
I just want to be loved by you and I won't stop 'cause I believe  
That maybe, yeah maybe  
Maybe, yeah maybe, maybe, maybe, yeah maybe

I should know better than to touch the fire twice  
But I'm thinking maybe, yeah maybe you might

Maybe, love maybe

**BPOV**

"Bella, what were thinking?" Leah asked me once I came through the door after Edward dropped us off.

"I wasn't thinking anything. He drove by and offered me a ride, I couldn't say no."

"What if dad's finds out?" Seth asked.

"No one saw us ride with him, so as long as you both don't say anything then we'll be fine. And it's not like it would be the first time I ever got in trouble for doing something he didn't want me to."

"But this isn't just something out of place, or buying M&M's this is someone giving us a ride home from school. Dad would kill you if he found out." Leah practically shouted.

"Seth, why don't you get started on your homework, I'll come help you in a little bit." Seth walked away into the kitchen with his bag leaving Leah and I alone as we began folding laundry in the living room. "Leah, it was just a ride home, James won't find out. And please don't say anything about killing when Seth is around, you know how scared he gets ever since mom died."

"Well who is he and why did he want to give you a ride home?" Leah asked.

"Edward Cullen," I explained. "He's a friend of Jaspers, who's Alice's boyfriend. He asked me to the homecoming dance today."

"You told him no right?" Leah looked at me with fear in her eyes.

"Of course I did, but he wouldn't take no for an answer so eventually I told him I'd think about it. That's probably why he offered me a ride home to impress me so I would say yes. I'll just continue to think about it until he finds someone else or he accepts that I can't go." I frowned down at the floor and slowed my hands with the folding I began to think of how nice it would be to be normal and go to the dance with him and have fun with my friends and not have to worry about anything.

"You like him don't you?"

I brought myself out of my thoughts quickly. "It doesn't matter, nothing can ever happen. Besides he's probably just using me to get back at his ex-girlfriend." I tried to justify his interest in me as nothing more than an attempt to make Jessica jealous and the way she behaved today when she saw us in the hall told me it was working.

"Well if there was a way for you to go to the dance would you?"

"I don't know. Probably, but there isn't any possible way I can so it doesn't matter."

"Bella," Leah asked, changing the subject. "You said we could talk about getting out of here when we got home and I really am serious about this. Maybe this Edward guy could help us. Isn't his mom a teacher and his dad a doctor?" It was no secret who the Cullen's were in our small town. Leah had just never met any of them until today.

"Leah, no one can help us. If anyone knew what was happening it would only cause more trouble, I've told you this a thousand times. The only thing we can do is live with it. Once you and Seth are old enough to leave then I'll run away for good and pray with everything in me that he doesn't find me. I'll even leave the country if I have to. The only problem with that is I'll never be able to see you and Seth again."

"That's your big plan? Just wait until we're gone then run and never see us again?"

"Do you have a better idea? Leah, we've lived with this for a long time and nothing has ever changed. Mom tried so many times to find someone to help us but no one ever did and eventually he killed her because of it. I've gone over different scenarios in my head and the only option I have is this."

"I don't like this plan, there has to be something we can do."

"Leah stop, you aren't the one that get's beat by him so let me be the one that decides how I want to handle this," I snapped at her.

"You are so stubborn sometimes." She yelled. "This isn't just about you, it affects all of us, you know. He might not hurt Seth and me physically but it hurts us every time we have to see him hurt you. We always have to fear that one of these days he's going to end up killing you like he did mom. It's not just you Bella." She stormed off up the stairs and slammed her door behind her. I knew this affected them but there wasn't anything I could do. She stayed in her room the rest of the day until James got home. I didn't know what to say to her or how to fix this.

I made James' favorite dish, enchiladas, just in case he had heard something about today maybe that would prevent him from being too mad. All through dinner he was silent so I assumed he hadn't heard anything. After dinner I quickly cleared the table and began doing dishes while James went upstairs to take a shower. I didn't hear him come back down but I felt it. He pushed me out of the way of the sink roughly and I slammed into the edge of the counter. It burned instantly but I didn't make a sound.

"I have to go out of town for a few days." He said gruffly, between taking drinks of his water. "I should be back late Sunday night. I'm leaving you in charge while I'm gone and I better not get any reports that you are not behaving. I will have a couple of my men stop in to check on all of you daily. Can I trust that you will behave as if I was here?"

"Of course James, everything will be fine."

"I'll be leaving first thing in the morning. Pack my bags for me tonight." He ordered.

"Yes sir."

He went out like he did most nights. I never knew where he went but I was glad he was gone. I tried to talk to Leah after I was done with the dishes but she slammed her door in my face. Instead I went and packed James' stuff then went to my room to work on my own homework. My only thought was James was going to be gone on Saturday night. I could go to the dance. I'm sure Alice could help me with a dress. Just as I thought about actually going my mind again put doubt there and I thought about Edward only asking me to get Jessica back. I can't let him use me like that. But what if he's not using me and he sincerely does want to go with me? Who am I kidding why would he want to go with me? I'm probably just the only senior who doesn't have a date yet so I was his only option since he would never be seen with an under classman. But I could just go and have fun with Alice if nothing more. I've never been able to do anything like this before and it would be nice to hang out with Alice outside of school. But what if I do get caught? He said he was going to have some of his men look in on us what if they saw me and told him?

I spent most of the night going back and forth trying to decide what to do. And by morning I still hadn't decided.

**EPOV**

"Edward, are feeling you okay?" My mother Esme asked me at the breakfast table. "You look a little pale."

"I'm fine mom." I replied. "I didn't sleep well last night that's all."

"Is something bothering you son?" My dad Carlisle asked while putting down the paper he was reading to look over at me.

"I don't know, maybe. It's probably just the game this weekend." I was trying to play it off as nothing but truthfully I was worried about Bella. Something is wrong and I intend to find out what it is.

"You've never been this worried about a game before," Esme remarked.

"It's really nothing, I need to go. I have to pick someone up for school." I grabbed my backpack and car keys and dashed out the door before they could ask any more questions.

I began driving towards Bella's house as fast as I could, I wanted to get there before she left but I was already behind. I decided to wait a couple blocks up since I knew Bella would be walking by very soon, instead of going to their house. I sat back in my seat and took out my history book in an attempt to read the chapter I was supposed to read last night.

Instead of doing my homework like I was supposed to last night I had been on the computer searching the internet to find out what was going on with Bella. From what I could find, my options were she was either anorexic, since she never seemed to eat, or she has some sort of anxiety disorder or depression. I hadn't really come up with much. I didn't know enough about her to have anything concrete to go on. But I wanted to help her. I just didn't know how or why I wanted to help her.

Before I knew it I had fallen asleep in my car waiting for her. When I woke up I realized it was already past 8 and school had already begun.

"Shit." I yelled through the car. I looked around to see if anyone was around then I drove back by Bella's house. It looked empty so I headed to school. She had to have seen me parked on the side of the road. Why didn't she fucking wake me up? I was pissed now. If she didn't want a ride she could have at least woke me so I wasn't late.

I ran down the hall to my class. When I entered everyone looked up at me and Mr. Gonzalez gave me a raised eyebrow then looked at his watch.

"I know I'm late, I'm sorry, I overslept." I gave him the true excuse and rushed back to my seat next to Jasper.

"What happened to you?" Jasper whispered over to me.

"Like I said, I overslept." I looked away from Jasper to pay attention to the pop quiz that was sitting in front of me. After the quizzes were graded and handed back to us I looked at my paper and saw a 74/100 and I could see in the corner of my eye that Jasper had seen it and was looking at me confused. I was never late, and very rarely ever missed a day of school. It wasn't like me to be this unprepared for class either. This girl is messing with my mind and I need to get away from her before I go insane. But something was drawing me in and I couldn't explain it. I had this overpowering need to be where ever she was and protect her or help her, from what, I didn't know. After class Jasper tried to talk to me but I blew him off and rushed down the hall to Bella's locker. I saw her standing there with her jacket covering her head.

"Hey," I said coming up behind her. She turned briefly to look at me then turned back to her locker. "You had to have seen me."

"Seen you where?" She asked while shoving books into her backpack.

"I was sitting in my car on the side of the road, waiting for you."

"I saw your car but I didn't know why you were there so I didn't stop to find out."

"I was waiting to give you a ride to school, but I ended up falling asleep."

"Edward," She finally turned around to look at me. "I appreciate the ride yesterday, especially with the rain, but you can't give me rides to and from school anymore."

"Why?" I asked. "Is it because of Leah and Seth? I don't mind giving them rides too."

"No, it has nothing to do with them. I just can't take rides from you."

"Well what about the dance? Have you decided yet?" I asked.

She sighed and looked down at the floor. "Edward, I would love to go with you, but I can't. I'm really sorry. I hope you can find someone else to go with."

I clenched my teeth together. I wanted to say something to her. I wanted to ask her about my suspicions, or to ask her more questions so I could have more to research. But nothing seemed right.

"I have to get to class." She pushed past me and walked down the hallway.

By lunch the only thing I wanted to do was take a nap, but I didn't, I needed to find out why she wouldn't go, why she turned me down, why she's pushing me away. I know there's a reason for it and I have to get to the bottom of this. Even though every cell of my body was telling me to stay out of it and let it go my mind was telling me she needed me, maybe not me specifically but she needed someone.

At lunch that day I sat next to her once again and like she did the day before she kept her head down reading her book. I got a good look of the book and discovered she was reading Pride and Prejudice. The book was tattered and falling apart but it didn't seem to bother her.

"Edward, did you hear me?" Jasper asked bringing me out of my thoughts.

"What?"

"I asked if you had talked to coach yet." Jasper said. "He was pretty mad yesterday."

"Oh, no I haven't seen him today. I'm sure he'll get over it though." I replied rubbing my face.

"Dude, are you okay?" He asked sounding concerned.

"I'm fine, just tired."

"Well you better get over it because if you have another practice like you did yesterday coach is going to be pissed."

"It'll be fine Jasper." I brushed it off, but I knew coach was going to be pissed.

I looked over at Bella who was still reading her book. I leaned over to her and whispered in her ear if I could talk to her. She never looked up but nodded her head and closed her book. I reached down and picked up her bag for her and said goodbye to Jasper and Alice who had big smiles on their faces. We headed out to the hallway and once we were alone I stopped her.

"I know something is wrong, and I want you to tell me what it is," I began.

"Nothing is wrong Edward." She replied.

"Bella, you had a panic attack yesterday, you flinch every time I try to touch you and I don't think you even notice it, you don't eat, you try to avoid me and everyone else as much as possible, and yesterday when you were riding with me you kept looking out the window like you were watching for someone. Then on top of that your brother and sister both looked scared of me. I know something is going on. Do you need help or something? I'm sure after your mom died it was hard on all of you so maybe you need some counseling or a psychologist or something. My dad's a doctor he could recommend someone for you. I want to know everything there is about you, maybe then I'll understand who you really are and what I can do to help."

"Edward, seriously I'm fine. I don't need anything and if I did I know where to go. I'm just nervous around you and I'm not sure if I can trust you."

"I told you yesterday that you could trust me, I would never hurt you Bella." I moved a little closer to her but she stepped away.

"I don't think you would ever intentionally hurt me, but this whole dance thing is just to get back at Jessica and I don't want to be a part of it."

"This has nothing to do with the fucking dance Bella," I yelled in irritation. She tightened her shoulders and closed her eyes while stepping farther away from me. "I'm sorry," I whispered. "I didn't mean to yell at you."

"It's okay, she said shaking her eyes. I stepped closer to her and rubbed her arms to try and relax her.

"Bella, I want to help you but you have to let me in so I can. You have to talk to me, to tell me stuff about who you are."

"Like I said, if I needed help, I know where to go." She started to walk so I chased after her to stay in step with her.

"If you don't want help, will you at least talk to me? Be my friend if nothing more?" I asked, or more like begged. I figured if she would be my friend then eventually she might open up to me more and I could figure her out.

"I'm not that good of a friend Edward." She said looking straight ahead to where she was walking.

"I don't care."

"I have to go to class," she said walking a little faster. I'll talk to you later." I stopped as she walked into her class and was gone.

The days following up to the dance were uneventful, Bella still didn't talk to me and it seemed like she tried to avoid me even more than before. I knew there was a reason for it and I wanted to find out what it was. I just didn't know how to do that.


	5. Chapter 4

**Take Me There: Rascal Flatts**

There's a place in your  
heart, nobody's been,  
Take me there.  
Things nobody knows,  
Not even your friends,  
Take me there.  
Tell me bout your momma, your daddy, your hometown,  
Show me around,  
I want see it all, don't leave anything out  
I want to know, everything about you.  
And I want to go, down every road you've been.  
Where your hopes and dreams, and wishes live,  
Where you keep the rest of your life hid,  
I want to know the girl behind that pretty stare,  
Take me there. Your first real kiss, your first true love,  
You were scared.  
Show me where,  
You learned about life, spent your summer nights, without a care.  
I want to roll down mainstreet, the back roads,  
Like you did, when you were a kid,  
What made you who you are,  
Tell me what your story is.

I want to know, everything about you.  
And I want to go, down every road you've been.  
Where your hopes and dreams, and wishes live,  
Where you keep the rest of your life hid,  
I want to know the girl behind that pretty stare  
Take me there.

I want to know, everything about you.  
Yeah, everything about you baby.  
I want to go, down every road you've been.  
Where your hopes and dreams and wishes live,  
Where you keep the rest of Your life hid,  
I want to know the girl behind that pretty stare.  
Take me, take me, take me there.  
Take me there.

**BPOV**

On Wednesday morning James left. He didn't tell us where he was going, but he did let us know officers Sam and Garrett would be stopping in to check on us. Sam was an older man who had graying hair and wrinkled skin, but the main thing I noticed about him was how unfriendly he was. He came in the mornings to check on us, and every morning he looked irritated with having to do this inane job. But since James was the boss, he had to do it.

Garrett on the other hand was really nice. He was in his mid 30's with sandy colored hair and blue eyes. He was a scruffy looking guy, who didn't seem to fit the profile of a police officer. He looked more like someone who belonged in the mountains. That first night he came to check on us, he brought us a pizza and a movie. It was quite the treat for us. We hardly ever had pizza or were allowed to watch a movie or TV.

During the week we did everything like we always did but it was nice with James being gone. Seth loved being able to watch cartoons every day after school. Leah was still not talking to me, she usually came home and went straight to her room until dinner and then went back right after. I knew she was mad at me but I didn't understand why all of a sudden it had become so important to her to get away from James.

Sometimes I think she suffered more emotionally than any of us. She had witnessed 2 mothers die. Her biological mother she never talked about, so I don't know what happened to her or how she actually died, whether it was at the hands of James like my mother's death, or if it really was a car accident like James had said.

At school I tried even harder than before to avoid Edward. I didn't want to tell him no. Deep down I really wanted Edward to like me and I wanted to go to that dance, but I knew as long as James was my father there was no way it would work. James would find out. And I couldn't put Edward in that type of danger.

The big game was Friday night and I wanted to know how our school did, but I didn't know how to find out. I figured Alice would tell me all the details on Monday so I would have to wait till then.

On Saturday night when Garrett came to check on us he brought us burgers and fries from the diner his mother ran.

"So I guess this is my last night checking on you, kids." Garrett said while placing the food on the table. Seth and Leah started digging through the bags to get the food out. They looked like wolves fighting over the last scrap of meat. I couldn't help but laugh at them.

"Thank you for the dinner, Garrett," I said. "We really appreciate it."

"No problem kid. I figure with your dad gone you would like a little break from cooking." He replied. "Your dad says you're a great cook, Bella." He chuckled a little. "He talks about how hard it's going to be when you go off to college and he won't have anything but TV dinners to eat."

"When I go off to college?" I asked, confused by his comment.

"Yeah, your dad says you're planning to go to culinary school." He said looking at me with a questionable look. This was obviously one of James' cover-ups.

"Oh, well it's a possibility. I haven't decided yet." I replied trying to play along.

"Well I'm sure you will be great at it if you do decide to go." He headed for the door to leave.

"Thanks again for being so kind to us this week." I said standing at the door watching him walk to his car.

"It's not a problem Bella, really. You three are great, James is lucky to have such well behaved kids. Some of the kids in this town are downright hellions." He said with a giggle. "Which reminds me, I've got to get over to the school and make sure the kids behave tonight at this dance. Are you planning to go?"

"No, I'm not that great of a dancer. Plus with James gone I think it would be best to stay here with Seth and Leah," I replied.

"Well I hope you have a good night then," he said. "I'll see you later Bella."

"Goodnight, Garrett." I walked back into the kitchen to see if Leah and Seth had saved me anything to eat.

"He's nice." Seth said through bites.

I smiled at Seth. "Yes he is."

Just as I sat down to eat the doorbell rang. Leah looked at me with worried eyes.

"It's probably, Garrett. Maybe he forgot something." I walked towards the door knowing Seth and Leah were following close behind. I opened the door and was not expecting to see who was standing on the steps.

"Edward," I said taken aback by his appearance. He had on black slacks and a dark blue, button down, shirt. He looked amazing and smelled really good too. "What are you doing here?"

He gave me that half smile, looking up at me. "Well, I figured since you wouldn't go to the dance with me, maybe I could persuade you into going to dinner with me instead. My brother said your dad is out of town at some training thing in Seattle, so I thought tonight would be a great night to take you to the Italian restaurant in Port Angeles."

"But don't you want to go to the dance?" I asked.

"Not really," he confessed. "I was only going because I promised the guys I would be there for this thing we were planning, but I don't think they're going to miss me much. Besides, I would rather spend my time with you." I blushed when he said that. "Pease, Bella."

I turned around to look at Leah and Seth, who both had big grins on their faces. Leah nodded her head in approval.

"Does this mean I can have your burger?" Seth asked. I laughed at him.

"Did you already eat?" Edward questioned.

"No, I was just about to," I replied. "Officer Garrett just left from checking in on us. He brought us food from the diner."

"Oh, well if you haven't eaten then I'd love for you to come with me. Leah you can take care of Seth for a couple hours can't you?"

Leah came into the doorway now with a big smile. "Of course I can. Go Bella, have fun. We'll be fine."

I glared over at Leah.

"See," Edward began. "Everything is taken care of, Leah and Seth will be fine, I can give them my cell phone number just in case, Seth will eat your burger, and we'll only be gone for a couple hours. Now you have no excuses to turn me down."

"I'm not dressed for a restaurant." I didn't feel appropriately dressed for anything. I had on a dark green, sweater with blue jeans and my hair was hanging loosely around my shoulders barely brushed. It was a Saturday I didn't care about my appearance, until this very moment.

"You look perfect," he said with a smile. "Now get your coat, we have reservations for seven."

I looked over at Leah and Seth one last time. I really wanted to go. I couldn't help it but I liked Edward a lot and the fact that he wanted to take me to dinner instead the dance, where Jessica would obviously be, told me that maybe this wasn't only about making her jealous. Maybe he did really want to go with me.

"Are you sure you and Seth will be okay?" I asked Leah.

"Of course, Bella, I know how to take care of my little brother. We'll watch TV and wait for you to get home. We'll be fine."

"O…okay," I said. I grabbed my coat and followed Edward out to his car. He opened the door for me and I slid into the passenger seat. As he walked around to get in I looked back at the house and saw Leah and Seth with huge grins on their faces, gawking out the window. I shook my head and laughed. I felt really silly even doing this.

The car ride to Port Angeles was silent other than the music playing from the CD player. I think we were both a little nervous. At least I know I was. I felt better knowing that we were going to Port Angeles where hopefully no one would notice me there and word wouldn't get back to James somehow.

Once we parked, Edward came around to open my door again but as I stepped out my foot got stuck on the carpet and I fell into Edwards arms again. My face felt hot instantly. He just smiled and helped me to my feet.

"I'm starting to wonder if you do that on purpose." He said with a raised eyebrow. I tried to hide my face in my hair.

"It's okay, Bella," he said repressing a chuckle. "I've told you before, I kind of like that part of you."

I took a deep breath and walked towards the doors. Edward walked next to me with his hands in his coat pockets.

"Good evening," the hostess greeted. "How may I help you?"

"We have a reservation under Cullen." Edward answered.

"Of course sir, right this way." The hostess grabbed 2 menus and led us down an aisle to a booth in the far back of the restaurant.

"Is this booth adequate for you sir?" The hostess asked.

"It's exactly what I asked for, Thank you."

"Your waitress will be right with you." She handed us our menus and headed back to the front desk.

"Did you ask for this booth?" I inquired.

"I asked for something private when I made the reservations."

"Oh," I said picking up the menu. It was strange but it was almost like Edward knew I would want to stay out of sight of others. And he knew James was going to be gone so that was strange too. How did he know that? I tried to find something on the menu that looked good but everything looked confusing to me. There were so many dishes and words that I didn't understand.

"The spaghetti with Kobe beef meatballs is excellent. I get it every time," Edward said. Again it felt like he knew I was having trouble picking something.

"That sounds really good," I sighed, placing the menu back on the table.

"Good evening, I'm Heidi and I'll be your waitress tonight. Have you had a chance to decide what to drink?

Edward looked over to me, allowing me to go first. "I'll just have a glass of water."

"And for you sir," she asked turning her body to face him.

"A coke for me, and I think we'll both be having the spaghetti with Kobe beef meatballs." He looked over to me to be sure, so I nodded my head in agreement. "And could you bring a basket of garlic bread?"

"Of course, I'll be right back with your drinks."

"Thank you," Edward said handing the menus to her.

"Do you come here a lot?" I asked.

"Not as much anymore, growing up this was my parents' favorite places to take us, but now they normally come on their own."

"Have you brought Jessica here?" I was surprised by my sudden jealousy.

"Actually, no," he smiled. "Jessica is more of a classier type of girl. "This place is too small and quaint for her.

I looked down, at the table feeling like I wasn't important enough to him to take to a classy place. Not that I wanted to but it made me feel very inadequate compared to Jessica.

"Besides," he began. "This place is special to me, and I don't share it with many people." I was instantly brought out of my dejected state by his words and smiled at him.

The waitress came back by and placed our drinks on the table along with a basket of garlic bread. Edward grabbed a plate and placed a piece of the bread on it then handed it to me before getting a piece for himself.

"So, how was the game last night?" I asked before taking a bite of the bread.

"We lost."

"Sorry, I know it was a big game for you."

"Yeah, well they are the hardest team in the league and we only lost by a field goal so it wasn't too bad."

"Was your coach mad at you?"

"He's always mad at someone. I was the lucky one this week."

I took a drink of my water as my eyes wandered around the décor of the restaurant. He was right it was very quaint with old looking paintings on the walls and dimmed chandeliers hanging from the ceiling. The colors were rich with reds and browns and deep yellows. It gave off a homey, romantic ambiance.

"Can I ask you something?" He asked, bringing me back to where I should be focusing my attention.

"What do you want to ask?"

"The book you read every day at lunch," he began. "Is there a reason why you read a book that's falling apart?" I thought it was kind of a weird question.

"It was my mom's. She used to read it to me a lot growing up."

"Your mom read 'Pride and Prejudice' to you as a kid?" He asked with a raised eyebrow and a smirk.

"She read a lot of classics to me. Like 'Romeo and Juliet,' 'Wuthering Heights,' 'Taming of the Shrew,' 'The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn,' 'Alice in Wonderland.' I never understood much of them as a kid but now I get them and I enjoy reading."

"Your mom sounds really cool."

"She was," I said hanging my head.

"What happened to your mom?" He asked. "I've heard so many rumors about what happened and I'm curious what the truth is."

"I would prefer not to talk about it." I could feel tears misting in my eyes.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked."

"It's just hard to talk about."

"I understand." He reached over and placed his hand on mine for reassurance. He pulled his hand back as our food arrived.

"Can I get you anything else?" Heidi asked.

"That will be all, thank you." Edward replied.

I began to eat the spaghetti and he was right, it was exquisite. I'd never tasted anything so good in my life. The meatballs melted in my mouth and the sauce tasted fresh and full of real flavor. I loved it.

"Can I ask you something?" I asked between bites.

"Shoot."

"How did you get into football? I can tell it's important to you and from what I've heard you're really good."

"It's kind of a long story."

"That's okay."

"Well, my older brother, Emmett played and growing up I wanted to be just like him. He had the body to play, he was big and muscular and I was this skinny little kid that was more the brains of the family. School always came easy for me, but not football. In middle school I started working out constantly trying to build muscle so I could be as good as my brother. It never worked though, the coaches would always make me play defensive positions thinking I was like Emmett, but I wasn't strong enough for that. Eventually one of the coaches asked me to play quarterback at a practice and I kind of found my niche there. So I started practicing as quarterback and then the coach had me play a game and we won. Everyone was cheering me on and my parent's and my brother were so proud that I wanted to play all the time."

I listened intently to his story.

"Sorry, that's probably a boring story to you." He said looking down.

"No, not at all, it's actually quite interesting," I assured. "Did your brother go off to play in college?"

"He did at first, but then he got really into the party scene, got arrested a couple times, and his grades dropped so he lost his scholarship. He came home and moped around the house for about six months then out of the blue informed us he was going into the police academy. He actually works for your dad now, I'm sure you've met him."

"I don't think I have." I knew James had three officers that worked for him, Sam and Garrett I knew now, but I had yet to meet the third. I guess that would be Emmett. And that would also be how Edward knew James was out of town.

"Well I'm sure you will at some point. He's only been working for your dad about a year now."

"I'm sure I will." I agreed.

We finished eating our food in silence. When we were done he paid the bill, leaving a hefty tip and we walked outside.

"Would you like to take a walk with me?" He asked.

"Sure," I said with a smile.

We walked slowly along the dimly lit sidewalk swinging our arms lightly at our sides.

"There's a park up the road, once we get there we can turn back," he explained.

"Okay," I said. I felt so comfortable with him. He was always so quiet and gentle with me. And he wasn't asking me any personal questions like he was during the week. I liked that.

"So what do you plan to do after high school?" He asked.

"I don't have any plans yet," I replied. I knew I wouldn't be doing anything other than taking care of James and protecting Seth and Leah, but I couldn't tell him that. No matter how much I trusted him and felt safe with him, he couldn't know. "What are your plans?"

"Hopefully I'll get a scholarship for football somewhere."

"So you plan to continue playing football for a long time then?"

"As long as they'll let me," he laughed. "If I make it to the pros that would be a dream come true, but if that doesn't work I'll probably go to medical school. My dad really wants me to follow in his footsteps."

"That's great that you have those types of goals."

"What about you, what are your goals for the future?"

"I don't really have any, right now," I answered. "Mostly my life revolves around Seth and Leah."

"You really care about them don't you?" He asked.

"They're my life. I'm all they have to depend on and I have to be there for them through everything."

"What about your dad?" He asked. "Doesn't he help take care of them?"

"James works a lot," I explained.

"Why do you call him James?" He asked. "He is your dad isn't he?"

"Um… he's my step dad."

"But, Leah and Seth are his kids right?"

"Leah was from his first marriage and my mom and James had Seth shortly after they were married."

"What happened to Leah's mom?"

"I don't know all the details, they don't talk about it, but she was in a car accident when Leah was four."

"Wow," he said. "That must be hard on him, to lose two wives like that?"

"I think it's harder on Leah, she's lost two mothers. And Seth was so young at the time."

"I guess I didn't think about that," he said sheepishly.

We reached the park and turned around to head back to the car.

"It's okay," I assured.

The walk back to his car was done in silence and most of the car ride back was too.

"Can I ask you another question?" I asked.

"Anything," he smiled over at me.

"Why did you ask me to dinner?"

"What?" He looked over at me with a puzzled look.

"You could have gone to the dance, why did you ask me to dinner instead?"

"I figured it was kind of obvious," he stated. "Bella, I like spending time with you, and I want us to be friends. I know you had a lot of reasons to not want to go to the dance, so I figured going to dinner in a secluded little restaurant would be easier for you."

"I see," I felt a little sad that he said friends. The thought of someone wanting me to be more than a friend, would be amazing. But even being friends was impossible and him saying that and with us getting closer to my house made me realize that even more.

"You're upset now, aren't you?"

"No, I was only curious," I exclaimed. "The thing is Edward, we can't be friends. I really appreciate you taking me to dinner. I had a lot of fun, but we can't do this anymore."

"Okay," he said, as he parked in front of my house. He turned to me looking in my eyes attentively. "I expected this, what's your excuse this time?"

He expected this? What did he expect that I would tell him we couldn't be friends?

"It's complicated." I shook my head.

"Bella, you have to stop this, one minute you act like you want to be friends, then the next minute you push me away. Why?"

"It's hard to explain."

"Try," he encouraged. I wanted to tell him, I wanted to trust him. But what if something happened to him because of me?

"I'm really tired, Edward. Can we talk about this some other time?"

He sighed heavily and sat back in his seat. "Yeah, whatever," he said in irritation. "Next week you'll be back to avoiding me and I'll go back to trying to figure you out."

"I'm sorry." I began to tear up at his words. I knew he was mad, and I didn't blame him.

He opened his door and came around to open mine.

"Thank you for dinner, Edward," I said stepping out of the car. "I really did enjoy spending time with you tonight." He didn't say anything or even look at me so I turned and walked up the path to my house. I looked back as I reached the door and he just stood there leaning up against his car with his arms crossed against his chest, watching me leave. I forced a smile at him, and opened the door only to come face to face with my worst fear.

"James," I said fearfully, my breath getting caught in my chest.

"And what the hell do you think you were doing?" He asked in rage. He shoved me up against the wall, I tried to look around quickly, I saw Leah lying on the living room floor in a crumpled heap and Seth curled up in the corner of the couch crying and rocking back and forth.

This was it, the reason why Edward and I could never be friends. My eyes filled with tears as I realized what a huge mistake I had made.


	6. Chapter 5

**As some of you know this chapter was kind of hard for me to write, sorry there isn't much excitement in this one, but the following chapters should have lots of fun stuff. Chapter 6 should be up in a few days. Thanks again to redlulu and bzeemomof4 for helping me with all the editing and being such great friends, writing at 3 am can make me forget all those coma's and periods. M12 heart all of you.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or its characters Stephenie Meyer does.**

* * *

Absolute: The Fray

I've seen this one before, the girl she gets away  
Everybody knows it but no one tries to stop it  
Cause she barely even knows him but if she could see inside  
Everything is quiet as she waits to tell him who she is

Is this all we get to be absolute

Quiet but I'm sure there is something here  
Tell me everything cause I want to hear

It's a kiss sits upon on her lips that waits for planes and battle ships  
She wants to be a dancer and he has got a picture  
On his wall and it's a sailor in a new port every night  
Yet man was born to trouble like sparks fly upwards innocent

Is this all we get to be absolute

Quiet but I'm sure there is something here  
Tell me everything cause I want to hear

All we are and all we want  
40 years come and gone  
All we are in photographs  
Will never be taken

Quiet but I'm sure there is something here  
Tell me everything cause I want you here  
Quiet but I'm sure there is something here  
Tell me everything cause I want to hear

**EPOV**

After Bella had once again said she couldn't go to the dance, I had decided to leave it at that. I didn't want to go to this fucking dance anyway but I felt obligated because of my teammates. So, I decided I would go alone, do this stupid skit and get the hell out of there as soon as I was done. I could have asked another girl, they were lining up waiting for me to choose one of them. But, to be honest, I wasn't in the mood for any girl right now; except for Bella. She was intriguing, mysterious, exciting, and beautiful. I had known her pretty much my entire life but until now, I never paid much attention to her. I wasn't sure if my interest in her was genuine or if it was only because I wanted to figure her out. She was a new puzzle that had my entire focus.

For the rest of the week, I began studying everything about her. Every class, everything she ate, everything she said, the way she walked and tripped, what she wore, the way her lips would move when she mouthed the words silently when she was reading, how she twirled her hair around her finger, or bit her bottom lip when she was at an exciting part in her book. Even though I'm sure she had read this book at least a dozen times by the looks of it, she still looked like it was the first. I followed her home a couple times and watched her house from a distance to see if I could learn anything about her home life, but once they were in the house, they didn't emerge again. I had literally become her stalker.

After studying her every move, which I had decided to call it 'studying' because it sounded so much better than stalking, I had finally come to the only conclusion I could come up with. She had an eating disorder. It was the only thing that made sense. She never ate anything at lunch, she barely picked at the taco I had bought her when we skipped class, she was slender and small, she always seemed tired and had dark circles under her eyes, and her skin was pale and chalky. Being a doctor's son, I knew what the signs were. Plus, the fact that she didn't want me to talk to her dad, made me wonder if she was afraid I would say something about her not eating at lunch. It all made sense. Now I needed to test her and prove my suspicions so I could get her help. I didn't understand my need to help her, but it overpowered everything else. I assumed that maybe seeing my dad help people every day at the hospital and seeing my mom help a bunch of second graders learn how to read and write, and now my brother being a police officer, dedicating his life to helping others, maybe it was just bred in me to help people, and I knew Bella needed help, I just didn't know what kind of help I could offer her.

After the game, which we lost on Friday night, Emmett said that I needed a break; so he let me stay at his apartment for the night. It was nice being away from mom and dad. They had been grilling me all week about my strange behavior. I didn't tell them anything, but part of me wanted to discuss Bella with my father to get his opinion, but I wanted to be sure before I said anything.

While Emmett and I were eating pizza, after the game, he mentioned how his boss was at a training seminar in Seattle and wouldn't be back until Monday. He joked about how he was in charge while the chief was gone, but he was the rookie of the small forks police force so I knew that wasn't true. Plus, nothing ever happened in our small town to ever need police, let alone someone in charge if the chief was gone. Emmett and the rest of the force gave out random tickets to speeders, broke up domestic disputes, went on calls of vandalism, which was usually done by one of my classmates, once in a while they would have a report of a wild animal close to town, or a minor car accident to report to, but that was about as exciting as it got. He was dying for more excitement but he liked living close to home, so he could come back anytime he wanted for a home cooked meal or to have mom do his laundry. Plus, the chief, Bella's father, I guess you could say was his mentor. He was the one who convinced him to go into the police academy and also gave him the job. It wasn't like they needed more staff, but James had promised he would give him a job if he finished the training.

The only thought I had when he said that Bella's dad was out of town; was that I could go over to her house. Maybe I could convince her to go out to dinner with me. That would be the perfect test. If she didn't go, or didn't eat then that would be my final piece of the puzzle. I hated blowing off the team but I had to do this. So, I called Jasper and told him I had the flu. He understood and told me to get better. I think Alice was with him, because he didn't question me at all. I couldn't be that good of an actor.

But, to be cautious, when I called to make reservations at my favorite restaurant in the world; I asked for something private, just in case anyone from school happened to be there.

I was surprised when Bella actually agreed to go with me, after being convinced by her brother and sister to do so. I was even more surprised when she ate everything on her plate without even a second thought. There went that theory.

I was back to questioning everything again. There was so much I wanted to ask her, so much I wanted to know. But I was tongue tied most of the night, and I always seemed to say the wrong thing. It seemed like everything I said either made her sad or mad. Bella was not one to show much emotion, so, she changed the subject when I asked her about her mom. When I mentioned how awful it must have been for James to lose two wives, an angry tone that I had never witnessed from her came out. I was literally shocked. I couldn't even talk to her after that.

But she had opened up to me a little during the night and seemed to be getting comfortable with me, so that was a good sign. I had to figure out how to break through the wall she had built up around herself; to find out who she was.

As we got closer to her house, on the way back from Port Angeles, I noticed a change in her; she seemed tense and her breathing quickened. Then, she asked if she could ask me another question.

"Anything," I smiled at her, hoping she would know how true that word was. She could ask me or tell me anything.

"Why did you ask me to dinner?"

"What?" I was confused by her question. Why did she think I took her to dinner?

"You could have gone to the dance, why did you ask me to dinner instead?"

"I figured it was kind of obvious," I began. "Bella, I like spending time with you, and I want us to be friends." I did want us to be friends and I felt like that was a good start for her, but over the past couple days, I was beginning to wonder if I wanted it to be more. "I know you had a lot of reasons to not want to go to the dance; so, I figured going to dinner in a secluded little restaurant would be easier for you."

"I see." The way she said those simple words, made me realize that I had said the wrong thing. I knew what was coming next.

"You're upset now, aren't you?" I asked.

"No, I was only curious," she explained. "The thing is Edward, we can't be friends. I really appreciate you taking me to dinner. I had a lot of fun, but we can't do this anymore."

"Okay," I said in an indifferent tone, slamming the car in park, in front of her house. "I expected this, what's your excuse this time?" I knew this was coming the minute the word 'friends' left my lips. She was terrified to be anyone's friend besides Alice's. I didn't understand it.

"It's complicated," she diverted her eyes from mine to her hands and shook her head.

"Bella, you have to stop this, one minute you act like you want to be friends, then the next minute you push me away. Why?" I wanted answers I was tired of trying to figure this out. Mostly because every theory I had turned out to be wrong.

"It's hard to explain." She still wouldn't look at me. She continued to stare at her hands and began twisting her fingers together.

"Try," I begged, in the softest most endearing voice I could, considering I was frustrated to no end.

"I'm really tired, Edward. Can we talk about this some other time?" She was tired? More like she was avoiding.

"Yeah, whatever," I said, slamming back into my seat. "Next week you'll be back to avoiding me and I'll go back to trying to figure you out."

"I'm sorry." I could hear the tremble in her voice and I knew the best thing to do was to let her go. Whatever it was that had her fearing everything, was none of my business and I shouldn't care anymore. If she wasn't going to trust me and open up to me then I wasn't going to try anymore. I still had to be the polite gentleman that my parent's had raised so I got out and went around to open her door.

"Thank you for dinner, Edward," she hesitantly said, stepping out of the car. "I really did enjoy spending time with you tonight." I couldn't even look at her, if I was going to let her go; I had to hold on to whatever control I had left.

As she began walking away, I leaned up against the side of my car watching her leave, hoping she would come back and tell me everything I wanted to know. She did look back and give me a small forced smile before she walked through her door. I let out a heavy sigh, and got back into my car and drove away.

I felt sick to my stomach and my hands began to shake. I didn't know why, it wasn't like we were dating and we had broke up or something. It was weird, almost like I had been stabbed in the stomach. I didn't even feel like this when Jessica and I broke up. I pulled over on the side of the road and ran my hands over my face, up through my hair trying to calm down. I turned on the overhead light to look for a new CD. I needed something loud and hard to drown out my thoughts. But when the light came on I noticed Bella's coat lying on the floorboard. She had forgotten it in her attempt to push me away once again. I reached over to pick it up and held it in my lap for a second, trying to decide what to do. I could take it to her on Monday at school, maybe leave it at the office and ask the secretary to give it back to her. I didn't know if I could face her again if I brought it back now. But then I thought about how cold it's been in the mornings and with her walking to school, I had to bring it back to her tonight.

I flipped the car around and headed back to her house. Once again, as I parked in front of her house, I tried to talk myself out of going up to the door, but I had to, I could do this. I just had to hand her the jacket then leave. I got out of my car and walked up the path to her door. Right as my hand went up to the doorbell, I heard a thud and a muffled whimper or cry. I froze, not sure what I heard. I got closer to the door, trying to listen but I couldn't hear anything more. I tapped on the door lightly and waited.

When the door finally opened with a hasty pull, a man I recognized stood before me. He was tall, and built with shaggy, dirty blonde hair. It wasn't someone who had broken in; it was James Hunter, the chief of police, Bella's step father. My breath caught in my lungs, unable to exhale. My eyes darted around him to find Bella. I didn't know why, but seeing him in the door made me nervous and angry at the same time.

"What is it I can do for you son?" He asked in a calm, cheery voice. I was surprised by his tone.

"Um, Bella forgot her coat. I was dropping it off for her."

"Bella," he called.

Bella came around the corner and looked at me with wide eyes. She looked scared, worried, sad, there was so much there, I didn't even know what it all was. Her eyes looked a little blood shot and I could tell she was shaking, even though she was doing everything to cover it up. I could see the pulse in her neck, pumping so fast I was afraid it was going to burst. I looked back and forth between her and James as she came to the door. What was happening? Did I hear what I think I heard? And why was James home? Emmett said he was supposed to be gone until Monday.

I smiled and held the coat out to her. "You forgot this."

She reached out and tentatively took it from my hand, brushing her fingers against mine. "Thank you Edward," she said. "Alice shouldn't have sent you all the way over here to bring it to me. I could have gotten it on Monday."

What was she talking about? This must be a cover for James, so I played along. "She was worried you might not have anything else to wear."

"Can you thank her for me?" She asked. "And I promise, I'll get my part of the history assignment done."

"Yeah, it should be a fun project to do." I wasn't really sure where she was going with this story, but whatever it was, I had to make it believable.

"So, you must be Edward Cullen, Emmett Cullen's little brother?" James asked.

I looked up at him, startled out of my fixation on Bella. "Yes, sir," I replied.

"And what is this project you're working on?" He asked.

"I told you James, it's a project on the civil war that we have to do as a group. It's me, Alice, Jasper, and Edward." Bella cut in.

"I asked him, Bella," James said through gritted teeth.

"Um, well sir it's like Bella said, we have a project on the Civil War that we have to complete by next Friday." I think I got enough clues from Bella to pull this off. "We were over at Alice's house, going over ideas and deciding who would do what. We didn't have a chance to get together on Friday, because of the game, so we had to do it tonight. It's a good portion of our grade, so we want it to be good."

"Hmm," James huffed. He turned around for a moment and yelled into the other room for Seth and Leah to go to bed.

While he was turned around, I looked at Bella with shocked eyes and mouthed the words, "are you alright?"

She nodded her head and closed her eyes.

"Bella, say goodnight, it's time for bed." James demanded, turning his head back towards me.

"Goodnight, Edward, thanks for bringing my coat to me."

"Goodnight Bella." I wanted to grab her and take her with me. Something was up with James. She walked around the corner, giving me a small smile. I had every intention of walking away but James continued to talk.

"So I hear you guys lost the game yesterday." James said.

"Yes, we did but it wasn't bad."

"So, why weren't you and this Jasper kid at the dance tonight? Isn't this dance all about the football game and its players?"

Oh, great, how was I going to cover this up? Bella obviously hadn't thought of this. "Um, Jasper and Alice went later after we were done with the outline of the project. But I broke up with my girlfriend a few days ago, so I wasn't in the mood to go. That's why Alice sent me here to drop off Bella's coat." That sounded like a good story. Most of it was true.

"Well, thanks for bringing her coat back and I'll make sure she gets her share of the project done."

"You're welcome," I said. "Goodnight Sir." I turned around to walk back to my car.

"Goodnight Edward. And tell your father that anytime he'd like to go fishing again, to let me know." He shouted after me.

I turned slightly and nodded my head at him. I got back in my car and drove home. If I thought sleep was hard before; it was impossible now. I had even more unanswered questions then I did before. Why did Bella need to cover up where she was? Why did she look so scared when she saw me at the door? Something was off, and something about James bothered me. And what was the thud and crying I heard? I went to sleep restlessly that night with so many thoughts rushing through my head.

The next morning at breakfast Emmett came over like usual to eat, do laundry, and watch the game on the big screen.

"What's up with you?" Emmett asked, while we both sat on the couch watching the football game later that afternoon.

"What?" I was lounging back on the couch, staring at nothing, with all the same questions running through my head. I don't know why I was so obsessed with her. I think that was the most confusing thing for me. Last night, I had decided to not care anymore and let it go, but here I was, yet again, letting her consume my every thought.

"You've seemed distant all week, are you even paying attention to the game?" Emmett turned to look at me during a commercial break.

"I think, I'm just tired," I replied.

"Does this have anything to do with Jessica?" Emmett asked, with concern in his voice.

"Jessica, why would you ask about her?"

"I saw her last night at the dance with some other guy. I take it you broke up?"

"Yeah, no big surprise there," I rolled my eyes at his question.

"Where were you last night?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Port Angeles." I answered shortly.

"With who?" He asked.

"No one," I shifted in my seat and grabbed my water off the coffee table to take a drink.

The game came back on and Emmett's attention was once again on the game. I tried to focus on it, but I wasn't doing a very good job.

"Emmett, what do you know about the chief of police?" I asked.

"James?" He turned to look at me with a questioning look. "Why do you want to know about James?"

"I'm just curious," I said, taking another drink and grabbing a handful of chips.

"This wouldn't have anything to do with his daughter would it?" He asked, with a sly smile on his face.

"No," actually it had everything to do with her, but I couldn't tell him that. "I met him last night, and I was wondering what type of person he is."

"He's back already?" Emmett's eyes turned back to the game, half listening to me.

"Yeah, what do you know about him?"

"Honestly Edward, I don't know much about him. He lived in Arizona for most of his life, moved here with his daughter, shortly after his first wife died, married Renee Swan, had another baby, then his wife went psycho and eventually committed suicide." He grabbed a chip and shoved it into his mouth. "He's a really nice guy Edward. He's always helping me out and he gave me the job."

"Does he ever talk about his kids?"

His face grew into a huge knowing smile. "This is about Bella isn't it? Does my little brother have a little bit of a crush on the chief's daughter and he wants to know whether or not the chief is going to shoot him if he asks her out?" He laughed loudly at his own joke.

I got up to leave the room.

"Bro, I'm sorry," Emmett said, as I stood up. "I think it's good though. I'm glad you're moving on from Jessica. She was a bitch and you deserve better."

"I don't have a fucking crush on her." I turned around to face him, glaring at him. "I barely know her. I was asking about James." I turned back around and headed for the stairs.

"To answer your question," I paused at the bottom of the stairs when he shouted that from the other room; "He does talk about them a little. He says Bella is planning to go to culinary school after graduation. Maybe you could join her?" He was still taunting me with the Bella shit, so I ignored whatever else he said and headed up to my room. I flopped down on my bed, needing some sort of sleep since I haven't gotten much lately.

_I was in a room I had never seen, it was dark and cold. I fumbled my way through the boxes and bins, to a little door in the corner__, only big enough to be a crawl space. I was out of breath and my heart was racing with anticipation, I was fearful, but elated at the same time. My hand rested on the doorknob and I froze. What was I going to find on the other side of that door?_

I woke up, as a bang came slamming down on my door.

"Little bro, it's time for dinner," Emmett's booming voice sounded through the door.

"I was trying to sleep, you ass," I shouted back, rubbing my eyes.

"Oh, were you dreaming about Bella?" I could hear his snicker through the door.

"Fuck off," I yelled even louder.

"You know I'm just giving you a hard time." He said. "Now get your ass down stairs, it's time to eat and I'm not waiting for you."

I crawled off the bed and headed down the stairs with that dream still fresh in my head. If it was even a dream, it was weird.

"Edward, honey, what's wrong?" my mom asked at the table. "You haven't touched your dinner."

"Edward has a crush on a girl named Bella." Emmett explained, with a teasing smile on his face.

"Will you shut up, I do not." I shouted across the table at him, throwing my fork down on my plate. "God, Emmett, sometimes you act like a fucking twelve year old."

"Hey," my dad looked up at me, with anger in his eyes. "Watch the language."

"Whatever, I'm going out." I got up from my chair and headed out the front door.

I headed over to Jasper's house; he would be able to help me. I knocked on the door and without spoken words, Jasper knew what I needed by the look on my face. He motioned for me to come in and went straight for his mom's liquor cabinet. He poured us both a shot of tequila and we downed it together. His mother, Maria was a single mom, she worked at the hospital as a nurse during the night; so she never caught Jasper drinking or having his sleepovers with Alice. I was surprised Alice wasn't here now. Six shots later I was perfectly content and passed out on Jasper's floor.

The next morning, I had the worst fucking hangover ever, but I had to go home. Jasper was still sleeping when I left. I was skipping school today for sure.

I drove home still groggy and feeling sick, crawled my way upstairs and went back to sleep.

A few hours later, there was a knock on the door and my dad walked in, looking rather pissed.

"So," he began, standing over my bed with his arms crossed against his chest. "Did you happen to know that your mother was up most of the night worried sick about you and then she had to go to work today, still not knowing where you were since you didn't show up at school and didn't answer your cell?"

"I left my phone here." I replied quietly. "I wasn't planning to leave so quickly." I kept my head buried in my pillow as I spoke as not to tip him off of my drinking.

"Where did you go?" He asked.

"I spent the night at Jasper's."

"And how much did you drink?" Fuck, how could he tell?

"Too much to go to school today." I replied vaguely. There was no use in lying to him, he could always see through me when I did.

"So, what was the purpose of drinking so much?" He sat down on the side of my bed waiting for me to reply. But I didn't. I don't know why Emmett's words had made me so mad. Maybe it was because I knew the lie about Bella going to culinary school was obviously another cover up. That whole family lies about everything, so who knows what's true.

"What's this, that Emmett was saying about some girl named Bella?" He asked, realizing I wasn't going to answer his question. So, instead he tried to figure out the root of it. "Isn't she Chief Hunter's daughter? And what happened to Jessica?"

I sighed heavily and sat up.

"Jessica and I broke up last week." I began. "Bella is just a girl at school that I've talked to a few times. I asked Emmett a question about James and he turned it around, to make it sound like I had a crush on her or something." Which I don't, I only wanted to know about James."

"What's with the sudden interest in the Chief of Police?"

"Nothing," I said, shaking my head.

"Alright," he said, slapping his hands on his knees. "I need to get back to the hospital, you need to take a shower and take some Tylenol, before your mother gets home."

'Okay," I breathed. He got up off the bed and headed for the door, but stopped and turned as he reached it.

"Oh and Edward, you're grounded for 2 weeks."

"What," I asked, with wide eyes.

"You heard me, and I better not find out about you drinking anymore alcohol."

"You can't be serious, I'm 18 you can't ground me," I shouted.

"My house, my rules; I don't care how old you are. You aren't old enough to drink, so I don't want to see it again." He opened the door and walked out, finalizing his decision.

I rolled my eyes and walked to my bathroom, slamming the door shut.

I took a long shower, trying to wash away the alcohol and my thoughts. I had come to another conclusion on Bella, and I didn't like it. But I was fairly certain this time, I was right. There was only one thing left for me to do now. I had to confront her and make her tell me the truth, no matter what.

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**So do you think he's figured it out this time? And will Bella actually be honest with him? You'll find out next chapter. If anyone has any questions please ask so I can be sure to address them in future chapters. Thanks for reading!!!!**


	7. Chapter 6

**This was a pretty easy chapter for me since this was my dream many years ago. The next chapter may take a few days to finish, RL calls so be patient. Thank you to everyone that reads and reviews, it means alot. And thanks to my M-12 girls for being so supportive and the best friends anyone could have. **

**Redlulu and bzeemomof4 thanks so much for being my beta's and helping with my story.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or it's characters, Stephenie Meyer does.**

* * *

**You Found Me: The Fray**

I found God  
On the corner of First and Amistad  
Where the west  
Was all but won  
All alone  
Smoking his last cigarette  
I said, "Where you been?"  
He said, "Ask anything".

Where were you  
When everything was falling apart?  
All my days  
Were spent by the telephone  
It never rang  
And all I needed was a call  
It never came  
To the corner of First and Amistad

Lost and insecure  
You found me, you found me  
Lyin' on the floor  
Surrounded, surrounded  
Why'd you have to wait?  
Where were you? Where were you?  
Just a little late  
You found me, you found me

In the end  
Everyone ends up alone  
Losing her  
The only one who's ever known  
Who I am  
Who I'm not, who I wanna be  
No way to know  
How long she will be next to me

Lost and insecure  
You found me, you found me  
Lyin' on the floor  
Surrounded, surrounded  
Why'd you have to wait?  
Where were you? Where were you?  
Just a little late  
You found me, you found me

Early morning  
The city breaks  
I've been callin'  
For years and years and years and years  
And you never left me no messages  
Ya never send me no letters  
You got some kinda nerve  
Taking all I want

Lost and insecure  
You found me, you found me  
Lyin' on the floor  
Where were you? Where were you?  
Lost and insecure  
You found me, you found me  
Lyin' on the floor  
Surrounded, surrounded  
Why'd you have to wait?  
Where were you? Where were you?  
Just a little late  
You found me, you found me  
Why'd you have to wait?  
To find me, to find me

**BPOV**

The moment I saw James, I knew I was in trouble. Leah was lying on the floor in a fetal position, he had obviously hit her. Seth was rocking back and forth on the couch, with his knees pulled closely to his chest.

The next thing I felt was James pulling my hair and slamming the back of my head against the wall. I closed my eyes and gritted my teeth.

"You think, just because I'm gone, you can do whatever the hell you want?" He spit in my face. "Do you not remember what happened to your fucking mother when she started pulling this shit?"

"I'm sorry, I wasn't doing anything." I cried out. He threw me across the room and I hit the railing of the stairs with my side.

"You have Seth and Leah lying for you about where you were." He said threw gritted teeth. "I had to punish them for their disobedience, you realize that right? Your stupidity forced my hand."

All I could do was lay there and hold back the tears. I knew I had made a mistake. I knew it was my fault.

"When Garrett called and started asking me all kinds of questions about why my beautiful daughter wasn't going to the dance and why boys weren't lining up at her door, and why she seemed so sad and quiet all the time, I got suspicious about just how much you were sharing with my deputy. So, I left my training early to see for myself. What a surprise when I find you gone when I get home." He hovered over my shaking body. "I don't have to let you live here Bella, you were never my responsibility, and your dumb mother left you here for me to deal with. I let you stay to help you out, I expect you to show me some respect and gratitude; by doing as you are told if you want to continue living here."

"I know, I'm sorry," I cried out.

"Is that where you were?" He asked in a calmer voice. "Were you at that fucking dance with some boy?"

"No." I said, with a shaky voice.

"Then where the hell were you?"

I knew I had to come up with something, and quick. I wasn't quick enough though because he yanked me up by my arm and slammed me up against the wall, pushing his forearm into my neck. I shut my eyes trying to hide the pain.

"I asked you a question." He said through gritted teeth.

"I had an assignment to get done." I said hastily. "It's a group project. I had to meet the group at Alice's house."

Then there was a light tap on the door. I sucked in a breath as James eyes darted to the door then back to me. He let go of me and walked slowly to the door running his hands through his hair a couple times.

"What is it I can do for you son?" I heard him say from the other room. My heart sank, I knew it was Edward. Not only had he hurt Leah and Seth, now I didn't know what he would do to Edward.

I began straightening my clothes and hair and wiped my tears away.

"Bella," he called.

I walked slowly around the corner, scared to death what would happen if I got caught; that I had lied. I prayed Edward would leave quickly without saying anything about where we were.

"You forgot this." He smiled at me and reached out his hand with my coat.

I reached out slowly to take it and brushed my hand up against his hoping he would understand the gesture. "Thank you, Edward," I said. "Alice shouldn't have sent you all the way over here to bring it to me. I could have gotten it on Monday." I looked intensely in his eyes hoping he would understand.

"She was worried you might not have anything else to wear." He half smiled, and I let out a silent sigh of relief.

"Can you thank her for me?" I asked. "And I promise I'll get my part of the history assignment done." If Edward got that last part and followed along then maybe all this would be over. James would believe him.

"Yeah, it should be a fun project to do." He had questioning eyes but he didn't let on to James that anything was odd.

"So, you must be Edward Cullen, Emmett Cullen's little brother?" James asked him, I stiffened.

"Yes, sir," he replied looking almost frightened by him.

"And what is this project you're working on?" Oh no, I hadn't revealed that part. I had to cut in.

"I told you, James, it's a project on the civil war that we have to do as a group. It's me, Alice, Jasper, and Edward."

"I asked him, Bella," James was mad that I had done that. I was sure I would get in trouble for that.

"Um, well sir, it's like Bella said, we have a project on the Civil War that we have to complete by next Friday." For once I was thankful that Edward paid too much attention to everything. "We were over at Alice's house, going over ideas and deciding who would do what. We didn't have a chance to get together on Friday because of the game, so we had to do it tonight. It's a good portion of our grade, so we want it to be good."

"Hmm," James was buying it. He turned around and told Leah and Seth to go to bed. My body eased extremely knowing that meant that he wasn't going to hurt them anymore.

While James was telling them to go to bed, I looked up at Edward and he mouthed the words "are you alright?" I nodded and closed my eyes holding back the tears.

"Bella, say goodnight, it's time for bed." James voice startled me and I jerked slightly when he said my name.

"Goodnight, Edward, thanks for bringing my coat to me." I said, silently thanking him for so much more.

"Goodnight Bella." I could see the concern in his eyes when he said that so, I gave him a slight smile to reassure him that everything was okay.

I headed towards the stairs hoping James wouldn't ask him any more questions, but he did. I prayed that Edward wouldn't say anything not only for my sake but mostly for him. I went to my bed and sat in the middle of it, waiting for whatever was next. I didn't know if James had bought my story about the project or if he was done beating me. I wanted to check on Leah, I knew he hurt her and I wasn't sure if he did anything to Seth or not.

A few minutes later my door slammed open and James stood there glaring at me.

"So, this Edward kid," he began. "Why was he here?"

"It's like he said, I left my coat at Alice's house." I replied in a quiet voice.

"Well, from now on, any projects that you are working on get done at school." His eyes were dark with anger as he walked the short distance to my bed. "I never gave you permission to go to someone's house."

"I know, I'm sorry," I said nervously.

"I'm not real pleased with your choices, Bella." He said standing over my bed. "I don't like having to come home from an important training because I can't trust you. Your mother suffered the consequences from her mistakes; I'd hate to see what could happen to Edward if he got involved. I'm sure you don't want to suffer from any consequences either."

"No, sir," I whispered. The next thing I felt was the back of his hand hitting the side of my face.

"Thanks to you, I have to drive all night back to Seattle for the last day of this training." He yelled. "I will be home at 6pm, I expect the house to be cleaned and dinner made. And you better not leave this house for any reason while I'm gone."

"Yes, sir," I said. I had tears streaming down my face and I tried to hide it with my hair.

He walked back to the door to leave. "And get rid of all that crap Garrett has been feeding you."

As soon as he left the room, I ran to the window to watch him to leave. As the car pulled out of the garage and headed down the street I ran down the hall to check on Seth and Leah. I peeked into Seth's room, he was curled up in a ball and sleeping soundly. I went to Leah's room next and opened the door lightly, she was lying on her bed and I could hear soft whimpers coming from her. I opened the door wider letting in a stream of light from the hallway and at first I could hear her gasp, probably thinking that I was James. When she realized it was me she leaped off her bed and ran to my arms and sobbed into my chest.

"I didn't tell him, Bella," she said, through whimpers. "I didn't tell him where you were."

"I know," I said, brushing her hair with my hands. "But you should have, Leah. He wouldn't have hurt you if you would have told him."

She straightened and looked up at me. "How can you say that? I could never do that to you. I would never intentionally do anything to get you in trouble."

"It's better me than you." I replied. "All of this was my fault; I should have never let Edward talk me into going to dinner. It only caused more problems for everyone. Now he's even lying for me."

"No, you deserve to do something for yourself, even if it is behind his back. She said, laying her head back on my chest and tightening her grip around my waist. "You do everything for us and have never once done anything for you and I'm not going to take that one night of freedom you had away."

"Thank you, for thinking of me." Leah and I may not have always agreed on everything and we got in a lot of arguments, but I knew she would do anything for me, and I would do the same for her.

"What did he do, while I was gone?" I wasn't sure if I wanted to know, but I needed to know what to expect with him.

Leah pulled away from me and went back to sit on her bed, and I followed sitting at the end. "He came in, and saw Seth and me sitting on the couch, watching TV and yelled at us to turn it off. Then he asked where you were and neither one of us would say, so he grabbed Seth by the arms and shook him until he cried, demanding that we tell him where you were. I tried to pull him off of him, but he shoved me out of the way and I hit the table. The lamp fell and he got mad at me for breaking it. Then he slapped me and grabbed my wrists squeezing them so hard, and yelling at me to tell him where you were. I wouldn't say anything and he got even more upset and pushed me to the ground. That's when we heard you come through the door."

"Are you okay?" My blood was boiling at that moment. It was one thing for him to hurt me, but now Leah and even Seth. He never hurt them like this before.

"I will be, my back hurts a little from hitting the table, but I'll be okay."

"Let me go get you an icepack, I need one for my face too." I stood off the bed and headed down stairs. I got 2 baggies and put a few ice cubes in each and wrapped them with a cloth and went back up stairs. When I went back to Leah's room she was gone, so I looked in my room and found Leah holding Seth close to her rubbing his back.

"He went running down the hallway to your room crying, so I followed him." Leah said.

I nodded my head and handed her the ice pack and scooped Seth up into my arms and laid on the bed, holding him close to me, rubbing his back and singing the song mom always sang to us when we were little. Leah curled up next to him, listening to the song also.

"Baby mine, don't you cry  
Baby mine, dry your eyes  
Rest your head close to my heart  
Never to part, baby of mine  
Little one when you play  
Don't you mind what you say  
Let those eyes sparkle and shine  
Never a tear, baby of mine  
If they knew sweet little you  
They'd end up loving you too  
All those same people who scold you  
What they'd give just for  
The right to hold you  
From your head to your toes  
You're not much, goodness knows  
But you're so precious to me  
Cute as can be, baby of mine"

Before I knew it, all three of us had fallen asleep for the night in my bed. When I woke in the morning at 5 am, not even needing my alarm clock, I pulled Seth out of my arms and slid him down next to Leah and went down stairs to get going on cleaning the house like James had asked. I had to make it look better than ever, in hopes that James wouldn't hurt us again when he got home. I got caught up on the laundry and all the dishes. I mopped all the floors, and washed the sideboards before Seth and Leah came down stairs. I made them a quick breakfast then, they both began helping me with cleaning the house.

We spent most of the day cleaning every little thing and around 4P.M. I began to prepare dinner. I decided to make roasted chicken with rosemary and lemon, and mashed potatoes, and peas. I had Seth and Leah both take a shower and have all their homework done, before he got home.

Just as he got home, I placed the food on the table hoping and praying we had done a sufficient enough job, so he wouldn't be mad when he got home. I suspected that he may be just for the fact of not getting any sleep the night before. But James never said a word to any of us, he ate and headed up stairs to shower and then went to bed. Leah and I washed the dishes; while Seth cleared the table, then we all went to our rooms for the night.

The next morning when we left for school, James was still asleep, so I didn't bother him.

Walking to school, I was worried about how I was going to explain what happened that night to Edward. I knew he was going to ask and it made me nervous thinking of what he may have heard or thought. But I was surprised when he didn't come to school and neither had Jasper.

I asked Alice where Jasper was, thinking maybe she would say he was with Edward.

"I called him this morning and he's hung over really bad." Alice explained. "I guess Edward came over last night in a really bad mood so they did some shots and passed out on his floor. Edward was gone when he woke up, so he figured he went home to sleep."

"Are they okay?" I asked.

"Yeah they'll be fine; they just need to sleep it off." She said.

"That's good," I said with a sigh.

Alice looked at me with a smile. "I knew it."

"Knew what?" I questioned.

"Edward was with you on Saturday night, wasn't he?" She asked.

"Why would you say that?" I looked away to hide the blush on my face. How did she know?

"You are concerned about where he is today, even though you are avoiding asking me about him directly, so you ask me about Jasper." She began. "Edward called Jasper Saturday night, saying he was sick and wasn't coming to the dance, but then shows up at Jasper's house the following night to get plastered? If I was sick, I wouldn't be drinking the following night. So, what happened, why was he so upset that he needed to get drunk?"

I had to lie to her about being with him on Saturday, she was the biggest gossiper at the school and if I said I was with him it would get back to James.

"Alice, I seriously don't know what you're talking about, I haven't seen him since last week."

"Okay, if you say so," she said with a shrug of her shoulders. "But Bella, just so you know, you are a terrible liar." She looked at me with a smirk and I looked at her with wide eyes and a gasp.

"Alice...."

"Don't worry, I won't tell a soul, but you have to tell me what happened." She said, jumping up and down with excitement.

I told her about how he showed up at my house and how we went to this little Italian restaurant that he said was his favorite. She was so excited and happy for me and I wanted to share her happiness but I didn't tell her about how I told him we couldn't be friends and he accepted it. It made me sad knowing that the most amazing night I had ever had would never happen again.

That night when James got home again he ignored us, ate, showered, then went out until 11, then went to bed when he returned. I would rather have him ignoring us then hitting us though, so I wasn't too concerned by it.

The following day, I had completely forgot about the weekend until I was at my locker during lunch getting my book I read every day, but when I turned around, Edward stood inches away from me, staring down at me with determination on his face. My heart started beating increasingly fast and I could feel my face heating up.

I diverted my eyes to the floor and took a deep breath.

"You need to come with me." He said, placing his hand at the small of my back to guide me down the hall.

"Where are we going?" I asked, in a rushed voice as I tried to keep up with him.

"I'm taking you to talk to my dad." I stopped and pulled away from him, feeling panic rush through my body. I shook my head and tears filled my eyes.

"Bella, please," He begged. "You won't talk to me, so maybe you'll talk to a doctor."

"I can't," I said. "Edward, please just let it go." I started walking away from him.

"You know, with everything I have pieced together the last few days," He shouted at me as I walked away. "I think I have enough to go on to talk to my brother and issue a concern."

I stopped suddenly and turned back to him begging him with the expression on my face not to. He walked toward me and gently grabbed my hand, pulling me down the hall towards the gym. Once we were in the empty gym room we walked up the stairs at the back of the bleachers and into a small storage area that I had never seen before. He pulled up a box for me to sit on and he sat on another one in front of me.

Neither of us talked for a few minutes, I avoided looking at his eyes and instead looked around the darkened room, with only a small amount of light coming through the window in the door. It was musty smelling and hazy from the dust.

Edward rummaged through his bag and pulled out a sandwich and a coke.

"Here," he said handing me half the sandwich.

I looked up at him briefly and took the sandwich from him. "What is this for?" I asked.

"You don't ever eat, and you need to." He said, taking a bite from the other half.

I took a bite of the sandwich slowly.

"Your dad hurts you, doesn't he?" he asked abruptly.

My panicked eyes darted to his and he didn't have to wait for an answer. The expression on my face said it all.

"Bella please, just talk to me." He reached out his hand to mine and looked intently into my eyes.

"What do you want to know?" I asked. I couldn't hide it from him anymore. He knew too much, and really, I didn't want to keep it from him. I wanted him to know.

"How long has he been hitting you?" He asked.

"About 3 years," I answered. "But before that he used to hurt my mom."

"Does he hit Leah and Seth too?" He put the sandwich down and held both of my hands, rubbing the back with his thumbs, while I talked, telling him everything that I had never told another soul besides my own family.

"No, he doesn't hit Seth and Leah; at least he hadn't until Saturday night."

"What happened Saturday?"

"When he got home and I wasn't there, he started hurting them to get them to tell him where I was."

"And what did he do to you, when you got there?" He asked.

"The same thing, until you showed up."

"So, it was my fault." His voice was thick with regret.

"No, Edward, it's not your fault, it was mine, I knew better. I shouldn't have gone in the first place. But I don't regret it. It was worth it."

"Going out with me was worth being beat?" He asked, with questioning eyes.

"I didn't mean it that way; I just meant I was glad I went with you. I enjoyed it."

"Will you tell me about your mother?" He asked. "What really happened?"

I took a deep breath before I began. "James had everyone in town convinced that she was crazy and that she didn't know what she was talking about. But then, when she started going to the police and neighbors telling them that he was hurting us, he locked her in the basement and beat her for days and told everyone that he finally sent her to a psychiatrist facility in Seattle, to get help. The next thing I knew I'm at her funeral and he had told everyone that she committed suicide. No one questioned him; he was the chief of police, with this perfect family, except for his wife who had recently gone crazy." I was crying hard, remembering that time in my life. Finally, telling someone the truth was weightlifting. I was terrified of what he might do or say, now that I had pretty much told him everything, but I didn't care. I felt like I had to tell him, like my mind wasn't protecting itself anymore. Edward had broke through and found me. He made me feel happy and free.

He reached out and pulled me into his arms as I cried into his shoulder. It was the most peaceful gesture I had ever felt from anyone. I felt like I was home and safe in his arms.

"Bella," he breathed. "Why didn't you ever tell anyone?"

"I can't," I pulled away from him wiping my face. "He would do the same thing, he would convince everyone that I'm crazy just like my mom was and then he'll hurt Leah and Seth."

"You can't live like that forever, Bella. We can go to my brother; he'll believe you and he can help us."

"No, you can't say anything. Not to anyone. He works for James and he's close to him."

"I can't stand by knowing this and not do something." I could hear the frustration in his voice.

"If you do, I'll lie about it and tell them it's not true."

"Bella..."

"Please, Edward, I'm begging you, don't say anything to anyone. I can't risk my family."

He sighed heavily and ran his hands through his hair nervously.

"If you want me to keep it a secret, then why are you telling me all of this?"

"I don't know," I said. "You won't let it go and you keep pushing mostly. But when I'm with you… I feel safe and protected, like I did with my mom. She was always home to me, even through all the bad stuff, she was home, and I didn't have to worry when I was with her. That's how I feel when I'm with you." He seemed to ignore my sentiment but I didn't blame him.

"And what am I supposed to do if all of a sudden you don't show up at school?"

"That won't happen; I know how to handle it." I tried to control my voice and show that I was capable of dealing with this.

"What can I do?" He asked.

"Nothing just let it go, pretend like I never said anything and go on with your life."

"How can you ask me to do that now?"

"It's the only option, Edward. I can't risk something happening to you too."

"What do you mean something happening to me?"

"If he knows that we're getting close, then he'll do something to you to stop it. He already threatened it. I don't know what, but he'll do something if he finds out."

He stood up and started pacing in the small space, running his fingers through his hair and pulling it. I watched, waiting for him to say something.

"I think we should get to class." He said, in a rushed tone, picking up the remains of our uneaten lunch and his backpack. I stood up and followed him out of the room. He walked towards his class, never looking back at me, even while we were in the hallway. I knew it was what I told him to do, but I was surprised by the hurt I felt when he actually did it.


	8. Chapter 7

I got this chapter out a little sooner than I thought I would, hope you all enjoy. So I have to thank Kaymay for helping me come up with a last name for James, Seth, and Leah from last chapter, and Pinky for helping me with the ending part of this chapter. And as always Bzeemomof4 and Redlulu for doing all the editing.

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or its characters Stephenie Meyer does.

* * *

**Cinnamon: Ron Pope**

Stale sweat and cinnamon  
I guess she is frightened most of all  
Loves to fly but she's scared to fall

She's got scars on the outside  
Says they're the worst kind,  
And I don't ask  
She turns the lights out and locks the door

If this is fate count me out  
And never try  
Please never try to hold her down

Broken home  
Broken bones  
She never told anyone but me  
And everything seemed make believe

We both ran  
You can't ever catch horizon  
Guess that's why we've both been riding so damn long  
She says she thinks of me as home

If this is fate count me out  
And never try  
Please never try to hold her down

Hands on hips and lips to lips  
I don't know how much someone could take from her

Fourth of July  
Watch the night sky  
I'm wondering why the truth ain't so easy this time

**EPOV**

I got out of that room as fast as I could. Bella had pretty much just told me that James, the police of chief, who everyone in our small town trusted, had killed her mother. She didn't give details about what happened but that is what I got from what she told me. And, then on top of that, she told me that James had threatened that something may happen to me. What was I doing getting involved in this shit? I couldn't be a part of it, I had to get it out of my mind and let it go like Bella had said I should. It was the only option she said and she was right. I had school, and football, and college to think about, I couldn't get wrapped up trying to help her. I barely knew her really and she asked me to not say anything to anyone. I still felt like I should, I could go to the school counselor or the Principal and let them know of my concern. But like she said, she would lie about it, so what good was it going to do? It would probably make things worse for her and her brother and sister, let alone me. So I decided to do as she asked and kept my mouth shut and ignored her.

I knew it was wrong, I knew I should have taken a stand and did something but what could I possibly do? For the rest of the week, I sat with the guys from the football team, instead of her, Jasper and Alice. Jasper questioned me about it, but I evaded the question and told him I was trying to focus on football right now and it helped to be with the guys.

Every glance I took in Bella's direction was torture, she looked even more sad now then she had ever looked before and I couldn't help but wonder if he was still hurting her because of me. I wanted to help her, I wanted to take her away and hide her somewhere safe away from that asshole. But I had caused her this pain to begin with and I didn't want to cause more. Plus, I was a little selfish and didn't want to screw up any chance I might have of getting into college and getting a football scholarship. If James did something, as a warning, like plant drugs, or accuse me of some crime and put me in jail that would screw my future up really bad.

Coach had called me into his office on Thursday, after practice to ask if I was ready for the game.

"If you aren't ready, then I'll need to put Felix in to replace you." Coach said, looking at me over the rim of his reading glasses.

"I'll be ready, coach."

"Are you sure, because we can't lose another game and I've heard that scouts have come to check you out. It's very odd that scouts from some of the top colleges would come here, to our small school, but they want to see you."

Great, even more pressure.

"I'll be fine." I lied.

"Well, let's hope so," he looked back at the playbook at his desk. "You have done terrible at practice the last few days and last week's game, even though we only lost by a little, it was humiliating. Your teammates had to carry the blunt of the game because you were somewhere else."

"I know, I'm sorry coach," I said, dropping my head in shame. I had never been unprepared for a game and this was big if scouts were coming to check me out. I couldn't let my teammates do all the work. It won't happen again.

"Would you mind telling me what has got you so distracted?" He leaned back in his chair playing with a pen in his hand.

"It's personal reasons." I replied.

"Alright, I won't pry but I'm going to have Felix ready to take your spot if you screw it up, so you better figure out whatever it is that has you confused and be prepared." He sat back up and went back to studying the play book on his desk.

"I will, thanks coach." I got up and left his office, heading back to the locker room.

"Hey Edward, do you want to go get some food with me and some of the guys?" Jasper asked.

"I can't, I'm grounded." I answered, sitting down on the bench, rubbing my face with the palms of my hands.

"You're grounded? How did that happen?" He asked, looking at me remorsefully.

"Jazz, it's not your fault. I made the decision to drink and skip school. It's not like you forced me to."

"Well, sorry anyway." He said, sincerely. "So, are you going to tell me what is going on?"

"Nothing, I'm fine." I stood up abruptly and started gathering my stuff from my locker.

"Well, what's going on with Bella? Alice is pretty pissed at you. She's been really sad lately and Alice doesn't know what to do to help her."

"Bella's been upset?" I asked, turning to face him.

"Yeah, she won't talk about it with Alice but Alice can tell. What happened between you too?"

"Nothing," I turned back around, staring at my empty locker."

"Don't give me that shit, I know something went down." Jazz said, with a smirk on his face.

I slammed the locker and turned towards him. "Nothing happened, and nothing will, got it." I nearly shouted at him.

"Okay, sorry." He backed up and put his hands out in defense.

I sighed heavily and walked past him, slamming my hand up against the door to leave. On the drive home, I was very distracted and almost wanted to go by Bella's house, to see if she was okay. But what would I say? And what if her dad was there? How would I explain that? I could just drive past her house, knowing that more than likely I wouldn't find anything out just by driving by, but it would make me feel better. Just as I decided to do just that and turned in that direction, I saw the flashing lights in my rear view mirror. Shit.

I watched James pull up behind me as I pulled over. He got out real slow then walked even slower to my car. I rolled down the window, with my heart beating so fast and my breath erratic. I took a deep breath trying to calm down. He wouldn't do anything, I tried to tell myself.

"So, Edward Cullen we meet again." He said, smugly.

"Hello, sir." I said, as calm as possible.

"So where are you headed so fast?"

"I'm just going home from practice."

"Funny, I thought your home was that way." He tilted his head towards the other direction and gave me a questioning look.

I had to lie, who else did I know that lived on that side of town? "I needed to stop off and pick up some school council stuff from Angela Webber. She lives over on Tinker Street."

"I see," he said.

"She's the school secretary and I'm president, so she has some paperwork for me." I added, to make it sound more believable.

"Well, you must be in quite the hurry to see this Angela girl at the speed you were going." I had to admit I wasn't paying much attention to how fast I was going, but I didn't think I was going that fast.

"Sorry, I guess I was thinking about the game coming up this weekend."

He took out his ticket pad and asked for my information, which I handed him. He began writing on the ticket pad and I couldn't believe he was planning to give me a ticket. I had never been pulled over before, didn't you usually get a warning first?

"So, how is that project you and Bella are working on?" He asked, still scribbling something on the ticket.

"It's going fine; we should be done by Friday."

"So, how do you find time to do a project like that plus football practice and school council?" He asked.

"I just do it sir, I don't have much choice."

"But it must be hard, keeping up with all of that, no wonder your girlfriend broke up with you."

I wasn't stupid; I knew what he was getting at. He wanted to make sure I wasn't on my way to see Bella for one and to be sure I wasn't looking for a new girlfriend especially not Bella.

"That's probably part of the reason, I'm sure." I replied. "It's a good thing anyway, since in another year I'll be going off to college and I don't want a clingy girlfriend to have to deal with."

He smirked at me and raised an eyebrow. I fisted my hand as hard as I could and clenched my teeth restraining myself from punching his smug face. I didn't know how he lived with what he did to Bella. I wanted to kill him.

"Well Edward, I think I can just give you a warning this time but be sure to drive the speed limit." He handed my information back to me and stuck the ticket pad back in his pocket.

Thanks, sir and I will."

He turned and walked back to his car and I glared at him through the rear view mirror the whole way. I knew he couldn't see me or that it would even matter, but it made me feel better. I knew he would be watching me leave and maybe even following me, so I took out my cell phone and called Angela, to let her know I was coming over to talk about some council stuff. She sounded surprised, since I had never done that before and I myself had no idea what I was going to talk to her about. So when I showed up, I decided to just ask her how she was and if there was anything I should be aware of for our next meeting. I'm sure she was suspicious about why I was there but I had to cover my tracks. I only stayed for a couple minutes but I found myself searching all over for any sign of that cop car.

Once I headed home, I made sure I stayed within the speed limit and stayed clear from Bella's house. As long as she was at school every day, I knew she was okay and I didn't need to worry. She had lived with him for a good portion of her life, so I'm sure she knew how to handle it.

The next day, I was a wreck, not only was I worried about what James was doing, or whether Bella was okay or not but then I had to worry about this fucking game I had to play tonight and now there was a scout in the audience there to see me.

By the time game time came, I had relaxed a little but I hadn't talked to anyone all day. Not even Jasper. I knew I should have apologized for blowing up at him yesterday but I wasn't in the best mood, so I avoided everyone.

The first half of the game went okay, but I was still a mess and we were trailing by 2 touchdowns. When we ran back out, onto the field, I glanced up at the stands and I saw James sitting with my parents and Emmett, laughing and having a good time. The rage I felt at that moment was too much, and then I heard one of the players from the other team say something about this being "like a fucking scrimmage" and I lost it, the next thing I knew I attacked him and started punching him, while Jasper and Ben tried pulling me off of the kid. I tried fighting them off, but they wouldn't let go.

"Edward, what has gotten into you?" Jazz yelled, at me.

"Just let me go." I screamed out through gritted teeth.

Refs and coaches were all running to the scene on the field with whistles blowing and coaches screaming.

"You're out." One of the refs shouted.

"Get him out of here." Coach yelled.

Jasper and Ben grabbed my arms and started pulling me off the field. I glanced up to where my family was and James was watching me with that smug look on his face again. I hid my eyes and glared at the ground so wanting to glare back at him.

"What the hell was that?" Jasper asked, once back in the locker room.

"Nothing," I huffed, yanking my arms free from both of them and slammed my fist into the locker door.

"Whatever is going on, you need to get it worked out." Jazz said. Ben had left by now and I sat on the bench in the locker room trying to calm down.

Then I heard someone come into the locker room.

"Jasper, let me handle this." It was my mother and she looked very upset with me. Given the fact that she had come into the boy's locker room was enough to tell me that she meant business. Jasper headed back out the doors as my mom came closer.

"I have had enough of this behavior from you Edward and I want to know what's going on." She asked, with hands on her hips.

"Mom, I'm not in the mood to talk about this." I buried my head in my hands.

Her demeanor changed and she came and sat down next to me, rubbing my back like I was a little kid.

"Edward, your father and I are really worried about you and we only want to help." She said. "Does this have to do with your breakup with Jessica?"

"Why does everyone think this has to do with Jessica?" I stood and paced across the floor, leaning up against the lockers.

"If it's not Jessica, then what is it? Are you doing drugs?"

"No, mom," I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms across my chest.

"Then, what has you acting like this? You have never been like this. You aren't a confrontational type of person."

"I'm having a really bad week and I don't know what came over me." I began to relax a little and sat back down on the bench next to my mom.

"What is it that's causing your bad week?"

I sighed trying to figure out how I would discuss this with her without giving anything away. Truth was, I really needed to talk to someone; otherwise I felt like I might explode. I ran my hands through my hair preparing myself.

"What do you do if you know someone is in trouble but there isn't anything you can do about it?" I spurted.

"Who's in trouble, Edward?" Esme asked, in real concern.

"I can't say mom."

"Well, how are they in trouble?"

I looked at her with wide eyes and she could tell I wasn't going to say.

"If someone is in trouble and you know, then you need to talk to someone to get them help."

"But, what if I do that and then they lie about it and it ends up causing more damage than good? And could cause problems for me too?"

"Edward, you know that whatever it is, your father and I will support you and keep you safe right?"

"Yeah, I know."

She sighed and put her hand on my arm. "Edward, let me tell you a little story about when I was a little girl."

"Mom…" I groaned.

"Just listen."

I placed my elbows on my knees and laid my chin in my hands.

"When I was 8 years old, there was this girl in my class named Bree, who had just moved to the area and we became instant friends. We played together every day and even after school sometimes, since we lived on the same block. But eventually she became distant and sad and didn't want to play with me anymore. I got really upset by it, because I thought she didn't like me. So one day, I asked her about it and she told me that her mom's new boyfriend hit her and was mean to her mom also. She begged me not to say anything, so I didn't; but later that same year, he had beat her so badly that she was in a coma and never woke up. The boyfriend was never charged, since no one knew what really happened; so her mother took full responsibility for it and went to jail for killing her daughter, when she wasn't the one that did it. I have never spoken of this with another person before now. Not even with your father.

"Why," I asked. It was uncanny the way her story mirrored mine, in so many ways.

"Guilt mostly," she said, in a regretful tone. "I could have done something to help her, to save her, but I didn't. And even after she died, I could have at least said what I knew to help her mom. But who was going to listen to an 8 year old kid?"

I saw a tear roll down her cheek when she said that.

"Did she have any siblings?" I wondered if maybe she was in the same situation as Bella.

"I believe she had a little brother that the boyfriend was the father of and after Bree's mother went to jail, the boyfriend took off taking the little boy with him."

She wiped the tears away and took in a sharp breath.

"I know whatever it is that is bothering you, is probably nothing like my story." She had no idea how similar things were actually. "But my point is, don't stand back and pretend like you don't know what's going on and like there isn't anything you can do, because someday you will regret it. I can promise you that."

I furrowed my eyebrows at that thought and I knew that if something ever happened to Bella or even Seth and Leah I would feel responsible, I would regret not doing anything. She trusted me enough to tell me the truth. She said that she felt safe with me, "like home" were her exact words. But what could I possibly do?

"Someone will listen and someone will help your friend with whatever it is that they are struggling with if you feel that they need help. And you can always come to me or your father with anything and we will help you in any way that we can."

I nodded my head and gave her a weak smile.

"I think you need to go home and get some rest, because you look like you haven't slept in days." She was so right on that account. I probably wouldn't sleep much anyway but I got changed and went home. I knew that coach was going to be mad at me and I didn't want to stick around for the end of the game to find out.

All weekend long I thought about what to do. Should I try to convince Bella to talk to someone or should I talk to someone myself about what I know? She said she would never tell anyone and if I did then she would lie about it. I had no idea what I was supposed to do. It was an unusually nice weekend with sunshine and clear skies, so I took advantage of the nice weather and decided to keep my mind busy by mowing the lawn for my dad, washing mine and mom's cars and cleaning my room. While cleaning out my closet, I found a box with some old pictures from grade school and middle school. I sat down on the floor, crossing my legs and started going through them. Among the pictures, were photos of me and Jasper as little boys, we'd been friends for way too long; there were pictures of me and Emmett and me and Jessica. I decided those ones could be tossed in the garbage, but there was also those class pictures you get from grade school, I looked at them and laughed at how ridiculous I looked back then, but then my eyes fell on Bella in every picture. In grade school, she always looked so happy and smiled so big, but by the time we were in 5th grade her smile was gone and she looked hollow, and lost. I grabbed my high school yearbooks off the shelf and found her picture in those as well and just the same lost, dead look on her face. In one candid picture, she had a cast on her arm. I remembered that freshman year when she came to school with a broken arm and she had told everyone that she fell down the stairs. Her eyes in those pictures haunted me, so I shoved the pictures back in the box, except for the ones of me and Jessica that went in the garbage can. I finished my room, I grabbed my IPod and went for a run. I ran through the woods as fast as I possibly could, losing myself in thought. The more I remembered back to middle school and high school, the more I remembered all the things that should have been noticed. In sophomore year, she came to school with a black eye and she said, she got kicked by a horse at a riding lesson. Last year, she was gone for almost a month and when she came back, she said that she was visiting her sick grandmother. Why hadn't anyone ever noticed? She said that her mom tried to talk to people about what was going on, even went to the police, but no one ever believed her. No one ever did anything when they should have and here I was doing the same thing as all of them. No wonder Bella didn't trust people or want to tell anyone. When her mother did say something she was killed. At least, that's what I think happened. She never gave details of what actually happened to her mother, so I wasn't sure; but knowing the little I did of James and what he has done to Bella, I was pretty sure he did kill her mom in some way. I didn't want to stand around and wait for him to do the same thing to Bella. Before I knew it, I had run so far that I ended up in a patch of woods behind Bella's house. I hadn't planned on running to her house but somehow, unconsciously maybe, I ended up at her house. I snuck up as close as I could to find out if she was there or if anyone was there and I saw James in the backyard mowing, I looked up at the windows and could see her sitting by her window reading her book, I stifled a laugh, she always had that book. I turned around and started my way back home; keeping in mind the path I took for future reference.

After dinner that night, I went to my room to read, since I really had nothing better to do and because I wanted to know what Bella found so interesting about her book, that she read it every day. I was deep into Pride and Prejudice when I heard a soft knock on my door.

"Come in." I sat up on my bed, putting the book down on the night stand.

Emmett walked in slowly. I didn't even realize that it was a Sunday and he hadn't been here all day like he usually was. I hadn't seen or talked to him since last Sunday when I blew up at him and took off.

"Hey," he said, nervously.

"Hi," I replied in a hushed tone.

"I brought you something." He reached out and handed me a plastic bag. I took the bag from him and looked inside. I smiled and looked up at him coyly.

"What is this," I asked trying not to laugh.

"Call it, a peace offering." He was smiling as well and walked over to sit on my bed.

I reached in the bag and pulled out a bag of black licorice. It was kind of an inside joke, since he thought black licorice was disgusting but I loved it and growing up he teased me about it all the time, so I stopped eating it because I didn't like him making fun of me.

"I wanted to apologize for last weekend, I should have realized you weren't in a good mood and what I said was probably going to make it worse." He hung his head. I don't know if I had ever seen him so upset. He was always so upbeat and happy, except for the time when he got kicked out of college.

"Emmett, don't worry about it. I was just having a bad day." I tried to make him understand that it wasn't him.

"It looks to me like you have been having a little more than just a bad day."

"I'm fine; at least I think I will be."

"Well, just know little brother, that I will always have your back."

"I know."

"I have something else for you too," He said with a huge smile on his face.

He pulled out a square shaped box from his coat pocket and handed it to me. I opened it up and saw Grandpa Cullen's pocket watch, that Emmett was given after he had died. It was silver and had the Cullen crest on the cover with my Grandmother's and Grandfather's names engraved in the back.

"Why are you giving me this? This was given to you." I asked, confused.

"I have so many things from Grandpa Cullen and you barely knew him when he died. I had planned to wait and give it to you when you graduated, but I thought now was a good time."

I ran my fingers across the crest, remembering how I used to look at it all the time when Emmett still lived at home.

"Thanks Emmett, this means a lot to me." I gave him an appreciative smile.

"You're welcome, little bro."

I didn't know what to say to this, it was such an important thing for him to give me and I was surprised that he even considered giving it to me at all.

"Well I have to go, I have a date tonight." He stood with a big grin on his face and walked towards the door.

"Oh really, is it someone I know" I raised my eyebrow at him.

"Perhaps," his smile grew even bigger.

"Well have fun," I said.

"I think I probably will. And Edward if you ever need to talk to anyone, you know I'm always available."

"I know thanks."

He left my room and headed back down stairs and once again my mind went to Bella. I was lucky to have such a strong family support system, but Bella had no one. I had to help her, to do something. And whatever it is that I will do, I knew, I would have my family to back me up.


	9. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or its charatcters Stephenie Meyer does.

Thanks to bzeemomof4 and redlulu for being such awesome beta's and cyber friends.

I'll address some things at the end of this chapter.

* * *

**Last Flight Out: Plus One**

I'm so scared that you will see  
All the weakness inside of me  
I'm so scared of letting go  
That the pain I've hid will show

I know you want to hear me speak  
But I'm afraid that if I start to  
I'll never stop

I want you to know  
You belong in my life  
I love the hope  
I see in your eyes  
For you I would fly  
At least I would try  
For you I'll take  
The last flight out

I'm afraid that  
You will leave  
As my secrets  
Have been revealed  
In my dreams  
You'll always stay  
Every breathing moment from now

I know you want to hear me speak  
But I'm afraid that if I start to  
I'll never stop

I want you to know  
You belong in my life  
I love the hope  
I see in your eyes  
For you I would fly  
At least I would try  
For you I'll take  
The last flight out

I cannot hold back  
The truth no more  
I let you wait too long  
Although it's hard and scares me so  
A life without you scares me more

I want you to know  
You belong in my life  
I love the hope  
I see in your eyes  
For you I would fly  
At least I would try  
For you I'll take  
The last flight out

**BPOV**

I woke up on Monday morning stiff and sore. James questioned me about how much Edward knew all weekend. Apparently some of the things he said when he got pulled over made James suspicious of what I had told him and then when he saw Edward attack someone during a football game and glare at him. That was another sign that he knew more than he should. I endured the slaps, the thrusts into the wall, and the kicks to the stomach when I fell to the ground, but I continued to tell him that I hadn't told him anything. After hours of questions and beatings, he helped me up off the ground and told me to get dinner started.

He went out to the garage while I made dinner and I held in the tears, so as not to scare Seth. Seth had been having nightmares almost nightly since what happened the night both Leah and I were beat. After James left for the night, like he always did, I took a hot bath soaking my aching body in the heat, then I went to bed dreading the next day. Sunday was more of the same, he still questioned me and tried to threaten me but I didn't say anything; I had to protect Edward, I didn't know what James was capable of with someone other than family and I didn't want to find out. By afternoon time, I think I had convinced him that Edward didn't know anything. He headed outside since it was such a nice day and mowed the lawn, which is what most of the neighborhood was doing.

I stayed in my room, doing my best to stay out of his way and I asked Seth and Leah to do the same. I sat by the window trying to get as much sunlight as I could while I attempted to read, but my mind wandered to Edward. I would be lying if I said I wasn't hurt by the way he left things the last time we talked. He hadn't talked to me at all for the rest of the week and very rarely ever made eye contact with me. I know I told him it was what was best and the only option, but part of me wished he would tell me everything would be okay and he would rescue us. But the truth was no one was coming to rescue us, no one would ever believe us or care enough to want to help. Even Edward Cullen, who figured it out on his own, didn't want to help us and I really couldn't blame him considering what could happen to him if he did.

By the time I arrived at school, I was so sore from the walk I wasn't sure if I would be able to make it through the day, but I fought through the pain and kept on with my day. After first period I was about to head to my next class, when Edward came up behind me telling me we needed to talk.

"Edward, please I can't talk to you. Just leave me alone." I said, in a rushed tone.

"He grabbed my arm, pulling me back and I could feel my face go white from the pain. I grimaced and clenched my teeth. As soon as he saw my face, he let go instantly.

"I'm sorry; I shouldn't have grabbed you like that." He said, his face turning the same shade of white as mine.

"It's okay."

"What did he do now?" He whispered.

"Nothing, I'm fine," I said.

"Edward, I've been looking everywhere for you." Jessica said, coming up from behind him, running her hand across his back up over his shoulder and onto his chest.

Edward stared at her dazed, for a second. I turned to walk away not even offering a goodbye, figuring I wouldn't be noticed anyway.

"What do you want Jessica?" I heard Edward say, as I walked away.

"I missed you and I want us to get back together." I heard Jessica say. Figures, this has been one of the longest breakups they've ever had. It was only a matter of time.

I went to class, and started working on the homework that was from last class with the few minutes I had before the bell rang. The less homework I had at night, the more I could get done around the house and the more sleep I got. My mind wasn't very far from Edward though. Part of me hoped that he would get back with Jessica, so then he would leave me alone but another part of me hurt really bad at the thought. I didn't understand why, I had no claim on him, we weren't together, we never were or would be. But it didn't stop me from wanting it to be that way.

At lunch, Alice and Jasper were unusually talkative and made me engage in their conversation, which was nice. Most of the time, I just sat there not saying a word while they had their own private conversations. It was only about 10 minutes into lunch, when I felt the warmth of his body sit down next to me. I turned and looked at him for a brief second and sat back, ducking my head to my chest.

"Are you sitting with us again?" Alice asked, in a sarcastic tone.

"Sure looks like it, doesn't it." He retorted.

"We were talking about Christmas," Jasper explained. "I know it's still a couple months away but Alice is giving me her list now, so I have plenty of time to get what she wants before the stores run out of everything.

"That's not why I'm telling you now." Alice said, slapping his arm playfully. They both laughed and played for a second.

Edward reached out his hand and offered me half of his sandwich, like he did before. I looked at up at him and took the sandwich without saying anything to him. I knew it was pointless to try and refuse.

Alice and Jasper kept the conversation going and had us all laughing with their banter about Christmas presents. When Alice offered us all a chocolate chip cookie that she had made, we all reached out to take one. But unfortunately I wasn't paying attention and my sleeve rode up on my arm a little, exposing the bruises that covered my arm. Edward reached over and pulled my sleeve up even more and I jerked back with a gasp.

"Bella, what the hell happened to you?" Alice asked, with her mouth agape.

"Nothing, I was just moving some stuff around and I got a bruise," I explained. "It's no big deal, really."

"That didn't look like "no big deal" Bella." Jasper said, with true concern in his voice. I looked at Edward for some sort of help but he just stared at me with a blank look on his face and it didn't appear that he was even breathing.

"Really, it's nothing." I countered. "I need to go; I'll talk to all of you later."

I held in the tears and ran to the bathroom collapsing against the wall. I felt like my world was crashing down on me. The more people noticed, the harder it was to hide it. I couldn't let people get suspicious because then James would find out. The tears fell freely for the first time all weekend long. The pain of the beating was unbearable. The hurt I felt when Edward had left me and not talked to me all week and now all of a sudden wants to talk to me again, washed over me. I couldn't handle his mood swings. I couldn't deal with him being this way. I wanted him to ignore me and stay away from me like he always did before. Why did Alice and Jasper have to convince him to ask me to that dance? Why did Seth and Leah insist I go with him to dinner? Why did he have to be so stubborn and not let it go? Why couldn't he go back to being with Jessica and just leave me alone? It was what was best, what he needed to do. But it wasn't what I wanted. I wanted him to want me, to care about me and want to be with me. But he wouldn't ever be that or want to be that.

I cried for a good 10 minutes before I pulled myself together. I walked to the sink and washed my face and fixed my hair. I took a deep breath and walked out of the bathroom, only to come face to face with Edward. He was leaning against the wall across from the door to the bathroom waiting for me. I instantly felt the tears well up again in my eyes, so I turned away from him and walked towards my locker. I quickly started turning the lock but my eyes were so blurred with tears, I couldn't see the numbers. I stopped my hands, dropped my bag on the floor, and leaned my head against the cool medal of the locker door.

I felt a hand slowly brush against my shoulder. "Bella," Edward whispered.

I turned around in a quick jolt and wrapped my arms around his neck. I wanted to feel the comfort of his arms around me, to make me feel better and safe once again. He wrapped his arms around my waist tightly and pulled me close to him. Once in his arms, everything that I had felt, all the pain, the hurt, the confusion, the worry, the fear, the disbelief, it all disappeared. I didn't want him to ever let me go. As screwed up as it may have sounded, he brought a calming affect over me and I felt safe. I buried my head in his chest, as he rubbed circles over my back.

"Edward," I vaguely heard Alice say. "What happened?"

"Nothing, she'll be okay." Edward answered. "I'll take care of her."

I hadn't realized that the halls were filling up with people, until I finally pulled away from him. I had soaked his shirt with tears and I felt really guilty about it but he didn't seem to notice or care. He picked up my backpack and linked one arm around my waist supporting most of my weight, while we made our way down the hall.

He guided me into the office, where Ms. Cope sat at the front desk.

"Hi, Edward," she said, before taking in my disheveled form in the crook of Edwards arm. "Oh, what happened?"

She stood from her seat and came around to the front of the desk.

"Bella's not feeling well Ms. Cope," Edward informed her. "Would it be okay if I took her home, she usually walks and I don't think it would be good for her to walk in this weather." It had begun raining again that morning.

"What about your classes Edward?" She asked. "You've been missing a lot of school lately."

"I can make it up, I promise." He said.

"I could just call her dad to come and get her." I felt Edwards hold on me tighten at the mention of James coming to get me.

"Ms. Cope, I would hate to have to call him away from his job." Edward said, in a calm voice. "I can get her home safe and there won't be any reason to bother the chief."

She looked over at me once again, taking in my appearance. "Alright, get her home but you better be back first thing in the morning. I'm not going to keep giving you these passes to get out of class. Someone is going to catch on."

"I know Ms. Cope, but you know I appreciate it when you do."

"Well, I appreciate you keeping your mouth shut."

I felt Edward, chuckle a little under his breath before we turned and he guided me out to the parking lot. Once we were outside, I realized what had just happened. Edward was planning to take me home. Did he not understand what I had told him? James had already stopped him once; did he not think it wouldn't happen again? He was probably on the side of the road waiting for him to drive by as it was.

"Edward, I can't go with you." I said, pulling away from him. "James is probably waiting for you to drive by."

"Relax Bella, there is more than one way to get to my house and I drove my dad's car today." He pulled me into the nook of his arm once again and walked me to his dad's car. He helped me into the seat and ran to the driver's side. Once we were on the road again, I realized what he had said. He said "my house," referring to his house.

"Edward, you have to take me home." I shrieked.

"I will." he looked over at me nodding his head. "First, I'm taking you to my house to feed you and talk about some things."

"I'm not saying anything to your dad, if that's what you were planning." I exclaimed.

"My dad's not home, it'll just be us," he explained.

I sighed in relief, knowing this wasn't some ploy to get me to talk.

"Why do you have your dad's car?" I asked.

"He's going to take mine in to get new tires after work, so we traded for the day."

"I see." I wondered if he had this planned or if it was some sort of trick.

He took a long way around, and we ended up on a gravel road that led to the back of his house. Once we pulled up, I was in awe of this huge house that stood before me. It was beautiful, with lots of windows overlooking the mountains; it was painted a rich chocolate color. He stood at my door for a few seconds, waiting for me to get out but I was so drawn to this breathtaking house that I hadn't even noticed him standing there.

"Bella," he asked. "Are you going to get out or did you want me to carry you?"

"Sorry," I said, taking his hand to help me out of the car.

We walked inside and I was instantly surrounded by warmth, comfort, and love. It was the strangest thing, even though I had never been here, I felt comfortable. The walls were painted with warm colors and the furniture looked shiny and clean, like it was brand new. There were chandeliers hanging from the ceiling with hardwood floors.

"Your house is beautiful," I said.

"Thanks. It's kind of a hobby of my mom's. She likes to decorate." He helped me with my coat and placed it by the door.

"She's good at it." I complimented.

"Would you like something to drink or eat?" He asked.

"Whatever you have is fine," I answered.

"Make yourself comfortable, I'll be right back." He gestured to the living room that was off of the entryway, before walking down the hall.

I walked towards the room pausing right before I entered, not sure if I should take my shoes off first or not. Wasn't that what rich people did? I decided to do it anyway whether I needed to or not just because it had been raining and I was sure my shoes were probably dirty. I walked over to a shelf that had lots of books and pictures displayed. There were school photos of Edward and his brother Emmett. I assumed it was Emmett anyway; I had never actually met him. My eyes scanned over the titles of the books, and then I glanced around the room eyeing a large grand piano, sitting near floor to ceiling windows. I walked over to it and ran my hand across the keys. I always wanted to learn how to play but obviously that never happened.

"Do you play?" I was so startled by him finding me touching stuff in his house, that I jumped and let out a small shriek. He stifled a laugh and sat two bowls filled with tomato soup down on the coffee table, then pulled two sodas out of his pockets.

He sat down on the couch and motioned for me to sit with him. I did and reached for the bowl of hot soup. It felt good on this cold day. We ate in silence and once we were done he took the dishes to the kitchen. When he got back he sat down next to me on the couch with a serious look on his face.

"Bella," he began. "I know you don't want to talk to anyone about what is happening and that you think it won't do any good and I know you have no hope that someone would ever want to help. But I want to prove to you that it's not true."

"Edward, I can't tell anyone, you have no idea what he's capable of."

"I don't care what he's capable of, there are people who can help you and who will do something."

"Like who?" I said, in disbelief. "My mom tried to get us help and people laughed in her face."

"I'm not laughing, and I'm here to help."

I looked at him, confused by his words. Did he mean he was planning to tell someone? "Edward, if you tell anyone, I will lie about it and if James even gets wind of it, he will come after you."

"I know you plan to lie if it comes to that, even though I think it's stupid, I'm respecting your wish to not tell anyone. I can't promise you that I won't ever tell someone, but I can promise you that as long as you need someone to confide in, or lean on, or whatever it is you need, you have it. I'll be here for you no matter what, as long as you need me."

His words were the most comforting words I had ever heard spoken, but I knew I could never let him do that.

"Edward, he's already suspicious of you, I can't ask you to get more involved."

"I already am, Bella, don't you see that? I can't turn my back and pretend like nothing is going on."

"What is it you are planning to do?"

"For one, I want you to talk to me, to tell me everything. I'm going to start writing everything down that happens. If you or Seth and Leah need anything, I want you to let me know so I can do it and most importantly, I'm going to try to convince you that going to someone for help is the right thing to do. No matter how long it takes."

I sighed, knowing that he would be wasting his time.

"I have a plan Edward; I don't need your help."

"What's your plan?" He lounged back against the pillows at the arm of the couch.

"I'll endure it. until both Seth and Leah are old enough to move on, then I plan to run away and hope he doesn't find me."

"That's your big plan?" He asked, with a sarcastic tone.

I lowered my head.

"Bella, Seth is still a little kid; you can't endure that type of pain for that long."

"I've done it so far." I countered.

"Yes, but look at the damage it's caused for not only you but for Seth and Leah too."

"Edward I would appreciate it if you would let me decide what is best for my family."

"Bella," he said, in a sad voice. "Just let me help you."

"You can't," I said, shaking my head.

"Yes, I can." He defended. "Either I help you, and try to prevent him from hurting you, or I go to my parents and tell them what's going on, regardless of the consequences."

"What about Jessica?" I asked.

"What about her?" He asked, furrowing his eyebrows.

"Well, won't she get jealous if she sees you around me?" I was sure of that since they were probably back together, he wouldn't want to give her a reason to be mad at him.

"Bella, Jessica and I are through. I thought you knew that?"

"But I heard her today in the hall say she wanted to get back together." I exclaimed. shaking my head.

"She did, but that doesn't mean _I_ do." He explained. "Besides, even if I did, it wouldn't change anything. I would still want to be here for you."

Something about those words made me thankful and scared at the same time. I cared about him a lot, even though I had no right to. He would never see me as anything other than a project or a responsibility. But it scared me because the more time I spent with him, the more I liked him, and the more I wanted him to like me. I knew it never would be though. But I was thankful to have someone to talk to and confide in, for as long as it might last. I knew eventually he would give up or get scared and I would be alone again. I couldn't let myself get too close, it was dangerous for both him and me.

"Come on, I want to show you something." He stood and reached out his hand to help me to my feet. He guided me to the piano that I was looking at earlier and sat me down on the bench. He sat down next to me and gave me a nervous smile then placed his fingers on the keys and started playing a beautiful song. I had never seen anything so amazing in all my life. Watching him play was fascinating, the focus on his face was apparent, his lips puckered up a little, his eyes were squinted and intense, and his forehead was wrinkled. I could tell he enjoyed playing the piano a lot. When he was finished playing the song, he smiled in satisfaction.

"That was beautiful." I complimented. "I didn't know that you played."

"I actually haven't played in a long time." He said. "I'm surprised I even remembered how."

"You're really good at it though, why don't you play anymore?"

"I guess I got distracted with football, and girls, and of course school."

"You should try to find time to play; I can tell by your face that it means a lot to you." He looked up from the keys and gave me a big smile, which I returned.

"I should get you home." He stood from the bench and headed towards the back door that we entered through. I followed behind him. Once our coats were back on, we walked outside and I thought we would go back to the car but he walked past it.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"I'm taking you home." He responded, reaching for my hand.

"Oh," I was confused but I took his hand and let him guide me.

He stopped and looked at me with a concerned look. "Are you okay to walk?"

"Of course I am, why?" I asked.

"I know he hurt you over the weekend and you were in pain today. I saw the bruises."

"I'm used to it, Edward. It's really not that big of a deal."

He sighed heavily. "It's not something you should be used to, Bella."

"I'm fine." I tried to walk ahead of him but he didn't release my hand and pulled me back.

I watched him swallow hard. "I am going to get you away from him, I don't know what I'm going to do, or how, but I am." He said, with real sincerity in his voice that I did believe him, at least I wanted to.

We started walking through the woods hand in hand. We walked slowly and he told me to pay attention to where I was and how to get through the woods. I tried to, but I was so focused on his hand holding mine, that I didn't think about much else.

"Bella," he asked, timidly while we continued to walk. "Why was he hitting you this weekend?

"You don't want to know Edward." I replied.

"Yes, I do." He exclaimed.

I looked straight ahead and quietly responded. "It was because of you." He stopped abruptly, looking at me with wide eyes.

"Why was he hitting you because of me?"

"He's questioning how much you know. After everything that happened with you coming by my house and him stopping you; then what happened at the game, he thinks you know and that I told you."

"What did you tell him?"

"I told him you didn't know anything." I replied. "Edward, I'm not going to put you in danger. I can keep him believing that you don't know anything. But you have to back off before people start talking."

"That's why you don't want me to help you right?" He asked. "It's because you're trying to protect me?"

I lowered my head to the ground and he stepped closer to me placing his hands on my shoulders. "Bella, you need to take care of yourself, I can handle anything he tries to do to me. I have a good family support system and you don't have anyone."

"I have you." I said the words before I registered what I had said and once it was out, my face flushed with embarrassment.

He smiled and brushed my cheek with his fingers. "Yes you do, and don't ever forget that."

He reached down and grabbed my hand guiding me the rest of the way to my house. I didn't even know it was possible to get to my house from his through the woods but he told me he found his way here by chance the other day and he wanted me to know the way just in case I needed it. I knew I would never use it but I humored him and paid attention to all the landmarks he mentioned.

Once we got to my house, we said goodbye and he headed back in the direction we came. I walked to the house and realizing that it was almost time for school to let out I called the middle school asking them to tell Leah to pick up Seth and come straight home.

I got an early start on the daily cleaning before Seth and Leah got home. I was lost in my own thoughts when the door came crashing open startling me. I turned towards the door to see the frightened faces of my brother and sister.

"Um... Hi." I said.

"Bella, what happened?" Leah asked. "Why are you home already?" They came in and shut the door behind them.

"Oh, I had a really bad day and Edward brought me home early."

"Edward did? I thought you were planning to stay away from him? What if dad finds out?" Leah spurted out question after question.

"He won't find out, Edward is aware of what's going on and he knows he has to be careful, for us and him.

"You told him? Leah asked, in disbelieve. "Bella dad's been hitting you all weekend long because of him, why would you continue to risk that?"

"I don't know why you are getting so upset about this." I said, irritated by her doubt. "You were the one that tried to tell me to talk to him and see if he could help us. And now that I am you change your mind and start getting upset about it? What do you want me to do, Leah?"

"I'm scared Bella, after what happened to me and knowing firsthand what happens to you almost daily, I don't want to give him more of a reason to do that to you." She replied.

"Leah, I'm being really careful and I'm not sure if I even trust Edward completely, but he figured it out on his own and the only way for me to prevent him from saying anything, I have to remain close to him." It was part of the reason; I had to stay close to know what he was doing and thinking, but most of all it was a selfish reason. I wanted to spend time with him and get to know him better.

"Just please be careful. I don't want anything to happen to you." She said, with sadness in her voice.

I walked the short distance to her and hugged her. "I know Leah, I'll be careful. I promise."

"Bella," A small voice said from beside us.

"What is it Seth?" I asked him.

"You aren't going to go away like mom did, are you?"

I leaned down and hugged him tightly. "I'm not going anywhere, Seth. I will always be here for you." I was reminded of Edward's words earlier when he told me he would be here for me just like I would be here for Seth and Leah. Maybe he was serious about wanting to help us. Maybe I could trust him and depend on him. Maybe he was the answer to all of our wishes and prayers to be free.

* * *

Okay so to clarify I know it would be alot easier for Edward to just tell someone what he knows but he's a little bit paranoid with what James may do to him so he thinks if he helps her by being a friend and trying to convince her to tell someone herself it will be easier on him and her, plus it would ruin the timeline of my story. But don't worry it pays off in the end. He's also the son of a doctor and a teacher so he knows that writing things down and making notes will be good if she does decide to get help or if he's forced to tell someone himself. Bella has never had a boy ever pay attention to her and she is falling for Edward even though she feels like she has no right to or deserves to and she doesn't think he will ever feel that way about her. She thinks he is being her friend and helping her because he feels obligated to. Right now Edward is attracted to her but his only focus is to help her, he has no interest in her romantically. As far as Rosalie goes, she will have a little bit of a mention later on but as some of you know, I don't care much for the character and definitely not the actress who portrays her in the movie so I'm not that big on making her an important part of the story. Anything else, just ask.

Thanks to everyone who is reading and reviewing my story. It means alot to me and I appreciate the feedback.

Shout out to all the FanFuckingTastic 14 girls. Love all of you.


	10. Chapter 9

Sorry this chapter took so long, I had the dreaded swine flu as did my kids and husband so I've been a little out of it, plus the beautiful Harpers Bazaar pictures were released which were a huge distraction for me as well as my beta's, but to make it up to all of you this chapter is extra long. I really appreciate all the great reviews I get from all of you and that so many of you are putting me on favorites and alerts. It means so much to me that so many people like my story. I have lots of ideas for future stories after this one so I hope you will all look for those after this one is done. But don't worry this story is far from being finished and I won't be starting any others until this one is done except for maybe a one shot for Christmas. Thanks to bzeemomof4 and redlulu for being awesome beta's. And of course I love all the FFT14 girls, you all were the best medicine while I was sick.

Okay so here's a challenge, Bella is going to be beat pretty badly by James next chapter, nothing too drastic but still pretty bad. I'm having a hard time coming up with a reason why, so I thought I would ask all of you if you have some good ideas. A few rules though James isn't finding out about Edward yet so that can't be it, and it has to be something that would involve Seth and Leah in a way. Leave ideas and thoughts in reviews and if I choose one of the ideas I'll credit you for it. Thanks!!! I hope everyone likes this chapter.

Oh and as for the song, I like it sang by both the pretenders and carrie underwood and both versions can be found on youtube and I think itunes as well, so if you actually listen to the songs then whatever your preference is, you should be able to find it.

* * *

**I'll Stand By You: The Pretenders/Carrie Underwood**

Oh, why you look so sad?  
Tears are in your eyes  
Come on and come to me now  
Don't be ashamed to cry  
Let me see you through  
'cause I've seen the dark side too  
When the night falls on you  
You don't know what to do  
Nothing you confess  
Could make me love you less

I'll stand by you  
I'll stand by you  
Won't let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you

So if you're mad, get mad  
Don't hold it all inside  
Come on and talk to me now  
Hey, what you got to hide?  
I get angry too  
Well I'm a lot like you  
When you're standing at the crossroads  
And don't know which path to choose  
Let me come along  
'cause even if you're wrong

I'll stand by you  
I'll stand by you  
Won't let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you  
Take me in, into your darkest hour  
And I'll never desert you  
I'll stand by you

And when...  
When the night falls on you, baby  
You're feeling all alone  
You won't be on your own

I'll stand by you  
I'll stand by you  
Won't let nobody hurt you

I'll stand by you  
Take me in, into your darkest hour  
And I'll never desert you  
I'll stand by you  
I'll stand by you  
Won't let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you  
Won't let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you

**EPOV**

I made sure Bella got home then I walked back rather slowly. Bella had given me a lot to think about. I knew I still planned to be there for her. I made that promise to her and myself. I wasn't going to abandon her like so many others had. I had to help her, but I'm fucking paranoid of what James would do if he found out I was even breathing the same air as her. I didn't want him to do anything to me or my family and I didn't want her to be hurt by him because of me anymore. I never want to give him a reason to hurt her ever again. That's what I promised her, that I would do whatever I could to prevent him from hurting her, so my only option was to stay away from her in public. At school I would have to keep my distance. Today in the hall was probably really risky and I shouldn't have held her like that but I hated to see her cry and didn't want to her to feel alone.

Once I headed back my phone started buzzing.

"Hello."

"Edward, what the hell did you do to Bella today?"

"Hi Alice, it's so nice to hear from you too."

"Cut the crap Edward," she spurts. "What happened? Neither one of you were in school for the rest of the day. What did you do to her?"

"I didn't _do _anything to her, Alice. I just took her home."

"You better not have hurt her. I will kill you if you did."

"I'm not the one who hurts her." I shouted. Alice was making me really mad with her accusations.

"No shit Sherlock, but you could be the reason for it."

"Wait, what?" Did she know? Why didn't she tell me? Or better yet not do anything? Wasn't Bella her friend?

I heard her sigh before she began to talk again. "Its James isn't it?"

I could tell her the truth, but I promised Bella I wouldn't say anything to anyone. "I really can't say anything Alice."

"You don't have to." She said in a somber voice. "I think I've always known. I've known her my entire life. Our mothers were best friends growing up. I watched her turn from the happy-go-lucky girl to a zombie, once he moved into their lives. But I couldn't ever do anything. I knew he was controlling and mean, but I didn't know he was hurting her too." I let her continue on her revelation without interrupting. I could tell she felt bad about not noticing before. "Maybe that's why I thought it was such a good idea for you to ask her to the dance. You are the perfect person for her to confide in and get help from. Your dad's a doctor, your mom's a teacher, your brother is a police officer… it's the best combination of people to help her and I know her well enough to know that she will do anything you asked her too.

"Why do you say that?" Bella didn't do anything I asked. She was more stubborn than me.

"Because it's common knowledge that a girl would do anything for a boy she likes." A boy she likes? Bella _likes_ me? Okay, I think I knew that but it definitely wasn't true about doing anything I asked.

"So what are you planning to do? Have you talked to your parents yet?" She asked.

"No." I replied.

"Why?" She asked with a shocked tone. "Edward, you have to tell someone."

"Alice, it's not that simple, she won't agree to tell the truth and she said she'd lie. She's trying to keep her brother and sister safe, as well as me."

"You, why is she wanting to keep you safe?"

"It's a long story Alice, but I promised her, for right now, I wouldn't say anything."

"Well if you don't, I will."

"Alice, please you can't. It will only make things worse, for them and me."

She began laughing. "I can't believe that after finding out she is being abused by her step father you are still being a self centered prick and thinking only of yourself in this situation."

"That's not what I'm doing." Am I?

"Then what do you call it? You are refusing to tell anyone who could help her and telling me not to do anything also."

"You don't know the whole story, and trust me, I'm doing everything I can to help her, but it's going to take time and I need you to keep quiet about it right now."

"I can't believe you are asking me to do this. She's my best friend Edward. I can't, not help her."

"The best thing you could do right now is let it go and let me handle it."

"Oh yeah, you are handling it so well." She said sarcastically.

"Alice, I promise you, everything I am doing is for her. I have to keep in mind what this is going to do to her and her brother and sister if I say anything now. You don't know what he's capable of."

"Is he abusing them too?"

"I don't know, maybe a little. I know he did something to Leah the other night but she didn't go into detail."

She let out a defeated sigh. "So what's your plan?"

"Right now, I'm trying to get her to trust me so she will share some of the details of what happens. Eventually I'm hoping that she will trust me enough to want to get help. Right now she's refusing to talk to anyone."

"And what if this doesn't work?" She asked.

"I don't know I'm still trying to figure out what there is I can do."

"This really sucks, Edward."

"I know, but I promise if I can't do it alone then I'll come to you for help. Maybe she'll listen to you, better than she will, me. But you have to give me a chance to try."

"You better not do anything to hurt her or I will come after you."

"Alice, I would never do anything intentionally to hurt her, my only focus is to keep her safe."

"You really like her don't you?" I could hear the smile in her voice.

I wasn't sure how to respond to that. "I'm just trying to help."

"Alright, I won't say anything right now, but if she comes to school with bruises again like she did today I'm going to go after James myself."

I started laughing at the thought of little Alice attacking the chief of police. "Thanks Alice."

I hung up with her, still worried about what she might do. But at least it meant I had another person on my side, on her side.

The next day at school I did my best to avoid contact with her like I had planned. I could see it upset her and it made me feel bad. I had to come up with a better plan. How was I possibly going to help her if I avoided her?

"So," Jessica asked coming up behind me at my locker. "Have you given any more thought to what I said yesterday?"

I rolled my eyes before turning around to face her. "What was it that I was supposed to be thinking about?"

"Edward, don't play dumb. You know I feel bad about the whole homecoming dance thing, it was a silly mistake that I will never make again." She leaned into me and placed her palms on my chest. "I want you back."

At that moment I looked up and saw Bella walk by, she pretended not to notice me but I knew she had. She looked sad or hurt. I had this overwhelming guilt, come over me.

I grabbed Jessica's hands and placed them back at her sides and watched her smile fade to a look of shock. "Like I said yesterday, I'm not interested."

I began to walk away but she yelled after me. "Why, is Bella Swan, school freak, better than me?" I stopped and turned around glaring at her.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Come on Edward, she's a freak, her mom killed herself and now she's screwed up and you've been hanging all over her since we broke up. What did she do to you?"

"She's not a freak, Jessica." I said through gritted teeth. "Just because everyone doesn't have a "perfect" life like you, does not make them freaks. And I'm not hanging all over her; I sit with Jasper, my friend, and his girlfriend who happens to be friends with Bella."

"And what was that in the hallway yesterday?" She asked with her hands on her hips, tilting her head slightly.

"It's really none of your business, but since I know if I don't tell you, you'll come up with your own scenario and spread it all over school cause that's what you're good at, starting untrue rumors, I'll tell you. I said something that made her upset and I felt bad about it, so I was trying to console her."

"What was it that you said?"

"You are such a nosey bitch."

"Don't call me a bitch, Edward."

"Then stay out of this."

"I just hope she doesn't do any weird psycho shit on you. I've heard she's into witch craft and worshipping the devil and crazy stuff like that."

I couldn't help but laugh at these rumors. Jessica was the crazy psycho here, not Bella. Bella was innocent and sweet and caring. Jessica was a conniving two-faced bitch. I shook my head and walked away not wanting to engage in this conversation any more.

Once I was in my seat for class, I began to think about what had just happened. A week ago if Jessica had come to me and said she wanted to get back together, I probably wouldn't have thought about it, I would have just done it. But now after knowing Bella better, I have something more important to focus on, something to care about. I needed to figure out how to see her and make sure she was okay and be sure she understood why I was avoiding her at school. She had to understand why; it was her idea in the first place. But the looks I kept seeing on her face during the day were heart wrenching. I wanted to go to her and tell her I was sorry and that she didn't need to be sad anymore. I hated this really; I had never cared about another person this much in my life. I literally hurt just thinking of what she must go through on a daily basis with that man and I wanted to kill him. But more than anything I wanted to keep her safe.

Through the rest of the day I avoided Bella all together. I sat with the football team instead of Jasper and partly that was because of Alice giving me death glares once I walked into the cafeteria.

After school was over, I went to practice to once again get yelled at by coach for not focusing and giving it my all. After a grueling practice, I went home and straight to my room. My parents were being really strict on this grounding thing so I got started on my homework right away in hopes that maybe I'd get off on good behavior but they didn't seem to be budging. Even after all the work I did over the weekend and coming straight home after practice and doing my homework. I was even doing the dishes after dinner. But they weren't easing up on the 2 weeks. Oh well, I guess it could have been worse. They hadn't taken my car away and I still had my phone, I just couldn't go anywhere but school, practice, and home.

After I was done with my homework, I went down stairs and helped my dad with moving the outdoor furniture into the garage for the winter months. We didn't talk much other than him telling me where things go and what needs to be moved. After we were done we had dinner and I tried my best to make casual conversation with them and things seemed to be getting better. They weren't giving me the third degree about what was bothering me anymore and they weren't lecturing me; so all in all, I was feeling better. But my mind was never far from the look on Bella's face today, I had to figure out a way to see her.

"Would it be okay if I went for another run tonight?"

"Where is it you go on these runs?" My dad asked with a cynical tone.

"Nowhere, I just run through the woods a little then turn around and come back." I replied.

"I'm not sure if I feel comfortable with you running in the woods, especially this late at night." My mom was being over protective again and really it was probably the biggest thing that bothered me about her.

"Mom, I'll be fine. I only want to go for a run and then I'll be right back. I won't be gone more than an hour."

My parent's exchanged a look then my dad sighed and said I could. I thanked both of them then ran upstairs to throw on some running clothes and tennis shoes. I knew exactly where I was going; I had to make sure she was okay. I knew I probably wouldn't be able to talk to her but I thought if I could at least see her in her room, through her window, then I would know if she was okay.

I ran as fast as I could through the woods and got to her house in a matter of minutes. I stood back as far away as I could so as not to be seen. I looked up at her window but her light was off. I wondered if maybe she had already gone to bed. I waited a few minutes more and right as I was about to go home I heard the garage door open, I froze. Was I spotted? Did James know I was here? I hid as best I could and watched as James pulled out of the garage and headed down the street. Seconds later, I saw Bella's bedroom light come on. I had to be sure she was okay; she was obviously downstairs with him before he left. What was he doing? Did he hurt her again? I ran through the back of her house and jumped the fence then climbed the tree that was close to her room. Once I was at her window I knocked on the glass, she jumped and dropped the books she had in her hand. She turned around and I gave her a quick wave and smile before she walked over and opened the window.

"What are you doing?" She just about screamed.

"Are, you okay? I saw James leave, did he hurt you?"

"No, Edward what are you doing?" She asked again. "How did you get in here?"

"I climbed the tree up to your window. So he didn't hurt you tonight?"

"No, he didn't."

I sighed in relief. "Good."

"Edward, you need to leave, before…"

"Bella, can you help… oh." Leah walked in and stopped talking once she noticed me here. Her eyes were huge as they darted back and forth between me and Bella.

"What do you need help with Leah?" I asked, with a reassuring smile.

"Um, Seth needs help with his math but I'm trying to study for a test." She answered.

"Show me the way and I can help him." Leah pointed down the hall to Seth's room so I headed towards it, knowing full well Leah would be asking Bella all kinds of questions. Probably questions she couldn't answer considering we hadn't had more than a few seconds to talk before she came in.

I knocked on Seth's door then walked in, he met me with the same bulging, scared eyes as Leah and Bella had. I looked around the room and was saddened by the lack of decoration. There was only a bed, a dresser, and a small box of a few toys. No posters, no action figures, no Tonka trucks, this was not a typical little boys room.

"Hi Seth, I'm Edward, do you remember me from the other day?" I asked in a quiet voice.

He nodded.

"I'm a friend of Bella's, and I heard you needed help with your homework."

He nodded again. I sat at the foot of the bed slowly so I didn't scare him.

"Why don't you show me what you needed help with?"

He brought his paper to me and showed me what it was that he was struggling with. It was simple double digit addition so I helped him with the problems and within a few minutes he had it all done. I listened to him read his book to me that he was assigned, and then he was finished.

"I'm going to go talk to Bella now." I said.

"Okay." Seth got off his bed and started playing with some of the beat up dirty toys when I left. I looked down the hall and saw Leah standing in her doorway glaring at me. I smiled at her but she slammed her door.

I walked back to Bella's room and stood in the doorway. She was crying but once she noticed me she dried her tears and sat up.

"Bella, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, it's just Leah. She's not happy that I told you."

I walked over and sat on a chair that was by the window. Her room was not much different than Seth's plain white walls, with a twin size bed, a dresser, a small shelf that was stacked with books, and this chair I was sitting in now.

"Why is she not happy?" I asked.

"She thinks that if you get too close it's going to make things worse." She said. "She's afraid of what James will do if he finds out."

"Well I guess I have to earn her trust too then." I said.

"That may be harder than you think." Bella replied, shaking her head.

"You trust me though, right?"

She opened her mouth to respond but never did.

"Bella, you do understand why I didn't talk to you today, don't you?"

"Oh… yeah, I get it. I know why."

"It's not that I don't want to, we have to be careful right?"

"Right, I don't want people to start talking."

There was an awkward silence between us so I grabbed the history book off her bed and started thumbing through it to have something to busy my hands with.

"I have this class, what period do you have it?" I asked.

"Um, that's first period."

"I have Spanish first."

"Spanish is third for me." She said with a smile.

I put the book down and took a deep breath. "So where did James go?"

"I don't know, he leaves most nights after dinner and doesn't come back until really late."

"So, I could come over every night?" I became nervous at the way that sounded. "I mean, if you want me to, I can help Seth and even Leah if she wants it. Then maybe you and I could do our homework together."

"If you want to, I guess that would be okay. But we have to come up with some sort of signal or something. I don't want you getting caught."

"Maybe you can put some sort of sign in your window. Like a piece of paper or something."

"Would you be able to see it?"

"Yeah, I think so. I ripped a piece of paper out of her notebook and put it in the window. If it's okay for me to come in then put the paper up, if not then leave it on the shelf."

"Okay."

"So, is there anything you need, anything at all?"

"No, we're fine. Thank you for helping Seth though. I appreciate it."

"Yeah, it's no problem at all. He does know he shouldn't say anything right?" I was worried with Seth being so young that he might let it slip that I was here.

"He won't say anything; he doesn't talk to James much or anyone really. He talks to me and Leah and to his teacher, when she asks him too, but that's it."

"Okay. Well I probably should go, I'm grounded right now and I'm surprised they let me out to go for a run, but I told them I wouldn't be gone long."

"Alright, I'll see you tomorrow then?" She had a hopeful look on her face.

I smiled. "Yeah, I'll be back tomorrow. Remember the signal."

She shook her head then I opened the window and climbed back down the tree.

The next day, I did the same thing as I did yesterday. I didn't talk to her or sit with her at lunch. But this time Bella didn't have the sad look on her face when I would pass her in the halls. I tried to get out of the house for another run but my parents thought it was too cold for a run. So I waited until they went to bed around 9:30 and snuck out. The paper was in the window so I climbed up and was surprised to find the window open already. She wasn't here though. I sat in the chair and decided to wait for her to get back, just in case something was wrong. After a few minutes she came in and was startled by me being there.

"Hi." She said timidly.

"Hi."

"I didn't think you were coming tonight."

"Oh, well the grounding thing got in the way. I had to wait till my parent's went to bed so I could sneak out."

"I see." She walked over to her bed and sat down, crossing her legs in front of her.

"I can leave, if it's too late." I grabbed my bag and started to stand up.

"No, you don't have to go." She said rushing through the words.

"Alright," I said. "Are you okay?" I sat back down and dropped my bag on the floor.

"I'm just tired." She said, rubbing her eyes. "Seth has been having a lot of nightmares lately, so it's hard to get him to sleep sometimes."

I thought maybe I should go anyway. If she was tired there was no reason for me to stay.

"I have to finish my homework, I haven't even started." She reached over and grabbed her backpack off the floor.

"Well I brought mine too, we can work together." I rummaged through my bag and pulled out my books placing them at the foot of the bed.

We worked together on all our homework and I was actually surprised how quickly we got it done. After we were finished, I sat at the foot of her bed while she lay down on her pillow and we talked.

"So, did anything happen today? James didn't do anything, did he?" I asked.

"No, the last few days he's kind of avoided us."

"Is that a good thing?"

"Usually," she answered.

I wanted to ask her so much about the past, what happened to her mom, when he first started beating them, but I needed her to trust me first.

"Can I ask you something?" She asked.

"Yeah, of course," I said.

"The other day, when you took me home, when we were in the office with Ms. Cope, she said something about you keeping your mouth shut. What was she talking about?"

I let out a small laugh and ducked my head. "You really want to know?"

She nodded her head at me and wrinkled her forehead.

"Okay, um a couple weeks ago, I stayed behind after practice to work on my throwing. Everyone else had left and I thought it was just me, after it started to get dark and I couldn't see the ball anymore I went to the locker rooms to change but I was surprised to see coaches light on, so I walked by and saw him and Ms. Cope… on his desk." I looked at her with raised eyebrows.

"Oh..." Her eyes were big and mouth agape as she figured out exactly what it was I was telling her.

"Yeah," I said with a smirk on my face. "I grabbed my stuff and got out of there, as quickly as I could. I wanted to burn my eye sockets out after that. I'm surprised I made it home okay."

"So, what did you do?" She asked with a slight smile.

"I didn't say anything about it for a while, I tried to push it out of my memory, but then I needed to get you out of class, so I kind of brought it up to her and she freaked out, started begging me not to say anything to anyone, so I told her I wouldn't if she did me a couple favors."

"So, that was your connection you talked about?"

We were both laughing now and I realized it was the first time I had ever heard her laugh. She was breathtaking when she laughed. I wanted to make her laugh all the time.

"Wow, I can't believe Coach Kraft and Ms. Cope." She said shaking her head from the thought.

"Just be glad you didn't have to actually see it."

"Believe me; I am very glad of that."

After we calmed down from laughing we sat there for a few minutes in silence.

"Tell me about your family." She asked. She began to yawn and blink her eyes heavily.

"There isn't a lot to tell that you probably don't already know."

"Tell me some memory you have of them when you were a kid."

"Um," I thought for a moment. "Okay, there was this one time that we went to Colorado to go skiing. I think I must have been about Seth's age, Emmett was fifteen, I remember that because he had just got his permit and he was always begging to drive but dad wouldn't let him because of the snow. Dad worked a lot when we were younger and this was our first real family vacation out of state. I had never been skiing, but like I said before I was always trying to live up to Emmett. I went to the highest hill, following behind him and at first was okay but then, I lost my balance and tumbled all the way to the bottom. I cried all the way to the emergency room and they told me that I broke my arm. I was so mad because that meant I couldn't ski anymore. The next day, instead of going out to ski without me, my whole family stayed in the hotel room with me and we rented movies and ate popcorn, and drank hot chocolate. I think it was my favorite family vacation even though I had ruined it." I looked over at her after I was done telling the story and she was fast asleep. I stifled a laugh, got up off the bed being careful not to move too much or wake her. I covered her up, shut off the lights and left out the window before her dad got home.

By the time I got home it was already past midnight and I was exhausted. I climbed the tree to my room, threw my bag on the floor and climbed into bed.

Every night that week I went to her house. Sometimes I was able to get out sooner to see Seth, I liked Seth a lot. Once he warmed up to me he was always so happy to see me and even though I knew he knew how to do some of his homework, he would wait for me to help him. Leah still avoided me, but I think she was starting to get used to me being around. Bella and I would always do our homework together after Seth went to bed, then we would sit up and talk until she either fell asleep or it was time for me to go. Most of the time we talked about school, and she asked me to tell her stories of my childhood a lot. I asked her about her mom once, but she didn't want to talk about it; so I didn't bring it up anymore. The best thing was that James hadn't hurt her all week and pretty much avoided her all together.

"So, I always tell you about my family memories, it's time you tell me one of yours." I asked one night while we sat on her bed talking, like we did every night.

"I don't have a lot of happy family memories." She said with a sad look.

"It doesn't have to be happy, just tell me something about your childhood."

"Um, I remember right before my mom met James, she got this crazy idea to go to the beach in the middle of winter. It was so cold but it was just her and I; so we bundled up in coats and gloves. I remember she made me wear three pairs of socks. Then we drove over to La Push and went down on the beach and made a sand castle, in the freezing cold sand." She laughed. "It was the saddest looking sand castle ever, but we had so much fun."

"That sounds like a happy memory to me." I said.

"Yeah, I guess it is. But at the same time it makes me sad, because Leah and Seth have never seen the ocean. They probably never will." She was somber now and I could tell she was holding back the tears.

I crawled across the bed and sat next to her, putting my arm around her shoulders to comfort her.

"Bella, I promise you, I will make sure Seth and Leah get to see the ocean someday."

She forced a half smile before laying her head on my shoulder. We sat there together, not saying anything, just leaning into each other and reveling in the comfort of each other. All this time, I thought I was helping her but I was realizing she was helping me just as much. She was the first person I didn't have to worry about having an image for or pretending to be someone I wasn't. I liked feeling free to be me for once.

"Do you still want to know what happened to my mom?" She whispered, leaning into me more.

"Only if you want to tell me," I answered.

"Remember how I told you that she started talking to people and was trying to get us help?" I nodded my head. "Well James found out about it and he beat her and yelled at her. So one day she packed all of us up and we left. We went to the bus station and she got tickets for all of us to go as far as we could with the money she had saved over the years. But only 4 days after running he found us. He dragged us back home and he locked my mom in the basement like I told you. He beat her so bad for days. He made us watch sometimes. He wanted us to know what happens when we open our mouths and tell people about our home life or try to run from him. He made us believe that she had done something horrible, that we had no right to run. She didn't eat or drink anything for days and after a week of torturing her he took her out late one night. She cried and begged him not to the entire time they walked to the garage." I could hear the tremble in her voice telling me this story. Even my own breathing was becoming erratic. I didn't want to hear this story, but at the same time I did. "He came home later that night without her. The next day we heard that they found her body at the bottom of the cliffs. She was battered and bruised and she was dead." My heart sank for her. I couldn't imagine what that must have been like for her. "I remember standing at her funeral holding Seth and Leah close to me and feeling like I had died along with her. When we got home that night, it was the first time James beat me. I was so scared; I didn't know what to do. All I kept thinking about was what would happen to Seth and Leah if I died too."

"So your dad killed your mom?" I asked. I already knew the answer but I had to ask.

"I don't know for sure, but I think he did."

I had tears in my eyes at the thought of what they went through. I pulled her closer to me wrapping my other arm around her too. "Bella, I can't let him hurt you anymore. I need to get you out of here. Just let me help you, please, I know my family will believe you."

"And what if they don't Edward?" She asked, pulling away from me. "I can't take that same risk my mom did. If no one believes me and he finds out I've been talking he'll do the same thing to me that he did to my mom and Leah's mom."

"Leah's mom, what did he do to her?" Had he killed her too? I never even thought to wonder what happened to her.

"Her name was Victoria, she was his wife in Phoenix, and he said she was in a car accident when Leah was a little girl."

"But you don't believe that?"

"Not after knowing what he did to my mom."

"Bella, I know you're scared but I can help, I won't let him hurt you. I believe you and I'll help you make others believe too."

"I'm not ready, maybe someday but not yet." She had tears streaming down her face and I could see the terror she had. I wiped the tears away with my thumbs and nodded my head letting her know I understood. She lay back on my chest and cried some more. I held her in my arms and tried to hold back my own tears. I didn't want her to hurt anymore. I wanted to see her happy, to hear her laugh again.

"You probably want to run away now that you know." She accused.

"I'm not going anywhere, Bella. I told you that. I'm here to stay until you tell me to leave."

"You aren't scared?"

"Of course I'm scared, I'm worried about you and what might happen, but I'm more afraid of what will happen if I don't do anything to help you."

She sat up and turned her head away from me. "It's getting late, you should probably go."

"Okay," I said, shocked by her tone. I got up off the bed and packed up my books in my bag. She was pushing me away; I could see that, but why. "Do you want me to come back?" I asked when I got to the window.

"I don't know, I guess if the paper is in the window you'll know."

"Bella, why are you doing this?"

"I can't get too close to you. I don't want anything to happen to you because of me."

"Nothing is happening to me, I'm not afraid of him and you need to stop being afraid too. You have people on your side."

"Just go Edward, please."

"Fine, I'll see you tomorrow." I stepped out on the ledge and onto the tree. I looked back before I headed down and I saw her curled up on her bed crying. I wanted to go back and comfort her. Stay with her all night if I had to, but she told me to leave so did. I went home and wrote everything she told me down. I knew if I kept notes on everything she revealed to me it would help if I ever had to tell someone what was going on. I had a hard time sleeping with the images of her crying filling my mind. I think at one point, I even woke up from a nightmare of her falling off a cliff, like her mom did.

The next day at school, she looked tired and her eyes were blood shot. I'm sure I looked just as bad. No one else might have noticed her, but I did and I knew why. I had to talk to her, so I slipped her a note as I walked by her in the hall to meet me in the room above the gym. I wasn't sure she would come, but I went there at lunch and waited. After a few minutes of waiting I heard the door open slowly. I jumped up and ran over to meet her.

"You came." I said.

"Why wouldn't I come?" She came in further and sat down.

"Last night you seemed mad at me."

"I'm not mad at you, I'm mad at myself."

"Why are you mad at yourself?" I asked, confused.

"I should be strong enough to fight back, to get help."

"Bella, I know you're scared but I'll be here, always." I reached out and took her hand in mine.

"And what happens when you go off to college? You do plan to do that next year, right?"

"Well yeah but…"

"But nothing, you'll be here for a while and be my friend, help Seth with his homework, and maybe even get Leah to trust you but once you leave, we'll be alone again."

"Bella, listen to me." I looked deep into her eyes. "I'm not going anywhere. If I have to, I'll take all three of you with me to college and hide you out in my dorm room." This made her laugh and she push me away playfully.

"You're the only friend I have that understands me and knows me. I guess that scares me a little." She said.

I reached out and hugged her tightly. "I know it does, but you don't need to be afraid of me or my friendship. And you might be surprised how much Alice knows, she knows you just as well as I do."

She looked at me curiously. "Did you tell Alice?" She asked.

"No, of course not, I didn't have to, she already knew."

"Alice knows?" I could tell she was on the verge of a panic attack, I recognized the reaction she was having.

"Bella," I said, rubbing her arms to calm her. "It's okay, Alice isn't going to say anything. She promised me she wouldn't. She's worried about you though."

"What did you tell her?"

"I told her that I was taking care of it and that she needed to keep quiet for now."

"And she agreed to this?" She was beginning to relax and I saw her take a couple deep breaths.

"Yeah, she did. She's not going to say anything, at least not until she talks to me first and if she comes to me, I'll convince her that you aren't ready and to give you time."

She shook her head accepting this explanation.

"It's going to be okay Bella, I made you a promise to stick by you though everything and I intend to keep my promise, no matter how hard it may get, I'll be there for you."

"Thanks." She offered.

"There's nothing to thank me for." I gave her a slight smile and squeezed her shoulder slightly.

I reached into my bag and pulled out the lunch I had packed and gave her half of my sandwich. She laughed at first but took it and we ate in silence until it was time to go to class.

I continued to sneak into her room every night but I stopped asking her questions about her past. It obviously made her upset and that was the last thing I wanted to do. I started bringing board games with me, if I was able to get over there soon enough. Seth and even Leah would play with us. They all seemed so happy and would laugh and get excited. For the first time, I think they were letting go of the fear and enjoying themselves. One night, I brought over my guitar and played for them. Seth was in such awe of my guitar. I promised him I would teach him how to play. I really wasn't that good at it but they all liked it and wanted me to play song after song.

On a Friday night, at our last game of the season, we won the game so that made coach and my family happy; plus I knew there were scouts in the audience so that was promising. I had hopes of going to a college with a good football program. I didn't care where just as long as I got to play football. My parents decided to go to dinner in Port Angeles after the game and now that my grounding was up I told them I was going to a party. They made me promise I wouldn't be drinking and if I was actually going to a party, I probably would be drinking but since I was planning to go see Bella, I knew I wouldn't be drinking.

I got to her house really late and I knew Seth and Leah would probably be sleeping, so I didn't bring anything with me. No games or homework, just myself. This was going to be a short visit anyway. I just had to see her before I went to bed. I checked to see if the paper was in the window and it was so I climbed up to the window that was always open, waiting for me.

When I was finally in the room and looked at her, I could see she was upset. She was curled up in a fetal position on the bed.

When she noticed me come in, I saw the tears well up in her eyes. She didn't move, or try to hide the tears. I closed the distance between us, lying next to her on the bed, wrapping her in my arms.

"What happened, Bella?" I asked.

"We got in trouble tonight." She said. "Report cards came home today and James expects us all to have perfect grades. Leah had a C in math; I had a B in biology. I thought I was doing better than that, I thought I was getting an A. Leah has never done well in math and I spend a lot of time helping her but when it comes to test, she freezes up and forgets how to do things."

"What about Seth?" I asked.

"His grades are fine, we always make sure he gets everything done and that he understands it all."

"So what did he do?" I wasn't sure I wanted to hear the details but I know I needed to.

"He mostly yelled at us, I got hit a few times, he tried to hit Leah, but I got in front of him which made him shove me across the room. I hit the wall and fell."

"Bella…" I pushed the hair out of her face and saw the sadness in her eyes. I felt her pain and I'm sure I had the same sad expression on my face as she had on hers.

"I know Edward, you want me to get help, but I can't. Not right now." She buried her head in my chest and I brushed her hair with my fingers, doing my best to comfort her.

"Starting tomorrow, I'm helping you with biology and helping Leah with Math." I whispered.

"You already do so much. I can't ask you to do more."

"You aren't asking, I'm telling you, that's what we're going to do. And really I don't feel like I do anything."

"Edward, just being here every night, spending time with us, playing games with us, teaching Seth how to play guitar, all of that means so much to us. I can't even begin to thank you for all that you've done."

"There's no reason to thank me, I want to be here." I replied. It was the truth; I liked spending time with them, with her. I couldn't go a day without seeing her and touching her. I craved just the scent of her. When I was away from her, all I thought about was the next time I would get to see her. Since coming over every night though, this was the first time James had done anything physical to her and I wanted to hunt him down and torture the bastard. I hated him, I wanted him dead. I wanted Bella to be free, to feel safe for once in her life.

We sat on her bed for a little while just holding on to one another, until we heard Seth crying. Bella hopped up and ran to him. I followed behind her and watched from the doorway. She sat with him rocking back and forth shushing him and singing to him. I never realized how much of a mother figure she was to both him and Leah. They needed her to survive and I think I finally understood her fear of leaving them if things went badly. I turned around to head back to Bella's room and noticed Leah standing in her doorway.

"Is Seth okay?" She asked.

"Yeah, I think so, Bella's in there right now." I replied.

"Edward, can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Sure Leah." I walked down the hall to her room and followed her in. She turned to face me with her arms across her chest.

"What are you doing with my sister?" She asked, with anger in her eyes. Our relationship was complex, some days we were fine and got along great, but other days she looked at me like I was the enemy. I know a lot of it was fear and concern for her family, but it was hard to decipher her moods at times.

"I don't know what you mean."

"She likes you, a lot, and I'm afraid you're going to hurt her. She's never been this close to anyone and I'll admit I like having you around as much as she does. I like seeing my brother and sister smile for once but I don't want you to screw this up."

"Leah, I'm not going to screw anything up, I know what the risks are and I'm being careful."

"But what about Bella, are you being careful with her feelings? I see how she looks at you, and even if you don't ever get caught by dad, if you ever leave her, it's going to break her heart. I can't stand by and watch her go through that type of pain. It would be worse than watching her be beat by dad."

I didn't know how to respond to this. What did she want me to do? I couldn't leave Bella, ever. She was a part of me, and I wanted to be a part of her life forever. Did I like Bella more than a friend? I think that was what Leah was trying to tell me about Bella. Did I feel the same way? "Leah, I promise you, I would never do anything to hurt her. I'm not going anywhere. I like all of you a lot."

"Have you told her that?"

"She knows I would never hurt her, and I'm not leaving."

"I think you need to show her how you feel more. I know she knows you won't ever hurt her or leave, or so you say now. But do you ever show her how much you like her?"

"I see your point Leah, but I'm still earning her trust."

"Believe me Edward, she trusts you completely."

"Thanks for the information, Leah. I'll keep it in mind." I smiled at her and walked back down the hall to Bella's room.

"I thought maybe you left." She said as I walked back in her room.

"Leah wanted to talk to me."

"What did she want to talk about?" She asked with questioning eyes.

I gave her a huge smile. "Nothing I didn't already know. How's Seth."

"He's fine now." She said. "He always has nightmares after we get in trouble."

"And what do you do to calm him down?" I asked sitting on the bed next to her.

"I sing a song that my mom used to sing to us when she was still alive."

"Can you sing it for me?" I asked in a gentle voice.

"No," she replied, her face turning bright red.

"Why?" I asked with a smile.

"Because I can't, it would be embarrassing."

"Why would it be embarrassing Bella, it's only me?"

"Edward, I'm not singing you a lullaby." She said raising an eyebrow.

"Please?" I gave her my best sad face, droopy eyes, bottom lip protruding from frowned mouth. "I have nightmares sometimes too."

"Will you stop? I'm not singing." She shoved me away and I lost my balance on the bed and fell to the floor on my back.

"Are you okay? I'm so sorry." She reached out a hand to help me looking terrified by what happened, but I just laid there laughing.

"Damn Bella, I think I need to put you on the football team, you shove harder than some of the guys on the team." I said mockingly.

"I do not, stop being a brat." She crossed her arms across her chest trying to hold in the smile that was threatening to spread across her face.

"Oh, did I make Bella mad?" I teased, leaning back up on the bed. "There's only one thing to do about that." I reached out a hand and started tickling her ribs. She jumped and let out a soft giggle. I climbed back up on the bed and started in on her other side with my other hand and she began laughing and wiggling uncontrollably.

"Edward, stop we're going to wake up Seth again." She said through squeals and giggles. She fell back and scooted down on the bed where I was just about hovering over her. My heart started pounding realizing the position we were in. I quickly stopped and fell to my side still smiling though. She turned her head to look at me and we had this long moment of looking into each other's eyes intently. I wanted to kiss her, but I didn't know if she was ready for that or if I was. I only planned on helping her, not falling for her.

"I probably should head home, it's getting late." I said, sitting up.

"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow then?" She asked.

"I'll be here." I gave her a reassuring smile and walked towards the window. She followed me over like usual to shut the window behind me. Once there, I turned around to say goodbye and pulled her in for a hug which she returned, then I lightly kissed her forehead.

"Goodnight Bella." I said smiling.

I saw her take a deep breath before saying goodnight also. I looked back once more giving her another smile, and then descended the tree.


	11. Chapter 10

I forgot to mention a few things when I posted this last night. So as far as the reason for Bella getting beat that I asked for suggestions for, there were a few really good suggestions, but ultimately it was my husband who came up with the idea for me. Apparently the hair clogging the drain is the one thing that drives him nuts about me lol, so I thought it was a great, ridiculous thing that James would get mad about. So I guess my husband gets the credit for this chapter, but really he gets credit for so much more because he's the one I run ideas off of and try to piece everything that is going on in my head together.

Thanks everyone for all the great reviews and adding my story to favorites and alerts, it means so much to me. I can't even begin to tell you all how happy I get when I see a new review.

I don't own twilight or it's characters.

* * *

**More Than That: Backstreet Boys**

I can see that you've been cryin'  
You can't hide it with the light  
What's the use in you denying  
That what you had is wrong

I heard him promise you forever  
But forever's come and gone  
Baby he would say whatever  
It takes to keep you alive, to ensure between the lines

Ohh I will love you more than that  
I won't say the words then take them back  
Don't give loneliness a chance  
Baby listen to me when I say  
I will love you more than that

Baby you deserve much better  
What's the use in holding on?  
Don't you see its now or never  
Caus' I just can't be friends  
Baby knowing in the end

That I will love you more than that  
I won't say the words then take them back  
Don't give loneliness a chance  
Baby listen to me when I say

There's not a day that passes by  
(I don't wonder why we haven't tried)  
It's not too late to change your mind  
(So take my hand don't say goodbye)

I will love you more than that  
I won't say the words and take them back  
Ohh I will love you more than that  
I won't say the words and take them back  
Don't give loneliness a chance  
Baby listen to me when I say

I will love you more...  
Ohh I will love you more than that  
I won't say the words and take them back  
Don't give loneliness a chance  
Baby listen to me when I say  
I will love you more than that.

**BPOV**

He kissed me. Did he actually kiss me? I could still feel the surge of electricity and warmth from when his lips touched my skin. I was sure I was going to stop breathing the moment he kissed my forehead, but I took a deep breath and mustered up all the vigor I had left to tell him goodbye.

These last few weeks had been wonderful, I couldn't deny the closeness I had with Edward, and I couldn't possibly understand why I felt so safe around him, even Seth and Leah felt it. He had become a constant fixture in our lives within a short amount of time and I didn't want to let that go.

I knew deep down that the only reason he was here was because he felt a responsibility to help us or protect us. But now I feel like maybe he isn't just here to help us, maybe he was here for me too. I knew it was silly and futile to even imagine that it could be possible, but I wanted it to be.

I fell back on my bed the minute he was to the ground and walking back through the woods. I laid there for quite a while thinking of what this meant. Did it even mean anything? Maybe he was only being nice, or maybe it meant nothing. By the time I had finally fell asleep, I had convinced myself that a kiss on the forehead was nothing more than a simple friendly gesture. That's all Edward saw me as, was a friend and I was okay with that. I liked having him as a friend.

For the rest of the weekend, when he would come over, he spent a lot of time with Seth teaching him the guitar or reading to him, and when Seth would be ready for bed he never stayed long after that. Things changed and he was distant. I wanted to ask him what was wrong, if I had done something wrong, but I was afraid what might happen; so I didn't say anything.

On Monday morning, when I was busy making breakfast, I heard James yell down the stairs for me to come up. I felt the sudden rush of fear travel all through my body. My mouth became dry and my heart started pounding. I walked up the stairs slowly, knowing that whatever this was about, it was not going to be good. Once I got to the top of the stairs and stepped towards the bathroom door, I could see the anger flooding his face.

"What the hell is this?" He interrogated, grabbing my arm tightly and dragging me into the small bathroom. I looked around and tried to figure out what exactly it was I was supposed to see. He grabbed my hair, yanking me down to my knees in front of the bathtub. On the way down to the floor, I hit my nose on the side of the tub and I felt the blood begin dripping down my lip.

"Do you see all that hair that you left in the tub?" He asked, still pulling on my hair. "Do you see how it's plugging up the drain? I do not want to take a shower with all that matted hair all over the sides. That's disgusting Bella, I should chop that ugly mess of hair off your head right now."

"Please, I'll clean it, I'll fix it." I pleaded with him. I know it was only hair but I liked my hair. I know I have a lot of it and it was long and thick and probably just as he said, an ugly mess, but it helped shield me and I didn't want him to cut it.

"Yes you will, I want this entire bathroom spotless, as well as the rest of the house by the time I get home tonight."

"It will, I promise." He let go of my hair with one last pull, grabbed my arm, pulling me up to a standing position, and shoved me into the wall. The towel rack was pushing squarely into the middle of my back and to make it worse, he shoved me into it even harder so I would feel the pain even more.

"Since you are such a clumsy imbecile and you gave yourself a bloody nose, I guess you won't be going to school today either. You should have plenty of time to finish," He asserted. He let go of me and sauntered down the steps to eat breakfast.

I took a deep breath, grabbed a towel to put pressure on my bleeding nose and followed him down to the kitchen. I found the toast had browned a little bit too much and the scrambled eggs were burning in the pan. I rushed to the stove to try and repair what was left of breakfast but it was pointless.

"Well, since you can't even cook breakfast right today, I think it's a good thing you are staying home." He taunted standing behind me looking over my shoulder. "I'll get something on my way to work, but you and the kids can eat that." He grabbed his lunch box off the counter and walked out of the house.

I let out a heavy sigh after he was gone and collapsed to floor. Leah and Seth came rushing in to find me and I tried to push what had happened aside, letting them think I was fine.

"Should I call Edward?" Leah asked.

"No, you know dad looks at the phone records, it will show up and he'll ask who it is that we're calling." I explained. "I'm fine really. Just eat some breakfast and then get to school. I'm staying home today."

**EPOV**

After I kissed Bella on the forehead, I felt a jolt of electricity run through me. I had never felt that before and it kind of scared me. What was this that was going on between Bella and me? We weren't dating or in any type of relationship, we were barely friends, but I couldn't help the urge to want to kiss her more than just on her forehead. I wanted to do so much more than just kiss her but at the same time, it felt so wrong even thinking that of Bella. For weeks she was the only thing that filled my every thought, my every dream, everything I did was about her. I thought it was because I wanted to protect her but now I think I'm falling for her. I've never been in love with anyone and I really didn't even know if that was what I was feeling for Bella, but I knew there was some sort of connection there. The only problem was, Bella would never want that, nor does she need to have a relationship with anyone right now. What she needs is to get away from James so she can have a normal relationship with anyone, whether it is me or someone else. But the thought of Bella with someone else made me sick to my stomach and I had a sudden rush of jealousy come over me and I couldn't explain it.

I knew I was getting too close and if I wasn't careful, I would end up hurting her. Leah's words kept ringing in my head and I knew she was right. Bella did like me, it was obvious, but she needed to be safe first and she didn't understand that. I didn't want to give her any false hope that we could have something, because if she wasn't free she could never have anything with me. It would be pointless to try. So when I went over to her house on Saturday and Sunday night I tried to spend most of my time with Seth. It wasn't that I didn't want to spend time with Bella, actually quite the contrary, I wanted to spend all my time with her, but I had to be really careful how fast whatever it was that was going on between us, went. I didn't want to screw things up like Leah had warned.

On Monday morning, I came to school in a piss poor mood, it felt like a really bad day from the moment I got out of bed. I didn't know why though, everything just felt off. I didn't want to talk to anyone, but of course Alice had to be all nosey and want to know the latest on my attempt to help Bella.

"Things are going fine Alice." I replied to her inquiry.

"Well, has she agreed to talk to anyone yet? Have you talked to your parents?"

"Not yet Alice," I replied.

"Edward, I'm not going to stand by and watch much longer while you mess around and Bella gets abused."

"She isn't being abused right now, I see her every day and if there was anything happening, she would tell me." I lied to her but I had my reasons, just over the weekend she told me she got in trouble because of her grades but if Alice knew that, she wasn't going to wait any longer. I needed a little more time with her and I wasn't going to let Alice screw this up.

"Why do I not believe you?"

"Why would you think I would lie about this?" I countered.

"I think that you are getting attached to Bella and maybe even her brother and sister and you are being selfish and wanting to keep them, especially Bella to yourself. Once people find out the truth, things will be different and you are afraid you will lose her." She accused.

"Alice you're crazy." I said.

"Am I?" She raised her eyebrow at me and a small smirk formed on her mouth.

I furrowed my eyebrows at her questioning glare. I opened my mouth to reply but before I could, Jasper came up behind her wrapping his arms around her waist and nibbling on her ear. She giggled and turned around in his arms to kiss him passionately, his hands finding purchase under her shirt at the small of her back. I rolled my eyes and turned back to my locker to get my books.

"So what were you two talking about?" Jasper asked, finally breaking free from the kiss. "It looked kind of intense."

I turned around to face my best friend and mustered up a smile. "Nothing," I replied.

"We were just talking about a girl Edward is in love with." Alice answered with a teasing smiling.

"Really," Jasper questioned with a shocked look on his face. "Is that why you have been so distant to all the guys?"

"Edward has been distant to everyone, except for her."

"So who is the lucky girl, and please don't tell me it's Jessica." Jasper asked almost laughing as he did.

I finally decided to respond to their teasing. "Alice, you need to learn to keep your fucking mouth shut. I warned you what could happen and now here you are prattling on like it's a big joke. Thanks for that, I thought I could trust you."

"Hey, Edward you need to back off. You may be my friend but you have no right to talk to Alice like that." Jasper sneered. stepping in front of Alice to shield her.

"No," Alice mumbled. "He's right, I shouldn't be saying anything. I'm sorry, Edward."

Jasper looked back and forth between the two of us with questioning eyes. "Alright, what the hell is going on between you two? Edward, you have been acting strange for weeks and now Alice too? What happened?"

I huffed, shook my head and walked to my first class. Jasper came in moments after me, still giving me a questioning look but I ignored it. My mind was preoccupied with what Alice had said. Was I really doing what Alice had accused me of? I wasn't saying anything yet because she wasn't ready to talk, not because I was trying to keep her to myself, right? All through first period, I thought about everything that had happened over the last month and questioned everything I did. I didn't want to be the one that was making her stay there; I wanted her to be free from him. But for the first time, I thought about what that might entail. If she was able to get away from him, it might mean that she would have to move away; whether it is, relatives or foster home or whatever it might mean, she would leave. My heart hurt at that thought and I didn't want her to leave, but I couldn't let what I want get in the way of what was best for her. I had to keep telling myself that her needs came first.

I was so wrapped up with my own thoughts; I didn't even hear the bell ring until Jasper tapped me on the shoulder. I stood up and followed him out.

"Hey," Jasper began. "Whatever it is that's going on with you, I hope you get it worked out. I've never seen you like this and I'm not sure I like it, especially when you verbally attack my girlfriend."

"Sorry about that, Jazz. I'm just not in the greatest mood today."

"You haven't been in the greatest mood for weeks." He retorted.

I gave him an apologizing smile and he slapped me on the back.

"So answer me one thing, why is it that Alice knows about this mystery girl and you have yet to tell your best friend anything about it?" Jasper asked. "And what's with the secret anyway? Does she go to this school? Is it someone I know? Are you dating an older woman? She doesn't have kids does she? Please tell me she isn't married already?"

"Jazz, just stop," I said, raising my hands to stop him. "It isn't that big of a mystery, it's just not something I'm ready to plaster all over school and I don't even know what it is that's going on. I'm still trying to figure that out myself."

"Well how does Alice know?" He wondered.

"She just figured it out you know how she is about these types of things. She's very perceptive."

"Yeah, that's why she hates Jessica. You don't know how many times I had to listen to her go on and on about how wrong she was for you. For a while I started to wonder if she had a thing for you and when I asked her about it she got all mad at me for even suggesting such a thing."

"Well I'm glad about that," I said with a chuckle. He began to laugh at how ridiculous it sounded.

"I've got to get to class, but we should hang out sometime." Jasper suggested, turning to walk away. I nodded my head and headed down the hall to my next class.

"Edward," I heard Alice yell down the hall. I was tempted to ignore her and keep walking but she caught up to me and yanked on my arm.

I flipped around rolling my eyes. "What do you want now Alice."

"Edward," she began breathlessly. She looked worried, scared, concerned… My heart started racing and my mind went straight to Bella. "She's not in school today, I went to the office and they said that her dad called in saying she was sick. I'm worried."

She wasn't sick, she was fine last night. She doesn't ever miss school. There was only one thing I could think of, something was wrong. I had to get to her as fast as I could. I ran down the hallway pushing and shoving my way through the crowd, until I came to the doors leading outside. I rushed to my car and jumped in, speeding off down the street. I wanted to go straight there but I knew I couldn't do that, so I went home; first calling Emmett as I drove.

"Hello," Emmett answered on the second ring.

"Emmett," I said breathless. "Is James at work today?"

"He's in his office. What's wrong? Do you need to talk to him?" Emmett questioned.

"NO," I shouted. "I was just curious." I tried to even out my breathing, to not raise suspicion but it was too late.

"Edward something is wrong, tell me what's going on?"

"Nothing, I'm fine," I said, reassuring him.

"Why did you want to know if James was at work? Does this have something to do with Bella?"

"Why would you think that?"

"Edward, you don't have to play dumb with me, I know you have a thing for the chief's daughter and I know you are keeping it from him. I understand why too, I'm sure he is very protective of her and after he stopped you the other day for speeding, I don't think that was the greatest first impression you could have made. It's definitely not going to gain you any points."

"You haven't mentioned this to him have you?" I asked, fearful of what his answer was going to be..

"Of course not, what kind of brother do you think I am?"

"Good," I let out a breath I didn't realize I had been holding. "Please don't say anything." I pleaded.

"I won't, but I think it might be a good idea for you to talk to him. He's really not that bad of a guy." Oh if he only knew, I thought to myself.

"Yeah, maybe eventually I will." I replied.

"So, what's with the inquiry of James' work hours, and why aren't you in school?" Emmett asked.

"I am at school," I lied. "We're in between classes right now. Bella didn't come to school today and I was worried about her."

"I'm sure she's fine, she probably just has the flu or something."

"You're probably right. I've got to go." I said quickly before hanging up.

I got to my house by the time I hung up with Emmett and parked my car in the garage. I dashed through the woods as fast as I could, falling a few times and getting my shirt snagged on a branch, ripping it a little at the shoulder. I reached her house within minutes and went straight to the front door, ringing the doorbell obsessively.

She finally opened it slowly, once she saw me standing there, out of breath, her eyes bulged out and she pulled me in the house, by grabbing the front of my shirt. She looked around to make sure no one saw me, before shutting the door.

"What are you doing?" She asked, still shocked by my presence.

Once I saw her, I began to calm down a little. I was still out of breath from the run but my anxiety and fears were subsiding.

"You weren't at school?" I questioned, looking her over for the first time for signs of abuse.

She lowered her head and I caught a glimpse of a bruise at the top of her nose. I rushed to her side and raised her face to examine it myself. "What did he do?" I whispered, the anxiety rising again in my chest.

"Nothing, it was my fault." She answered trying to pull away from me.

"Bella, don't lie to me."

"It's nothing Edward; I had a bloody nose that's all."

"How did you get a bloody nose?" I pressed.

She turned away from me and began to cry.

"Please, Bella, talk to me." I reached out to her hand, trying to pull her back to me. "What did he do?"

"It was my fault; I knew the drain was clogged. I was planning to clean it."

"He gave you a bloody nose because of a clogged drain?" I asked in disbelief.

"No, I fell and hit my nose on the side of the tub when he pushed me down to look at the drain."

"Bella," I gasped.

"It's nothing, really, it was my fault. I should have put my hands out to catch myself."

"No, Bella, don't you dare blame any of this on yourself. You are not responsible for what he did to you." I yelled. "I'm not letting him do this anymore.

"Edward, please don't." She begged.

I started pacing the floor and pulling my hair. "I have to get you out of here, right now."

She started shaking her head and begging me with her eyes not to.

"Bella, I can't do this anymore." I confessed. "I can't stand by and watch him hurt you."

"Nobody asked you to." She yelled.

I stopped in my tracks to look at her, shocked by what she was saying.

"Nobody asked you to be here, to do anything. I have been telling you for weeks now, to let it go and to leave me alone, but you won't." She whimpered.

The hurt and fury I felt when she said that, was unbearable. "How can you say that? I'm the only one who has ever tried to help you."

"I never asked for help, Edward. I never wanted you to be here." She cried.

The knife in my heart kept going deeper and deeper, with every word she spoke.

"If you had never been so pushy about that stupid dance, none of this would have ever happened. I don't want to do this either. I never wanted this. I don't need you." The tears were streaming down her face and I was fighting to hold back my own. I wanted to go to her and brush the tears away and hold her in my arms, to tell her everything will be okay and we'll make it through this and I'll be here no matter what. But I was frozen in my spot on the floor. All I could do was stare at her with a blank look on my face.

I finally, blinked the tears away from my own eyes and reached for her but she pushed me away. "Just leave, Edward." She said through sobs.

I pulled away and walked slowly to the door, still listening to the deafening sounds of her crying. I reached for the door knob but stopped, turning back around to look at her one more time. She looked so helpless, so scared, I knew deep down she didn't really want me to leave, that she needed me just as much as I needed her. It was now or never, I thought to myself. "Do you even know why I come here every night?" I asked walking a few steps towards her. She took a sharp intake of breath, stopping her sobs briefly, when she looked up towards me. "Do you know why I want to help you, why I _need_ to help you?"

"I don't know, because it's your nature, because you have this younger brother syndrome to always live up to your older brother, because you want to be the hero?" She shrugged her shoulders, looking confused. "You tell me. Why would you possibly want to help someone like me?" She spurted out, showing me a small sign of confidence for the first time since I had come to really know her.

I shook my head in disbelief and stifled a laugh at the humor in all of this. I looked back at her tear streaked face, looking deep into her beautiful dark eyes. "No, it's because I love you."

I could hear her breath catch, when the words left my mouth. She stared at me with a shocked expression, shaking her head. I slowly walked closer to her never breaking our eye contact. I stopped in front of her, placing my hands on each side of her face, gently rubbing the tears off her cheeks with my thumbs. "I love you, Bella. Please don't push me away." I breathed softy. I gently pulled her face up and met her lips with mine. The kiss was soft and gentle. I could sense her hesitation and nervousness, so I pulled away allowing her to adjust to what had just happened. I placed my forehead to hers and brushed the new tears that were forming, away from her cheeks.

We stood like this for a few minutes, reconnecting in a way we had never been or were fully aware of. I told her that I loved her, I didn't even know what love was, let alone know whether I loved her or not. How could I possibly love her? We weren't in that type of a relationship and I had no intention of this ever going that far. I wanted to help, not fall in love. But when I said it, it felt right, it came out naturally. I didn't have to think or question my feelings for her, it was just there. I had no idea if she even felt the same way or if she ever would, but she didn't try to push me away this time and the realization of everything that happened made her body begin to shake. She looked completely exhausted, so I reached down putting my hands behind her knees and her shoulders cradling her in my arms, as I carried her upstairs to her room. I placed her on her bed and she pulled me down with her.

"Stay with me?" She begged, breathlessly.

"Always, Bella," I promised, lying down on the bed next to her and pulling her close to me. She nestled into my chest and wrapped her free arm around my waist. We lay there in complete silence for the rest of the day, as I brushed my fingers through her hair and left small kisses on top of her head, showing her all my love, wordlessly. At some point she fell asleep, I could hear her heavy, rhythmic breathing and soft whispers while she slept. I spent the day trying to figure out what had happened. I still didn't understand why I said it, maybe it was just to get her to trust me, and maybe I thought it was the only way to get her to listen to me. The only thing I could really understand is that I did care about her a lot and I was attracted to her, that was obvious, she was beautiful, but what was love really?

I began to think of ways to convince her to leave, to get away from him. I had some ideas and if I could get her to agree to any of them, I knew it would take her away from me forever and that hurt more than anything, but I was willing to make that sacrifice if it meant she was safe. I needed her to be safe.

At three o'clock, I heard movement downstairs and at first, I feared it may be James, until I heard the voices of Leah and Seth coming up the stairs. They came to Bella's room and knocked softly before entering.

"Edward," Leah asked with concerned eyes.

"It's okay Leah, she's okay," I whispered, letting her know that she didn't need to be afraid. "Can you both go down stairs?" I asked. "I'll be down in a minute." They both nodded their heads and left the room.

After a few seconds of making sure they hadn't woke her up, I slipped out from under her. She mumbled my name and reached out her hand. I leaned down and kissed her on the cheek. "I'll be right back, I'm not going far." She curled up on the pillow, and went back to sleep.

I headed downstairs to see Seth and Leah, who both had already started on cleaning the house. I figured this must have been routine for them because they seemed to know exactly what needed to be done.

"Leah, do you know what happened to Bella this morning." I asked.

She stopped mopping the floor and looked up at me. "She didn't tell you"

"She told me a little, but not much."

"Dad got mad because the drain in the tub was plugged with hair." She explained. "He told her to fix it and he wanted the entire house spotless by the time he got home tonight." Great I had distracted her and now the house was nowhere near being done, which was going to cause him to beat her again, if I didn't do something about it.

"What time does he get home?" I asked.

"A little after six," Leah responded.

"Okay, I'm going to need your help. Do you think you could handle making dinner?" I asked.

"I can do that." She answered, with a spark of excitement in her eyes.

"I'm going to go upstairs and try to fix the drain. Seth, do you want to help me?" A huge grin spread across his face, as he nodded his head vigorously. We headed upstairs and I found that Bella had already done most of the work. I pulled out the gunk that was clogging up the drain, scrubbed the tub and shower walls. Seth washed the mirror and the sink and then we both mopped the floor. We went downstairs and were engulfed in the smells of a pot roast cooking in the kitchen. I helped them with the rest of the cleaning of the house and I was rather impressed at how well Seth, Leah and I did.

When we were done, which really took no time at all with all of us working together, I went back to Bella's room to check on her. I kneeled down next to the bed watching her breath in and out for a few moments, she was laying on her stomach in blue sweatpants and a black tank top, I reached down and brushed a couple strands of hair out of her face and noticed she had a slight smile on her lips. I couldn't help but smile also. I noticed a small brushing of freckles on her shoulder and I instinctively raised a finger and traced the lines that they made. My fingertips brushed down her arm and to her hand. I picked up her hand and gently kissed each of her fingertips. Her shirt was pulled up a little in the back exposing a small bit of skin and I noticed a shadow of a bruise. I reached over and I knew it was probably wrong but I lifted the back of her shirt a little and saw the extent of the bruise. It was just about across the entire width of her back. I winced and gritted my teeth at the sight of it. It looked painful; I wanted to make it go away. I gently brushed across it with a finger, but Bella jumped slightly and her breath caught in her sleep. I was afraid that I had awakened her, but her eyes were still closed and her breathing returned to its normal rhythmic sound. I pulled her shirt back down and left on more kiss on her forehead before I got up and left the room.

Around five, I sat down at the table with Seth and Leah to help with their homework. After a while, I heard Bella come running down the stairs in a panic. I jumped up from the table, to go see what was wrong and when I found her she was standing at the bottom of the stairs, looking around confused by what she saw.

"Bella, are you okay?" I asked, walking towards her.

She looked up at me confused. "Did you do this?" She wondered.

"Do what, clean the house?" I asked and she nodded. "We all did, we made sure everything he asked was done. The drain is fixed, the bathroom is clean, laundry folded and put away, dishes cleaned, floors vacuumed and mopped, Leah even got dinner started, everything is taken care of." She sighed and a slight smile spread across her face and her eyes filled with tears. "Bella, what's wrong?"

"I can't believe you did all this, I don't understand why you stay." She cried.

I smiled and pulled her to me. "You know why I stay."

"I don't deserve this, I don't deserve you."

"Bella, you deserve so much more and I plan to make sure it happens."

She looked up at me and smiled. I leaned down and kissed her on the forehead pulling her closer to me.

"I should probably go before your dad gets home."

"Oh, right," she said, pulling away from me, biting her bottom lip. She looked scared and worried.

"Bella, it's okay, everything is done, he won't hurt you, and if you need me I'm not far away, so just call and I'll be here." She nodded her head, taking a deep breath into her lungs. I thought she was worried about James coming home but I was starting to wonder if her fear was more related to me.

We walked to the door and once there I turned back towards her, seeing the same worried look on her face, she wouldn't even look me in the eyes.

"I probably won't be able to come over tonight." I began. "When I left school today I didn't exactly think about getting excused so I'm sure my parent's know I skipped today so I'll probably be grounded again and have to listen to a long lecture about my future." I rolled my eyes.

"Okay, that's fine." She said, nodding her head. "Thank you for everything you did today."

"You're welcome. You know whatever you need, I'll be here." I leaned into her ear to whisper. "And you don't have to do anything you aren't ready for." I kissed her cheek, and watched her blush; I gave her a light smile then left out the front door.

When I got home like I suspected, both my parents were standing at the doorway waiting for me to walk in. They had been calling my phone all afternoon and I'm sure they were panicking considering my car was home but I wasn't. I did send them a text around 4 letting them know I was fine and I would explain later, hoping that I would be able to come up with some sort of lie to tell them where I was, but I still had not come up with an explanation.

I walked into the house and sat on the couch waiting for the lecture. They both stared at me dumbfounded not saying a word. So I decided to begin.

"I know what you are going to say," I began. "Skipping school does not look good on my record and that if you want to get into a good college you have to prove that you want to be there."

"Edward, I don't know what to do with you anymore." I father finally spoke. "You have always been a good kid, we have never had any trouble with you, and now all of a sudden you are becoming some juvenile delinquent."

"A juvenile delinquent," I laughed, and looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "Dad please, I haven't done anything that bad. I skipped class for a day it's not the end of the world."

"You were also caught drinking, you punched out a kid on the football field, and I'm not sure if you realize all I had to do so you wouldn't get kicked off the team. You have been in a horrible mood for weeks, taking it out on me and your mother, even Emmett. And don't think I don't know that you are sneaking out sometimes at night."

My head shot up and my eyes were wide, he knew that I was sneaking out, this was not good.

"We just want to know what's going on." My mom asked, in a much calmer voice than my dad.

I sighed and ran my hands over my face and through my hair. I was trying to stall for time in hopes that something that I could tell them would pop into my head. But there was nothing. "It's hard to explain." I replied.

"I suggest you start explaining unless you want to be grounded." My dad threatened. I think I would rather be grounded then have to explain, I couldn't explain without telling them everything and even though I hated not telling them I made her a promise that I wouldn't say anything until she was ready. "Seriously Edward, we've never had any problems like this with you."

"Maybe that's the problem," I shouted.

"What's that supposed to mean?" He questioned, with a look of anger on his face.

"Maybe I'm tired of doing everything I'm told to and living up to everyone's expectations." I said, still shouting.

"So what now you're going to be all defiant?" He asked, in the same angry tone as I had.

"No, I just want to live my life, make my own decisions for once," I said. "I'm so tired of having everything planned out for me and being decided without ever asking me what I want."

"Fine, if that's what you want, make your own decisions, screw up your future like Emmett did, but don't plan on coming home and getting a hand out from us when you mess up."

"Of course, you learned from that mistake right?" I countered. "God forbid I end up anything like Emmett."

"Edward that's not what your father means," my mom finally spoke up.

"That's exactly what he means mom," I disagreed. "You both have had everything in our lives planned out, from what extracurricular activities we did, to what classes we took, hell I think you both had a hand in why I dated Jessica for all those years when in reality I couldn't stand her. Did you ever stop to wonder why it was Emmett failed when he went off to college? Did you ever question that it might have been your fault?"

"How could you say it was our fault?" My dad asked, still very angry. "Your mother and I have always done everything to make sure both you boys were well taken care of and given every opportunity."

"And that's the problem, dad." I declared. "We were never given the opportunity to make any choices for ourselves and for the first time when Emmett was given the chance to decide something for himself, he messed up. And now you won't ever let him live it down, even though he's doing so great now and is doing something worthwhile and important, but you both still look at him like a disappointment."

"That's not true, Edward." My mom said.

"Edward, we don't see Emmett as a disappointment. We just want the best for you and for him and want you both to succeed." My dad explained. I huffed and rolled my eyes.

"This still doesn't explain why you skipped school today." My mom questioned.

"I was helping someone." I said quietly.

"Helping them with what," my mom asked, sitting down next to me.

"I can't really say but this person was in trouble and needed help."

"So you've been sneaking out at night to help this person?" My dad asked also sitting down in the chair across from me.

I looked at him trying to decide what to say without saying too much.

"Edward, if someone is in trouble you need to tell us so we can help." My mom suggested. "Is this the same person you told me about in the locker room?" She asked.

I shook my head yes but stopped talking all together before I said too much.

"So what's going on?" My dad asked. "You said this person is in trouble. Is there anything we can do?"

"Edward sometimes it's best to talk when someone is in trouble. You can't hold that in forever." My mom added.

"I don't want to talk about this anymore." I said slouching down on the couch, crossing my arms across my chest. My parents shared a look that said they were not sure what to do.

"Fine, I don't want you skipping anymore and I want you home every day right after school until I decide what to do with you." My dad said. I stood up to head up stairs. "Edward," he called, as I reached the bottom step. "Whatever it is that you're doing when you skip and sneak out better not be something illegal."

I shook my head in understanding and headed to my room. It went a lot better than I expected but I still decided to not go out that night. If they knew I was sneaking out they very well could follow me. I had to be a little stealthier if I wanted to continue to see her. I expected them to give me some long lecture on the importance of school and toeing the line so I could get into a good college and do better than Emmett. It wasn't that they weren't proud of where Emmett was now but they were disappointed in his choices once he got to college and were not real happy with the way he acted when he came home. They wanted better for him and they wanted better for me, I knew that. They were happy that I had such an interest in football but they didn't want that to be my only outcome like it was for Emmett, so I had to do my best in school, take all the advanced classes, and be involved in as many activities that would be beneficial to my future. I know they meant well but a lot of their hovering was overwhelming. I felt like all my life I had been trying to live up to Emmett but my parent's saw it as I needed to learn from his mistakes and not make the same ones. I'm sure with the way I had been acting recently they were seeing my brother all over again.

All night I wondered whether Bella was okay. Did we do a good enough job? Was everything up to his standards? Did he have some other excuse to beat her? I tossed and turned and when I finally did fall asleep I dreamt of her, her eyes, her hair, her freckles, the bruises, and the scars, all of her. But then I saw James standing over her and not letting me anywhere near her. She cowered to the ground and covered her head with her arms, just like she did that first day when I got her out of class and I scared her. I tried to reach out for her but I couldn't reach her and James just stood there and laughed. When I woke up in a cold sweat, I was almost in tears thinking of what I was going to have to do, but until then I wanted to spend every moment with her, I didn't want to waste any time I had left with her.

When I got to school, I went straight to Ms. Cope's office; she needed to do one more thing for me.

"Ms. Cope, I need your help again."

"Oh no, Edward," She grumbled, putting the stack of papers she had down on the table forcefully. "I can't keep giving you free passes to skip class."

"No, that's not what I need Ms. Cope."

"Oh, okay well what is it then?" She asked, digging through the mess of stuff on her desk, looking for something.

"I need to change some of my classes."

"Edward, I don't know if I can do that, you need these credits to graduate."

"I'm not saying change them completely, I just need to take them at different times."

"I see, and why do you want to do that?" She asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I just do and I need you to help me."

"This wouldn't have anything to do with a certain brunette girl you came in here with a few weeks ago, would it?"

"It could," I agreed, with a slight smile. "Can you help or not?"

"Well, seeing as you have the upper hand here, I don't see how I can refuse. Let me see what I can do." She started typing away on her computer.

"Thanks Ms. Cope, you don't know how much I appreciate this."

I told her the classes I needed to change and thankfully I was able to get into all but two of the same classes as Bella. I would have to take P.E. without her, which was fine, and I would have to take advanced photography. This class I was actually looking forward to. I had taken a basic photography class when I was a freshman and I really enjoyed it but my parents thought it would be best to take electives that would be more beneficial to my future, so there were no fun electives after that.

I walked down the hall to my new history class, as I walked in, the one and only person I noticed was Bella. She looked at me with a stunned expression. I concealed a smile and gave my class schedule to the teacher, before taking my seat in the back of the room next to her.


	12. Chapter 11

So what did everyone think of New Moon? I loved it and going back to see it again as much as possible. This chapter is my longest so far, hope it's not too much. Thanks Bzeemomof4 for editing it so quickly.

Thanks everyone for the reviews and adding this story to favorites and alerts. I love reading what everyone thinks.

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or its characters.

* * *

**Realize: Colbie Caillat**

Take time to realize,  
That your warmth is. Crashing down on in.  
Take time to realize,  
That I am on your side  
Didn't I, Didn't I tell you.

But I can't spell it out for you,  
No it's never gonna be that simple  
No I cant spell it out for you

If you just realize what I just realized,  
Then we'd be perfect for each other  
And will never find another  
Just realize what I just realized  
We'd never have to wonder if  
We missed out on each other now.

Take time to realize  
Oh-oh I'm on your side  
Didn't I, didn't I tell you.  
Take time to realize  
This all can pass you by

But I can't spell it out for you,  
No its never gonna be that simple  
No I can't spell it out for you.

If you just realize what I just realized  
Then we'd be perfect for each other  
And we'll never find another  
Just realize what I just realized  
We'd never have to wonder if  
We missed out on each other but.

It's not the same  
No it's never the same  
If you don't feel it to.  
If you meet me half way  
If you would meet me half way.  
It could be the same for you.

If you just realize what I just realized  
Then we'd be perfect for each other  
And we'll never find another  
Just realize what I just realized  
We'd never have to wonder  
Just realize what I just realized

If you just realize what I just realized

Oh

Missed out on each other now  
Missed out on each other now

Realize  
Realize  
Realize

**BPOV**

When Edward walked into my class that morning, I was shocked. I didn't understand what he was doing or why he was here. I never had a chance to ask him in class, why he was there, he just sat in the seat across from me giving me a sly smile. I looked over at him many times during the hour to try and get his attention in hopes he could give me some sort of clue why he was here but he never looked over at me, at least never when I was looking at him. After class was over, I lingered behind in hopes that he would stay behind but he left quickly without even glancing my way. Obviously he was still keeping up appearances.

I went straight to my next class, which was American Literature, and wondered if I would see him walk into this class too, but he didn't. Part of me had hoped that maybe he would but another part of me was scared to death of what was going on between us.

We had been reading "The Great Gatsby" in class and today was our first day of watching the movie. I was looking forward to seeing this movie, since I never watched many movies at home. After reading the book and liking it, I thought watching the movie would be great. The only problem was I couldn't focus on the movie at all, my mind wandered to Edward and what he had said yesterday. I was thankful for everything he did, but I was worried about depending on him too much. I already felt like I couldn't live without him. I needed him to survive. He gave me a reason to go on, to keep fighting. I always thought that I would be able to endure whatever I had to for Seth and Leah's sake, but now, I wasn't so sure. I felt like I need Edward to be able to survive; I couldn't do it on my own anymore, and that was scarier than anything I have ever had to go through. He said that he loved me and then he kissed me. It was soft and sweet and scary but at the same time; the most wonderful thing that had ever happened. I didn't know what to think of it or what to do next and to be honest, I wasn't sure I wanted this. I could never have a real relationship with him; I could never actually love him back, the way he deserved. He was giving me so much but I never gave anything back to him.

By the time third period came along, my thoughts were everywhere and I didn't even notice when Edward walked in and was sitting up front. I was surprised to see him once again in one of my classes but I tried to ignore it. There had to be some sort of logical explanation.

At lunch, I sat down across from Alice and Jasper, they were in the middle of one of their make-out sessions so I tried to be quiet and not disturb them. I took out my book and began to read like always but I could feel his eyes on me watching from across the cafeteria. I looked up once and caught him, I smiled lightly, but he looked as if he was deep in thought, almost as if he were looking right through me. It scared me a little so I didn't look back after that.

Once in my Biology class, I began writing down what the assignment from the day before was so I could be sure to make it up. I never noticed that someone had sat down next to me at the lab table. I was the only one in the class without a lab partner, which is how I preferred to work, since I didn't like having personal connections with anyone. When I finally realized Edward was sitting next to me, I jumped. I stared at him quizzically, until he finally looked over at me with a smirk on his face. The class began and Mr. Banner started going over a lab we were going to be working on for the next few days. I pulled out a piece of paper, not wanting to wait any longer to ask what he was doing.

_Why are you in this class? _I wrote on the paper; then passed it to him.

_I had some of my classes switched around. _He wrote simply; then passed the paper back to me.

_Why did you do that?_

_You said you needed help with Biology, no better way to do that than to actually be here with you._

_But you're in my History and Spanish classes too._

_I am. _He smirked as he passed me the paper.

I huffed and returned my attention back to what was being written on the chalkboard. After a few minutes, he slowly reached for the paper and scribbled something else, I watched him out of the corner of my eye when he did this and I noticed his expression change, he looked worried or sad.

He slid the paper back over too me and I read what he wrote. _Does it bother you that I'm in some of your classes? _

_No, _I wrote.

_Then why do you seem upset?_

_We can talk about it later, I need to pay attention. I got a B remember, it's needs to be an A._

We sat there in complete silence for the rest of the class, every time I would shift or sigh; I noticed he would jerk his head towards me. I tried not to look his way as much as possible but it was hard to do. Everything that was happening between us was only confusing me more.

During last period, I half expected him to show up in that class too, but he didn't. I was grateful though, I had this class with Jessica and I knew if he even looked in my direction, she would notice and start spreading rumors all over school. Edward had warned me about her suspicions already so I had to be extra careful around her.

That night James didn't go out for some reason, so I pulled the paper out of the window and hoped Edward would realize it wasn't there and not come up. It was the first night since he started coming that it hadn't been there. James spent most of the night on the couch watching sports and drinking beers. I had to stay close so when he needed another beer I could get it for him. I did my homework at the kitchen table but I was extremely tense, that focusing on anything was impossible.

The next day was much the same; Edward and I started on our lab in Biology and for the first time we had a little bit of time to talk.

"I came by last night, but the paper wasn't there so I didn't come up," he said, while we placed everything out on our lab table.

"I know, James was home last night," I replied.

He shook his head in understanding and went back to working on the lab.

"Did he hurt you?" He asked, quietly after a few minutes.

"No, he just watched sports and drank beer. Eventually he fell asleep on the couch."

"Are you okay, regardless of whether he hurt you or not?"

"Edward, can we just work on the lab?" I asked. "You said you changed your classes to help me with Biology but you haven't done anything to help yet."

He sighed and went back to working on the lab with me. I wasn't mad at him or upset about anything. I think mostly I was scared. I didn't know how to act around him anymore. We were supposed to be friends; I could handle being friends, but now things were different and even though part of me wanted to believe he could actually love me and he could save us, I knew it was impossible. So like I always did, I tried to push him away.

For the rest of the week, even though James had gone out, I didn't put the paper back in the window. Seth asked repeatedly when Edward was coming but I had to tell him that I wasn't sure if he was going to be coming back. Seth was really upset and locked himself in his bedroom almost every night after dinner. Even Leah seemed upset about it. Although, she would never admit it, I think she liked having him around. I cried almost every night, thinking about him and wanting him here with me, but I had to be strong and let him go, for his sake.

He knew I was pushing him away, he sensed it, when he asked me to meet him in the storage room in the gym; I told him I couldn't because I had to work on an assignment in the computer lab. He looked hurt and confused but he accepted it and said maybe tomorrow. But I never went. By Friday, he wouldn't talk to me or look at me at all. Even while working on our lab, he kept to himself, only talking about the assignment when he had to. It hurt to have to do this to him, I could tell how much it upset him but I didn't know what else to do.

On Saturday morning James left very early, before any of us were up. It was odd for him to be gone on a weekend for work, but I was thankful, weekends were when he was home all day, it seemed to be the times I got beat the most. I spent the morning trying to work on homework that I was getting behind on. I didn't understand it but having Edward in my classes seemed to distract me more than help me. Leah and Seth were playing a game in the living room when there was a knock on the door. I walked over to the window and looked out to see Edward standing on the porch. Seth and Leah went running to the door and opened it before I could stop them. Seth screamed his name and wrapped his arms around his waist. Edward chuckled at his enthusiasm and patted him on the head. Even Leah, had a slight smile on her face when he walked in the door. I stood there frozen wondering what I should do. He looked over at me, with the same hurt and confused look on his face that I had seen all week. He turned back to Seth and Leah and told them to run up stairs and put on some heavy clothes and thick jackets because they were going on an adventure. They both gasped and smiled hugely before running upstairs to get ready. He looked back over at me and walked towards me stopping a few feet away.

"I promised Seth that I would take him to see the ocean," he announced, with a sullen look. "You don't have to come if you don't want to."

"What about James, I don't know where he is, he could be back at any time."

"It's taken care of, he had to go to Jefferson County to help with some official police business," he replied. "My brother is with him and he's going to call me when they head back."

"Did you tell your brother?" I started to panic.

"No," He said quickly. "He knows that there's something going on with us and he thinks that I haven't told your dad about it because I'm afraid he'll try to shoot me. Which he very well may do, but I'm willing to take that risk."

I opened my mouth to say something but he cut me off and took a step closer to me. "I understand why you're pushing me away. I'm sorry about what happened the other day; I never meant to scare you."

Seth and Leah came rushing down the stairs at that moment, all bundled up and ready to go. They looked at me for reassurance.

"It's okay that we go with Edward, right Bella?" Seth asked.

"Yeah, I think it will be fine." I replied.

"What about you, are you coming?" Leah asked, noticing the tension between Edward and I.

Edward looked at me with pleading eyes so I gave in and nodded my head. I noticed the slight smile and soft sigh from Edward as I went to walk up the stairs to get ready. I knew I shouldn't have, but I missed him. I missed spending time with him. I missed talking to him and listening to the stories of his childhood. I missed his touch, and the hope that I saw in his eyes. I missed it all, and I wanted it back regardless of the consequences.

The drive out to the beach was not very long at all and Seth was so excited when we finally got close and he saw where we were going. I couldn't help but smile and feel the joy inside of me at his excitement. It was his and Leah's first time ever seeing the ocean and Edward knew that. I realized that he was giving me one more thing by letting me relive my memory with my mom and sharing that with Seth and Leah.

When we parked in front of the beach, Seth and Leah ran down the path to hit the sand and the water; they were screaming and laughing and enjoying every minute of it, even though it was freezing cold. Edward ran down there and started laughing and screaming with them while I stayed behind a little sitting down on the damp sand. I loved watching the interaction he had with Seth and even Leah, they both looked at him as an older brother and someone who was strong and would protect them no matter what. Someone who could give them something I never could.

While I sat there I started to remember the last time I had been here and could almost picture my mom and I making a sand castle and playing in the water. It hurt to think that I would never see her again and for the first time since her death; I think, I grieved for my mom. I finally understood why she did what she did. I had been so mad at her for years for making the choice to run, but for the first time in my life, I knew why she did it. She wanted this for us, she wanted us to be free and happy, not scared all the time. She sacrificed her life for us to have a normal childhood. I used to think she was so weak but she was strong; she took a stand and tried to give us better. I was the weak one for letting Seth and Leah still endure the pain and hurt that he causes us. I would never be free from him; neither will they. He will always be holding us back and controlling everything we do, there is no way out if we stay. Edward loves me and is willing to help me and give up everything for us to be safe, even though he doesn't have to. While, I am pushing him away when I should be thanking him and trusting him; he keeps pushing and trying, not once giving up. But I have given up on myself. I am not living anymore; all I am doing is surviving. I don't want that for Seth and Leah, I want them to live, and to be happy. It is time for me to take a stand and do something like my mom did and sacrifice everything for them if I have to.

Tears began to run down my face at the realization I came to. I pulled my knees to my chestwhile propping my arms on them, and buried my face in the crook of my elbow.

After a few minutes, I heard someone sit next to me; I knew it was Edward. I could feel the heat he radiated, and smell his scent. He didn't say anything or touch me for a few minutes; he just sat there next to me, keeping me company silently. I finally wiped my tears and tilted my head to look at him. He was staring out on the beach watching the wave's crash in, with a really nice camera hanging from his neck.

"Bella, I understand that you're scared, but I wish you would trust me and let me help you. And just know that I'll never let anything hurt you."

"Edward, I'm really confused and scared of what I'm feeling and I don't know what to do about it," I began. "I feel this huge connection to you and feel safe when I'm with you, but at the same time I'm terrified of it. I've always pushed people away and never let people get too close, even Alice I've pushed away, but since she's had Jasper she hasn't noticed much. I've never let anyone this close to me before and it scares me."

"I don't want you to be scared of me." He looked over at me and looked deep into my eyes. "I'll do whatever you want me to, but I don't want to lose you. I'm afraid of what might happen if I don't do something soon though."

"Did you mean it?" I asked, sitting up a little looking over at him. I wanted to know if what he said that day was real, if it was really how he felt. I wanted him to mean it but I still had so much doubt in my mind about what was going on.

"Mean what?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"When you said that, you love me. Did you mean it?"

He gave a sigh, looking back out at the waves and ran his hands through his hair, pulling it a little.

"Because every time you have ever done anything to make me think that maybe you like me more than just a friend, I find a way to not believe it and justify that it doesn't mean anything, but this time, it's the first time I actually let myself believe that it's possible." He didn't say anything or look back at me and I wondered if this time I was wrong. "It's okay if you didn't, I just want to know."

"I don't know Bella; I don't know what love is. I don't know what it is that I'm supposed to be feeling or what I'm supposed to be doing. I've never loved anyone before. Let alone say it to anyone."

I downcast my eyes to the ground feeling the surge of doubt and pain build up inside of me. I knew I was wrong to even think that he was being serious.

"What I do know," he began turning his entire body towards me. "Is that I care about you a lot, I want to spend every minute with you, when we're not together I miss you like crazy, I spend all night thinking about you and dreaming of you. All I think about is kissing you again, and most importantly I have to keep you safe. If I never do anything else in my life I have to do that."

I nodded my head in understanding, but I felt a little disappointed by his words. I didn't know what love was either or if I loved him or not, or if I wanted him to feel that way about me but it still stung a little.

"I know that I feel the same connection with you that you feel and maybe it's only because we've spent so much time together, I don't know, but I would like to see where this goes. I want us both to figure this out together. If you're willing to try and trust that I'm not going anywhere." He asked as he looked over at me almost looking sad.

I leaned in to him and gently brushed my lips across his then pulled away fast. "I trust you, and I want you to help us," I whispered, looking deeply in his eyes, offering him the only thing I could.

He smiled, reached up and brushed my cheek with his fingers and slid his hand behind my neck, pulling me too him for another kiss. I had no idea what I was doing so I let him lead, I moved my lips with his trying to do it right. He deepened the kiss and pulled me even closer to him, he brushed across my lips with his tongue and I froze, not sure what I was supposed to do. I'd seen Alice and Jasper kiss enough times, I should know how to do this but it was different to actually experience it yourself.

"Eww, why are you kissing my sister like that?" Seth asked, walking up to us. We pulled away from each other to look up at Seth, who was caked with sand. We both started laughing and Edward fell backwards onto the sand still laughing hysterically.

"Seth, what did you do?" I asked, trying to compose myself.

"Leah did it," he said. "She tried to bury me in the sand."

Edward laughed even harder which made me laugh more. "What is it you wanted Seth?"

"I wanted to know if Edward will come build a sand castle with us, like he said he would."

"Aren't you cold?" Edward asked him, sitting back up.

"I'm fine," he said, shrugging his shoulders. "Please Edward, you promised."

"Alright," he stood up brushing the sand off of his pants and put his hand out for me, I took it and he pulled me to my feet. Seth ran out in front of us yelling to Leah that we were coming. Edward laced our fingers together and brought our joined hands up to his mouth, turning them to kiss my knuckles lightly.

We spent another good hour on the beach building a sad looking sand castle in the cold wet sand. Edward took lots of pictures with his camera, which he told me was for school since he was now in a photography class. He refused to use the schools old beat up camera, so he brought his own which looked like a really nice camera. However, he said it wasn't that nice considering he had an even nicer digital one at home but I liked it anyway. He promised that no one would ever see the pictures of us that he was taking, except for him and I. We were even able to take a picture of us together and then a group picture. Edward wasn't sure how that one would turn out considering he had to hold the camera out in front of us himself but I hoped it would. I really wanted to see it and have a memory of this day. When we were finally frozen to the bones, we walked back up to his car and he pulled out blankets for all of us to wrap up in. We climbed back in the car soaked and cold but we didn't care. He turned the heat up full blast as we headed back toward Forks. At the first coffee stand he saw, he stopped and ordered 4 hot chocolates for us to drink on the way back. It was nice to have something to warm us up after spending so much time freezing on the beach.

Once back in Forks, instead of taking us home he drove us to his house, saying that with all the sand we collected, there was no way to hide that from James; we would clean up at his house before he took us home. His parent's were out of town for the day so it would be okay for us to be there. When we walked up, both Seth and Leah were stunned by the massive size of Edward's house; I had seen it before so it wasn't as much of a shock to me. He led us in and guided Seth and Leah up stairs to the bathrooms so they could shower. He gave them both thick robes that were way too big, to put on after they were done so he could throw all the dirty clothes in the washing machine. He grabbed the phone and ordered a pizza then went up stairs to change his clothes. I waited until Seth and Leah were done showering then I went and took one myself. After I was done, I made sure to clean up all the water and sand and hair that were all over the bathrooms. I didn't want Edward to get in trouble for having guests that made such a huge mess all over their house.

"Bella, what are you doing?" Edward asked, coming up behind me, while I was on the floor mopping up the water mess.

"I'm just cleaning up our mess; I don't want your parents to get upset." I replied, turning around to face him.

He rolled his eyes and leaned down pulling me to my feet and cupped my cheek with his hands. "You will not clean anything in this house, ever. Let me take care of you for once." He leaned in and kissed me again softly.

"Are you two going to come down and watch the movie or not? Seth called, from the bottom of the stairs sounding frustrated. We could hear Leah shushing him, and we both started laughing again when we pulled away. We walked hand in hand downstairs and grabbed a plate of pizza then sat down in the living room to watch the movie with them. We cuddled closely together wrapped in a blanket, Edwards arm was wrapped around me protectively, which felt so nice. He got up once to put our clothes in the dryer but came straight back to sitting close to me with his arms around me. I loved this, I loved being this close to him, I love feeling safe and warm in his arms, I love it when I am with him, I don't feel like I have anything to worry about, I love that I feel more comfortable in his home than I do in my own. I knew that soon Edward was going to start asking me to talk to someone again; I expect it and don't know what I am going to do. But right now I just want to feel normal and feel loved. And that's what he does for me.

When the movie ended we noticed that Seth and Leah had fallen asleep curled up in their blankets.

Edward stopped the movie and went to check on our clothes. They were dry so I went up to the bathroom and changed back into my clothes. When I came out Edward was leaning up against the wall waiting for me. I stopped and looked at him wondering what he was doing.

He smirked and pulled away from the wall. "Come on, I'll give you a tour of the house." I took his hand and followed him through the house. He showed me all the bedrooms and the office and eventually we ended up at his room. I walked in looking at all the music he had on his shelf, he also had some sports player's posters on his wall and some model with nothing but a skimpy bikini on, I tried to ignore that one. There was also a shelf with lots of books and movies, a flat screen TV on his wall with some sort of game system connected to it. I thought Seth would love that if he was ever given the chance to play.

"Bella," Edward said from across the room. 'We should talk." I knew this moment was coming; my heart began pounding at those words. He sat down on his large bed and pulled me down next to him.

"The way I see it, since you won't talk to anyone directly, we have two options," he began. "Either I kill him, or I help all of you run."

My brow furrowed. "I can't let you kill him, so that one is out of the question." I said seriously. "And where would we run to?"

"I don't know, but if that's the choice you want to make then I'll figure that out. It's the only thing that makes sense to me Bella, I know it's scary but I can do it."

"Edward I can't run, that's what my mom did and she got caught and lost her life because of it."

"Your mom didn't have the resources or connections I have. I can get you a fake ID and passports, I can put all of you on a plane to anywhere you want to go to start over and he will never find you."

"What about you?" I asked concerned about James blaming him and also terrified of losing him.

"I'll stay here and keep an eye on James," he said. "I'll make sure he doesn't get any leads and go searching for you."

"He'll blame you, and go after you."

"No, he won't, he won't have anything to charge me with, and he won't have any proof. Plus with my brother being a cop, there is no way he's going to try anything stupid."

"But I don't want to leave you." I said quietly.

He pulled my chin up and kissed me gently. "I'll find you eventually. I'll make sure of it." He kissed me again harder and deeper wrapping his hands around my waist to pull me closer. My hands ran up his clothed chest and around his neck twisting their way into his hair. He laid me back on the bed and hovered over me slightly, while we continued to kiss. I was starting to enjoy kissing him and wanted to do it often but then his phone started buzzing in his pocket and he pulled away grunting and cussing under his breath from irritation.

He sat up and pulled his phone out of his pocket answering it without even looking to see who it was.

"Hello," he said, sounding frustrated. "Oh hey... okay... yeah everything's fine... thanks Emmett."

He pushed the button to end the call and looked back at me. "We have to go, that was Emmett and he said they're getting ready to head back."

"Okay," I said, rising to my feet following behind him down stairs. He grabbed the clothes from the dryer while I woke up Seth and Leah. They rushed up stairs to the bathrooms and changed then we headed back to our house so we could beat James there.

We pulled up and I told Seth and Leah to go inside and straighten up a little. They both thanked Edward profusely for the fun day before climbing out and heading up to the house.

"I'm thinking since James had such a long day he won't be going anywhere tonight." I said.

"I kind of figured that," he said, nodding his head in agreement. "Has he been home a lot lately, or was there other reason why the paper wasn't in the window at all this week?"

"I'm sorry," I apologized for my rude behavior during the week. "I just didn't know what to think or what to do. Edward, I'm no one special and I can't offer you or give you anything and I'm terrified that I'm going to get you into trouble somehow and that you'll end up hurt and that's my worst fear, I can't let that happen." I rambled.

"Bella," he interrupted placing a finger on my lips. "It's okay, I understand. And you are special. But one thing you can give me is stop pushing me away. Let me be a part of your life, like you're a part of mine."

I lowered my head at how I must have hurt him. He reached over and pulled my chin back up to look at him. "Can I tell you something, without you getting freaked out or feel like you need to respond in any way?" I nodded hesitantly, wondering if I really did want to hear whatever he was going to tell me.

He leaned in and gave me a kiss on the cheek before leaning into my ear to whisper. "When I said that I loved you, it felt right." I smiled and pulled away to look at him and he smiled back. "Think about what I said, and then let me know what you want to do."

"I will," I replied, knowing exactly what it was he was referring to. I needed to decide how I was going to get away from James, how I was going to protect my family. I was going to do it this time, I wasn't going to get scared and chicken out. And I knew that whatever I decided, Edward would be there to support us and keep us safe, no matter what. "Thank you for today, for everything. You have no idea how much today meant to them and me."

He smiled and leaned in to kiss me briefly. "There's no need to thank me, I had just as much fun as they did if not more." We kissed again, longer and deeper before we pulled away and said goodbye.

When I got in the house, I quickly started dinner but was so overwhelmed and excited with everything that had happened I didn't hear James come in. I was at the sink peeling potatoes when all of a sudden I felt a hand push me out of the way. I stumbled and fell to the ground. He just looked down at me with disgust and irritation before he washed his hands and got a drink of water. I was worried at first that maybe he knew what we had done that day but he didn't say anything or push me anymore before he headed up stairs to take a shower. I took it as his normal behavior and not because he was mad about something specific.

After dinner he went straight to bed not saying a word to any of us. On Sunday, he left again and was gone all day. Unfortunately, he was home again all night so Edward wasn't able to come over. I was so worried that he would think I was pushing him away again, but on Monday when he walked into first period, I made sure to look at him and smile, which he returned so I knew everything was okay. We still kept our distance around school but during Biology we were able to talk a little bit while working on our lab. It wasn't the same though. I wanted to be alone with him.

That night James left after dinner, I wasted no time putting the signal in the window. About an hour after James had been gone, Edward showed up and pulled himself through the window. Of course Seth was waiting, and ran to him as soon as he saw him wrapping his arms around his waist, not giving me a chance to greet him first. He looked over and me and laughed when he reached down and pulled Seth off of him.

"Did you bring the guitar?" Seth asked, excitedly.

"Sorry Seth, I can't stay long tonight." My smile fell when he said he couldn't stay long. I wondered why and if something was wrong. "I need to talk to Bella alone for a little bit, but I'll come and say goodbye before I leave okay."

"Okay," Seth said, cheerfully before running off to his room.

I stood in my spot on the other side of the room not able to move out of fear of what he was going to say. I had a feeling it was something bad.

As soon as Seth was gone and shut the door, Edward practically ran across the room pulling me into his arms and kissing me hard almost knocking the wind out of me. There was an urgency and almost panic about it which scared me even more. When he pulled away he held me tightly and buried his face in the crook of my neck. I held on to him not sure what was going on but just wanting to feel him.

"I'm going to miss you so much." He finally said, almost inaudible.

I pulled away and looked at him confused by what he just said. "What do you mean?"

"We're leaving to visit my Aunt Charlotte and Uncle Peter in Chicago for Thanksgiving tomorrow morning." He answered, his voice sounding sad and regretful. I pulled away and went to sit on my bed. I leaned against the headboard and pulled my knees to my chest. I was sad and upset that he was leaving, just as I was finally starting to trust him and want him to help me. "I'm sorry, it was a last minute decision my parent's made." He came and sat on the bed next to me trying to gauge my mood. "If we go to my parents now we can talk to them and they'll stay to help you and to get you out of here. I know they will."

"No Edward, not yet," I said, shaking my head. "I don't want to ruin your families Thanksgiving. I'll be fine and we can figure out what to do when you get back."

"I don't want to leave you here but I don't have a choice, their making me go, even Emmett is going."

"It's okay Edward," I said, trying to be strong and not show how upset I was.

"It's only for a few days. We'll be back on Sunday and if I can, I'll come by and see you after we get home."

I smiled and nodded my head. Not sure if there was anything else to say.

"I can't stay long, I'm supposed to be packing right now, we have to leave early in the morning but I wanted to see you one last time before I left and I want to give you something." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a black cell phone and handed it to me.

"What's this for?" I asked, looking at him confused.

"It's so I can still check on you when I'm gone. I already programmed my number in and Alice and Jasper's just in case."

"What if James finds it or hears it ringing?" I asked.

"It's set on silent so it'll buzz but it won't ring." He explained. "I'll try to only send text messages unless you tell me it's safe to call."

"Edward, I don't know how to send a text message." I said shyly. He grabbed the phone from me with a smile on his face and explained how it works and what buttons to push and never once did he seem irritated about teaching me something as simple as sending a text message. He told me to keep it hidden somewhere in my room when James was around or if I did have it on me to keep it in my sock. It sounded like a strange place to keep a cell phone but it did make sense. It was a place that would never get noticed.

"I'll text you every chance I get," he said, pulling me into his arms. "And please be careful while I'm gone." He stressed. "I don't want anything to happen to you when I'm not here to protect you."

I looked at him and laughed lightly. "What's so funny?" He asked, with a raised eyebrow.

"Edward, I've been dealing with this for quite a while now and I've survived so far. I think I can handle a few days without you." He turned away and crossed his arms over his chest, almost pouting.

"I'm sorry," I said, leaning over on his shoulder. "I didn't mean to make you upset, I just don't want you to have to worry about us while you're gone. We'll be fine and you need to have a good time with your family."

"I don't know how good of a time I'll have being so far away from you." He said, sadly, wrapping his arm around my shoulders.

"Edward, please don't do this, just have fun with your family and we'll see each other when you get back and we'll figure out what to do then." He nodded in understanding and didn't say any more about it.

"So do you ever do anything for Thanksgiving?" He asked.

"Not usually, I try to cook a nice meal for that day but nothing really exciting happens. We don't have family, or friends that come over to eat with us so it's pretty much just a normal everyday meal."

"What about Christmas?" He asked, curiously.

I laughed lightly. "I haven't had a Christmas since I was really little with my mom."

"Well, we'll have to change that. This year you will be having a Christmas." He hugged me tightly and kissed the top of my head.

"We'll see," I said skeptically.

"Do you still not trust me?" He asked, sounding sad.

"No, that's not what I'm saying. Edward, I trust you it's just a scary thing and I don't want to get my hopes up that everything will go the way you or I want it too."

"You need to have hope Bella, otherwise what's the point? I won't let anything happen to you, I promise."

"I know," I replied simply, trying to sound convincing. I knew I was going to be strong and do this but I had my doubts about how well it would go. If I had to sacrifice myself for him and Seth and Leah to be safe, I would. That was what was most important to me and I would do everything in my power to make sure that happened.

We lay there silently for a little while just holding onto each other, Edward finally said he needed to go but I clung to him a few minutes more, not wanting to let him go. He finally pulled himself from me and walked across the hall to say goodbye to Seth, letting him know also that he wouldn't be coming by for a few days. He said goodbye to Leah and she looked almost just as sad as Seth did. After he said one last goodbye to both of them, he walked back to my room. We hugged tightly and kissed once more before he headed down the tree, I could see the fear and sadness all over his face and I did my best to force a smile letting him know everything would be okay.

After he was out of sight, I lay on my bed holding the cell phone tightly, curling up in a ball and crying myself to sleep. I was awoken the next morning by the phone shaking in my hand. I jumped and sat up quickly dropping the phone on the floor. Once I realized what it was I picked it back up to read what it said.

_We just left for the airport, are you okay?_

I began writing back a reply as fast as I could but I was still really slow at it.

_Everything's fine, stop worrying and have fun._

I got out of bed realizing I had forgotten to set my alarm the night before and thankful that Edward had texted me close to the time I normally get up. I quickly took a shower then went down stairs to start breakfast. I was surprised to see that James was already up sitting at the table drinking coffee. I paused briefly when I walked into the kitchen but he shot a questioning look over at me so I quickly went to work, taking things out of the fridge and placing them on the counter so as not to raise any anger in him.

James pushed his chair back, which made a loud screeching sound against the floor and I jumped. I stood out of his way. He placed his empty coffee cup in the sink then grabbed his wallet out of his back pocket and threw a hundred dollar bill on the counter in front of me. I stared at it for a moment confused then slowly raised my head to look his way.

"We'll be having guests for Thanksgiving dinner; I expect it to be good. I also want the house in perfect order and all three of you looking your best." He said simply.

I wondered who it was that would be coming for dinner, we never had guests, this was something new. I wanted to ask him but I knew it would only make him mad so I just nodded my head in understanding and picked up the bill, folded it up and placed it in my pocket.

"I won't be staying for breakfast and I may or may not be home for dinner tonight," he said gruffly. He walked towards the door, grabbing his coat and headed out to his car. I let out a sigh of relief after he left and finished up making breakfast for us.

School that day was like any other day, the only problem was Edward wasn't there. I was surprised how much I missed him. But he sent texts frequently, letting me know when they landed and when they got to his aunt and uncles house. He also sent one telling me how much Emmett was getting on his nerves. I thought that one was kind of funny because even though Emmett was a police officer he was still quite the joker and it clashed with Edward's serious personality. The stories Edward had told me of his childhood had shown me that him and Emmett were complete opposites, but they still got along quite well and would do anything for each other.

After school, I made sure Seth and Leah got home okay, then I walked to the store to get everything I needed for Thanksgiving dinner that James wanted me to prepare. He never told me how many guests we would be having so I tried to plan accordingly but it was difficult. Half way through the store the phone in my pocket started buzzing, I pulled it out and saw a new text from Edward.

_Are you out of school? Would it be okay if I called?_

I quickly found his number on the contact list and called him myself.

"That was quick." He sounded amused when he answered the phone.

"Well you showed me how to work the phone so I knew what I was doing."

He chuckled and I could hear muffled voices in the background talking.

"Are you having fun?" I asked.

"Not really, my cousins are driving me nuts. They want me to give them piggy back rides all over the house and my back is so sore from it," he answered, I laughed lightly.

"Where are you?" He asked. "It sounds loud."

"I'm at the store," I explained. "James informed me this morning that we're having guests for Thanksgiving so I had to get everything I need for dinner."

"I thought you said you didn't do anything for Thanksgiving?"

"We normally don't and I don't know what this is about but he told me to make the dinner good and that we need to look our best."

"Hmm," I could hear the concern in his voice, I knew he was starting to question if this was something bad or something we should be concerned about.

"Edward, I'm sure it's nothing. It may just be a couple guys from the station who have nowhere else to go. Don't worry about it, we'll be fine."

"Alright," he said, exasperated. "But as soon as I get back we're making plans to get you out of there."

"I know," I replied, hesitantly.

"I'm serious Bella; I can't stand back and watch this anymore. The anxiety and fear is killing me."

"I promise Edward as soon as you get back we'll discuss it," I replied. Knowing full well that I would have to summon every ounce of courage I had to actually go through with it. But I was determined this time.

"I'm holding you to that," he said in a joking but serious tone.

"I should probably go so I can finish up this shopping and get home."

"Alright, I'll talk to you later then," he said.

"Bye, Edward."

"Call me if you need me, okay," he begged.

"I will," I promised.

"Bye, Bella."

I hung up with Edward and finished up with the shopping so I could get home. James didn't get home until really late that night and the next morning he was gone before we were up.

On Thursday, Edward texted really early that morning to wish me a happy Thanksgiving but I think more than anything he was checking in to make sure we were okay. James still hadn't told me anything about who was coming to dinner but he seemed tense and nervous which made me nervous. I spent the entire day cooking everything I could find that was traditional for a Thanksgiving dinner. There was probably enough to feed twenty people but for all I knew, I could be feeding that many people. I made sure Leah and Seth were cleaned and dressed in their best clothes and did last minute things to be sure the house was in perfect order. James left around two saying he had to go pick up our guests and he would be back in a couple hours. I assumed he would want dinner to be done at that time so I rushed those last two hours to make sure everything was done and still have time to clean myself up.

After I was done with everything, I rushed up stairs to change and call Edward quickly.

"Bella," he answered.

"Hi," I said timidly.

"Are you okay? You sound nervous." He sounded scared and tense.

"I'm fine Edward," I said laughing. "James left a little bit ago to go get whoever is coming for dinner and I wanted to call and see how you were doing." He chuckled lightly.

"We actually just finished eating and now we're getting ready to watch a movie. We're all going to bed early tonight to get up and shop in the morning."

"You're going shopping in the morning?" I asked skeptically.

"Not me, everyone else," he said laughing. "I volunteered to stay and watch the kids."

"How old are your cousins?"

"Carmen is nine, Sasha is six, and Benjamin is four. They're good kids, just rambunctious."

"You are so good with kids." I said, sincerely. "I see how you are with Seth and even Leah, and it amazes me how kids respond to you. You're going to make a great father someday."

"Are you saying you want to have kids with me someday?" He asked jokingly. I blushed instantly, my eyes wide with shock. I was so glad he wasn't here to see it.

"No, I just... I mean... I didn't... you're good with kids, that's all," I stammered. He laughed loudly into the phone.

"Let me guess, Bella Swan is as red as a tomato right now," he playfully added. I think I got even redder at his words and couldn't answer. "I love that I can make you blush even over the phone. I just wish I was there to see it. I miss that. And don't worry, I was just joking around, blame it on the turkey." I opened the window for a second to get some air and saw James coming up the road.

"I have to go Edward, James just got back." I said quickly.

"Alright, call me tomorrow if you can," he pleaded.

"I'll try, goodnight."

"Goodnight Bella," he said, sweetly.

I hung up and quickly ran down stairs to prepare Seth and Leah. I knew James was trying to make a good impression on whoever our guests were so I had to continue to play along.

He walked into the house and looked over at us standing in the living room with a look that clearly said don't embarrass me. We all understood and had no intention of disappointing him. He walked through the door and following behind him was a tall beautiful woman with long mahogany colored hair and perfect features. She looked like a model, I recognized her from somewhere, but couldn't place her. Behind her were two young children that looked to be about Leah's age, they had light brown hair, and blue eyes, and they looked similar to the woman but different in some ways. I assumed that they must be her children. James took their coats and placed them in the closet. The woman that looked so familiar glanced over at us and smiled then followed behind James walking towards us.

"Heidi, these are my kids," James began, smiling from ear to ear. "This is Bella, who made the wonderful smelling meal we're about to eat, and this is Leah who is the same age as Jane and Alec, and this little guy is my youngest, Seth." He introduced us to her in an almost proud, caring way which was shocking to all of us. All I could do was look at him dumfounded trying to figure out what exactly was going on.

"It's so nice to finally meet all of you, James had told me so much about you," The woman my father introduced as Heidi, greeted. "These are my children, Jane and Alec," she gestured to the two kids standing behind her. "They are both a little shy but they will warm up." None of us could say a word and there was an awkward silence that fell onto the room. James glanced over at me glaring and clearing his throat. I shook myself out of my daze to acknowledge them.

"It's nice to meet you Heidi," I said, reaching my hand.

It's nice to meet you too," she said taking my hand to shake, giving me a slight smile. "You look very familiar Bella, have we met somewhere before?" She asked, narrowing her eyes at me.

"I don't think so ma'am," I replied, but I was still wondering if somehow we had met somewhere, she looked so familiar and I recognized her voice. She hummed and turned her head back at James giving him a sheepish smile. "Dinner is ready if we want to go to the dining room table." I suggested.

"That sounds like a good idea," James added. We walked to the dining room and sat down at the table, all of us feeling a little uneasy. James was beaming with happiness as was Heidi; they continued to chat during dinner happily while the rest of us ate in silence.

"Bella, I must say this is the best macaroni and cheese I have ever tasted," Heidi complimented. "Is it a family recipe passed down over the years?"

"No, it's just something I came up with on my own." I replied.

"Well, it's delicious," she added.

"Thank you."

"Bella has hopes of going to culinary school once she graduates," James declared.

"That's wonderful Bella, I'm a waitress at a small Italian restaurant in Port Angeles," she added. Maybe I could get you an internship." My heart sunk, that's where I knew her from, where I had seen her. She worked at the restaurant Edward and I had gone that night, she was our waitress. I felt sick to my stomach all of a sudden. She already recognized me; would she remember and tell James? I began to feel uneasy and fidgeted a lot doing my best not to make eye contact with her.

James and Heidi continued their chit chat, talking about their work, and their hopes for the future. I finally figured out what was going on and I wasn't happy about it. James was wining and dining this woman as a potential replacement for my mother. I hated him for doing this, why couldn't she see who he really was? I felt like I needed to warn her and tell her to run. But what good would that do? I was pretty sure Leah saw what was going on as well, she kept kicking towards me and giving me worried glances.

"Once Bella leaves for College, I'm not sure how we will all survive," James cut into my thoughts. "I'm afraid we'll all starve without her here."

"Well, you know James, I'm a pretty good cook myself," Heidi proclaimed in a flirty tone.

"I do know that," he said in the same flirty tone as she was using. "Maybe you'll have to move closer to Forks to take care of us."

"Maybe I will," she said as they both looked lovingly into each other's eyes with goofy smiles on their faces. I dropped my fork from the terror I felt for this woman and her children. It made a loud clanking sound when it hit my plate. Everyone looked over at me with questioning looks. I blushed instantly and apologized sheepishly.

"Now I know where I recognize you from," Heidi said sounding excited. My eyes widened and my entire body went ice cold, shaking slightly. "You came into the restaurant I work at with a dashing young man a few weeks ago. I thought you two looked so cute together. I could tell it was a first date and I was doing my best to give you privacy. The young man left a hefty tip also which I greatly appreciated." She went on and on telling this story. I sneaked a peak towards James who was glaring at me intently; his teeth were clenched, nostrils flaring. I knew at any minute he was going to snap. Part of me hoped he would, and then Heidi would see who he really was and not subject herself or her children to this life.

"Are you sure it was her?" James asked sounding calmer then he looked.

"I'm sure of it," she replied, looking at me with questioning eyes.

"There must be some sort of mistake, it couldn't have been me." I tried to lie and cover it up but she knew, she had no way of knowing that it wasn't something James was supposed to know. She saw James differently than we did.

"It had to have been you, I saw you blush just like that at least a half a dozen times," she added. "I love when young couples come into the restaurant. They always seem so cute and nervous. That's where your father and I met actually. He came into the restaurant and sat at the bar every night for weeks, we would talk casually as I helped other customers and eventually we got closer and started seeing each other." She looked over at him and smiled sweetly, reaching over placing her hand on his. I was so nervous and scared about what James was going to do but at the same time I was so angry at him for doing this again. I couldn't sit back and watch him ruin another family's life. I told myself I was going to be strong, that I was going to fight back and here I was still being a coward. Why did I ever think I could possibly be strong enough to get away? I was fooling myself if I thought there was a chance.

James still seemed mad but for the sake of appearances he calmed down. I expected that I would be punished once they left. I didn't know what the punishment would entail, but it scared me.

I spent the rest of the night pushing food around on my plate, too nervous and scared to even think about eating. Heidi kept complimenting me on the great food and continued to flirt and chat with James. They seemed very comfortable with each other. This explained where he went every night but of course he would never tell us any of this.

After everyone was done eating, Leah and I began clearing the table and James walked Heidi and the kids back out to her car. I watched as they kissed and hugged before she got in her car to leave.

"Bella, what are you going to do?" Leah asked from behind me sounding terrified.

"What can I do?" I replied, completely helpless. "It'll be okay, but here." I reached down in my sock and took the cell phone out and handed it to her. Her eyes were wide as she looked at it. "If things go badly I want you to call Edward and ask him what to do."

"How about you hand over the phone to me instead," James said, coming into the kitchen. We gasped and turned towards him with wide eyes and gaping mouths. He came up to Leah and ripped the phone from her hands. He began pushing buttons on the phone and reading things silently but still moving his lips and smirking occasionally. I was sure he was reading all of mine and Edward's texts. Leah and I stood there frozen in our spots, too scared to do anything.

"Leah, go upstairs, now." James demanded, we both flinched but Leah listened and ran upstairs. I knew I was going to be beat really bad, I knew it was coming. All I could do was wait.

"This is the boy that came by that night I had to come home right?" He asked with gritted teeth, he knew exactly who it was he was trying to get me to confess. "The boy you insisted there was nothing going on with, yet tonight I find out you went with him all the way to Port Angeles when you both had a very convincing lie that you were working on a school assignment." I didn't respond or look at him, to afraid to even breathe. I kept my head down and stared at the floor. I felt his fist hit my face before it registered what had happened. I fell to the floor; my hands instinctively went to my burning cheek.

"How much does he know?" He yelled, standing over me. "What did you tell him?"

"He doesn't know anything," I lied. My voice was shaky.

He chuckled and shook his head in amusement. "Well according to those fucking text messages all over that phone, I tend not to believe that. So I suggest you stop fucking lying and you start telling me the truth. Unless you want something really bad to happen to precious Edward," he said sarcastically.

I didn't know what to say, I knew regardless of what I told him he would be going after Edward. I felt the tears build up in my eyes. I knew it would all come crashing down on me eventually. I wasn't worthy of having any kind of happiness or love from anyone. I didn't know why I even tried.

"Thanks for ruining my fucking night," he exclaimed. "This was supposed to be a nice family Thanksgiving dinner and you couldn't even get that right. You are such an incompetent fucking bitch. The expression on your face during dinner already has Heidi questioning things. Now I'm going to have to come up with some sort explanation for your obscene behavior."

James began kicking me in the ribs, demanding I tell him what Edward knew, but I wouldn't. Eventually he stopped for a few minutes, realizing I wasn't going to give in. I tried to uncurl my broken body to stand up, but he came back and grabbed a handful of my hair, pulling me across the floor. I screamed from the pain of it and he shouted back telling me to shut up. I tried my best to be quiet but I was still whimpering and sobbing from the pain radiating through my body.

He dragged me to the other side of the kitchen and opened the door that led to the basement.

"Please James," I whimpered. "Not the basement, please, I'm sorry. He won't do anything; I can convince him that everything is okay, please."

He leaned down so I could look at him; he was glaring and had a menacing smile on his face. "Unfortunately you just decided that kid's and your fate; don't ever expect to see him again." More tears started streaming down my face. This was it, my worst fear come true. I didn't know if I would see Seth and Leah or Edward ever again. I had hurt everyone I cared about and now I was paying the price just like my mom had.


	13. Chapter 12

I know, what a great day to add a chapter right? Happy Thanksgiving to all American readers. So I think this chapter is a little bit of a tear jerker. I even cry when I re-read it, so you might want to have some tissues handy. Thanks so much for all the reviews, I love reading what everyone thinks. And thanks to bzeemomof4 and redlulu for helping me make the story sound and look better.

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or it's characters.

* * *

**Bring Me To Life: Evanescence**

How can you see into my eyes like open doors,  
Leading you down into my core, where I've become so numb.  
Without a soul, my spirit\'s sleeping somewhere cold,  
Until you find it there and lead it back home.

(Wake me up)  
Wake me up inside,  
(I can't wake up)  
Wake me up inside,  
(Save me)  
Call my name and save me from the dark.  
(Wake me up)  
Bid my blood to run,  
(I can't wake up)  
Before I come undone.  
(Save me)  
Save me from the nothing I've become.

Now that I know what I\'m without,  
You can't just leave me.  
Breathe into me and make me real.  
Bring me to life.

(Wake me up)  
Wake me up inside,  
(I can't wake up)  
Wake me up inside,  
(Save me)  
Call my name and save me from the dark.  
(Wake me up)  
Bid my blood to run,  
(I can't wake up)  
Before I come undone.  
(Save me)  
Save me from the nothing I've become.  
Bring me to life.  
(I've been living a lie there's nothing inside.)  
Bring me to life

Frozen inside without your touch,  
Without your love, darling,  
Only you are the life among the dead.

All this time, I can't believe I couldn't see,  
Kept in the dark, but you were there in front of me.  
I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems.  
Got to open my eyes to everything.  
Without a thought, without a voice, without a soul,  
Don't let me die here.  
There must be something more,  
Bring me to life.

(Wake me up)  
Wake me up inside,  
(I can't wake up)  
Wake me up inside,  
(Save me)  
Call my name and save me from the dark.  
(Wake me up)  
Bid my blood to run,  
(I can't wake up)  
Before I come undone.  
(Save me)  
Save me from the nothing I've become.

Bring me to life.  
(I've been living a lie there's nothing inside.)

Bring me to life.

**EPOV**

The minute my parents said we are going to Aunt Charlotte and Uncle Peter's for Thanksgiving, I knew it would be bad. I can't leave Bella that long. What if something happens and I'm not here to help her? I know I'm not really doing anything to help her anyway but there is always that chance in the back of my mind that I would be needed to protect her or save her from him someday. I was ready for it too. In the beginning, I was a little scared of him and worried about what he might do to me, but now none of that mattered; I will do anything I have to for Bella, there is no doubt in my mind anymore. And if that is love then I guess I love her.

I attempted to get out of going, begging my parents to let me stay home but they insisted that I go, stating that it would be good for me to get away for a little while and spend time with family. But they don't understand what this is going to do to me. I want her to come with me and talk to my parents and tell them everything. I know if she will talk to my parents we will stay, but I know Bella and she won't do that because she is a selfless person and would rather risk the chance of being beat for a few more days then ruin my families Thanksgiving. I also know that getting her to talk to someone is almost impossible, I had a pretty good inclination that when I get back she will want to make arrangements to run. I expect it and planned for it, but I can't help the pain I feel when I think about her being gone forever.

The only way for me to keep in contact with her while I was gone and to make sure she was safe was to get her a phone. I rushed to Port Angeles, after my parents first told me we were leaving, to pick up a simple cell phone for her. When I gave it to her, she looked at it like it was a bomb about ready to go off in her hands. It never dawned on me that she wouldn't know how to use one. I spent a good hour showing her how to use it and what to do. I stayed longer than I had planned on staying, but I couldn't pull myself away and in return, I spent most of the night packing and not sleeping at all. Not that I was able to sleep anyway.

We left early the next morning, the anxiety rushing through me was torture. I texted her to make sure she was okay. I know it is early but she will be up by now. Then I read her reply saying she was fine, I relaxed a little but I am still on edge. I'm sure my family notices but the only one that said something was Emmett. He teased me the entire plane ride about my strange behavior and all while making jokes about Bella. Even though he knows about Bella, I never actually admitted anything to him, so he continually tries and pushes me so I will spill. The only problem is the more he mentions Bella the more anxiety I get.

When we arrived at Peter and Charlotte's home in Chicago, all I can think about is sleeping, but my cousins had a different idea. Benjamin jumped on me, and Sasha got the idea to do the same. Carmen is starting to get to the age that she doesn't want to rough house and play, but by the end of the night she is wrestling with Emmett and I just as much as the other two.

Charlotte is Carlisle's younger sister and after their parents died a few years ago; all they were left with was each other, even though we only see them maybe twice a year. But apparently there is a reason for this visit; after the children have gone to bed for the night, Charlotte informs all of us she has been diagnosed with breast cancer. My parents are devastated and I have to admit it is kind of scary. She told us that her doctor's are hopeful that all will be okay since they caught it early enough but she and Peter are scared. She wants Carlisle's advice on treatments and how best to prepare the kids if something were to happen to her. That really got to me; I don't like thinking that my cousins might not have a mother. I can't imagine not having my mom, even though she's overbearing and controlling; I'd rather have that then nothing at all. I began to think even more about Bella's situation and how she was without a mother. James had taken that away from her and now she is the mother figure to Seth and Leah.

I text Bella as often as I can, waiting for any reply from her to kill the anxiety I feel while being away from her. When I actually speak with her I feel so much better. Then she tells me that James wants her to cook a huge Thanksgiving dinner for guests and my anxiety spikes again and I get a strange feeling in the pit of my stomach. I want to believe her when she says it is fine and there is nothing to worry about but something about it bothers me. Thanksgiving day my phone rings and it is Bella and immediately I start panicking, wondering what is wrong. I am beginning to think that this girl is going to give me a heart attack with all the emotions that are spiraling around inside of me. It is strange for sure; there is never much that bothers me. I'm always a laid back type of guy that just goes along with things. But now I am feeling everything all at once, I notice everything; I am caring about things that I never even thought about before. I am a mess.

It's Friday morning and I am awaken bright and early by a very hungry Benjamin who wanted breakfast immediately. I reluctantly pulled myself out of bed and went down stairs to get him some cereal then went back up to wake Emmett, I am not planning to watch the kids by myself, while he sleeps in. Emmett and I all of a sudden hear a loud rumbling of sorts coming down the hall, we peaked out to find that both Carmen and Sasha were rushing down the stairs, pushing and shoving each other all the way. Emmett and I looked at each other and laughed remembering we used to do the same thing when we were that age. I followed them down and got them both some cereal. Shortly after, Emmett finally came downstairs pouring a bowl of cereal for himself also. While the girls and Emmett sat at the table eating breakfast, Benjamin and I sat on the couch watching cartoons, while we waited for everyone else to get back from shopping. My parents and aunt and uncle left very early this morning to catch all the great deals. My mom and Aunt Charlotte loved to shop and did it every time they got together. My father and Uncle Peter were mainly there to chauffer, hand over the credit cards, and to carry all their purchases. That is why Emmett and I volunteered to stay behind to watch our cousins, because if we hadn't we would have been dragged into every store and been given arm loads of stuff to carry and mom probably would have made us try on at least a dozen different sweaters to find just the right one. She had this thing about getting us sweaters every year and there isn't a sweatshirt or a hoodie or anything that we would actually wear. It was always something festive and colorful and when we were younger they always had some type of Christmas themed picture. She would make us wear them on Christmas day and we hated it but it made her happy so we did it every year and still continue to do it now.

Emmett and I decide to play some board games with the kids, which then became watching Disney movies. I texted Bella during one of the movies with no response, I decide that maybe she was busy cleaning or studying, so I decided to wait and see if she would respond later. Several hours passed and I realize I had not heard from Bella, so I text her again, and again throughout the day and never receive a response back. I suddenly start to get really scared. I am at the point that I am thinking of calling Alice to have her check on Bella. But thankfully, around three, right when I was about to call Alice, I finally got a text from her letting me know that she is busy. I immediately started relaxing realizing that my original assumption was right and that everything is fine and I have nothing to be worried about.

"I take it Bella finally text you back," Emmett commented.

"Why do you think it's Bella?" I ask, irritated by his pestering.

He looked at me with a raised eyebrow and smirk on his face. "Because you've carried that phone around with you all week and every time you get a text you relax. But you've been texting someone all day and with every text you send you get more tense and fidgety. I assume you finally got a reply since you seem to have calmed down a little." I stared at him with disbelief. I am surprised he actually noticed all that. He obviously must have understood the look on my face because he rolled his eyes and looked at me like he was hurt. "It's my job to notice these things Edward; I'm a cop, that's what we do. We notice things and pick up on things to get to the truth."

"Well, you don't do a very good job of it," I mumbled, almost inaudible.

"Edward, I don't understand why you are keeping this a secret. Have you even told mom and dad that you're dating her?"

"Who said I'm dating her?"

"Edward, you're my little brother, I know you better than anyone. This girl has you completely changed. I'm not saying it's all a bad thing but you can't be so wrapped up in this girl that it controls your life. And you can't keep going behind James' back to see her. You both need to grow up and tell him. He's not as bad as you think, I know he comes off as a tough cop and strict, but that's just his outer appearance. He's really a nice person who would probably be happy to have you dating his daughter over some of those jerks that go to Forks high school."

"And what if I told you that the minute I told James I want to take his daughter out, something really bad would happen?" I asked seriously.

"Like what?" He laughed.

"Like someone might get seriously hurt."

"Did Bella tell you this? Did she make you think that he would hurt you if you told him? Come on Edward, this is stupid, you are acting like a thirteen year old who's afraid to tell your parents about your first girlfriend. You're eighteen now and should know how to treat a girl properly. Mom and Dad taught you better than this."

"Fuck you, you have no idea what's going on. It's a lot more complicated and has nothing to do with not wanting to tell mom and dad, or James," I said, in haste. "It has to do with keeping her safe. You shouldn't even know that we've been seeing each other. And you're one to talk, I remember a few weeks ago you telling me you had a date and you haven't said anything to mom or dad about it."

"Just because I took someone on a date does not mean that it's anything serious. I think I've been out with at least three women since I mentioned I had a date that night. And none of them was I ever serious about like you seem to be with Bella. And what are you talking about keeping her safe?" He asked, giving me a questioning look.

"Nothing can we just drop this? If you must know yes the text was from Bella and yes she's who I've been texting all weekend and why I've been on edge but as far as why that is, I can't tell you yet because you are too close to the problem."

He began laughing and got up off the couch where we were sitting to head to the kitchen. "God teenagers these days are so dramatic. I hope I never acted like that when I was your age." I got up quickly and headed up stairs wanting to get away from him. I text Bella again asking if it was a good time to call, I really need to hear her voice but she quickly text back telling me it was not a good time. I end up lying down and fell asleep instead. I decided for the rest of the weekend I will avoid Emmett as much as possible. I came very close to telling him everything, part of me really wanted to but after seeing his reaction, I understood why Bella was afraid people won't believe her. Even my own brother laughed at the little bit of information I had given him.

When we were ready to fly home on Sunday our flight got delayed due to the weather, so we had to wait in the airport for five hours before we could head home. I spent that time texting Bella asking how her week went and asking who the guests were for Thanksgiving wanting to know everything she did while I was gone but her responses were little more than a simple "hello" or "not a good time", she wouldn't answer any of my questions and refused to let me call her or come see her once I got home. I was starting to get worried and wondered if something was wrong. My gut told me something was, but there could be a very logical explanation for her distance. James could be suspicious and she was trying to protect both of us from him finding out or maybe she was just exhausted from the weekend like I was. I figured as long as she was still texting me then she was fine and I would see her on Monday. We got home very late Sunday night so I went straight to bed knowing I had to get up in just a few hours. And knowing I will see Bella tomorrow at school.

In the morning, as I walked downstairs I was still exhausted and wanted nothing more than to go back to bed. I found my father sitting at the table reading the paper, so I sat down next to him and poured myself a bowl of cereal.

"You look tired Edward, why don't you take the day off? I'll call the school and get you out." My dad offered."

"No that's okay; I really want to go today. I've missed too much as it is." I had been missing a lot of school, but the most important thing I was missing was Bella.

"Alright, if you want to go I won't stop you but I would prefer you stay home and get some sleep."

"I'm fine dad," I replied. I went back to eating my breakfast trying to waste time before I could go to school. I considered going over to Bella's house to pick her up but with James watching me lately and with trying to keep up appearances at school it would be a mistake.

"Where's mom?" I asked, realizing for the first time that she isn't around.

"She went to school early to try and figure out what kind of mess the substitute left her." We both chuckled, knowing that mom didn't like having subs take over her class because they always messed something up or didn't do it right. Every time she had to use a sub she would come home complaining about something they did. I'm sure today would be no different. I got up to put my bowl in the sink when the phone rang. My dad answered it while I ran upstairs to grab my backpack and books. When I came back down stairs, I found my dad standing in the kitchen looking sad and worried about something.

"Dad, what's wrong?" I asked. I wondered if it had something to do with Aunt Charlotte. I knew he was worried and this week she was supposed to start treatment so I had a feeling that was what the phone call was about. I hoped nothing serious had happened.

"That was the chief of Police," he said in a sullen voice. My stomach tightened with fear and my heart started pounding, I was sure my father could probably hear it. "He said that he had to send his oldest daughter Bella, to a feeding clinic in Seattle. He's come to me a few times wondering if she may have an eating disorder from the signs he was seeing. I guess during Thanksgiving dinner she didn't eat anything and had a major outburst, he finally confronted her and told her he was sending her away to get help." I couldn't even breathe; I didn't want to think about what he did to her. I knew that was a lie, I knew it wasn't an eating disorder. This was a cover-up, what is he trying to cover up though? She has been texting me all weekend, she would have said something if he was hurting her or sending her somewhere. Then it hit me, he very well could have found the phone and has been sending those texts himself. That's why he insisted I didn't call or come over. I got light headed and everything went blurry, I felt like puking or passing out. "Edward, are you okay?"

I barely heard him through my erratic breathes, I don't know what to do, I don't know where she is or how to find out. "Dad, he hurt her," I spurted out.

"Who hurt who?" He asked, confused.

"I have to save her," I declared.

"Edward, what are you talking about?" He still looked confused about what I was trying to say. My heart is beating so fast I felt like it is going to rip through my chest, I can't even breathe.

"Dad, I need you to come with me." I grabbed his arm and pulled him out to my car getting in as quickly as I possibly could. I pulled out of the driveway and sped down the road. If anyone would know where he sent Bella, it would be Seth and Leah and I need to get to them to make sure they are okay. This was my worst fear, that something would happen to her and I wouldn't be able to do anything about it. I don't even know where she is or if she is even still alive. All I knew is I had to find her. I could hear my dad yelling at me to slow down and to answer his numerous questions about what is going on but none of it registered enough for me to be able to answer coherently. I just continued to drive as fast as I could to the school where I hope Seth and Leah would be. Unless, he pulled them out too and sent them away. There is only one way to find out. When my father started yelling to pull over because there is a cop car behind me it finally registered that I am getting pulled over.

My father started yelling that it serves me right for getting pulled over after driving like I was. He doesn't understand that this has nothing to do with my speed; this is James pulling me over to get rid of me somehow. I have come to the conclusion that he has found out and now he needs to get rid of any evidence, being me since I know too much.

"Well, well, well, Edward Cullen. We meet again under similar circumstances," James intimidated. I glared at him trying to hold my anger inside.

"I'm so sorry James," my father stressed from the passenger seat. "Edward seems to be in a huge hurry this morning for some reason." My father glared over at me.

"Dr. Cullen, I didn't see you there," James admitted, almost sounding nervous. I smirked slightly knowing that he can't do anything to me with my father right here.

"I completely understand if you give my son a ticket for his recklessness, I don't know what has gotten into him this morning." My father said.

"Where you headed in such a hurry son?" James asked.

"I think you know quite well where I'm headed," I said through gritted teeth.

He stifled a laugh while he wrote out the ticket. "Yes well, I'm afraid that where you're headed may not do any good if you end up getting in an accident on the way there. As a matter of fact, it may not do any good regardless," he hinted. My father may not have gotten it but I understood.

"I hope your daughter is doing better," my father remarked. "Please keep me updated on her treatment and let me know if there is anything I can do to help."

"I'll do that Dr. Cullen, I appreciate all the support," James said, ripping the ticket from the ticket book.

"You know, it's funny, I've seen Bella eat just fine quite often, and she has never given me any inclination that there was anything wrong with her, at least nothing that she was doing to herself," I added. I glared at him and he glared back. I could see his jaw flexing and his fists balling up. I wanted to get out of the car and kill him and I very well may have if my father wasn't sitting right next to me.

"Well, eating disorders can be complicated, Edward," James said, trying to remain calm.

"Really, is that still the story you're going to stick to? Because I can get at least a dozen people to state that she eats just fine," I lied. "Why don't you tell me where she really is? What you did to her?" I don't know why I am testing him like this but part of me knew he wouldn't do anything with my father here and I am pissed. I want to know where she is. I want him to screw up and do something stupid so my father would believe me.

"You better watch it kid, unless you want to get arrested," James said through gritted teeth.

"Is that what you plan to do, arrest me so I won't tell everyone who you really are?"

"Edward, what are you doing?" I heard my father warn.

James and I glared at each other for a few seconds more, testing each other's limits before he sighed in defeat. "Have a nice day Dr. Cullen, Mr. Cullen," James said quickly before retreating to his car and taking off down the road.

"Edward what the hell was that?" My father asked with anger in his voice. "Are you trying to get yourself thrown in jail?"

"He won't hurt me, I know too much and he knows it. But if you weren't with me right now he probably would have killed me and left me on the side of the road," I disclosed.

"What are you talking about?" He asked, still looking completely confused. I started up my car and took off down the road again.

"Dad he beats her, he's mean to all of them," I admitted.

"Who hurts who, Edward?"

"James," I yelled. "He beats Bella, and he's mean to Seth and Leah too." He started laughing in disbelief just like Emmett had done the other day.

"Edward, you have to be kidding me. You can't go around making those types of accusations against someone like James Hunter. He's a good man and a good father," my father explained.

"Really, how well do you fucking know him dad? Have you ever been in their home? Have you ever seen the bruises on her body? Have you ever seen the fear in all of their eyes? I shouted, still driving erratically.

"Edward, you need to calm down, there has to be some sort of logical explanation for this," he said.

"God, why do you believe him over your own fucking son? Damn it dad, are you even listening to anything I'm saying?" I yelled.

"I'm trying to Edward, but none of this is making any sense." I pulled into the parking lot and slammed on my brakes right in front of the doors, not even worrying about parking in a spot. I jumped out and ran inside rushing to the front desk where an older lady with gray hair pulled up into a bun, sat.

"I need to talk to Seth and Leah Hunter right away," I said quickly. The secretary looked up at me through her eyelashes.

"I'm sorry, who are you?" She asked.

"Edward Cullen, my mother is Esme Cullen who works here," I explained.

"I'm sorry, for my son's rudeness," my father said coming up behind me. "Can you ask Esme Cullen to come down here? We need to have a family discussion. It's kind of an emergency."

"Of course, Dr. Cullen," she said, picking up the phone to call down to her classroom.

"No," I shouted. "I need to see Seth and Leah, now."

'Edward, let's talk to your mother first. You have some explaining to do," he stated.

"I don't have time to explain things," I shrieked, running my fingers through my hair out of frustration. "I'll do that later. Dad, please, I need your help."

"And I'm trying to give it to you but I need to know a few things first."

I groaned loudly through gritted teeth just as my mom came around the corner.

"Edward, what's wrong with you?" She asked looking concerned.

"Mom, please you have to help me, I have to talk to Seth and Leah Hunter right now. Can you get them out of class for me?" I begged. She looked at both of us in confusion then guided us down the hall into a small conference room. I noticed my parents give each other a look of concern once inside the room, but not concern for the right thing. "Will you both stop this; you've wanted to know what was wrong with me for weeks, now when I finally tell you, I get looked at like I'm crazy. James Hunter, Chief of Police of our little town of Forks, is beating his kids and very well could have killed Bella and I need to find her now. Please, I need your help," I shouted, probably loud enough for the secretary to hear down the hall.

"What's going on Carlisle?" My mom asked looking to him to explain. I rolled my eyes and let out a guttural yell. I was so frustrated that we were wasting so much time. I paced as my father explained what James had called about this morning and then how I panicked and rushed out of the house with him in toe, how I behaved towards James, what I told him about Bella being beat. When my father was done he looked over at me still questioning me with his eyes, but my mom looked concerned, I knew I could get her to believe me.

"Mom, please, you told me the story a few weeks ago about your own experience and how much you regret it, please don't let me have that same regret," I pleaded. "I'm not lying about this and if I can talk to Seth and Leah they will tell me where she is, maybe she's still alive and I can save her but I need to know where to look and we're wasting time right now." My mom looked at me with compassion filled eyes and then she sighed heavily and looked away from me. My heart sunk, I was sure she also doesn't believe me, but then she looked to my father and surprised me.

"Carlisle, call Emmett, we may need him," she ordered. I took a sigh of relief knowing that she believed me and is going to help. She walked out into the hall asking the secretary to have Seth and Leah called down to the office then went and asked the principle to join us. My mother gave the principle a short explanation of our suspicions and asked if it would be okay to talk to the children. Seth and Leah walked in to the room with wide eyes and fear in their faces. I was told not to talk to them and to wait until Emmett got here before anyone said anything. I made eye contact with both of them as they walked in, I half expected Seth to come running over to hug my waist like he normally did, but he didn't. He stayed close to Leah almost hiding behind her. Not being able to talk to them was killing me. Shortly after we were all in the small room Emmett showed up walking down the hall way in full uniform looking between all of us wondering what is going on. Once he saw Seth and Leah though, he looked in my direction, clearly giving me a look of 'what have you done now' it didn't go unnoticed and it hurt that even my brother doubted me. He always believed me and stuck up for me.

The principal looked over to Esme asking her to begin since she knew more of what was going on. "Leah, Seth, I need to ask a serious question and I need you to be completely honest with me," she began. "There have been accusations brought to our attention that your father has hurt both of you and your sister. Is that true?" Leah looked from my mom to my brother then to me. She was scared, I could tell. She wasn't going to answer. "Leah, what happened to Bella?" My mother questioned further.

"She went to a hospital in Seattle for eating disorders," she murmured. I rolled my eyes trying to hold in my frustration.

My mother looked back at me and I started to see doubt in her eyes. "If something is happening at home that shouldn't be, you need to let us know," the principal stressed. They said nothing, just looked blankly ahead showing no emotion.

I finally couldn't take it anymore and pushed my way towards them. I noticed my father trying to reach for me but my mom held him back, letting me go.

"Leah, please," I begged, kneeling in front of them to make better eye contact. "You and I both know the eating disorder isn't true, I need you to tell me where she is so I can help her. I promise I won't let him hurt you ever again. Just tell me where she is." Tears began filling her eyes as she tried to divert them to the ground, she looked tired and worn out. Dark circles were under her eyes and she had a long sleeve shirt on that was pulled all the way down to her hands. I noticed how much she looked exactly like Bella always did after she was beat. I reached out and gently grabbed her hand but she instinctively jerked it back and gasped.

"Edward, maybe this isn't such a good idea," my father suggested. "You're obviously scaring the child and I don't think we need to subject them to this interrogation any longer. We can discuss this later and get more answers from James. Maybe he can even give us the name of the hospital she's at so you can go see for your own eyes where she is if it's that important to you."

"Dad, shut up!" I yelled, turning slightly to look at him. "Just believe me for once in your life, believe me. I'm not making this up, I've known for weeks, I've been spending time with all three of them every night, that's where I've been sneaking off to, that's why I've been so angry lately. They aren't scared of me, they're scared of James.

I turned back to Leah after my outburst realizing my yelling at my father was in fact probably scaring them. "Leah, please just tell me where she is. Everyone in this room will keep you safe, he can't hurt you here. At least tell me if she's still alive. "

"I can tell you where she is, Edward," Seth said, timidly. I turned to him quickly as did Leah who shot him a look and she said his name in warning then glanced at my brother. He cowered once again behind her. I turned around to look at my brother standing in the door way with his hands across his chest in his uniform and looking utterly confused and angry by what is going on. It finally dawned on me what they were scared of. They didn't know that Emmett was my brother and would help them. All they saw was a police officer who was connected to their father. They were scared of him.

"You don't need to be afraid of him," I said gesturing to Emmett. "He's my brother, he's on our side. He won't let James get anywhere near you. Leah, please just give me some sort of clue to where she is. I love her and I need to know if she's okay." Leah's eyes shot up at me when I said that I loved her and I heard a gasp fall from my mother's lips behind me, but I didn't have time to worry about that right now.

I looked to Seth, begging him with my eyes to say something but he wouldn't, I saw the tears falling from his face. "Edward, are you going to leave us?" Seth sobbed, through his tears. I reached out to him hugging him tightly.

"I'm not going anywhere, I'll never leave you. I don't care what I have to do, I'll keep you safe."

"Edward," I heard Leah's quiet voice say beside me. I pulled away from Seth slightly to look towards Leah. She had tears streaming down her face and I could barely recognize her. She looks like she is holding her breath trying to not make sounds while she cries. I reached out and pulled her into my arms as well. They both clung to me out of fear and knowing I am their only life line now that Bella is gone. I have a really bad feeling that she is, I began to tear up knowing that they are all I have left of her, that I am too late and let them all down. "Did Bella ever tell you how mom died?" Leah asked, quietly. I pulled away to look at her. Trying to remember the story she told me.

I nodded my head in understanding. "Did she tell you where he kept her?" She looked in my eyes intently trying to relay a message I wasn't getting.

"I remember her telling me that she tried to run with all of you, he found you and brought you back home, then he locked her in the basement and beat her for days before he took her to the cliff." I heard more gasps from almost everyone behind me but I didn't care at the moment, I understood the message. "The basement, is that where she is?" I had chills run all through my body when I figured it out.

Leah nodded her head letting me know I was right. "I don't know if she's still alive, she's been down there for days and he keeps going down there beating and yelling at her. He won't let us see her. Edward please, you have to save her," Leah begged through her sobs.

"I will, I promise," I said through my own tears. I turned around and looked back to my mom who had tears streaming down her face as well. "Will you take them with you and please don't let them out of your sight for one second. I have to get to Bella." She walked forward and pulled Seth from me picking him up into her arms and reached for Leah. "Be careful, Leah has bruises on her arms and maybe other places." Leah looked at me shocked but she knew I was right. My mom gave me the same shocked look but walked them into the hall without saying a word about it. The principal followed them out.

I looked around for my brother but he was nowhere to be found. "Where's Emmett?" I asked my father.

"He's in the hall making some calls; I think he's trying to get a search warrant." I nodded my head and walked towards the door to leave but my father reached out and grabbed my arm.

"Let your brother handle this son," he demanded. I pulled away from him, glaring at him for a second and kept walking.

I walked out into the hall and saw my brother closing up his phone. "I'm getting a search warrant faxed over now, I'll go search the house and find her. I've asked Garrett to meet me there," he explained. "I need you to stay here."

"Like hell I am," I shouted. "I'm going now. I'm not waiting any longer." I ran towards the door hearing my father and brother shouting at me from behind. I jumped in my car and skidded out of the parking lot as fast as I could, heading to her house. I didn't care if James pulled me over again. For all I knew he was at the house now beating her to death and I am not going to let that happen anymore.

I pulled up to the house and ran to the door, knocking loudly and yelling, I knew no one was there to open it and if James is there he probably would have come out by now. I ran around to the back of the house and climbed up the tree to the window. It was locked, which was odd but I knew it had to have been James that did it. I decided to use my elbow to break the glass and reached in to unlock it. I pulled it open just as I heard the cop cars pulling up. I jumped into her room and ran down the stairs trying to figure out how to get to the basement. I ran all through the house opening up every door searching. I finally found a door off the kitchen that was locked just as I heard my brother's voice at the front door yelling at me to open up. I didn't listen.

I kicked the door continuously trying to break it open. My brother had gotten into the house with me now, his gun was pulled and ready to shoot if need be. "Emmett he's not here, please just help me with the door," I asked. He sighed and put his gun away coming over to where I was.

"You need to go outside and wait," he demanded.

"I'm not going anywhere until I find her," I exclaimed. "Either help me get her out, or go find James." He gave me a look of frustration and began helping me with the door, giving up on trying to get me to leave. We were able to kick a hole through the paneling and reach through to unlock it. I ran down the stairs looking around amongst the boxes and bins that were everywhere. I called out to her but didn't get any reply. My eyes scanned across every wall and open space trying to find something amongst the stuff that cluttered the basement. My heart was beating so fast trying to search for her; I kept calling out to her and not getting a response scared me. Maybe he came back after he stopped me this morning and took her somewhere else. Emmett was helping me search and I could hear my father and someone else who I assumed must be Officer Garrett upstairs. I pushed a couple boxes away from the wall and that's when I saw it, there was a small door no bigger than a cupboard. I yelled for Emmett and heard him come running across the room, I pulled the door open full of fear and then I saw her lying on the hard concrete ground tied and gagged. She wasn't moving, I couldn't tell if she was still breathing. I crawled through the small space and pulled her into my arms. She looked up at me with slightly opened eyes and I felt her sigh. There was a feeling of relief that came over me instantly. I reached down and pulled the gag out of her mouth and untied her hands.

She opened her eyes a little more to register who had her. "Edward," she whispered, sounding weak and hoarse. "You have to leave, he'll find you."

"Bella, it's okay now, I'm here to get you out. You're going to be okay," I said quietly making her understand that she doesn't need to be scared anymore. Her eyes closed again and she went limp in my arms. I pulled her out of the small hole with Emmett's help and carried her up the stairs. My father ran over instantly telling me to lay her down on the couch so he could look her over. I could hear the ambulance coming in the distance but it didn't seem close enough.

"Is she going to live?" I asked my dad, full of fear. He didn't say anything or acknowledge me at all. "Dad, please answer me."

"I don't know son," he barked. "I don't have anything with me to do a proper exam. She still has a pulse so that's a good sign. But I can't tell you much more." The paramedics came rushing in and started connecting all kinds of tubes to her and lifted her on to the stretcher taking her away. My father rode in the ambulance with her and I followed behind in my car.

I sat out in the waiting room for what seemed like forever, waiting for any word from my dad. Emmett showed up after about an hour wanting to know what exactly was going on. I told him the entire story, from the beginning which helped pass the time and keep my mind occupied. He was upset that I hadn't told him sooner, which I'm sure everyone was going to be but that didn't matter right now. What mattered is that she is still alive, at least I hoped. He is also mad at himself for not picking up on what was happening sooner.

"Did you find James?" I asked.

"No, we think he was tipped off or got wind of what happened and left. We have calls in to all the neighboring counties to be on the lookout but there's no way to tell if he'll be found."

"It was my fault," I admitted.

"What was your fault?" Emmett asked.

"All of it, everything, I didn't say anything when I should have, I didn't protect her when I promised her I would, I left her by herself, I wasn't there to help her, and I tipped him off." Emmett looked over at me, his eyebrow furrowed.

"What do you mean you tipped him off?" He asked.

"He stopped me this morning on the way to the school, he was planning to do something to me I'm sure of it, but since dad was with me he couldn't. I was mad at him so I started saying stuff and glaring at him, feeling like I could be a smart ass since dad was with me. I did it, I hurt her."

"Edward, you didn't hurt her, you saved her," Emmett countered. It didn't make me feel any better though; all of this was my fault. Emmett sat with me for the remainder of the time until our father came out of the room. I stood up almost running the distance to get to him quicker.

"Is she okay? Can I see her?" I asked.

"She'll be fine," he stated. "She has a couple broken ribs, she needed stitches on her arm from a pretty bad gash, she has quite a few bruises that cover almost her entire body, and she was severely dehydrated, but she's going to okay."

I sighed in relief and leaned back against the wall. "Thanks dad." He nodded his head and reached up to pat me on the shoulder. "Can I see her?"

"Edward, we normally only let family visit in situations this serious," my father explained.

"Dad, she doesn't have any family. The only family she has is Seth and Leah and I'm not letting them in there to see her like that, they've been through enough already. Please dad, I can't let her be in there by herself. I won't wake her I just need to see her."

"Alright," he conceded. "But just for a few minutes."

I walked in the room and sat down next to her, she was sleeping and for the first time since I got her out, I noticed just how bruised and hurt she was. I was afraid to touch her in fear that I would hurt her more. I laid my head down on the bed next to her and lightly brushed my fingers across her fingers, figuring that was the only safe place to touch her. I sat with her for quite a while just feeling happy that she is still alive and here with me now. After a while I heard my mother's voice in the hall then I remembered Seth and Leah. I didn't want them coming in here to see her like this. I don't even know if they are still with my mom. I got up and rushed out the door. Seth and Leah were standing in the hall with my mom and once they saw me they came running. They almost knocked me over from the force of them running into me. I hugged them both and walked them over to the bench against the wall sitting them down.

"They wanted to see you," my mom explained. I turned around to face her; she looked concerned and worried about me. I'd have to explain myself later. But for now I just nodded in understanding.

"Is she okay?" Leah asked, sounding sad.

"She's going to be fine," I said.

"What about dad?" Seth asked.

"The police are looking for him, they'll find him but regardless he's not coming back and he'll never hurt any of you ever again."

"Hey kiddos," Emmett said coming to sit down with us. They stiffened for a moment when they saw him but I assured them that he was here to help. Emmett asked them some questions and wanted to know everything that happened. Eventually my mother pulled me away to talk to me privately.

"I want to know everything that has happened, how long this has been going on, and why it is you chose not to tell us anything until now, but that can wait," she said. "What I do want to know is what you plan to do now?"

"What do you mean?"

"I called the social workers; they're on their way here and will be taking over the case. Most likely Seth and Leah will be moved to a foster home. But I don't know what will happen to Bella, she's over eighteen and usually there isn't much they can do after that. Plus, with James still out there, who knows what he will do."

"No, mom they can't split them up, Bella is all they have. She's been a mother to them for years. You can't let them do this."

"'Edward, there isn't much I can do; they have rules they have to follow. What I want to know is if you are going to be able to handle that? You seem connected to all of them in a way I can't even begin to understand and I'm afraid that you might try to do something stupid when you think you are trying to help them."

"Like what mom, run away with them?" I asked, sarcastically but having every intention of doing it, if it meant keeping them safe and together.

"That has crossed my mind and obviously since you were so quick to answer, it must have crossed your mind as well." She paused before finishing. "I understand that you want to help them, which you have in so many ways, but you need to think about your future and what running away with a girl and two young children will do to you. I would like us to come up with some other solution than something as drastic as you running."

"Can they come live with us, all three of them?" I asked, hoping my mother would say yes.

"I can't do that, I can't put our family at risk and have a girl that you say you love living in the same house," she declared.

"That's what this is about, because I said I loved her, you won't let her live with us?" I questioned in disbelief and anger. "Mom, I promised them I would take care of them and not let anything happen to them. If they're split up, I'll be breaking my promise. Please mom, I'll abide by any rules you set forth and so will they. They're good kids and don't ever do anything wrong, I'll do whatever you want me to do."

"I'll need to talk to your father and the case worker about this first before I say anything," she replied, giving me hope. "I'm sure it would be okay at least for the night to let them stay with us since they've already been through so much today."

"Who is staying with us?" My father asked coming up behind us.

"Edward would like Seth, Leah and Bella to come live with us, I told him we would need to discuss it but that it was probably fine for Seth and Leah to stay at least tonight," my mother explained.

"Bella will be staying here for a few days but if you're okay with Seth and Leah then I'm sure it will be fine," my father agreed.

"I'm staying here with Bella," I announced. "I'm not leaving her."

"Edward, you can't stay at the hospital," my father insisted.

"Dad, I'm not leaving her, you made me leave her once before and this is what happened. I'm not leaving again," I stated. My father sighed heavily before he and my mom walked towards Seth and Leah. They started walking them down the hall to the cafeteria to get them something to eat. I went back into Bella's room and sat with her for the rest of the day and night. Occasionally, my father or a nurse would come in to check on her but she didn't wake up.

My parents decided to let Seth and Leah stay with them as long as they needed and the case worker allowed it but they were given a stack of paperwork to fill out to make it possible for them to stay. They still had not told me whether or not they were planning to let Bella stay also, but I figured they would. I felt bad about snapping at them when everything was happening and I did apologize to them for my behavior. They kept insisting that I go home and get some rest but I wouldn't. I was not going to leave her ever again.

After two long days of waiting for her to wake up, she started to stir early in the morning. "Edward," she called, opening her eyes slowly. I jumped from the chair and reached for her hand.

"I'm here baby, you're okay," I said leaning over to kiss her hand.

"Where are Seth and Leah?" She asked still coming to.

"They're fine, they've been staying with my parents," I replied.

Her eyes shot open and she looked over at me with fright in her eyes. "Where's James?"

"Don't worry about him, he can't hurt you anymore," I replied.

"You didn't... kill him did you?"

"No baby," I chuckled. "I wanted to and I probably should have but no, he took off, the police are looking for him but they haven't found him yet. They don't think he'll be coming back any time soon. Hopefully never but regardless he won't come anywhere near you. I won't let him." She nodded in understanding and let out a breath that she was holding.

"Thank you, for saving me," she said quietly, squeezing my hand.

I leaned over and kissed her forehead. "I should have been there. I should have never left you. It's my fault," I said sadly.

"Edward, don't, it's not your fault. You saved all of us. I'm alive because of you." She reached over and brushed the hair out of my face and smiled. "Don't ever doubt that." I nodded my head and leaned over to kiss her on her lips very gently in fear of hurting her. I heard the door open and my father walked in clearing his throat. I pulled away but still held her hand tightly not wanting to let her go for anything.

"How are you feeling?" My father asked.

"I'm okay, just sore," she replied.

"I think you'll feel that way for a while but we'll get you back to normal soon," he explained. "You're very lucky, if Edward hadn't found you when he did, I don't know how much longer you would have made it."

"I knew I was going to die," she began. "As soon as he pulled me down to the basement, I knew that's what was going to happen. But Edward saved me." She turned to me and smiled lightly. "He's my hero." I smiled back at her but I didn't feel like a hero at all, I felt like I had let her down and broke my promises to her.

"Yes, I guess he is," my father said with a proud smile across his face while he checked over her chart and wrote some notes down. "It's still a couple hours before the breakfast trays come around, why don't you go down to the cafeteria and get you and Bella something to eat Edward?"

"Dad, can't you call a nurse to do that?" I asked holding tighter to Bella's hand. I didn't want to leave her now that she was awake.

"Edward, I need to speak to Bella privately," he clarified. "I'm sure you're both hungry. They have some great breakfast choices, now go get something to eat and by the time you get back, I'll be done." I looked to Bella who gave me a reassuring nod.

I brought her hand to my mouth and kissed the back of it. "I'll be right back."

I walked down the hall to the cafeteria and picked out 2 plain bagels with cream cheese, 2 blueberry muffins, and 2 bottles of orange juice. I didn't know what she would prefer, the bagel or muffin so I got them both and I was starving so whatever she didn't eat I would. After I paid, I walked back to her room; I walked over to her bedside placing the items I had bought on the side table, waiting for my father to finish with his exam. After he was done he helped her sit up in bed slightly. With the broken ribs she couldn't sit up fully but she needed to sit up a little so she could eat and begin to regain her strength.

After my dad left the room, I offered her the bagel and muffin, she took the muffin. I smiled slightly knowing that I would have chosen the muffin also, which I did. We sat there together eating silently. It was hard for her to sit up like she was, but she did it because she's strong. Stronger than anyone I've ever met.

"So, what did my dad want to talk to you about privately?" I asked, nonchalantly.

"He wanted to know if James had ever done anything to me besides beat me," she said quietly.

"Has he?" I asked hesitantly, not knowing if I wanted to know the answer to this.

"No, he never touched me any way other than hitting me." I nodded my head thankful for that. I couldn't imagine what that would be like for her if she had to deal with that pain as well. I wasn't a virgin but I was pretty sure she was and I wanted our relationship to get to that point eventually if she was willing, but if she had been touched by him it would be really hard to get to that, if ever. But I would stay with her regardless. I could be patient and wait as long as I had to for her. I know I was probably being selfish even thinking about sex right now but I'm a guy, it's what we do.

"He also wanted me to try and convince you to go to school." She looked over at me shyly gauging my reaction.

"No, I'm not going back until you do," I insisted.

"Edward, you can't stay here with me all day and night, you have to go to school," she pressed. "I'll probably be sleeping most of the time anyway."

"Bella, he's still out there, I can't leave you again. What if he came to the hospital?"

"I'll be fine, there are lots of nurses and doctors around, they won't let him get to me if he does come," she countered. "Besides, I'm going to need someone to get my homework for me and who better to do that than someone who's in most of my classes already?" We both laughed lightly and I could tell it hurt for her to laugh.

I stood up and laid the bed back so she could get some rest. "Alright, I'll go but I'm going to call your room every break we have and I'll be back right after school is over. We can do our homework together here and I'll turn it in for you every day. And I'm staying here at night."

"Edward," she began to argue but I cut her off.

"I'm staying here," I said ending the conversation. She sighed, conceding to what I wanted. Her eyes started to get heavy and I could see exhaustion was taking over her again.

"Get some rest; I'll be back later today." I stood up and kissed her gently on the forehead and brushed the hair from her face before I left. I didn't want to and I hated leaving her all alone but she was right, no one would let James anywhere near her and I did need to go back to school, I'd been missing so much lately and that wasn't going to look good on college applications. I rushed home to take a shower and change my clothes before I headed to school.

When I arrived, I felt like everyone was staring at me, which wasn't unusual but it felt like they all knew what had happened already. Gossip spreads fast in a small town. I went to my locker trying to ignore everyone around me but I was bombarded by Alice.

"Is she okay? Where is she now?" Alice asked in a rush. "Did you really break in to their house and take her away right in front of James? I heard you got into a huge fight with him? Someone said that you shot him too, is that true?"

"Alice, whatever rumors you've heard they probably aren't true," I replied. "She's at the hospital right now and she's going to be fine. My mom took Seth and Leah to our house and James took off. The police are looking for him but they haven't been able to find him yet.

"So, is it true, did James kill Bella's mom? Did he intend to kill her?" I nodded my head letting her know she was right but I didn't want to go into detail about it. "Can I go see her later today?"

"Yeah, she'd probably like to see you."

"Good, I'll stop by right after school. I'll bring her flowers and maybe a few magazines to look at," she said with excitement.

I smiled and stifled a laugh. "I'll see you there then."

"So, are you two together now?" She asked, fishing for information.

"Yeah, I guess so, I don't know though, I mean we haven't really discussed what we are," I answered.

"Well, you look happy and I think she'll look the same way even after everything she's been through," Alice commented. I hoped she was right, I wanted Bella to be happy and I hoped she would let me be the one to make her happy.

"So," Jasper said with a smirk coming up behind Alice. "Bella Swan, huh, that's the girl you've been keeping a secret?"

"There are reasons why I had to keep it secret, Jaz," I replied.

"I still don't understand why you had to fucking lie to me about it," he complained. "I would have kept your secret."

"I'm sorry but I had no choice."

"Is it true that you tried to run away with her and James caught you and almost killed you but Emmett stepped in and took him down?" He asked.

"No," I said smiling, in disbelief. "Like I told Alice any rumors you hear are most likely not true."

"So, the rumor of you killing him with your bare hands isn't true either?" He joked.

I started laughing at all this craziness. I didn't understand how all these rumors got started. "I have to go to class; I need to talk to the teachers about getting Bella's homework. I'll talk to you both at lunch." I turned to walk down the hall, heading for my class.

"Edward," I heard Alice yell after me. I turned around to face her and was attacked with a hug. I returned the hug hesitantly not knowing what she was doing. "Thank you for saving her," she whispered. She sounded sincere and full of gratitude.

"You're welcome," I replied. I didn't feel like I had done anything special. But I guess to Alice maybe I had. Bella was her friend and I'm sure Alice loved her and wanted her safe just as much as I did.


	14. Chapter 13

So this chapter is pretty long and I questioned posting it at all. I don't know why, I think because it was supposed to be twice as long so it's missing a lot that I think needs to be there but I decided to split this chapter into 2 so it wasn't too long. Let me know what you think. Thanks for all the reviews, I love reading them. And thanks to the FFT14 girls, my twitter friends, and cafemom friends, for being so supportive and helpful.

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or it's characters.

* * *

**Back At One: Brian McKnight**

It's undeniable... that we should be together...  
It's unbelievable how I used to say that I'd fall never  
The basis is need to know, if you don't know just how I feel,  
Then let me show you now that I'm for real...  
If all things in time, time will reveal...  
Yeah...

One... you're like a dream come true...  
Two... just wanna be with you...  
Three... girl it's plain to see... that you're the only one for me...  
Four... repeat steps one through three...  
Five... make you fall in love with me...  
If ever I believe my work is done... then I start Back at One (yeah)

So Incredible... the way things work themselves out...  
And all emotional, once you know what it's all about babe...  
And undesirable... for us to be apart...  
Never would of made it very far...  
Cause you know that you've got the keys to my heart  
Cause...

One... you're like a dream come true  
Two... just wanna be with you  
Three... girl it's plain to see... that your the only one for me  
Four.. .repeat steps one through three  
Five... make you fall in love with me  
If ever I believe my work is done... then I start Back at One......

Say farewell to the dark of night... I see the coming of the sun...  
I feel like a little child... whose life has just begun...  
You came and breathed new life  
Into this lonely heart of mine...  
You threw out the life line... just in the Nick of Time.....

One... you're like a dream come true  
Two... just wanna be with you  
Three... girl it's plain to see... that your the only one for me... girl and...  
Four... repeat steps one through three  
Five... make you fall in love with me  
If ever I believe my work is done... then I start Back at One.

**BPOV**

Shortly after Edward left to go to school, I fell back asleep. I was woken about an hour later by two police officers wanting to question me about what happened. I recognized both of them but only one I had ever met.

"Sorry to wake you Bella but we need to ask you some questions," Garrett said, sitting down in the chair next to the bed. Emmett stood by the door watching me intensely, which made me kind of nervous.

"So we've talked to Seth, Leah, and Edward, getting their story of what happened but we need to find out your story and make sure everything from all sources fits," he began. "Now if you could tell us what exactly happened and why you were put in that hole in the basement and possibly any leads on where James may have went that would be greatly appreciated."

I took as deep a breath as I could without it hurting, to begin. "James had some guests over for Thanksgiving and during dinner the woman recognized me from when I went to Port Angeles with Edward. She started talking about it and I tried to lie, saying it wasn't me but James could tell. As soon as she left he started beating me and demanding I tell him what Edward knew. He found the phone that Edward gave me and read all of the texts that we sent each other. I tried to convince him that he didn't know anything but he didn't believe me and he continued hitting and kicking me. Since I wouldn't tell him anything he dragged me down stairs and forced me into the crawl space. Every few hours he would come down and drag me out and beat me more demanding I tell him what Edward knew and where he was. He kept threatening that he was going to kill Edward. Sometimes he would even say stuff like he was going to make me watch so I would know what my actions caused. One time he dragged Leah down and beat her in front of me to show me what I had done to her. I was so weak even if I wanted to tell him anything to protect her I couldn't. When I heard Edward's voice calling for me, I thought it was a dream. I didn't realize it was really him until he pulled me into his arms."

"Do you have any clue where he may be now?" Garrett asked.

"No," I replied.

"What about these people he had over for dinner?" he questioned, writing something down in his pad of paper. "Had you ever met them before? Do you know where they live?"

"Um, it was a mother, I think her name was Heidi and she had her two kids with her, I don't remember their names."

"Do you know how to find them?" he asked.

"She works at this Italian restaurant Edward took me to in Port Angeles," I answered.

"Do you think James may have gone there?" he wondered.

"Maybe, I don't know. You still haven't found him?" I asked, instantly feeling worried and scared.

"Bella," Emmett finally spoke, I turned my head to look at him. "Don't worry, we'll find him." I nodded my head in understanding and tried to relax. I knew he was out there, but I guess it never hit me that he could be somewhere close waiting to get to me, or even be hurting someone else.

"Alright, why don't you get some rest?" Garrett suggested. "If we have any more questions, we'll come back."

I slept as much as I could between doctors and nurses coming in to check on me, but it was hard to do. Around four that afternoon, just as I was about to fall asleep again, there was a light knock on the door before Alice peaked her head through.

"Can we come in?" She asked.

"Yeah, of course," I answered, trying to sit up as much as I could and shake the sleepiness out of my eyes. She and Jasper walked in and Alice practically skipped her way to the chair next to me carrying a big bouquet of mixed flowers and an arm load of magazines. Most of which were fashion magazines. I wasn't much into fashion, but at least it was something to look at. Jasper stood behind her resting his hands on her shoulders.

"How are you feeling?" She asked, sympathetically.

"I'm okay, just sore and tired. Dr. Cullen said I might be able to leave in a few days if I promise to take it easy for a while."

"I brought you some magazines to look at and if there's anything else you need let me know. I could get your homework for you, and help you get it all caught up. I could bring you food so you don't have to eat hospital food. I could go shopping for you and get you some new clothes for when you go home." Alice kept going on and on about all the things she could do for me but the only thing that I heard was 'home.' I didn't have a home anymore. I didn't think I could ever go back to that house. But where would I go? Seth and Leah had been staying with the Cullen's, but I didn't think I should be imposing on them and who's to say that they would even want me to stay with them after I had put their son in so much danger. I would need to find a place for all of us, which means I would need a job. I'd probably have to drop out of school so I could support us. We should probably move away from Forks so it would be harder for James to find us.

"Bella, are you even listening?" Alice asked, bringing me out of my thoughts.

"Sorry Alice, I guess I'm just really tired." She frowned at me and rolled her eyes a little while Jasper stifled a laugh. "Really though you don't have to do anything for me, especially not buying me clothes."

"Actually that might not be such a bad idea." I heard Edward say from the door. I turned my head quickly as did Alice and Jasper. He walked in with a backpack and a duffle bag which he placed on the floor near the door before he looked up at me with a smile.

"Edward," I said excitedly, smiling back. My heart skipped a beat when he smiled. He walked over to the other side of the bed and kissed me briefly on the forehead and brushed my cheek with his fingers before moving a chair closer to the bed to sit with me.

"Hey," Edward said, addressing Alice and Jasper.

"Hi," Jasper greeted, with a smirk on his face.

"How are you feeling?" He asked me, rubbing my hand gently with his fingers.

"I'm okay," I replied. Our eyes connected and as hard as I may have tried I couldn't pull my eyes away from him. I knew it was silly to feel the way I did for him, especially if I had to leave him when I got out of the hospital but I liked being with him and he made me feel loved. I was always happy when he was with me.

"As I was saying," Alice interrupted. "I think it would be good for you to get some new clothes and start out fresh. I mean, Bella seriously what you wear now is not very fashionable." My face blushed at her description of my wardrobe. I was never allowed much for clothing and anything we did get was usually hand me downs or donated stuff that James would bring home for us to rummage through.

"Considering we can't get any of your old clothes, you might want to take her up on the offer." Edward added.

I turned looking at him curiously. "Why can't we get any of my old clothes?" I asked.

"It's a crime scene, they have the house all blocked off and no one can get in," he explained. "Emmett said that maybe in a few days we might be able to go inside to get anything any of you might need, but for right now we can't."

"What are Seth and Leah doing then?" I asked, concerned that they didn't have anything.

"Don't worry, I just came from the house and they're both fine. My mom has gone a little crazy buying them all kinds of stuff. Clothes, toys, shoes… she even decorated their rooms and got matching bedding to go along with it," he said with a chuckle.

"That's very nice of her," I commented. "I'm sure both of them are enjoying the attention tremendously. "

"Yes, well, I think my mom may be enjoying it more than both of them," he laughed. "She absolutely adores Seth and she never had a daughter so she's enjoying the opportunity to buy girl stuff." I smiled at him and was overjoyed that his parent's were taking such good care of my brother and sister.

"Well regardless Alice," I said turning to face her again. "I can't let you buy me clothes, that's too much and very expensive."

She rolled her eyes at me and huffed. "Bella, my parents have money and leave me with a credit card every time they go on one of their little trips. They'll think I went shopping for myself and not think anything of it. Please, let me do this for you. I really want to." She begged and pleaded with her voice and her eyes. I couldn't refuse her. Once I accepted she became giddy and started squealing. She began making mental notes aloud of everything she would need to buy. Eventually Jasper squeezed her shoulder to bring her back to the present. We all stared at her with amusement. She looked a little embarrassed that she had started rambling in front of everyone.

"Sorry," she muttered. "I guess maybe we should leave and let you two have some time to yourselves." Alice stood and gave me a light hug whispering in my ear that she was glad I was okay and that Edward and I were so happy. I turned to look at him wondering if he happened to hear her but he was looking at Jasper giving him a strange look. I wondered what it was about but I didn't ask.

"I'll come back after I go shopping. If you're up to it you can try some things on and give me and Edward a fashion show," she giggled. I shook my head with wide eyes. Edward laughed at her and at my reaction. I looked over at him almost mad at him for laughing but once Alice and Jasper were gone he pulled my hand to his lips and started kissing my knuckles, instantly making my irritation disappear.

"So how was your day?" I asked.

"Boring, and miserable without you," he replied with a half smile.

"I'm sure it wasn't that bad," I smirked.

"Actually, most of the day I spent dealing with rumors and everyone asking questions about you and what happened."

"What kind of rumors?" I asked. I was disturbed that so much attention was on me.

"Don't worry about it, I'm taking care of it and most of the rumors are about me and my involvement anyway," he explained.

"Do they know that you were the one that saved me?" I asked.

"Yeah for the most part," he answered, nonchalantly.

"Does that bother you?" I asked.

"Why would that bother me?" He asked, with a curious look on his face.

I ducked my head to divert my eyes away from him but he tried to follow them with his own to gauge my expression. "You wanted to keep whatever this is between us secret. I figured you wouldn't want everyone to know."

"Bella, I only kept it secret to keep you safe, not because I didn't want people to know."

"But if you want to end this, you can. You don't have to keep me safe anymore. You don't have to feel guilty or responsible for what happened, it wasn't your fault. Plus once I leave there won't be any point for us to stay in contact with each other," I rambled.

"Bella," he interrupted. "Where do you plan on going?"

"I just figured that after I get out of the hospital I would need to find some way to support Seth and Leah, and find a place for us to live since we don't have a house anymore. It would make sense for us to move away from Forks so James won't find us." I tried to explain what I was planning but I couldn't explain the dread and heartache I felt telling him this. I stole a glance at his face and he looked pained.

"Bella, you have a home. Your home is with me, where you belong. I've already talked to my parent's and they're fine with you coming to live with us, all three of you. You don't have to go anywhere, you can stay here with me and finish school and go to college. You can do anything you want now. You don't have to be responsible for _everything_ anymore."

"Edward I can't live with your parent's. I can't expect them to take care of all of us. I can do this on my own once I feel better."

"Actually you can't," I heard a voice say from the doorway. I turned to the door and saw a small woman with long auburn colored hair, very similar to Edwards, and the same green eyes as Edward. She had to have been Edward's mother and I was sure I had seen her picture when I had been to Edward's house but the picture didn't do her justice for how beautiful she was. She had a glow, a light around her and it reminded me so much of my own mother. She walked towards the other side of the bed and sat down in the chair, smiling at me sweetly. I noticed that Edward had sat back slightly and was barely touching my hand now. Shortly after she sat down I noticed that Dr. Cullen walked in and was standing at the foot of the bed. I glanced from face to face, feeling really nervous about this.

"Bella my name is Esme, I'm Edward's mother," she began. "Edward has asked us if you and your brother and sister can live with us, at least for now anyway. Carlisle and I talked a great deal about it and we have decided that it would be okay if you would like to."

"There will be some rules set that we would expect everyone to follow," Dr. Cullen added.

"I don't know if I can, I already feel like Edward has done more than enough for us, I can't ask more of him or his family," I confessed.

"Bella it's the best shot you have," Carlisle pressed. "The case workers are not going to let you take your brother and sister just like that, especially if you have to drop out of school to support them. If they go to a foster home, you won't be going with them. All three of you are going to need some counseling to deal with everything that has happened to you over the years and I don't feel like you would be able to deal with that plus try to take care of them and yourself without some sort of help. So if you want all of you to stay together, this is your only option."

"Plus we would like it if you would finish school," Esme added.

"Thank you Mr. and Mrs. Cullen. I appreciate everything you are doing for us. But can I ask one thing in return?"

"What might that be?" Esme asked.

"Can I at least do something for you in return for our stay? Maybe cleaning or cooking. Or maybe I can get a part time job and help pay our way?"

"Bella, we don't expect you to pay your way or do anything in return for your stay, the only thing we ask is that you follow the rules," Carlisle replied.

"If you would like to get a part time job, that would be fine but we won't accept any money from you," Esme suggested. We would like you to put that money away for college or for your future." I heard Edward grumble slightly under his breath and I thought I was the only one who heard it but I noticed both Carlisle and Esme look in his direction with irritated looks on their faces.

"So what are the rules Mr. and Mrs. Cullen?" I asked, turning back to Esme.

"First of all," Esme began. "You can call us Esme and Carlisle. And it's mostly just the basic house rules. Clean up after yourselves, if you go somewhere let us know where you're going and when you will be back, no skipping school, keep up your grades and do your homework, curfew is ten for school nights and eleven on weekends, go to counseling sessions regularly, and no sex in the house."

I about choked on my saliva when she said no sex. Did she think Edward and I were having sex? Did Edward want to have sex? I all of a sudden had a whole new fear come over me. I didn't know if I was ready for that or if I would even know one thing about it. I didn't even know what was going on with me and Edward anymore. Things were going to be very different now that everything was out in the open and we were going to be living in the same house. "You don't have to worry about that, Mrs. Cullen, I mean Esme," I replied, shyly.

"I told you mom. You still don't believe me?" Edward asked chuckling lightly.

"I never said I didn't believe you Edward, I just wanted to make all the rules clear for everyone," she replied. I looked between the two of them, squinting and trying to figure out the exchange that was going on between them.

"Well now that we have all that taken care of, I think in a couple days we can start getting you ready to come home," Carlisle cut in. I looked up at him and nodded my head.

"Thank you, all of you, for everything you're doing for us. I can't begin to tell you how appreciative I am for all that you have done," I declared.

"It's our pleasure Bella," Esme insisted. "Did Edward mention to you that Seth and Leah would like to see you?"

"No he didn't, are they here now? I'd love to see them," I said excitedly.

"I didn't know if you would be up to the visit so I thought I would ask first but if you're willing I can bring them by after school tomorrow," she offered.

"That would be great, thank you so much Esme."

"You're welcome Bella, I'll see you tomorrow then," she said, standing from the chair joining Carlisle at the foot of the bed. "Will you be coming home tonight, Edward?"

"No, Bella and I have a lot of homework to catch up on and I'll just crash here when we're done. I'll be at school in the morning though," he reassured. I heard both of his parent's sigh but they nodded their heads and left the room wishing us both a good night.

"Edward, you don't have to stay here all night, I'm sure that chair isn't the most comfortable place to sleep," I tried to convince.

"Bella we went through this, I'm staying here until you get to go home."

"But you don't have to, I'll be fine. I would rather you get some good sleep and be able to stay awake in class," I attempted to argue with him. But instead he got up and walked over to the bags he sat down on the floor and carried them over to the chair.

"I brought you something," he said with a half smile on his face. "Actually I brought you a lot but only one thing that I think will make you really happy." I stared at him curiously wondering what he could have possibly brought me that would make me happy. He reached into his backpack and pulled out my "Pride and Prejudice" book that belonged to my mother. My eyes widened and a smile spread across my face when he handed it to me.

"How did you get this?" I asked in disbelief. I knew I left it in my room before James got back on Thanksgiving, if the house is all blocked off how did he possibly get it?

"I climbed the tree and snuck into your room," he explained.

My smile fell and a look of shock replaced it. "Edward, what were you thinking? You could have got in a lot of trouble." I exclaimed.

"Will you stop fucking worrying so much? It wasn't a big deal. No one saw me or even knew I was there," he snipped.

"Sorry," I whispered, frightened by his tone and use of words. I heard him huff and he leaned his head onto my shoulder.

"I'm sorry for snapping at you, it just wasn't the reaction I was hoping for."

"It's okay, I'm sorry for getting upset, I just don't want you to get in trouble because of me," I explained.

He chuckled and picked up his head lightly to look at me. "We both need to stop saying sorry." I joined him in laughing at how ridiculous we both sounded.

"Thank you, for getting this for me," I finally gave my gratitude for what he did. "It means a lot."

He gave me his half smile and twinkling eyes. "'You're welcome." He leaned over and kissed me gently on the cheek. "Now how about we eat some dinner, before it gets cold?" He pulled out two plastic containers out of his bag and handed me one. I looked at it curiously wondering what it was he was giving me.

He rolled his eyes at my questioning look. "It's lasagna that my mom made yesterday. I brought us the leftovers and had my dad heat it up downstairs before I came up here."

"Oh," I replied. "You know they do feed me here, you didn't have to bring me anything."

"You would rather eat that bland mushy stuff they feed you here than my mom's lasagna?" He asked, with a scowl.

"That's not what I meant, I would gladly eat this over the hospital food, it looks delicious, but you didn't have to," I said.

"Bella," he started, placing his food down on the table and looking at me intently. "What is it that you think is going on between us?"

"I don't understand what you're asking," I said truthfully.

"Do you think I'm here with you out of guilt or out of some urge to be the hero? Those are things you accused me of once and I'm not sure if you've ever believed that it wasn't true. I really like you Bella, I know I said that I loved you once and I did mean it because I do think that I'm in love with you but I don't want us to move to fast so I want to take things slow and see where they go but I guess I can't have a one sided relationship if you aren't willing to try," he expressed.

I didn't know how to reply to what he was suggesting. Was he trying to tell me that I wasn't doing this right? Maybe I had done something wrong and now he was mad at me.

"Bella, when someone wants to be your boyfriend he usually does nice things for you and does whatever he can to be with you no matter what the consequences may be," he said.

My heart skipped a beat when he said boyfriend. "But what can I do for you Edward?" I countered. "I like you a lot and I like sending time with you and being close to you but I have no idea what I'm doing or what you could possibly see in someone like me. I'm nothing special. I'm not even that pretty. What could I ever give you?"

He smirked and stifled a laugh before leaning in and placing a kiss on my lips. "You don't have to do anything, just be with me and let me take care of you."

"That doesn't quite seem fair," I countered.

"But that's all I want," he argued, kissing the back of my hand.

I began to melt at his touch. "I think I can handle that," I said, smiling at him.

"Good," he said chuckling. "Now eat before I have to go track down my dad to have him heat it up again." I smiled at him once more before pulling the lid off of the container and eating the lasagna. I had to admit it was really good and a whole lot better than the hospital food.

After I was done eating Edward could tell I was exhausted so he told me to try and get some sleep while he worked on his homework. He said he would keep the nurses away while I slept which I was grateful for.

_I was back in the crawl space in the basement and I could hear James yelling at Leah upstairs for something ridiculous. Threatening that she would end up where I was next if she didn't do as she was told. I heard Leah scream and then heard a loud thud. I could lightly hear the whimpers from Seth. Then I heard the door swing open and feet come running down the stairs. He opened the small door and pulled me out by my hair, dragging me back up the stairs. He pulled me out to the garage and made me get into the car. We drove down the road for a long time before we came to a stop. He came around to get me out and pulled me through the woods a ways before he stopped and told me to walk five steps forward by myself. I did as he said and was abruptly stopped by something on the ground. I looked down to see what it was I ran into and came face to face with the lifeless body of Edward. I screamed and I could hear James laughing in the background._

I sat up straight in the bed even though it was painful and started screaming and crying.

"Bella, what's wrong?" I heard Edward say, rubbing my back to calm me. I jumped slightly and turned towards him. I wrapped my arms around him tightly, trying to calm my heavy breathing and get the picture of him dead out of my head. I breathed in every bit of his scent trying to convince myself he was still here and it was just a dream. He pulled himself up on the bed with me and laid down pulling me down with him laying me on his chest. He began shushing me and brushing my hair with his fingers trying to calm me a few minutes, I steadied my breathing and fell back to sleep wrapped in Edward's arms.

The next morning I was awoken by Carlisle clearing his throat. I looked up at him and realized I was still curled up in Edward's arms. I started to move away from him but he pulled me back, still half asleep.

"Are you planning to go to school today son?" Edward's eyes shot open, the realization of what was happening coming over him.

"Dad, uh… this isn't… she had a… what time is it?" He stammered.

"It's almost eight o'clock, you need to get up and go to class," Carlisle demanded.

"Right, I'm up, I'm going." Edward pulled himself off the bed and grabbed his bags and walked out the doors as fast as he could before he even had a chance to say goodbye to either one of us.

"I'm sorry Dr. Cullen," I apologized. "I had a really bad dream last night and Edward was just trying to calm me down. I guess we both must have fallen asleep."

"No need to explain," he insisted. "I was given a full report this morning when I came in that you had some sort of episode and Edward was able to calm you."

"The nurses could hear me?" I asked, feeling my cheeks turn red from embarrassment.

"Actually there were two nurses in the room when it happened but they got the impression that you didn't notice them and that Edward was doing a pretty good job calming you himself," he explained, making me turn even redder knowing that there were two nurses in the room during my episode as Dr. Cullen had called it. I turned my head away from him to try and hide my embarrassment.

"Would you like to talk about this dream you had?" He asked, writing stuff down on the chart.

"I don't think I want to. Plus you probably wouldn't like it," I said, turning my head from him. I had an overwhelming feel of guilt come over me for even being able to dream something as incredibly horrible as what I did.

"Alright, I understand. I'm going to have Dr. Weber come by today and speak with you so we can get a schedule for therapy sessions set up," he stated.

"Okay," I said quietly.

"The good news is," he began, bringing my attention back to him. "I think tomorrow we'll be releasing you." I smiled at him excitedly and he lightly chuckled at my enthusiasm to be out of the hospital.

For the rest of the day I worked on all the homework Edward had brought me and around one Dr. Weber came in and asked me some questions and had me talk a little about what happened. She wanted me to talk about the dream I had but I couldn't do it. I didn't want to remember the dream let alone talk about it. I never wanted to think about Edward being dead even if it was just a dream.

Around three Esme brought Seth and Leah by like she promised. I was so happy to see them and to know that they were okay. They told me all about what it was like living with the Cullen's and how much fun they were having now that they didn't have to be scared anymore. I was glad they didn't feel like they had to worry about James but I still did, he was still out there somewhere and I knew he wasn't going to let what happened go away so easily. Plus what if he found a new family to hurt?

A little after five, Edward showed up and brought us burgers from the diner to eat for dinner. Carlisle must have known that Edward was bringing in food because no one even bothered bringing in a dinner tray. We sat up and did our homework and talked late into the night until he finally fell asleep in the chair. I was too afraid of having the nightmare again that I did everything I could to stay awake. I read my book in the dark, I counted the tiles on the ceiling, and I watched the second hand tick around the clock. At one point I carefully got up and walked to the bathroom to throw some cold water on my face. When I came out of the bathroom, I stopped in my tracks when I saw Edward sitting on the bed waiting for me.

"Is there a reason why you aren't sleeping?" He asked. I thought I was being quiet enough so he wouldn't hear me but I guess I was wrong. I walked over and sat down next to him.

"I guess I'm just afraid of having another nightmare," I answered, timidly.

"Would it help if I lay down with you?" He asked.

I didn't know if it would help or not but I wanted him to anyway so I nodded my head. He pulled me to him and laid us both down on the bed, pulling the covers over us. I fell asleep quickly as did he.

Again the next morning we were awoken by Carlisle coming into the room. "I hope you both know that once you get home, there won't be any more of this," he said with an amused smirk.

We sat up quickly and Edward pulled himself to the chair beside me. Edward had explained the day before that his parent's expected him to be in school every day and not skip or be late for anything, along with a long list of other rules, in exchange for allowing us to live with them. Edward rubbed his face and ran his fingers through his hair before standing and lightly kissing me on the forehead and telling me goodbye. Carlisle pretended to be so wrapped up in the chart that he didn't notice but I'm sure he did. It made feel slightly uncomfortable that Edward was so open around his parent's. I wasn't even used to this type of affection from anyone and now Edward was giving it to me right in front of anyone who was around.

Later that day Edward came by earlier than normal with Alice in tow, she had a huge grin on her face as she walked into the room with arms full of bags. Edward left the room and waited outside while Alice dressed me up in new clothes. Most of what I saw in the bags was not stuff I would normally wear but I was willing to give it a try if it would make me look more appropriate to be with Edward. I felt inferior next to him and didn't feel like we should be together at all but I wanted to so I had to prove somehow that I was up to his level.

As soon as I was done getting dressed, Carlisle came in and signed off all the paperwork and told me I was free to go giving me the normal doctor talk of taking it easy and getting lots of rest and not doing anything too strenuous for a while. I didn't understand why he was telling me this since he would most likely make sure I followed all the rules regardless.

Alice hugged me goodbye and wished me good luck before Edward pushed the wheel chair down the hall to his car and helped me get in before he put all the bags from Alice in the trunk. We drove in a comfortable silence. He linked our fingers together and brought my hand to his mouth kissing the back of my hand often. He pulled into the driveway and parked the car and I had this sudden rush of anxiety come over me. What if I broke one of the rules? What if the Cullen's didn't like me? What if they didn't like me spending so much time with Edward? What if I messed up somehow and they wanted me to leave?

Edward obviously noticed my fear, he reached over and squeezed my shoulder and tried to reassure me that everything would be fine. He walked around and opened my door, helping me out and supporting me all the way. We walked in the front doors and were bombarded with welcoming greetings and hugs from Esme, Seth, and Leah.

"We made cookies for your return, and I got to help," Seth shouted happily. We weren't allowed a lot of sweets growing up so this must have been a huge treat for Seth.

"Alright, let's go in the kitchen and get dinner going while Bella get's settled in," Esme suggested escorting Seth and Leah to the kitchen.

I looked over at Edward who had an amused grin on his face. It reminded me so much of Carlisle. He had so much of both of his parents in him that it was hard to tell which parent he took after more. He pulled me towards the stairs and held my hand as we walked up. He showed me that Seth was given the guest bedroom and Leah was given Emmett's old room then we walked to his room but when we walked in, it was different then the way it looked before. The posters were taken down and replaced with a colorful poster of butterflies flying in the clouds and a collage frame of pictures from our trip to the ocean a few weeks ago, a few framed pictures of some Japanese symbols hanging over the bed, and the bed was made up with a light purple bedspread. All the CD's and books were taken off the shelves but there were a few books and CD's still remaining that I didn't remember being there from before. It looked like a completely different room than what I remembered and I wondered if I was wrong and we didn't go into his room.

"I hope you like it," he expressed. "I wasn't really sure what you were into so my mom and I just got some random things we thought would fit your personality. I know you like the classics so I got every book I could think of that you mentioned before, and I got some of the movies that go along with those books. I don't know if you've ever seen them before but we can watch them any time you want. Seth said you liked butterflies so he picked out the poster.

I looked at him curiously trying to figure out what was going on. This was his room, why was he acting like he was giving it to me? "Edward, isn't this your room?" I asked.

He smiled and ducked his head. "It was, but I decided to give it to you," he explained.

"Why would you do that? Edward I can't take your room, where will _you_ sleep?" I questioned. He walked over to me and wrapped his arms around my waist trying to calm me.

"Bella, it's okay. My parent's and I talked about it a lot and thought that you would be more comfortable up here than in the basement bedroom." I looked at him trying to make sense of what he was telling me. "A few years ago my parent's remodeled the basement to look like a small apartment. Complete with a living room, its own bathroom and a bedroom. We were planning on moving my Grandparent's here to live with us but they died before they were able to, so we have this whole second living space downstairs that never gets used and I asked my parent's if I could move down there and give you my room. I figured even though it looks like the rest of the house it might be uncomfortable considering it's still a basement."

"You're giving me your room?" I asked in disbelief.

"Believe me Bella I'm getting the better deal here. I get my own gaming room with a couch and mini fridge, my own bathroom, and my bedroom. Plus on top of that I get you living here with me. I get to see you every day and not have to worry if you're okay or if you're hurt." He pulled me closer to him but still lightly holding me, afraid of hurting me. All I could do was cry from happiness. I didn't deserve any of this, especially not him. I wrapped my arms around him and thanked him for being so wonderful.

"Come here I want to show you these symbols that I made. I thought they were perfect for you." He pulled me over to the side of the bed to look at the framed Japanese symbols that were hung over the bed. He wrapped his arms around me from behind and leaned his chin on the top of my head. "The first one means strength, because I think you are one of the strongest people I have ever met. The next one means peace, because I want you to feel at peace here. The third means freedom, because you are free now and will never again be trapped. The forth means beautiful, because I think you are the most beautiful girl in the world. And the last one means love, because everyone in this house loves you, especially me." He leaned down and left a trail of kisses along my neck. The tears fell down my cheeks even more as he explained each of the symbols. He had a way of making me feel beautiful and loved even if I didn't deserve it. I turned around in his arms and kissed him. Giving him all the love I could in that kiss. My hands curled around his neck and pulled him closer. His arms circled my waist and pulled me as close to him as I could possible get. Our mouths moved together as one while our tongues met in the middle. We kissed for a long time only taking short breaks for air until we heard a throat clearing behind us. I pulled away as fast as I could, my face turning bright red when I saw that it was Esme standing in the doorway.

"So what did you think of the room?" She asked, walking in and looking around trying to ignore the exchange between her son and me.

"It's amazing, thank you so much for everything you are doing for us," I said appreciatively.

"You're most welcome dear, we're happy to have you. And there's no need to thank me though. Edward did most of this himself," she explained.

I looked over at him feeling happy and loved by this perfect man that would do anything for me even if I didn't do anything in return for him. He smiled shyly back at me before he said he was going to go down stairs to gather up all my stuff.

"My son seems rather taken by you," Esme said, nonchalantly while walking through the room. I sat down on the bed to listen to her. "His father and I pushed him into so much trying to prepare him for a bright future where he would have every opportunity at his feet but the only thing he cared about was playing football. We got him piano lessons, and guitar lessons, a Latin tutor, gymnastics, soccer, t-ball, boy scouts, karate, summer camp for the gifted and talented, horseback riding lessons, tennis, church choirs, you name it he's done it. School has always come so easy for him but he never cared much for it or anything else except for football, until you came along. I've never seen him so happy, so alive since you came into his life. He's playing the piano and guitar again, he's shown interest in actually going to college whereas before even the mention of going to college would make him roll his eyes. He says that he loves you, has he told you that?" She asked turning around to face me. I nodded my head not wanting to lie but worried that maybe this wasn't something she wanted to hear. "Do you love him?"

I never actually thought about whether or not I loved him. I think I did, I wanted to but if I did she wasn't the one I wanted to tell first. "I don't know," I decided to say. "I like being with him, and he makes me happy."

"Just take things slow, for his sake," she requested. She came and sat down next to me, placing her hands on mine and looking at me with caring eyes but serious at the same time. "Edward has a lot of potential if he can focus on his future and I want to see him succeed, but if he's distracted by love or an unwanted pregnancy, or thoughts about starting a life with you before its time then he'll be throwing all of that away." I felt sick to my stomach. Was she trying to say that I was a distraction to Edward? That I was getting in the way of his future? I didn't want to do anything that would hurt him. "I'm not saying that I disapprove of your relationship with him, you seem to be good for him in a lot of ways, but I just don't want either of you to jump into anything you aren't ready for or that could mess either of your futures up. Do you understand?" I nodded my head, even though I didn't know exactly what she was trying to say. Thankfully Edward walked in carrying all the bags that Alice had brought to the hospital and plopped them down on the floor in front of me.

"So Alice gave me strict instructions that all of the stuff in the red and blue bags has to be hung up and all the stuff in white bags can go in the drawers," he recited. "She said she was planning on coming by to make sure it was done properly. I don't know if you want me to help or not but I will if you're okay with that."

"Edward, why don't you go down stairs and play a video game with Seth?" Esme suggested. "He's been waiting all afternoon for you to get home so he could play. I'll help Bella get everything put away." Edward looked to me to make sure I was okay with that so I smiled at him lightly letting him know it was okay. He nodded his head and left the room leaving me once again with his mother.

She started going through the bags and brought a handful of hangers to the bed along with a bag of clothes. "Why don't you put these things on hangers and I'll start putting all this stuff in your drawers then I'll hang all that stuff up once you're done?" I did as she said and started pulling things out of the bag putting them on hangers.

Alice had gone overboard on her purchases. She bought me way too much and half of it I probably wouldn't ever wear. But I hung it up anyway.

"It was very nice of Alice to do this for you," Esme said. "Edward tells me she's one of your closest friends."

"She's my only friend besides Edward," I clarified. She looked at me curiously which made me a little nervous but she didn't say anything more on the subject.

Before I knew it we were completely done and heading down stairs for dinner. I walked slowly into the kitchen where Edward was sitting at a barstool with Seth and Leah discussing their video game they just finished playing. Edward turned to see me coming in and jumped up from the stool to help me to a seat.

"Edward, I'm not going to break, I can sit down in a chair by myself," I said laughing.

"Why do you always have to be so stubborn when I want to help you with something?" He asked, looking a little irritated. I smiled sheepishly trying to express how sorry I was but he just laughed and rolled his eyes.

After we were done eating dinner, Edward brought me down stairs to show me his room, or rooms I guess, with Leah and Seth. Seth and Leah played video games while Edward and I sat on the couch. I was a little hesitant at first to go down there but once I saw that it looked like the rest of the house and nothing like the basement I remembered I took a chance and went down. Seth wanted to show me every detail of the game he was playing and how good he was at it. Before too long I had fallen asleep on Edward's shoulder, I didn't wake until a little while later when I felt someone carrying me upstairs. I opened my eyes slightly when I was laid down on the bed and saw Edward standing over me.

He covered me up with the blankets and leaned into my ear to whisper. "Good night Bella, I'll see you in the morning." He kissed me gently on the cheek and headed for the door. I fell asleep quickly and breathed in Edward's scent that was still embedded into the mattress. For the first time in my life I felt like I was home. I slept better that night than I had ever before and when I woke the next morning my body felt whole again. The aches and pains were tremendously subsiding, but when I looked in the mirror before I took a shower the bruises were still very visible. I pulled out a long sleeve shirt and a pair of jeans to change into then went downstairs. After breakfast, Carlisle and Esme went to the office to work while Seth and Leah raced each other down to Edward's room to play more video games. Edward took my hand and led me down the stairs where we sat on the couch most of the day just wrapped in each other's arms. Later that night after Seth and Leah were told to go to bed Edward and I sat on his couch to watch a movie. He brought down the film adaptation of Pride and Prejudice. I loved it and wanted to watch it again as soon as it was over.

After Edward turned the movie off we sat on the couch for quite a while talking and holding hands and kissing a little. Which I liked but I was really nervous about since it seemed like every time we did start kissing we would get interrupted. After a while we heard Carlisle call down stairs telling us we needed to go to bed. Edward rolled his eyes and huffed but did as he was told. He was bound by rules much more than I was I think.

Sunday went about the same as the day before with the exception that Emmett came by for breakfast and spent most of the day watching football with Edward. I sat on the couch in the living room next to Edward reading a book. During the commercials he would always turn towards me and want to engage in some sort of conversation but once the game would come back on his attention was back on the TV.

When Monday came I was extremely nervous. I knew people were going to be talking and asking questions and I didn't really want to talk about any of it, especially not with people I barely knew. Alice came by that morning out of the blue to help me cover up the bruises that were still on my face. I was extremely thankful that she did.

Edward pulled up into a parking spot and shut the car off and turned to look at me. "Are you ready?" He asked. I nodded my head even though inside I was begging him to turn around and go home. He got out and came to open up my door, helping me out gently. Then he reached in the back seat to grab both of our bags. I could already feel all eyes on me in the parking lot and we weren't even in the school yet. I turned around towards Edward about to tell him to take me home but he leaned down and kissed me gently on the lips and linked our fingers together. "It's going to be okay, I'll be by your side every step of the way." I took a deep breath and followed him towards the doors.

Everyone was staring as we walked through the halls. A lot of the girls gave me dirty looks and even a few of the guys. A couple girls were even bold enough to walk up to Edward and hand them their phone numbers. He graciously took them and stuck them in his pocket. I looked at him with a raised eyebrow wondering why he did that. "It happens every day, there's always some freshman girl who gets the nerve to approach me and give me her phone number. I always accept them and then toss them in the garbage when I get home. I've never actually called any of them but they still try."

"They do this even when you're walking with another girl?" I asked, with curiosity. "Did they do that when you were with Jessica?"

"Not as often but every once in a while they would, Jessica used to get off on it."

"That's really strange," I commented. He just laughed it off but I couldn't help the jealousy I felt when he took them willingly and stuck them in his pocket. I did believe him that he wouldn't call them but it still didn't seem right to give them false hope like that.

We stopped at his locker and he put our stuff away keeping only the books we needed for our class in his bag. He glanced over at me and obviously could tell I was irritated and nervous and scared and probably a thousand other emotions. "Hey," he said getting my attention. He pulled me into a hug and kissed the top of my head. "We'll get through this together okay?" He leaned in and met his lips to mine moving my lips with his. He pulled me closer and deepened the kiss making me relax completely. When he pulled away, he leaned his forehead against mine and looked deep into my eyes. I could feel everyone around us staring but Edward's full attention was on me. "Let's get to class." He pulled away linking our fingers together again and shutting the locker. We walked down the hall and into the classroom. Every class I went to that day the teacher's greeted me with huge hugs and "welcome back" which was nice to hear. I never thought I would be happy to be back at school but the thought that I came very close to never seeing this place again made me glad that I was still here. Edward stayed by my side throughout the entire day and even the classes we didn't have together he would still make sure to walk me there and be there after class was over.

Some people did ask questions, but if Edward was with me he would tell them to leave me alone or to not be so nosey. I was thankful for that but the few times he wasn't with me and someone would ask I usually clammed up and ducked my head pretending not to hear them. I didn't want to answer questions about James or how I was or what happened. I just wanted everyone to avoid me like they used to.

Most of the day went by fine, even lunch was okay. I did feel a lot of eyes on me but Edward stayed close and wrapped his arm around my shoulders protectively. Alice was beaming with joy that we were together and happy. The rest of the week went by about the same with less and less stares and questions. There was only one incident that really bothered me. During last period, Jessica came up to me and tried to intimidate me by saying that Edward was only with me because I was easy since I was already messed up just like my mom was. He was with me to make her jealous and eventually they would get back together. Even all her friends agreed with her and tried to convince me that Edward and I would never last. I didn't know if it would or not but I wasn't going to let something that Jessica said convince me of that. I never once got that impression from Edward and there was no way she was going to convince me differently. I just ignored her and smiled which in turn made her glare at me.

On Friday night Edward and I watched another movie and spent some time with Seth and Leah. It was strange now that we were living with the Cullen's because I hardly ever saw Seth and Leah at all anymore. Leah spent a lot of time with Esme and Seth was always following one of the Cullen men around, wanting to know what they were doing and asking if he could help or play too. Edward even continued giving him the guitar lessons, which he loved. After the movie was over Edward walked me back up stairs and said goodnight to his parent's then he followed me up to the second floor where Edward told me goodnight and kissed me deeply, his hands exploring the hem of my shirt, searching for any skin he could find to touch. After a few minutes we heard Esme call up the stairs for Edward to come down to take out the garbage. We both knew it was only an excuse. "We need to get out of here," he stressed. "How do you feel about going out tomorrow?"

"I guess so, if you want to," I replied.

"Are you sure you'll be up to it?" He asked. "We don't have to do anything strenuous, we can just go see a movie and go to dinner or something."

"That actually sounds great, I'd like that a lot," I said, excited.

A huge smile spread across his face and he kissed me once more. "Good, I can't wait to have you all to myself." He headed for the door and left the room. I pulled on some pajamas and crawled into bed really excited to be going out with Edward. This would be our first time really being alone since that first time he took me to the Italian restaurant. I hoped he didn't want to go back there. I didn't want to face Heidi if she happened to be there. Emmett had told us that he talked to her and she was extremely shocked by the outcome of events after thanksgiving. She assured him that she hasn't seen or heard from James since that weekend. But Emmett was suspicious so he asked a friend of his who worked for the Port Angeles police force to keep an eye on her and see if anyone comes or goes from her home or work that fits the description of James. Emmett seemed determined to find James, no matter what cost. Edward explained that it had a lot to do with trust, because Emmett trusted him completely and they were good friends. James was the whole reason Emmett joined the police academy so he had a grudge against him as did the rest of us but he was the only one who could really do anything about it.

The next morning Emmett came over for breakfast as it seemed to be a normal occurrence for Emmett to come over on weekends. For most of the day he watched me and Edward intently and it made me nervous but Edward didn't seem to notice or care. Around three, I realized that I was going out on a date with Edward in public and my face and body was still very much bruised. I needed help covering at least the bruises on my face so I called Alice for advice. She rushed over quickly and brought a huge container full of supplies like she did that first day back at school and pulled me upstairs to get me ready. She worked for a long time applying the makeup as gently as possible. Then she started in on my hair, curling it and pinning portions of it up while leaving other parts down. Then she went into my closet and pulled out a slinky dress that I instantly shook my head to. "Alice, we're just going to a movie and dinner. I don't need to dress like I'm going to a dance. Plus I'll freeze if I wear that."

She rolled her eyes at me but listened and went back into the closet pulling out a pair of dark blue jeans and a white silky blouse with a scoop neck and a gathering at the waist. It was actually a very nice outfit, but I didn't know how it would look on me. I tried it on and I looked so different than I normally did. Alice finished it off with a light weight grey jacket with fur around the collar and a pair of simple tennis shoes. She wanted me to wear a pair of black boots with a heel but there was no way I was going to put those on. That's all I needed, to trip and fall, landing myself back in the hospital.

After Alice was done she smiled looking pleased with her creation. I had to admit I looked really nice and I felt good about myself. I just hoped Edward approved. We left the bedroom and headed down stairs but I stopped abruptly when I heard people yelling and arguing down stairs. I listened for a minute trying to figure out what was going on.

"You can't possibly be serious about this Emmett, you want to chaperone my date?" I heard Edward ask.

"Edward it's not like that at all. We don't know where James is, he could follow you, be waiting for you to be alone. We have cops circling the schools during the day and I've been staying close to here," Emmett replied. "But if you go off to Port Angeles there's no one there to keep a close eye on you."

"I can't believe you aren't even going to let me take my girlfriend out without being watched the whole time."

"Edward, I won't get in the way, you won't even know I'm there. But you're my little brother and I have to look out for you," Emmett responded. "You put this family in danger because you wanted her, now it's my job to keep everyone safe." I never thought of it before but he was right, I put Edward's entire family in danger and that was most likely the reason they were allowing us to stay here because it's easier for our small police force to protect us when we're all in one spot. The Cullen's didn't really want us here, it was just the easiest way to keep everyone safe and make sure Edward didn't get hurt. I started remembering the dream I had of Edward dead in the woods and it made sense now. The way Edward was going through the woods to see me before he probably would have continued to do that if I was somewhere else and James could have found him that way and killed him.

"Edward," I heard Carlisle say. "Your brother's right, I know you don't like it, but this is what you chose so this is the way it has to be."

"Whatever," I heard Edward grumble before storming off down to his room and slamming the door.

Alice, who had been standing next to me the entire time, squeezed my arm and guiding me down the stairs. "It'll be okay, he's mad but he'll get over it. I can see both points but I think it would be best if Emmett went with you," Alice reasoned.

"I agree," I said. We walked the rest of the way down stairs to gawking eyes coming from everyone. I could feel my face turning bright red.

"You look so pretty Bella," Seth complimented. I smiled at him and thanked him.

"Well I guess I can understand why Edward likes you so much," Emmett said. "You're gorgeous Bella."

I was getting really uncomfortable with everyone staring at me, I looked over at Alice for some sort of help but she was only beaming with pride like she was showing off her newest piece of art. Thankfully Esme cut in and helped me.

"Let's get you a scarf and gloves since all you have on is this thin coat," she suggested. Alice protested, saying it would throw the whole outfit off but Esme didn't want me to freeze. When I heard Edward come back upstairs he stopped for a brief second when he saw me. I expected him to say something sweet like how pretty I looked but he didn't say anything. He walked to the coat closet and pulled on his jacket then asked if I was ready to go. I nodded my head feeling kind of nervous that maybe he was mad at me for something. It hurt my feelings that he didn't even seem to acknowledge me when he came up stairs. I followed him out the door and Emmett followed too getting into his own car while Edward opened the door for me of his car. I slid into the seat and waited for him to get in next to me. He started up the car and turned up the heat. We sat there in silence while we waited for the windows to defrost.

"Bella," he spoke, making me jump from the sudden noise breaking through the silence. "I'm so sorry about this. I know it sucks and I'll make it up to you somehow."

"Its fine Edward, I don't care if your brother is with us," I insisted.

"But it's really not. I wanted this to be about us. Everywhere we go we have people watching or getting in the way. I just wanted one night where it could be us." He complained.

"Edward, it's really okay. I would rather have your brother lurking in the shadows keeping us safe than be surprised by James somewhere," I explained. "And just think it could have been a lot worse. They could have asked that we take Seth and Leah along, or we could have had to have Emmett ride with us." He laughed and leaned in pulling my head and lips to his. His other hand found my waist and pulled my shirt up slightly. My hands went inside his coat and in his shirt feeling his stomach muscles. He pulled away slightly to look at me.

"This is why I love you, because even in a shitty situation you still find the good out of it," he laughed. "I'm sorry for being such a jerk in the house, I should have told you how beautiful you are the minute I set eyes on you but I was mad and I wasn't thinking."

"It's okay, I understand," I said.

"You really are beautiful though, even without all this that Alice does. You're always beautiful."

"Thank you," I accepted. "You aren't so bad yourself you know?" He laughed and brushed my cheek with his fingers leaning in to kiss me once again. We barely started kissing before we heard a tap on the window. Edward pulled away and rolled down the window slightly.

"So uh, are you planning on having your date in the driveway or are you actually going to leave soon?" Emmett asked sarcastically.

Edward huffed and rolled his eyes. "We're going?" He exclaimed. I could sense the irritation building up in him again so I reached over and rubbed the back of his neck. He calmed instantly to my touch and pulled the car out of the driveway with Emmett following behind.

We talked casually as we drove to Port Angeles. This time we went to a Mexican restaurant. Emmett stayed in his car keeping a close watch on anyone who entered or exited the restaurant.

"I feel like I'm some huge star or the president that has to bring around a body guard everywhere I go," Edward complained. "I can't even take you out to dinner without someone accompanying us. How do fucking movie stars deal with this no privacy stuff?"

"Edward, it's really not that big of a deal. I don't even notice. I wish you would stop getting so upset about it," I pleaded.

"Can I ask you something?" He questioned.

"Of course you can."

"How do you do it?" I looked at him with a confused look. "How do you not let things bother you? I mean you get the crap beat out of you almost on a daily basis for years and never once say anything to anyone and still go on taking care of everyone and making others happy. How do you always find the good stuff out of all the bad stuff that happens?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "I guess it's just something my mom taught me. She loved the movie Pollyanna and we would watch it all the time before James came along. That really was the only thing that got me by day after day. I just had to always look at anything positive out of whatever was bad. Look at us for instance. I almost died in that hole but you saved me and pulled me out and now here we are holding hands in a crowded restaurant, kissing in the halls at school, and living in the same house. If that hadn't happened I see two outcomes, either I would have ran with Seth and Leah and never seen you again or I would have refused to say anything and you probably would have given up on me and left us to whatever our fate was with James. What James did was kind of a blessing in disguise."

"Bella I would have never given up on you, I would have kept fighting as long as you were still fighting," he declared. I smiled and went back to eating.

"So what do you want for Christmas?" He asked, changing the subject.

I looked at him shocked by the question. I hadn't celebrated Christmas in so many years it never even crossed my mind that it was coming up. "I already have everything I could ever want," I responded.

"I have to get you something," he countered.

"Well what do you want?" I questioned.

"You," he said, nonchalantly. I smirked at him, and rolled my eyes. "I'm being serious you know."

"Is that why you're so upset about Emmett following us? Did you have some big plan to get lucky tonight?" I asked jokingly.

"Maybe not "lucky" but at least access to some exploration," he explained, sheepishly.

"And what if I told you I wasn't ready for that?" I asked.

"I wouldn't push you to do anything you weren't ready for. Even if all we did was make out that would be fine," He disclosed.

Well I don't think I would mind that," I confessed. We both laughed and continued to eat.

"I was serious though, what can I give you for Christmas?" He emphasized.

"I don't know Edward, you've already given me so much I can't ask for more," I answered truthfully.

"Alright, I'll figure it out on my own then," he said, ending the subject.

Once we were done eating we headed back out to the car and motioned to Emmett so he knew we were leaving. Edward drove to the theatre and parked. Emmett got out and asked if he could come into the theatre with us because he was freezing and he didn't want to sit outside for two more hours. I instantly told him yes but Edward rolled his eyes and sighed before turning towards the doors dragging me behind him.

"Edward, he's your brother. Stop acting like a five year old. I think he's actually been rather decent through this whole night with the way you've been treating him," I stressed.

"I think you should listen to the girl Edward, I mean I am the one sitting out in the cold keeping your ass from getting shot. You could show a little appreciation," Emmett said from behind us. Edward stiffened slightly but calmed again once I started rubbing his neck. Emmett sat down a few rows in front of us and Edward was happy that he didn't insist on sitting next to us. The movie was kind of lame but I hadn't been to a movie in so long that it was kind of fun. Edward was holding my hand and occasionally rubbed his thumb across my knuckles. I could see him looking my way but I was too nervous to look in his direction. Our conversation in the restaurant freaked me out a little and I wasn't sure if I was ready for what Edward wanted. At some point he leaned over into my hair. His soft lips left a trail of kisses along my neck, he sucked on my earlobe and his fingers brushed across my collarbone. I closed my eyes and smiled at the sensation that ran through my body. I sighed and moaned. He turned my head with his hand finding my lips with his. Our lips moved together, his hand snaked its way down the front of my blouse finding the hem, pulling it up to be able to get his fingers on the bare skin of my stomach. He wrapped his long fingers around my waist and pulled me closer to him. My fingers wrapped around his neck and ran through his hair. His hand came down and rested on my knee and slowly started moving in between my legs. That was too much and I pulled away gasping. He pulled away from me looking worried, his hands held up in surrender.

"Sorry," I whispered.

"It's okay," he whispered back. "Come here." He held out his arms for me, I leaned into his chest and he wrapped his arms around me. We sat like that for the rest of the movie. I occasionally could feel him kiss my head or nuzzle into my hair.

After the movie was over we hurried out to the car and turned up the heat. It was getting very cold out and there was talk of it starting to snow soon. As soon as the heat was working and the windows defrosted we headed home.

Once we pulled into the driveway Edward jumped out and came over to open my door for me.

"I'm going to go inside and find something to eat, I'm starving. Unfortunately my little brother's an ass and didn't think about bringing me anything to eat," Emmett said sarcastically, walking past us.

"Well no one asked you to come along in the first place," Edward shouted.

"Be sure and kiss her good night properly," Emmett joked. He headed up the steps and through the door before I was even completely out of the car. We walked through the front door hand in hand and noticed Esme and Carlisle in the living room watching TV. They turned to face us as soon as we walked in.

"So how did things go?" Carlisle asked.

"Things went well I think," Emmett said coming up behind us eating a sandwich. "Although I don't think Edward had much fun until about half way through the movie." Emmett smirked and chuckled. Edward sighed and glared at him.

"Can Edward come upstairs with me for just a minute?" I asked. "I need to give him a book he wanted to borrow."

"That's fine dear, but just for a minute," Esme offered. I pulled Edward towards the stairs and went up to my room with him. Once inside I shut the door and attacked him with a kiss. He laughed into my mouth at first but returned the kiss and wrapped his arms around my waist.

"Edward," I said breathlessly when I pulled away.

"Hmm," he hummed continuing to leave open mouthed kisses down my chin and neck.

"I had a lot of fun, thank you for taking me out," I breathed. He pulled me into a tight hug and slightly lifted me off the ground. I gasped in pain and he instantly pulled away.

"I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking," he apologized, looking sad.

As soon as I could breathe normally again I grabbed his hand to come sit down on the bed with me. I laid against his chest before I began to talk. There was something I wanted to say to him that I had wanted to say for a while but it was never the right time.

"Those Japanese symbols you made, how did you make them?" I asked.

He laughed and turned to look at them. "It's really stupid actually," he responded. "I just found some black square frames at the store and then printed out the symbols off the internet." He looked at me like he was embarrassed about it but I thought it was the sweetest thing he could have done. He took the time to look up the symbols and print them out and put them together. Symbols that he said represented me.

"You know those symbols don't exactly describe me, they describe you more," I said.

"Why do you think that?" He asked. I turned my body slightly so I could look up into his eyes.

"You are my strength, you give me peace, you gave me freedom, at least more than what I had before." He chuckled knowing exactly what I meant. "You make me feel beautiful, and you give me love. And I love you for all of that." I slurred the last part. I knew he would have understood but I was so nervous about saying it that it came out all wrong.

A huge smile spread across his lips. 'Did you just say that you love me?" I nodded my head too nervous to say anything and took a deep breath. He leaned down taking my lips in his kissing me passionately. His hands once again explored the skin around my stomach and back, inching there way further into my shirt.

"Edward, it's time to come down stairs now," Carlisle called.

"Damn it, can't they give me five minutes?" He exclaimed. I laughed. He crawled off the bed and headed for the door.

"Hey," I shouted to get his attention before he stepped out in the hall. He turned around and I tossed a book at him. He was caught off guard and barely caught it. He looked back up at me raising an eyebrow, questioning why I threw a book at him.

"You were supposed to come up here to get a book remember? There's your book," I said smiling. He looked down to read the title and furrowed his eyebrows when he saw that it was a new copy of "Pride and Prejudice" that was on the shelf when I moved in. He gave me his half smile and walked back over to me leaning down on the bed, hovering over me to kiss me once more.

"Unfortunately, I've already read this book," he said seductively.

"You did?" I asked, confused.

"Yeah, see there was this girl that I really liked and she would sit next to me every day at lunch reading this book and ignoring me completely. I wanted to know what was so intriguing about it that would make her not want to talk to me, so I read it," he joked. "I didn't find it very fascinating, but I guess to a girl it might be really good, at least to that girl it is." I smiled at him before he leaned in once more giving me a chaste kiss.

"Good night," I whispered.

"Good night." He kissed me on the tip of the nose before standing up. He walked over to the book shelf and grabbed a different book before exiting the room to head back downstairs.


	15. Chapter 14

Sorry this chapter is so late but some good news is next chapter is just about done so it should be up very soon. There are some lemons coming up in the next few chapters so anyone who is too young to read that or anyone who isn't intersted in reading that shouldn't. Also thanks for all the reviews and PM's, I appreciate them.

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters.

I know everyone wants to get to the chapter to see what happens next and I apologize that it took so long but I wanted to tell everyone a little story first and I'll try to make it quick. A 16 year old girl stopped breathing at her home one night and someone called 911, she was later pronounced dead at the hospital. The cause of death was torture and maiming and years of abuse caused by her mother and step father. She was homeschooled, kept to herself, didn't have any friends. Neighbors said she was quiet and if they saw her in the yard and tried to say hi she would look away and go back in the house. No one ever had any trouble with the family and the owner of the house that they rented from said they seemed like a normal, typical family. But they had a dark secret that in the end cost this 16 year old girl her life. She had a younger sister age 12 and brother age 5. This happened in my hometown not more than 10 miles away from where I live, last week. This true story obviously hit home to me and the whole point of my fictional story I guess is to make people aware that this type of thing happens daily and could be happening right under your nose and you would never know. I'm sure everyone is aware of that fact in their own way but if you ever suspect that someone is being hurt or not taken care of properly please do something because you never know who's life you may be saving. Not everyone is going to have an Edward save them. Okay I'm done, I'll get off my soap box now. Enjoy the chapter.

* * *

**Stand: Rascal Flatts**

You feel like a candle in a hurricane  
Just like a picture with a broken frame  
Alone and helpless  
Like you've lost your fight  
But you'll be alright, you'll be alright

Cause when push comes to shove  
You taste what you're made of  
You might bend, till you break  
Cause its all you can take  
On your knees you look up  
Decide you've had enough  
You get mad you get strong  
Wipe your hands shake it off  
Then you Stand, Then you stand

Life's like a novel  
With the end ripped out  
The edge of a canyon  
With only one way down  
Take what you're given before its gone  
Start holding on, keep holding on

Cause when push comes to shove  
You taste what you're made of  
You might bend, till you break  
Cause its all you can take  
On your knees you look up  
Decide you've had enough  
You get mad you get strong  
Wipe your hands shake it off  
Then you Stand, Then you stand

Everytime you get up  
And get back in the race  
One more small piece of you  
Starts to fall into place  
Oh

Cause when push comes to shove  
You taste what you're made of  
You might bend, till you break  
Cause its all you can take  
On your knees you look up  
Decide you've had enough  
You get mad you get strong  
Wipe your hands shake it off  
Then you Stand, Then you stand

**EPOV**

When I woke up on Sunday morning, I smelled something delicious wafting into my room. I figured mom was cooking something for breakfast since she normally cooks on Sunday mornings. I rubbed my eyes and ran my fingers through my hair before I looked over at the clock sitting on my nightstand. When I saw that it was already 11 am, I thought maybe something was wrong with my clock but my watch said the same thing. I didn't understand why no one had woken me up. This new bed was uncomfortable to say the least and I had a hard time sleeping in it. I woke up most days even more tired than when I went to bed. Even though I liked my new room since it had all the perks of the game room and more space I missed my bed, it was well adjusted to me and comfortable. But to see Bella happy and smiling was well worth the sacrifice. I'd figure out how to adjust to this new bed in time. I pulled myself up and walked out into my living room area and froze when I saw Bella sitting on my couch with a tray of food sitting on the table in front of her. She turned around once she heard me coming and smiled.

"It's about time, I thought I was going to have to wake you up myself," she said, sarcastically.

I walked over to the couch staring at her questioningly. "What's all this," I asked, motioning to the food on the tray.

"I made us breakfast," she replied, nonchalantly.

I sat down next to her, and she instantly starting handing me food. She made French toast and bacon, along with a bowl of grapes and orange juice to drink. "Why did you make breakfast? Normally my mom does that on Sunday morning's," I asked.

"Your mom and Leah went Christmas shopping, your dad was called into the hospital early this morning and Emmett came by a little bit ago to work on his jeep in the garage. Seth is out there with him," she explained. "So I made breakfast, or I guess it's more like brunch now."

"So what do you want to do today?" I asked, taking a bite of the French toast. The realization that we were pretty much alone for the time being, made me wonder if she had planned this breakfast for us while everyone was gone.

"I still have some homework to finish but it shouldn't take long," she explained. "What do you want to do?"

I shrugged my shoulders. 'I'm sure we'll think of something." She continued to eat as I watched her. She looked nervous, almost scared of something and a little tired. I couldn't figure out why, she has never been nervous just sitting next to me before.

"Are you okay?" I asked, concerned.

"I'm fine," she slurred, staring at her plate. I wondered if maybe it was about what happened in the theatre. I knew I went too far and I should have stopped but I wasn't thinking at that moment. But then again if it had bothered her so much that she would be nervous around me, she wouldn't have told me she loved me last night in her room. I continued watching her all through breakfast, which was delicious, but I barely noticed. Something was wrong and I wanted to know what it was.

After breakfast I headed to the shower while she took the dishes upstairs to clean. When I was done with my shower I went upstairs and saw her standing in the kitchen wiping down the counter tops in nothing but a pair of tight jeans and a dark blue tank top, and bare feet, with her hair falling all around her shoulders. She looked so incredibly sexy. I guess I was so concerned about why she seemed upset down stairs to even notice what she looked like. I looked around to make sure no one was around then snuck up behind her wrapping my arms around her waist from behind. She was startled at first but eased back into me.

"Thank you for breakfast, it was amazing," I said into her hair. I moved her hair out of the way and started kissing her neck. She tilted her head slightly to allow better access. She reached back wrapping her hand around my neck to pull me to her lips. I kissed her softly, trying to remember to be as gentle as possible. I broke away grabbing her hand and pulling her along with me towards my room. Once inside I shut the door and pulled her too me, kissing her deeply. She giggled lightly into my mouth at first but molded her body to mine kissing me back. I walked us back to the bed and laid us down never breaking the kiss. I wasn't planning to do anything since she made it perfectly clear last night she wasn't ready but I did want to hold her in my arms and just revel in the feel of her body pressed against mine. We lay side by side wrapped in each other's arms only releasing briefly to breathe. At some point I ended up hovering over her trying not to put any weight on her since she was still recovering. I kissed down her neck and across her shoulders. She tasted like vanilla and cinnamon and I loved it. I reached down pulling her leg up hitching it over my hip, positioning myself in between her legs. I kept waiting for her to tell me to stop, but she didn't.

"Bella," I said, nibbling on her ear. Her breathing was heavy and erratic. "You can tell me to stop if I go too far."

"I don't want you to stop," she whispered. "I belong to you and it's what you want." I was excited because she didn't want to stop, but then she said she belonged to me and that scared me. I pulled away looking at her intently. She was shaking lightly and her eyes were clenched shut tightly. She opened her eyes slowly looking at me curiously. I pulled away from her and lay down on my back. She sat up on her elbows still staring at me like she didn't know what happened.

"What's wrong?" She asked.

"Bella, why did you say you belong to me?" I asked. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "I don't want you to belong to me. I want you to belong to yourself. I want you to make your own decisions and not always try to please everyone, especially me. You can tell me no or to stop. You don't have to do anything just because you think it's what I want. I'm not going to get mad at you if you aren't ready. I can wait, you know?"

"But… I want to," she said hesitantly. I could tell she was lying but I didn't understand why. She got up and straddled my waist, leaning down to kiss my neck. It felt so good I didn't want her to stop. My hands began pulling her shirt up, wanting to feel her skin. She sat up and pulled her shirt off all the way revealing her body. She still had on a bra but she was so tempting. I wanted to touch her and taste her. I couldn't take my eyes off of her breasts and I so badly wanted to reach behind her and remove the bra. I took a quick peek up to her face and saw a fear and sadness in her eyes. I knew this was wrong and she didn't want this even though she was saying she did. I pulled myself into a sitting position still allowing her to sit on my lap. I took her hands into mine and kissed both of them.

"Why did you stop?" She asked.

"Because you aren't ready Bella," I explained. "I can see how scared you are and I don't want you to ever be scared of me."

"I am ready," she tried to say. "I want this Edward, I really do." Her eyes were getting misty and her voice cracked from trying to hold in the tears.

"Bella, something's wrong, I can tell and I want to know what it is," I said. "Did my parents or Emmett say something to you? Did something happen? Just tell me what it is."

"Isn't this what I'm supposed to do, to make you happy?" She questioned. "To make you not want to leave me?" I stared at her trying to figure out what she was trying to ask me. "Alice and Jasper have sex, so do a lot of other kids in school. You've even been with Jessica, and don't try to deny it because I had to listen to her tell Lauren all about in class one time." I felt sick to my stomach, I was sure she wasn't stupid and would have known but hearing her tell me she knew hurt. I didn't want her to think she had to compete with Jessica. I never loved Jessica, but I know I love her. And I definitely didn't want her to feel like she had to have sex just because everyone else was.

"Bella, Jessica was a huge mistake that I can never take back. I can't change that but you don't need to feel threatened by her or feel like you need to live up to her," I tried to explain.

A tear slid down her cheek and I reached up to wipe it away. "Baby, just tell me what's wrong," I said sadly.

"You're going to leave me," she said, more as a fact than a fear she had.

"I'm not leaving you Bella," I said. "I love you and just because we aren't having sex doesn't mean I'm going to leave you."

"But I'm not good enough for you, Edward. It doesn't make sense for us to be together. It doesn't make sense for you to want to be with me. You're the captain of the football team, school president, all around Mr. Popular. I'm the shy, plain girl who no one ever knew existed until it spread all over town that I got beat up by my step dad and Edward Cullen saved me from him," she said, beginning to cry. "You could have anyone you want, who would be much more experienced and knowledgeable on how to make you happy." I took her face into my hands and pulled her to me, kissing her gently. I leaned my forehead against hers and wiped the tears away with my thumbs.

"I don't care if it makes sense or not, I don't want anyone else, I want you and that's all that matters to me. You don't have to do anything to keep me around. I'm not that type of a man, especially not with you. I'm happy just spending time with you and knowing that you're safe," I said.

"But what about what you said last night?" She whispered.

"I'm not going to lie, I've thought about it, a lot," I admitted. "But I don't want to push you into anything and then you regret it afterwards. If we ever get to that point, and I hope someday we do, I want it to be because you're completely ready and not because you think you have to."

"Okay," she whimpered. I rubbed her arms and reached down for her shirt. She took it from my hand and put it back on, not making eye contact with me.

"Bella, are you alright?" I asked, trying to force eye contact with her.

"I'm fine, really." She forced a smile and met my eyes briefly before she got up off the bed. "I should probably finish my homework." She walked out of my room and I heard her ascend the stairs rather quickly.

I sat on my bed a little while longer to calm down a little after what happened and to make sense of it all. Why did she think I was going to leave her? Why does she seem so scared? There was one thing I knew for sure, I had to make her believe that my love for her was real and I wasn't going to leave her because we weren't having sex. She obviously has a lot of insecurities which I'm sure James instilled in her mind, but I wanted that to change. I got the impression what I said last night, even though part of me meant it, made her think that all I wanted her for was sex. But that was farthest from the truth, I wanted her to feel important because she is important to a lot of people and I want her to feel worthy of my love and not someone I was using for my own gratifications. From now on I had to be careful about what I said or did and make sure it's all for the right reasons because I don't want her to get the wrong idea about what I want from her. I want her to heal and be able to live a normal life and make her own decisions and learn to let go.

When I finally went back upstairs, I looked towards the kitchen and saw Bella making something while Seth and Emmett watched. She was giggling at Emmett's jokes and at Seth trying to copy every little thing Emmett did. But she was lost. Her eyes were sullen, dark, like she hadn't slept; it was like she was looking through them. I walked up to the counter and sat down next to Emmett on the barstool.

"Hey bro, did you sleep long enough today or what?" Emmett asked, sarcastically.

"It's hard adjusting to a new bed you know?" I responded.

"You are such a baby," he said.

"Shut up Emmett," I said, glaring at him.

I looked up at Bella who half smiled at me when our eyes met. I knew whatever it was that was bothering her went deeper than what happened today or last night.

"So why aren't you following mom and Leah around today while they shop? Or are babysitting duties only for me and Bella?" I asked.

"Officer Garrett is undercover, following mom and Leah all over Port Angeles right now," he replied, with an irritated tone.

"Why is he undercover?" I asked, actually very curious why he would be undercover when Emmett was right out in the open with us last night.

"We had a meeting this morning and thought it would be best to stay incognito so if James is watching from afar waiting for his chance to get to one of you he won't be scared off with one of us with you," he explained. Bella listened quietly while she stirred whatever it was she was mixing in the bowl. Seth went into the living room to watch cartoons. I guess he thought our grown-up talk was too boring.

"'So what, you're using mom and Leah as bait to lure James out?" I was starting to get irritated that he would be willing to put them in danger to catch James. Was he planning to use Bella as bait too? Even though I was upset about him tagging along last night, he was right. I couldn't let her be in danger ever again. And if he needed to follow us around until he was caught then so be it.

"We're not using them as bait, Edward," he said, infuriated by the question. "We're staying close by all of you. Personally if I know James well enough, which I thought I did, he's going to hold a grudge and going to come back so I have to keep you all safe. I know you don't like it and I'll give you all the space you need but I'm not going to just let you go traipsing off by yourself without some sort of protection. We've actually had to call in to some of the neighboring counties to help out a little and there were quite a few members of the community who wanted to volunteer their time in keeping everyone safe."

"Why is everyone worried about keeping us safe?" Bella asked. Both Emmett and I looked in her direction by her sudden interruption.

"It's not just about you, Seth and Leah," Emmett explained. "It's about the whole community. Everyone was severely disturbed by the news that the one person in this community that we all thought we could trust and depend on was actually a monster. From what you and Edward have told us he's not only a child abuser but he may be a murderer too and that doesn't sit well with people in our small town. They want him brought to justice and want him to pay for what he did and they want to feel safe again. Right now everyone is scared. We don't know what to expect with him, we've never had to deal with anything like this before, so it's got everyone on edge. And until he's found no one will feel safe." I watched Bella while he explained the fear everyone in Forks was feeling and I could see it in her face that she was taking the blame for it all. She felt responsible for making everyone scared and worried about what would happen next. I didn't like her feeling that way. None of this was her fault and she shouldn't have to feel like it is. "We're all actually having a lot of fun with this turn of events. Finally, we have a little excitement in this dead town and get to use the skills we were trained to use." Of course Emmett would have to think this whole mess was fun. Sometimes I wondered if we were actually related. We were nothing alike and had little in common. Football was about the only interest we shared a passion for.

"Emmett," Seth yelled from the kitchen. "Are we still going to watch football today?"

"Oh, that's right, the game is about to start," Emmett said starting to get up from his seat. "Are you planning to watch with us Edward? Seth has taken quite an interest in football. I think we'll need to get him playing next year. He reminds me of you when you were that age always following me around." He laughed loudly at his own memories like it was funny that his little brother followed him around and now he has a new little kid following him around. I didn't find the humor in it but I guess he did.

"I'll be there in a minute," I replied, hoping that would appease him so he would leave. I wanted to talk to Bella without him around cracking jokes at my expense every few minutes.

"Bella, none of this is your fault." I said once Emmett was completely gone and we were left alone. I felt like just saying it without asking her if she was alright was the better route. I knew she wouldn't tell me anything. She would continue to tell me that she was fine and that I had nothing to worry about. But I knew her pretty well by now and she couldn't hide it from me. "What James did is his responsibility and he needs to be held accountable for his actions not you. You didn't put this town in a state of fear, James did. Don't blame yourself for something you had no control over." I could see the tears welling up in her eyes as she nodded her head vigorously. She was trying to convince herself that I was right but she was failing miserably. I understood why my father said she would need counseling after all of this. I thought after getting her away from him and giving her a sense of security would make everything better, but I was realizing that he still had a hold on her, she was still hurting and still afraid of him and I didn't think I could help her this time. She had to do this on her own. She was meeting with Dr. Weber tomorrow for the first time since she's been out of the hospital and I hoped it would help her.

I decided that it would be a good idea to change the subject and get her mind off of James. "What are you making?" I asked, looking at the bowl. Her attention was once again back on the bowl in front of her and she smiled. I knew then that she had let it go at least for the time being.

"Your mom asked me to make sugar cookies for her class to decorate tomorrow," she replied. I was glad my mom was trying to include Bella and give her some freedom in the kitchen. I didn't think my mom disliked Bella. Actually it was quite the opposite. I think both my parents like having them around and my mom especially liked the female interaction since she didn't have daughters, but I think it was hard for my mom to get to know Bella because of me. I think she saw Bella as a distraction for me and that I was giving everything else in my life up for her. Which in a way I was, for a while everything was suffering. But now that she's safe and I don't have to worry all the time whether she's okay or not, I'm starting to fix all of that.

"Do you want some help?" I asked, willing to give her help but knowing I would probably just make things more difficult. She smiled and shook her head. Obviously she knew that my offer was ludicrous.

"Just watch the game with your brother and I'll make all of you some popcorn in a minute," she suggested. I nodded my head and headed towards the living room. I knew she would be in there by herself with nothing to do but stew over what Emmett had said and whatever else it is that has been bothering her all morning that she still hasn't revealed to me yet. I hated not knowing what was going on inside her head and what I could do to help her but I knew I had to be patient with her and keep her trust. It took me long enough to earn that trust and I wasn't going to do anything to jeopardize it now.

After a half hour of sitting on the couch with my brother and Seth attempting to pay attention to the game but not really succeeding at it, Bella came in carrying a bowl of popcorn and three sodas. She sat it down on the coffee table in front of us then took the chair across from the couch. I watched her as she took her school books out of her bag along with a notebook out of her backpack and placed them on her lap. She was mesmerizing to watch, the way her eyebrows furrowed when she read or how she tapped her pencil while she searched for the answer in the book. How she bit her bottom lip when she was frustrated and how she would flip her hair behind her shoulders ever so often revealing her bare shoulders and collar bone in her tank top. I watched her for a long time not paying attention to anything else around me until I felt Emmett's fist hit my shoulder.

"What the hell was that for?" I shouted, rubbing my arm.

"I've said your name at least a half a dozen times and you were ignoring me. That got your attention though, didn't it?" Emmett said laughing. "Maybe if I looked like Bella, you would pay attention to me more."

"If you looked like Bella, you would have all of my attention," I said in a sarcastic tone.

"Well if I looked like Bella, I'm not sure I'd want your attention. Seriously Bella, I don't know what you see in my brother," he said, looking towards Bella, who just smiled and blushed then went back to her books. "Do me a favor and go get me a beer out of the fridge in the garage."

"Whatever, I'm not your servant," I exclaimed.

"Yes, but you're the only one not paying attention to the game and I don't want to miss anything so go get me one," he demanded.

"I'm not getting you anything, you can get it yourself," I countered. During our little argument I hadn't noticed that Bella got up until she held the beer out to Emmett, offering it to him. She actually looked like a zombie doing as she was told without even thinking about it. Emmett and I stared at her with disbelief for a few seconds. I was sure he was seeing the same thing I was. He took the beer hesitantly from her then she went back and sat down in the chair continuing to do her homework. Emmett looked over at me puzzled by what happened but quickly changed course and went about watching the game and opening up his beer. I sat there thinking about what Emmett and I were doing and even though it was normal behavior for us and we didn't even notice that we were doing it, to her and probably even Seth it looked like we were fighting, so she did the only thing she knew how and broke it up by solving the problem. I was beginning to think my job of getting her to feel and act like a normal teenager was an impossible battle to win.

At half time, I was beginning to nod off just sitting there doing nothing so Emmett suggested that I take a nap. He was planning to stay until mom and dad got home so there was no reason for me to stay awake. I took his advice and got up walking over to Bella. She was done with her homework now, just reading a book so I put my hand out for her to take. "Let's take a nap, you look tired too," I suggested.

"Edward, I…," Emmett began.

"We're not going to do anything Emmett," I said cutting him off. "We're just going to talk and hopefully get some sleep. Besides you owe us a little privacy after tagging along last night."

"Don't let mom find out," he conceded.

I nodded my head and headed us both up stairs. I could have brought us down stairs to my room but I wanted to sleep in my bed and I thought she would be more comfortable up here anyway. We walked into what was her room now and I shut the door behind us. I walked us over to the bed and laid us down on the pillows. We faced each other just staring into each other's eyes silently. I began caressing her cheek with my fingers until she drifted off to sleep, I followed shortly after.

**LPOV**

I went shopping with Esme in Port Angeles and I was having so much fun. She was buying tons of Christmas presents for everyone and even let me pick out things for everyone too. She was so nice and caring. Never once did she ever treat me like I didn't belong. One lady even complimented on how nice it was to see mother and daughter shopping together these days because most teenagers prefer to shop with their friends instead. Esme smiled at her and thanked her for the compliment never attempting to try and explain that I wasn't really her daughter. I felt very proud that she considered me her daughter, even if I wasn't. I felt like I had a mother again but that scared me a little because my mothers were always taken from me eventually and I didn't want anything to happen to Esme.

She asked a few questions about Bella while we shopped, like if Bella had ever had a boyfriend in the past. Which the answer to that was no, at least none that I knew of and I would have known. Edward was the only boy she had ever allowed into her life. To be honest, none of us really let a lot of people get to know us fully and unfortunately because of that I didn't have a lot of friends. But the friends I did have were very supportive and nice to me when I went back to school after moving in with the Cullen's. Esme even suggested that we plan a sleepover so I could invite a few friends over. I never had a sleepover, I heard about them when the girls in my class would talk about them but I had never been to one or had one and I was really excited about it.

She also asked what we did when Edward would come over to our house those few weeks and I told her that we played games and Edward taught Seth how to play the guitar and once Seth would go to bed Bella and Edward would do their homework before he left for the night. I knew she was fishing for information about how serious things were during that time but honestly I don't think they got that close until after Edward saved us. She seemed pleased with that fact and I asked her if she didn't like Bella but she said that it wasn't that, she was only concerned for her son's wellbeing and wanted to be sure that they weren't moving too fast.

The Cullen's made us feel loved and safe and I liked that feeling. I did feel like they were being a little unfair to Bella and Edward with the way they kept an eye on them all the time and never let them be alone much, but I guess I kind of understood the concern considering that they were boyfriend and girlfriend now and living together.

They tried to hide the fact that James was still a threat to us but we all knew. And knowing my dad he would be back. He didn't let people get the better of him and I tried to hint to Esme every once in a while during our shopping trip that James would be after Edward, there was no doubt in my mind about that and I knew Bella knew it too. Last night, I heard her crying in her room and went to check on her. She explained that she just had a bad dream and it scared her a little bit. I didn't need her to tell me what the dream was about, I knew. I had been having similar nightmares of James coming back and I didn't like them. I spent a lot of time crying also.

"Esme," I asked. She hummed in response acknowledging me while we drove back towards home. "Bella's not going to hurt Edward, I promise. If anything she'll push him to fulfill his dreams and wants and not think about how it will affect her. That's how she is, how she's always been. That's why she took the blunt of the abuse from James. She did everything she could to prevent us from getting hurt even if it meant she got hurt in the process. She would do the same for Edward." I wanted her to like Bella, I wanted Bella to have a mother again, even if Esme wasn't our mother she was nice to me and Seth like a mother would be and I wanted that for Bella. She deserved it after everything she's gone through.

"I think I'm beginning to see that Leah. I understand why my son is so intrigued by her. And truthfully I wouldn't want anything less for my son. Bella is a wonderful girl who is very strong and giving even if she doesn't think she is. I just don't want them to move too fast and end up regretting anything in the future," she explained. "I only want the best for both of them and if that means being together then so be it, but I would like to see them do something with their lives before they make any serious plans. I've never seen my son this happy before, or care about something so ardently and I'm just afraid he's going to do something crazy without thinking it through first."

"Bella won't let him. She wants the same things as you. She wants him to be happy and she would never let him give up on something for her," I explained. It was the truth, Bella always put others first and would make sure he succeeded before anything else. "Besides, she has Edward wrapped around her finger and he'll do anything she tells him to do, and she'll do anything you tell her to do so you could use that to your advantage." She laughed loudly but still daintily.

"Well, aren't you quite the schemer?" She said. I smiled shyly. "Why don't we stop at the diner and get some dinner for everyone? I'm starving and I have no energy to cook anything tonight."

**SPOV**

I didn't understand why no one would let Bella and Edward be alone. They were always alone when Edward used to come over to our house every night. He was Bella's best friend. The rules here at the Cullen's house were different than what I was used to but they were much easier to follow and I didn't have to worry about getting in trouble if I broke a rule either. But I guess the rules for Bella were harder since she kept breaking them by being alone with Edward. Edward seemed to be mad that they were getting mad at Bella but she should know better than to break rules, even if dad is gone.

I liked it here and I never wanted to leave so I hoped Bella didn't ruin things for us. I had big brothers instead of sisters and they actually played with me and spent time with me. Emmett was teaching me about cars and football and Edward was still teaching me guitar and playing video games with me. Carlisle and Esme treated me like their real son and bought me all kinds of toys and games. Esme let me help her cook, which was something Bella never let me do since she was always worried that something would happen and dad would get mad. Carlisle was talking about taking me out in a few days to get a Christmas tree, I had never had a Christmas and I was so excited about it. I couldn't wait. I remember hearing all the kids in my class talking about what they got for Christmas every year and I always wanted to experience that too and now finally I was going to. I have never been so happy in all my life. I never wanted to see my real dad ever again. I hoped he was gone forever.

I sat on the couch with Emmett watching football, cheering when he did and taking a drink of my soda when he took a drink of his beer. Throwing my hands in the air or groaning when he did. He laughed at me a few times and reached over to ruffle my hair. I liked that he was spending time with me and not getting mad at me. Towards the end of the game, Carlisle walked through the door and laughed when he saw us sitting on the couch watching football with popcorn scattered all around. I didn't get what was so funny but I smiled at him when he came in.

"Where's your brother?" I heard Carlisle ask.

"He's upstairs taking a nap with Bella," Emmett replied, nonchalantly. Carlisle took a deep breath as he stared at Emmett.

"Relax dad, they're sleeping. I went and checked on them a little while ago and they were both sound asleep at least a foot apart from each other," I watched as Emmett explained and rolled his eyes. "And if you think Edward is still innocent and pure you are in complete denial." I had no clue what he was talking about but I listened anyway.

"I'm well aware of that son, but that doesn't mean Bella is as experienced and I don't want him to take advantage of that fact. She needs to deal with what happened all those years first," Carlisle said in return.

"Are you just blind or what?" Emmett said almost angry. "Dad he loves her, he wouldn't do anything to hurt her."

"I hope not," Carlisle said turning to walk away. Whatever it was they were talking about didn't sound good and I wonder if Bella was going to be in trouble for being upstairs with Edward. I hoped not but I had a feeling she was going to.

**BPOV**

_I was once again in the basement, but this time Edward was with me we were tied up together. James was coming I could hear his voice coming from upstairs, coming for us. I kept telling Edward I loved him over and over. I didn't know if he could hear me because he never responded but I kept telling him. I knew in my heart that James was going to kill us both. We had defied him and we would have to pay the price. I felt his presence standing above us. Then I heard him laughing, he untied us and left me lying on the floor while he took Edward away from me, he pulled him further and further away and no matter how much I tried I couldn't get to him…_

"No… No… Stop…,"

"Bella, baby wake up," I heard Edward's voice telling me to wake up, but I couldn't reach him. He was too far away. "Bella," he said again, shaking me out of my sleep. I woke with surprise, almost screaming. But when I saw Edward's face, I knew it was just another dream. I pulled myself to him and smothered my head in his chest, he put his arms around me holding on to me tightly to him while I cried.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked, softly. I shook my head vigorously not wanting to tell him that every one of my dreams lately, were all about him dying.

"Bella it might help to talk," he encouraged.

"You die… in every dream I have, you die and I can't save you," I confessed. I sniffled, and pulled away from him to look in his face. I expected to see hurt and anger but all I saw was compassion and love. "What kind of a girlfriend am I if every dream I have is of you dying."

He brushed the hair out of my face and smiled his crooked smile. "A girlfriend, who has dealt with too much in her life and is still haunted by the past; a girlfriend, that worries so much about something happening to me, that her mind is imagining every bad thing that could possibly happen and trying to figure out how to prevent it. But she doesn't realize yet that she doesn't have to carry around the guilt and pain of the past because it can't hurt her anymore.

"But what if he comes back Edward? He's going to come after you, he's going to blame you," I whimpered.

"We won't let that happen. Everyone is working together to keep all of us safe. There's nothing to worry about. I won't die, I promise, I'll always fight for you, no matter what happens," he insisted. I nodded my head trying to trust him. I leaned back into his chest and breathed in his scent of pine, musk, and sweat. It was an odd smell mixed together but I liked it. It was Edward.

"Is that what this morning was about?" He asked. I didn't respond he knew the answer was yes. He knew that I wasn't like that normally and that I was only trying to hold on to him to protect him. I thought that maybe if we went further in our relationship that I wouldn't be having these dreams any more. That somehow my mind would love him enough to not have such awful thoughts about him. Part of me wondered if letting him go would be the better option and safer for him, but it would be easier for James to get to him if he was alone. If I was with him and stayed with him when James came after him, I could sacrifice myself giving Edward a chance to get away. James could beat me and leave me for dead if he wanted but I wasn't going to let him get to Edward. I wouldn't let him hurt him or anyone else.

We laid there wrapped in each other's arms for a good hour just reveling in the closeness without interruptions or interference. Eventually we heard Carlisle talking down stairs and Edward suggested we get up and go down before we get in trouble. He was right but I didn't want to leave. I reluctantly pulled myself off the bed and followed Edward downstairs. Everyone was there watching us as we came down. I felt nervous that we would be in trouble but they just called us into the dining room and started passing us food like it was no big deal that Edward and I were upstairs lying in bed together. Nothing had happened and there was more that happened that morning in his bed than there was that happened in my bed but I still expected to get stern words or concerned looks but there was nothing. I wondered if maybe they were easing up on us a little and not trying to keep us apart. But I didn't want to get my hopes up for that.

The rest of the week went by rather quickly, I was still having nightmares almost every night, but each time it was different and each time I couldn't get to him. When I would wake up it would take me a minute to remember that it was just a dream and remember Edward's words that it was only my imagination and not to feel guilty about it. But I did regardless. Since that day in Edward's bedroom, he barely touched me. He would hold my hand or hug me on occasion but his kisses were chaste and sometimes not even that. I knew he was mad at me and probably scared of me for having those dreams even if he didn't let on that he was.

I went to my first counseling session on Tuesday and it went okay I guess. She wanted to know how I was adjusting with the Cullen's, whether I felt safe there. She asked how I was doing in school and whether or not I was having any anxiety about James still being on the loose. Mostly she just asked questions and waited for me to answer and open up to her. I wanted to talk to her about the dreams but I was afraid she would think I was being ridiculous or that I was a horrible person for thinking up such morbid things. I also wanted to talk to her about what was going on with Edward but I thought that should be between us and not a third party. I tried to be as vague as I possibly could with my answers hoping she would except that and not push me further. I wasn't ready to open up with anyone about what I was feeling or how all of this was affecting me. She suggested that I do something for myself, that I was never allowed to do before, but I didn't have any idea what that could be. She suggested the same thing to both Leah and Seth as well and Leah knew exactly what she wanted to do. She wanted to take dance lessons. Something she dreamed about doing since she was little and used to pretend that she was some great dancer and dance all through the house when James wasn't around. Esme was happy to help her get set up with a local dance studio to take lessons from. Seth wanted to play a sport. He was definitely taking that role on because of his new big brother's which he took to calling them now. So he talked to Esme about it and she got him signed up for Basketball which was about over with this season but it was a start. I on the other hand didn't have any big ambitions or wants in life so I didn't know what to do. I thought about it a lot and asked Edward for some advice but he said it was something I needed to do on my own.

On the weekend, we all went out to pick out a Christmas tree and brought it home to decorate. Carlisle brought in a huge bin of all kinds of ornaments and trimmings and I had so much fun watching everyone try to put every last ornament on the tree. Seth's face lit up with excitement and joy when we turned on the lights and saw the completed tree. I could tell that both he and Leah were happy here and I wanted them to be happy. I hoped that the Cullen's would let them stay even when I moved out because they could make them a lot happier and give them a better life then I ever could.

On Sunday, Alice thought we needed to go shopping together so Jasper and Edward tagged along, as well as Emmett but he was in disguise. We got up early that morning and headed for Seattle since according to Alice it was the only respectable place to shop for Christmas. I had only been to Seattle when I was really young and all I remembered about it was how big it was. The Ferry ride was fun but I wasn't paying much attention to what was going on. I was still trying to figure out what I needed to do for myself so Dr. Weber would be happy with my choice. I didn't want to disappoint her or make her think I wasn't willing to do as she wanted.

Once we arrived at the mall in Seattle, Alice went crazy, grabbing stuff left and right barely paying attention to what it was or how much it cost. Occasionally Jasper or Emmett would grab something or go into a store Alice had no interest in but she followed along.

Edward kept asking me if I wanted to buy anything but I didn't have any money and I didn't feel right about Edward paying for stuff. Then it hit me, I could get a part time job. I could make my own money and be able buy everyone I cared about a present and be able to save any money I made for the future. Just in case living with the Cullen's didn't last forever. It was the perfect idea.

That night after we got home I decided to take a chance and ask if it would be okay. I waited until we were all sitting at the table eating dinner before I brought it up. I didn't think it would be that big of a deal to have a part time job but it did mean that Emmett or one of the other police officers would be working harder to keep an eye on me. It made me feel bad that they had to watch me and work overtime so much in the first place. But I was thankful they did.

"I'm thinking of getting a part time job," I said quietly. I was hoping that no one would hear me but everyone did and turned to stare at me.

"Why do you want a job?" Edward asked.

"I'd just like to be able to provide for myself and not have to depend on anyone else," I said shyly.

"Bella, there's no need for you to provide for yourself," Esme said. "We're happy to have you here and you're welcome to stay as long as you like."

"I know, and I appreciate your kindness to all of us, but I can't stay here forever. Dr. Weber suggested that I do something for me that I was never able to do before and this is what I want to do." I explained.

"I think it's an excellent idea," Carlisle announced. "I can look around and see what I can find to help you out."

"Thank you, Dr. Cullen," I said. Edward gave me a puzzled look but quickly went back to eating while pushing whatever it was he was contemplating behind him.

A few days later Carlisle called Edward from the hospital and asked if he could bring me by after school. I figured it was a follow-up appointment to make sure I was healing correctly. But instead he made Edward wait in the waiting room and then brought me down to the kitchen to meet the head chef in the cafeteria. Carlisle explained that they needed more staff so he thought this might be the perfect place for me. It was a safe place that James wouldn't dare try to get to me and it was a job I could do well but get paid for it at the same time. I was overjoyed that Carlisle had done this for me. Carlisle left me with the chef and he explained what my duties would be and what my schedule would look like. After he was done, I ran to the elevator, I couldn't wait to tell Edward. Once I saw him waiting by the doors looking kind of nervous I ran to him and threw myself in his arms, squealing with excitement. He was surprised and almost fell backwards but caught himself against the wall and laughed.

"Guess what your dad did?" I asked, almost too excited to speak.

"I don't know… what?"

"He got me a job working in the cafeteria, I get to help prepare the meal trays for the patients and then help clean up afterwards and I get paid for it," I explained. His face fell but he tried to hide it by giving me a smile.

"That's great Bella, I'm really happy for you."

"What's wrong?" I asked, feeling my excitement fall.

"Nothing, I'm glad everything is working out," he added.

"Edward, why don't you seem very happy, did I do something wrong?" I asked.

He rolled his eyes at me and chuckled. "No, you didn't do anything wrong, I'm just feeling slightly jealous," he admitted.

"Jealous of what, did you want a job too?" I wondered.

"No," he laughed. "You're just going to be gone a lot more now and I won't see you as much. I know it's stupid but I'll miss having you around."

I laughed at him for even thinking something so ridiculous. "I'm actually surprised that you aren't already sick of me."

He pulled me into a hug and buried his face in my neck. "I could never be sick of you, I can't ever get enough of you," he whispered. I smiled at his words. He always had a way of making me feel good.

"Let's go home and spend some time together, since we won't get to for very much longer," he suggested. He took my hand in his, linking our fingers together and led me out to his car.

The next day, I started at my job and I loved it, I liked the people I was working with and I liked being able to do something that was worthwhile and I was good at. I understood now why Dr. Weber wanted me to do this. I felt good about myself for once in my life, I felt needed and like I was doing something important. I worked every night from 4pm to 7pm and then on Saturday from 9am to 5:30pm. Every day Edward would drop me off and Carlisle would bring me home when he got off work or if he had to stay late, Edward would come back for me. Chef, as he preferred to be called, even though his name was Marcus, said that if I was up to it, during the winter break weeks, I could work more hours and I quickly took him up on the offer. I knew I would get my first pay check a couple days before Christmas Eve so I opted to have Christmas Eve off in exchange for working a few hours on Christmas Day. I figured that I could do Christmas shopping on Christmas Eve and I would still be around to watch everyone open presents and then be back in time for Christmas dinner that Esme was planning.

The week before Christmas we had a family counseling session with Dr. Weber and usually that would be for me, Seth, and Leah, but Dr. Weber thought it would be good for everyone to attend. So Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, and Edward attended. I was extremely nervous having them here. I didn't know what Dr. Weber was going to tell them or what Carlisle and Esme would tell her. I knew Edward could tell I was nervous because he kept rubbing his hand soothingly over mine.

"I'm so glad you could all attend," Dr. Weber began. "I'd like to begin by asking how things are going with everyone at the house."

"I think things are going well," Esme replied. "Everyone is very considerate and respectful. We haven't had any major problems."

"That's good, Seth how do you feel about the Cullen's?" She asked.

"I love it, everyone is so nice and I have lots of toys and brothers to play with me," he answered. We all laughed lightly. I assumed Dr. Weber understood what he was talking about because she laughed along with the rest of us.

"And Leah, how do feel like things are going?"

"I like living with the Cullen's, they treat me nice and I never have to feel scared anymore," she explained.

Dr. Weber wrote some notes on a pad of paper as she talked. "And what about you Bella, how do you feel about the Cullen's?"

I took a deep breath to calm myself. "I think things are going well, they are all so helpful and caring towards all of us. Carlisle helped me get a job."

"And how are you feeling about working at the hospital?" She asked.

"I like it a lot, I like what I do and the people I work with," I answered with a smile.

"That's good," she said smiling at me. "I'm glad you like it. Now I'd like to begin by asking all of you," she began, directing her question to the Cullen's. "If there is anything you notice at home or at school that you think should be addressed or anything you would like to share."

Carlisle and Esme looked back and forth between each other deciding what they should say. Emmett spoke up first. "I like having a kid brother, and it's not so bad having sisters either."

"What am I chop liver?" Edward retorted.

"Seth's cooler than you ever were," Emmett returned. "You were always so whiney and needy. Seth is fun and does whatever I tell him to do, unlike you." Edward rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest. "I do think Seth needs a lot of male stimulation though. He needs that father/brother figure."

"I agree, I think Seth needs good male role models in his life, as well as Leah and Bella do," Carlisle added.

"And do you feel like he's been getting that special attention?" Everyone laughed and nodded their heads. Seth turned red and looked around bashful.

We went on like this for a while discussing how we were adjusting and how we were doing in school, Edward didn't say much, neither did I. Most of their discussions were about Seth and Leah which in a way I was happy about because I didn't like talking about myself but I think it was more to the fact that none of them really took the time to get to know me and I didn't spend much time with them to give them a chance to.

"Is there anything else anyone would like to share?" She asked. Everyone was quiet and looked around between each other wondering if anyone else was going to speak.

"I do," Edward said quietly. My heart started racing when he spoke. I didn't want him to say anything about me. I looked at him with panicked eyes, begging him not to. He glanced at me once looking apologetic then sat up to speak clearly.

"Go ahead Edward," Dr. Weber encouraged.

"I've noticed that Bella still has this need to please everyone. She feels like she has to do everything in her power to keep the people she cares about happy so they won't be mad at her or won't leave her, even if she's sacrificing her own wants or needs to make them happy. She still has a lot of fear and anxiety because of James. She doesn't like revealing anything to anyone, she still holds a lot in. She has a hard time trusting people. She has a lot of guilt because our whole town is scared and on edge. She's taking all the blame for everything that's happened and sometimes I wonder if maybe she would have rather suffered the abuse from James, than be free from him now." He finally stopped and looked up at Dr. Weber waiting for her to say something. I glared at the back of his head and felt the tears stinging my eyes. I couldn't believe he was doing this. Dr. Weber nodded her head in understanding and wrote a few things down in her notebook.

"Bella how are you feeling right now?" She asked. I looked up at her and noticed everyone's eyes on me except for Edward's. He was staring at the floor.

"Betrayed, hurt, angry…," I said, through tears. "How could you do this Edward?" He finally turned towards me. "I trusted you."

"I'm sorry Bella, but I can't sit by and watch you suffer anymore, I want you to get better and you aren't going to if you hold all of this in," he said through a shaky voice. "I'm not keeping secret's anymore for you. I did that once and it almost killed you, I'm not doing again."

I got up and walked towards the window not wanting to look at any of their faces right now. "I'm glad you're choosing not to keep secrets Edward, this is really helpful and I hope you continue to share. You're doing the right thing and I know this is hard for you as well as her but it's a good thing," I heard Dr. Weber say. "Is there anything else you would like to share?"

He hesitated for a few seconds, I wondered if he was going to tell her about my dreams. That was going to be the test. If he kept that in I could forgive everything else, but if he revealed my dreams then I didn't know if I could ever trust him again. I heard him take a deep breath before he began. "She's also been having dreams, more like nightmares," he started. My heart sunk and the tears began running down my cheeks.

"Would you care to talk about these dreams you're having Bella?" Dr. Weber asked. I shook my head hoping that maybe she wouldn't press the subject and Edward wouldn't reveal any more.

"They're about me dying," Edward offered. "She told me that she has a different dream almost every night where James comes back and tries to kill me or does kill me and she can't stop him or get to me in time to save me."

"This is good Edward. Don't be afraid to talk about this," Dr. Weber said.

I turned quickly to look back towards them. "How can this be a good thing? How can everyone knowing that I'm screwed up be a good thing?" I shouted. "So, now you all know, I have dreams of your son dead every night. I'm sure you all think I'm a disgusting, horrible person for even thinking up something like this." I couldn't see anyone's faces through my tears but I knew they were all staring at me. I looked towards Edward and wiped my eyes so I could see his face. I wanted to know he was hurting. I wanted him to feel bad for what he did. "Why did you do this to me Edward? Why are you betraying my trust? You were supposed to be the one person I could depend on and now I just hate you." His face fell instantly and I saw his breath catch. He looked pained, and sad. He had tears welling up in his eyes.

He finally let out the breath he was holding in. "If that's the sacrifice I have to make, to help you get better than I guess you can hate me," he whimpered. "I'm really sorry but I want you to get better. He's still controlling you even though he's not here and I want you to be free of him for your wellbeing, not for me." I continued glaring at him fuming at his betrayal. Deep down I knew he was right but I was angry that he didn't tell me he was going to say anything, or talk to me about this himself. "I can't help you this time Bella, I wish I could but I can't. You have to do this on your own, for you."

"Edward," Dr. Weber interrupted. "Thank you for caring so much about Bella and revealing this information to me, I know it wasn't easy for you and I'm sure it's going to continue to be hard to tell me things but I don't want there to be any more secrets between anyone anymore. It all needs to be out in the open in this room. And I'd like to add that you are a very smart young man and you are very right in everything you said. You can't save her this time. You can be there for her and support her but you can't save her from everything. Now if you don't mind, I'd like to take the last few minutes of our session to talk to Bella in private." Everyone got up and headed for the door, Edward was the last to leave and before he walked out completely, he glanced back at me mouthing the word 'sorry'. I turned away from him and looked back out the window.

"Bella, why don't you have a seat," she suggested. I walked over and plopped down in the chair, still feeling anger. "I'd say you had a major breakthrough today. I think the anger you feel towards Edward right now is a good thing. It shows me that you are able to get mad at someone for hurting you and tell them how mad you are. You didn't hold in your anger, you let it out and hurt the person that hurt you in return. I'm not saying that what Edward did is wrong, because what he did took a lot of guts. I think he knew you were going to be angry with him but he cares about you so much that he took that risk. Now I'd like to discuss these dreams you've been having. Do you have them every night?"

I sighed heavily, giving up. "For the most part, yes," I answered. "But they change, it's always a different scenario, a different place, or way how it happens, but the end result is always the same. Edward dies and I can't save him. I know that makes me a bad person and I'm sure the Cullen's all hate me now. That's why I didn't want to talk about it."

"When you told Edward about the dreams, did he hate you?" She asked.

"No, he was understanding and tried to let me know that it wasn't anything I should be ashamed of and that it was only my fear in the dreams not me actually wanting him dead," I clarified.

"Do you think he's right?" She asked. I shrugged my shoulders, I knew he was probably right but I was mad at him and I didn't want to give him the satisfaction of being right. 'Do you want to know what I think your dreams mean?" She questioned. I nodded my head. I wanted her to tell me that it was normal and that I wasn't crazy and that I didn't really want him dead and that there was a way to get rid of the dreams. "I think you are scared of James coming back to hurt you. But you know that any amount of abuse he could do to you would never be as bad as him taking someone you truly care about away from you. I think you have a fear of being powerless to prevent him from hurting you or anyone else. It's not what happens in the dreams or who it happens to, it's the fear you still have inside. You feel inferior to James and most likely always will but you can learn to protect yourself and feel a sense of empowerment in your own surroundings. I think since you chose not to talk about these dreams you are feeling a sense of guilt. Which it sounds like you are taking on a lot of guilt that doesn't belong to you, it's not your fault that people are scared, it's not your fault that Edward and his family are in danger, it's not your fault that James is still on the loose, it's not your fault that everyone is questioning everything they know, and it definitely is not your fault that you are having dreams of Edward dying." I took a deep breath trying to take everything she was saying in. "You need to keep telling yourself that."

"I guess you think I should apologize to Edward now, right?" I asked.

"I'm not going to tell you to do anything. You need to make that choice for yourself, if you think he deserves your forgiveness than work that out with him, but I'm not going to tell you what I think because it's not my choice to make," she said, getting up from her chair and heading over to her desk. "I'd like you to take a look at some of these classes that are offered here at the hospital and see if one of them interests you." She handed me a pamphlet with a list of self-defense classes offered. I think you could probably find one that will work around your schedule and I would suggest Leah take it as well, maybe even Esme. It might be a good bonding experience for all of you. I get the impression you and Esme don't have that close of a relationship as she might with Seth and Leah."

"I don't think she likes me much because of Edward's and my relationship," I remarked.

"I think she's just a mother who's afraid of her son getting hurt, like any mother would," she explained. "I'd like to see you again in a week and I'd like to maybe discuss your relationships with the people around you on a daily basis, try and get a sense of how they make you feel and what type of closeness you have with them."

"Alright," I said, getting up off the couch in her office and heading for the door.

"And Bella," she called once I reached the door. "I'm glad you started working, it's showing me that you are willing to try and do things for yourself instead for everyone else. Thanks for opening up to me today and I hope you will continue to share with me what you're feeling. It makes my job a lot easier." I smiled at her and walked out of the door where Esme, Carlisle, Seth, and Leah waited for me. Emmett was gone and so was Edward. I had hurt him once again so he left, and Emmett probably chased after him to keep him safe.


	16. Chapter 15

Like I said this chapter would be up in just a couple days. Thank you bzeemomof4 and redlulu for getting to it so quickly. I heart you both. This is my lemons chapter if you would call it that. I don't think it's too bad, at least not compared to some stories I've read but this is my first time so please go easy on me. And if you don't want to read it or are too young to read it please skip by that section. It isn't the entire chapter only a little at the end so please read through everything else. As for a few questions I've had. Someone asked who was older and since they are both 18 and Bella's birthday is in September and Edwards is in June that would make Edward older by a few months. Also someone asked to follow me on twitter so my user name on twitter is graffiti4 if anyone is interested. But I have to warn you I don't normally post anything that exciting, it's mainly just casual banter back and forth between some good friends. With Christmas coming up and my kids being home for winter break every day, I'm not sure if I will be able to get another chapter done until the next year but I'll try. I am working on a Christmas one shot but I'm not sure if I will post it. I'll let my beta's decide if it's good enough first.

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters.

* * *

**Insatiable: Darren Hayes **

When moonlight crawls along the street  
Chasing away the summer heat  
Footsteps outside somewhere below  
The world revolves I let it go  
We build our church above this street  
We practice love between these sheets  
The candy sweetness scent of you  
It bathes my skin I'm stained by you  
And all I have to do is hold you  
There's a racing in my heart  
I am barely touching you

Turn the lights down low  
Take it off  
Let me show  
My love for you  
Insatiable  
Turn me on  
Never stop  
Wanna taste every drop  
My love for you  
Insatiable

The moonlight plays upon your skin  
A kiss that lingers takes me in  
I fall asleep inside of you  
There are no words  
There's only truth  
Breathe in Breathe out  
There is no sound  
We move together up and down  
We levitate our bodies soar  
Our feet don't even touch the floor  
And nobody knows you like I do  
The world doesn't understand  
But I grow stronger in your hands

Turn the lights down low  
Take it off  
Let me show  
My love for you  
Insatiable  
Turn me on  
Never stop  
Wanna taste every drop  
My love for you  
Insatiable

Turn the lights down low  
Take it off  
Let me show  
My love for you  
Insatiable  
Turn me on  
Never stop  
Wanna taste every drop  
My love for you  
Insatiable

We never sleep we're always holdin' hands  
Kissin' for hours talkin' makin' plans  
I feel like a better man  
Just being in the same room  
We never sleep there's just so much to do  
Too much to say  
Can't close my eyes when I'm with you  
Insatiable the way I'm loving you

Turn the lights down low  
Take it off  
Let me show  
My love for you  
Insatiable  
Turn me on  
Never stop  
Wanna taste every drop  
My love for you  
Insatiable

Turn the lights down low  
Take it off  
Let me show  
My love for you  
Insatiable  
Turn me on  
Never stop  
Wanna taste every drop  
My love for you  
Insatiable

**EPOV**

I knew she was going to be mad at me. I contemplated all day on whether or not to bring up my observations with the counselor. I asked her a few times how counseling was going and what she talked about and every time she would say "it's going fine" or "I'm talking about what happened." I didn't believe her, she was easy for me to read and I could tell she was hiding something. I wanted her to get better. I needed her to get better and that wasn't going to happen if she didn't deal with the fear and hurt and anger she had towards James. So while we sat in that room discussing how everyone was adjusting and getting along, I was a nervous wreck knowing what I was going to have to do. I waited to see if anyone else had made the same observations I had and would let me off the hook from bringing them up first but it didn't go noticed and not one person in the room discussed Bella. I knew why, because she never let anyone get close enough to know her so no one knew what was going on inside of her, except for me.

When I finally spoke up and her eyes shot to mine with fear and anxiety I almost changed my mind but everyone was waiting for me to say something so I couldn't stop now. I sat up trying to avoid her eyes, I didn't want to see the hurt and distrust in her eyes that I knew was there. Originally I thought I would need to earn her trust and hold on to it so she would open up to me more, but I was realizing that there wasn't anything I could do for her anymore. She needed to do this on her own. So I told the counselor what I had been noticing over the last few weeks and what I thought Bella was feeling. I knew the minute I talked about the dreams there was no going back for us. I knew it was a huge thing that she needed to deal with and if she wasn't going to bring it up then someone had to. I knew she was going to hate me for it but to hear her actually say the words was like someone stabbing me in the heart. I had never felt that type of pain before and I instantly felt guilty about what I did. I wanted to take it back, I wanted to try to make it better but I knew I couldn't.

Once Dr. Weber told us to leave I looked back at her once more, seeing the anger in her eyes, I wanted to get out of there as fast as I could. I bolted for the elevator ignoring the calls from my family to wait. I ran to my car holding back tears. I couldn't cry over this, I couldn't let it get to me. How stupid would I be if I cried over something like a girl I cared about telling me she hated me? I sped home and as soon as I parked my car, I took off on a run through the woods. I just needed to get away and not think about anything. I needed time to be by myself.

For whatever reason, my run led me down the same paths I always took to get to Bella's house. When I came up behind it I slowed down looking around for something. I didn't know what though. Maybe I was expecting to see James there or maybe I was hoping everything that had happened the last few weeks was just a dream and I was going to climb up that tree to her room and she would still be there waiting for me. I went inside the house even though I knew I shouldn't and looked around. It was cold, dark, it felt eerily ghost like. I looked around and went into each room trying to imagine all the pain that was caused in this house. When I walked into what was James' room and saw how different his room looked compared to the kids' rooms my anger sparked. He had paintings on his walls, all kinds of gadgets and a nice big TV mounted on his wall with a huge stereo system in the corner. He had all this while his kids had hardly anything. How could someone be so mean and hurtful to someone so innocent? Where would someone learn to be this way? I wanted him to hurt, I wanted him to feel the type of pain he inflicted on them and was still causing on them now even though he was gone. I picked up a baseball bat I saw in the corner fully intending to bust everything in sight and let out some of my anger, but right as I was about to swing, something shiny caught my eye in the closet. I put the bat down for a minute and walked towards the closet grabbing the shiny thing that caught my eye out of a box sitting on the floor. It was a picture of Bella when she was probably around 3 with a woman who most likely was her mother. I pulled the box out into the room and sat down on the ground looking through every picture and photo album in there. There were lots of pictures of Bella and her mom, a few of all of them together, some of when Seth was first born. There was even a whole photo album of Leah with a woman who I imagined must be her real mom. Looking through the pictures made me even madder but they made me sad too, so much was taken from them. They had suffered tremendously, more than anyone should ever have to. I allowed myself to let a few tears out knowing that I was alone and no one would ever know. After looking at the pictures for a long time and not realizing it was getting dark I put the box back in the closet and left the house and started walking back through the woods slowly. I didn't know what to expect when I got home. Would Bella even talk to me or let me talk to her? Would we ever be able to get past this? Truthfully, I didn't want to go home to find out.

**BPOV**

I felt horrible about what I said to Edward, I knew I hurt him and I didn't know why I had. I didn't know how I could be so mean to someone else. I wasn't that type of person; I didn't want to be a mean hurtful person. We drove home in complete silence, I was sure everyone was mad at me. I was sure they thought I was a horrible person for dreaming that their son was dead. I wouldn't be surprised if they asked me to leave and never come near their family ever again. We stopped and got some dinner at the diner and then stopped at the grocery store since Esme said we were out of milk and eggs. I knew that they were trying to give Edward space to think, after what I did to him. He probably never wanted to speak to me ever again.

When we walked into the house shortly after dark, I wanted to run to my room and hide, and never come out to face what I had done. But we were all stopped by Emmett in the doorway, who was worried and said he couldn't find Edward anywhere. His car was here but he was gone. He explained that he figured he went for a run in the woods like he normally did when he was upset about something but he had been gone for a long time and was starting to get worried. My only thought was of that first dream I had when he was dead in the woods. I didn't have time to think, I just ran. I ran towards the trees and went farther and farther into darkness. It was so dark I couldn't see anything. I kept yelling his name hoping he would answer but he didn't. I wasn't even sure if I could find my way out of the trees to get home and I was scared. I started crying and not paying attention to where I was going until I ran into something hard but soft. I fell backwards and hit a stump that hurt my butt. I reached around and started rubbing the pain away. I wiped my tears to look at what it was I ran into and was surprised when I saw Edward's face staring down at me in disbelief.

"Bella, what are you doing out here?" He asked.

My breath caught and I jumped to my feet wrapping my arms around his neck, probably squeezing too hard but I didn't care. "I was so worried about you. I was sure something horrible happened," I said, breathlessly. He slowly put his arms around my waist. I think he wasn't sure if it was okay to touch me, but he did it anyway. I molded my body to his telling him with my actions that it was okay. He pulled me closer, holding me tighter and leaning into my shoulder.

"I'm so sorry Bella, I never meant to hurt you, I just want you to get better," he said.

"I know, it's okay, I don't blame you for what you did," I replied.

"You said you hated me."

"I didn't mean it. Edward I could never hate you, I love you too much. I was just mad and it came out without thinking," I explained. I pulled away slightly to see his face. I could tell he had been crying and it hurt to know I had caused the pain that made him cry. I rubbed my fingers under his eyes and he closed them leaning into my hand. "I'm sorry for everything, for saying that I hated you, for getting mad at you, for dreaming of you dead." I said the last part quietly. I didn't want to bring it up but I knew he was mad at me for it. That's why he's been so distant with me lately. He's probably scared of me.

"Bella, I don't care about the dreams. They don't mean anything except you have a fear of something happening and that you feel powerless to do anything to stop it. That's why I told Dr. Weber today, because I need you to understand that you can do something, you can be in control of this. Think about it Bella, he took off at the first sign that things weren't going the way he planned. He's more scared than you are, you hold all the power and he can't hurt you unless you allow him to. Don't let him hurt you anymore. Talk about what happened and what you're feeling and deal with it. He wants you to hold it all in and keep it a secret and dwell on it for the rest of your life. Fight back Bella; don't let him have the power anymore." His words were the most powerful and meaningful words I had ever heard. He was right; I was letting James have the power. I think that's what Dr. Weber was trying to tell me today too. I made a silent promise to both Edward and myself that from this day forward I was fighting back.

"Come on, let's go home," Edward said. He pulled away and held out his hand for mine. I linked our fingers together and followed him out of the woods.

"Edward, can you do me a favor?" I asked, as we walked.

"What's that?"

"Will you stay out of the woods?" He stopped and looked at me strangely.

"Why, don't you want me in the woods?" He asked.

"Because you're alone and James could get to you out here," I replied. He smiled, and pulled me to him, kissing me tenderly.

He held my face in his hands gently and looked deep into my eyes. "I'll make you that promise if you make me one in return." I thought he was going to ask me to open up with Dr. Weber or to fight back like he suggested, which I would have agreed to since I had already promised myself that I would but that's not what he asked. "I want you to stop thinking about everyone else and think about yourself. I know you took this job so you could have money for Christmas and so you can help support your brother and sister. But I want you to promise me that whatever money you make at your job, aside from what you plan to use for Christmas because I know you will regardless of what I say, you buy yourself something with anything you make after that. Something frivolous or spontaneous, that's for you."

"You want me to promise to buy myself something?" I asked in disbelief. 'What happened to wanting to save money for the future like your parent's always talk about doing?"

"It doesn't have to be anything big or expensive, just something you have always wanted and never had," he encouraged.

I took a deep breath and nodded my head in agreement. He smiled and leaned in to kiss me once more, this time it was different than it was earlier. There was passion, need, lust… everything there was like before I told him about the dreams. I thought the reason he was pulling away from me was because he was freaked out by what my dreams, but now I wasn't so sure.

We walked hand in hand back to the house and I was actually very impressed that even in the dark he knew exactly where we were and how to get back. But then I remembered that he had been doing this for a while when he was coming over to my house every night. When we walked in the house everyone came running to us with gasps and sighs and pulled us both into hugs. I expected Edward to let go of my hand but he never did which made it awkward to hug anyone back but we managed. After everyone was done with the warm welcome then came the lecture of not running off like that ever again and letting someone know where we were at all times and to stay out of the woods because it was too dangerous. The whole time we sat on the couch listening to them tell us all the things we weren't supposed to do and telling us how worried and scared they were, made me realize that this is what a real family is supposed to be like. They care about each other and protect each other, they get mad and angry but they don't hurt each other with their anger. This is what I should have had growing up, but I was glad I had it now.

After they were done talking I got up off the couch and walked to Esme and hugged her tightly. She was rigid at first but eventually put her arms around me and hugged me back. "Thank you for being such a great mother." I could feel her smile and hold me closer.

"Why don't you get some sleep dear?" Esme suggested. "You have had an emotionally draining day. I think we all have." I pulled away and nodded my head before walking up the stairs.

I put on some pajamas and laid in bed reading when there was a light rapping on the door. I sat up telling whoever it was that they could come in. I assumed it was Edward who snuck up to tell me goodnight but I was surprised when I saw that it was Emmett. I was nervous at first, Emmett and I never really talked to each other. I looked around trying to figure out what I should say or whether I should offer to let him sit down on the bed or if I should say anything at all.

"Wow, Edward sure changed things up here didn't he?" He commented. I could tell he was nervous as well, but I didn't know why. He walked in and shut the door leaning up against it. "I wanted to thank you for finding him and bringing him back, I know that must have been scary for you." I nodded my head. "I wanted to tell you that no one blames you or thinks differently of you because of what was revealed today, especially not Edward. He loves you unconditionally, I can see it and I've seen it for a long time. I know my brother pretty well and he would never think anything bad of you, he would always try to make it better even if he was not successful at his attempts." I listened quietly not wanting to interrupt him. "I also wanted to tell you that I would never let anything happen to my brother so if you're afraid of something happening that you can't save him from, I will. I won't let James hurt him or anyone else for that matter."

"Thank you," I said, not sure what else I could say.

"And I want to apologize for not seeing who James really was sooner. I should have picked up on the signs. I should have known. It's my job to pick up on things like that and I ignored the signs. I keep going over everything I saw, everything Edward was revealing in code and I should have known. I shouldn't have teased him about it and made jokes. I should have taken it seriously, and I'm sorry for that. If I had, I would have been able to save you and James wouldn't have had the opportunity to get away. Then there would be no reason for anyone to be scared. And you wouldn't be having these dreams."

"Shouldn't you be telling Edward this?" I questioned. It sounded like more of an apology to Edward for not believing him than anything he should be saying to me.

"I have, and I probably will continue to, but I think you needed to hear it too." He said. "Anyway, I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am that I wasn't doing my job and wasn't there to help you when I should have been."

"None of this is your fault, Emmett," I proclaimed.

"And none of this is your fault either," he affirmed. I ducked my head realizing what he was doing. He was trying to make me understand that we both took a lot of the blame on ourselves but neither one of us were at fault for any of it. I nodded my head in understanding. He nodded his head once and walked out the door. I spent most of the night contemplating everything that happened that day and didn't sleep much at all.

The rest of the weeks following up to Christmas were uneventful, I went to school, went to work, did homework with Edward, spent time with my new family, went to counseling, and started a self-defense class with Esme. I had to admit, Esme and I were getting to know each other better during this experience and I actually liked her a lot and I think she liked me too.

I was still having the dreams but not as often and since I found him in the woods that night and I was discussing the dreams with Dr. Weber more, it seemed to me that I was getting closer to Edward each time. Almost there in time to save him, and I was elated in that fact. Dr. Weber explained that my dreams were much like a metaphor of my life, how I never felt like I could do anything to prevent or stop what was happening but now I was learning how to stop it. I was learning how to move on from the past and know I wasn't in danger anymore.

Esme was coming to terms with Edward's and my relationship also and she was giving us a little more freedom. It wasn't a lot but she would let us have some time alone and not check up on us all the time. I tried to push Edward to be as open as he used to be with me when we were alone. But now the most he would do was kiss me and occasionally he would kiss my neck but his hands never ventured too far and we always stayed completely dressed. It wasn't about making our relationship more so I wouldn't have the dreams, I knew that wouldn't happen. It wasn't about wanting to make him happy or wanting to live up to everyone else. It wasn't about fear that he wouldn't want me if we weren't intimate. It was just me wanting him and needing him. I didn't know if that was right or not but it's what I wanted. I didn't really plan to go all the way with him since his parents had a rule against it and I was not planning to break one of their rules but they never said anything about exploring as Edward put it. He never gave in though and would always pull away if I tried to push any farther. It was very frustrating.

On Christmas Eve, I asked Alice to go shopping with me because I knew she would be the best person to take since shopping was not my expertise and I wanted to get everyone something really nice to show how much I appreciated all of them. I knew Edward would be no help in that department. He would just tell me to get everyone a game or movie and call it good. I wanted it to mean more than that. Alice helped me out quite a bit and I think I did a really good job getting everyone a gift. I even made sure to get something for Sam and Garrett for working all the overtime to keep us all safe and for Chef for teaching me so much and being a good friend.

Edward was not happy about me volunteering to work on Christmas day and made a big deal out it in front of his family which made me mad and almost made me rethink the gift I got him, but later that night when everyone was asleep and it was officially Christmas day, he snuck upstairs and apologized for being so angry over something so ridiculous. I forgave him of course but I was still nervous about the gift I was giving him. Alice said it would be perfect but I wasn't so sure.

"I actually have two gifts for you," he explained after I forgave him. "One you'll get tomorrow and it's kind of from both me and Emmett, since he helped me get it. But this one is from me and it's probably really stupid but whatever, I want to give it to you now." He thrust a small rectangular wrapped box at me. I could tell it was wrapped professionally at one of those gift wrapping stations they have in the mall. He huffed and ran his hands through his hair nervously. I laughed at him for looking so nervous, and he rolled his eyes. "Just open it."

I undid the tape on the bottom of the box and pulled the paper off. I felt weird about getting a gift. No one had given me a gift in years and I wasn't sure how I was supposed to react. Should I act surprised, should I act happy, should I be emotional? I peeked up at him before I took the lid off the box and he was watching my hands intently waiting for me to open it. I looked back down at the box and pulled the lid off. Inside was a silver, heart shaped, locket with a butterfly and two small flowers on the front. My breath caught in my chest and a lump formed in my throat. It was beautiful and I didn't know what to say.

"Its white gold and the butterfly and flowers are engraved and then painted on. At least that's what the sales person said. I know you like butterfly's so I thought it was perfect," he explained. "There's a picture inside."

My eyes were welling up with tears that he would even consider giving me something so beautiful. I opened up the clasp to look inside and almost dropped the box when I saw a picture of my mom on one side and a picture of us when we went to the beach. I was shaking so bad. I hadn't seen a picture of my mom in years. After she died, James took everything of hers and put it down in the basement or got rid of it. Somehow, I was able to sneak the book that I had and he never knew that it was hers but that was all I had of her. It was so strange looking at her face again. I remembered every detail of how she looked in my mind but to actually see a picture again made that image even more profound.

I leaped into his arms hugging him tightly. "Thank you, so much. You have no idea how much this means to me."

He pulled me into his lap and buried his face in my neck. "You're welcome."

I pulled away slightly to look at his face. 'Where did you get this anyway?" I asked, realizing that I hadn't seen a picture of my mom in years but here he is surprising me with one.

He took a deep breath and looked at me sheepishly. "You'll be mad if I tell you," he confessed.

I stared at him questioningly waiting for him to tell me, I wasn't going to let it go. He sighed heavily "Well, you're going to find out eventually anyway so I might as well tell you," he began. "That day I went for a run after the counseling session, I went to your old house." My eyes grew wide, in disbelief. He looked away not wanting to see my reaction. "I was walking through the rooms and I happened to go into James' room and saw all the nice stuff he had in there and I was angry so I picked up a bat that was sitting in the corner and was about to smash everything in sight but then I noticed something in the closet and pulled it out and it was a box of pictures and this picture was in there." He looked down at the locket that I was holding in my hand still not willing to make eye contact.

"So you took it out of a crime scene?" I asked.

"No," he said finally making eye contact. "I went back later with Emmett and he said I could take it since the investigation of the house was for the most part done. And he thought you should have it anyway."

"Oh," I replied simply. I was concerned about him getting in trouble, but I guess if Emmett said it was okay then it probably was. "It's beautiful Edward. I love it." I watched as his worried expression turned into a half smile.

"Do you want me to help you put it on?" He asked. I nodded my head and turned around on the bed. He took the box and pulled the necklace out. I held up my hair as he wrapped it around my neck. It took a while for him to get the clasp and I heard him say a few profanities under his breath. I held back laughing. Eventually he got it then leaned in and kissed the back of my neck. I tilted my head allowing him better access and leaned into him. I closed my eyes reveling in his kiss. His arms snaked around me and pulled me down onto the bed. We lay side by side and kissed for an endless amount of time. At some point Edward reached over and turned off the lamp and pulled the blankets over us. The ache I felt to have him closer was overwhelming but he wouldn't go any further than kissing even though I knew he wanted to. Eventually we fell asleep in each other's arms.

Early the next morning, there was a loud banging on the door that startled both of us. I shot up in bed looking around trying to figure out what was happening.

"Bella, come on, it's time to open presents," Seth shouted through the door and banging on it a few more times.

"I'll be down in a minute," I replied. Edward moaned and pulled me back down on the bed wrapping his arms around my waist.

"We have to get up Edward. Everyone is probably waiting for us," I giggled.

"They can open presents without us," he replied, pulling me even closer to him.

"Yes, but I don't think they would be very thrilled to find out that you slept up here last night, if they don't already know by now." He groaned and released me from his grip. We both sat up and rubbed our faces trying to wake up. I ran my fingers across the locket that he had given me and smiled to myself. It was perfect and I loved it. He was the most caring and loving person I had ever met and I loved him so much.

We walked hand in hand down stairs into the living room where everyone was sitting. Seth was looking at all the presents with wonder and excitement in his eyes. Leah was sitting on the couch with the same excitement, but she was trying to act cool, and hide it. Both Carlisle and Esme gave us questioning looks when they saw we came down together. But Edward was smooth he knew exactly how to cover his tracks.

"I wanted to give Bella her gift from me in private so I went up to her room early before anyone got up," he disclosed. "We weren't up there very long." They both seemed to accept that, or maybe they were just giving up on keeping us apart, knowing it wasn't working anyway.

Edward sat down in the chair and pulled me down with him sitting me on his lap. He laid his head against my shoulder and wrapped one hand around my waist while the other still held my hand. I felt slightly uncomfortable being this intimate in front of his parents but he didn't seem bothered by it and they both seemed to ignore us or pretend not to notice. I got the sense that he was testing his parents.

Carlisle announced that Seth could start passing out gifts and he dug right in. Edward and I were passed many gifts from everyone. Carlisle and Esme went overboard on the gift giving and spoiled us all with nice things. I was given an Ipod, lots of clothes, some books, and some decorative figurines that Esme helped Leah and Seth pick out. Leah got just about all the same things I did. Edward gave her a charm bracelet with a charm of a ballerina on it. He told me what he got her so I added to the charms and got her a charm of a wolf since it was her favorite animal. Seth was probably the most spoiled by everyone. Carlisle and Esme gave him an X-box game system as well as many other toys. Edward and I got him games to go along with his X-box. I gave Carlisle a couple medical books that I was hesitant about at first but Edward and Alice said it was perfect and he seemed to be very excited about it. I gave Esme a decorative crystal vase that she absolutely loved and I think I even saw tears in her eyes when she opened it. When Edward opened up his gift I was nervous. I didn't know if he would like it or not. But when he saw that it was a nice Fossil sports watch with a dark green face and metal band. He had the biggest smile on his face.

"You don't ever wear a watch and I didn't know if there was a reason for that but it reminded me of you," I explained timidly.

He looked up at me with a huge grin and leaned in giving me a simple kiss on the lips. "It's perfect, thank you," he said simply before taking it out of the box and putting it on. I was glad he liked it. I spent more on his gift than anyone else's.

Once everyone was done unwrapping gifts, Esme went to the kitchen to start preparing her Christmas dinner. She had invited a few people over for the occasion and I knew she was looking forward to having everyone together. I ran upstairs and quickly took a shower and got dressed. Carlisle drove me into work since he also had to check in on a few patients and do some paperwork. Edward was not happy when I left, but he didn't say anything and let me go. The day went by slowly and there really wasn't much to do but I kept myself busy.

Carlisle came to get me right at five saying that Esme was waiting for us to get home and people were already showing up. I quickly grabbed my stuff and headed home with Carlisle. When we walked in the door we were engulfed in the smells of the food cooking in the kitchen. Edward quickly came to my side and led me upstairs away from everyone before they could distract me with chit-chat. Once in my room he pulled me in for a passionate, full kiss.

"I've missed you so much today," he expressed, continuing to kiss down my chin and jaw. "My mom has been driving me crazy with questions. I finally had to go up into Seth's room to help him get all his stuff set up and batteries added just to get away from her."

"Well, I'm here now," I said, seductively. He looked down at me and smirked.

"Yes, you are, and mom wants you to wear that?" He gestured towards the bed where a dark purple turtleneck sweater laid across it. I looked back at him and noticed he was in a similar type of sweater that was dark grey. "It's kind of a tradition. Mom always buys us these ridiculous sweaters every year and likes us to wear them on Christmas day."

"Oh, that's really sweet," I remarked.

"It's stupid, but we do it to please her."

"No, it's nice. I'll clean up a little and change, then I'll come down."

He pulled me in for one more kiss. "I'll be waiting." He turned and left the room. I went across the hall into the bathroom and brushed my hair out, putting it up in a couple clips. I washed my face and added a little bit of eye shadow and mascara that Alice had given me, then finished it off with some shimmery lip gloss. I knew if Edward kissed me once, it would be gone, but I didn't care. I changed into the sweater and put on a white skirt that had ruffles on it with copper beading. I thought it went well with the sweater. At least, I hoped so.

I looked in the mirror one last time, then headed down stairs where I could hear people talking and in the background I heard a piano playing Christmas carols. I knew it was Edward. I had only heard him play once before on that day he brought me here but I could tell it was him. I walked into the living room and watched from the entry way for a minute, smiling as Seth sat next to him on the bench and attempted to sing the songs. He didn't really know the songs well but he pretended. Edward would laugh at his crazy made up lyrics occasionally. At some point, he looked up and saw me watching and abruptly stopped playing. At first, I thought maybe he was embarrassed that I was watching but a smile slowly spread across his face and he rose from the bench and walked towards me looking me over as he got closer. He leaned in and kissed my cheek and whispered in my ear. "Do you have any idea how incredibly sexy you look right now?" I smiled and blushed at his words. "It's really hard to not kiss you."

"Who says you can't," I said suggestively.

"If I start, I won't be able to stop," He hummed into my neck. He pulled back and grabbed my hand dragging me over to the piano and sitting me down next to him. "What do you want me to play?"

"I don't care, anything you play is perfect," I replied. He smirked and placed his hands on the keys. He adjusted his posture and cleared his throat. His fingers started moving across the piano keys, playing a beautiful tune. I watched him in awe as he started singing silent night. Before I knew it, Esme was standing behind us singing along with Edward. I noticed just about everyone in the room was watching in amazement of the two. When they were done singing, Esme leaned down and kissed Edward on the top of the head like he was still a little boy and placed a hand on my shoulder squeezing gently giving me a polite smile before venturing back into the kitchen.

Edward glanced over at me and almost seemed embarrassed. I wasn't sure if it was the singing with his mom or if it was the kiss she gave him on the head. "That was beautiful, you and your mom have amazing voices," I proclaimed.

"Thanks," he said shyly. Just then Emmett came barreling through the front door as loud as ever, carrying large packages.

"Edward, I need your help carrying in that thing you wanted me to get," Emmett said suspiciously. Edward turned to me and I furrowed my eyebrows at him curiously. He smiled and said he would be right back.

I looked around for the first time noticing who all was here. I noticed that both Sam and Garrett from the police station were here and a couple of the other doctors and their wives from the hospital were here. Alice and Jasper were here as well and I was surprised that I hadn't noticed them earlier. When Alice and I made eye contact she came bouncing over gracefully and slid in next to me on the piano bench.

"You and Edward are so cute together," she squealed. "I'm so glad everything is working out for both of you."

"We've had a couple rough patches but we always work through them," I confessed.

"And that's good. That means you both truly care about each other." She sat silent for a couple minutes contemplating something. "Have you given it up to him yet?" I turned my head to face her with a jolt.

"No, I haven't," I whispered.

"Really, he hasn't pressured you too?" She asked.

"He doesn't pressure me to do anything. And it's kind of a rule in the house," I disclosed.

"It's a rule?" She asked in disbelief.

"We can't have sex in the house," I explained. She laughed and repeated what I said. "Will you be quiet Alice?"

"Sorry, but that's funny. So the rule is not in the house but there's no stipulation about anywhere else right?" She asked.

"I guess not."

"I think my gift may help you in that department then. Well, I guess if you're willing to that is." Alice said, with a questioning look.

"What are you planning Alice?" I asked, knowing that her brain was scheming.

She smiled deviously. "You'll see."

After Edward came back in the house Esme announced that it was time to eat so everyone made their way to the kitchen to fill up their plates. The food was excellent and the conversation was nice. I still couldn't quite figure out what Alice was talking about and I hoped she didn't try to embarrass me in front of all these people.

Once everyone was done eating we congregated back in the living room and had some light conversation. Edward got up and went somewhere, saying he would be right back but after about twenty minutes of being gone I started to get worried. I walked by the kitchen looking for him and noticed Esme and Emmett in there talking. I heard Esme ask him what her name was and when they were going to get to meet her. Emmett looked embarrassed and slightly uncomfortable. I figured Emmett must have a new girl in his life. Edward had mentioned that he suspected Emmett was getting serious about a girl but he didn't know anything for sure. I walked past the kitchen and downstairs to his room where he was sitting on his couch with his eyes closed. I thought maybe he was sleeping but then he put his arms out to me to join him so I knew he was still awake in some sense. I crawled up into his lap and he held me close.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"Yeah, I just have a headache," he explained. "I took some Tylenol and now I'm just waiting for it to go away."

"Is there anything I can do to help?" I whispered, beginning to run my fingers through his hair.

He hummed in enjoyment. "Just do that." I continued to run my fingers through his hair and lay down on his shoulder. We stayed there for quite a while until Esme called downstairs to tell us a few people were leaving and we were going to open presents. Edward shot up and I almost fell when he did but he pulled both of us to our feet and rushed us upstairs.

We said goodnight to the doctor friends of Carlisle's and to Sam who had to get back on duty. I made sure to give him his gift as he left and he seemed surprised to be getting a gift. But he thanked me for it and thanked Esme and Carlisle for their hospitality. Afterwards, Edward sat us down on the couch and Emmett carried in an arm load of presents that he passed out to everyone. He got me a few movies that I was sure Edward gave him advice on. One of them was "Pollyanna" and the other was "The Sound of Music." After everyone had opened presents Emmett and Edward stood and asked that Seth, Leah and I to sit in the middle of the living room. I had no clue what was going on but they left the room for just a minute then came back carrying a box. We all looked at it with confused expressions on our faces.

"Inside that box is pictures and heirlooms from your mom's and we thought you would all like to have it," Edward explained.

"We thought maybe Esme could help all of you put a scrap book together or something," Emmett added.

We looked between each other a few times too afraid to actually look at what was in the box. Eventually, I pulled the lid off and we all hesitantly looked inside and began pulling pictures out. After a while we were all crying, as well as Esme who crawled down on the floor and started looking through them with us. This was by far the greatest gift anyone could have ever given us. Edward came over and sat down next to me putting an arm around my shoulders while I shared with him some of the memories we had through the pictures.

"Well, now that everyone is balling their eyes out, I don't know if I want to share my surprise now," Alice said. I had actually forgotten that she and Jasper were still here.

"Sorry Alice, we can look through more of these later," I announced closing up the box. "What did you want to share?"

"Okay, you all know my dad has connections all over the place and can get me anything I want right?" She began. "Well, when he told me about this particular thing, I instantly thought of Edward and Jasper."

"What is it Alice?" Edward asked.

"My dad got tickets to the Seattle Seahawks playoff game coming up in a couple weeks," she disclosed. I watched as Edward and Jasper's eyes as they grew bigger with every word she said. Then they both had huge grins on their faces.

"Are you saying you got Edward and I tickets to a playoff game?" Jasper asked.

"No, I got tickets for you, me, Edward, and Bella," she explained. "And since I know babysitting duty is still in affect I got two more tickets that either Emmett or one of the other police officers can use and bring someone along if they choose." She looked towards Emmett who had a huge smile on his face.

"I'm there," he said, simply.

All three of them seemed so excited and happy. I didn't understand the excitement they all had but the three boys were overjoyed and were almost giddy about this game.

"I already booked a hotel for us to stay in while we're in Seattle," Alice explained. "Emmett will you be bringing a guest or should I give the ticket to someone else?"

"I'll probably be bringing someone if that's okay with all of you?" He asked, looking between all of us.

"Well, well, are we actually going to meet the mystery girl Emmett's been seeing now?" Edward asked. Emmett glared and scowled at him. "Funny how the tables have turned huh Emmett? A couple weeks ago I remember you telling me that I should grow up and stop keeping secrets and now here you are doing the same thing.

"Well, at least I'm not hiding her because of something that shouldn't be hidden. She's just nervous about meeting everyone," he admitted.

"Edward," Carlisle reprimanded. "We'll meet her soon enough now stop teasing your brother."

Edward huffed and looked back to Alice thanking her for the gift. A little later Jasper and Alice left and Leah and Seth were sent to bed. Eventually Emmett left and Esme and Carlisle went to bed as well. Edward and I sat on the floor for most of the night looking through all the pictures. He listened intently as I explained every memory I had when I would come across a picture. There were so many pictures from when I was little and I was surprised I remembered so much of when they were taken. Eventually Edward and I went to bed. I tried to talk him into staying with me again but he wouldn't. I guess it was a little risky.

The following days I worked a lot and spent a lot of time with Esme who brought out a ton of scrapbooking supplies and began helping us put scrapbooks together with all the pictures. Edward tried to help or at least watch but I could tell he didn't know the first thing about making a scrapbook. Neither did I really but Esme was a great teacher.

Esme and Carlisle were invited to a New Year's party in Seattle so they made plans to stay the entire weekend as a little getaway. They made arrangements for Seth to spend the weekend with a doctor friend who had a son in Seth's class and Leah was invited to a New Year's sleep over party with a couple friends from school. So that left me and Edward and we knew there was no chance they were going to let us stay home alone. I asked Alice if I could spend the weekend with her and Edward made plans to stay with Emmett at his apartment.

There was also a huge party that some of the high school seniors were planning and Alice insisted that we come. I wasn't in the mood to go to a party but Edward tried to encourage me, saying it would be fun. I gave in and decided it would probably be fun for all of us to go.

On the day of New Year's Eve, Carlisle and Esme were busy packing up their bags and making sure Leah and Seth had everything they would need and getting them off to there destinations. So Edward and I stayed down in his game room and watched a movie. By mid afternoon I was getting a little bored with watching movies so I thought it would be fun to make cupcakes to bring to the party. Edward told me it wasn't necessary but I needed to do something. I was actually nervous about this party and spending the night with Alice, so I was trying to find something to keep my mind and hands busy.

Edward was trying to help but he was making more of a mess than anything. He leaned down on my shoulder as I mixed the batter. I reached up and playfully stuck a drop of the chocolate batter on his nose. We both giggled as he swung me around in his arms and rubbed his nose against my neck. I squealed at the stickiness he was leaving on my neck but he leaned in and licked every last drop of chocolate off my neck. Up until Carlisle walked in and cleared his throat. Edward pulled away and I went back to mixing the batter.

"So both of you have emergency numbers in case anything is wrong right?" he asked. "The police are going to be watching closely while we're gone. And we expect nothing but the best behavior."

"We know dad, we're just going to the party tonight and then Bella's going home with Alice and I'll head over to Emmett's," Edward said, rolling his eyes.

"Make sure you set the alarm when you leave," Carlisle reminded.

"I know dad, everything will be fine."

Esme came rushing down the stairs and hurled her suitcase to Carlisle to take out to the car. Then she went over the list just like Carlisle had. I could tell Edward was getting irritated. As soon as they were gone and I stuck the first batch of cupcakes in the oven Edward pulled me to the couch and finished what he started with the chocolate on my neck. I sat on his lap and began kissing his neck as well. He sighed and closed his eyes in pleasure. We made out on the couch until the buzzer on the oven went off. Edward groaned when I tried to get up and pulled me back to him but the buzzing was driving us both crazy so we had to get up. He followed me into the kitchen and wrapped his arms around me from behind, not letting me move around the kitchen without him. Just as I was beginning to frost the cupcakes, we heard the front door open and Emmett walk through calling out to us. Edward swore loudly enough for Emmett to hear then let go of me.

"Hey kids," Emmett greeted walking into the kitchen.

"Mom called you, didn't she?" Edward asked. Emmett didn't have to answer. "She can't even let us have a couple hours alone?"

"Sorry, Edward, you know how she is," Emmett apologized. "I just wanted to let you know that Garrett will be sitting in a car right outside and when you go to the party he'll follow. He won't bug either of you or cause any problems as long as there's nothing to worry about. We've set all kinds of cameras up outside here, at mom's request, that he'll monitor and know if anything goes wrong. You both know the panic numbers if there's a problem right?" We both nodded our heads. We had been over this at least a dozen times in the last month.

"Emmett, do you think this is even necessary anymore?" Edward asked. "There hasn't been any sign of him anywhere, maybe he's long gone."

"Well, it's better to be safe than sorry, you know?" He countered.

Edward leaned up against the counter with his arms crossed looking rather upset. He seemed to be thinking hard about something.

"What are you making Bella?" Emmett asked. I smiled and handed him a cupcake, knowing that's exactly what he wanted. He grinned and took the cupcake almost devouring the whole thing in one bite. I took out a plastic container and stuck some cupcakes inside.

"Here, why don't you take a few more?" I offered Emmett the container and he took it graciously saying he would give a couple to Garrett on his way out.

"So why aren't you following us around tonight?" Edward asked.

"I'll be back later, but I have a date tonight," he explained.

"Oh really, is it the mystery girl again?" Edward joked.

"Maybe it is, maybe it isn't," he countered.

"Well are we going to meet her at the game, or are you planning to keep her a secret there too?"

"Probably," he said, simply in response. "I've got to get going. You two have fun and I'll see you both tomorrow." He grabbed one more cupcake and walked towards the door. As soon as he was gone I walked over to Edward and wrapped my arms around his neck pulling him to me to kiss. I could tell he was tense and I wanted to make him relax.

My lips molded to his and our tongues met in the middle. "I'm all done with the cupcakes," I said breathlessly, while Edward's lips brushed across my collarbone. "We have a little while before we have to leave for the party. And we're alone." He stepped back from me and shook his head. I sighed heavily and frowned. I walked away from him and started cleaning up the mess from the cupcakes and packing them up to take with us.

"Bella, you know I want to, I just don't want you to do anything you aren't ready for," he said.

"Why do you think I'm not ready? I'm a big girl, Edward. I think I can decide what's right for me and what I'm ready for. I've been doing everything I'm supposed to do and talking about everything I'm feeling. I haven't been holding anything back. Yet you're still holding back and not sharing with me why you won't go any further," I exclaimed. "Am I not good enough for you? Do you not want to go any further with me?" He had a shocked expression on his face and shook his head vehemently.

"That's not why Bella," he shouted.

"Then explain it to me."

He huffed and ran his fingers through his hair nervously. Just as he opened his mouth to talk the phone rang. I rolled my eyes and walked over to the phone.

"Hello," I said irritated.

"That's no way to greet your best friend," Alice said.

"Sorry Alice," I said.

"Look, Bella I know you're going to be upset, but Jasper is with me right now and he's not feeling good. He has a fever and he looks awful. I'm going to make him stay here with me tonight so I can take care of him. I know we were supposed to go to the party and then you were coming over here but I really need to take care of him. I hope you understand."

"No, Alice it's fine, I understand," I replied.

"You aren't mad at me?"

"No," I giggled. "It'll be fine Alice, take care of Jasper and make sure you don't get sick in the process either."

"Thanks Bella, I'll see you at school next week."

"Sound's good, I'll talk to you later."

I hung up the phone and looked over at Edward who looked pained.

"That was Alice, Jasper's sick so she's going to take care of him tonight," I explained. He nodded his head in understanding. "I guess I could call someone else to see if I could stay with them for the weekend." He jumped away from the counter he was leaning against and walked over to me grabbing my arm just as I was about to pick up the phone.

"You don't have to go anywhere. This is your home and there's no reason why you can't stay here," he said.

"I can't stay here alone," I argued. He came closer and pulled me to him making my body flush with his.

"You won't be alone, I'll be here with you," he explained before leaning down and kissing me fully. This was different than any other kiss I had ever experienced with him. It was rough and forceful, full of passion and need. The ache to have more of him was so strong at that moment. I didn't want him to stop. He lifted me up onto the counter top and positioned himself between my legs. He pulled my shirt off and started kissing all over my neck and chest and stomach. It felt so good and I reveled in the touch of his soft lips on my skin. I removed his shirt as well wanting to feel his skin against mine. I wanted to taste him, to touch him. He continued leaving open mouth kisses everywhere and I kept trying to get closer to him, wrapping my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck, so he wouldn't pull away. When I reached down and undid the belt on his pants, I was nervous I didn't know what I was doing. I didn't know how far we were planning to take this. Esme's rule kept playing in my head but I wasn't listening. All I knew is I wanted Edward and I wanted all of him. When his belt was undone and I started unbuttoning his pants he pulled back slightly and looked down. He was panting and his breathing was erratic. I thought he was going to stop me but he didn't. Instead he picked me up and carried me towards the stairs in a rush. I kissed all along his neck and sucked on his earlobe as he carried me to my room.

He laid me down and I pulled him down on top of me. His eyes were dark and hooded. He reached behind me and removed my bra, cupping my breasts with his hands and kissing all along the smooth skin of my chest. I closed my eyes allowing myself to feel everything and not worry about what we were doing or what the consequences might be. Before I knew it Edward was removing my jeans and panties as well as his jeans and boxers. I was completely exposed to him and I was so nervous and scared but I did my best not to show it, I didn't want him to stop, I wanted this. He didn't talk or make any sounds other than his heavy breathing. I worried if he was okay but when I looked at his face he looked so lost in what he was doing, I didn't want to distract him.

He sat up abruptly and I was sure he was planning to stop so I pulled him back to me whispering "no."

He laughed and continued kissing my mouth, taking my bottom lip in between his. "Bella, before we go any further I need to get a condom." He leaned up taking my expression in, searching for any hesitation. I hid it and nodded my head. He hopped up off the bed and went in to the closet. I wasn't sure what he was doing since he had pretty much cleared out all his stuff from this room when I moved in. I didn't remember ever seeing any condoms in the closet. But when he came out he had a box in his hands that he placed on the nightstand before crawling back on the bed and sliding one on. He fell back on top of me and hitched one of my legs over his hip. He kept watching me waiting for me to tell him to stop but I didn't. I grabbed his neck and pulled him back to my lips. I kissed him hard and arched my back to get closer to him. After a few seconds I felt him at my entrance and he slowly began pushing his way in. It hurt, I won't lie. I wanted to tell him to stop but I couldn't. He went slowly and he groaned in my mouth as he went deeper and deeper inside. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes. My whole body felt like it was on fire. He started thrusting in to me and at first all I wanted to do was scream but I tried to stay focused on kissing him and ignore everything else. I knew the first time always hurt at least that's what I remember from sex education and from hearing stories from Alice and many others around school.

After a few minutes of him thrusting into me it started to not hurt as bad and actually felt good. I thrust my hips to meet his and we moved as one until this overwhelming feeling of euphoria and happiness came over me. I felt tingles go all through my body and I clenched my legs around him wanting it to last longer. He groaned loudly as he thrust once more into me, harder than any other time and collapsed on top of me. Our breath was heavy and we lay there unmoving for a few seconds. He finally sat up with a smile on his face as he looked down at me. His smile fell when he saw that I had tears in my eyes.

"Oh God, I'm so sorry," he breathed. He fell backwards onto the bed and covered his face with his hands saying the words "I'm sorry" over and over. He sounded almost like he was crying.

"Edward, what did I do wrong?" I asked beginning to cry too.

He took his hands away from his face and leaned up on his elbow. "Bella, you didn't do anything wrong, I did. I should have never let it go this far, I should have known better. I didn't want to hurt you. I'm so sorry," he said sadly.

I put my hand on his cheek and he leaned into it, closing his eyes. "Edward, it's okay. You don't have to be sorry. I could have told you to stop but I didn't want to."

"Don't lie to me Bella, you're crying. I hurt you."

"I'm not lying. Yes it hurt at first, but then it was okay and felt good. I don't want you to feel bad about anything."

"Why didn't you tell me to stop if it hurt?" He asked.

"I didn't want you to," I replied.

"It's not because you thought it's what I wanted?"

"Did you not want it?" I countered.

"Bella, don't ask that," he laughed lightly.

"Then please stop. I wanted this, you wanted this, and that's all that matters." He smiled, conceding to my plea and brushed the hair out of my face. He leaned in kissing me again and wrapping me up in his arms.

"I love you," he said.

I smiled at him and ran my fingers through his hair. "I love you."

We spent the rest of the night kissing and exploring each other's bodies with our hands and lips. At some point in the night we heard his phone ringing but he never bothered to answer it. Just as we started to hear distant fireworks going off we had sex once more. This time it didn't hurt nearly as bad and we were both much more at ease and enjoyed it so much more. Just as the sun was coming up we let the exhaustion take over and we fell asleep in each other's arms.

A few short hours later there was a loud banging. I pulled myself closer to Edward's chest trying to make the sound go away.

"Edward, are you coming down to watch the game?" I heard Emmett ask through the door.

Edward pulled me closer, burying his face in my hair and sighing.

"Edward, come on. You and Bella never left for the party last night, you aren't down in your room, you don't answer your phone, can you just make some sort of sound so I know you're both okay?" He insisted.

"I'll be down in a minute," Edward called.

"Will Bella be joining us?" Emmett asked. I looked up at Edward with wide eyes. I should have known Emmett would know. He watches us like a hawk and would have noticed that we didn't leave the house. Edward just smirked and brushed across my cheek with his fingers.

"Yeah probably," he responded to Emmett. I could hear Emmett chuckle behind the door before he descended the stairs. Edward leaned in and kissed my forehead and moaned.

"Edward is he going to tell your parents?"

"No," he said simply.

"How do you know, what if he does?" I asked in a panicked tone. "It was a rule Edward. What if they tell me to leave?"

"Bella," he said softly. "For one, Emmett won't say anything. I've kept enough of his secrets over the years that he owes me. Besides he likes you too much, he wouldn't do that to you. And two, even if they ever did find out, it doesn't matter. They wouldn't kick you out, and if they tried then I'd leave too. Wherever you are is where I'll be."

"Promise," I asked, smiling.

He laughed. "Promise," he whispered. "You're stuck with me as long as you want me."

"I'll always want you," I replied. He smiled and leaned in taking my bottom lip between his. We kissed for a while and I pulled myself up on top of him straddling his waist. His hands held my arms and he pulled me down to his lips. I sucked and kissed all along his neck tasting every part of him.

"Baby," he breathed. "As much as I would love to make love to you again, I don't feel comfortable with my brother in the house."

"Oh," I said, realizing I was getting a little carried away.

"Later though," he said, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

"I'm holding you to that," I said seductively. He laughed as I lifted myself off of him and lay down next to him on the bed. He got up and pulled on his boxers and jeans before opening the door and heading down stairs.

I pulled on my robe and headed to the bathroom to take a shower before I went down to face Emmett. I expected him to make some sort of joke about Edward and me, and I wasn't looking forward to it.

**EPOV**

I had no intentions of going that far with Bella. I knew she wanted to go further but to be honest I was scared. My worst fear was hurting her or making her regret being with me, so after that first counseling session when she said she hated me, I didn't ever want to hear those words from her mouth again, it hurt too much to even think about it. I promised myself that I wouldn't do anything until she was completely ready no matter how long I had to wait.

But then she surprised me when she got upset because I _wasn't_ going further. I contemplated while standing in the kitchen with her on what I should do. In one sense I didn't think she was ready for anything but making out and I knew she wouldn't get mad at me for that. But then in another sense if I didn't go further than she was going to start pulling away from me. So I decided that maybe we could go a little further and just see where things go. But I promised myself I wouldn't go all the way. I would stop myself.

When the phone rang and it was Alice telling us that she and Jasper weren't coming to the party and Bella had nowhere to stay for the weekend, it was like fate had dealt us a sweet hand. For once we could be alone for an entire night and there wouldn't be any interruptions. I knew Emmett would cover for us. He'd make comments about it for the next few weeks to try and get to me but I could handle that. I'd done it my entire life.

Somehow things seemed to go horribly wrong according to my plan and one thing led to another and she wasn't stopping me, she seemed like she wanted it just as much as I did. She was absolutely the most beautiful girl I had ever seen and I wanted all of her, I wanted to consume her and make her mine completely. So I slipped on a condom and pushed my way into her. She was so tight and so incredibly warm. It had been months since the last time I had sex and I almost came the second I entered. But I was able to hold back for a little bit longer and I pounded into her. I knew it was probably hurting her and I did everything I could to be as gentle as possible and pour out every bit of love I had for her in my kiss and not make it all about the sex. After the most amazing orgasm I'd ever had, I finally looked at her face and saw her eyes were watery and red and she was trembling. The guilt and sadness I felt at that moment was unbearable. I collapsed beside her and started telling her how sorry I was over and over and I knew nothing I said could make up for the pain I caused her. I was on the brim of tears and I didn't know what else to do. But she surprised me once again when she tried to comfort me instead of the other way around. She wasn't upset about anything. She was happy and didn't regret what happened. In that moment, I loved her more than I ever thought was even humanly possible. She finally trusted me and loved me unconditionally and I knew there was never going to be another girl like her in my life. I didn't want anyone else. All I ever wanted was her and I would follow her to the end of the world if I had to. I planned to be with her for the rest of my life.

I went straight into the kitchen and found my shirt on the counter and put it back on. Then I grabbed a couple bottles of water from the fridge. After kissing all night long I was severely dehydrated and needed some water. I downed about half the bottle before I walked into the living room where Emmett was sitting on the couch. I had a permanent grin on my face as I sat down next to him.

"Have a good night?" Emmett asked sarcastically.

"It was very pleasant. Thanks for asking," I replied.

"And how is Bella?" He asked in a serious tone.

"She's fine, why?" I asked.

"I just wanted to know that she's okay and not hurt in any way," he said casually.

"What, you think I would intentionally hurt her? Did you think I raped her or something?" I said in an angry tone.

"No Edward, I didn't think that, I hope you would have enough sense not to do that. But I do think that she has some serious issues that need to be dealt with and I'm just worried that you might be taking advantage of her vulnerability."

"It wasn't like I planned this." He looked over at me with a raised eyebrow like he didn't believe me. "I'm serious, we were just sitting in the kitchen talking and then the phone rang and it was Alice saying that Jasper was sick and she was planning to take care of him and all of a sudden Bella had nowhere to go, so we decided to stay here."

"Well, it would have been nice if you would have let us know that, or at least answered your phone so we knew you were okay. Garrett had to do three perimeter searches to make sure everything was secure. He called me during my date and wanted to know what to do. He didn't know if you had snuck by him somehow or if there was something wrong in the house. I assumed that you two were just taking advantage of the time alone but it made me very nervous that I had no way of knowing for sure. You're lucky I didn't come last night and break the door down," he exclaimed.

"I'm sorry Emmett. I should have been more responsible," I said regrettably.

"Just be careful, Edward. I don't want things to blow up in your face when something goes terribly wrong," he said with true concern.

"Emmett, I love her. I want to spend the rest of my life with her." I admitted. I wasn't sure why I said it but I think maybe I needed some advice or reassurance that it was okay. This was all new territory for me and I didn't know how to handle it.

"I know that's what's scaring me." I looked at him confused why that would scare him. "Mom and Dad have the same concern Edward. You've always been an easy going guy and never thought much about anything. You never had any goals in life or true passion in anything except for football and I'm not sure you ever considered it a plan for your future. I'm sure you would take it if it was offered but that isn't your goal like it is for some. Mom and dad want you to be somebody special, somebody important. Dad I'm sure wants you to follow in his footsteps and be a doctor. And after I screwed up my life you were all they had left to show they did a good job as parents. You are so talented in so many things and you could do anything if you would just put your mind to it. You're smart enough to become anything you ever wanted to be, but now you are so wrapped up in Bella and your entire world revolves around her. We're just afraid that you'll be giving up too much to be with her. And who knows how long this thing with her will last. I know how it feels right now but a year from now or even two or three, who knows where you both will be or what you both may have had to give up to be together. You know you have to go to college next year. Is she planning to go with you? Would she be able to get into the same college as you do? Does she even have plans to go to college? If you truly love her and plan to make a life with her someday, these are things you both need to discuss and figure out before one of you ends up resenting the other for what you've had to sacrifice to be together."

I never knew my brother could be so serious and make so much sense at the same time. But he was wrong about one thing. "Emmett," I began. "You didn't screw your life up. You made some bad choices yes, but in the end I truly believe you made the right choice. You're a good cop and I think that's what you were meant to be."

He chuckled. "Thanks Edward, that means a lot."

"I know, I should probably go to college but would it be such a bad thing if I didn't? I will if it's what everyone wants but only if in return I get what I want. And that's Bella. I'm not sacrificing my happiness with her to make everyone else happy."

He glanced over at me and studied my expression for a second. "Point taken," he said, and then turned his attention back to the game ending the discussion.

Bella walked into the room shortly after that and glanced between the two of us nervously. I was sure she was questioning whether or not Emmett was going to say anything. I reached out my hand to her letting her know it was okay. She walked towards me and took my hand. I pulled her down onto my lap and wrapped my arms around her waist. I handed her the other bottle of water since I was sure she was probably just as thirsty as I was. And she didn't disappoint when she started chugging the water down.

I thought about what Emmett said for a while and tried to go over every scenario of where my life could lead me and the only thing that was a constant fixture in my future regardless where it took me, was her. It's always her.


	17. Chapter 16

**A/N: I know some of you were a little shocked that they went to sex so fast but there's a reason for it. For one they're teenagers, that should explain alot lol. But also Bella has lived a controlling life for the past 8 years and since they are watched and in a way controlled by his parents at all times still, she's trying to break free and be her own person in an environment she feels safe in. Which is what everyone wants her to do. She doesn't regret it or think she did anything wrong but it was a huge step for her. And Edward was being a little rebellious and just wanted his family to let him go. He also has in a way lived a controlling life, not in the same way as Bella but his parents make alot of his decisions for him and are a little overbearing and he always just took it and never questioned anything they told him to do. So they kind of took advantage of the time alone and neither one of them planned to go this far but Edward is a boy and we all know what's on a boys mind 24/7 and Bella craves affection from anyone and right now Edward gives her that, he also makes her feel safe and loved which is something she hasn't had since she was little, so things got a little out of hand. They are both just trying to break free and live their own lives in their own way, but together. **

**Also I wanted to let you all know, if you're interested, I'm entering a one shot challenge and I should be posting that hopefully tomorrow, so go to my profile to find it later on if you want to check it out.**

**Thanks everyone for all the reviews and all the support, it makes writing so much easier. And as always thanks Bzeemomof4 and Redlulu for being such awesome bata's and such wonderful friends. Thanks for editing this chapter so quickly too.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or its characters.**

* * *

**Could it be and Harder: The Calling**

You left me with goodbye and open arms  
A cut so deep I don't deserve  
You were always invincible in my eyes  
the only thing against us now is time

[Chorus:]  
Could it be any harder to say goodbye and without you,  
Could it be any harder to watch you go, to face what's true  
If I only had one more day

I lie down and blind myself with laughter  
A quick fix of hope is what I'm needing  
And now i wish that i could turn back the hours  
But i know i just don't have the power

[Chorus]  
I'd jump at the chance  
We'd drink and we'd dance  
And I'd listen close to your every word,  
As if its your last, I know its your last,  
Cause today, oh, you're gone

[Chorus]

Like sand on my feet  
The smell of sweet perfume  
You stick to me forever, baby  
and I wish you didn't go,  
I wish you didn't go  
I wish you didn't go away  
To touch you again,  
With life in your hands  
It couldn't be any harder

**BPOV**

When the stream of light came through my window and hit my face, I opened my eyes slowly and looked around. Edward was lying next to me with one arm draped across my stomach holding me tightly to him. I smiled at how wonderful it felt to be in his arms. I loved waking up to him next to me. I laid there for quite a while watching him sleep so peacefully and just thinking about everything that had happened during the weekend.

Emmett agreed that he wouldn't say anything and he gave us the rest of the weekend together as long as we kept the alarms on and answered the phone if he happened to call, which he didn't. I think he felt sorry for us since we were always watched by everyone. Even though we knew that one of them was outside in a squat car watching over us, it still felt like we were completely alone.

I crawled out from underneath his arm, hoping I wouldn't wake him; I had to pee and I couldn't hold it any longer. I slipped on a football jersey that I had stolen from his room the day before and went to the bathroom.

When I came back into the room, Edward had rolled over onto his back but was still sound asleep. He looked so happy, I loved watching him sleep. He was the most beautiful, caring and loving man I had ever met. I never knew that someone could be so gentle and thoughtful. All I knew was abuse and demeaning behavior. But Edward never treated me like that. He loved me and cared about me more than anyone in my life ever had.

I saw a blanket of snow covering the ground and more snow falling from the window and walked over to look out. It must have snowed during the night which was going to make it harder for everyone to get home. Maybe we would even be lucky enough to have one more night alone, if everyone was stuck where they were.

I stood in the window watching the snow fall for a long time thinking about everything that has happened in the last month and how fast everything had changed. Just a few weeks ago, all I could think about was how to survive and keep my family safe, now all of a sudden I had a future and I could make plans for college or whatever I wanted to do. Last night, after Emmett left, Edward asked me what I wanted to do after graduation and honestly I had no idea. James always told everyone I wanted to go to culinary school. I did like to cook and invent new recipes, but I didn't want to do anything that made me think of him ever again. I wanted to make my own plans.

Edward asked if I would be willing to go to school wherever he goes but I don't know if I could get in to a school he's accepted to, or be able to afford it. He said he would pay for everything and we could apply to colleges together so we can find at least one that will take us both. I'd go wherever he wanted me to go to be with him, but I couldn't help thinking that maybe I wanted to do this on my own, without him. I didn't want to depend on him for everything. My only fear was that one of these days James was going to come back and I'd have to face him somehow, but without Edward I don't know if I could be strong enough.

I heard Edward moving on the bed behind me but I didn't turn around to see if he was awake. A few seconds later I felt his arms enclose around my waist from behind. He rested his chin on my shoulder.

"Are you alright?" He asked softly. I nodded my head.

"I was just thinking about how happy I am to be here."

"Are you happy?" He asked.

"Of course I am, I've never been happier in all my life," I replied.

"No regrets about anything?"

"No," I said, turning around in his arms and putting my arms around his neck lazily. "I could never regret anything with you Edward." I reached up on my tippy toes and kissed his lips.

"Do you have any idea how much I love you?" He asked pulling me even closer to his body. I giggled at how tight he was holding me. He let go slightly and I turned back around to face the window. He gently began kissing my neck.

"It's already noon, my parents are going to be home in about an hour." He stated.

"I know," I said, with sadness in my voice.

"I don't know how I'm going to survive without being able to touch you and wake up next to you now. It's going to be torture," he expressed.

"I'm sure you'll be able to handle it. And just think, in just a couple weeks we'll be staying in Seattle for the football game and we'll be alone there," I said, leaning back into his chest.

He hummed into my hair as we rocked back and forth. "I can't wait. But until then, I don't want to waste any more time we have today. He twisted me around in his arms and took my lips in his and began to pull us back to the bed. He fell backwards and pulled me on top of him and started hastily removing the jersey I wore. I giggled at his struggle to get it off of me while on top of him. Once it was off he pulled me to the pillows as he lay across me and started massaging and sucking on my breasts. I closed my eyes relishing in the sensation it brought to my body. My fingers wove into his hair while my legs wrapped around him, pulling him closer to me.

Just as we were beginning to let ourselves go we heard the snow crunch under tires pulling into the driveway. "Shit," Edward shouted. "It's my parents." He climbed off the bed and quickly searched for any clothes that were on the floor.

"How do you know? What if it's just the squat car?" I asked leaning up on my elbows to look at him.

"I know the sound of their car, that's them," he expressed, as he pulled on a pair of pants.

"Okay," I said, taking his word for it. I hopped off the bed to throw on some clothes as well. Edward picked up all the used condom wrappers off the floor and stuffed them in the garbage. I pulled my hair up into a ponytail and tried to straighten out the bedding as best I could.

After we were done fixing everything Edward looked across the room at me with sad eyes. "I fucking hate this," he whispered.

I closed the distance between us, wrapped my arms around his waist and leaned up to kiss him briefly. "I love you," I said quickly, before releasing him and grabbing his hand pulling him down stairs to face his parents.

We got down stairs and walked into the living room just as Esme walked in the front door. We were taken off guard by the fact that Leah, Seth, and Emmett were sitting on the couch watching cartoons. Emmett gave us a knowing smile but didn't say anything.

"You're already home?" Esme wondered, looking around at all of us.

"I went and picked up Seth and Leah just as the snow started to hit and Edward went to pick up Bella," Emmett explained. "I didn't want anyone driving them home in this snow. I'm actually surprised you're home already."

"Oh," she said exasperated. "I wasn't sure we were going to make it. As soon as we saw the snow we decided to head back. The ferry was packed and the roads were deadly. I'm glad everyone is home though, I didn't want anyone to have to go back out there."

Seconds later Carlisle walked in carrying their luggage. He gave all of us the same surprised look Esme had, so she took it upon herself to explain. He nodded his head noticeably exhausted and headed up stairs to unpack. Esme followed him seconds later after grabbing a couple bottles of water.

Once both Esme and Carlisle were upstairs, Edward glanced over at Emmett with questioning eyes. Emmett smirked and headed to the kitchen where Edward followed dragging me behind.

"How long have you been here?" Edward asked.

"A couple hours," he replied nonchalantly, while grabbing a soda from the fridge.

"Why didn't you let us know?"

"I think you may have been a little busy Edward," he said with a touch of sarcasm.

Edward rolled his eyes. "We were sleeping?"

"I'm sure you were. You could be thanking me for covering your ass though. What would have happened if mom and dad came home finding you two here with no one else? You were supposed to be at my apartment remember, and Bella was supposed to be with Alice. If they would have come home and saw you both coming down stairs the way you did without us here, you know you would be in a heap of trouble. Luckily you have a smart brother who willingly covers for you." Emmett was absolutely right. We never thought that far ahead I guess.

"Thanks," Edward said shortly. "So are you planning to watch us as closely as you do now when we're in Seattle?" Edward changed the subject, but I think maybe he was fishing for information about how much freedom we would have in Seattle.

Emmett rolled his eyes and laughed lightly. "God you are such a horny teenager. Bella, I really hope you know what you're doing by being with my brother." I blushed and hid my head behind Edward's shoulder.

"You didn't answer my question."

"Edward, I can't tell you from day to day what we'll be doing. There haven't been any sightings of James since he took off, so we have no idea what he's doing or whether he's anywhere nearby. If we could get any leads then things might be easier but there hasn't been anything. I can promise you that while in the hotel you will have all the freedom you want as long as you promise to keep your cell phone close just in case. I'll be bringing Rose with me so I'd like to have a little free time too."

"Rose, that's her name?" Edward smirked.

"Rosalie, but I call her Rose," Emmett explained.

"Are you planning to bring her by so everyone can meet her?" Edward asked.

"Possibly, if I can get my little brother to promise not to embarrass me," Emmett said, questioning Edward.

"Oh right, because he did such a good job at making me look good in front of my girlfriend," Edward joked.

"Emmett, he'll behave I promise," I cut in. They both stared at me for a second. I think maybe they both forgot that I was even in the room with them.

"Thanks Bella," Emmett said with a wide smile. "I like her Edward, you need to hang on to her."

Edward wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me in close to his side. "I plan to," he whispered then kissed me on the forehead. Esme walked into the kitchen with a heavy sigh and started searching through the cupboards.

"Does anyone have any idea what we should have for dinner?" She asked. "I should probably get something out to defrost. Have all of you eaten lunch yet? Maybe I should worry about making lunch first." She was clearly exhausted and could probably use a nap.

"Where's dad?" Emmett asked.

"Upstairs, he wanted to take a nap before he gets called into the hospital. You know with weather like this, he probably will get called in."

"Esme, I can take care of dinner tonight," I offered. "Why don't you take a nap with Carlisle? You look exhausted from your trip.

She smiled politely and nodded her head. "That would be nice dear, thank you." I smiled back at her and she headed back upstairs.

"I'm going to take Seth and Leah out to play in the snow. Do either of you want to join us? Emmett asked. I glanced up at Edward wondering what he would say but he was looking at me the same way. I finally answered since Edward clearly wasn't. "I think I'm going to get something to eat first, maybe I'll come out later."

"Yeah, I think we should eat first," Edward agreed. Emmett smirked, and then headed out to the living room to gather up Seth and Leah.

I went to the fridge and got out stuff to make us both a sandwich, and then we went down to his room to eat it. After we were finished eating we lounged on the couch comfortably nestled next to each other. We didn't say much since we were both still very tired. Edward's eyes were closed but I could tell by the way he was breathing he wasn't sleeping.

"Edward," I said quietly. He hummed in response. "Do you think James is going to come back?"

He took a deep breath into his lungs and his arm that was around my shoulders got slightly tighter. "No… I don't," he said. "I think he knows it would be a stupid idea to come back here."

"How can you be sure?"

"Bella, don't worry about it. He's not going to hurt you anymore. If he does come back, I'll protect you. I promise."

"I don't want you to though," I said. His eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"What do you mean you don't want me to protect you?" He asked with a hint of anger in his voice.

"I don't want you to get hurt while you're trying to defend me. I could never live with myself if something happened to you because of me."

"Bella, you can't expect me to sit by and watch if he did come back," Edward exclaimed.

"I'm not asking you to, but you could have someone else get involved so you don't have to."

"Like who, Emmett? Is this your way of telling me that you trust my brother more than me?" He was obviously getting mad with every word I said and he was taking everything the wrong way.

"That's not what I'm saying at all, I just know James and he's going to hurt you if you try to protect me and I can't let that happen."

"So it's okay for you to protect me from James, but I can't protect you? That makes a lot of sense." He got up and walked over to the window staring out with his arms crossed over his chest.

"Edward, why are you mad at me?" He turned back around to face me and I could see the hurt and anger in his face.

"You basically told me that if James were to come back I'm not allowed to help you or get involved because he might hurt me. But it's okay to send my brother in to save you even though he may get hurt, but I guess that doesn't matter. Or maybe you'd rather just let him do whatever he wants to you and we'll just stand back and watch while he beats the shit of you. I'm sorry but I can't do that. If he ever comes anywhere near you again I will kill him." He exclaimed. My eyes stung with tears.

I hopped off the couch and rushed to him but he turned away from me and stood rigid. "I'm sorry, don't be mad at me." I tried to pull his arm free from his chest but he wouldn't budge. "Edward, it's not that I want you to stand back and watch him hurt me or anyone else, I just don't want him to hurt _you_. I have to protect you because I love you and I don't want him to take you away from me. You're my life and I can't live without you."

His face softened and he looked down at me. "And you don't think I feel the same for you? Bella you're everything to me. I can't live without you either." He sighed and wiped the tears away from my eyes before pulling me into his arms. "I love you more than you can imagine and I will do whatever I have to keep you safe. Don't ask me not to because I won't listen."

"Can you at least promise me that you'll be careful?" I mumbled into his chest.

He stifled a laugh. "I can do that. But really Bella, there's no reason for it, he isn't going to come back, I promise." I nodded my head and sniffled.

"Come on, let's go outside and have a snowball fight with everyone else," Edward suggested. We walked up the stairs and put on our coats and gloves before heading outside.

We played in the snow for quite a while until we saw Carlisle come out and inform us that he had to head to the hospital for a couple hours. The snow had stopped falling by now but there had been a few accidents and they needed Carlisle to come in. Emmett offered to drive him in so we all went inside. I started making dinner while Edward played some video games with Seth and Leah.

When we went back to school the next week I talked to Alice about covering for us if anyone ever asked. Of course she agreed but she wanted to know details and I wasn't comfortable telling her everything. To me it was private and something Edward and I shared that no one else should be involved with. Alice wasn't real happy, but she understood. Plus I think she was more excited about all of us going to Seattle for the game so she was distracted.

When I got to fourth period Edward kissed me on the forehead before heading off to his own class. When I walked in, Jessica was glaring at me from across the room. I didn't understand why she still did that. Her and Edward broke up months ago but ever since she found out Edward and I were together she's been glaring at me and making little remarks about how I'm not good enough for him and how I'll never be able to make him happy. It hurt when she would say these things because part of me believed her. But then Edward would say something like he did yesterday, when we were discussing James, and make all that fear I had go away.

Once the bell rang I started gathering up all my stuff and when I stood, Jessica was in my way. I smiled at her and politely asked her to excuse me but she wouldn't let me by. I began to get really nervous because I didn't know what she was doing. Everyone else except for a couple of her friends had already left.

"Did you have a nice Christmas?" She asked.

"I did, thank you," I said politely.

"Did you spend it with Edward?"

"Of course I did, I am living with the Cullen's."

"Oh, that's right, you're an orphan now because you decided to tell Edward of all people that your dad was hurting you. Now because of you this whole town is in a state of fear," she accused.

"That's not what happened. I didn't mean to make everyone scared," I was on the brink of tears but I was trying to stay strong and not give her the satisfaction of getting to me.

"Why did you tell Edward?" She questioned. "You supposedly never told anyone for years and then out of the blue you decide to tell him? Is this all just some kind of game that you and your dad schemed up to hurt him or get money from him? I mean you have to admit it seems kind of odd that all of a sudden you are an abused child so you move in with one of the richest family in Forks but your dad is gone and no one can find him. Yet during all this time you get deeper and deeper connected to the Cullen's. It seems kind of coincidental don't you think? Was this whole thing planned? I'm sure they bought you all kinds of stuff too, like your new wardrobe and I saw you with an ipod earlier. And you're wearing this locket now that looks kind of expensive." I brushed my fingers across the locket Edward had given me. My stomach hurt at the accusations she was making. I could feel the traitor tears streaming down my face. "I think maybe your whole family, are scam artists and you're using the Cullen's to get money and whatever else you can get out of them."

"That's not true. I didn't want this to happen." I felt so small next to her. She reminded me of James when she accused me of planning all this. He would have done that. He would have twisted it all around and made it be my fault. That was one thing I had learned in counseling. I wasn't always at fault for everything even if James made it sound like it was. But I was powerless to make her stop.

"You know the only reason Edward is with you is because he feels sorry for you right? I mean there's no other explanation for it. You aren't that pretty and definitely not able to give him what he needs or make him happy. He deserves much better," she asserted.

"Jessica what the fuck are you doing?" Edward asked, in an angry tone. He stood in the doorway with teeth clenched and fists balled up at his sides. I was so glad he was here, I jerked my head in his direction and let out the breath I was holding. He pushed passed Jessica, who had bulging eyes from being caught, and came to my side wrapping an arm around me. "Are you okay?" He asked looking me over, wiping my tears away with his thumb. I nodded my head and leaned into his chest.

"I was just asking Bella to give you the Christmas present I got for you. I would have given it to you on Christmas Eve if you would have come over like you used to," she said sweetly. She pulled a wrapped gift out of her backpack and shoved it towards him.

"I don't want anything from you," he said.

"Edward, we always get each other gifts. I'm sure you got me something too, you just can't tell me about it with her around." She tipped her head in my direction with a scowl on her face. Edward started laughing and shaking his head in disbelief.

"Jessica what part of "we broke up" do you not understand? I didn't get you shit and I definitely don't want anything from you except for you to leave my girlfriend alone. We're never going to be together again, ever. Got it?" Jessica stared at him with wide eyes and her mouth hanging open. I couldn't help but smile at her expression.

"Come on, baby," Edward grabbed my hand and guided me out of the room. I followed him out to his car and got in. I could tell he was still mad but I didn't know if he was mad at me or her. When we started driving away he was gripping the steering wheel so tight his knuckles were white and I could see his jaw flex from grinding his teeth.

"Are you okay?" I asked. He didn't respond he only took a few cleansing breaths through his nose. I reached over and pried one of his hands away from the steering wheel, linking our fingers together. "Edward, talk to me," I begged.

"What did she say to you?" He asked.

"Nothing I haven't heard before. She just said you were with me because you felt sorry for me and that it will never last because I can't make you happy. She thinks I planned this whole thing and that I'm using you and your family for money." His nostrils flared and his grip on my hand got slightly tighter. He released my hand and sharply pulled off to the side of the road. I'd be lying if I wasn't just a little scared when he did this. It was very new to me too because I was never scared of Edward.

He turned his whole body to me and took both my hands in his. "You know that's not true right?" I nodded my head quickly. "Bella, I love you and I mean that whole heartedly. I'm not with you for any other reason besides that." I was surprised he decided to address the first part of my statement and not the second. I figured he might start questioning me about whether or not I was using his family for money also. I knew I wasn't but that didn't stop me from wondering if that's what people were thinking of us.

"I know, Edward, I didn't believe anything she was saying."

"Then why were you crying? Why didn't you tell her she's a lying bitch and to leave you alone?" He asked, looking confused.

"I didn't believe her, I know you love me and I love you, but she intimidates me and I don't know how to fight back against her."

"Did you feel mad at her at all?" He asked.

I shrugged my shoulders. "I guess, I did."

"Bella, I thought taking the self-defense classes were supposed to make you feel stronger, like you could fight back?"

"They teach me how to defend myself against an attacker, not how to tell someone off, who might be picking on me," I explained.

"Then I think you need to take a class on how to stick up for yourself," he added. I didn't say anything as he pulled back out onto the road and headed towards the hospital to drop me off for work. He kissed me briefly before I got out and headed in to work. There was a distance in his kiss; it was almost like he was upset with me. Maybe he believed what Jessica accused me of, I thought. I looked back once I reached the front door and saw him leaning his forehead against the steering wheel with his fingers in his hair pulling it back. He looked to be in deep thought or really mad, or maybe both. I didn't know what to do and I dwelled on it all day.

When Carlisle came down to the kitchen informing me it was time to go; I was glad. I needed to get home and talk to Edward. When we got home, Esme wanted us to sit down for dinner, so I knew I had to wait to talk to him until later, I just hope it wasn't going to be too much longer.

I walked down stairs where he was playing the guitar with Seth and watched for a few minutes. He didn't say anything even though I knew, he knew I was there.

"Edward, can I talk to you for a minute?" I asked. He looked up at me and nodded his head then handed the guitar to Seth so he could try for a little bit. He got up and walked into his room with me following behind him. He shut the door and turned around to face me.

"Why are you mad at me?" I asked.

His lips curled up into a half smile and he walked towards me, placing his hands on my shoulders. "I'm not mad at you, not at all. Why would you even think something like that?"

"You've barely said two words to me since I've been home. I know you were mad because I didn't stand up for myself against Jessica and I know I should have but I don't know how." I stated.

"I'm not mad at you, if anything I'm mad at myself for not being there to protect you from her. I'm more worried than anything else. I don't want people to think they can be mean to you because you don't stick up for yourself and I don't want you to let them. I want you to know how to fight back."

"You aren't questioning whether she's right about me using you for money? You didn't bring it up earlier when I mentioned that's what she accused me of and after you dropped me off I saw you in your car. You looked really upset and I started to wonder if maybe you believed her." I didn't want to bring it up but I was really wondering if he was and I needed to know. He smiled and brushed my hair off my shoulders.

"Bella, I know that's not true. I didn't bring it up earlier because it was pointless. I would never question that of you," he assured. "I don't care what Jessica thinks, no one would believe her and if they did then they're just as crazy as she is."

"Then why have you been so distant with me since I got home?" He pulled his hands back to his sides and took a couple steps backwards.

"I think you're going to be mad at me if I tell you," he said. I was confused. Why would I be mad? "If I tell you, will you promise not to tell me you hate me again? I don't think I can handle that again. It hurts too much even if I know you aren't serious."

"I won't say it, Edward, I promise I don't hate you, I never have."

He ducked his head avoiding eye contact and took a deep breath. "I went to talk to Dr. Weber." I took in a sharp breath. I felt hurt instantly. He could tell and he rushed to pull me into his arms. "I didn't go there to talk to her about you. Not completely anyway," he tried to explain. "I wanted to know what I could do to help you. What I should be doing. I'm sorry if you're mad at me but I'm only trying to help. Please try to understand." He held me so close to his chest that even if I wanted to speak, I couldn't.

"Edward, let go of me," I mumbled almost inaudible into his chest. Slowly he released me from his grip and stepped away. I looked up at him and I could see the fear in his eyes. I was upset but I kept repeating over and over in my mind that he was only trying to help.

"I'm not mad," I assured, before he got even more worried. I could clearly see his anxiety ease. "I would appreciate it if you would talk to me though before you talk to her. Just so I know what to expect."

"That's why I'm telling you now. I wasn't planning on it but Dr. Weber said I needed to be completely honest with you and not keep anything from you. That's why I've been distant because I knew I had to tell you but I was afraid you would be mad again."

"What did she say?"

He took a deep breath and pulled me to the edge of the bed to sit with him. "She said that I need to support you in everything you do and I need to talk to you more about how you're feeling and what you need. She said there isn't much I can do because you have to do it. I can't do it for you."

"So, is she saying that you should have let Jessica continue to harass me?" My eyebrows raised in confusion.

"No, she's saying I need to be patient and not expect you to know how to handle those situations right away. I need to support you in whatever way you choose to handle them and not get frustrated when you don't know what to do. I'm supposed to give you some distance and let you handle things on your own, but I'm not going to allow anyone to hurt you though. I can do everything else she suggested but that I can't do."

I bit my lip and nodded my head. He put his arm around my shoulder and kissed my hair gently.

"Dr. Weber plans to talk to you at your next session about some techniques and exercises you can try," he added. My anxiety shot up when he said that but I knew it was important to him that I learn how to stick up for myself, so I didn't say anything.

The following week when I saw Dr. Weber on Monday, she asked if I was aware that Edward came by and I said that I was. She was glad he chose to tell me. She wanted to know how I felt about it and whether or not I was okay with him talking to her. Honestly, I didn't like it because I was still holding back a little but Edward knew everything about me and I didn't want him to tell her everything, but I told her I didn't care. I decided I would have to talk to Edward about certain things I didn't want to discuss with her. Like the fact that Edward and I were having sex. I didn't feel like that had anything to do with my therapy and was not relevant to any treatment. That was private between me and Edward.

She had me try some roll play using puppets to talk about how I was feeling and what I wished I would have said when the incident with Jessica happened. I felt stupid doing it but I did it and afterwards I did feel a little better. Now, if I could just figure out how to express myself that way with an actual person.

Jessica didn't bug me any more after that and I wondered if Edward had said something more to her but I didn't ask.

That weekend was our big trip to Seattle and everyone was excited. Alice had tons of plans for our weekend stay, which included shopping, dinner at the space needle, museums, and of course the football game.

On Wednesday, when Esme, Leah, and I were on our way back from our self-defense class Esme announced that she wanted me to think about taking birth control. I panicked at first. I wondered if maybe she knew about me and Edward somehow.

"I know you and Edward aren't having sex right now," she said. My panic subsided temporarily but I still didn't understand where this was coming from. "I just think that it would be safer if you started taking it, just in case. Plus I think with this trip all of you are planning to take this weekend you should have someone talk to you about safe sex and I don't think you want me or Carlisle to be the ones to discuss that with you." I was glad it was dark in the car so she couldn't see the expression on my face. Otherwise I'm sure it would give us away.

"Esme, I took sex-education in school. It was a requirement. I know the basics of safe sex and what precautions to take." I was surprised at how easy it was to say that to her but I needed her to understand that Edward and I were being safe. He used a condom every time and I don't think either of us have any diseases to worry about. At least, I know I didn't. I wasn't completely sure about him but I didn't think he would.

"It would make me and Carlisle feel better if you did but we'll leave it up to you to decide," she offered.

"If you think it would be a good idea then I guess I'll will," I accepted.

"Good, I made you an appointment for tomorrow with my gynecologist."

"Tomorrow…?" That was unexpected. I figured it would be a few weeks but I guess since she already made the appointment and I said I would, I'd have to do it.

The following day Esme picked me up from school an hour early and took me to the hospital. She checked me in and the receptionist handed me a bunch of forms to fill out. Most of the family history I didn't know so I kept it blank. I could feel Esme peeking over my shoulder as I filled it out and I was worried about what type of an exam they would do. Would the doctor be able to tell that I wasn't a virgin? Would she tell Esme? My anxiety was so high and I was sure Esme could tell. When the nurse came out and called my name I jumped and let out a small shriek in fright.

Esme reached over and rubbed my back. "It'll be fine, there's nothing to worry about. I'll wait right here for you." I was glad she wasn't coming in with me.

The nurse took my vitals like I remembered they did when I was in the hospital then gave me a gown and said the doctor would be in shortly. I was sweating and scared about what would happen. I asked Alice about it and she gave me some details, which only resulted in more anxiety.

When the doctor came in, the first few minutes she asked some questions and made notes in my chart. When she asked if I have had intercourse my mouth got really dry and I almost wanted to cry from the anxiety I had. Esme could ask the doctor about me. She did say this was her doctor after all. Or Carlisle could probably access my record easily since he worked here.

"Isabella, you don't need to be scared, anything you tell me in this room is confidential and no one has to know unless you want them too," Doctor, whatever her name was, said. I didn't remember what she said her name was, I was so nervous. "If you are having intercourse willingly then I think it would be a very good idea for you to be on birth control but if someone is forcing themselves on you in any way you need to let me know. I was informed of your background and I know it would be easy for someone to take advantage of you. Esme told me you and her son Edward are very close but she doesn't think you are having sex yet but she wasn't sure. If he is doing anything to you that you don't feel comfortable with you need to tell me and not worry about what the consequences might be when it comes to the Cullen family." I realized my anxiety was probably giving her the wrong idea and I needed to fix this and just be honest.

"It's not like that. Edward would never do anything to hurt me. I'm just worried that Carlisle or Esme will be able to find out somehow and they would make me leave."

"So I take it, you and Edward have been intimate?" She asked. I nodded my head hesitantly.

"And this was consensual? He didn't force you or make you feel like you had to?"

"No, like I said he would never do that," I repeated.

"Well, like I said, anything discussed in this room is confidential so they won't find out unless you choose to tell them. I do have a couple questions though. First off, how long has this been going on?"

"The first time was on New Year's," I answered.

"And was that your first time with anyone?" I nodded my head to answer.

"Did you use any type of protection?

"He used a condom every time."

"Alright, I'm going to do the exam, then I'm going to send you out to the lab to get blood drawn just to be sure, then I think it would be wise to start taking birth control," she suggested. "Sometimes it can take a while for the birth control to work affectively, so for the first month I want you to be sure to continue using a condom every time." I nodded my head once again, letting her know I understood.

She asked me to lay back and she did the internal exam which was very uncomfortable but it only lasted a couple seconds. Then she went over the different options of birth control. I chose the shot since it seemed a lot easier than trying to remember to take a pill every day. Once I was dressed the nurse came in and gave me the shot and handed me all kinds of pamphlets about safe sex and birth control and handed me a handful of sample condoms. My face reddened deeply when I took them. I had nowhere to put them so Esme wouldn't see. I thought about just throwing them away but instead I just shoved them in my pockets and pulled my shirt down as far as I could. I hoped it wasn't too obvious.

The drive home I didn't want to talk to Esme about it at all so I pulled out the ipod and put in the ear plugs so she wouldn't ask questions.

When we got home, Edward was there and when he saw my expression he could tell something was wrong. He grabbed my arm and pulled me down to his room. "What happened, I thought you were just going in for a check-up? Did they find something wrong?"

"No, Esme took me to get birth control," I answered. His eyes grew large and his mouth hung open. "Don't worry she doesn't know. I think she might be suspicious but she doesn't know. I think she's worried about something happening this weekend though." I reached into my pockets and handed him the handful of condoms they gave me. "Here, I guess these are for you." He stared down at them, his eyebrows furrowed.

"If you're on birth control why do we need these?" He asked.

"The doctor said the birth control can take a while to work so she said for the first month it would be wise to continue using condoms." He nodded his head slowly still staring at his hands that held the condoms.

"Why didn't you tell me this was why you were going to the doctor?" He asked.

"Because I knew you would think Esme knew somehow and panic; which would make my anxiety worse than it already was," I replied.

He threw the condoms on the bed and pulled me into his arms. "Maybe it was a good thing you didn't tell me then. But everything was okay right? No problems or anything?"

"Everything is fine, I had blood drawn just to be safe but she said there shouldn't be any problems."

"Good," he sighed in relief, before kissing me deeply. I got the impression the handful of condoms aroused him and he wasn't thinking. His hands started tracing their way up my spine underneath my shirt. When he got to the clasp of my bra and started fumbling with it to open. I pulled away from him.

"Edward, your mom is right upstairs," I panted.

"Sorry, I wasn't thinking." He gave me a mischievous smile.

"It's only a couple more days, and then we'll be alone," I said. He nodded his head and smirked.

"I'm so looking forward to it," he said with a raised eyebrow. I laughed. He walked across the room and picked up a bag that was on his desk. "Alice left this for you," he said, handing me the bag.

"What is it?" I asked.

"I have no idea; she said it was something you would need for this weekend. She was actually disappointed that you left early because she wanted to give it to you herself, but I promised I wouldn't look and that I would make sure you got it."

I took the bag then told him I was going to go upstairs and take a shower.

Once I was alone in my room, I opened the bag and pulled out a sheer, light blue, baby doll piece of lingerie, with matching panties. My face heated instantly from embarrassment. Why did Alice buy me this? I would never wear something like this, especially in this house. Then I realized that she probably wanted me to bring it with us when we went to Seattle. I quickly stuffed it back in the bag and hid it in the back of the closet. I don't think I will pack it and bring it with me. I don't think I could actually go through with it. But then I started to think that Edward might like it so I decided that maybe I could bring it and try to wear it. I wasn't sure if I actually would though.

Later that night, I woke to yet again another dream. They had started coming less frequent but I was still having them. This one was different though. I watched James beat Edward incessantly but I was there pushing him away and shoving him off of Edward. I was fighting back. I was excited but scared at the same time. I wanted to tell someone, I wanted to tell Edward that it was different. I wanted to tell him that I was saving him.

I hopped out of bed and slowly snuck down stairs so I wouldn't wake anyone up. When I got to the kitchen there was a loud crash of thunder that scared me so I ran across the floor and darted down the stairs as fast as I could. I could hear the rain hitting the house and see the flash of light from the lightening. I looked up at the window just as I hit the last step and saw the face I never wanted to see again. My heart felt like it stopped and I couldn't breathe. I wanted to scream, I wanted to yell for help but nothing would come out. I stared at the face on the other side of the window and he stared back, glaring the entire time. I closed my eyes and started to back up the stairs to get away from him.

**EPOV**

I was suddenly woken by a thumping sound outside of my bedroom. I didn't know what it was at first but then I heard the crash of thunder outside and assumed that must have been what I heard. I tried to go back to sleep but I could faintly hear a whimpering sound and I could hear a scratching against my wall. I decided to get up to find out what it was. It was probably just a tree scratching against the side of the house from the wind blowing it, but I wanted to be sure. I was surprised when I saw Bella sitting on the stairs and crawling her way up backwards. It scared me. I didn't know what had happened. I called out to her but her eyes were closed and it didn't look like she could hear me.

I leaned down next to her and touched her shoulder with my hand, saying her name softly once again. She jerked away from me and threw herself into the wall on the other side of the stairs. She started screaming so loud it freaked me out so bad and I jumped back hitting the other wall.

"Edward, what happened?" Carlisle shouted, flipping on the lights and rushing down the stairs.

"I don't know," I shouted back. "I found her here like this. She won't let me get anywhere near her." At that second her eyes shot open and she looked towards the window. After a couple seconds she stopped screaming and turned towards me. Then suddenly she lunged toward me and wrapped her arms around my neck. It startled me at first, and she about knocked me down. Once I got over the initial shock I held her tightly, rubbing her back, attempting to sooth her.

"Do you think it was the storm?" Esme asked. I stared at her blankly because I had no idea what happened. "What was she doing down here anyway?"

"Like I told dad, I found her on the steps, I don't know what happened," I replied.

"Why don't you bring her upstairs Edward?" Carlisle suggested. I picked her up in my arms and her soft whimpers were muffled from her face being buried in my chest. I wanted to know what happened, what made her so scared. What I could do to fix it.

Once we got to the first floor of the house, I went into the living room and sat her down on the couch. Seth and Leah were standing at the bottom of the stairs with terrified expressions. Esme assured them everything was fine and told them to go back to bed. I had intended to go into the kitchen where my dad was to find out what he thought happened and what we should do, but she clung to my neck and wouldn't let me move. So, I sat down next to her and pulled her into my lap, holding her protectively. She was still whimpering and I could feel her heart racing through the fabric of both of our pajamas.

"He was here," she mumbled.

"What," I asked. I wasn't sure what she was talking about.

"James." A chill ran down my spine when I realized what happened. I yelled for my parents and they came rushing into the living room to see what was wrong.

"She said she saw James," I informed.

"What… did she say where she saw him? Carlisle asked. Esme was already on the phone with the police.

"No, she just said he was here," I clarified.

"See if you can get her to tell you more?" Carlisle pressed.

"Baby, can you tell me where you saw him?" I asked, while brushing the hair away from her tear streaked face. She looked up slightly to answer.

"He was looking through your window, when he saw me he glared at me. I tried to close my eyes and make him go away, I tried to get back up the stairs," she explained. "Edward, he was going to hurt you, he was coming after you." She sat up staring at me with wide eyes.

"It's okay, he isn't here now. He can't hurt anyone," I comforted. I pulled her back into my arms and rubbed her arm.

A few minutes later Emmett and Garrett showed up. They asked Bella the same questions I had just asked, and then they searched the outside of the house and the inside just to be sure. When they came back in they said that there didn't seem to be any sign of anyone being around and even the cameras showed nothing. But I knew there was ways to get around the cameras if he was here.

Bella was so adamant that she saw him. She was sure he was coming after me. She thought that of all places to see him in the house, there was a reason why she saw him in my window. She made a good point, but I had to wonder if this was just another one of her dreams. Maybe she was sleep walking now too. I didn't know what to think.

"Edward, we didn't see anything," Emmett informed me once again. "There were no signs of anything. It could have been her imagination."

"Emmett, if she said she saw him, she saw him. He's been a police officer for years. You don't think he would know how to get by security camera's or know how to cover up his tracks? Think about it, there's a really bad rain storm tonight, it would wash away any evidence of him being here." My voice was raised and I was getting a little mad at him for not trusting her. I had doubts too but I had to support her and believe her, no matter what. That's what the counselor said. This was a huge thing to her and I wasn't going to let her down.

"Why don't we all go to bed?" Carlisle suggested. "It's been a long night for everyone and I'm sure we could all use a couple extra hours before we need to get up.

"I'll keep patrol outside," Garrett stated.

"I'm going to stay here in the house and keep an eye on things," Emmett informed us.

I stood up carrying Bella upstairs and laid her down on her bed. "Edward, you can't go down there. Please just stay here with me," she begged.

I turned around to my parents with pleading eyes. "We aren't going to do anything, you know that. Just let me stay with her so she can calm down and get some sleep."

"Go ahead," Esme agreed. "But I want the door left open." I lay down next to her and pulled her into my arms resting my chin on the top of her head. Esme sighed then walked down the hall to her room.

"Edward, you can't sleep down there anymore. You can have your room back, I can share with Leah. You can't be that far away from me," Bella said, timidly.

"Bella, I'll be fine. James isn't going to hurt me," I tried to convince her.

"You do believe me don't you?" She asked with a shaky voice.

"Of course I do, but he can't get to me if there are cops surrounding our house. Garrett is outside, and Emmett is right down stairs."

"But what about tomorrow, and the next night, and the night after that…? We're never going to be safe as long as he's still out there."

"Baby, don't worry about it tonight, we'll figure everything out in the morning. Try to get some sleep."

I waited for a long time until I heard her steady breathing and felt her heart rate turn to normal before I finally let exhaustion take me as well.

When we woke the next morning we went downstairs and Bella still clung to me, not letting me out of her sight. I know she was worried and thought he was after me but everyone else in the house was convinced it was her imagination or only a dream. I wanted to believe her but I was beginning to think that too.

On the way to school she barely said two words to me. I knew she was feeling betrayed and confused about what was going on.

"Bella, I know you think you saw him and everyone's on high alert because of it, but wouldn't it be better if it was just a dream?"

"But that's just it Edward, I know it wasn't a dream. That's why I was down there, why I was going to your room. I woke up from another dream where James was hurting you but this time I was fighting back, I was trying to protect you. I was so excited and I wanted to tell you about it. That's why I was down there. But then I saw him," Bella explained. "You always believed me before when I told you the first time that he was hurting us. Why do you not believe me now?"

I reached for her hand and brought it to my lips, kissing it gently. "I do believe you, don't ever doubt that."

Later that day we were supposed to head to Seattle for the weekend and I tried to convince her that it might be a better idea to stay home but she insisted that we still go. She didn't want to disappoint anyone. So we packed our bags and made final arrangements with everyone.

Emmett showed up at the house, bringing along his date for the weekend and we were finally able to meet Rosalie.

"It's so nice to meet you dear," my mom greeted.

"It's nice to finally meet you too," she offered.

"This is my brother Edward and his girlfriend Bella," Emmett introduced. I extended a hand to her and she shook it then turned her attention to Bella.

"So you're the girl that keeps taking Emmett away from me?" I didn't like her accusation the minute she said it. Bella didn't need to feel guilty about anything else. I sucked in a ragged breath through my clenched teeth and shot Emmett a warning look.

"Rose, I told you this is my job, and this is my family. All of them," Emmett said.

I squeezed Bella's hand reassuringly. "Are we ready to go?" I asked. Bella nodded her head and grabbed her suitcase.

"Garrett will be here most of the time to keep an eye on things while we're gone and we have a couple new recruits named Jared and Paul who live down at the Quileute reservation who have agreed to help us out a little so the rest of us can actually get some sleep." Emmett explained. "Everything will be fine mom. I'll keep in close contact with everyone and just remember to keep all the doors locked and alarms on."

She put her arms around his neck and kissed him gently on the cheek. "You just worry about keeping you and your brother safe," she whispered into his ear. Then she gave me a hug goodbye as well as Bella.

Once we were gone, we went and picked up Alice and Jasper. Emmett and Rose drove behind us in the jeep. Alice talked the entire drive there but both Bella and I were silent. I knew she wasn't going to be enjoying this weekend very much. I knew she was worrying about Seth, Leah and my parents. I knew she was worrying about me. I wish I could take all her fear away from her.

When we arrived at the hotel and checked into all of our rooms, Emmett did a quick search of all of them for anything suspicious. I thought it was kind of ridiculous since it was highly unlikely James knew we were here but I got the impression that maybe he was trying to impress Rosalie.

Once Bella and I were in our room and the deadbolt locked I sat her down on the bed.

"Bella, we don't have to be here if you don't want to. We can go home," I offered.

"No, I want to be here," she expressed. "This is the safest place for you right now. Someplace he can't get to you."

"Well, we don't have to go anywhere, we can stay here at the hotel if you feel safer here," I suggested.

"Edward, I'll be fine. I need to do this, to get back a sense of normalcy." I nodded my head and started getting ready for dinner.

Alice had made reservations for the Space Needle restaurant which was fun. Bella was even participating in conversation and laughed a few times at Emmett's jokes.

Once we were back at the hotel she looked completely exhausted, so I helped her get her pajamas on and crawled into the bed with her and held her closely to me so she could sleep.

The next morning she still didn't look much better but she was trying. We went to breakfast then went shopping for a little while before getting ready for the game and heading over to the stadium. Emmett was never a few feet away from us and he informed us repeatedly during the day that everything back home was fine. With every call Emmett made back home Bella's anxiety subsided and she didn't look like a zombie as much.

When we were in the stadium trying to find our seats, Bella tripped and bumped into some guy, spilling his soda all over him.

"What the fuck kid," he yelled.

"I'm sorry," Bella said timidly. "I didn't mean to.

"You need to watch where the fuck you're going?" he said.

"And you need to learn some fucking manners," I shouted. "She said she was sorry, it was only an accident."

"Edward, let's just go," Bella begged. I glance in her direction and she had tears in her eyes.

I could hear Emmett's new girlfriend, Rosalie snickering. "Clumsy little thing isn't she?" She said. It irritated me and I wanted to turn my anger on her next. But I could tell Bella was scared, and getting mad would just make it worse.

I sighed then threw some money at the guy and apologized once again and walked away.

During the entire game my focus was on her. She seemed so upset by what happened with that guy and the soda. I didn't understand why, it was only an accident and not that big of a deal. It was bound to happen to someone.

Once the game was over and we headed back to the hotel, Emmett and Rose wanted to go to a nearby nightclub and Jasper and Alice had plans for a romantic dinner for two. Obviously, since Bella and I couldn't go to the night club, I promised Emmett we would stay in the hotel room and keep the door locked. I ordered room service for us but she barely picked at it.

"Baby, I'm starting to get really worried about you," I said. "You've been so distant all weekend and you've barely talked to me. What can I do to make you feel better?"

"You can tell me James won't ever come back. You can tell me he's gone for good and I don't have to be scared. You can tell me everything is just a dream and I'm going to wake up in my old bed and go downstairs to cook James breakfast and all this will go away. I don't want to live like this anymore." She started crying and her voice was shaky. I grabbed her and pulled her into my lap.

"It's going to be okay, we'll get through this Bella. I promise you, we'll be okay."

Before I knew what was happening she attacked my lips with hers. Her hands roamed up my chest and began pulling my shirt off.

"Bella, what are you doing? We don't have to do this."

"I want to Edward, please. I want to forget about everything I'm scared of and only focus on you. Please," she begged.

I hesitated for a second, just staring into her pleading eyes. I lifted her up by the waist and laid her back on the pillows gently. How could I tell her no?

Once I started kissing across her jaw and down her neck I felt her entire body relax. I wanted her to relax and feel good. I slowly removed all her clothing and mine as well. I kissed and licked every inch of her body I could find. When my tongue brushed across her clit, she jumped.

"What are you doing?" She shouted.

"Relax, it's alright," I said, placing my hand on her stomach to still her. I slowly licked across her slit and sucked on her clit. She hummed in pleasure and thrashed her head across the pillows. Every sound she made only made me want to continue. I could tell she was enjoying it.

Once her body stopped convulsing from her orgasm, I sat up on my knees and slipped on a condom, I slid easily into her. She wrapped her legs around my hips and her hands tangled their way into my hair. I loved that. We both panted and hummed as our bodies rocked in unison until we both released and fell into a tangled heap on the bed.

"Wow," she said. I laughed. "What was that?"

"What was what?" I asked.

"You… down there?" She asked shyly. I was sure she was blushing in the dark. I reached over and brushed my fingers across her cheek imagining the rosy color they produced.

"It's called an oral Bella. You could do it for me too," I added.

"You want me to do that to you?" She asked. I could hear the hesitation in her voice. I chuckled and pulled her into my arms.

"Not right now, maybe eventually we'll get to that point," I clarified.

"I liked it," she mumbled into my neck.

"I thought you might. Did it help to relax you?" I asked. She nodded her head. "Good." I pulled her closer to me and kissed the top of her head. "Get some sleep baby."

Just as I was about to let the exhaustion take over me I heard her say my name quietly. I hummed in response.

"I'm sorry this weekend didn't turn out the way you wanted it to," she said regrettably. I opened my eyes and moved slightly to look down at her.

"Bella, don't apologize. This weekend was amazing for the one fact that I got to spend it with you."

"I know but I wanted this to be special and Alice even bought me some lingerie that I wasn't sure I wanted to even wear but I thought you would love it so I planned to maybe try and then everything fell apart," she informed. She got my attention when she mentioned lingerie.

"Alice bought you lingerie?" I asked, getting slightly excited at the thought of seeing her in anything skimpy or see through or whatever. I couldn't help the arousal just the thought of it caused. She nodded her head timidly.

"Did you bring it with you?" I asked. Again she nodded timidly. "Would you be willing to try it on now?"

She sat up to look at me and I could faintly make out her blush in the dark. "Do you want me to?" She asked. Was she kidding? Of course I wanted her to.

"Only if you want to," I tried to be considerate. She sat there staring down at me for a few brief seconds before taking a deep breath and slowly sliding out of the bed.

She pulled on my shirt before turning on the light and searching through her suitcase. I watched her intently waiting for some glimpse of what it looked like. Once she noticed I was watching she smiled over her shoulder and turned her body so I couldn't see. I flopped back down on the bed in a huff and she walked to the bathroom. I think I heard her giggling which was so nice to hear again. I got up and pulled on my boxers so I could get a drink of water and grab a few more condoms from my suitcase, just in case.

I sat on the edge of the bed waiting for her to come out. After waiting ten minutes at least, I finally knocked on the door.

"Bella, are you okay?" I called.

"I'm fine, I'll be right out," she said quietly.

"You don't have to do this if you don't want to," I offered.

"It's okay, I'm almost ready."

I sat back down on the edge of the bed and started chugging the water. When I heard the click of the door, I pulled the bottle away from my mouth and just about choked on the water I had in my mouth, when I saw her.

She stood next to the wall looking so nervous and staring down at the floor in a see through light blue piece of material that barely covered her chest and fell just at her hips. I could see the matching panties underneath and all I wanted to do was remove them and get inside of her. A smile was spreading across my face and I dropped the bottle on the floor before I flew across the room and wrapped her up in my arms and kissed her hard and greedy. I wanted her so fucking bad it hurt. I pushed her up against the wall and stepped back a second to take every inch of her in before attacking her neck with kisses.

"Do you have any idea how incredibly beautiful you are?" I whispered into her ear. She smiled and sucked in a triumphant breath before wrapping her arms around my neck and kissing me fully on the mouth. When I picked her up slightly and held her against the wall she wrapped her legs around my waist and giggled into my mouth. It was the most beautiful sound I have ever heard.

I carried her to the bed, and dropped her down. She laughed so loudly I couldn't help but laugh with her. I crawled over her and brushed my fingers across the soft material barely covering her body. She started to sit up to remove it but I stopped her.

"Leave it on, I like it," I smiled down at her. I reached down and removed the panties and threw them across the room. I rolled us over so she was on top of me and grabbed the condom off the night stand slipping it on then guiding her on to me. She looked nervous being on top but I smiled up at her trying to reassure her it was okay. I wanted to watch her in the little nighty she was wearing. I grabbed her hips and helped her rock against me. She was so beautiful when she came and I followed shortly after.

When I finally caught my breath and removed the condom, I flipped the light off and pulled her into my arms so we could finally get some sleep.

"Edward," she whispered.

I chuckled. "Don't tell me you have another nighty to try on." She laughed too.

"No, I just wanted to thank you," she said.

"Thank me for what?" I asked, confused.

"For being so caring and gentle with me, and for being so thoughtful and protective, for being the best friend I've ever had," she answered.

"Is that all I am, just a friend?" I teased.

"You know what I mean," she said, slapping me across the chest playfully and I laughed. "When I'm with you I feel safe and carefree. Like I can do anything and I don't have a fear in the world. I love you for giving me that comfort."

My lips curved up into a smile, and my arms tightened around her. "I love you so much, Bella. Sometimes I wonder if it's possible to love someone as much as I love you. I'll do whatever I have to so you're happy. You don't have to thank me for that," I whispered. She eased into my chest and traced circles along my neck before she fell into a deep sleep.

The next morning we woke to Jasper and Alice calling out to us from the other side of the door.

"Come on you two, we're starving and want some breakfast. Get up, so we can go," Alice whined.

I groaned and tried to drown out the sound of her voice. Bella stirred and groaned as well but she started to pull herself up and go to the shower. I yelled back at Alice that we would be ready in a minute.

Once we checked out of the hotel, we all headed to a restaurant for a late breakfast. Alice and Jasper were of course in their own little world like they normally were and Emmett and Rose looked slightly hung over. I laughed internally at them. I held Bella's hand protectively under the table and rubbed my thumb across her knuckles occasionally. When I would glance in her direction she would smile and lean her head against my shoulder. When the waitress came we all ordered and I figured this would be a good time to get to know Rosalie a little better.

"So Rosalie, how did you and my brother meet?"

She glanced in his direction giving him a questioning look. "He hasn't told you?" she asked.

I shook my head. "He hasn't said much about you at all."

"Really… and why is that Emmett?" She questioned him accusingly. My brother was squirming in his seat and I was actually enjoying that it was him this time and not me.

"It just hasn't come up," he covered. I smirked and stifled a laugh. They both noticed though.

"We met at the garage I work at. He came in for a part for his Jeep and then continued to come in for parts I knew he didn't need, so I finally told him he either needed to ask me out or he needed to stop coming to the shop. He asked me out and we fell in love," she said jubilantly.

"Do you live in Forks then?" I asked.

"No, I live in Port Angeles. Although, I've been spending more and more time in Forks the last couple of weeks," she smiled and bumped into him lightly like they were sharing some little secret. It wasn't too hard to figure out what she meant by that though. Emmett blushed. I've never seen my brother blush. During high school he could have any girl he wanted and he did. He was never shy talking about his sex life during that time. Actually, he used to brag about it but I guess maybe things have changed now.

"I don't like it when he gets called out in the middle of the night to go protect another girl who thinks she saw a ghost though," she added. I had to take a cleansing breath before I said something I would regret. Bella tightened her grip on my hand or maybe I did on hers. I don't know which it was.

"Rose, it wasn't like that. I told you," Emmett said.

"Well, it doesn't make a girl feel loved when you run out on her in the middle of the night and don't come back," she alleged.

"You know for someone who's supposedly in love with my brother, you aren't very supportive of his occupation," I accused. "I'm sure you working on cars all day with a bunch of greasy, sweaty men, isn't the most appealing job for you to have in his eyes either. But I'm sure he supports you in it though.

"Who the hell are you to accuse me of that?" She shouted.

"I'm just stating the obvious. In the last three days since I met you, you've complained about his job twice. Being a police officer is a demanding job and takes a lot of dedication which my brother gives 100% to. But not only that, like he explained back at the house, he's protecting his family," I said in a raised voice. Everyone stared at the two of us with wide eyes and open mouths.

"She's not his family," she gestured to Bella and glared at me.

"She's my family, which by default makes her Emmett's family. If you can't handle that then I suggest you find someone else to bitch to."

'Whoa, hold on here. Why don't we all calm down and let this go," Emmett suggested. "Edward, I know you're just trying to stick up for me and I appreciate it but you need to stay out of it."

I sighed and slouched down in the booth. Bella leaned back next to me and I wrapped an arm around her shoulders pulling her to me. The rest of the day everyone was tense and the drive home was not much better. Every time we came to a stop, I could see Rose and Emmett shouting at each other in the rear view mirror. I felt bad for causing my brother to get into a fight with her but she was annoying the hell out of me with her snarky little comments and the snickering she was doing at Bella's expense. I didn't like her and I honest to God hoped Emmett wasn't serious about this girl.

When we pulled into the driveway at home there was an unfamiliar car parked in the driveway. I could tell Bella's anxiety was rising.

"Baby, it's probably just the recruits that Emmett told us about. There's nothing to worry about," I promised. She nodded her head and smiled. I opened her door for her and grabbed our bags. Emmett pulled in right behind us and yelled out for us to wait. I guess he was suspicious of the car as well so he wanted to call the house to be sure it was safe. Once he found out who it was he motioned us on but Rosalie stopped us before we could get to the door.

"I'm sorry for the way I acted," she apologized. "I was raised in that garage I work in by all those greasy men you mentioned, so sometimes I say stuff that I probably shouldn't. I understand why you got upset and I don't blame you for it. I do honestly care about your brother and support his career." My eyes narrowed trying to decide whether I thought she was being sincere or not. "Bella, I'm sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable." Bella offered a weak smile and I sighed in contempt at how easily Bella accepted her apology.

I rolled my eyes at Rose and reluctantly accepted her apology. She smiled and reached for Bella's hand with enthusiasm and started pulling her into the house without me. I thought I could hear her say something about how it would be nice to have a girl to talk to instead of all the guys at the shop. Personally, I didn't want this girl anywhere near Bella but as long as she behaved I guess it wouldn't be so bad for the two of them to get along. I walked back to Emmett who was still on the phone but closed it when I got close.

"So, whose car is this?" I asked. He took a deep breath and let it out raggedly.

"Just be strong and supportive," he recommended. I had no idea what he was talking about.

"What's going on?" I asked starting to worry that something bad may have happened.

"Just go in the house, you'll see," he said.

"Emmett if something's wrong, tell me now."

"Nothing's wrong, just go in the house."

I walked towards the steps at an uneven pace wondering what was happening. I walked into the living room behind Bella and placed my hand on her back. She turned back to me with wide eyes. I wanted to know what the fuck was going on. I searched the room and I saw my mom sitting there with some woman I didn't know, but my dad, Seth and Leah were gone.

"Edward, why don't you two come in and sit down," my mom suggested. I did as I was told and walked hand in hand with Bella sitting us down on the couch. Emmett said I needed to be supportive and strong. I got the impression that either Bella or I were going to need the support. I heard Emmett guiding Rosalie to the kitchen while she protested the entire time.

"Edward, Bella this is Kate Swan," she introduced. I heard Bella's voice hitch at the name. Swan, this had to be a relative I assumed.

"It's so nice to finally see you again, Bella. The last time I saw you, was when you were about 3 years old and still running around in diapers," Kate said.

"What's this about mom? And where's Seth, Leah and dad?"

"Your father went with Garrett to take Seth and Leah to get ice cream," my mom answered.

"It's nice to meet you too, Edward, I hear you are responsible for my nieces and nephew still being here," Kate said.

"I guess you could say that," I said shortly. She turned her attention back to Bella.

"Do you remember me at all Bella?" She asked.

"I remember my mom mentioning she had a sister a few times. There was a huge disagreement when you graduated from high school and she said you moved to Florida," Bella remembered. "She said that you both stopped talking after that.

"That's right, I regret that argument your mother and I had so much. I wish I could take it back somehow," she said sadly.

"Will someone mind telling us what this is all about?" I cut in.

"Edward, the case worker has been doing some digging into Bella's mom's files and it turns out that behind James' back she set up a will in case anything happened to her and it states that Kate would get full custody of the children," my mother explained. My heart felt like it was in my throat. I couldn't even breathe.

Just as I was about to protest against this Seth and Leah walked in with Garrett and my dad. They came rushing in to us excitedly to tell us all about riding in the police car with the sirens on.

There was an exchange of eye contact between Garrett and Kate briefly and it made me wonder if they knew each other somehow.

When Kate informed Seth and Leah of the will that Renee had set up years ago and what their fate was inevitably going to be, their excitement fell.

"Where does that leave me then?" Leah asked. We all stared at her blankly. "I'm not Renee's biological child. Where am I going?"

"Oh honey, you are just as much Renee's daughter and my niece as Bella is," Kate assured. "I would love for all three of you to come live with me in Florida."

"Florida," I shouted. "That's on the other side of the country. You can't do this."

"Edward, I know this is hard to take in," Kate said. I wanted her to shut up. She wasn't going to take Bella away from me. I wasn't going to let her. I promised her that wherever she was I would be too. Bella sat next to me holding my hand tightly staring down at the floor and never once saying a word. "I want Bella to decide what she wants to do. She's eighteen and old enough to make this decision on her own."

"Well, the answer is no, she's staying here with me," I replied.

"Edward, this isn't your choice to make," my dad reprimanded. "Bella has to decide for herself."

"I'll give you a day or two to think it over Bella," Kate offered. "I'm staying at the motel in town and I've left my numbers for you to reach me." With that she stood and gathered her coat shaking both my parent's hands.

"Garrett, it was nice to see you again," she said in passing while she headed to the door.

"It was good to see you too," he responded. "Let me walk you out." They obviously knew each other.

Emmett came into the living room and sat down on the arm of the couch.

"This may be a good thing," my father said. "With what happened the other night I think it would be good for Bella to put some distance between her and this town and the memories."

"I agree," my mom said. "I think all of you would be safer living with your aunt. Plus, she's family and I'm sure it would be nice to have that connection to your mom."

"It would make things easier for us, too," Emmett added. "There wouldn't be as many to have to keep an eye on."

"Will all of you just SHUT THE FUCK UP," I shouted. "This is ridiculous; I can't believe you're all sitting here trying to convince her that it's the right thing to do. It's not; she needs to stay here with me." I jumped up and went out the back door slamming it shut. I paced back and forth on the porch, pulling my hair and cursing them all for even suggesting she go to Florida.

"Edward," Emmett said softly. "Sit down, please." I glared at him for a second before I sat on the bench in a huff. "I know this is hard for you, but you have to let her decide what she wants to do. This is her aunt, a connection to her mom. You have to look at this rationally and understand where everyone else is coming from.

"I feel like I'm cursed, every time something good happens in my life something ten times worse comes in and knocks me back down. Everyone is trying to take her away from me," I said. He put his arm on my shoulder trying to comfort me.

"I know that's how you feel, but it's not true Edward. We only want what's best for her and you. You're my little brother and it's my job as your brother and as a police officer to keep you safe, I can't do that efficiently when I have to protect so many others in the process. You heard how upset Rose was about it. That's because my whole focus is on this family and keeping everyone safe. I hardly sleep at all and it doesn't help much for a personal life."

"So what, because you can't have a personal life that means my girlfriend should move across the country so you can?" I interrupted, angrier than before.

"That's not what I'm saying, it would just be easier for everyone else involved if they were somewhere safer, away from the threat of danger. James would never know where to find them. They would be safe. Isn't that what's most important? Isn't that what you want for her?" He asked.

Tears were burning my eyes. I knew he was right. "I love her so much though, Emmett," I sobbed. "I can't let her go." He pulled me into a brotherly hug and let me cry on his shoulder.

After a few minutes, I heard Bella's voice ask to talk to me. I sat up and wiped the tears away and sniffled. Emmett got up and went back in the house and Bella took his place next to me on the bench.

"Bella, you don't have to leave. You can stay here with me," I pleaded.

"I can't let Seth and Leah go live with someone they barely know," she explained.

"They'll be fine, they adjust easily. Look at how well they've done since being here?"

"Edward please, I don't want to fight about this," she begged. "Everyone's right, I'd be safer in Florida where James can't find me. You would be safer if everyone was looking out for just you and not all of us."

"Bella please, I can keep you safe. I'll protect you from everything forever. Please, just don't leave me."

"You can't protect me from everything, he's always going to be a threat in my life," she informed with tears in her eyes.

"Are you saying you don't trust me? I will protect you, Bella, I promise. I'd die for you if I have to."

"It's not that I don't trust you, I know you would do everything to protect me, but I can't protect you. That's what scares me. I'm not strong enough to keep you safe. The only way for me to do that is to leave. I don't want to live like this anymore. I want to feel free from him," she cried. "Please don't make this harder than it already is."

My chest hurt, I felt like I couldn't breathe. She was serious and had made up her mind. There was no convincing her differently. I jumped off the bench and stormed back into the house heading downstairs and slammed the door.

I was angry and frustrated and most of all hurt. I paced my bedroom floor obsessively for a good hour trying to decide how to make this better, how to change things. But I couldn't come up with anything. My dad came down stairs informing me that dinner was ready but I didn't want food. All I wanted to do was sleep. I yelled at him to leave me alone and after that no one came down.

The next day, I didn't go to school, instead I chose to wallow in self-pity in my bed. I could hear everyone upstairs packing bags and boxes with their stuff.

I stayed in my room for two days and I knew the following day she was leaving. I couldn't let her leave thinking I was mad at her. This was hard for her too, I was sure. Around ten that night I finally got up the courage to face her and be strong for her and show her that I supported her decision. I walked up my stairs and saw my parents in the living room. Both their heads jerked up when they saw me.

"I'm going to spend the night with Bella," I informed them matter-of-factly.

"Edward," my mom warned.

"You're making her leave tomorrow, I'm spending my last night with her and I don't care what you say," I shouted.

I ran up the stairs to her room. I couldn't get to her soon enough. I burst open the door and there she was lying on her bed crying. She sat up when she saw me and wiped her tears away. I shut the door and locked it and crawled up on the bed taking her in my arms.

"I'm sorry Edward, I'm so sorry," she cried.

"You don't have anything to be sorry for, I should be the one that's sorry. I should have supported you and trusted your decision."

"We can write, and call each other. My aunt said she'd get me a cell phone so I can call you anytime I want. And there's always the computer too. We can do the web cam thing." She named off all the things we can do to keep in touch and I shook my head in agreement but I knew it wouldn't be the same.

We spent the entire night just staring into each other's eyes. I brushed my fingers against every curve of her face and memorized every freckle across her nose. I didn't want to forget anything.

In the morning, when my mom knocked on the door informing us that Kate was here to pick them up to head to the airport, that ache in my chest came back, but I fought it down and tried to stay strong for her. She needed me to stay strong so she could be strong.

After she got dressed and grabbed her last few items to be packed away, we went down stairs hand in hand as my dad and Emmett loaded the car with their luggage.

I walked her outside and stood by the car giving both Seth and Leah a hug goodbye. They looked just as sad as Bella did but no one seemed to care.

Alice and Jasper came by to tell her goodbye also and Alice was blubbering like a baby. They both hugged her goodbye and Jasper tried his best to comfort Alice.

Bella looked up at me through her eyelashes. She was trying as hard as I was to not cry. I pulled her into my arms and held her tightly for as long as I could. Kate interrupted, saying they really needed to get going to make their flight.

I tried to hold back the tears, but they were coming whether I wanted them to or not. I kissed her once on the lips, then the forehead.

"I love you," I sobbed.

"I love you too. I'll call you as soon as we land," she promised.

I looked down at her and forced a smile nodding my head in agreement. "I'll be waiting by the phone."

She leaned up kissing me briefly once more, before she got into the car. I held her hand through the open window until the car pulled away and faded out of sight. I was breathing so hard and everything went blurry. The next thing I knew I hit the pavement.


	18. Chapter 17

A/N: Okay first I have to apologize for making everyone upset. I knew it was going to happen but wow. I enjoyed reading the reviews though and honestly every time I get reviews as descriptive and full of insight as I did with this last chapter it helps the characters in my head have a direction in where they want to go. Every chapter for this story is already outlined but sometimes to make it all fit together and flow correctly is hard to do but the reviews always seem to help me get the flow back so thank you so much to everyone who's been reviewing. I appreciate all the feed back.

This chapter is EPOV and the next chapter will be BPOV. I'll try to get that one up as soon as possible. I promise though they aren't going to be apart for long so please no one throw your computers like I know so many of us did with New Moon book. As for Kate and Garrett's connection to the story, I know you are all wondering about it and you'll get a little hint in this chapter but you'll get more of the story next chapter, promise.

Thank you Bzeemomof4 and Redlulu for being such great beta's you both are so quick to get it back to me and I appreciate you both taking the time to do this when I know you have busy lives.

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or its characters.

* * *

**Here Without You: 3 Doors Down**

A hundred days have made me older  
Since the last time that I saw your pretty face  
A thousand lies have made me colder  
And I don't think I can look at this the same  
But all the miles that separate  
Disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face

I'm here without you baby  
But you're still on my lonely mind  
I think about you baby  
And I dream about you all the time  
I'm here without you baby  
But you're still with me in my dreams  
And tonight it's only you and me

The miles just keep rollin'  
As the people leave their way to say hello  
I've heard this life is overrated  
But I hope that it gets better as we go

I'm here without you baby  
But you're still on my lonely mind  
I think about you baby  
And I dream about you all the time  
I'm here without you baby  
But you're still with me in my dreams  
And tonight girl its only you and me

Everything I know, and anywhere I go  
It gets hard but it wont take away my love  
And when the last one falls  
When it's all said and done  
It gets hard but it wont take away my love

I'm here without you baby  
But you're still on my lonely mind  
I think about you baby  
And I dream about you all the time  
I'm here without you baby  
But you're still with me in my dreams  
And tonight girl its only you and me

**EPOV**

I started to open my eyes slowly, trying to remember where I was and what happened. I remembered everything going blank and then hitting the ground. Then I remembered Bella leaving, my stomach tightened and I felt the urge to puke. I sucked in a ragged breath, opened my eyes completely only to see my mom sitting on the edge of the couch looking over me.

"You took quite the spill. Are you alright?" Was she kidding? I would never be alright again. She just made the girl I love leave.

I suddenly remembered her last words. She would call when she got there. I sat up abruptly. "Where's my phone? Did she call yet?" I said in a panic.

"It's only been four hours, she's most likely still in the air," she explained, I eased back into the couch and let out a sigh.

"What happened?"

"You passed out, more than likely because of your lack of food and sleep the last few days. I think you should eat something. I made you some soup."

"I'm not hungry, I just need my phone," I said.

"Edward, you need to eat." She almost sounded angry at me for not eating. She had no right to be mad at me. She caused this. She wanted her to leave. I wouldn't be surprised if she told the case worker to do the digging to find this long forgotten aunt. And who was this aunt anyway? Did we even know if she was safe, or if she would take care of them properly? How do we know she isn't connected to James somehow? They just let her go without even checking her out.

"Where's Emmett?" I ask, sitting up on the couch.

"He's outside with your father," she explained. "They're installing more security cameras and putting some heavy duty locks on all the windows and doors."

"So, what now they believe her? Now that she's gone," I accused.

"Edward, it's not that we didn't believe her when she said she saw him, it was just so unexpected and out of the blue. We didn't know what to think. But if he was here then it makes sense for all of them to be somewhere safer. And now your brother and the rest of the police can focus on protecting you and finding him."

"I don't need to be protected," I said angrily. I hopped up off the couch and ran down to my room to retrieve my phone then I took off outside to find Emmett.

He was on a ladder when I came outside and my dad was standing at the bottom holding it steady.

"Hey Edward, are you feeling better?" My dad asked, glancing in my direction.

"I'm fine," I replied coldly. "Are you almost done? I need to talk to Emmett."

"I'll be down in a minute," Emmett shouted. I sat on the steps by the front door because I was feeling a little light headed and waited. I kept looking at my phone obsessively, waiting for it to ring. I wanted to hear her voice. I wanted to know that she was okay. I wanted more than anything to see her.

After a few minutes, I saw my dad and Emmett coming around the corner of the house laughing about something. It pissed me off that they seemed so happy while I was miserable. I jumped to my feet so I could get Emmett's attention.

"I've got to go take a shower before heading to the hospital," my dad said. "I'll see you both later tonight." I didn't acknowledge him and waited for him to leave.

"Are you feeling better?" Emmett asked.

"No, not really," I answered. "I need to ask you some questions."

"What about Edward?" He came and sat down on the steps next to me, waiting for me to ask.

"This aunt of theirs… did you check her out? Where did she come from? Why did she show up all of a sudden without any announcement? Where has she been for the last fourteen years? Do we know if she's safe and not connected to James somehow?" I rambled every question I could think about without even stopping to get an answer.

"Hold on, Edward," he interrupted holding up his hands to stop me. "I know you're concerned but I assure you they are much safer with their aunt right now. I did run a background check on her. She lives in Florida right on the beach in a huge house. She's single and has a great job as an ad executive.

"But where's she been?" I asked again.

"You heard what she said. The last time her and Renee talked was when Bella was four years old. She didn't even know that Renee had died, let alone that she had another niece and nephew," he explained.

"Then how did she find out now? Did mom make the case worker search for any relatives to send her away?" I knew mom wasn't happy about me and Bella living in the same house and after the birth control appointment, I'm sure she probably suspects. But I really thought she was starting to like her and she seemed so happy to have Seth and Leah here.

"Edward, mom didn't have anything to do with it. I did," he clarified. I jumped up and stared at him with wide eyes.

"What!" I shouted. I started pacing back and forth. How could he do this to me? I never suspected it was him.

He let out a huge sigh and slouched. "Sit down and I'll explain things to you." I glared at him for a second. "Edward, you aren't going to understand unless you let me explain." I hesitantly sat back down on the steps, but continued to glare and flex my jaw in anger.

I waited for him to begin but he scratched his head and fidgeted a little, like he was trying to decide how to tell me whatever it was he wanted to say. "What I'm about to tell you is strictly between us. You don't say anything to mom or dad or anyone else. Especially not Bella," he began. I nodded my head in understanding. I realized this was probably serious. "James has been around." My breath caught in my lungs when he said it. "The other night was not the first time he's been seen. We got an anonymous tip that he was spotted coming and going from Heidi's apartment in Port Angeles . When we went to her place of work to question her about it, she said she had no idea what we were talking about and said that it's just her and her kids that live there. We felt like she wasn't being honest; so we were planning to watch the house and see what happens but when we started to leave, her boss pulled us aside and wanted us to know that she had begun coming to work with bruises on her arms and once she even had one on her face that she had covered up with make-up. That was enough to confirm what we thought so we brought in a social worker who convinced her to let us move her and her kids to a safer place. She was scared at first but she did it to protect her kids. She's given us a lot of information on what his intentions are. Port Angeles police have been waiting for him to come back to the apartment but he hasn't come back yet. He's smart, he knows when we get too close and makes sure to stay hidden."

"What are his intentions?" I wondered. He took a deep breath again and creased his forehead.

"He wants revenge. He's mad at Bella for telling you, and equally mad at you because he got caught. He blames you for taking his kids away and he wants them back. He has his police issued gun as well as a couple others according to Heidi. He's been using them to intimidate her and make her fearful for her and her children's lives. I have no doubt in my mind that he will use them if he needs to," he informed.

"We've had some people look into his past and find out as much information or contacts he may have and we're pretty sure he not only killed Bella's mom but killed Leah's as well. I guess the accident was suspicious to coroners and they suspected that she was actually dead before the car accident. But James took off and has been hiding up here before anyone could question him about it."

"I had planned to move everyone to a safer place for the time being. But Garrett remembered that they had an aunt so he did some digging and was able to find her and informed her of what was going on and what we needed from her. She hopped on a plane immediately to come and get them. The will, is a fake. Although, most likely she will be given custody since she is the closest living relative."

"Why did you need the fake will?" I asked. I was still stunned by all this information but that stood out to me.

"We needed to move them as soon as possible and without the will there was going to be tons of paperwork and meetings with case workers to determine what would be best for the kids. We didn't have that amount of time."

"The other night when Bella saw him outside the house, he _was_ here. I'm sure of it. That's why Garrett and I stayed through the night." I stared at him in disbelief. He noticed my expression. "Honestly Edward, if I thought it was just another one of Bella's dreams, I wouldn't have stayed considering Rose was back at my apartment waiting for me. I wouldn't have spent so much time installing more security cameras around the house and I wouldn't be planning to move back in here."

"Then why did you make it sound like he wasn't here? Why did you convince everyone that it was all in Bella's mind? Do have any idea what that did to her?" I shouted.

"I was trying to protect mom. I know your upset, but you need to realize that mom and dad… mom especially, are already on edge about everything. They aren't stupid they know you and Bella are having sex. Why do you think she took her to be put on birth control? She isn't having you both watched obsessively and calling me over to the house when they leave to make sure you don't do anything sexual. She's doing that because she's scared for all of you. If I had told her James was here, like I know he was, she would have been more panicked than she already is. Why do you think she looks so tired all the time? She barely sleeps, and dad told me that when he took her to Seattle for the New Year's party he thought it would help her relax but it only made things worse and she paced and didn't sleep much at all. She also called me repeatedly for an update. I'm surprised she didn't call you as well, but she doesn't want to scare you or Bella, even Seth and Leah. Honestly Edward, mom loves all three of them like they were her own and wants them to be safe but you will always be her main priority. That's why she thought it would be a good idea for them to go so quickly. Now she thinks that you are the only focus for us and you'll be safer."

"But how do we know James isn't going to find out they're in Florida and go after them there?"

"I've informed the police in Florida, they are fully aware of the situation and plan to keep us informed on anything suspicious. They have a much larger police force there and will be able to keep them safer than we ever could. Kate is also looking into a full time bodyguard to keep an eye on them. But we're all in agreement, that he's coming after you first. That's why he was looking through the basement window. Somehow he must have known you were down there. I don't think he had any intention of doing anything that night. If he did he would have done it. I think he was just scoping things out and making his plan. I don't think he'll do anything while mom and dad are in the house either. But we need to be ready."

"So you're using me as bate," I asked.

"In a way, yes, but that's why I'm moving back home so if he does try to get to you, I'll be ready," he further explained. All of this was too much to take in and I was confused by so much of it. The only thing that made sense to me was I missed her and wanted her back.

"You got yourself in quite the mess Edward and I understand why you did it. I would do the same thing for Rose if I had to, but I've said this many times. You're my brother and you're my first priority and I have to protect you before all others. I can't do that when I have to worry about keeping three other innocent kids safe too. This was the best thing for everyone. I know it's hard but I'm hoping it won't last forever."

I swallowed hard. I knew he was right. The best thing for all of them was to be safe far away from here. But that didn't stop the pain.

"About Rose, do you really love her?" I asked raising an eyebrow at him. I didn't want to talk about Bella anymore. If I did, I was threatening tears.

He laughed. "Yes, I do. I know she can be a handful and she doesn't think before she speaks most of the time but she is a really caring person."

"Well, you had to have told her what has been going on. Why was she so rude?" I asked.

"Like I said, she doesn't think before she speaks. She understands the situation but like most people she's in the dark about what's really going on here and it's hard on her when my whole focus is on this case. I never thought I would ever have to do anything to this magnitude in our little town and most of what we're doing we have no clue how to handle. I mean we get trained for this type of thing but you don't get what it entails unless you actually have to experience it."

"Are you going to be able to handle this?" I asked. As much as he was worried about me getting hurt, I was worried about him being hurt also.

"We'll be fine. We know what we're doing and we have the backup of the Port Angeles police, as well as a few volunteers from La Push," he assured.

"Will you promise to tell me everything and not keep it from me anymore?" I begged.

"As long as whatever I tell you stays between us, I will keep you informed on what's going on. But you have to promise to not worry mom or dad about anything. And don't say anything to Bella either. I know it's going to be hard to lie to her and keep things from her but I know that she has this need to protect you and if she thinks for one second that you might be in danger, she's going to try to find a way back here and she'd only end up putting both of you in more danger," he agreed. I nodded my head in understanding. As much as I wanted her with me, I didn't want to put her in any more danger either.

He put a hand on my shoulder trying to give me some sort of comfort but it didn't help. He stood up just as Sam and Garrett pulled into the driveway.

"What about Sam?" I asked. He never once mentioned Sam in any of this.

"What about him?" he countered.

"Well, you only mentioned you and Garrett in all of this. Is he not involved in the case?"

"Oh, he knows what's going on but he's older and he's not that interested in any of it. Really he's just counting down the days until he can retire. Right now Garrett and I are handling most of the case. We have him for the most part, continuing with his normal patrol on the highways," he explained.

"Well, why does Garrett take such an interest in this case? I mean, I get _your_ reasoning but he seems just as involved as you do." I stared out at them as they started to get out of the car.

"I don't think it's my place to tell you what Garrett's involvement stems from. If he chooses to tell you, it's up to him," he said quickly before darting down the steps to discuss police stuff with the other two men. I stood up and started my way back into the house. I was hungry and tired but nothing sounded good. I felt as if I even tried to eat, I would end up puking. I went to the fridge and decided to start with a little juice, then I grabbed a water bottle and headed upstairs. I figured with Emmett moving back home he would be staying down stairs, so I would get my old room back. I wanted it back anyway. It would remind me of her.

I opened the door and found my mom stripping the bed of the blankets and pulling pictures off the wall.

"What are you doing?" I shouted. She jumped and turned around.

"Edward, don't scare me like that," she pleaded grabbing her chest. I stared at her with wide eyes, waiting for her to answer. "Since your brother is moving back home for the time being, I thought I would clean up your old room so you can move your stuff back in. I thought it might be hard on you to do this yourself."

"No, I don't want you to move anything. I want everything exactly where it was. I don't want to change anything," I explained.

"Well, at least let me change the bedding, you don't want to sleep in purple blankets," she offered.

"Mom, I don't want you to change anything. Just get out," I shouted. She blinked her eyes and her mouth opened in shock. "Just stay out of here and leave stuff alone." I walked over to the bed and started putting the sheets back on the bed. She stood there watching me for a second, but finally retreated out, shutting the door quietly behind her. Once I had the bed fixed and the pictures back on the walls. I crawled into the blankets inhaling deeply. Everything still smelled like her- cinnamon and vanilla. I could almost feel her still wrapped in my arms, as we lay here just last night. I took my cell phone out of my pocket and laid it on the pillow next to me, staring at it and waiting for it to ring. After a while the exhaustion got to me and I fell asleep.

Later that night, I was awoken suddenly when my phone started ringing. I opened my eyes and everything came rushing back to me once again. I grabbed the phone, answered it without even glancing to see who it was. I prayed that it was her.

"Hello," I said exasperatedly.

"Hi," the soft, timid, voice on the other end said. I smiled and let out a sigh of relief.

"Hi, are you there already?"

"We just got here. It's late, but I promised I would call you and I wanted to hear your voice," she explained.

"You have no idea how good it is to hear your voice," I said, sitting up on the bed. "Are you alright, is everything going okay?" I inquired.

"Yeah, we got in really late. It's very warm here, it's nothing like Forks. On the plane, I got to know my aunt a little better and I really like her. She reminds me a lot of my mom."

"That's great," I said. I felt an instant tugging at my chest.

"She has a really nice house too; it's really big and right on the beach. She said tomorrow she'll take us down there so we can play in the sand and the water. It reminded me of that day back in November when you took us to the beach there." I sensed a hesitation in her voice. Something was wrong. "I miss you so much, Edward."

"Oh baby, you have no idea how much I miss you too," I agreed. "I just want you to be happy though. Don't worry about anything here. Enjoy yourself and make some new friends at your new school, okay. We'll be together again eventually. I promise you that. Once all this is over, we can be together again."

"I hope so," she said sadly. "I feel like I made the wrong choice. I keep wondering if maybe I should come home."

"Bella, please just stay with your aunt. Seth and Leah need you to be there for them."

"But I don't know how to survive without you," I could hear her voice cracking and I knew she was beginning to cry.

"You are the strongest person I know. You will survive, I know you can. I will too." I took a deep breath. "We can talk to each other on the phone and email back and forth, we can even send letters, just like you said last night. In fact, I'm going to send you something tomorrow."

"What are you sending?" She asked.

"You'll see when you get it."

I heard her yawn so I glanced over at the clock on my night stand. It was almost ten o'clock here which would make it almost one there. She was probably exhausted from the trip, especially since she didn't get much sleep last night.

"Why don't you get some sleep, we can talk again tomorrow," I suggested.

"Okay, I don't want to cause a large phone bill for my aunt either," she added.

"I'll call you as soon as I get out of school."

"Are you going to school tomorrow?" She asked.

"I don't want to but yes, I'll go," I answered.

"Okay," she said simply.

"I love you, so much, Bella," I said.

"I love you too. Goodnight Edward."

"Goodnight," I whispered.

After I hung up the phone, I rushed down stairs to the surprised faces of my parent's, Emmett and Rose. "Do we have a box?" I asked.

"How big of a box do you need?" My mom asked, with a questioning look.

"I don't know, like medium sized." I held out my hands trying to show the size of a box I needed. She got up and went into the laundry room and came back holding out a box. I wasn't sure if it would be big enough or not, but I accepted it anyway.

"What do you need the box for," Emmett asked.

"I'm sending some stuff to Bella," I said simply.

"Did you hear from her?" my mom asked.

"Yeah, I just got off the phone with her and I told her I'd send some stuff." Esme grabbed the box back from me.

"If you don't mind, I'd like to send some things for all of them as well. Can I get you a bigger box and add a few things?" I nodded my head in acceptance and she went back to the laundry room carrying out a box three times as big. "I can make sure it gets sent out tomorrow if you would like."

"I can do it," I disputed. 'After school, I'll go to the post office."

"Will you at least eat before you go off to gather up whatever it is you want to send?" She begged.

"Mom, I'm not hungry."

"You haven't eaten in days. You need to eat," she argued.

"Fine, can I at least get what I want to send first?" I compromised. She nodded her head and I took off down stairs to my old room. I noticed Emmett had already made himself at home. He had a suitcase and a couple boxes of stuff. I noticed a few things that appeared to be Rosalie's, so I got the impression that she was probably going to be spending a lot of time here. I decided since I was down here I might as well gather up all my stuff, so I threw all my clothes and anything else I could fit into my hamper and dragged it back upstairs. I hopped up on the bed and took down the Japanese symbol pictures and placed them on the bed. I wrapped them up in some newspaper and brought them down stairs placing them in the box. It already had many of the little nick-knack things that Seth and Leah had to leave behind. As well as some books and the X-box and games Seth had received for Christmas. I also placed a pocket watch, which belonged to my grandfather that Emmett had given me a few months ago, in there. I placed it with a note explaining that it was set to Forks time so she would always know what time it was here and that in some way we would be together. I know it was cheesy and probably stupid, but she would like it.

After eating as much as I could from the plate of food my mom saved for me, I went back up stairs and slipped on my football jersey she liked to wear and slept in it. It still smelled like her, but I was hoping by morning it would have enough of my smell. If I enjoyed her smell, I figured she'd like my smell.

The next morning, I stuck it in the box and saw that my mom had added even more things. Some of their favorite snacks and quite a few of the books they all enjoyed. The box was actually becoming very full. I gathered up the box to load in my car before heading off to school, when Esme came back once more with an arm load of stuff to be added. I was starting to believe Emmett when he said that my mom did actually care about all of them. She helped me tape it up and then Emmett helped carry it out to my car. Emmett followed me to school and waited until I was safely inside.

The day dragged on and everywhere I went, I was reminded of her; the empty seats in our classes, the empty chair in the cafeteria, the empty locker in the hall. I couldn't focus on anything. A few people, mainly Jasper and Alice, tried to talk to me and engage me in conversation and I tried but it was too hard. Even the girls who would get up the nerve to come talk to me, and there were a lot since they knew Bella had left, held no interest. Not that they ever did, but I didn't even acknowledge them like I normally did.

"Edward," I heard the most annoying of all the girls, in this school, call my name. I tried to ignore it and keep walking. "Edward, wait for me." I felt her hand grab my arm and pull at me. I huffed and rolled my eyes. "Why didn't you wait for me?"

"What the fuck do you want Jessica?" I asked coldly.

"What's gotten in to you?" She asked, irritated.

"I have to go to class, what do you want?"

"I was hoping we could talk. Maybe we could go to that French restaurant I love so much," she suggested.

"I don't think so Jessica," I replied. I tried to walk around her but she jumped in front of my path.

"Well, can you give me a ride home after school tonight?"

"No, I can't."

"Edward, she's gone. Good riddance too. Can we just talk things out and go back to the way things used to be? The prom is coming up in just a few months and you know we are both going to be crowned king and queen. It only makes sense for us to go together. Now please, give me a ride home after school so we can talk and work out the details for prom. I have a lot of planning to do," she begged. I laughed and raised an eyebrow at her.

"You actually think I would take you to prom after what you did to Bella? Are you fucking crazy? Seriously Jessica, if you fell off the face of the planet right now I wouldn't be happier. I don't want to listen to your whiney mouth ever again. I am so through with you and everyone else at this fucking school. You're a bitch Jessica and had no right to try to convince people that everything that has happened to Bella was planned by her and James, to get money. To even come up with something as ludicrous as that, is pathetic. Do you want to know why I can't give you a ride home or take you out? Besides the obvious hatred and distaste I have for you, I have a psycho killer who's after me and most likely will kill me and anyone else who gets in his way. That's why I have cops follow me around everywhere I go." I was shouting now and people in the halls were slowing to watch our exchange. She gaped at me and stared blankly at me. "Have a nice life, Jessica. Now leave me the fuck alone." I left her and everyone else enjoying the show and headed outside to sit in my car. I needed to get away from everyone and breathe. I ended up sitting in my car through most of last period. All I wanted to do was go to Bella.

Shortly before school got out, I started up my car and took off. I knew someone was probably on their way to escort me home but I needed some time alone. I drove to the post office first and sent off the package. The lady at the counter talked for hours it seemed about how scared she was for all of us and how it really hurts to know that someone so trustworthy could turn out to be so bad. I rolled my eyes behind her back many times and did everything in my power to not snap at her. Once I left, I drove around aimlessly.

I found myself parking in the exact spot in the woods where I first took Bella the day she skipped school with me. Her falling to the ground and curling up into a ball on the cold ground that day should have been my first clue that something wasn't right. There were always so many clues and it took me so long to figure it out. If I would have done better at noticing the clues and done something about it the minute I figured it out, things could be different. She could still be here. I wouldn't have someone following me around all the time.

I started up the car and headed home, knowing full well if I didn't show up soon they were going to be sending out search parties. When I got home Emmett was sitting in the driveway with an angry expression.

Before I could even get out of the car, he was yelling. "What the fuck Edward?" he shouted. I stood there silently leaning up against my car staring at the ground. "I told you everything yesterday, so you would understand the danger that you're in and let me keep you safe, not so you could take off and go who knows where. Do you have any idea how much risk you're taking by doing this? He's waiting for the opportunity to get you alone. That's what he's waiting for and you're playing right into his hands."

I looked up at him frowning, wondering if he was done.

"God Edward, do you want to get yourself killed? Do you have any idea what that would do to mom and dad? Have you even thought about how Bella would feel if she found out as soon she left, James was able to get to you? It would kill her."

"I don't want to go back to school," I said simply. "I don't want to go anywhere anymore. I just want to stay home."

"Okay, we can talk to mom about getting you set up to finish out school at home, I'm sure she wouldn't mind if you did that. I can set up a full time guard at the house while you're here. But from now on, Edward, you have to swear to me you won't take off like this again."

"Fine, I won't take off." I pushed myself from the car and headed up the steps to the house. I went straight to my room, kicked off my shoes and crawled into the bed. I took out my phone and called Bella, but there was no answer. I waited and waited for her to call back but she didn't.

The next morning, I didn't bother getting out of bed. My mom tried to bring me up some breakfast but I didn't touch it. She took the day off from work so she could coordinate me finishing out the school year at home, which took all day since I didn't see her again until late that afternoon when she brought up my books and packets of school work, as well as more food.

Later that night, Bella finally called and told me that she was meeting her new counselor yesterday and afterwards Kate took them out to dinner. She said that school was going fine. She made a new friend who lived just a few houses down from her and she was helping her find her way around. The school was 3 times the size of Forks and she was getting lost easily.

I was happy that she was settling in so quickly, but I couldn't get over how happy she sounded. Why was this so much easier for her? After I hung up with her, I spent the rest of the night working on the packet of schoolwork and got all of it done in a matter of hours.

My routine for the next few weeks consisted of waking, eating as much as I possibly could so as not to disappoint my mom, finishing the packets sent home every week in a day, calling Bella, and sleeping.

I started having these weird dreams about Bella, where it was dark and I could hear her but I couldn't find her. No matter how much I searched, I couldn't find her. It reminded me of the dream I had a few weeks after meeting Bella. I hadn't really thought about that dream since then, but now I was seeing the connection to when I did save her in the basement. If I would have only known what it meant at the time, maybe she would still be here now.

All I could think about was all the, what ifs; all the things I should have done differently. It was ripping me apart.

Emmett kept me informed on their tracking of James. He had apparently been spotted in Seattle a couple times but in Forks there hasn't been anything. That worried me because how did we know he was even still around and hadn't taken off to Florida? What if Emmett and everyone else were wrong? What if he wasn't after me?

But I was wrong, one day when I actually left the house for a small amount of time, I drove around just for something to do and I ended up stopping at the hospital. I parked in the same spot I always did when I would drop Bella off for work and laid my head back on the seat. I wasn't really sure why I was there or what I was doing, I just needed some familiarity. But as I sat there thinking I felt eyes on me so I started looking around to find out if someone was watching me. I figured it was the guard that followed me around everywhere but I was surprised when I saw James across the street in a car, glaring over at me. Our eyes connected for a second. I knew he was aware I had spotted him, but he made no effort to leave or come toward me. I got out of the car watching him the entire time and stood by the side of the car waiting and wondering what he would do. I guess in a way, I was challenging him to come after me and I knew it was stupid, but the sooner we got this over with, the better. Then I could have her back.

Unfortunately, a group of doctors walked out of the hospital and a few of them noticed me and came over to talk to me. I watched as James pulled out of the other parking lot and headed down the road. I was pretty sure he was laughing as he left. I headed home after that. I knew I should have told Emmett but I didn't. As much as Emmett wanted to protect me, I needed to protect him and everyone else I cared about. I caused this and this was between me and James. He was mad at me and wanted to hurt me, and the same went for me, so no one else should be involved.

At the beginning of March, almost eight weeks after she left, I was still a mess. I very rarely left the house. When friends call, I don't talk to them. When Emmett would try to get me out of the house for an afternoon of some fun, I refused. Mostly, all I did was sleep. When I sleep, I hear her voice and see her. Bella still continued to send me letters and call me almost every day and every call or letter I got, only made me more depressed. She was having fun and enjoying the warm weather and the beach. She was making some new friends and she even had a new job, working at a fast food restaurant. Every time I heard from her, she sounded so happy, while I was still miserable. It hurt to know that she was able to go on so easily without me. Why couldn't I be happy for her? Why did I feel so mad at the fact that she was finally learning to live without fear?

By mid-March, Jasper came by almost every day and sat in my room with me. Most times we wouldn't talk much, he would just sit there and do his homework. He also snuck in alcohol from time to time which was a nice distraction. On those nights, I would talk to him and laugh at his jokes and have a good time. But by morning, all the pain I felt came right back. On more than one occasion he brought over Alice and every time we would get into a shouting match, over how I was acting or how I was beginning to ignore Bella.

I didn't want to ignore her, but every time I talked to her the pain I felt only got worse. I just wanted it to go away and get back to normal.

One Friday evening, my mom came up to try and get me to join them for dinner. Emmett and Rosalie were both downstairs and they had invited Jasper and Alice over as well. I knew they were all only trying to help but I wasn't in the mood for company.

"Mom, please, I don't want to see anyone," I begged.

"Edward, you've been up in this room for months now. You never do anything anymore and frankly it's scaring the hell out of me and your father. This isn't normal. You need to start living again," she argued.

"I'm living the best way I can, mom. I can't be normal right now when I'm not completely here. I only end up making everyone who's around me mad or depressed and I don't want to do that."

She sat down on the edge and pulled me into a hug. "I know you miss her, I miss her too. I miss all of them. But there isn't anything we can do to change this and we have to go on."

"I don't want to go on without her. I need her mom. She makes me whole, she makes me feel alive and right now I feel dead inside." The tears were beginning to burn my eyes and my voice was shaking.

"Do you think Bella wants you to be this way?" She asked. I pulled away from her and stared at her with narrowed eyes. "Edward, I know you love her but you have to go on for her. You can't bring her down with you. Maybe this separation was a good thing. I think you both depend on each other too much and you need to start living for yourselves. If in the future things get better and you're both meant to be together, it will work out. But you can't give up life waiting for that time to come. You have to continue living. I know it's hard, but you have to."

understood what she was saying, but it didn't make me feel any better or make me want to do it. I nodded my head to let her know I understood. "We are all so worried about you. We don't like seeing you this way." She hesitated, waiting for me to say something, maybe. But when I didn't, she patted my knee. "We'll be down stairs if you would like to join us."

I sat in my room for a long time, thinking about what she said and even though it was hard, I finally got up and went down stairs. I knew I was hurting everyone else by the way I was acting, so I tried to give them some glimpse of hope by joining them for dinner. It wouldn't make me feel any better but it would make them feel better. So I did it.

"God, Edward, you look like shit," Rosalie said as I stepped into the dining room. I heard Emmett scold her for her rudeness and I saw everyone else at the table shoot her dirty looks. I ignored her. I hadn't known her long and I avoided her as much as possible, but one thing I knew was it was best to just ignore whatever came out of her mouth.

"I'm sorry, but I haven't seen him in days and he looks sicker than the last time I saw him," she tried to apologize.

"Rose, let's just drop it and enjoy the fact that he's joining us," my dad suggested. She shut up after that and I got the impression that my dad intimidated her. I smiled internally at that fact. I didn't think anything could scare her.

We all ate in silence. Occasionally, someone would try to engage conversation, but it would fizzle out and the only sound you would here was forks scraping across the plates. For some strange reason that sound was a comfort to me. I barely touched my food and mostly just pushed things around on my plate. I know my mom noticed. I could feel her eyes burning a hole through me.

Once I was done eating as much as I could, I went up to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. Rose was right, I did look like shit, my eyes were sunken and dark, and my cheeks were sucked in. I was paler than usual and my lips were severely chapped. I hadn't shaved in weeks and I had quite the beard growing. My hair was greasy and more unruly than usual. I could tell I had lost weight and muscle mass. I looked ghastly. No wonder everyone was worried about me.

I took a shower and tried to make myself look a little more appropriate. Then I went back to my room and crawled back into bed. The sheets no longer smelled like her, but they gave me some sense of comfort.

The next day Emmett tried to convince me to come out with him and Rose, to go bowling but I refused, not only because I didn't want to be around Rose, but also I had no interest in having fun.

Later that day, Bella called my cell phone but I didn't answer. It was too hard to talk to her anymore, too hard to do anything.

A few minutes after my phone stopped ringing, there was a knock on my door and Emmett stepped in holding out the house phone for me. "It's Bella, she said she called your cell phone but you didn't answer."

"I don't want to talk to her right now. Tell her I'm busy," I insisted.

I heard him step out into the hall and I could hear his muffled voice tell her I was taking a shower and that I would call her back. I had no intention of calling her back. Once he was done, he stepped back into my room. I laid there and stared at my ceiling.

"Edward, what is wrong with you? You've been ignoring her for weeks now. You have a stack of letters from her that are still unopened. I'm sure your email inbox is the same way. Why are you avoiding her?"

"What's the point Emmett? I'm never going to see her again. She's found happiness in Florida. She chose Florida over me and I'm not going to come between that. She deserves to be happy and safe. I obviously couldn't give her that, so she left me. It's too hard to talk to her and try to be happy for her so I'm trying to let her go," I reasoned.

"Are you out of your mind?" He questioned in an angry tone. I glanced over at him with wide eyes. "Do you have any idea how many times she calls me and wants to know what's going on with you and whether or not I'm taking care of you? She talks to Rose quite a bit now, as well as Alice. She's just as miserable as you are, but she's dealing with it differently. She's trying to pretend to be happy on the phone and in her letters, because she thinks it's what you want. She didn't choose Florida over you. She chose her family, her brother and sister. The two people she has been a mother to for so long. She chose to leave, so you could be safe. How could you think she left because she wanted to be in Florida?"

"Well, what do you want me to do? Every time I talk to her it hurts more. I can't live like this."

"Stop acting like she's dead and start living again for her. Stop acting like a fucking self-centered, jack ass and be there for her. I know it hurts Edward, but you're hurting her more by ignoring her. Is that what your intention is? To hurt her so she'll forget about you?"

"Well, you keep telling me that James is after us, so wouldn't it make more sense to not have any contact with her? James is probably watching our mail and probably knows where she is by now. Did you ever think about that? Have you even been looking for him? You haven't given me any updates lately. Are you giving up on finding him? Are you even doing your fucking job, Emmett? Maybe we would be together again if you would actually stop worrying about your fucking personal life and do your job. Maybe, I should do your job for you. I never seem to have a problem finding James when I go out. He's always there watching every move I make and every time I challenge him to come after me so we can just get this over with, he laughs and drives away." He stared at me with a blank expression. I could actually see the blood running from his face. "Did I forget to tell you that? I think maybe I did. Yeah, I saw James. He was watching me in the parking lot at the hospital one day when I snuck off. Your little guard that you hired to watch me isn't that great. He's easy to get around. If I can get around him I'm sure James can too."

"Why didn't you tell me this?"

"Why should I? You aren't going to do anything. You've been chasing him around for months and still there's nothing. No leads, no idea where he is or what his next move will be. But you and everyone else, goes on living, while I sit here and waste away."

"Edward, I know you're mad and you're taking you anger out on me. I won't hold that against you. I know you blame me for all of this and I'm sorry for that, but I'm doing the best I can. If I knew where James was, I would go get him and put him away for the rest of his life. If I could, I would send you down there to Florida right now so you could be with her. But what good would that do anyone? We still wouldn't be any closer to finding him. Once this is all over, I promise Edward, you'll be together again. I'll make sure of it. But in the meantime, if you truly love her, don't ignore her and give up on her. She needs you more than you can imagine Edward. And I think you need her too."

I huffed and turned away from him. I didn't want to talk to him anymore. I heard him sigh and whisper "sorry" before he left my room.

I laid there all night thinking about what he said and realized how right he was. I was being a jerk to her and hurting her more by avoiding her. But after what I've been doing would she even accept my phone calls now? If I could just see her and explain to her how hard all of this has been for me, maybe she would understand. I needed to see her. I couldn't live like this. I wasn't going to do this anymore and if James wanted to get me then he better do it now, because I'm not waiting any longer. I loved her more than anything. That would never change. I wasn't going to be separated from her, ever again.

I hopped up around two in the morning and grabbed my backpack. I threw in some clothes, my Ipod, my wallet, and my phone. I snuck down stairs and got in my car, taking off as fast as I could, before getting noticed. I sped across the highway as fast as I could go, until I reached the airport. I bought a ticket for the first available flight to anywhere. I would buy a ticket to Florida once I landed wherever I was headed now. Once I was on the plane, I waited nervously for it to take off. I was sure at any minute Emmett was going to come on and drag me out but he didn't and as the plane took off I felt a sudden rush of relief.

I was going to see her in just a few hours and we could be together again. I just hoped she would forgive me.


	19. Chapter 18

**A/N: I got some amazing reviews last chapter so I just wanted to say thanks for those. Everytime I read a new one it gives me so much more confidence in my writing. All of you are awesome. I'm sure after this chapter everyone will be very anxious for the next chapter so I promise I will get it up ASAP. It's already started and hopefuly won't take too long for me to finish. Time is my biggest obsticle but I pull all-nighters on occasion to get them done so I will do that again if I have too.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or its characters.**

* * *

**Never Alone: Barlow Girl**

I waited for you today  
But You didn't show  
.No.  
I needed you today  
So where did you go?  
You told me to call  
you said you'd be there  
And though I haven't seen You  
Are You still there?

Chorus  
I cried out with no reply and  
I can't feel You by my side  
So I'll hold tight to what I know  
You're here and I'm never alone.

And though I can not see you  
and I can't explain why.  
Such a deep, deep reassurance  
You've placed in my life oh  
We cannot separate  
'Cause you're part of me  
and though you're invisible  
I'll trust the unseen

Chorus  
I cried out with no reply  
And I can't feel you by my side  
So I'll hold tight to what I know  
You're here and I'm never alone

We cannot separate  
You're part of me  
and though you're invisible  
I'll trust the unseen

Chorus  
I cried out with no reply  
and I can't feel You by my side  
So I'll hold tight to what I know  
You're here and I'm never alone

**BPOV**

When we arrived in Florida , I was suddenly bombarded with the fact that I left him. We were apart and I had no idea how long it would be until I saw him again. What did I do? I couldn't believe I left just like that. I felt lost without him. I wanted to turn back around and get back on that plane and go home. But I knew I couldn't, so somehow I had to accept what I had done.

When we got to my aunt's house, I was shocked at how big it was considering she was single. But she said she fell in love with this house the minute she saw it and bought it instantly.

I liked my aunt; she was spontaneous and adventurous just like my mom was; before she met James. I didn't know much about her and I didn't dare ask her any questions, but I was observant and noticed little things about her that reminded me of my mom.

Inside her house it was very clean and proper. I was scared to touch anything. But she told us that this was our home now and to make ourselves comfortable. She showed us to our rooms and when I first walked in, I almost cried. It was plain and simple, impersonal. It's not like I expected her to decorate and have the rooms set up for us like Edward and Esme had when we moved in there. But it felt like I was back in my room with James. It reminded me even more how much I was alone.

Seth and Leah were both extremely tired and went to bed right away, but I wanted to call Edward. Kate said I could bring the phone in my room to have some privacy, so I plopped down on the bed and called him. I told him how different it was here and how much I missed him. When I told him I thought I had made a mistake, I expected or maybe hoped that he would agree with me and tell me to come home. But he didn't and part of me was hurt by that; I was sure he would want me to come home. But maybe he wanted me to leave. Maybe he was tired of taking care of me and always watching over me. Maybe he was tired of always being in danger because of me.

I cried myself to sleep that night and the next morning Kate pointed out the red, blistery splotches, across my cheeks. I didn't elaborate on why I looked the way I did, but I had a feeling she knew why.

After we were all ready for the day, Kate took us to our new schools to get us enrolled and acquainted with the area. Then we did some shopping. She told us to pick put anything we wanted for our rooms. We wandered around the store looking at lamps, furniture and bedding but we didn't really pick much out. When I came across a wall hanging of some of those Japanese symbols, my eyes welled up with tears. I ran my fingers across the symbol remembering the ones Edward gave me and I had to leave them behind because they wouldn't fit in the suit case, but I desperately wished I would have figured out a way to bring them. I longed for something familiar in this strange, new place.

"Do you like Japanese art?" Kate asked, coming up behind me. I jerked my hand back instinctively.

"Kind of," I answered.

"Well, if you'd like to decorate your room in a Japanese theme, I'd be happy to help you," she offered.

"No, that's not what I want." I knew what I wanted. I wanted my room at the Cullen's house. I wanted Edwards's room. I walked away from her and headed towards Seth who was picking out some super hero themed bedding.

"That's nice Seth. Are you thinking of doing super heroes?" I asked.

"I think it's what I want. Do you think it will be okay with Aunt Kate?" He asked.

"I'm sure she'll be fine with it," I answered.

"Bella," he said in a saddened voice. "Do you think we'll ever go home?"

"I don't think so. This is our home now."

"But, I miss Edward, and I know you do too. And I miss Emmett and Carlisle and Esme. I miss my school too."

"Seth, I know it's different and it's bigger, but Aunt Kate's nice and I think we'll be happy here," I said optimistically. "We can see the Cullen's again, someday."

"You promise?" he begged.

"I'll make sure of it, somehow."

"Oh, Seth this is an excellent choice," Kate expressed, coming up behind us. We both turned to look at her briefly before looking away again.

"Have you decided what you want Bella?" She asked.

"I'll just take the plain blue bedding over there."

"That's a nice choice."

"What about you, Leah?" She asked, while Leah came walking up behind us. She had a scowl on her face and her arms across her chest. She'd been that way since we were told that we had to move, but she wouldn't talk to me and tell me why.

"I don't care what I have. The bedding I have now is just fine," she responded.

I looked at Kate and saw a look of worry and panic come across her face. Then she sighed exasperatedly. She was trying to get to know us and help us, but we weren't letting her. We were still very detached and I wasn't sure if that would ever change. We didn't know anything about her and she didn't know anything about us, yet now all of a sudden she has to take on the parent roll of three kids. I actually felt a little sorry for her.

After we picked out what we wanted for our bedrooms, she took us clothes shopping. Most of our clothing was for cold weather and here it's warm almost all year long. So she wanted us to have appropriate clothing. Leah was still acting very cold to everyone, especially Kate, and barely picked out anything. I ended up picking out most of her stuff since she wouldn't.

When we left the mall, we were all very exhausted and I thought we would be going back to the house but instead Kate took us to meet with our new counselor she had set up for us. We were all very surprised and I almost felt mad at the fact she wasn't giving us any time to adjust before thrusting us back into counseling. Thankfully though, it was a short meeting and more of just a meet and greet than anything too intense. I didn't like her much. Her name was Siobhan and she had an unusual accent that was hard to understand at times. She was very impersonal and cold towards us. I got the impression that she didn't enjoy her job. The last fifteen minutes of the session, we sat in the waiting room with the secretary, while Aunt Kate talked with the counselor privately.

When she came out of the room, Siobhan gave her a light pat on the shoulder and a comforting smile. I figured Kate had talked to her about how we had been acting and wanted to know what she could do to get through to us, but she never told us if that's what it was.

Once we left, Kate asked if we would like to get some dinner before heading home. Honestly, I think all of us just wanted to go back and relax, but she took our silence as a yes and pulled into a parking lot in front of a Chuck E. Cheese restaurant. Seth's eyes lit up as we walked in, but Leah and I gave each other a look of irritation. Did she think we were all little kids still?

She ordered a pizza and some drinks, then we found a table and she handed all of us some tokens to go play games. We all stood up and walked around. I pretty much just followed Seth around to keep an eye on him and give him more tokens as he ran out. Leah, I noticed played a few games, but didn't have much interest in anything. Eventually, she came over to us and handed Seth the remainder of tokens. She walked over to the wall and leaned back against it with a frown on her face.

When Seth was done with his playing, I motioned for Leah and we all walked back to the table. Kate was on the phone when we slid back into the booth. She looked tense and frustrated. I was worried immediately. What if it was from back home?

"Who was that?" I inquired.

"It was nothing, just work." She tucked a strand of her blonde hair behind her ear and grabbed for her cup, taking a long drink of her soda. I had a feeling she wasn't telling me the truth, but I figured if anything was wrong Edward would tell me later when he called.

We sat in complete silence and didn't eat much either. "Look," Kate started. Making us all jump slightly. "I know this is all new to you and we don't know each other very well, but you're my nieces and my nephew and I want this to work. I don't have a lot of experience with kids and this is going to be a learning process for all of us. But I'm hoping all of you will learn to trust me and give me a chance. I understand why you're being distant and keeping to yourselves but I'm not going to hurt any of you like he did."

We all stared at her as she spoke and when she was done we glanced between each other. None of us said anything.

"Are you done eating?" She asked frustrated. "We should get home and get everything put away." She stood up and grabbed her purse gesturing for us to follow.

Once we were home, we went upstairs to unload everything while Kate went into her office on the first floor. After I was done, I checked the phone hoping that Edward had called, but he hadn't. I thought about calling him but decided against it since I was still using Kate's house phone and didn't want to have a large phone bill for her to pay. He said he would call when he got home, so I'll just wait. I went and took a long shower, trying to relax, but it wasn't helping much.

Afterwards, I went down stairs and saw Kate sitting at a bar stool in the kitchen. She looked upset and almost like maybe she was crying. I got really worried that something was wrong.

"Aunt Kate," I motioned, nervously. She sat up and started rubbing her eyes. "Is something wrong?"

"No, everything's fine," she said with a forced smile.

"Then why were you crying?" I asked.

"It's nothing, really. I just don't know what I'm doing and I feel like I've take on more than I can handle."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know how to take care of three kids. I don't know anything about any of you or what to do to get all of you to like me. I have so much guilt because I didn't know any of you over the years and I feel like I'm letting my sister down."

"You're doing as well as you can. I know we aren't adjusting very well, but we've only been here for a day. We need time to figure everything out. We've lived in Forks all of our lives and they weren't very good lives to begin with, but we'll be fine here."

"Thanks Bella, I know I'm probably acting like a nutcase right now, but honestly I never thought this would happen. As far as I knew, Renee was still back in Forks raising you. I did hear that she was getting re-married, but that was the last time I heard from her. I didn't want to hear from her after I got that announcement."

"Why? What happened that you both stopped talking to each other?" I asked. I was so curious to know more about what happened, but she wouldn't tell me. She brushed it off as nothing important and headed for the fridge taking out a bottle of wine and began pouring herself a glass. I watched her intently trying to remember anything about her from when I was a kid. I must have been around when this big argument between them happened, so maybe I could remember why. I felt like it was important somehow."

She drank a large amount of the wine from her glass before she noticed I was staring. I ducked my head realizing that I may have made her mad.

"Edward called while you were in the shower," she informed. I felt a rush of joy go through me.

"What did he say?" I asked.

"I didn't talk to him. I was on my cell phone at the time, so I just let it ring."

"Oh," I said sadly. "Is it okay if I use the phone then?"

"Of course it is. You can use it anytime you want," she offered.

"Thank you." I hopped off the stool and grabbed the phone before I started to run up the stairs. When I got to my room though, I could hear a banging noise coming from down the hall.

I walked towards the sound and realized it was coming from Leah's room. I knocked on the door and walked in before she gave me permission. She was standing in the closet throwing every piece of clothing she had at the wall. Occasionally she would pick up a book and throw that as well. I stood there gaping at her, trying to make sense of what she was doing.

"Leah, are you okay?" I asked.

"No, I'm not okay," she answered angrily.

"What are you doing?" I asked, walking closer to her.

"I'm packing my stuff."

"Why, where are you going?"

"I'm going home, I'll hitchhike if I have to," she answered matter-of-factly.

"Leah, we don't have a home. This is the closest thing we have to a home now. This is what mom wanted." I tried to reason with her.

"She wasn't my mom. My mom died long before yours ever did. I don't want to be here anymore. Why did you make us come here?" She asked, tears beginning to stain her eyes.

"Leah, we didn't have a choice. Mom had a will that said this is where we were supposed to go."

"Why did they give you a choice then? Why didn't I get a choice where I wanted to live? I want to go home to the Cullen's. That's home to me, they were nice and kept us safe. Esme was like a mother to me and I don't want to lose another mother." She was crying now, but still continued to throw stuff.

"Leah, please just stop for a minute," I begged.

"Why did they make us come here?" She screamed. "Why didn't they want us to stay? Why doesn't anyone ever want me?" She collapsed on the floor sobbing uncontrollably. I couldn't help my own tears from falling. I walked closer to her and sat down on the ground next to her, wrapping my arms around her shoulders.

"That's not what happened, Leah. They didn't have a choice in sending us."

"You could have fought it. They gave you the choice of whether or not to go and you never asked me or Seth what we wanted. You made that decision for us. Why did you do that? We used to make decisions together when we lived with James, so we could stick together and keep each other safe. Why did you change and not ask us what we wanted? Seth doesn't want to be here. I don't think Kate wants us here either."

"I'm sorry, I should have asked you. But you didn't see him, Leah, he was staring right at me through the window and he could have hurt us like before. I'm just trying to keep us all safe. There was too much for the Forks police to do when we were there. Being here is better for us, so he can't get to us."

"And what makes you so sure he's not going to follow us? It wouldn't be that hard to figure out where we went." I had never really thought about that possibility but now I was starting to wonder about it.

"We'll be safer here." It was the only thing I could say and the only thing that I hoped made sense.

"I just want to go home," she sobbed into my shoulder.

"I know I do too. But we have to make the best of this situation. Aunt Kate is trying to be a good aunt and we need to try too," I pleaded.

She didn't say anything, but it felt like maybe she was nodding her head, letting me know she would try. We sat there and cried for a while before she finally pulled away and started picking things off the floor and putting them back in her closet. I spent the next hour helping her and making sure she was okay.

Once we were done, she climbed into bed. I sat with her for a little while brushing her hair with my fingers until she fell into a deep sleep. When I left her room I went and checked on Seth who was fast asleep, curled up in a ball.

I went back to my room and collapsed on my bed. It was late and I was exhausted. I felt horrible too. I should have talked to Seth and Leah about this before we left. I knew there wasn't any way around the will. They would have had to come regardless, but I could have explained things and made sure they understood why we were leaving and what was happening. We had so many changes happen in the last few months and I'm sure it was hard on them.

I suddenly remembered that I hadn't called Edward yet, but I was too upset to talk to him and I knew I would break down if I did which would only result in him getting upset because there was nothing he could do, so I chose not to call him.

Tomorrow would be better.

The next morning was our first day of school and we were all nervous. Kate cooked this huge breakfast for us, but she wasn't that great of a cook, so we barely touched it. She drove us to the elementary school and we all went in with Seth to get him settled into his new classroom. Then she dropped Leah off at the middle school. Leah refused to have either of us come in with her. She was still very upset and I could tell she was going into survival mode. I think we all were.

Kate pulled up in front of the high school and I took a deep breath before slipping out of the car door.

"If you need anything just call me," Kate offered. I nodded my head and shut the door.

I started to head up the sidewalk toward the main doors. I remembered the office was just inside from when we were here yesterday, so I went straight there. I noticed people staring at me and I felt really self conscious. I didn't like when people noticed me and before I always had Edward with me, so he blocked it out somehow. Here I was all alone.

I got my schedule and a map from the front desk and started wandering around the halls trying to make sense of the school. It was huge and there were people everywhere. I bumped into so many people and I apologized every time, but they just looked at me like it was no big deal. Maybe it was normal to be run into in a school this size.

My first class was Biology and once I finally found the classroom, I was given a book and assigned a seat next to a girl with really long dark hair.

"Hi, I'm Emily," she greeted. "Are you a new student?"

"Um… hi, yes I'm Bella. We moved here from Washington."

"Wow, that's quite the move. Why did you have to move so far?"

"We had to come live with my aunt. She lives here," I replied.

"Oh," she said, sounding a little confused since I didn't explain more. "I moved here last year. I was scared to death on my first day. I got lost at least a dozen times. I'd be happy to show you around if you'd like?"

I smiled and thanked her for her offer. I was glad someone was willing to help me out. She helped me find each of my classrooms for the day and introduced me to some of her friends at lunch. All of her friends seemed so nice and helpful. I didn't engage in much conversation with any of them, but I listened, trying to understand more about the people I would be going to school with for a few more months.

When Kate came and picked me up she already had Seth and Leah with her. She decided that it would be a good day to go down on the beach, so once we got home we headed down to the sand. It was so much different from back home. The sand had a different texture and the water wasn't freezing. Seth ran up and down the beach while Leah and I sat in the sun with Kate and watched. Leah seemed to be doing a little better today. At least she was talking to Kate. Kate seemed to be doing better too. She wasn't as tense as she was yesterday.

After I insisted on making dinner for us, I called Edward.

"Hello," he answered. He sounded tired.

"Hi Edward," I greeted.

"Hey," he answered back. "Where were you yesterday?"

"Oh, I'm sorry. Kate took us to meet our new counselor and afterwards she took us out to dinner. We didn't get home until really late and I was exhausted anyway, so I just went to bed. I'm sorry." I lied about what really happened. I knew if he knew the truth he would be upset.

"That's okay, I understand. It's probably a good thing that you got some rest since you started school today. How was it by the way?" He asked.

"It was fine. The school is huge, but I met a girl named Emily in my first period class and she showed me around for the rest of the day. It turns out she doesn't live that far from me either."

"That's great. I'm glad it went well." He sounded distant.

"How did your day go?" I asked.

"It was fine, same routine as always."

I hesitated. I wasn't sure what else to say. He didn't say much either. I felt like maybe he didn't want to talk to me.

"Well, I have quite a bit of homework to do tonight, so I better go," I stuttered. I was hoping he would tell me that he didn't want me to hang up yet. I wanted him to stay on the phone as long as possible but not if he didn't want to talk to me.

"Alright, I have some stuff to do too, so I'll talk to you tomorrow maybe." My heart sunk when he said it. He was pulling away, I could feel it. I held back the tears long enough to say goodbye, then cried myself to sleep once again.

The rest of the week went by so fast and I barely noticed anything. We were all getting into a nice routine and figuring each other out. Kate didn't look as stressed anymore and Leah was starting to adjust. Seth was just his normal happy self.

When a package arrived from Edward, I was shocked at how big it was. Kate and I both had to carry it into the house. Once I opened it up and saw all the things inside, I got a huge smile on my face. I knew Esme had to have added to this. Seth and Leah instantly started grabbing for stuff they recognized. When we got to the bottom there was Edward's old jersey from football in there. I instantly grabbed it and pulled it to my nose. It still smelled like him and I was overjoyed to have it. He also sent me an old pocket watch that had a note attached explaining that it was his grandfathers and had been passed down through the years. He wanted it to stay set to Forks time so then we would always be together. It was the sweetest thing ever and I treasured it. It reminded me of the locket he gave me and my hand instinctively went to my neck to touch it. I loved sentimental things like this from him. He always knew how to make me feel better.

At the bottom of the box were some things wrapped in newspaper. I pulled one out and began to unwrap it. I was ecstatic when I saw they were my Japanese symbols that he made for me. I was smiling so big and I could tell everyone was watching.

"So, this is why you liked that wall hanging at the store?" Kate asked.

"They're from Edward. He made them for me when we first came to live with him," I explained. I continued taking them out of the box and unwrapping each one. She wanted to know what each symbol meant so as I unwrapped them I told her what it was. She was smiling as I explained each one to her and what Edward had said when he told me about them.

When I got to the last one and pulled the newspaper off, I realized that the glass had broken. I instantly started crying uncontrollably. "It's broke," I sobbed.

"Bella, shh…" Kate tried to comfort. "It's only glass, it can be replaced easily."

I nodded my head trying to find some sort of control.

"What does this one say?" She asked.

I sniffled and wiped my tears. "It means love." I didn't need to give any more explanation for that one. I saw her swallow hard and her eyes gloss over. "I'll call a glass place first thing in the morning to have a piece of glass cut for it." I nodded my head and took a deep breath. I was never a suspicious type of person but the fact that the only one broken was the one that meant love was hard to take in. Especially with the way Edward had been acting. He very rarely ever called me, I was the one to call him and when we did talk our conversations were short and most times he would never tell me he loved me, unless I said it first. Maybe this broken frame was trying to tell me something. I couldn't expect him to just wait for me and continue to love me when we are so far apart. He would move on eventually. I had to come to terms with that.

Late that night, I called Edward to thank him and Esme for the package.

"It was just stuff we thought you'd like to have back," he replied nonchalantly.

"Well, we appreciate all of it. And thank you for the jersey and the watch. I love them and I'll take good care of them."

"That's good," he said.

"So, how is everyone? I haven't talked to Alice in a while. Have you seen her or Jasper lately?"

"They come by occasionally." I didn't like the way he was so short with me all the time. I wanted him to talk to me and tell me everything. Every time I talked to him it hurt worse than the time before.

"Well, I guess I'll let you go," I said.

"Alright," he answered.

"I love you."

"Love you, too," he mumbled.

I slipped into his jersey and held the watch close to my chest while I cried myself to sleep, once again.

The following day when Kate picked us up from school, she informed us that she had hired a body guard to help keep an eye on us. I started to worry if there was a reason for it, but Kate said it was just precaution.

His name was Felix and when he walked into the house to meet us, we all gaped at him. He was huge, tall and built. I was afraid of him instantly, but he had a nice smile and after a little while of getting to know him, we all realized he was very gentle and like a big teddy bear. Seth enjoyed his company and coerced him into playing hours upon hours of video games with him.

After school one day, I walked out with Emily and she noticed Felix standing by the car. I noticed that everyone was staring at him.

"Is that your dad?" She asked.

"No, that's Felix. He's our bodyguard," I answered.

"Why do you need a bodyguard?" She asked, with a confused look on her face.

"It's a long story and I'm not sure I should tell you," I answered.

"Why?"

"You might not like it and you might not want to be my friend anymore," I replied.

"Bella that's crazy. Why wouldn't I want to be your friend?" She rolled her eyes at me.

"I'll tell you about it later. I need to go." I darted off towards the car and Felix held the door open for me. I hopped in and we headed home.

I was surprised when just a little while later Emily showed up at my door. Felix stood in the doorway looking her over intently.

"It's okay Felix, this is my friend, Emily," I pulled him back to allow her in.

She watched him as she came in. I think she was probably a little scared of him. I motioned for Emily to follow me upstairs to my room.

"Wow, he is very scary looking," she said once we were in my room alone.

"I know, but he's actually really nice."

"So, I know you said you would tell me later, but my curiosity got the better of me. Why do you need a bodyguard? Are you famous or something? Is your aunt a movie star? I don't know any random people who have bodyguards."

"I'm not famous. None of us are." I put my hands up to stop her. She reminded me a lot of Alice. Talking non-stop and never giving me a chance to get one word in.

"Then, why do you have a body guard?" She asked sitting down on my bed.

I took a deep breath and explained as much of it as I could without scaring her off completely. I told her about all the abuse over the years and how Edward found out and saved us, but that James was still on the loose and we have to be protected in case he tries to come back.

"Wow, that's just insane. I can't believe your dad did that to you," she said, with a look of shock.

"Emily, please don't say anything to anyone about this. I don't want everyone to know."

"Of course, I won't tell. So this Edward guy. You've never mentioned him before. Is he your boyfriend?"

"Yeah, I think so," I replied. My face fell with the subject being brought up.

"What do you mean, 'you think so'?" She asked suspiciously.

"Emily, it's just all a mess. I left thinking it was best for all of us, Edward included, but now he's different. He barely talks to me on the phone and sometimes doesn't even answer. I talked to my good friend Alice and she said he pretty much dropped out of school. I panicked at first but then she explained that his parent's set it up so he could finish at home, but she says he never leaves his room and barely talks to anyone. I don't know what to do. I feel like he's pulling away from me and doesn't want me anymore."

"Have you asked him point blank what his problem is?" She questioned.

"No," I replied regrettably. "I know, I probably should but I'm afraid to know the truth."

"It's better than trying to guess what's going on. If he doesn't want to be with you anymore, then at least you can move on. There are a lot of hot guys at school and I'm sure you could snag one of them pretty quickly."

I gave her a fake smile.

The thought of even being with someone else made me sick to my stomach. I loved Edward and I didn't think I could ever love anyone the way I loved him. The spark that was between us was still so powerful, even though we were thousands of miles apart. At least that's how it felt for me.

"I should probably go," Emily said walking toward the door. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Bye, Emily. Thanks for talking to me today."

She smiled at me before heading out the door. I got dressed in a pair of shorts and a tank top and headed down to the beach. I liked to lie on the sand and read. It was about the only place I could go that Felix approved of. He sat on the deck facing out towards the beach, so then he could always keep an eye on me and anyone in the house at the same time.

Today though, I didn't read. I thought about Edward and the way he was acting. I know being apart was hard on him but it was hard on me too. He promised that we would be okay and nothing would change. But everything was changing.

By February, everyone was doing a lot better being together. Kate was gone a lot at her job but that was okay since we had Felix to keep us company. Seth had started going to swimming lessons twice a week, which he was enjoying since he had a couple friends who were also in the class. Leah was still very detached and I could tell she was still upset, but she faked being happy and compliant, much like I was doing, for the sake of everyone else. I had convinced Aunt Kate and Felix into letting me get a job later that month. There was a little fast food place just a few blocks from the house and they were hiring. When I actually got the job I was excited. It was the first time I found something here that gave me some amount of happiness. I only worked three days a week for four hours but it was enough. Working helped to keep me busy so I wouldn't dwell on how Edward was acting towards me. It had gotten to the point where he wasn't even answering his phone anymore. My emails went unread. My letters were never responded to. At first, I thought maybe he was just busy or something. But when we went an entire week without talking, I started to get worried.

One night after I had called him for the second time that night and he still didn't answer, I called Emmett.

"Hello," a woman's voice answered his phone. I almost hung up thinking that maybe I got the wrong number, but then I remembered Rosalie. She probably answered his phone. Then I remembered how she acted towards me that last time I saw her and I wasn't sure I wanted to talk to her, so I contemplated hanging up once again.

"This isn't funny, whoever this is better answer me now," she shouted into the phone.

"Um… is… this Emmett's phone?" I stuttered.

"Yes it is and who might you be?" She asked in an accusatory voice.

"This is Bella, Edward's girlfriend," I clarified.

"Oh, well, why are you calling Emmett then?"

"Edward hasn't been answering his phone and he doesn't answer my letters or my emails. He barely talks to me at all. I just wanted to know if he was okay. I wanted to ask Emmett if there was something wrong."

"If you're wondering if Edward is still alive, then the answer is yes. He's just a self absorbed ass like most men."

"What do you mean?" I grimaced.

"He's not thinking about how his actions might affect you. He's only thinking about himself and acting stupid because of it. Don't take anything personal."

"Well, what happened?"

"Nothing, other than he's pretty much locked himself up in his room and mopes around all day."

"Why does he do that?"

"Because he misses you," she answered.

"But if he misses me then why won't he talk to me?" What she was saying made no sense to me.

"Because he's an ass who only thinks about his own feelings," she explained again.

"Oh," I said simply. I still didn't understand.

"Do you want to talk to Emmett still?" She asked.

"No, that's okay."

"Alright, well, Bella, if you ever need someone to talk to you can always call me," she offered.

"Thanks Rosalie."

When we hung up I didn't feel any better and once again cried myself to sleep. As I did almost every night since I left Forks. That's when I missed him the most. I missed him holding me protectively as we slept. I missed him brushing the hair out of my face. I missed how he would kiss me and how it felt when he would put his arms around me. I missed his laugh and his smile. I missed everything about him.

The following weeks I kept myself busy with school and work and continued to send letters almost daily to Edward. But I had given up on calling him. If he wanted to call me, he knew how. I did begin to call Emmett everyday just to get an update. I needed to know that he was at least still alive. I started talking to Rosalie much more as well and began to really like her. She was bold and didn't hold back what was on her mind, but sometimes that was a good thing. She made me feel stronger just talking to her. I called Alice on occasion as well and she would always go on and on about how mad she is at Edward for the way he's treating me but I begged her not to. I was mad at him too, but no matter what, I still loved him.

I finally had enough of the silent treatment and I wanted to confront him about the way he was acting. So, I called his phone completely ready to give him a piece of my mind. I was so nervous to be mad at him, but I needed to do this. I needed to get it out. If he wanted to break up then fine, we'll break up. I'll figure out how to get over him somehow.

When he didn't answer, I wasn't surprised. I figured if I could get Esme or Carlisle on the phone, they could convince him to talk to me.

I wasn't expecting Emmett to answer though. When I told him I needed to talk to Edward, I heard him sigh then say he would go get him.

I listened while he knocked on his door and informed him I was on the phone. When I heard his voice in the background tell him he didn't want to talk to me, my heart sank and I knew at that moment that it was over. Emmett tried to be nice by telling me he was in the shower, but I heard and I knew the truth.

Once I hung up the phone, I cried harder than I ever had. I was hurt and mad and destroyed inside. I had made a huge mistake by leaving and he was never going to forgive me for leaving him.

After a few minutes, I heard my door creak open and I tried to hold back the tears, worried that it might be Seth or Leah. I didn't want them to worry.

When I felt my bed shift and two arms come around me for comfort I realized it was Kate. I was nervous at first. She didn't give us much affection or comfort but here she was.

"I know what you're going through Bella and I know it's hard, but you'll survive. I did," she said. I didn't know what she meant, but I wanted to know. I sat up and flipped on the lamp. She sat up too and stared at me with a sorrow filled look.

"What do you mean by 'I did'?" I asked.

"I guess I probably should tell you this story now. I've been holding it back worried you might be mad at me and I so desperately wanted all of you to like me and accept me." I waited for her to continue but she didn't.

"What have you been holding back?"

"Did Renee ever talk about me?" She asked instead of just telling me.

"She mentioned a few times that she had a sister. She never said much about you though."

"She never told you why I left?" I shook my head waiting for her to elaborate a little more.

She huffed and sat up crossing her legs in front of her. I mirrored her position listening intently. "After our parent's died, Renee pretty much raised me from the time I was sixteen. She already had you and I helped her out with caring for you and we were happy. In my senior year I started dating Garrett."

"Wait, are you talking about the same Garrett from back home?" I interrupted. She nodded her head.

"I was madly in love with him. He had just joined the police squad there in Forks and I thought he was the most amazing guy I had ever met. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him and I intended to until Renee stepped in and told me that I wasn't giving my life up for some boy and that I was going to college. She said being married to a police officer was not the life she wanted for me and I would never be happy since I would worry for his safety all the time. I begged and pleaded with her to let me stay or at least go to a school closer to home, but I had gotten a scholarship here in Florida and she wanted me to take it. She said I would regret it if I didn't go. I was so mad at her for it. Even Garrett tried to convince her to let me stay, but after a while of always arguing with her, he finally started to agree with her and told me to go too. He said he'd wait for me to finish and that once I was done I could come back and we would get married and have the happily ever after. So, I left and started school. Garrett and I called each other constantly the first couple months. We wrote letters back and forth. But after a while, the distance put a strain on our relationship and we didn't call as often and when we did our conversations were short. Eventually we got in a huge fight about it and stopped all together.

I kept in touch with Renee over the next few years mostly though a letter or card on birthdays and Christmas, but even our relationship was strained. I still had a lot of resentment towards her for making me leave him.

When I got the wedding announcement in the mail, informing me she was getting married to a police officer, that anger I had for her doubled. I didn't understand why a police officer was okay for her but not for me. I stopped all communication after that. If she sent letters I sent them back. I didn't want to ever see her again. Once I finished school, I had nothing left in Forks to go back to, so I made a life for myself here. I got a great job and bought this house. I've been happy here.

I never thought that, out of the blue, the man I intended to marry at one time would call me informing me that my sister was dead and had been for a few years and that I had two nieces and a nephew I was responsible for now.

I can never take back what I did. I can never apologize to her for the way I treated her. I'll always regret everything about that. I should have kept in touch with her. I should have never left in the first place. If I was still there I could have stopped James from hurting any of you and my sister would still be alive."

She was crying again and I could see the sadness in her eyes.

"Aunt Kate, please don't feel bad. There wasn't anything you could have done. James is good at convincing people that everything was just fine. He did it for years. And even when my mom started to say stuff, he convinced everyone that she was crazy. He would have convinced you too. There's nothing you could have done." I tried to comfort her with my words and I placed my hand on her shoulder. She half smiled.

"Anyway, the point of my rambling is, I know what you're going through and I'm telling you now, if he can't make it for more than three months then it's probably best just to let him go now."

"Do you still love him?" I asked. Her eyes shot up to mine with a shocked look on her face.

"Do I still love Garrett?" She asked for clarification. I nodded my head and she smiled sheepishly.

"Yes, I do. I didn't think I would see him while I was back in Forks, but when he walked into the living room at the Cullen's place, I think my heart stopped. I wanted to run across the room and fall into his arms and tell him how much I loved him and how sorry I was for never coming home to him. But I had to restrain myself. I didn't know if he was married or if he had a family now. It would be inappropriate for me to do that."

"Then please, don't tell me to let Edward go. I love him more than anything and I plan to go back to him. I know he's mad at me or maybe he's just scared that I won't come back, but I belong with him and I will go back."

"When do you plan to go back?" She asked. I got the inkling that maybe she thought I was planning to leave soon. If I had my way, I'd be on a plane right now, but I was staying for Seth and Leah's sake. They didn't have a choice in coming or staying and I couldn't possibly leave them here. Plus, there was always the threat of James.

"I don't know when, exactly. I just know that I'll go back and if he still wants me, then I'll still want him and if he doesn't, then I'll figure out how to move on without him," I declared.

She nodded her head and smiled. "Well, I just want you to know that I fully support whatever decision you make for your future." I tried to smile but I was still hurting inside. "Why don't you get some sleep, we can talk some more in the morning. I would really like to hear more about my sister if you would ever be willing to share that with me." She pulled herself off the bed and stood above me making sure I was tucked in. It was such a small gesture but exactly what I needed.

"Aunt Kate," I called once she got the door. She stopped and turned around to face me. "Garrett's not married and I think he still has that same connection to you. Maybe you should call him, try to start over." She smiled and shook her head in disbelief.

"I already have a few times. Mainly about the case and what's going on with all of you, but every time we end up arguing about something and hang up on each other. It just wasn't meant to be." She closed the door behind her and I could hear her head to her room.

I lay in bed most of the night thinking about everything she said and I realized that I needed to be with Edward. He was part of me and I would never be happy without him. I would never feel whole again until we were together. Even with the risk of James, life would be so much easier if I could just be with him. He gave me peace and freedom and strength. He made me feel beautiful and most of all loved and I needed to give all of that back to him.

My only problem was Seth and Leah. They would want to come back with me and I didn't think it would be possible. I wouldn't want to do that to Kate anyway. I didn't know what to do, but I did know that whatever I decided, I was going to talk to them about it first. Seth, Leah and I had never been separated and I didn't know if it would be a good idea now.

Everything was so confusing and I didn't know what to do or who to choose. I went back and forth on what I should do. Eventually exhaustion caught up with me and I fell asleep. I tossed and turned most of the night. I dreamt of Edward and Seth and Leah as well as Kate and Garrett. Even James was in my dream. They were all pulling me in different directions and my arms and legs were being ripped off my body. It was a gruesome dream and I woke up the next morning in a cold sweat and my heart was racing.

I got up and took a shower, trying to wash away the stress. I still didn't know what to do or who to choose. Whoever I chose to stay with, someone would end up hurt and I didn't want that.

I stayed in my room most of the day and only came out to eat. I lay on my bed staring at the pocket watch Edward had sent me and obsessively watched the seconds pass by. I tried to imagine what he was doing at this moment and what we would be doing if I was there. I wanted him back so bad.

Around dinner time, I went down stairs and started making it. Kate had let me take on the role of making us dinner each night, which I think everyone was happy about. Since I wasn't in the greatest moods, I decided on something simple and just made some spaghetti with garlic bread and a salad.

We all sat down to eat and I looked around the table at everyone. Leah still had the same scowl on her face as she normally did. Seth didn't have that spark of hope and joy in his eyes anymore. Aunt Kate looked sad and almost at the edge of tears at any moment. Even Felix, who began eating dinner with us every night, looked tense. I didn't know how to make any of this better, how to make us all happy again.

When we heard a car, pull up outside the house Felix groaned and jumped up from the table heading outside to see who it was. Seth ran to the window peering out to see what was going on.

We all heard him gasp and then squeal Edward's name. He ran towards the front door before anyone could stop him and jerked it open running straight to Edward. Leah leaped out the door next brushing past Felix. Edward picked up Seth and swung him around before setting him down and giving Leah a huge hug too. I stood there staring at him in disbelief. Why was he here? How did he get here? He had on a pair of blue jeans with a black t-shirt. He looked thin and his face looked pale and sunken. I wanted to be mad at him for everything that had happened the last few months, but the electric pull I felt to him was excruciating. Once our eyes met, I wanted to run to him and tell him how happy I was to see him and how much I loved him, but the anger I felt toward him came back to me after the initial shock of seeing him. I wanted to be mad at him now. To tell him how much he had hurt me the last few months, but I couldn't even move. I stood frozen in the doorway as our eyes locked.

* * *

**So Bella is in survival mode and back to being the mother figure, which she doesn't mind doing, but she's struggling with what to do. She's thinking about everyone elses feelings instead of her own. Promise next chapter they are back together. I tried to make it as short and painless as possible. I don't like them being apart either and I struggled writing these last two chapters because my mind kept skipping ahead to the next chapter.**


	20. Chapter 19

**I had an amazing week, first it was my birthday on Monday so that was nice. Tuesday morning this story got a recommendation ****from Kstew411 on twitter which was huge so thanks for that Kstew411 and bzeemomof4 for you tweeting about my story all the time. Then later that day I found out my one-shot "Happenstance" won second place in the "Anything Goes Under the Mistletoe" challenge which was so amazing and completely unexpected. But I have to say, now I'm really feeling the pressure when it comes to writing good chapters. I think I re-wrote this chapter 3 times before I was semi-happy with it. I'm never happy with anything I write. oh well :-) **

**Thanks to all the new followers who added me to favorites or alerts and those who reviewed. I really appreciate all of it.**

**Thank you bzeemomof4 and redlulu for being my beta's and for being so supportive and helpful.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or its characters.**

* * *

**Happiness: The Fray**

Happiness is just outside my window  
I thought it crashed blowing 80-miles an hour?  
Or is happiness a little more like knocking  
On your door, and you just let it in?

Happiness feels a lot like sorrow  
Let it be, you can't make it come or go  
But you are gone- not for good but for now  
Gone for now feels a lot like gone for good

Happiness is a firecracker sitting on my headboard  
Happiness was never mine to hold  
Careful child, light the fuse and get away  
'Cause happiness throws a shower of sparks

Happiness damn near destroys you  
Breaks your faith to pieces on the floor  
So you tell yourself, that's enough for now  
Happiness has a violent roar

Happiness is like the old man told me  
Look for it, but you'll never find it all  
But let it go, live your life and leave it  
Then one day, wake up and she'll be home  
Home, home, home

**EPOV**

The flight I took landed me in Denver , Colorado . As soon as I got off the plane, I went straight to the ticket counter and bought a one-way ticket to Jacksonville, Florida . I didn't know how long I would stay or if I even planned to come home. She was my home and wherever she is, is where I plan to be from now on. The threat of James or not, I wasn't going to be separated from her ever again.

I had to wait three hours for my next flight, so I grabbed something to eat in the airport, but I really didn't eat much. I called home around nine their time, just so they knew I was okay. My mom was hysterical with worry, but I kept trying to reassure her that I was fine. I didn't tell them where I really was. Instead, I told them I just needed some time to myself and that I was staying at Jasper's. I knew if I told them where I was going, they would try to convince me to come home and if I refused, they would call Kate and she would probably forbid me from seeing her or some shit like that. I wanted to arrive unexpected so she would at least have to see me and maybe give me a chance to talk to her.

I called Jasper right after making sure he could cover for me, at least for a little while. I knew Emmett would figure it out eventually, if he hadn't already. I just needed to get there first before anyone knew where I was.

Just as I was about to board the plane again, my phone started ringing. I grabbed it out of my pocket and saw Emmett's name pop up on the screen. He figured it out.

"Edward what the hell do you think you're doing?" He shouted into the phone when I answered.

"I just need some time Emmett. I'll be fine, I promise. I was careful about where I went and what route I took, so if James saw me or followed me he would have lost me by now."

"I know where you're going. You're being stupid. You're putting both of you in danger."

"Emmet, we're already in danger. We have been for a long time. That isn't going to change until James is found. Isn't it better to face danger together than separated? If James wants to hurt us then he's going to have to come after both of us."

"You're going to have to come back eventually. You know that right?" He asked.

"Why do I have to come back? I'm eighteen Emmett, legally free to make my own choices and I've made my choice. I want to be wherever she is." I expressed. "I'm not coming back."

"Not ever?" He gasped.

"I don't know. It depends on a lot of things."

"Have you told mom and dad this?"

"No," I informed. "I have to make sure she wants me to stay, first."

"You are aware that I can't help you if you stay right?" He clarified.

"You said it yourself, the police in Florida are aware of the situation. Kate hired a bodyguard also, we'll be fine."

"Edward, this isn't a good idea." He said exasperatedly.

"Just take care of mom and dad and make sure they're safe. I'll take care of myself. I have to go the plane is boarding."

He huffed and I'm sure he was rolling his eyes. "Be careful, and don't do anything stupid. Be alert and if anything seems off, call me as soon as possible."

"I will," I promised. "And Emmett, please don't call Bella."

Once I was in Florida , I grabbed a cab and gave the driver the address. I anxiously tapped my fingers on my knee as he drove. I was so close and I could almost feel her already.

When he pulled up in front of the house, I hopped out and paid the driver, then stood there on the sidewalk staring at the house nervously. I took a deep a breath and began to walk up the path. I only took about five steps before I was confronted by a huge man standing in front of me.

"May I ask what your business here is?" He asked calmly. He placed a hand on my chest holding me back. I swatted his hand away and glared up at him.

"Who the hell are you?" I shouted.

"I ask again, what is your business here?" He asked firmly.

"I just need to see Bella," I explained.

"I'm sorry, that's not possible," he answered.

"Edward…" I heard Seth shout. We both turned and saw him fly out of the door running down the path. I smiled instantly at the sight of him. I missed Bella tremendously, but I wasn't aware of how much I missed Seth too. He ran right past the man that I was sure was the bodyguard and straight into my arms. I picked him up and swung him around. He giggled and held on to me tightly. When I put him down, I was attacked by a hug from Leah. They were both smiling so big and looked so happy. When I pulled away from Leah I looked up and saw Bella standing in the doorway with Kate. Her arms were across her chest. As our eyes met I could see and feel all the anger and pain I had caused written all over her face.

"Felix, it's okay," Kate said from the doorway. He stood aside and let me walk by him. I glared at him as I walked around him.

My eyes once again fell on Bella and I stopped a few feet in front of her. I swallowed hard as I waited for something, anything from her to give me some hope.

"Seth, Leah, why don't we give Edward and Bella sometime alone," Kate suggested. She turned towards Bella and placed her hands on her shoulders. "Maybe you could go down on the beach and talk." She suggested to Bella sweetly.

Everyone went back in the house and Felix gave me a warning look before he closed the door.

I looked back towards Bella and opened my mouth to talk, but just as I did she turned and started walking down towards the beach. I followed at a safe distance behind her until she stopped on the beach. She faced the water and looked out at the horizon. The sun was getting close to setting and it was starting to cool down a little. Her hair was blowing in the wind and even from behind she looked absolutely beautiful.

I stood a few feet behind her, but she never turned around to face me. The silence hung between us, neither of us knowing what to say.

"Bella, I'm sorry for everything," I began finally. "I was such a jerk to you. I feel horrible for the way I treated you. It was just so hard not being able to see you or touch you. It was killing me, much like it is right now. You're so close, but I still feel so far away from you."

I waited for her to say something, but she didn't.

I took a step closer to her. "Baby, please just say something. Tell me how mad you are at me. Yell and scream at me. Tell me you hate me. I don't care, just say something." I pleaded, on the brink of tears. I just wanted to hear her voice.

She turned around so quickly and threw herself into my arms. I almost didn't realize what had happened. Her arms went up around my neck and I wrapped my arms around her waist, pulling her as close to me as possible. I buried my face in her hair and breathed in her scent, letting out a sigh of relief. This was home. This was my sanctuary. I was whole once again.

I smiled into her neck. "I love you so much, Bella." I could feel her tears on my neck and I wanted to pull back to brush them away and tell her everything was going to be okay now, but I didn't want to let her go. I never want to let her go again.

We stood there on the beach clinging to each other for a long time. After a while, I heard her take a deep breath then step away from me. When I lost our connection, the tightness that had been in my chest for months came back so fast.

"Why did you do it?" She asked, wiping tears off her cheeks. "Why did you stop calling me and refuse to talk to me when I would call you?"

"Bella, I was miserable without you. Every time I talked to you I just felt worse. You sounded so happy here and it felt like you were forgetting about me." I tried to explain. "I know I was being selfish and not thinking about you and I'm sorry for that. Please forgive me. I can't live without you."

The tears started coming down her cheeks again and I so desperately wanted to reach out to wipe them away but I didn't know if she would allow me to.

"Did you not think I was feeling the same way?" she sobbed. "Edward, I missed you so much. My whole world stopped when we got here and every day I had to figure out how to keep going. I had to be strong for Seth and Leah. Even for Kate. Every night when I was alone, I would cry myself to sleep, wishing I could be with you. And then when you started pulling away from me, I didn't know what to do. I wanted to go back to you but Seth and Leah were here and Kate was struggling with how to take care of us. I didn't know who to choose. I didn't know what I was supposed to do."

"I'm sorry Bella, I wish there was something I could say to make this all better, but I can't. I don't want you to have to choose. That's why I came. If you want me then I'm staying here."

Her wide eyes shot to mine. "What?"

I took a step closer and reached out for her hand. "If you still want me, I'll stay here with you. I don't want us to be apart anymore. Wherever you are is where I plan to be, from now on."

She looked over my shoulder back towards the house. I started to turn to see what she was looking at but before I could turn completely, she grabbed my face and met my lips with hers. There was an instant shock of electricity that ran through my body. I picked her up in my arms and kissed her long and hard. Our tongues mingled together and everything felt right again.

When our kiss broke, I still held her a few inches off the ground, not willing to let her pull away from me again.

"I love you, Edward. I always will," she whispered.

"Oh baby, I'll always love you too. Don't ever leave me again." I finally set her back down on her feet and looked into her face. I brushed the hair away and kissed her tears. Her face was so bright with happiness and I'm sure mine was the same way. "Do you have any idea how beautiful you are?"

She ducked her head and groaned. "I probably look horrible. I cry all the time and today I spent most of the day in my room."

I shook my head at her and smiled. "You are always beautiful to me." I stroked my thumb along her cheek and leaned in hesitantly to kiss her again. I wasn't sure if she would allow me to kiss her again but I so desperately wanted to.

Her head tilted up to meet my lips with hers and in that moment, I knew we would be okay.

Her fingers traced a line under my eyes. "Your eyes have dark circles under them. And you look so thin. What happened to you, Edward?"

I smiled. "The girl I love left and I didn't sleep or eat much when she was gone. Actually, I didn't do much of anything." Her face fell into a frown. I could tell she was feeling guilty for it and I didn't want that. I placed my fingers under her chin and raised her face to look at her. "But everything is better now, I'm home with you, where I belong."

She smiled up at me. "Are you serious about wanting to stay?" I nodded my head.

"If you want me to," I replied.

"Of course I want you to. I just don't know if my aunt will let you."

"Well, there's only one way to find out." I reached down taking her hand in mine and started guiding us back up to the house. She laid her head against my arm as we walked and I leaned over kissing her hair.

"I'm still mad at you for the way you treated me," she whispered as we walked.

"Good, I want you to be mad at me. I deserve it, but you can never be as mad at me as I am with myself. I promised you long ago that I would always be there for you and I would never hurt you. But I broke that promise and I will make it up to you somehow," I guaranteed.

She stopped walking, so I stopped to turn to her. "I guess you should be mad at me too, for what I did to you," she wondered. "I shouldn't have made it sound like I was going on and forgetting about you. That's not what I was doing. I just thought if you knew how broken I felt, you would feel helpless to do anything. I knew it would make you feel worse, so I tried to make it sound like I was happy. I guess I had it backwards." Her face fell once more. I pulled her to me and kissed her forehead.

"Let's make a deal," I presented. "From now on, we talk about how we're really feeling and what is really going on, so we don't have these misunderstandings anymore." She nodded her head and gave me a weak smile.

I leaned down slightly to catch her eyes. "Do you want to know what I'm feeling at this very moment?" She nodded and her eyes widened with anticipation.

One side of my mouth lifted into a half smile. "I feel extremely happy and relieved. I feel like a huge weight that's been sitting on my chest for months is finally gone. I feel like if it was possible I could actually fly right now." I laughed. She smiled and her entire face lit up with joy. She leaned up and kissed me deeply.

We didn't break until we heard someone clear their throat a few feet away. We both turned to see who it was and I saw that same tall man that met me on the path when I first arrived.

"Oh, um… Edward this is Felix. He's our bodyguard. Felix this is Edward," she introduced us and I extended my hand to him.

"It's nice to meet you sir," I said politely. He shook my hand but only hummed in response. This guy worried me. He didn't look suspicious or anything, he just seemed a little too overly protective of Bella. Maybe I was reading into things too much, but I'd be lying if I didn't admit that I was a little territorial.

We walked past him and I placed my hand on the small of her back, to guide her the rest of the way up the steps to the house.

Once inside, Seth came running with a huge grin on his face. "Are you staying?" He asked excitedly. I glanced at Bella and then to Kate.

"Why don't we go in my office to talk?" Kate suggested. "Felix, will you keep an eye on Seth and Leah for a few minutes?"

"Sure thing," he answered with a nod of his head.

I grabbed Bella's hand and squeezed it as we followed Kate into her office that was off of the kitchen. There were smells of garlic and tomatoes coming from the kitchen and it smelled so good. For the first time in a long time, I felt hungry enough to actually eat.

Once inside the office, Kate shut the door behind us and turned toward us. Bella instinctively tightened her grip on my hand and I did the same. It was our way of reassuring each other that no matter what, we were not going to be separated anymore.

"It's nice to see you again, Edward," Kate began. "I have to say, I'm a little surprised but glad that you came. I don't know what you did, but all three of them lit up at the sight of you. I don't know if I've ever seen anyone so happy before."

"Well, they all mean a lot to me. We share a bond that can't ever be broken." I smiled over at Bella when I spoke. She smiled back and a light pink shade spread across her cheeks.

"I hope you understand that I had to call your parent's," she changed subjects.

"I expected that," I returned.

"They aren't too thrilled that you didn't tell them what you were up to and they're worried about you. I assured them that as long as you were here you would be looked after and protected though."

"Thank you," I said.

"They want you to call them as soon as possible," she ordered. I nodded my head in understanding.

"How long do you plan to stay?" She asked.

I glanced to Bella who gave me a reassuring smile. "I'm not sure ma'am. I guess as long as you'll let me."

She looked to Bella who had a pleading look on her face. I couldn't help but smile at the sight of it. "Well, we'll have to discuss that further at a later time. For right now though you are welcome to stay here. Felix stays in the spare room, so I guess I could make you up a bed on the couch."

"That would be fine. Thank you ma'am," I expressed.

"Edward, if you plan to stay here for a while there's just one thing I ask," Kate started. "Please don't call me ma'am. My name is Kate and that's how I prefer to be addressed." I nodded my head in understanding.

We started to head towards the door. Bella was grinning like a little kid in a candy store. I was probably smiling as big as she was.

"Are you hungry?" Bella asked. "I made spaghetti for dinner tonight. It's nothing special but I can make you something else if you don't want spaghetti. If I knew you were coming I would have made something better."

"Bella, spaghetti's fine." I stopped her. "It actually smells really good." I smiled and took a seat on a bar stool. She walked into the kitchen and I watched her fill a plate with some food and stick it in the microwave. When it beeped she brought the plate over and sat it down in front of me. She watched me intently as I ate the spaghetti, which tasted amazing, even if it was re-heated in the microwave.

"Aren't you going to eat?" I asked.

"I already ate a little bit before you got here," she replied.

I put my hand out to hers and guided her around the counter to sit in the stool next to me. "Share with me. This is far too much for me to eat on my own." I rolled some noodles around my fork and fed them to her. She took it into her mouth and watched me the entire time. I smirked at her as she chewed. "Why do you keep watching me?" I asked.

"I feel like you're going to disappear if I look away," she answered.

"Bella, I'm not going anywhere."

"I know you keep saying that, but what if something happens and something else takes you away from me?"

I leaned over and kissed her lightly. "I'm not going anywhere without you. I promise," I said. She nodded her head. I reached up and fed her another bite of the spaghetti and held her hand with my free hand. When I had eaten far more than I should have, we went to sit in the living room. Seth jumped up and sat next to us.

"Are you staying?" He asked once again.

"Yes Seth, I'm staying," I answered with a smile. I glanced over towards Leah and saw her smile too.

Felix sat in an oversized chair in the corner watching both me and Bella with Seth. I glared in his direction occasionally, but he didn't seem to notice.

After about two hours, Kate came out of her office looking rather flustered and annoyed. She went upstairs and grabbed some bedding for the couch then informed Seth and Leah it was time for bed. They both gave me huge hugs goodnight then headed upstairs. I watched as Felix began doing perimeter checks of the house making sure all alarms were on and all windows and doors were locked.

Bella went upstairs to put some pajamas on before returning to the couch with me.

Felix headed up stairs once all his checks were done and Kate headed up shortly after.

"Bella, don't stay up too long," Kate suggested.

"I won't," she replied.

Once we were finally alone again, she glanced over at me nervously. I waited to see what she would do. She kept glancing over and when our eyes would meet she would look away again. The blush of her cheeks was starting to darken as she got more and more embarrassed. I laughed at her then reached out and pulled her into my arms. She looked up at me and I brushed my thumb across her reddened cheek. "I have missed this so much."

"I've missed this too. Being in your arms, feeling safe, it's all I ever want," she said. I leaned in and kissed her deeply.

We sat on the couch for a long time just staring into each other's eyes and smiling like idiots. It felt so normal to be here with her. It was like we were never apart. Everything was right in the world again. After a while, I fell asleep on the couch with Bella tucked into my side, wrapped in my arms.

In the morning, we were woken by Seth pulling on my arm.

"Come on, Edward, I want to show you what I can do," Seth whined.

"Okay, I'm getting up." Bella sat up and rubbed her face while I got pulled off the couch by Seth.

I went into the bathroom and changed my clothes and brushed my teeth and when I came out Seth was waiting for me. He grabbed my arm again and pulled me out the door that led to the deck. Leah was sitting on the deck reading a book when we stepped outside.

"Seth wants to show you the sand castle he's been working on," Leah explained, as we passed by her.

I followed Seth to the sand castle he was building. He was so excited to share it with someone. I smiled and listened intently as he described every detail.

After a while, Bella came down on the beach carrying a muffin and a cup of coffee. She handed it to me and I thanked her for it. We walked a short distance away from Seth, but still close enough where we could see him and sat down in the sand.

"Edward," Bella asked. I looked in her direction and saw her eyebrows furrowed like she was thinking of something really hard. "Do you ever wonder why all this happened?"

"What do you mean?"

"I never thought anything would ever change. I just accepted what was happening to all of us and never expected it to get any better. But for some strange reason, you came along and made me feel free. I'm still trying to figure out why you love me. Why you would risk your life for me," she thought aloud.

"Is it still that hard to believe that I love you?" I asked. She shook her head.

"Do you believe in fate?" She asked. I shrugged my shoulders and looked at her trying to understand what she was talking about.

She ducked her head and sighed. "It was something James said to me before he locked me in the basement. He said, I decided both of our fates when I decided to defy him and tell you what was really happening."

"Are you still having the dreams?" I asked. Her head shot up with bulging eyes. "Bella, I know you feel guilty about everything that's happened but you need to stop. You didn't make me help you. You didn't force me to save you. You didn't decide my fate either. I made the choice to be in your life and to love you. I'm just glad I was able to. Whatever happens in the future, we'll do it together." I pulled her into my arms and kissed her head.

"Before I forget, Kate wanted me to tell you that your dad called this morning," Bella informed.

"Shit, I forgot to call my parents last night," I exclaimed. She sat up, letting me reach into my pocket for my phone. I turned it on and saw that I had eleven missed calls. I scrolled through them, six were either from mom or dad, and the rest were from Emmett. The last call I missed was just an hour ago from dad's cell. I called him first. I knew mom and Emmett would probably have a lot to say but dad was always calm and didn't get upset as easily.

"Edward," he gasped into the phone.

"Dad, I'm fine. I'm in Florida with Bella and everything is great now," I explained.

"Why didn't you tell us you were going to Florida?" He asked.

"I knew you would try to convince me to come home and I didn't want to. Dad, I need to be with Bella. It's hard to explain, but I need to be with her."

"I understand why you did it son. I'm actually surprised it took you this long to go. I just wish you would have told someone. Your brother isn't very happy with what you did though. He's been stressed and he's taking it out on Rosalie. I hid out at the hospital all night, just to get away from them."

"Is mom okay," I asked. Bella glanced up at me when I mentioned mom.

"She's fine, just worried about both you and Emmett. You should probably call her and let her know you're safe."

"I will. Is everything okay though? Why is Emmett so stressed?"

"He doesn't tell me much, but I have a feeling it's about James," he said.

I swallowed hard, knowing that if Emmett was stressed and it was about James, then we were in big trouble. I forced a smile in Bella's direction, so as not to worry her, but I don't think it did any good.

"Should I call Emmett then?" I asked.

"I think it might be a good idea. He can fill you in on everything that's going on."

"Okay, can you tell mom not to worry? We'll all be fine."

"I know you will son. Just be smart about things and don't do anything stupid while trying to be the hero," he asked.

I laughed. "I won't dad."

After I hung up with him, I called Emmett. He informed me that James was seen at the airport buying a ticket to Florida and they almost had him but like always he was two steps ahead of them.

"But Emmett, I never bought a ticket to Florida until I got to Denver. How could he have known that's where I was going?" I asked.

"We have reason to believe he's always known where they were and he must have known somehow that you took off and the only place you would have gone is to Florida. We know he has a car, so since he didn't take the flight that we were waiting for him at, he is most likely driving there. He could drive to another airport and fly from there but we aren't sure what he'll do," Emmett said.

"So, what do _we_ do?" I asked. Bella looked worried and I reached out to her hand rubbing her knuckles to reassure her.

"Garrett is on his way down there now," he explained. "He's going to talk to the police and he'll fill you in on more of the plan."

"Why did Garrett come and not you?" I asked.

"Well, first of all Garrett volunteered. But more importantly, I had to stay for mom and Rosalie's sake," he explained.

"Why, what's going on?" I asked.

"Mom is extremely stressed, and you leaving, the way you did, isn't helping. If I left too, she would be a mess. Plus Rosalie doesn't want me to leave her for that long."

I felt bad that I had caused mom so much stress, but what could I do? I was being pulled in so many directions and I didn't know what I was supposed to do.

I hung up with Emmett and told him I would call later.

"What's going on?" Bella asked.

"I think I made a huge mistake." I ran my hands through my hair and groaned.

"Why, what happened?" She asked in a panicked tone.

"James is on his way here," I explained. Her eyes got big and her breathing accelerated. "Bella, relax. Everything will be fine. He hasn't done anything in months even when he had the opportunity. He isn't going to try anything now."

"What do you mean, he had the opportunity?" Great, I told her too much. I couldn't lie to her anymore. She needed to know the truth.

"Emmett told me not to tell you, but James has been around." Her eyes bulged and her mouth fell open as I told her what was going on. "He was hiding out at Heidi's, but Emmett and Garrett have been on the case and were able to get her and her kids to a safe house. They've been trying to catch him but they haven't had much luck."

"What's he doing?" She asked.

"He's after me. He blames me for taking his kids away and once he's done with me, he plans to get all of you back. I don't know what his plan is after that, but that's what they were able to piece together so far. I also saw him one day outside of the hospital watching me."

"Edward," she shrieked. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't tell anyone about that until just a few days ago, when I told Emmett. He was only watching me and when I got out of the car and our eyes met, he left a few minutes later."

"Why didn't you tell anyone? They could have got him."

"Bella, by the time police would have got there and I told them my story, he would have been long gone. I was mad and depressed and I didn't talk to anyone really. I know I probably should have said something, but I was being stupid. Which is what both my brother and my dad told me not to do," I laughed.

"Well, if he's coming here then what do we do?"

"Garrett is on his way here now. He's going to talk to the police and get everything worked out," I explained.

"Garrett's on his way here?" She asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, why do you seem skeptical of that?"

"It's not that, I just think it's going to be interesting." I looked at her with questioning eyes.

She rolled her eyes at me and stood up. "We should get Seth and go inside. It's safer if we're all in one spot."

"Are you going to tell me why you think it's going to be interesting?" I asked as we started heading back to the house.

"We need to tell Kate and Felix about what's going on first," she said.

We went back in the house and told Kate and Felix what we knew. I wasn't surprised when they informed us that they were already aware of the situation. We were advised to stay in the house until Garrett got here with more information about what we were to do.

We spent the afternoon playing video games and watching TV with Seth and Leah, while we waited for Garrett. Kate paced the floors while Felix kept vigil at the window.

I could tell Bella was tense, but she was hiding it. Around five she started to make dinner and I sat at the bar watching her. I offered my help but she laughed and told me no.

When dinner was done, we all sat at the table and ate. Garrett still hadn't shown up, so I called Emmett who said he had talked to him recently and he was still at the police station.

Around nine that night, Garrett finally showed up. As soon as he walked in there was tension. I didn't understand why, but I could feel it. Kate sent Leah and Seth to bed while Bella made Garrett a plate of food. He ate it hastily, like he hadn't eaten all day. It was probably a good possibility that he hadn't. We kept waiting for him to give us some news or anything but he didn't.

"This is really good, Bella," he said, stuffing another bite in his mouth. "I don't think I've eaten anything this good in a very long time."

"Thank you," she said shyly.

"Garrett, will you please just give us an update?" I demanded.

"Everything is fine, Edward," he said sounding annoyed. "There are two cops right outside, another down the street and Felix is on the porch. There was a possible sighting of him in California earlier today so our best bet is that he's driving here which will take a few days. Either way though, the Jacksonville police will catch him if he comes anywhere near here."

"So, why are you here?" I asked. He turned his head towards me with a raised eyebrow.

"Why are you here Edward?" He countered. My eyebrows furrowed in confusion. He turned back to his plate and finished eating.

"I have some things I need to discuss with Kate," Garrett said. "Do you think both of you could go upstairs for a little while?"

"What's going on?" Bella asked before I had a chance to ask the same thing.

"It's just some information I need to give her about the police being around. It's nothing to be concerned about," he clarified.

"Edward," Bella said, pulling on my hand. "Let's go. We can go up to my room and give them some privacy." I glanced back at Garrett then to Kate before following Bella upstairs.

We went up to Bella's bedroom and once inside, I glanced around and saw that her room looked very familiar to how it looked back home. The bed was in the same place, there were pictures on the wall, a shelf with all her books. Even the Japanese symbols that I made her hung above her bed like they had at home.

As soon as I heard the door click, I turned around to face her.

"What was that about?" I asked.

She smiled. "You don't know?" She teased. I shook my head. "Garrett and Kate dated a long time ago. They were even talking about getting married. But when Kate moved here to go to school, things changed and they lost touch with each other. I know Kate still has strong feelings for him and I have a feeling Garrett does for her as well."

"Wow," I said, sitting down on the bed. "So, that must be why Garrett's so enthralled in this case."

Bella came and sat down on the bed next to me.

"I was shocked when I first heard about it too. But Kate is really nice to us and she's always so supportive of whatever we choose. She just wants all of us to be happy and she's willing to do anything to make that happen. I think that's why she's letting you stay. I want her to be happy too and I think if she and Garrett can work things out, she will be. That's why I wanted to give them some privacy."

"Well," I said, grabbing her around the waist and pulling her down to lay on the bed with me. "I think we need some privacy too." She giggled as I began kissing her fully on the lips.

When I pulled away, I brushed some hair out of her face and tucked it behind her ear.

"Edward," she asked. I hummed in response. "Are you scared?"

"Scared of James?" I asked. She nodded her head. I took a deep breath. "I'd be lying if I said no. But I know that if we're together we'll be able to get through this." She nestled into my chest and I held her tightly.

"You never did tell me if you were still having those dreams. Are you?" I asked.

"Not as much," she replied. "I think being away from the threat of him coming after us might have helped."

"And now I brought the threat back," I said, regrettably.

"Edward, the threat was always there. James is always going to be in the back of my mind. You didn't do anything but save me."

"That was something else I wanted to tell you," I said. She lifted her head to look up at me. I stared up at the ceiling. "A few weeks before I found you in the basement, I had a dream that I was in there. I had never been there before, but I remember it was cold and dark. I was searching all over for something and when I came to a little door and put my hand on the door knob, at that moment I felt relieved. Whatever it was that was behind that door was what I was looking for. Then I woke up." I looked down at her face to see what her reaction was. I smiled sheepishly at her shocked expression. "That's probably really crazy isn't it?"

"Yes," she replied simply.

"Well thanks," I scoffed.

"No, Edward I didn't mean it that way," she retorted. "What I meant was that it's crazy because I had a dream of you saving me too. It was actually the night before you talked to me. I woke up that morning after I had a dream that I was in the basement. I was so weak and tired. I couldn't see anything. Then I heard steps coming down the stairs and I thought it was James, but then I heard a voice tell me that it was going to be okay and they were here to get me out. I couldn't see the face. I didn't know who it was. When I woke up I laughed because it was never going to happen. No one was going to care about me enough to save me."

"Why didn't you ever tell me about this," I asked.

"Why didn't you ever tell me about your dream?" she countered.

"I guess I forgot about it until after you left."

"I didn't forget mine. I think maybe that's why my dreams of you dying scare me so much. If my dream of you saving me was true then why wouldn't my dreams of you dying be true?"

I pulled her close to me and sighed. "Maybe it's a fate thing, like you were talking about earlier. Maybe we both have to dream it for it to be real. And I promise you, there haven't been any dreams of either of us dying." I could feel her smile against my chest and I kissed the top of her head.

We laid there for a long time and after a while I was sure she had fallen asleep. I was too nervous about James coming back to sleep. I needed to come up with some sort of plan to keep them safe and to catch James once and for all.

After a while, I started hearing shouting coming from downstairs. I wanted to know what was going on, so I slipped out from underneath Bella and laid her down on the pillow, before heading out the door.

I stopped about half way down the stairs to listen. It was Kate and Garrett and they were arguing about something.

"You can't do this Kate," Garrett shouted.

"You can't tell me what to do," she countered. "I'm doing what I think is best for my nieces and nephew."

"Yeah, just like your sister did what was best for you, all those years ago," Garrett argued.

"My sister did make the right choice for me. I don't know what I was thinking all those years ago when I planned to marry you."

"So, then why are you so set on keeping them together? If you think you made such a bad choice back then what makes you so sure they aren't making the same bad choice now?" Garrett asked.

"Because he loves her enough to come after her when someone splits them up," she answered. "That's the difference Garrett." There was a long silent pause before Kate spoke again. Her voice was quieter and not so angry now. "I'm not letting you split them up again, even if you think it's the right thing to do. I haven't seen any of them smile since they've been here, but the minute that boy walked into this house, all three have them have been nothing but happy. I'm not going to take that away from them again. They've had far too much taken away as it is. I shouldn't have done it in the first place. They belong back in Forks and that's where we're going."

"Kate," Garrett said softly. "It's not just about keeping them safe now. It's about keeping you safe too. Edward should have never come here in the first place. We almost had him and then he had to go and screw things up." I instantly felt horrible. I messed things up once again. But they couldn't seriously be thinking of splitting us up again. Was Kate really planning to move back to Forks?

"I don't need you to protect me Garrett. That's what I have Felix for and I've already discussed it with him. He'll go wherever I need him to."

"But that's where you're wrong Kate. I do have to protect you. I'm always going to protect you, because I still love you. I'm coming after you now and I hope it's not too late. I'm sorry it took me so long."

I heard Kate whimper and then I heard the smacking noises of them kissing. I didn't want to eavesdrop on them anymore, so I headed back up the stairs. I lay back on the bed with Bella and she instinctively pulled herself to my side. I wrapped my arms around her and fell asleep.

The next morning, everything that Kate and Garrett had said all came back to me and I wanted some answers. Bella shifted in the bed as I got up and asked where I was going.

"I need to talk to Garrett about a plan I have," I answered. She hopped up and followed me out.

Garrett was in the Kitchen talking something over with Felix and another police officer, while Kate busied herself with making breakfast. I grabbed Bella's hand and walked over to them.

"Garrett," I started. He turned to look at me. "I'm not letting you split us up again." He looked at me with a shocked expression and I heard Kate gasp. "I heard what you were talking about last night and I don't know what your plan is, but it's not going to happen. Wherever Bella goes, I go."

"Edward, here's the deal. I'm going to send the four of them to a safe house that he can't get to and you are going to stay here with me to set a trap. It won't be that long."

"That's what my brother told me three months ago. I'm not going to do that again. I like Kate's idea of going back to Forks and I think I have a plan."

He sighed heavily and sat down on the barstool. "Okay, what's your plan?" He asked. I glanced over at Bella who was staring at me with confusion.

"We split up," I stated.

Bella's eyes shot to mine. "But you just said we wouldn't be split up again," she exclaimed.

I grabbed her hands. "Just listen to me for a minute. Everything will be alright." She nodded her head and let out a breath.

"We need to stay two steps in front of him for a change. He isn't going to expect all of us to go back to Washington. He'll think we were moved to another safe location. If we all get out of here now and head back on different routes it's going to throw him off. If he's driving, I'm sure once he gets here he's going to be tired and confused in unfamiliar surroundings. It will be easier for the police to corner him. Back home he knows the area well and knows everyone's routines and where they will be at all times. But here he won't have that advantage and they can set a trap for him that he isn't suspecting and then hopefully they'll be able to catch him. But in case something goes wrong and he finds out we all left, he won't know where we went if we all take different flights. He won't think that we're stupid enough to go back to Forks. Both Emmett and my dad told me not to do anything stupid, but right now I think that's what we need to do."

Garrett stroked his chin with his fingers for a couple seconds regarding my idea. "It's not a bad idea. If we can confuse him, it will be easier to catch him off guard," Garrett agreed. "I think it might work, Edward."

"Good," I said. "One thing though. Don't tell anyone back home. Not even my parent's or my brother or anyone else. I have a feeling someone close to us is tipping him off and the less people that know the better."

"You think someone has been tipping him off too?" Garrett said.

I nodded my head. "I've been suspecting Sam, but I'm not sure."

"I've thought the same thing, but like you I haven't been able to figure it out," Garrett said then smiled at me. "You are going to make an excellent cop someday."

I laughed. "I don't have any intention of being a police officer."

"You never know," he said with a shrug of his shoulders.

"Well, I guess I need to make some calls and start packing some bags," Kate chimed in.

"I'll help," Bella offered, following Kate out of the room.

"I take it since you heard what we were discussing last night, you heard me tell Kate that you screwed up," Garrett wondered. I nodded my head. "I'm sorry about that. I was just mad and frustrated."

"Garrett, I don't need an explanation. I know I screwed up, but I can't stay away from her anymore."

He nodded his head and placed his hand on my shoulder. "I understand completely."

"So, are you Kate getting back together?" I asked with a smirk.

He laughed and shook his head. "I don't know, I think we're trying, but it's going to take some time."

"Well, I hope it works out," I offered.

I headed back upstairs to help Bella and explain things further to her. I knew she was probably confused and scared. But I kept reassuring her that it would work. At least I hoped it would.

Within a couple hours we were all packed and ready to go. Kate took a leave of absence from her job and said she was thinking of looking into transferring to the Seattle branch if things worked out for them to stay in Forks.

Bella called her boss at her job informing him that there was a family emergency and she had to quit. She felt horrible about deserting like that but she didn't have much choice. She also called her friend Emily and told her they were going on a small vacation for spring break and she would be in touch. She didn't like to lie to her friend, but she didn't have much choice. We had to keep as many people as possible in the dark about what was going on. Even when Emmett called to ask how things were going, I lied to him and told him we were waiting it out to see what happens.

Seth and Leah, who were not as aware of the situation as the rest of us, were extremely happy to be going home. Leah wanted to see my mom and her friends, as soon as we got there.

Garrett had made the arrangements with the Florida police to start working on a trap and prepare for James. He wanted to split us up so that a few of us were with Felix and a few of us with him but I insisted on splitting even further. So he went with Kate and Leah, Felix took Seth with him, and Bella and I went another route.

Bella didn't like being separated from Seth and Leah, but she knew it was necessary. I got the impression she was more upset being split from them, then she ever was being away from me. But I understood why. She was a mother figure to them and always had been, so it had to have been hard on her.

Bella and I landed in New York and almost instantly boarded another plane for Arizona, then another to Washington.

Once we were finally at the Sea-Tac airport, we got off the plane and started searching all over for everyone else. Once Bella's eyes met with Leah and Seth's she started running to them. She fell to her knees and hugged them both tightly and cried. The rest of us stood around them watching. It felt a surge of joy rushing through me that hopefully all this would be over very soon and they would all be free.

We decided to stay in a nearby hotel for the night, instead of driving back to Forks so late. We all fell asleep rather quickly and didn't wake up until the early afternoon.

Garrett and Felix were in the hallway talking when I got up and I went out to see what was going on, they stopped talking.

"What's happening?" I asked.

"He was spotted in Texas," Garrett informed. "He's still driving straight there which means that he isn't aware we came back here. That's a good thing but our only problem is if someone close to us is tipping him off, we need to figure out who it is before they have the chance to tell him where we are."

"Well, we can hide out at my house until we know for sure or until he's caught, but I don't want Rosalie there."

"Edward," Bella alerted coming up behind me. "Rosalie is really nice to me. She talked to me a lot while I was away and helped me get through the days when I was away from you. She isn't the one tipping him off, in case that's what you are thinking. Please don't make her go away. I'd like to see her anyway."

"Bella, we have to be really careful who we talk to and who we see. I'm even thinking seeing Jasper or Alice is a bad idea," I said.

"I know you're concerned Edward, but I've been a prisoner for far too long and I don't want to be anymore," she informed.

I sighed heavily and took her in my arms. "Why do you always have to be so stubborn?"

"You're just as stubborn, you know?" She said. I laughed.

"If you think Rosalie is okay, then I'll trust your judgment, but I want all of us to stay hidden from the rest of the town until we know that James is captured. That includes Alice and Jasper for right now," I suggested. She agreed to that, as did Garrett and Felix.

We all got dressed and packed up, then Garrett rented us a van to head back to Forks.

When we pulled into the driveway at my parent's house later that afternoon, I saw my mom look through the window hesitantly. I stepped out of the car so she would know it was okay. As soon as she saw me her eyes bulged and she jerked the door open and came running out to me. She wrapped her arms around my neck and started crying.

"Hi, mom," I said, hugging her back.

"Oh, Edward, I was so worried about you," she sighed.

"I know and I'm sorry, but I had to go. I brought some people back with me who are really anxious to see you." She pulled away and stared at me with questioning eyes. I stepped to the side so she could see who was standing behind me. Tears of joy started running down her cheeks when she saw Seth, Leah and Bella standing there. She gasped and then stepped closer to them to pull them all into her arms.


	21. Chapter 20

**A/N: I don't have alot to say this time but if anyone donated to this: ( http://mskathyff (.) blogspot (.) com/search/label/charity ) that MsKathy set up, I did enter the first chapter of my next story I plan to write when this one is done. I am expecting to be done with this one by March and we were asked not to post our contributions until after March 1st so if anyone donated to it then look for mine :-). If not then I'll start my next story after March 1st.**

**Thanks for all the reviews everyone, I appreciate all the feedback.**

**Thanks bzeemomof4 and Redlulu for being so great with your help and suggestions. You both make this story so much better.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or its characters**

* * *

**My Wish: Rascal Flatts**

I hope the days come easy and the moments pass slow,  
And each road leads you where you want to go,  
And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,  
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.  
And if one door opens to another door closed,  
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,  
If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile,

But more than anything, more than anything,  
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,  
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,  
You never need to carry more than you can hold,  
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,  
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,  
Yeah, this, is my wish.

I hope you never look back, but ya never forget,  
All the ones who love you, in the place you left,  
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,  
And you help somebody every chance you get,  
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,  
And you always give more than you take.

But more than anything, yeah, and more than anything,  
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,  
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,  
You never need to carry more than you can hold,  
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,  
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,  
Yeah, this, is my wish.

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,  
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,  
You never need to carry more than you can hold,  
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,  
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,  
Yeah, this, is my wish.

This is my wish  
I hope you know somebody loves you  
May all your dreams stay big

**BPOV**

When we arrived back in Forks and pulled into the driveway at Edward's house, I could tell both Seth and Leah were excited. Unfortunately, I was nervous. I wasn't sure if she would allow us to stay once again. Edward sort of volunteered his house for us to stay while we hide out and hadn't really discussed it with either of his parent's. I wasn't sure if Emmett was still staying here, but if he was that meant Rose was as well. Which meant the house was going to be very full and I didn't know how Esme would feel about that.

Edward jumped out of the car first and Esme came running down the steps, bringing Edward into her arms. I stepped out hesitantly watching and waiting to see what Esme would think of us being back. Seth and Leah got out behind me and I held them back giving Edward and Esme a minute. I could feel the anticipation of being back in Esme's arms as well in Seth and Leah. They were itching to be released from me, so they could run to her.

Once Edward stepped to the side and she saw us standing there, I held my breath. I watched as tears began falling down her cheeks and she stepped the few feet closer to us bringing us all in for a hug. It was awkward with her trying to hug us all at the same time, but it was so nice to know that she accepted us back so easily.

"Mom, we need to hide out here for a while," Edward informed her. She pulled away from us and saw Aunt Kate and Garrett standing behind us.

"Your brother hasn't said anything. What's going on?" She asked turning back to Edward.

"James tried to follow me to Florida," he said. Esme gasped and raised her hand to her mouth. "He won't suspect that we would have come back here, so we need to hide out until he's caught. The Florida police are on the case and hopefully if all goes well they can obtain him. But we have to stay here and no one can know we're here. Is that okay?"

"Of course it is, son. I'll do whatever I have to, so that you are all safe," She agreed.

"Thanks, mom. We should get inside before anyone sees us," Edward suggested. He walked over to me, taking my hand in his and led us all inside.

"I've got to go check in at the station," Garrett said. "I'll be back later to check on everyone." I noticed he reached out to Kate's hand and squeezed it lightly before he left. I was getting the sense that things were getting better between them.

"Well, come in and sit down. Is anyone hungry or need anything to drink?" Esme asked, as we stepped inside.

We all shook our heads and went to sit in the living room.

"Thank you so much for letting us stay," Kate said.

"It's our pleasure. I've missed all of you tremendously. You're all welcome to stay as long as you like."

I sat down on the couch next to Edward leaning my head on his shoulder and his arm came up around my shoulders holding me to him protectively.

I kept telling myself that this whole ordeal was almost over. We would almost be free and not have to hide or run anymore. From what I was overhearing from Garrett and Felix's conversation with Edward this morning, they were closing in on James and it was only a matter of time before they found him. But with that thought brought another. What would happen after he was found? Would we have to go back to Florida? Would Edward come with me if we did? Or would I choose to stay here with him?

After a while, Seth busied himself with toys that were left behind and Leah went up to her old room to read for a while. Kate and Esme spent many hours chatting about random things and seemed to get along really well.

I glanced up at Edward who was leaning back on the couch almost asleep. I shifted to get up and his head shot up pulling me closer to him. "Where are you going?" He asked in a panicked tone.

"I was just going to make some coffee for everyone," I replied.

"Oh," he said letting out a long sigh and releasing his hold on me. "I'll come help you."

We got up and I noticed both Kate and Esme were giving us curious looks. I was sure they probably heard Edward's panic. I smiled at them both sheepishly. "I was going to make some coffee. Would either of you like some?"

"That would be lovely dear," Esme smiled.

"Thank you, Bella, I would love some," Kate added.

I nodded my head and walked towards the kitchen. Edward was right behind me with his hand on my back.

I started filling up the coffee pot with water and I asked Edward to get the coffee out of the cupboard. He brought it over to me and as I started to pour the scoops into the filter he wrapped his arms around my waist from behind. I smiled and leaned back against him. He leaned down and kissed the back of my neck.

"It's almost over, Bella. You'll be free soon," he whispered.

"We'll all be free," I added. I turned around in his arms and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him down to kiss his lips. We kissed fully and after a few seconds I felt Edward lift me off the ground and place me on the counter. He lifted my shirt just enough to slide his hand in across my stomach. "Edward," I warned, pushing his hands away. "Your mother and my aunt are in the next room." He smiled sheepishly and took a couple steps back.

"Sorry," he said. "I've missed you though. I need you."

"Not now," I whispered. He huffed. I hoped he wasn't serious. There was no way that was going to happen anytime soon. Not with so many people in the house.

"We'll find a way," he assured with a smirk. I rolled my eyes and shook my head, but I couldn't help but smile.

I hopped off the counter and started pulling coffee cups from the cupboard when I saw a car pull into the driveway. I looked out the window to get a better look at the red car pulling in.

"Oh great," I heard Edward grumble from behind me.

"Who is it?" I asked.

"That would be Rosalie," he answered. I smiled when I heard it was her. I had gotten to know her quite well over the phone the last couple months and I was excited to see her. Emmett's jeep pulled in a few seconds later and I saw both Emmett and Garrett get out. Edward took off out the front door. I assumed to be sure Garrett had filled them in on the arrangement and they knew not to tell anyone. I knew Edward had his suspicions about Rose, but I felt like I could trust her.

I filled the cups with coffee and put them on the tray with the cream and sugar, then brought the tray out to the living room. Esme and Kate both grabbed a cup and thanked me for it just as everyone else stepped through the front door. Everyone started greeting each other.

I looked up and saw Rose smile. Seth came running into the living room and ran to Emmett and Rosalie came and gave me a hug.

"Welcome home, Bella," she said. "It's good to see you again, even if my future brother-in-law is an idiot for going to get you when a psycho killer is after him."

"Brother-in-law… you and Emmett are getting married?" I asked.

"Not yet, he hasn't asked, but we've talked about it a little," she clarified. "I'm hoping he will soon. I think once this case is over, maybe he will."

"That's great. I'm happy for you," I offered.

"What are you two talking about over here?" Emmett asked, coming up behind Rose and wrapping his arms around her.

"We were just discussing the future," Rosalie replied, patting his cheek with her hand. I smiled at them, then caught Edward's eye who was watching me intently from across the room.

"It's nice to have you back, Bella," Emmett said. "Maybe now my brother won't mope around the house anymore." I gave him a weak smile and noticed Edward was starting to walk towards us. He leaned down to my ear.

"Are you okay?" he whispered. I nodded my head and patted him on the shoulder. I was fine, but bringing up the fact that Edward was moping while I was gone made me feel extremely guilty. I caused that pain in him and I didn't like that.

"Well, I think we should figure out something for dinner tonight and also sleeping arrangements for everyone," Esme announced.

"I'll help with dinner, Esme," I offered. She nodded her head and we headed towards the kitchen. Leah came downstairs shortly after and came into the kitchen to help as well. Esme decided to make up everything we would need for tacos. It was something everyone would enjoy and also something rather quick and simple with so many people helping to prepare it.

Carlisle pulled into the driveway shortly before dinner was ready. He was rather shocked when he walked in to a full house of people. He was happy to see all of us and made sure we were all aware that we were welcome to stay as long as we liked.

Once we all sat down to eat, people started conversing casually with each other. I was so extremely happy to be back here among all the people I truly cared about. This is where I felt safe and loved. It's not that I didn't think Aunt Kate didn't care about us, but to me, this was home.

"It's nice to see everyone so happy," Rosalie observed. "The last few days Esme and Carlisle have been a wreck. I felt so bad for them stressing the way they were."

Edward scoffed at her words. "Yeah two days compared to two months is such a tragedy."

"Well, Edward, you could have saved everyone a lot of stress if you would have told us what you were up to," Rosalie scolded.

"And why exactly would I tell anyone at this table what I was doing?" he asked, staring straight at Rosalie. I put my hand on his knee and whispered his name, begging him to not start anything. "So someone can run off and tell James what the plan is and where they are."

"You think someone here is tipping James off?" Emmett asked. Edward and Rosalie stared each other down and I was pretty sure everyone could feel the tension.

"Are you trying to insinuate something?" Rosalie asked.

"Are you trying to own up to something?" Edward retorted, glaring at her now.

"Edward, knock it off," Emmett demanded.

"What's going on?" Carlisle asked.

"Edward, please don't do this," I begged, louder.

"I can't believe you, Edward. I might not be the easiest person to get along with. But I never…" Rosalie stopped. I could see tears filling her eyes. She sighed and looked towards me. "Bella, I wouldn't do that to you." I gaped at her. I hadn't known her very long and most of what I did know about her was through phone conversations, but I never imagined she would get this upset about Edward making accusations against her that had to do with me. She jumped up from her chair and ran towards the back door.

"Edward, what the hell…" Emmett shouted.

"Why did you do that?" I shouted as well.

"I don't trust her," he said, staring down at his plate. Everyone at the table was looking back and forth between the three of us.

Garrett placed his hand on Edwards back and he flinched away. "Just calm down, Edward, everything will be fine."

I heard him huff and shake his head slightly. I got out of my chair and Edward grabbed my arm. "Where are you going?"

I'm going to check on Rosalie," I said, angrily. "I know you think she's a traitor, but I don't." He let go of my arm and I walked out towards the back door. Rosalie was sitting on the edge of the deck with her head in her hands. She heard me coming up behind her and turned around brushing at her tears. I went and sat down next to her.

"Bella, you have to believe me. I would never do that to you or Edward. I love Emmett and I could never cause him or his family pain like that."

"I know Rosalie." I said. "I never suspected you."

"I know I might not be the easiest person to get along with, but I do care about everyone in this family and that includes you and your brother and sister." She clarified. "Why would he even think something like that?"

"Rosalie, it's not just you. He's paranoid right now and doesn't trust anyone. I think he even suspects his own family. He's only trying to protect us. We've been apart for two months and he doesn't want there to ever be a reason for us to be apart again."

"You really do love him, don't you?" She asked, smirking at me. I nodded my head. "Emmett does the same thing. When I say or do something stupid he is always there trying to defend me or justify it somehow. You do the same thing for Edward." I smiled sheepishly.

"You know before he started talking to me, I thought he was arrogant and I didn't want anything to do with him. Granted, I was extremely attracted to him, but I didn't think he was that great of a guy because he portrayed this untouchable, I'm better than everyone, image. I was so sure that he'd end up breaking my heart or using me, so it took me a long time to see him for who he really is. I think the same thing goes for you. You portray something you're not, but once you let someone get to know you, like Emmett and I have, you aren't that type of person. I think, once you and Edward get to know each other better, you'll realize you're both very similar." She smiled and nodded her head.

"You are probably the only friend I have that's a girl. Everyone that I'm surrounded by on a daily basis, are men, and you're right I do put on an image, so I appear to be stronger and self reliant, so I don't get stepped on, but I should be nicer to the people I care about."

"Just give Edward a chance, please?" I pleaded. "I'll talk to him about not jumping to conclusions too."

She nodded her head and reached out to give me a hug. We stood up to head back in the house and stopped when we saw Edward standing in the window watching us intently. We both started laughing.

"See, I told you, he's paranoid," I said.

She placed her arm around my shoulders and we started walking to the door once again. "I don't know how you deal with that," she whispered. I smiled to myself because honestly, I liked that he was so protective of me. I knew, no matter what, he would never give up on me and I wouldn't on him.

Once we were back in the house, Edward pulled me to his side and put his arm around my waist possessively. "I'm sorry Rosalie," he slurred. She rolled her eyes at him and headed into the kitchen where Esme was.

"Edward, please stop," I begged. "I know you're worried, but you can't go around accusing people of stuff when you have no proof. Just because you don't like her doesn't mean she's giving James information. Just let it go for now. I don't want Seth or Leah to be scared of anyone in this house."

He sighed heavily, looking down at me. He placed his hands on my arms. "Why are you so sure she's trustworthy?"

"I'm not, but you don't know her like I do. I don't think she would do something that horrible when she loves your brother as much as she does. She wouldn't risk that," I explained. "Edward, you don't even know if there is someone who's tipping him off and honestly I don't think anyone is. James is smart, he knows what people are thinking and he has connections everywhere. Why do you think I was so afraid to leave? When we left with my mom, he found us so quickly and my mom was so sure she had covered our tracks, so he wouldn't find us, but he did. I know him better than anyone in this house and I don't think he's working with anyone else. Just please leave Rosalie alone."

"Fine, if it's what you want, I'll leave her alone. But that doesn't mean I trust her completely."

"I never asked you to trust her," I agreed. "I only ask that you stop making accusations until they're warranted." He nodded his head, sucking in a sharp breath through his teeth.

"Thank you." I reached up and kissed him gently on the lips before heading into the kitchen to help clean up the dinner dishes with Esme and Rosalie.

For three days we hid out at the house. Everyone was allowed to leave and do their own things every day except for me, Seth, Leah, Kate, and Edward. Even though Felix was told he could come and go as he pleased considering no one would recognize him or question his involvement with us, he stayed close to the house. His job was to protect us and he took his job seriously.

For the most part we didn't do much of anything. We watched TV, played games, Edward played around with the piano or his guitar quite a bit, most of the time we didn't even get out of pajamas.

Since it was spring break, Esme was home most of the time as well and she and Kate spent many days chatting. They both had a passion for interior design and they talked a lot about decorating ideas. Rose joined them on occasion, but she was gone a lot for her job.

I liked that Rosalie was here to talk to though. I liked spending time with her, even if Edward didn't trust her. She was always nice to me, for the most part anyway. She still made snide remarks once in a while, but they didn't bother me the way they bothered Edward. It was just her and I know she didn't mean anything hurtful by the things she said.

On Saturday afternoon, Edward and I were sitting on the couch watching TV, still in our pajamas, when we heard Emmett and Garrett in the kitchen talking. It sounded serious and I could instantly tell Edward was curious.

"I'll be right back," he said standing from the couch. He headed into the kitchen and as hard as I tried, I couldn't hear what was going on. When I heard Edward laughing loudly my curiosity got the better of me, so I hopped up and walked towards the kitchen slowly. I didn't want to intrude if it was something private.

As soon as I peaked around the corner I saw Edward with his back to me laughing so joyously, I was sort of shocked. He sounded so happy and excited. Garrett noticed me and nodded towards me with a smile. All three of them seemed happy. My eyebrows furrowed with confusion. Edward turned when he noticed Garrett nod towards me.

"Bella," he said excitedly. He dashed across the kitchen and scooped me up into his arms. "It's over."

"What's over?" I asked.

He put me down and placed his hands on my cheeks leaning in to kiss me quickly on the lips. "They caught him. He was at the airport asking questions and an undercover cop was alerted of it. He's in jail baby. You're free. We're all free." He laughed excitedly.

"They arrested him?" I asked in surprise. He nodded his head. I glanced towards Garrett and Emmett and they both nodded their heads as well.

A huge smile spread across my face before wrapping my arms around Edward's neck. I was practically squealing with excitement.

We stood there for so long just holding each other and letting the happiness sweep over us.

"What's going on?" Carlisle asked, coming into the kitchen.

"They found James," Emmett replied. "He was arrested in Florida, they'll be extraditing him back to Washington in just a few days and the state will take over to build a case against him for murder. He may face charges for the murder of Victoria in Arizona as well. It looks like James is going to be put away for a very long time."

Edward pulled away from me to glance over at his dad. Carlisle patted Edward on the back. "That's great news. Now maybe we can all get back to our normal lives. Bella, I'm so glad that you trusted us enough to help you." I nodded and smiled at him politely. But my thoughts were on what he said before.

Our normal lives? What did that mean? I was sure Kate would want to go back to Florida, to her home and her job. She'd take Seth and Leah with her. I'd have to go with them. Would Edward come with me?

"Come on," Edward said, grabbing my hand.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

He smiled crookedly. "It's a surprise." He began pulling me towards the front door. I pulled back on his hand to stop him.

"Can I at least get dressed first?" I asked. He looked down and noticed we were both still in pajamas.

"Oh, right. I guess we should both get dressed," he laughed.

He let go of my hand and I headed up stairs to get dressed. Leah stopped me at the top of the stairs and she must have noticed the smile on my face since she was eying me warily.

"They caught him, Leah," I said, once I was at the top of the stairs with her. "He's in jail and he can't hurt us anymore." She began crying and fell into my arms.

"Are you sure, he's really gone for good?" She asked, through her sobs.

"Yes, Leah, he's not coming back."

"Can I tell Seth?" She asked.

"You can tell anyone you want," I replied. "We don't have to hide anymore." She hugged me again tightly before running down the hall to tell Seth.

I got dressed quickly, in casual clothes, I wasn't sure what Edward was up to, but I assumed it wasn't going to be anything too fancy since he seemed to be in such a hurry earlier.

I headed back down stairs when I was finished and noticed almost everyone in the living room laughing and talking joyously. By now everyone had heard the news about James being arrested.

I walked in and went straight to Edward's side who was talking to Emmett. He wrapped an arm around my waist instinctively and pulled me close to him. He didn't even need to look to see if it was me. He just knew that I was there somehow.

"We're all heading out soon to celebrate the good news at the diner," Esme chimed in. "Would all of you like to come?"

"Rose and I will come, mom," Emmett replied.

"Great," she said. "What about you Edward? Are you and Bella going to join us?"

"Bella and I have somewhere to go first," he was smiling so big. "But we'll meet you there in about an hour." I don't know if I've ever seen him this happy since I've known him.

'Alright," she said hesitantly. "You kids have fun and don't be too late," she said with a soft smile. Edward leaned in and kissed her gently on the cheek.

"Don't worry mom," I could hear him whisper. She patted him on the cheek before walking towards the rest of the group.

"It's going to take mom some time to adjust to this freedom again. She's still going to worry for a while," Emmett observed, watching his mom walk across the room.

"I know Emmett," Edward said. "We won't be gone for very long and we aren't going far. We'll see you at the diner in a little while." Edward reached down, lacing our fingers together and lead us outside. I waved to everyone as we left. It was nice to finally be outside again.

He opened the car door for me and I slid into the seat. It had been so long since I've been in this car. He jumped into his seat and I could tell he was excited about something. He started backing out of the driveway and headed out on the road.

"So, where are we going," I attempted to ask again. He smirked and shook his head. I huffed and crossed my arms over my chest in protest, but he didn't like that. So he reached over and loosened my grip lacing his fingers with mine and bringing my hand up to his lips. He kissed the back of my hand gently many times before resting our intertwined fingers on his leg. There was a permanent smile plastered on his face. I loved seeing that smile.

We drove only a short distance before pulling into a driveway in front of a large house. It was bigger than the Cullen's home. "Where are we?" I asked.

"You'll see," he smirked.

He walked around and opened my door for me taking my hand once again to lead me up the path. I looked around trying to understand where we were. There were no signs anywhere suggesting it was a restaurant or museum. It looked like a place that someone rich lived.

We walked up to the front door and Edward rang the doorbell. I kept glancing at him trying to get some sort of clue to what this was about, but he was hiding whatever it was.

After only a few seconds I heard someone start unlocking the door and swing it open. I was surprised by the person who was on the other side of the door. I smiled instantly and Alice squealed launching herself at me. I could hear Edward chuckle beside us.

"Bella, you're home," Alice shrieked. "Why are you here? The last I heard, Edward was on his way to Florida to see you. Now you're both back? What happened?"

"Well…" I began.

"Wait," Alice interrupted. "Come in and sit down first. Then I want to hear everything."

She stepped to the side and let us in. We sat down on the couch just as Jasper came around the corner. He gaped at us for a minute. "What's going on?" He added.

Edward and I explained everything to them and they were both awestruck with what happened.

"So, what happens now?" Alice asked.

"He'll be sent back here and the case will be built against him for murder and hopefully he'll be put in jail for a very long time," Edward explained.

"Wow," Alice expressed. "So does that mean you're back for good and you'll start coming to school again?" I ducked my head and sighed.

"Yeah, we're back, Alice," Edward answered, with a smile, pulling me closer to his side. Alice noticed my hesitation and instantly asked me to come upstairs so she could show me her prom dress as an excuse.

When we were in her room she shut the door and turned on me. "What's going on? I would think you would be happy that James was caught and you don't have to run or hide anymore."

"I am happy Alice. You have no idea how happy I am," I replied.

"Then what's wrong?"

I sighed and sat down in a chair. "Alice, I don't know what to do. My aunt is going to want to go back to Florida soon and she'll take Seth and Leah with her. I can't let them go alone. They don't want to be there in the first place and if I abandon them they'll hate me for it. But I can't leave Edward again."

"Is he pressuring you to stay here?" Alice questioned.

"No not at all. Actually, he told me when we were in Florida that he would stay there to be with me," I answered.

"Then what's the problem? If Edward is willing to follow you to Florida then let him. He was a mess when you were gone and I know you weren't that great either, even though you tried to hide it. You both need to be together. I don't know what I'd do if I was separated from Jasper," Alice thought aloud.

"But is it fair of me to ask him to follow me? I can't give up my family, why should I expect him to? I don't want his family to resent me for making him move away from them. And what if Edward begins to resent me for taking him away from his family and friends?"

"Bella," she said, coming to sit next to me on the chair. "Edward loves you. If he wants to follow you then that's his choice. Let him decide what he wants. I don't think he would resent you if he made the choice to go." She put an arm around my shoulders and rubbed my arm. I smiled weakly at her and nodded my head, letting her know I understood what she was saying.

There was a light knock on the door and Edward stepped in. "Bella, are you ready to go?" He asked. I nodded my head and stood up. We headed back downstairs and I gave Alice a huge hug before we left. She whispered in my ear that everything will be okay, but I was still worried.

When we were back out by Edward's car I stopped him and hugged him tightly. "Thank you."

"For what," he chuckled.

"For bringing me to see Alice, I've missed her a lot and it was nice to be able to see her." He pulled me closer to him and kissed the top of my head.

"I thought this would be the first place you would want to go. I had been trying to figure out some way to get her and Jasper over to the house so you could visit with her, but someone was always around. They wouldn't have let them come in."

"Well, now I can visit her any time I want," I declared.

"He pulled me into his arms again kissing me briefly on the lips. "That's absolutely right. You don't have to be afraid anymore."

I wrapped my fingers around his neck and pulled his lips down to mine, kissing him hard. "I love you, Edward."

"Love you too," He stated. "Now let's get to the diner before everyone starts wondering where we are."

We got in the car and drove the short distance to the diner. When we walked in everyone was in the back banquet room. They were joined by a few other locals who had heard the news of James' arrest. Everyone was in high spirits, laughing and talking loudly. We were bombarded by hugs and friendly faces. It was nice to see so many people that cared once again. We sat down with the group and ordered from the menu.

"So, what do you want to do tomorrow?" Edward asked. I shrugged my shoulders.

"I really couldn't say. I don't care what we do as long as we're together."

"I was thinking maybe we could spend the day in Seattle. Maybe take Seth and Leah with us. None of us have had a very fun spring break, so we should go do something fun before it's over."

"That's sounds like a good idea. What will we do in Seattle?"

"I was thinking maybe going to the zoo. I know how much Leah likes animals and I think Seth would have a lot of fun. It's supposed to be a nice day too," he added.

"That's sounds great," I accepted.

"Seth," Edward shouted. He came running over to us. "How would you like to go to the zoo tomorrow with me and Bella?"

"Really…?" He asked excitedly. Edward nodded his head.

Go ask your aunt Kate if it's okay and see if Leah wants to come as well," Edward demanded. He ran off to talk to Kate and after a couple seconds we saw Kate glance over at us nodding her head with a smile. Seth started jumping up and down as he told Leah about it and her face brightened with excitement. I smiled at them and glanced down at my plate that had barely been touched.

"Are you okay?" Edward asked, reaching across the table to take my hand.

"I'm fine," I replied, my voice almost squeaking. He nodded his head slowly.

"Is there a reason why you're lying to me?" He questioned. My head shot up to meet his eyes.

"What makes you think I'm lying?"

"I know you pretty well Bella. It's not hard to notice. Just tell me what's wrong?"

I ducked my head. "What do you plan to do?" I blurted.

"About what…?"

"When we have to go back to Florida," I answered, meeting his eyes.

"Bella, you're not going back to Florida. You're staying here with me."

"Edward, I can't. My brother and sister need me and I think my aunt needs me too. I want to be with you Edward, but I don't think I can stay here."

His eyebrows furrowed and he looked at me warily. "Bella, didn't your aunt tell you?"

"Tell me what?"

"She's planning to move back here," he clarified. I glanced over at Kate with questioning eyes. She was sitting next to Garrett and he had his arm draped across her shoulders as they talked animatedly with Emmett and Rose.

"I can't believe that. She loves Florida. She'd be leaving her job and her home. There's no possible way she would do that," I expressed.

"Ask her yourself. I believe she may have even talked with my mom about helping to find a house in the area to buy," he added. "And I'm pretty sure your aunt loves you, Seth, and Leah a little more than her job and her house." I smiled sheepishly. "Go ask her. I need to go talk to my parent's about tomorrow anyway." We got up from the table we were sitting at and headed in different directions across the room.

"Aunt Kate, can I talk to you?" I asked coming up to the table.

"Sure Bella," she said, standing from the table to follow me to a secluded area of the room.

"Edward told me you were thinking of moving back here?" I questioned cautiously.

She smiled sweetly. "Actually, I have been thinking about it. I was planning to discuss it with all three of you, but there just hasn't seemed to be a good time."

"What about your job and your house?" I asked. "Your whole life is in Florida."

"I can buy another house. My company has been pushing me to move to the Seattle branch for years and I've always turned them down. Now I think it's time for me to finally accept the offer and move back."

"Does that mean we'll be moving to Seattle?" I asked. Seattle would be better than Florida. At least Edward and I wouldn't be too far away.

"I was actually thinking it would be best to move here. Most of my work can be done at home and I can travel into Seattle a few times each week for meetings or presentations. I've already contacted a real estate agent who's going to help us find a house in the area."

I was so sure she would want to go back to Florida. All of the information from today was so overwhelming. First James was caught and now I wasn't going to have to leave Edward or my family. Everything seemed so perfect all of a sudden. "Does this have to do with Garrett?"

"No, this has to do with my nieces and my nephew. I should have never ripped all of you from the only home you ever knew when you had so many other things going on. All of this is too much for anyone to handle. Let alone a child. Garrett kept telling me for months that it was best for all of you to stay in Florida even though I tried to argue with him about it. I could see how unhappy all of you were. I know you missed Edward. I knew better than anyone what you were feeling, especially when he started to pull away from you."

"I could see how much Leah was hurting. She's lived a scary life. She's witnessed it all since birth and when she finally found a place that was safe and someone she felt loved her, I came in and took that away. I did the same thing to Seth. I never should have done that to any of you. I know now why Garrett wanted all of you to stay with me in Florida, but now that James is caught, you're free to do what you want."

"You have been a mother figure to Seth and Leah for a very long time. I want you to decide what is best for all three of you. If you want to stay here, then that's fine. I'm hoping you will still allow me to be a part of your life and we can try to build a family here. But if you would rather live with the Cullen's or on your own maybe, then that's fine too. I've already talked to Esme and she would be happy to let all of you stay with them as long as you like if that's what you want."

She watched me, waiting for me to make a decision. But I had promised Leah we would make decisions together. I had to talk to her and Seth to find out what they wanted. "Aunt Kate, thank you so much for taking into consideration what we need and wanting me to be the one to make that decision, but I need to talk to Seth and Leah and find out what they want."

"I thought you might say that. That's why I gave permission for all of you to go to the zoo tomorrow with Edward. Plus, I think it would be good for all of you to get out for the day," she added.

I nodded my head and she reached out giving me a hug.

"By the way, I really like Edward. I can tell he cares about you a lot and he seems like a really good kid. You chose a good guy to fall in love with."

"I didn't choose him, he chose me," I said regrettably. I couldn't give up anything for him, but he was willing to give up everything for me. He gave up his freedom, his safety, quite possibly even his life, if it came to that. And then when I had to leave he was willing to give up school, football, his family, his future, all of it just to be with me.

She reached out to my hand and patted it sweetly. "He loves you Bella, he doesn't expect anything except for you to love him in return." I sighed to myself. I did love him. More than anything, but I needed to give him more. I needed to support him and give to him for a change.

Later that night, when Edward and I were cuddled up on the couch, I told him he was right. He was quick to tell me 'told you so', but he was happy. I had yet to talk to Seth and Leah though. I knew Kate was going to want an answer soon, but I had no idea what to choose.

All that night I was restless, I knew if it were up to Leah, she'd stay with Esme and Carlisle. Seth would want to stay where there was a male figure which would be with the Cullen's. Edward, I assumed would want me to stay wherever he was. But Kate would be all alone. I didn't want to abandon her when she was doing so much for all of us. She was essentially giving up the only life she's known for the past fourteen years just so we didn't have to give up ours.

The next morning, we left quite early. Edward wanted to beat the crowd since it was in fact the last day of summer vacation and it was suppose to be a beautiful day.

Once we got off the ferry, we stopped for breakfast then headed on our way to the Zoo. We walked through the zoo and looked at all the exhibits. Seth was in awe and Leah was trying to take everything in. She had such a love for animals and it showed so much when she looked at each of the animals. Edward and I followed behind them hand in hand. It was strange, being able to be with him without a chaperone of some sorts. We weren't technically alone since Seth and Leah were still with us but in a way were all alone. We were free and didn't have to look behind our backs constantly wondering if James was following us.

"Bella, what's wrong now?" Edward asked, suddenly as we walked to the next exhibit.

I sighed heavily, knowing there was no point in trying to hide what I was thinking. "Kate asked me to decide where we should live. She said that we could stay with Esme or with her. I know Seth and Leah are going to want to stay with Esme and Carlisle and you will want me to stay with you also, but I feel guilty abandoning Kate. She is our aunt and she's giving up so much to stay here with us. I don't know what to do Edward," I whined.

He stopped me and turned me towards him. "Bella, what do you want?"

"I want everyone to be happy," I replied.

"Okay, then let me ask you this," he began. "If you live with your aunt, are we still going to be together? Will we still be happy?"

"Of course we will," I said quickly. "As long as you want to be I mean." He smirked and pulled me into his arms.

"Are Seth and Leah going to still have a relationship with my family if they live a few miles away from them?" I nodded my head. "And if you chose to live with us would you still be able to have a relationship with your aunt?" I nodded my head again. "Then stop worrying about everyone's happiness. Do what you think is best for all of you."

He was right, I needed to stop stressing about it and just make a decision. I decided I needed to finally talk to Seth and Leah and find out what they wanted to do. I asked them to sit down on a bench to explain the whole thing to them. Edward took a walk, giving us some privacy.

I was surprised when Leah told _me_ to make the decision. Normally she always wanted to have a say.

"Bella, as long as we get to stay here and we don't have to go back to Florida, then I don't care who we live with."

"Me either," Seth added. "As long as I can still spend time with Edward and Emmett, then I don't care."

"Then I think it would good for us to live with Kate. I think she deserves for us to give her a chance. She's done so much for us and it would only be fair. We can still visit with the Cullen's and spend time with all of them," I offered. They both nodded their heads in agreement and I took a sigh of relief. This was a lot easier than I thought it would be.

We caught up to Edward and finished our way through the zoo. When we returned home, I told Kate what we decided and she was so extremely happy. She wanted to go house hunting with all of us as soon as possible.

The following day, Felix left. Since James was in jail there was no purpose to have a bodyguard anymore. He left in a taxi and we were all sad to see him go. But he had someone else to protect now and he took his job seriously.

Kate planned to leave at the end of the week to go back to Florida and get everything packed up and work out the arrangements with her job. But first she wanted us to get back into school and she wanted to do some house searching.

On Monday, Edward and I headed towards Forks high school, like we used to. I was nervous, like always, but I was so happy to be back.

We walked in hand in hand and every single person stared at us with open mouths and wide eyes. Edward smirked the entire time. I think he got pleasure in shocking people and making them all stare at him.

We walked towards Alice and Jasper and when Alice spotted us, she ran down the hall and wrapped her arms around me in excitement.

"I'm so glad you're back. I've missed you so much," she expressed.

"I'm glad we're back too," I added.

"You have to come over some time now. We have so much to catch up on."

"I'd like that Alice."

As the day went by and I had teachers and classmates tell me how happy they were to see me back, it felt like a huge weight had been lifted from me. Everyone was happy, everyone was free. I could finally be free.

Every day that week, Kate took us to a new house to look at. She wanted us to be a part of the search. Every house we looked at would have been fine. But the problem was that Kate was very picky. She found something wrong with all of them. I had a feeling we were never going to find a house.

As Edward and I drove towards yet another house to look at with Kate, after school on Friday, I noticed an old truck parked on the side of the road. I knew exactly what truck that was.

"Edward, stop," I shouted. He jerked his head towards me in shock.

"What's wrong?" He asked, in a panicked tone.

"Just stop, please." He pulled over on the side of the road and I walked over to the truck. I was overjoyed when I noticed it had a 'for sale' sign in the window. I walked around it and touched it, remembering all the times I road in this old truck.

"Bella, what's going on?" Edward asked.

"Can I help you kids?" A man asked, stepping out of his garage.

"How much do you want for this?" I asked. I noticed Edward eying me suspiciously.

"Oh, not much," he said. It doesn't run and I'm not so sure it can be saved. It would be better used for parts."

"I'll give you $500 for it," I offered.

"Deal," he accepted. "I've been trying to get rid of this thing for months. But like I said it doesn't run so you'll need a tow truck to get it out of here."

"Great," I said with a huge smile. "I can bring the money by tomorrow and I think I know someone who has a tow truck."

"That'll be fine. I look forward to seeing you tomorrow." I shook his hand then headed back to the car with Edward.

"What was that about?" Edward asked, once we were both inside his car.

"Rosalie will help me get it tomorrow and maybe she can even get it running again," I said, ignoring his question.

"You don't even know how to drive Bella. What are you going to do with an old truck that can't run?" He asked.

"I can learn to drive. You could teach me even. If you're willing to," I suggested.

"Well of course I can teach you if you really want to learn, but what is with this sudden purchase of an old truck?" He wondered.

"You made me promise you months ago that I would buy myself something I wanted. I just fulfilled that promise," I clarified.

"But why an old truck, that doesn't run? You could have bought something a little newer. I would have bought you a car even. Why did you want that truck?" He asked.

"It was my moms," I answered, quietly.

"Your moms," he repeated.

"James made her get rid of it when they got married. I want it back." He didn't question me any more after that.

We drove the rest of the way to the house and met Kate there with Seth and Leah. The real estate agent showed us around and finally, I think Kate was happy with what she saw.

When we left, Kate told the real estate agent we would have to think about it and get back to her in a few days. I knew Kate was planning to go back to Florida tomorrow so I'm sure she wanted to get all of that worked out before she did anything major here.

I told her about the truck and I couldn't believe how excited she was. I wondered if maybe she was more excited than me. She offered to pay for any repairs that it needed and once we left, she drove directly to the DMV and picked up the book so I could study the driving test. She said that she would be happy to teach me to drive. I was so ecstatic, everything was falling into place. Everything was perfect.

The next morning Kate left for Florida and we stayed with the Cullen's. It was like old times. We were all back in our old rooms and our routines were back to what they were before.

Emmett had moved back to his apartment so I had to call Rose and ask if she could help me out later with getting the truck. She was happy to help and was actually very excited that I wanted her to work on it so it would hopefully run again. As soon as we got it in the driveway, she started inspecting the engine, making mental notes of what it needed and things she could do to fix it up. Emmett was helping her and making suggestions. I sort of got the impression Rosalie was more irritated with his help, but she loved him so she accepted it.

Since they were busy working on the car, Edward decided that I needed my first driving lesson. I shook my head profusely at him at first. "I don't have a permit Edward. I can't drive yet."

"My brother's a cop, he won't say anything," he said. "Besides, we're just going to an empty parking lot. You won't hurt anything." I sighed heavily, giving in.

We drove to an abandoned building at the far edge of town. He parked the car in the parking lot and got out. We traded places and I sat behind the wheel. I was shaking so bad. My heart was beating so fast and my breathing was accelerated.

Edward reached out and placed a hand on mine. "Baby, relax," he whispered. "It's not that hard." I took a deep breath trying to calm myself. "Now, start the car." I did as he said and started it up. "Put it in drive and release your foot from the brake then slowly press on the gas." I did exactly as he instructed and slowly the car started moving forward. "See, you're driving." I felt euphoric in that moment. It was such an awesome feeling to be able to do something so normal and freeing. I couldn't help but smile and I could feel the tears of joy stinging my eyes.

I circled around that parking lot for hours. He had me learn how to reverse and how to park. I listened very carefully to every instruction he gave me and tried to do my best. I messed up a lot, but he never got upset or told me I was doing it wrong. He would just say 'let's try it again'. After three hours of practicing, I parked the car and Edward took over. He didn't drive though. He just sat there and stared at the steering wheel. He looked sad.

"What's wrong, Edward."

"I got letters from a couple colleges this week," he replied.

"Did you get in?" I asked. He nodded his head. "Then why do you seem upset about it?"

"I got accepted to Harvard and Dartmouth," he clarified. "They want me for my academics, not for football. I can still play football there, but I wanted to play for a good school."

"Edward, it's still early. You could get into other schools. Those aren't the only ones to choose from."

"What about my parents though?" He questioned. "They're both so excited for me. They want me to go to an Ivy League school so bad. My dad went to Harvard and it's his dream for me to follow in his footsteps. They both want me to be a doctor."

"What do you want Edward?" I asked. He turned his head to look at me with questioning eyes. "You always ask me what I want. Now I'm asking you. What do _you_ want for _your_ life?"

"I want to be something my parents can be proud of, but I want to play football also. I don't want school to be my only focus. Wherever I go, I want to know that you'll be able to go with me. I want to be with you, more than anything."

My heart swelled at his words. He wanted me to go with him. I had never thought about going with him to college, but now I couldn't imagine being anywhere else but with him. It was always about my family before. Keeping them safe, making sure they were happy and protected. But now that I knew they would be and that they would be happy here with Kate, Garrett and the Cullen's, I needed to start thinking more about my future and what I wanted. Edward was my future and I needed to make sacrifices for him like he always had for me. "Wherever you go, if you want me to come, I'll follow."

"But I want you to go to college too, I want us to go to the same school," he said.

"I don't think I'll be able to get into either of those schools. Plus, I think it's too late to apply. But I'll go either way. I can get a job and work real hard at a community college or something and apply next year."

He smiled at me and pulled me into his arms. "I love you Bella, so much."

"I love you too." He leaned down and began kissing me deeply. It had been so long since we had been able to be this passionate with each other. There was always someone around. He began pulling my shirt up rubbing his hand up and down on the skin of my back. I was pulling myself closer to him across the console in between the seats. I wanted to feel him close to me.

He broke the kiss briefly to reach down and push his seat back as far as it would go. Then he guided me over the console to sit on his lap.

He began rubbing my thighs with his hands and I was suddenly thankful I chose to wear a skirt today. I didn't know why I did, I never wore skirts unless forced to, but for some reason today I did.

I tangled my fingers in his hair pulling him closer to me. Our lips consumed each other fully. We both needed this so badly. I didn't care if we were in a car in an empty parking lot. All I knew is I needed him. He began massaging my clothed breasts just as I began to suck on the skin of his neck. I reached down, removing his shirt from his pants and pulling it off of him. My fingers raked across his bare chest and I sat back slightly to take in the sight of his beautiful body that I had missed so much since I had been gone.

He looked deep into my eyes, breathing heavily. He placed his hands on each side of my face and pulled my lips back to his. His tongue grazed against my lips, asking for permission to enter. I opened my mouth allowing him in. His tongue gently massaged mine consuming every part of my mouth.

I reached down and started undoing his belt and unzipping his pants. He arched slightly as I did this, freeing himself from the confines of his pants.

I pulled off of him slightly to remove my panties. He watched me intently as I did this. I smiled at him confidently before sitting back down on his lap. We started kissing again and he started trailing kisses down my neck and shoulder. He unbuttoned the top three buttons of my blouse and sufficiently unhooked my bra giving him better access to my breasts. He pulled and tugged on them with his mouth. My head fell back in the sensation of it.

I arched my hips closer to him, wanting him inside of me. We began kissing again. I rubbed against him a few times, allowing him entrance if he wanted it.

"Bella," he said through kisses. "We can't." I sat back slightly, looking at him with a confused look. He was telling me no? I know he wanted this. Why was he saying no? What did I do wrong? "I don't have a condom."

I smiled, feeling a sense of relief. I leaned down to him and kissed him briefly on the lips. "It's okay Edward. I'm on birth control, remember?"

"It's still good? Everything is fine?" He questioned. I nodded my head, knowing that his worries were unwarranted. "I've never done this without a condom."

I leaned in kissing him once again. He wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me closer. "Neither have I," I whispered.

He let out a soft moan and arched his hips, filling me completely. I cried out in pleasure and started rocking back and forth. We moaned and sighed together as the pleasure of being connected once again consumed us. "I love you so much Bella. I don't ever want to be apart from you," Edward breathed, making me rock and thrust my hips harder. "Promise me you'll never leave me again."

"I promise, Edward. We'll always be together," I said, breathlessly. With that we both came together in intense pleasure. It was overwhelming and we sat there still wrapped around each other, trying to catch our breaths.

"Are you alright?" He asked, brushing the hair out of my face. I nodded my head and started to climb off of him. He was trying to help me but I ended up getting my foot caught and I fell sideways, hitting my head on the dashboard.

"Owe," I winced, rubbing my head.

"Baby," Edward shrieked. "Are you okay?" He reached over and started rubbing my head too.

"Yeah, I'm fine. My foot got caught," I explained.

"Let me look," I leaned my head over towards him and he inspected my head. "Well there's no blood, so that's good. But you do have quite the bump. I should probably get you home so my dad can look at it."

"Edward, I'm fine, really. It's just a bump," I argued.

"Will you please just let my dad look at it? I don't want to find out later that it's something serious."

"If you think I should, then I will. But what exactly are you planning to tell him about how it happened?" We both began laughing.

"Good point," he said. "I'm sure we can think of something. I really want him to look at it." He kissed the tip of my nose and I sighed giving in to his plea.

He drove home and every time I reached up to rub my head, I could see him cringe. "I'm so sorry, Bella. I shouldn't have let you climb across the car like that. I should have known it would be uncomfortable for you."

"Edward, stop. It's not a big deal. It's just a bump. It's not your fault." I leaned over and laid my head on his shoulder as he drove the rest of the way home.

Everyone was worried about me when we walked in. Edward practically carried me in and laid me on the couch. Carlisle came in and checked out the bump and checked my vitals. He said that it didn't look that serious and I should probably just put an ice pack on it and rest. He said I shouldn't go to sleep for a couple hours just to be sure, so Edward suggested we watch a movie in my room. Carlisle thought that was an excellent idea. No one ever did ask how I hit my head, which I was thankful for, since I probably would have turned bright red if they had.

Edward rushed to the kitchen to get an ice pack and ushered me up to my room. He laid me down on the pillow and pulled the covers up around me. "Can I put some pajamas on?" I asked, with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh, right." He crossed the room to the dresser and pulled some pajamas out of my drawer. "I can help you get dressed if you need me to," he suggested, handing me the clothes. I rolled my eyes at him.

"Give me a break, Edward, I think I can dress myself," I said in irritation.

"I'm just worried about you, baby," he said, sitting down on the bed next to me. "I should have been more careful, I knew there wasn't enough room."

"Edward, I promise you, I'm fine. You don't have to be so worried all the time."

"I also thought it might be kind of fun to help you get dressed," he said, with a grin on his face.

I rolled my eyes and shook my head at him. He laughed, leaning in to kiss me quickly on the lips.

"I'm going to go down and get you something to eat. When I get back we can watch the movie." I nodded my head. He left the room closing the door behind him. I dressed in my pajamas and laid my head down on the pillow. Within a few minutes I could feel my eyes getting heavy.

After what seemed like just a few short moments, I felt Edward brush his lips across my cheek. "Are you hungry," he whispered. I took a deep breath and began to sit up. I was actually starving. I leaned against the headboard as Edward handed me a sandwich then went across the room to start the movie. He came back to the bed and sat next to me. I ate the sandwich and watched the movie but I could feel Edward watching me attentively. It made me uncomfortable.

"Edward," I shouted. "I'm fine."

"I know," he agreed.

"Then why are you staring at me like I'm going to need to be rushed to the hospital or something?" I asked.

"Am I?" He questioned. "I'm sorry, I just feel guilty."

I leaned over and pulled him to me, kissing his lips. "It was well worth it," I whispered. He smiled that crooked smile, leaning in to kiss me again.

We watched the rest of the movie wrapped in each other's arms. Of course Edward chose the longest movie possible to watch. I could feel him adjust every few minutes to make sure I was still awake. I tried to ignore it since I knew it was just him. He was always going to worry about my well being before anything else. He got that trait from him mom for sure.

"You should get some sleep," he recommended, when the movie was finally over. "I think it would be okay now." I nodded my head and began laying back. He pulled himself down closer to me and wrapped me up in his arms.

"Alice called while I was downstairs," he informed, as he played with a strand of my hair.

"She did? What did she want?" I asked, lazily.

"She just wanted to talk to you, but I told her what happened and that you would call her back tomorrow."

"Okay," I said.

"I think she wanted to go shopping or something," he continued.

"She always wants to go shopping," I laughed.

"I think there was something important she wanted to go shopping for," he added.

"Oh," I said, oblivious to what it was. I heard him sigh heavily, almost like he wanted to say something but didn't know how.

I waited a few minutes wondering if he was going to say anything more, but he didn't.

"Thank you for today," I said, laying my head on his chest.

"What part," he chuckled.

"All of it. Today was amazing. I like being able to drive. I like being with you." He pulled me closer to him and began rubbing my arm.

"Well I'm glad you like being with me, because I absolutely enjoy, every second I get to spend with you," he admitted. I smiled to myself and pulled myself even closer to him so I could go to sleep. I wanted him to stay all night and I knew if I was wrapped around him enough, if he moved I would know so I could wake up and pull him back.

I was just about to fall asleep when I heard him whisper my name. "Bella…" I hummed in response. "Will you go to prom with me?"

* * *

**Okay so James is caught. Life is perfect for everyone, right? Don't be so sure, there is still so much more that they have to get through. I have 7 chapters left plus epi planned, but I might end up combining some of those chapters, it depends on what I come up with and how long they end up being. I don't want to drag anything out too long. Hopefully I'll have another chapter up in a few days but life with 4 busy little boys doesn't leave me alot of time to write.**


	22. Chapter 21

**Sorry screwed up and posted a repeat. Thanks Suganary for letting me know. Should be all fixed now.**

**A/N:** Sorry this chapter took so long but I had sick kiddos this week and my laptop blew up, so I've had limited computer access. Good thing is that I'll be getting a new laptop hopefully this weekend and my kids are on antibiotics so they are on the mend. This chapter is very long and nothing too exciting happens but I felt it necessary. This chapter is also dedicated to my good friend Pinky who kept pushing some of these ideas on me so I finally made it happen. Thank you Pinky for all the great advice and support LY. And of course thank you to bzeemomof4 and redlulu for all your help in all my stories I write. You both are such wonderful friends and I'm glad to have both of you LY.

One more thing I pulled an all-nighter at the last minute and entered the **To Kill A Cullen** one shot contest so if anyone wants to read my story for that it's on my profile. Bring tissues with you because it's a tear jerker.

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters.

**Thank you for all the reviews and adding my story to faves and alerts. All the love makes me very happy :-)**

* * *

**Every Little Thing You Do: Westlife**

Hello, let me know if you hear me  
Hello, if you want to be near  
Let me know  
And I'll never let you go

Hey love  
When you ask what I feel, I say love  
When you ask how I know  
I say trust

And if that's not enough

_[Chorus]_  
It's every little thing you do  
That makes me fall in love with you  
There isn't a way that I can show you  
Ever since I've come to know you  
It's every little thing you say  
That makes me wanna feel this way  
There's not a thing that I can point to  
'Cause it's every little thing you do

Don't ask why  
Let's just feel what we feel  
'Cause sometimes  
It's the secret that keeps it alive  
But if you need a reason why

_[Chorus]_

Is it your smile or your  
laugh or your heart?  
Does it really matter why I love you?  
Anywhere there's a crowd, you stand out  
Can't you see why they can't ignore you  
If you wanna know  
Why I can't let go  
Let me explain to you  
That every little dream comes true  
With every little thing you do

_[Chorus X2]_

It's everything, everything you do  
That makes me fall in love with you  
It's everything, everything you say  
That makes me feel this way

**BPOV**

"What?" I shrieked, sitting up to look at him. He looked nervous and almost scared.

"Go to prom with me," he repeated.

"Edward, when you asked me to homecoming months ago I wasn't kidding when I said I couldn't dance."

"And I wasn't kidding when I said I could help you with that," he countered.

"Edward…" I whined.

"Look," he interrupted. "Before you start naming off another list of reasons why you can't or won't go. Just hear me out. This is our last big event before graduation and it's an important milestone in most people's eyes. I want to go to at least one school function with the girl I love before I graduate. You've already missed out on so much of normal high school events. I don't want you missing this too."

"Why is this so important to you?" I wondered.

"It's not. If you really don't want to go then we won't go. But Alice jumped down my throat when she found out I hadn't asked you yet. I guess with everything else going on it wasn't my top priority. But I do want to go with you."

I grimaced and fell back on the pillow. He watched me and slowly, laid his head back on the pillow next to me.

"Why don't you want to go?" He asked.

"I told you. I don't know how to dance. Plus, I'll feel silly in some frilly, sparkly prom dress. It's not me. And knowing Alice , she'll put me in heels and then I'll probably fall and break a leg or something."

"Okay, we'll do this again," he smirked. "I can help you with the dancing part. If you want to wear what you wore today to prom or even jeans and a t-shirt, I don't care. You look beautiful in everything anyway. You don't need a frilly, sparkly dress to do that. And you won't fall. I'll hold you up the entire time. I won't leave your side for one second."

I sighed. "Does Alice plan on dressing me?" He smiled.

"Only if you want her to," he replied.

"Let me think about it," I said.

"Think about it," he repeated. "In other words, you'll avoid until it's too late and we can't go." He knew me too well. That was probably what I would end up doing. Prom wasn't all that important to me. I didn't need a special occasion to spend time with Edward. This right here, us just lying in each other's arms while we watched a movie or talked, was more intimate and special to me. Prom in my eyes was just an event created so all the popular girls can get all glammed up and show off one last time before they passed the reins off to the next bitches. Did I just say that? I never swear. Not even internally. I've wanted to but was always too afraid to. But wow the feeling that gave me when I did.

"I'll tell you what," I offered. "Let me talk to Alice and think about it for one week and then I'll give you an answer."

"One week?" he questioned, raising an eyebrow.

I rolled my eyes. "I promise, one week."

"Okay," he accepted. "But you will say yes, right?" He stared at me nervously. I laughed.

"What happened to the ever confident Edward that was so sure I was going to say yes back at homecoming?" I asked.

"Well, maybe because I was completely wrong then, this seems like a repeat of that," he admitted.

I leaned in and kissed him softly on the lips. "I guess you'll have to figure out how to convince me." He smiled grabbing the back of my head, pulling me in for a longer kiss.

We kissed for so long, our hands exploring each other. I finally had to pull away to stop us before it went any farther. He groaned when I stopped but he didn't push it any further, knowing we had to stop. I curled up into his side and tangled my legs around his as he pulled me as close to him as I could possibly get. He brushed soft sweet kisses across my hair before I heard his breathing steady into a soft rhythmic hum. I listened to it for a while remembering how much I loved hearing that and wishing I could hear it when I would cry myself to sleep in Florida . I knew if I could just hear that sound I would be able to relax and go to sleep.

I was surprised his parent's hadn't come up to break us apart yet. Usually by now they would have but I didn't complain. I would have begged them to let him stay anyway. And if they would have said no, one of us probably would have snuck off in the middle of the night.

Eventually sleep came over me and I slept very comfortably wrapped around him.

The next morning, I was surprised that Edward was still here. I was sure he would have been told to leave at some point in the night, but he wasn't. I pulled the covers up over us and laid my head on Edward's warm chest. I drew circles around the patch of hair that adorned his chest. He draped his arm around my shoulders squeezing lightly and humming. I smiled.

How did I get so lucky? I thought to myself. How did this perfect man change my entire existence so completely? Who was watching over me that they would send him to love me? It almost didn't seem right and on more than one occasion, I wondered if I was going to wake up and all of this would be a dream. But I never did. He was always there. I never quite understood why he loved me. Why he chose me. I wondered if I would ever truly know. But I was glad he did. I don't think I would be alive if he didn't.

"Are you hungry?" He mumbled softly, still half asleep.

"No," I replied.

"Do you want to get up?" he asked, coming a little more coherent. I shook my head. "Then what do you want to do today?"

"Nothing," I answered. I could tell he was smiling without even looking.

"Good," he whispered.

We lay in bed for a good portion of the morning until Seth started pounding on the door, informing us breakfast was ready. We both reluctantly pulled ourselves out of bed and got dressed.

Once we went downstairs and were engulfed in the smells of waffles my stomach started growling loudly. Edward heard it and stifled a laugh. My face turned bright red. I was sure everyone probably heard it too.

"Are you feeling better, Bella?" Carlisle asked.

"Much better," I said, with a smile. He reached up to feel my head where the bump was. I instinctively jerked away. He pulled his hands back in surrender.

"Sorry," I apologized.

"It's alright. I understand. May I check the bump out though? I'd like to make sure the swelling has gone down." I nodded my head and he slowly reached up to feel the area where the bump was. I felt Edward come up behind me and place his hands on my shoulders. I relaxed almost immediately.

"Well, it looks like the swelling has gone down and as long as you don't feel dizzy or disoriented, then I'd say you're going to be just fine," Carlisle said, smiling down at me. I smiled back and nodded my head.

We sat at the table and as soon as Rosalie and Emmett showed up we began eating.

"So, what does everyone have planned for the day?" Esme asked.

"Rose and I are going to be working on Bella's truck," Emmett announced. He glanced over at me and winked. I blushed.

"I think Bella and I are going to be out most of the day," Edward said. I glanced over at him, with questioning eyes.

"We are?" He just shook his head and smiled crookedly.

"Well, Carlisle is taking Seth to a birthday party for a friend from school and I'm taking Leah shopping with one of her friends. So, we'll be gone most of the day," she informed us. "If anyone needs anything we'll be on our cell phones." We all acknowledged her and once everyone was done eating we started dispersing in different directions. Edward led me back upstairs.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"I told you, Alice wants to go shopping."

"You're planning to go shopping with us?" I asked.

"No," he laughed. "Jasper and I are going to hang out with some of the guys from school and play football."

"Is Alice planning to make me buy a prom dress?" I asked, with a disgusted look on my face.

"She's probably going to make you look at dresses and try some on, but she can't make you buy anything. Although, she might end up buying something for you if you don't buy it for yourself," he stated. I fell back on the bed and groaned. He came over and climbed over top of me. I looked up into his eyes.

"It won't be that bad you know," he said. I knew what he was talking about. He was trying to convince me about prom. I sighed. "I'll be right there with you."

"Can we not discuss this right now?" I asked. He hopped up on his feet and went over to his closet, gathering up his football stuff. I began to realize I had never really seen him play football before and I wanted to.

"Can I just come with you and watch you play?" I asked. "I'd rather be with you then go shopping with Alice."

"Nope," he said matter-of-factly. "Alice will be here any minute and you know she won't let you ditch her to watch me play."

"How long are you going to be gone today?" I wondered.

"I don't know how long we'll play. I guess until we all get too tired. But afterwards I'll be over at Alice's house with Jasper until you both get back," he explained.

"Jasper and you are going to be at Alice's house without her there?" I questioned.

"You know Alice's parents are gone all the time. Jasper practically lives there with her since his mom is at work all the time and isn't the greatest mom to have anyway. I think that's why they fit so well because they both don't have parents who are necessarily there for them. So, they found comfort in each other."

"What did you find in me?" I asked. He turned to look at me with questioning eyes.

"What do you mean?" he wondered.

"Alice and Jasper have a lack of parental love in common, so they found that in each other. What do we have in common? What is it that you love about me?"

"You're wondering why it is that I love you?" He asked. I nodded my head. "Well, what do you love about me?"

"Are you kidding," I questioned, with a raised eyebrow. "Edward, any girl would die to be in my position right now. Even Jessica still wants you after everything that's happened. You don't see yourself the way girls do. You're handsome, and strong, and perfect for all intents and purposes. You are the ideal being of every girl's fantasy." He rolled his eyes and held out his hand motioning for me to stop.

"Is that all that you love about me? It's only because of my looks?" He scowled. "Or is it because you have what every other girl can't have?"

"No, I don't love you for your looks, Edward. There is so much more about you that I don't think anyone ever gets to see. You saved me, Seth, and Leah from a life that no one should ever have to live. You took the time to earn my trust even though I tried to push you away. You could have just walked away like so many others had, but you didn't. You do so many sweet little things to make me happy. You're caring and loving. You're protective of the people you care about. You always think about what everyone else needs before what you need. You're so much different than I thought you were." He raised an eyebrow at me from the closet door.

"Who exactly are you describing?" He questioned. "I didn't think about anyone else when I took off to Florida. I was only thinking about myself and what I wanted."

"But look how it turned out. It might not have been the smartest thing to do at the time, but it turned out to be the best thing for everyone," I explained.

"There you go again," he laughed. "You're always trying to turn everything that's screwed up into a positive."

"Is that a bad thing?" He crossed the floor and leaned down kissing me briefly.

"Not at all," he said. "It's just one of the many things I love about you."

"Well, what else do you love about me?" I asked with a smile. He smiled.

"You can't ask me that. There are too many things to name off," he said. I smiled at him before he leaned in kissing me again.

There was a knock on the door, but knocking was pointless because Alice swung the door open before either of us could say a word. We both turned in her direction, breaking our kiss.

"Are you ready to go prom shopping, Bella?" She asked excitedly, ignoring the fact that she just interrupted an intimate moment. I nodded my head hesitantly at her and stood from the bed. Edward went back to the closet to get the rest of his stuff.

"This is going to be so much fun," Alice announced, enthusiastically. I grabbed my coat and started following Alice out.

"Hey," Edward called after us. We both stopped and turned to face him. He smirked and started gesturing with his finger for me to come back over. I smiled and started moving towards him. He grabbed my hand and pulled me into the closet. "We'll be right out, Alice. If you want to wait downstairs I'd completely understand." She rolled her eyes and huffed. I think I heard her say something under her breath as she walked out, shutting the door behind her.

Edward shut the closet door. He turned to me and grabbed my face with his hands tilting it slightly before claiming my lips with his own. My hands rested on his hips. When our kiss broke he continued to travel down my neck and shoulders with soft, gentle kisses. I moaned and closed my eyes. "Don't let Alice force you to do anything you don't want to do," he said, breathlessly. "I know she means well, but I don't want you to do something you don't want to do just to make someone else happy. You can tell her no if you want. Just like you can tell me no about anything that you truly don't want to do. I'd never love you any less for telling me no. And neither would Alice." I nodded my head, understanding exactly what he was saying. He leaned in giving me one more, quick chaste kiss. "Will you do me a favor though?"

"Whatever you want," I replied. He smiled that crooked smile. "Next Saturday night, I want to take you out. It's probably going to be a little on the fancy side, so buy a dress today."

"A dress…?" I questioned. "You have something planned don't you? Considering that will be one week." He smiled mischievously.

"You told me I had to convince you," he explained. I huffed and shook my head. "I'm not asking you to buy a prom dress, just a simple nice outfit that you can wear to dinner with me."

"Alright," I agreed. I leaned up on my tippy toes and kissed him once more before opening the closet door and stepping out. "Be careful today. I don't want you to get hurt playing football." He laughed.

"I'll be fine. Now go before Alice comes back up here. And have fun." I left the room and headed down stairs in a happy mood. Alice was standing by the front door with her arms across her chest.

"Are you done now?" She asked with a raised eyebrow.

"He only wanted to tell me to buy a dress," I explained.

"Well, of course you're buying a dress. You do need a prom dress you know." She asserted, as we began walking out to her car. I climbed into the passenger seat and she started up her car.

"I'm not buying a prom dress Alice," I announced, as she started backing out of the driveway.

She slammed on the brakes making me put my hand on the dashboard to brace myself. I stared at her with wide eyes wondering what she was doing. But she was staring at me with the same wide eyed expression. "What do you mean you aren't buying a prom dress? Did he not ask you yet? I'm going to have to beat him if he didn't," she said, angrily.

"No, Alice it's nothing like that. He did ask me," I explained. "I just didn't say yes."

"What!?" she shouted. "Bella, are you crazy? If your boyfriend asks you to prom you should say yes."

"I probably will, I just haven't yet," I explained further.

"I'm so confused." She scrunched up her face.

"Just drive and I'll tell you," I said. She stared at me for a few seconds before beginning to drive out again. Once we were on the road I started explaining everything that happened and our agreement on the one week.

"Bella, this is silly. Just tell the boy yes. I think you owe him that much," she said, which made me feel very guilty all of a sudden. He did deserve to have me give him this one little thing after everything he's done for me.

"But what if I embarrass him?" I asked. It was probably my worst fear about this entire thing. All eyes were going to be on him. He was guaranteed to be prom king, which would put us right in front of everyone. It was one thing walking down the halls at school with him and having people stare, but being at prom in a dress, probably in heals, with my hair all done up and make-up on was a completely different thing. I would probably step on his toes or bump into someone or look utterly ridiculous next to him. He would be humiliated.

"He won't be embarrassed of you. Why would you even think that?" Alice asked, glancing over at me with questioning eyes.

"I don't know how to dance or how to behave at a dance. He'll think I'm stupid."

"Oh, Bella you are being ridiculous. How do you think you're supposed to behave at a dance?" She questioned. I shrugged my shoulders. "A school dance is nothing hard to figure out. You just go with a boy, preferably one you enjoy spending time with, you dance, you talk, and you visit with friends. It's not that hard. You don't have to act a certain way. And Edward would never be embarrassed of you. He loves you."

"I told him I'd give him an answer in a week, so next Saturday he's planning some special date for us. I'm not sure where we're going but he said I needed to buy a dress today," I explained.

"Then we're going to buy you one heck of a dress. One that will knock him off his feet," she stressed. I laughed. After I started to think about it, I didn't understand why I wasn't saying yes to him. I told myself I was going to do more to show him how much I loved him. I was planning on being more for him and on the first opportunity I had, I turned him down. The guilt I felt was almost unbearable and I wanted to call him immediately to apologize.

"We're going to get you glammed up for this date you have this weekend and then once you say yes, I'm taking you prom dress shopping. We might look at dresses for prom today as well if you're willing. Maybe if you find one you like you can put it on hold or just go ahead and buy it today." Alice went on and on the entire way to Port Angeles about what we were going to be doing.

We went to a spa first. Alice thought it would be good to get my hair cut so I gave in and got just a little bit trimmed off the ends. She didn't think it was even worth it for the small amount I had cut off but it was all I was willing to part with. I like my hair long. Next, we both got manicures and pedicures.

Alice talked to the people who were helping us like she knew them very well and most likely she did. I was in awe of all her beauty knowledge. She knew it all when it came to making someone look beautiful. She was definitely going to have to help me on Saturday to get ready for my date with Edward and for the prom.

After the spa, we walked around the mall and went into almost every store. Alice had me try on at least a dozen dresses in each store but none of them were right to her. Personally, I think they all looked great, but I wanted her opinion on which one would be the best.

"I think you should wear a short dress instead of a long one. Something simple and not too flashy would be best for you. We need to highlight your natural beauty and not overshadow it with frills and glitz," Alice said, while she scanned the racks at yet another store. She handed me a pile of dresses and sent me to the dressing room. I was so exhausted already. I really just wanted to go home at this point. I didn't think Alice was ever going to find the right dress for me. But thankfully after the third dress I tried on in this store, I walked out of the dressing room so she could see and the minute I stepped out a huge smile spread across her lips. She bounced out of her chair and started clapping her hands and jumping up and down.

"I take it you like this one?" I asked.

"This dress is perfect for you Bella. I think you could probably wear this dress to prom even," she stated.

"Was that the whole plan? To find me a dress I can wear on Saturday as well as prom?" I asked.

She gave me a dirty look. "You will not be wearing the same dress you wear Saturday to prom," she asserted. "We can go shopping again next Sunday and get you a prom dress." Great, another tiresome shopping trip, I thought to myself.

"Why don't I try on the other dresses you picked out also?" I suggested. Maybe I'll find something for prom too." I went back into the store and finished trying on all the dresses. Alice saw two other dresses she liked on me. Once I was dressed in my own clothes, she hung the dresses up along the dressing room door staring between the three of them for at least ten minutes. I had no idea what she was doing, so I stood behind her and waited.

"Definitely this one for your date on Saturday," she said, handing me the first dress that she liked. It was a simple white dress with a black band across the waist. It flared out slightly and if I twirled around, it would flutter. I remember being a little girl and twirling my dresses like that.

Finally, she chose between the other two dresses and handed me a dark blue dress that was similar to the first, but had some differences. "This is the one you should wear to prom," she said. Neither of them was over the top, which I was thankful for. "You should get them both today. But if you aren't ready to buy a prom dress yet then I'm sure we could put it on hold."

"I think I'll go ahead and buy them both," I decided. "I think it would be easier to go ahead and get it now, so we don't have to come back."

"So, does this mean you plan to go to prom?" She asked, smiling.

"I never said I wouldn't go. I just said I needed to think about it. But I like this dress and even if we end up not going to prom, I'm sure I'll have another occasion to wear it." Her smile grew.

"You'll say yes to him. I know you will," she said. I rolled my eyes and smiled back.

After paying for the dresses and going to a few other stores for accessories and shoes we started heading out to the car.

"I bought earrings," Alice said, once back in the car. I didn't understand why she was telling me that.

"Okay," I said simply, hoping she would elaborate a little more.

"I bought them for you. But you don't have your ears pierced."

"Oh, I did as a child, but I think they closed up after so long of not wearing earrings," I explained.

"How would you feel about getting them pierced again?" She asked. My throat felt dry the second she said it. James would never allow me to get my ears pierced. That's why they closed up in the first place since he didn't like any of us to wear jewelry. Just as I was about to tell Alice I couldn't because James wouldn't approve, I remembered he wasn't here anymore. I didn't have to do things just to make him happy. I didn't have to do anything to make anyone happy except for myself. It was a euphoric feeling that came over me when I realized I could do what I wanted. I could make that decision. And Edward was right; Alice wasn't going to be upset if I told her no.

"You know what Alice?" I said, trying to hold back my excitement. "I think I do want to get my ears pierced."

"Great, I know the perfect place." We drove a few blocks away from the mall and pulled into a little shop that did piercings and tattoo's. When we walked in Alice instantly ran over to the counter giving the guy behind it a hug.

"Bella, this is Jenks," she introduced. He was slightly scary looking. He had quite a few tattoos and many piercings all over his face and ears. It was intimidating.

"It's nice to meet you," I said, cautiously, holding out my hand to him. He shook it and greeted me.

"He's an old friend of mine and he'll be piercing you today," Alice explained.

"Oh, so you'll be the victim for the day," he said. I nodded my head, but I was suddenly having second thoughts about this whole thing.

"Come on, you need to pick out what studs you want put in," Alice said, grabbing my hand and pulling me towards the glass display counter. "You need to pick out something that will go good with both dresses since you'll have to leave them in for a while." In other words, I needed to let her pick them out. She scanned the case and asked Jenks to get a few different items out so she could get a better look. My eyes wandered the shop, and landed on a wall covered with many different pictures that I assumed were for tattoos. In one corner was a whole sheet of Japanese symbols, similar to the ones Edward gave me. I walked across the room to get a better look trying to find the ones Edward had given me.

"Bella, get over here. I need to know if you like these ones," Alice shouted across the room. I turned around and walked back over to Alice looking down at the ones she was pointing to. "I think you should just get the clear stones. They'll go with anything and give you a little sparkle." I nodded my head agreeing with her. "What size do you want?" I looked down once again and there was a whole strip of clear stone earrings that were different sizes. I pointed to the smallest ones but Alice insisted I get something a little bigger. So, we chose something in the middle. Jenks told us to have a seat and he would go get set up.

"Does Jenks do tattoo's too?" I asked as we sat down on a red leather couch in a corner.

She nodded her head. "He can do anything. He's very talented."

After a few minutes, Jenks came out and called me back. Alice came with me into the small room and held my hand while Jenks stuck a needle through each ear and attached the studs. It stung at first and I could tell my ears were getting red from the blood rushing to them.

"Alright, you're all set," Jenks said. We all stood up and started heading out of the room. I went to pull out my wallet to pay, but Alice stopped me.

"This is my treat," she offered. "To thank you for letting me torture you with all this shopping and beauty stuff. I know it's not your thing, so I'm glad you put up with me. Most of my friends don't and I'm so glad you can finally come with me now." She gave me a hug and turned back to Jenks handing him a credit card.

We headed back towards home and pulled into her driveway. I noticed Edward's car in the driveway as well and I suddenly felt my heart flutter knowing I would see him in a few minutes. We gathered all the bags from the trunk and headed towards the door. When we walked in there were five guys sitting around the TV playing a football video game and cheering each other on.

"I thought when you said you were playing football today you were actually playing football outside. Not playing a football video game," Alice said, standing in the entryway of the living room with her hands on her hips.

"We did babe," Jasper said, shyly. But when we were done, a few of us came back here to play some video games."

"My house isn't here for you to do anything you want, you know?" Alice said, assertively.

"I'm sorry, I didn't think you would mind if it was just a few of us," he said, getting up and walking towards her. "Do you forgive me?" He wrapped his arms around her and tried to kiss her but she arched her back trying to avoid him. He was persistent though and nuzzled her neck making her lose her ground and she started giggling. Eventually her lips met his and they had a passionate kiss right in front of everyone.

"Bella," I heard Edward call. My head jerked in his direction and he tilted his head gesturing for me to come over to him. I walked around Jasper and Alice who were still in an embrace at the entrance and walked over to Edward. When I got close enough to him he grabbed my hand pulling me down on his lap. "Did you have a good day?" I nodded my head and smiled. "Good." He leaned in giving me a long kiss on the lips.

"Well, I guess that's our sign that it's time for us to leave," one of the guys who was in the room with us said. My face turned red as Edward pulled me closer to his chest. He wasn't this intimate in front of his friends usually. He would kiss me on the cheek or on the forehead and hold my hand but never like that. I tasted a funny taste on his tongue too."

"Bye guys," Edward said to them as they got up to leave. They said their goodbyes and left out the front door. Alice dragged Jasper upstairs to put away her bags. She planned to hold on to my stuff as well and bring it over on Saturday to help me get ready. She didn't want Edward to see either dress, saying it needed to be a surprise.

"Were you drinking?" I asked, realizing that's what I tasted on his mouth.

"I only had a little," he admitted. "It was a while ago, too." I stared at him for a second with questioning eyes. "Do you not want me to drink alcohol or something? If you don't, I won't."

"No, I don't care. I'm just wondering why you were drinking today."

"Do I need a reason? I was just hanging out with friends and we decided to have a drink. There wasn't anything important about it," he explained. I nodded my head. "Bella, I don't drink all the time if that's what you're worried about."

"That's not what I'm worried about," I said.

"Then what is it? I know something is bothering you."

"It's just that the only times I know of where you were drinking was when you were upset about something. I think all of those times were about me, too. So I'm wondering if maybe you're upset about something I did," I said, concerned. He wrapped his arms around me tightly and kissed my neck.

"Baby, I'm not upset about anything. I was only having a good time with my friends. Don't worry," he assured. I sighed, feeling relieved. "Besides, if I wanted to drink because I was upset, I would have drunk quite a bit more than one little drink." I smiled at him leaning in to kiss his lips.

"Are you ready to go home?" He asked.

"Are you okay to drive?" I questioned.

"I'll be fine," he said.

"Why don't we just stay here for a little longer?" I suggested. "We can order a pizza and hang out with Jasper and Alice for a while. If I can't see you play football at least I can watch you play football on the video game."

"I have a better idea," he said suddenly, helping me off the couch and pulling me with him to the back door.

"Where are we going?" I questioned.

"Alice and Jasper probably won't be down for a while. Have you ever played football?" He asked. I shook my head. "You keep talking about wanting to see me play, so instead you and I are going to play."

"I can't play football," I said.

"Sure you can. And in a way we aren't technically playing football. We're just going to toss the ball back and forth."

I couldn't believe he wanted me to play football with him. I had played a little in P.E. class but I was never that good and most of the time I didn't know what I was doing.

He grabbed the ball off the porch as we stepped in the backyard. He grabbed my hand placing the ball in my hand. He then showed me how to hold it correctly and how to throw it. I knew that much but having him stand behind me closely and running his fingers up my arm as he explained how to hold it and how to extend my arm was nice, so I didn't tell him I knew how.

Eventually we started tossing the ball back and forth then went to spiking the ball. It was fun watching him. He was very intense when he played. Even with me, he was focused on throwing just right and staying in form. He was fascinating to watch.

After a while, Alice and Jasper came out, so Alice and I stood to the side while Jasper took over and they played a little.

Once they were done we went inside and ordered pizza for dinner. Then we watched a movie and watched Jasper and Edward play the football video game for a while.

It was past midnight by the time we left. Edward had called his parent's shortly after we had eaten, letting them know where we were and that we wouldn't be home until late.

The drive home was quiet. I was exhausted and I think I fell asleep a couple times watching the movie.

When we got home, all the lights were off indicating everyone was probably asleep, so we quietly scaled the stairs to our room to go to bed. I collapsed on the bed as soon as we stepped inside and shut the door. Edward began pulling my shoes off and removing my jeans and blouse replacing them with just a simple T-shirt of his. He then pulled me up to the pillow and covered me up. A few minutes later he had climbed in behind me on the bed wrapping his free arm around my torso tightly. I smiled at the feeling having him next to me gave me. It was like I didn't feel whole until we were connected in some way.

He began twirling a strand of my hair around his finger, which was something he was beginning to do a lot lately. I think it gave him some sort of comfort just like having his arms wrapped around me gave me comfort.

"Did you cut your hair?" He asked, quietly. I nodded my head.

"Alice talked me into it. But I only got a trim. She wanted me to get more cut, but I said no." I could feel him smiling when I told him that I had done what I wanted instead of what she wanted.

"And getting your ears pierced, was that your idea or hers?" He questioned.

"It was Alice's idea, but I wanted to do it."

"I like it. The hair and the ears," he said, leaning in to kiss my ear gently. "So, what else did she talk you into?"

"If you're wondering if she was able to talk me into prom you'll just have to wait until Saturday to find out," I said, playfully. I heard him chuckle lightly.

"I can wait."

"There is something I want to ask you though," I said.

"What's that?" he wondered, sounding drowsy.

"Since you are planning a special date for us on Saturday night, can I convince you into going on a date with me on Friday night? There's something I want to do and I want you to come with me. It'll be my treat. I'm sure it won't be nearly as wonderful as what you are planning but…"

"Bella," he interrupted. "Whatever it is you want to do, we can do. You don't have to ask. Now get some sleep." He curled up closer to me and we both fell asleep quickly.

**EPOV**

I knew the minute I asked her to prom, she was going to try and get out of it. She'd never directly tell me no, but she would try to avoid it and come up with excuse after excuse before I either gave up or until it was too late.

It wasn't like prom was that big of a deal for me, but I knew we would regret not going if we didn't. Plus, I wanted her to have at least one normal high school experience before we graduated.

The one week thing was interesting. At least I knew she wasn't going to drag it out. And honestly if she said no, I'd be okay with that. I would just plan something else for that night.

But when she started questioning me about why I love her, I honestly didn't know what to tell her. I couldn't pin point one thing. There were so many things I love about her. It would take me a life time to name off everything. So I needed to show her.

Before she left for the day with Alice, I got an idea of taking her out on Saturday. It would be the one week deadline she gave herself to give me an answer. It would also give me the opportunity to prove to her that my love for her was irrevocable and unconditional. But most important, it would keep her distracted for the day. Emmett had informed me that James was being extradited back here this week and was scheduled to be back on Saturday. Even if he was in police custody, if she knew he was back in the same area as she was, I knew there was a good chance she would invert back to that scared little girl and everything that she had been building in herself would be gone. I didn't want her to lose that self-confidence she was beginning to build up.

Eventually, I knew she was going to have to testify against him and I think deep down she knew it too, but we never talked about it or discussed it. I felt like she needed to hold off on focusing on that part of this ordeal and just focus on herself. The more confidence and self-esteem she had the stronger she would be when she had to actually face him in a court room. So if I had to distract her from knowing James was back in the area, so as not to lose that part of her I would.

Once she left, I called up a place in Seattle I knew of that would offer me everything I needed to make reservations. The man I talked to was very gracious once I said money was no object. Thanks Grandpa Cullen for leaving me with a nice trust fund that kicked in when I turned eighteen to make that possible.

I reserved a private room that led out onto a back patio overlooking the water. They assured me that the gazebo off to the side would be private and lit up. I even requested they lay rose petals all over the gazebo floor. I knew how to pull off this romantic stuff pretty well. Dad was always doing sweet romantic things for mom, so I learned a thing or two from him. Plus, Emmett wasn't too bad in the romance department either. Although, I never understood why he wanted to be romantic with Rosalie, but whatever, if she was who he wanted, so be it.

I picked Jasper up at Alice's house and we went to the park to play football with a bunch of the guys from the team. I was disappointed that a few of the guys dragged along some of their girlfriends and even a few who weren't with anyone, namely Jessica. This was supposed to be a guy's day with no chicks or girlfriends. I even gave up spending the day with Bella to be here, but then they brought along theirs. Bella had never seen me play and I wanted to call her to tell her she could come if she wanted to, but I also wanted her to have a good time with Alice.

Jessica kept giving me dirty looks during the entire game. I just laughed at her. I wished Bella was here cheering me on just to piss her off.

We didn't play for very long since some of the girls were getting cold and were whining that they wanted to go home. That was why this was supposed to be a girl free day. I knew if my girl was here she would never complain about being cold. She would enjoy every second of being here watching me, whether it was a good thing or not.

Eventually a few of us went back to Alice's house to play some video game football instead and when Jasper offered us a drink none of us turned him down.

I was surprised that Bella seemed upset by it though. But once she explained why I understood why she was upset. I honestly wasn't drinking to get drunk, I was only relaxing, having a good time with friends.

Playing football with her was fun. She didn't know much about the sport but she tried. Once Jasper came out and we ran a few drills she seemed so excited to see me playing.

I noticed her ears pierced instantly, but I didn't say anything at first because I didn't want to embarrass her or have Alice try to justify it in any way. I wanted to wait until we were alone to talk to her about it. So later that night while we lay in bed, I realized her hair felt different so I questioned her about her hair being cut. I was overjoyed with pride when she told me she had stood her ground on not getting more cut off like Alice had wanted. She actually listened to me and didn't let Alice tell her what to do. When I asked her about the earrings she said it was Alice's idea, but she wanted it done too. I wasn't sure if she was being honest, but I figured at least she took a stand against the hair cutting. It was a start.

When she wanted to take me out on Friday night though, I was a little shocked. I never imagined she would want to take _me_ out. That was supposed to be my job. I had no idea what she was planning but it didn't matter. If she needed this to build more self-confidence then I'd do it gladly.

The rest of the week went by fast. I was surprised how much Bella had changed once James was caught. She was happy all the time. She was learning how to make decisions for herself and learning that she didn't always have to make everyone happy all the time.

She had heard from Kate on Thursday and Bella informed her she was going in on Friday to take her permit test. She had read that permit study guide three times, so there was no possible way she could fail, but she was nervous about it.

We didn't have school that Friday due to an in service day, so it turned out to be the perfect day for whatever it was she was planning.

That morning Bella was up early studying her book once more to prepare for the permit test. She was nervous and kept biting her bottom lip and biting her nails.

"Bella, relax. You'll do fine," I assured her. "The test isn't that hard."

"I know. I just don't want to disappoint anyone. Rose and Emmett have been working so hard to get my truck running and I'm worried that they'll get it going and then I won't be able to drive it."

"Baby, you can take it again if you fail it the first time. You'll be able to drive it eventually," I said. "And seriously Bella, I don't think you're going to fail. You've studied that book more than most people probably have."

"I'm going to take a shower and get ready," she said, leaning down, giving me a quick kiss before darting out of the room towards the bathroom.

I rolled over onto my stomach trying to get a few more minutes of sleep when I heard a light knock on the door. I rolled over just as my mom stepped in.

"Is Bella ready for her test?" She asked.

"She's more than ready. She's read that book so many times." I sat up on the bed and suddenly realized I had no shirt on. I saw my mom glance down at my chest. I'm sure she was wondering if I had pants on at least. I decided to get up and walk over to the dresser to pull out a t-shirt. I think she was happy to see that I at least had sweats on. I was happy she was at least not making a big deal of us sleeping together now, so I wasn't going to jeopardize that by having sex, while my parents were in the house.

She walked over to the bed and sat down, so I went back and sat down next to her. "I wanted to bring these up to you," she said, handing me two large envelopes. One was from University of Washington and the other was from Stanford. I opened the first one and read the first line out loud.

"Congratulations your application to attend the University of Washington in the fall has been accepted." A smile spread across my face. This was what I was waiting for. I wanted to go to a school that I could actually play football at. I opened the next envelope to discover much of the same thing. Either school would be great.

I looked over at my mom excitedly. She had a weak smile on her face. I was confused by it. "Mom, are you alright?" I questioned.

"Of course I am, Edward," she said. "I'm just trying to figure out what you'll be choosing."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"You've been accepted to four colleges so far. I think either one would be great." She looked me in the eyes and placed her hand on my hand. "Personally I want you to go to one of the Ivy League schools, but I know football is your passion and you want to continue playing, so if you choose one of the other schools I'm okay with that. I'm trying to let go and let you make your own decisions. I'm giving you the opportunity to make some mistakes or just choices of your own without getting involved. Emmett and I had a long talk about you the other day and he made me realize I was being a little overbearing and I needed to let go before it's too late. That was the mistake I made with him. He wasn't the one who screwed up like both of you think. I did, as well as your father. I'm not disappointed in any way with the choices Emmett made. He's a good man now and he has a career he enjoys and cares about very much. I think he may have finally found someone to settle down with too. I'm very proud of him."

She paused. I sat there trying to take in everything she was telling me.

"I'm proud of you too, Edward. Not just for being a good student or for being good at football, but for what you've done the last few months for Bella and her family. You've definitely shown us a lot of maturity and strength. This whole experience has shown me a side of you I've never seen before. It worried me at first, but I'm realizing you're just growing up and trying to be your own person. And I'm very proud of you for learning how to do that before you go off to college."

"Thanks mom. But everything that's changed _is_ because of Bella. She makes me feel alive. I feel like I can do anything when I'm with her," I said. "She makes me happier than I've ever been. I know that might sound strange, but it's true. When I'm with her everything in the world just fits. I feel whole. It's like before she came into my life, something was missing."

She sighed and squeezed my hand. "I know you love her Edward and I'm glad you do. She's a wonderful girl and I couldn't have chosen a better girl for you. But please just promise me you won't give up your future because of her. I know right now you think you can have it all and I'm sure you've probably talked to her about going to college with you and that's great if she's willing to. But don't forget about what she needs as well. She might think that all she needs is you and you probably think the same thing about her, but you both need a future as well."

"I know mom. We've already discussed this. Wherever I decide to go, she's coming with me and she'll go to a community college in the area and try to get into the same school as me the following year," I explained.

"I see. It seems you have it all worked out then." She let go of my hand and laced her fingers together, placing them in her lap. "And is that all you've talked about?"

"What do you mean?" I questioned.

"I overheard Rose telling Bella the other day that she and Emmett have been discussing marriage. Is that something you've thought about?"

"Not really," I confessed. "I do want to spend the rest of my life with her, but I'm not ready to get married yet. I want to finish school first and start my career in whatever I plan to do before I even begin to think that far ahead." She let out a heavy breath and I saw a smile threatening to spread across her face. But she was doing her best to not show it. "Do you not want me to marry her or something?"

"No, Edward, it's nothing like that. I just want to be sure you both are ready for such a big commitment. Going off to school together is one thing, but to be legally bonded to someone is a different matter. I just want you both to think real hard before you make any future plans," she said.

"We will, mom," I promised. She gave me a hug and just as she stood to leave the room, Bella walked in wearing just her robe. My mom turned towards her and I saw Bella's cheeks turn bright red. Her hair was still wet and her robe was loosely tied in front revealing most of her chest. She instantly grabbed the robe and pulled it around her tighter.

I gave her an apologetic look. I saw my mom glance back towards me before turning to leave the room.

"I've got to get to school. You both may have the day off, but I don't unfortunately. Carlisle should be home around one today to take care of Seth and Leah, so that should be plenty of time to get to your appointment." We had to entertain Seth and Leah today while everyone was gone. "Good luck today on your permit test Bella. I'm sure you'll do great," she said, as she walked out.

"Thank you," Bella replied. Her voice cracking as she spoke. My mom stepped out and shut the door behind her.

Bella's face instantly fell into her hands. I couldn't help but laugh. I walked over to her and let her fall into my arms to hide from her embarrassment. "I thought she would be gone by now. Or if anything be down stairs with Seth and Leah," she said, her voice full of humiliation.

"Baby, don't worry about it. She didn't say anything."

"It's embarrassing. The thoughts she must be having right now about me."

"Bella, look at me." I grabbed her face and pulled it up to look into her eyes. "Don't be embarrassed. I'm glad you feel open enough to not try to cover yourself up all the time when you're with me. It shows confidence. And I bet that's the only thing my mom is thinking about right now, too." She smiled up at me. I leaned down kissing her gently before letting her go. I plopped back down on the bed and watched as she pulled out clothes from the drawers. She turned around and began dressing without removing her robe. I couldn't handle it anymore, so I hopped up and started kissing the back of her neck. My hands ventured to the front of her, massaging her breasts through her robe. I heard her sigh heavily and she tilted her head forward giving me better access.

"Edward," she whispered. "We can't."

"It's okay, you heard my mom. She's leaving," I said, through kisses and licks.

"No, I mean we can't. I started my period," she explained.

"Oh," I said disappointed. "That's okay; I can still kiss you right?" I asked. She nodded her head. I twisted her around in my arms and claimed her lips with mine. Our kiss was deep and passionate.

"So, what did your mom want?" She asked pulling away slightly.

"She was just bringing up a couple more college acceptance letters," I said, nonchalantly.

"Edward, that's great. Which schools?" She asked.

"University of Washington and Stanford," I said with a smile.

"Are those schools you want to go to?"

"They're better football programs. I sort of blew it with the scouts so whatever school I go to I'll have to try out," I explained.

"That's wonderful news. I'm so happy for you," she said giving me a huge hug.

"I'm going to go take a shower and I'll join you downstairs in a minute," I said. She released me from the hug and I walked out into the hall to shower.

The rest of the day we hung out with Seth and Leah at the house waiting for my mom to get home. Bella was so nervous. She continued to study her book obsessively and bite her nails. On numerous occasions I had to pry her fingers out of her mouth to get her to stop. I didn't know what she was so nervous about. If she was this nervous just getting her permit, I didn't know if she'd be able to make it taking the actual driving test.

Right at one, my dad pulled into the driveway and Bella and I headed for the DMV. She filled out all the papers and waited to be called back to the test.

"You'll do fine. Just relax and make sure to read every question clearly," I offered, giving her a quick kiss before she darted off behind the doors to take the test.

I waited about forty-five minutes until she came out. She looked upset and my heart sank for her. She must not have past. She walked towards me slowly and I gave her a sympathetic smile.

I was completely ready to start consoling her when all of a sudden a huge smile spread across her face and she squealed flailing her arms in front of her with her permit in her hand. She jumped in my arms and I swung her around excitedly. "Congratulations," I said. I loved seeing her, this excited. I don't know if I've ever seen her, this happy.

We walked out to the parking lot and got into the car. I offered to let her drive but she refused. She said she was too excited to focus on driving, which was probably true.

"Where am I headed then?" I asked.

"Port Angeles," she said.

"Are you going to be a little more specific?" I questioned.

"I'll tell you where to go when we get closer." I pulled out onto the highway and headed towards Port Angeles. Once in town, she pointed out streets to take until we ended up pulling into a piercing and tattoo parlor. This must have been where Alice took her last weekend to get her ears pierced.

We got out and started walking towards the building hand in hand. "Are you getting another piercing?" I asked.

"No, I'm getting a tattoo," she said with a smile.

"A tattoo…?" I questioned. She nodded her head. We walked in and the man behind the counter greeted her like he knew her well.

"Hi Jenks," she greeted back. "I know I'm a little early. I hope that's okay."

"Not a problem Bella. Let me get set up and I'll be right with you," he said, walking towards the back.

"What made you decide to get a tattoo?" I asked.

"I was here with Alice last week and while she was picking out the earrings, I was looking at all the artwork up here." She pulled me over to a wall that was covered with different drawings. "This caught my eye." She pointed out the Japanese symbol for love. Just like the picture I had made her for her room. "So, during the week, I called and told Jenks what I wanted and scheduled an appointment."

"Where are you getting it?" I asked.

"On my hip," she said, pointing to a spot just under her pants. She smirked at me then bit her lip. "You could get one too."

"You want me to get a tattoo?" I asked, surprised. She nodded her head shyly. I thought about it for a second. Debating internally about whether or not I wanted to do this.

"You don't have to, but I just thought it would be kind of fun to have matching tattoos. Something that will always remind us of each other," she said.

"Are you sure you're not going to regret this someday?" I asked.

She shook her head. "I've told you before. I could never regret anything with you."

"Not necessarily regret anything with me, but just regret getting a tattoo," I clarified. She shook her head vigorously.

"I won't regret this. I need this," she stated.

I sighed. "Alright, if you want to get matching tattoos, then let's get a tattoo." Her whole face lit up when I said I'd do it. I think she had this whole thing planned and she knew I would never be able to tell her no. As much as I was trying to let her know it was okay for her to tell me no, it was utterly impossible for me not to give her whatever she desired. It wasn't that I was completely against getting a tattoo. I don't think I would have chosen the Japanese symbol for love as my first one, but it did make sense. It was something that was important to her and bonded us in our love.

We walked back into the room and she laid down on the table, I sat next to her holding her hand. She tightened up right at first but after only a few seconds she eased up slightly. It was just a small tattoo and nothing fancy about it, just plain black ink. It only took a short amount of time to finish. She examined it in the mirror with a pleased expression. Jenks, I think the man's name was, cleaned up his station and got it set up for my turn.

"So, where do you want it?" He asked, coming back with new supplies.

"I don't know," I said laughing. "Bella, where do you want me to put this?"

She walked back over to me, thinking about it. I took her hand in mine. "What about on your back?" She pointed out a spot just above my shoulder blade.

"Alright, I guess that works."

"If you're having second thoughts, now is the time to say something," Jenks said.

"I looked up at Bella's glowing face. I pulled her hand to my lips kissing the back of it. "No second thoughts. I want to do this," I assured him. I took my shirt off and got into position.

He gave me a sympathetic look before he began. Bella sat with me the entire time. Her face _was _glowing. She couldn't stop smiling.

Once Jenks was done he handed me a hand mirror so I could inspect it in the larger mirror. "It looks great. You do good work," I offered.

"Well, I hope you kids last. I don't normally do this type of thing because I get so many people coming back in wanting their boyfriends or girlfriends name covered up. But with you two, I sense something pure, something special. I hope I don't ever have to see either of you back in here. At least not to cover up those tattoos, if you're looking for another tattoo, then you know who to call," Jenks informed.

We walked back into the entryway and I pulled out my wallet to pay, but Bella stopped me. "This was my date, remember? I get to pay." I reluctantly put my wallet back in my pocket. She pulled out money and handed it to Jenks. We both thanked him one last time before exiting the shop.

"So, now we're going to go get some dinner," she explained. "I saw this place out by the water the other day and I want to try it out." I pulled out and drove down the streets she pointed to. We ended up in the parking lot of a small bistro. We walked in and she requested a table outside on the deck. This was her date, so I was letting her make all the decisions.

She ordered the salmon and I got the lobster. It had been a while since I've had some good seafood and I was looking forward to this meal. The place looked promising and could end up being a place we came a lot if the food was good.

We chatted about the tattoos and about school. I never once brought up prom even though I was dying to know what she was going to say. But I wanted to wait until after tomorrow to hear her answer.

The food was amazing and I definitely think I found our new place. She was laughing and talking so freely while we ate. This right here was probably my best day I ever had with her. I wasn't sure what I had planned for tomorrow would even compare to this.

"So, what do you think?" She asked.

"About…?" I questioned, hoping she would elaborate.

"About today," she answered. "Did you have fun? Did I do a good job?" She asked.

"Bella today was amazing. I had so much fun just seeing you so happy." I picked up a piece of the lobster with my fork and dipped it in the butter, bringing it to my mouth. Unfortunately, it fell off my fork just as I was about to take the bite and it cascaded down my shirt.

"Shit," I said, under my breath. I grabbed my napkin trying to clean myself up. I looked up and saw Bella's face scrunched up and her napkin covering her mouth. She was trying not to laugh, but once our eyes met she couldn't hold it in any longer. She burst into a fit of tearful laughing. I tossed my napkin at her playfully. She gave me a look of shock before tossing her napkin back at me. We both began laughing hysterically. I knew people that were around us were staring but I didn't care. I loved hearing her laugh.

"I'm sorry," she said, trying to stop her giggles.

"Don't be," I countered. "That right there is yet another thing I love about you. I don't think I've ever heard you laugh so freely with as much joy as you just did. And if it takes me spilling food on my shirt to hear that, then I'll gladly spill on myself every day for the rest of our lives." She smiled adoringly at me, reaching her hand across the table, linking our fingers together.

After we were done eating, we headed home and as we pulled in I noticed Emmett's car in the driveway. I got a knot in my stomach worried that he was here to let us know of James being extradited. I didn't want to ruin this day for her. This I'm sure was her best day as well. She was on such a high and I knew one mention of James would ruin that.

I was just about to suggest we turn around and get ice cream or something to distract her for a little longer in hopes Emmett would leave or at least give me a minute to sneak off and call him to make sure he knew not to say anything to her, at least not today. But unfortunately everyone came rushing out the front door to greet us. Including Rose, Emmett, Jasper, Alice, my parents, and of course Seth and Leah. Bella jumped out excitedly and started waving her permit for all of them to see. This was such a huge accomplishment and step closer to being free for her.

Everyone began giving her congratulating hugs and while I was able to sneak a glance at Emmett I gave him a questioning look. He knew exactly what I meant and shook his head letting me know that everything was fine. He wasn't going to bring it up today, if at all until it was completely necessary. In all of my worry I hadn't even noticed that Kate was back as well.

"I thought you weren't getting back until next week?" Bella questioned.

"I wanted to surprise you. I had to be here on the day my niece got her permit. Did Edward let you drive home?" She asked.

"He offered, but I was too nervous. I think I need a little more practice in the parking lot before I venture out onto the roads." She replied.

"Well anytime you want to practice let me know," Rose offered. "Edward doesn't always have to be the one to give driving lessons."

"Yes, please let us help in any way we can," my mom offered.

"Thanks," she said.

"Rose, are you going to show her?" Alice asked, excitedly.

"Show me what?" She asked.

"Come on," Rose said taking her hand. "I have a surprise for you." The entire group walked towards the garage and when we stepped in, Bella's truck sat there all cleaned up and ready. Bella glanced over to Rosalie, her mouth agape. "It's all ready." Rose smiled, proudly. This was turning out to be an even better day than I ever imagined possible. Bella hesitantly walked over to the driver's seat and climbed in. She slowly started up the engine as we all watched.

I saw her begin to cry once she heard the engine roar to life. I wanted to run to her but all four women beat me to her. I didn't like that, but what could I do? They all loved her as much as I did. After a few seconds of consoling her she stepped out with everyone's hands on her, guiding her out. She walked over to me and I put an arm around her protectively. She smiled weakly. I mouthed the words "Are you okay." She nodded her head and placed a hand on my chest reassuring me she was fine.

We all started walking back towards the house.

"So, I hear you and Bella have some hot date planned for tomorrow," Emmett said, slapping me on the back. I yelled out in pain and jerked away from his hand once it hit the fresh tattoo that lay under my shirt. He jerked his hand back and everyone stopped to see what was going on. Bella stared at me with wide eyes.

"Oh God, did he…?" Bella asked her voice full of pain for me. It was almost like she was feeling the pain with me. I closed my eyes, clenching my teeth and nodding my head.

"What happened?" Emmett questioned.

"Nothing, I'll be alright," I said, holding my breath.

Bella began rubbing across my back softly, trying to sooth some of the sting away.

"What the hell is going on?" Emmett asked.

"Oh my God, did you go see Jenks?" Alice asked. Bella and I both stared at her with wide eyes. "Did you both get tattoos?"

"Tattoos…?" Everyone said in unison.

"Is that what happened?" Jasper asked. "Dude that must suck, I've had that happen to me before." I suddenly remembered that Jasper had quite a few tattoos that were mostly covered up. It was probably how Alice knew what was going on.

"You got a tattoo?" My dad asked, almost shouting. I nodded my head nervously. "Well, get in the house, so I can check it out." We all started walking back towards the house and I grabbed Bella's hand squeezing it. She held onto my arm with her free hand as we walked.

Once inside, my dad had me sit down on one of the stools in the kitchen. Everyone was standing around watching. I removed my shirt then pulled Bella in front of me. I buried my head in her stomach and wrapped my arms around her waist. She soothingly rubbed the back of my neck.

My dad removed the bandage that covered the tattoo and slowly began cleaning and inspecting it. He put some ointment on then re-bandaged it. "I think it looks okay. It shouldn't be a problem. It'll just sting for a little while." I nodded my head and began to get up from the chair.

"Did you get one as well?" He asked Bella. She jerked her head towards everyone standing off to the side before nodding her head. "Would you mind if I take a look and re-dress it, so it doesn't get infected?" She walked closer to him and pulled the top of her jeans down just enough to reveal the bandage.

I wrapped an arm around her shoulders letting her lean back on me while he cleaned it. Everyone in the room was completely silent and it made me nervous. I had no idea what any of them were thinking. Once my dad was done with Bella I decided to ignore everyone's silence and just pretend like it was no big deal. I led Bella into the living room and sat her down next to me. Slowly everyone else began coming in behind us.

"I can't believe you both got a tattoo," Alice said in shock.

"I think it's awesome," Jasper added.

"Me too," Seth chimed in.

"I got a peak when dad was re-dressing them. It looked like some sort of symbol or tribal thing. Are they the same thing?" I nodded my head.

"It's a Japanese symbol," Bella answered.

"What's the symbol mean?" Rosalie asked.

"It means love," she said. "It's like the symbol in the picture Edward made me."

Alice and Rose both let out an exaggerated sigh. "That's so sweet," Alice said.

Rose hit Emmett across the chest, and he flinched away. "Why don't you ever do sweet things like that for me?" She questioned him.

"I do baby, just not like that," he said, trying to be sweet. "If you want me to go get your name tattooed across my chest I will." She rolled her eyes.

"You can't copy what they already did. You need to come up with your own creative romantic thing."

"Maybe I need to take some pointers from my little brother then," he said. I rolled my eyes.

I was in quite a bit of pain and personally I didn't want to be in this room where something could slip about James. "Let's go to bed," I whispered in Bella's ear. She nodded her head. I stood up and helped her to her feet.

"Where are you two going?" Rose asked.

"We're going to bed," I replied.

"You're going to bed? It's only 8 o'clock." Emmett said.

"Well, I'd rather spend the rest of my night with Bella than with any of you. So goodnight," I said.

Everyone began to say goodnight and I saw Kate and my parent's come around the corner from the kitchen to tell us goodnight as well.

"Remember Bella, I'll be here tomorrow afternoon to help you get ready for your date," Alice shouted after her. She nodded her head and smiled before following behind me up the stairs.

"I don't think they were too happy about the tattoo," Bella said, as soon as we were locked in the room.

"Who wasn't happy, my parents or your aunt?" I asked.

"Any of them," she clarified. "They stayed in the kitchen after everyone else went in the living room. I'm sure they were discussing what we did."

Do you regret getting the tattoo?" I asked. She shook her head. "Then don't worry about it. If they're upset let them. They can't tell us what to do. We did this for us and no one else. That's all that matters."

"Okay," she said, quietly.

We both put on some comfortable clothes and got in the covers. I grabbed the remote off the nightstand and started flipping through channels on the TV. There wasn't anything good on, so I flipped it off and just curled up next to her on my side to fall asleep.

The next day, I decided I wanted to take Bella driving. Not only would it be good for her to venture out like that, but it was also a way to get her out of the house. She didn't want to at first, but I convinced her to try. We went back to the empty parking lot first and I had her practice a little there before we started out on the road.

I don't know what she was so intimidated of, she did amazing. And as time went by she began to relax more and more.

When we got back to the house I saw Alice's car in the driveway and she stepped out on the porch with her hands on her hips, tapping her foot.

"Where have you been?" She shouted. "I can't make you look beautiful if you don't give me time."

"She already is beautiful Alice. You don't need to do anything," I said, trying to make Alice shut up. Didn't she understand what getting upset about being a little late would do to Bella? I was already frustrated with Alice and I seriously thought about just leaving right then with Bella. But I didn't. Instead I let Alice take her away from me and lead her upstairs. I went down to the basement and took a shower down there, knowing the bathroom upstairs would be occupied for the next couple hours. I got dressed in a suit, which I very rarely ever wore, and fixed my hair the best I could before going into town to pick up some flowers.

The lady at the flower shop suggested I buy the white roses with red tips. She said they meant loyalty and unity. That two became one and that was exactly what we were. I picked up a dozen of them along with a vase to put them in and one single red rose. I drove back to the house and called Alice asking her if she was about done. She said they were almost ready, so I went in the house and saw Leah sitting on the couch reading a book.

"Leah, can you bring these up to Bella?" I asked. She looked up from her book and saw the bouquet of flowers. She smiled and excitedly ran across the room taking the vase from me and rushing up stairs. I could hear Alice squeal from downstairs and I knew I must have chosen the right ones if she was pleased.

I waited at the bottom of the steps for them to come down. Both my parents walked in and gave me pleased smiles. "Have fun tonight son," my dad greeted.

"Thanks," I said.

"So, where are you taking her tonight?" my mom asked. "It must be somewhere special, considering you're wearing a suit and Alice has been up there for the last two hours prepping Bella."

"I'm just taking her to dinner to a place in Seattle," I responded. She nodded and smiled sweetly at me.

"Can I ask whose idea it was to get a tattoo?" She asked.

"It was Bella's. I didn't know anything about it, but she really wanted to do it for herself, so I decided to get one as well. She sort of talked me into it," I explained.

"Bella, wanted to get a tattoo?" My dad questioned.

"Yeah, I don't know why it was so important to her, but I think she really needed it to build some confidence."

"Well, I agree there," he said. "Ever since she's been back and James was caught she's a whole new person. She seems really happy too. Seth and Leah do as well."

"By the way, have you heard anything from Emmett about him being transported?" I asked.

"He let us know last night that he was back. They have him incarcerated in Seattle and the attorney's on the case are building a case against him. We probably won't have to go to trial until mid-summer I believe," he explained. I nodded my head.

"No one has said anything to Bella, Seth, or Leah though, right?" I wondered.

"No, we talked with Kate last night about it and we all felt it best that we wait a little longer," my mom said.

"Good," I sighed. "I don't want her to know that he's back here just yet. I'd rather just forget about him completely, but I know we can't, at least not yet."

"Everything will be fine, Edward. He'll pay for what he did," my dad said, just as I heard giggling at the top of the stairs.

I turned my head and saw Bella begin walking down the steps, smiling at me the whole way down. She was dressed in a knee length white dress with a black tie across her middle. Her hair was all done up in loose curls that cascaded down her back. She had just a small portion of it in the front pulled back into a clip. Alice left her make-up light, which I was happy about because she didn't need it anyway. I smiled back at her and my chest swelled with so much adoration and pride that she was mine. I glanced down at her feet just as she was getting to the last few steps and noticed Alice had put her in heels. Just as I noticed it I heard her make a sharp noise and when I glanced back up she was falling forward. I caught her just as she lost her footing and helped her back to her feet. She blushed and glanced between me and my parents who were standing off to the side.

"Are you okay," I asked.

"Yeah," she said bashfully.

"Here, this is for you." I handed her the single red rose and she took it gingerly from my hand. She smiled down at the single rose in her hand.

"Thank you." I smiled at her and leaned in giving her a quick kiss on the lips.

"Are you ready to go?" I asked. She nodded her head and took my hand.

"Have fun tonight," I heard Alice shout after us as we stepped outside.

I walked around and held her door open for her. I drove out onto the road and headed out of town.

"I'm sorry for tripping," she said.

"What do mean you're sorry? You don't need to be sorry for falling into my arms. I'm glad you do actually. It gives me the chance to be the hero," I said with a sly smile.

"You're always my hero," she added.

"Well, I hope I can always live up to that then," I stated. I reached over and linked our fingers together bringing her hand to my mouth, kissing her knuckles and each of her fingers gently.

"Thanks for the flowers," she said.

"You're welcome."

"Alice told me they meant something," she said, quietly. I smiled crookedly at her when she said it.

"I know," I said. "They mean unity. That's why I got them.

"You knew what they meant?" She asked shocked.

"You don't go into a flower shop without learning everything there is about flowers. The lady in the shop spent a good forty-five minutes explaining every last one to me until I told her what it was I wanted them to mean. Then she suggested those ones and I thought they were perfect. The single red rose I gave you, means I love you."

"I love you too, Edward."

Most of our trip to Seattle was done silently. Occasionally, we talked about random things or about the tattoos. A couple times she started to say something, but then stopped. I didn't know what that was about, but I had a feeling it had to do with prom. I was pretty sure she was trying to tell me that she didn't want to go, but she didn't know how say it. It didn't matter to me though. Prom could never live up to how important and how special today and even yesterday were.

After the long drive and long ferry ride we finally pulled into the parking lot of a very nice restaurant that I had only been to one other time with my family. Dad had insisted on taking mom here a few years ago for mother's day and I remembered that it had everything I wanted for this night to be special.

I helped her out of the car and gave the valet my keys. When we walked in I gave them my name and ushered us down a long corridor into the private room. The small room was lit only by candlelight and the piano I thought of at the last minute was set up in the corner. To the far wall were the French doors that opened out onto the balcony and led down to the private gazebo. I took a peek out the window to be sure it was set up like I wanted it. I smiled to myself when I saw that it was. There were lights that led a path down the walkway to the gazebo and there were strings of lights hanging all around the gazebo lighting it up just enough.

I held out Bella's chair and helped her into her seat. The waitress came in, handing us our menus and taking our drink order.

"This place looks really expensive," Bella said, cautiously.

"Don't even worry about it Bella. It's well worth it."

When the waitress came back we gave her our order. After she left, I got up and reached for her hand leading her over to the piano. We sat down on the bench and I took a deep breath flexing and stretching out my fingers before I began playing the soft melody. She listened intently and watched my every expression. I was trying to focus as best I could so I wouldn't mess it up. It was the first time I had ever written a song that I actually liked and wanted to play for someone. But it was all because of her. She was my inspiration.

When it slowly came to an end, I laid my hands on the keys and released a breath I didn't realize I was holding in.

"I love hearing you play the piano. It was such a beautiful song," she stated. I smiled and turned my head towards her. I leaned forward kissing her long and gentle.

"I wrote it just for you," I explained. She looked at me with a shocked look.

"You wrote that?" She questioned. I nodded my head. She swung her arms around my neck hugging me tightly. "I don't deserve you, Edward. You're too good to me."

"You deserve so much more Bella. I only wish I can give you half of what you deserve," I said. I gave her many small kisses while we sat on the bench.

We were interrupted by the appearance of the waitress once again bringing us our food. We sat back at the table and enjoyed the meal, having light conversation while we ate. After we were done eating we stayed there and finished our conversation.

Eventually, I led her out the French doors and down the path to the gazebo. She looked around the whole place in awe. I was pleased that they remembered the flower petals on the floor of the gazebo. She looked back at me with questioning eyes. "I told you I could help you with the dancing," I smirked.

She gasped and gave me a timid look. I reached for her hand. "There isn't anyone else here but us. No one can see us or watch us. I'm going to teach you how to dance." I lifted her hands up and placed them on my shoulders then grabbed her waist pulling her closer to me. I started swaying us slowly before moving around too much.

"What if I step on your feet?" She asked, nervously.

"Then step on my feet. I'm not going to care, Bella. They're just feet," I said. She took a deep breath and started moving with me. "See you're dancing." I smiled down at her and she scoffed.

"I'd say rocking side to side is nothing close to actual dancing," she countered. I smirked and twirled her around in a pirouette before pulling her back into my arms.

"You know what I love about you?" I asked. She looked up at me waiting for me to continue. "The fact, that you are always completely honest with me. Even if you hold things in from other people, you always tell me the truth, eventually anyway." She looked down at her feet and her shoulders dropped. I knew that would get her to open up.

"Why didn't you tell me?" My forehead furrowed in confusion. "I know you knew James was back. Why didn't you tell me?" My shoulders sank this time. I didn't know who told her but I had a pretty good idea it was either Alice or Rose.

"Bella, you've been so happy lately and I didn't want you to lose that," I explained, apologetically.

"Edward, I would have been fine. He's in jail and I know that. I know he can't hurt me anymore," she said.

"I'm sorry. I was just trying to protect you," I apologized.

"I know, and I appreciate that you always want to keep me safe. But you also need to be honest with me. I don't want you to keep anything from me." I nodded my head.

"I guess it was kind of stupid on my part to think I could shield you from that information in such a small town," I said.

"It wasn't stupid Edward," she countered. "I just need you to understand that we have to do this together. We're a team right? I know I have to face him and I can't do that on my own. I need you to be by my side and support me. Not try to hide me away from it."

"I will always be right here to help you through whatever you need. I'll never leave you," I reassured her. She had tears in her eyes and she smiled up at me. She stood on her tippy toes to kiss me. Our kiss was short and sweet but every kiss meant so much.

"So, about prom," I reminded, after breaking from the kiss. She laughed. "I actually thought that's what you were holding back. I thought you wanted to tell me no, but you were too afraid to upset me."

"Actually, I planned to tell you yes," she answered quickly.

"You were?" She nodded her head.

"I already bought the dress," she added.

"You already bought a dress?"

"Edward, did you really think I was going to turn you down?" she asked.

"The thought crossed my mind."

"At first, I was a little worried about going, mainly because I didn't want to embarrass you. But Alice made me realize that even if I did embarrass you, it wouldn't matter," she explained.

"She's right, it wouldn't matter. And you could never embarrass me," I whispered.

She laid her head against my chest as we continued to dance.

"You know what I love most about you?" I asked. "How strong you are." She pulled away giving me a quizzical look.

"I'm not strong. Not at all," she tried to argue.

"On the contrary, Bella; you are one of the strongest people I know. Even through everything that has happened, you still hold your head up high and look at everything positively. You don't let all the negative stuff hold you back. You make me feel strong, like I can do anything as long as I have you with me."

"Do you want to know what I love the most about you?" I smiled and nodded my head. "That with every word you say to me, it completes me. Ever since my mom died, I always felt dead inside. It was like I had lost all my will to be me. I was just a shell of a person. But you came along and changed all of that. You brought out the part of me that I thought was lost all this time."

"It was never lost, Bella. You just needed to find it again."

"I love you, Edward."

"I love you, too," I said. I leaned in pressing my lips to hers. Just as I started to deepen the kiss there was a crash of thunder in the distance. She jumped and started trembling. I held her close to me, reassuring her that I was here. The rain was coming down in sheets and I don't think either of us even noticed it until that moment. "Maybe we should head home," I suggested.

"Please," she said, breathlessly. I took my suit jacket off holding it over our heads as we dashed back towards the restaurant. I was so afraid she was going to slip in those shoes she had on, but somehow she stayed upright.

We got inside and shook off the water. I paid the bill that was left at the table and guided her back outside. I wrapped my jacket around her shoulders as we waited for the valet to bring my car back around.

The drive home took a little longer than expected because of the bad weather. When we got finally did get home we were both so exhausted that within minutes of climbing into bed we were both sound asleep.

The weeks following up to prom were uneventful for the most part. Alice came around a lot to go over plans with Bella about prom. The movers Kate had hired to move all her stuff across the country finally arrived. She signed the final papers to buy the house that they had decided on just a day before they had arrived. Buying the house was done rather quickly. But in this small town when someone comes in wanting to make a large purchase with quite a large sum of money for a down payment, people normally push things along quickly.

Bella was so excited to be setting up her room and I spent a good portion of time there helping her unpack. She went back to her job she had at the hospital before she left, which I was glad about because I know it was important to her to be able to make her own money. As much as possible we would go practice driving and she was getting really good at it. When I told her I thought she was ready for the driving test she was hesitant about it but she went ahead and made the appointment.

On the day of the prom, Jasper and I went into Port Angeles to pick up our tuxes while Alice and Bella spent the entire day with Rose, Kate, Leah, and my mom getting ready.

Around five o'clock Jasper and I drove over to Bella's house to pick them up. Garrett answered the door when we got there and ushered us into the living room. He's here quite often. I think maybe he was starting to move in.

"They've been upstairs for the last four hours. I don't know what they could possibly be doing for that long, but I did just send Seth up there about five minutes ago and they said they were close to being ready, but who knows what that means," he informed.

We waited another half hour before all the ladies stared descending the stairs. Mom and Kate had their cameras in hand ready to capture every moment. Alice came bouncing down the stairs first in a long bright red dress and jumped into Jaspers arms.

Bella came down seconds later in a dark blue dress. It was strange the feeling that filled me every time I saw her. This time she walked very slowly down the stairs watching every step, so she wouldn't trip. I smiled as she reached me and took a breath and exhaling in accomplishment. I took her hand and slipped on the corsage of white rose buds on her wrist before bringing her hand up to my lips.

"Alright, let's get some pictures. You are going to want to save these memories," my mom said. I wrapped my arm around Bella's waist as my mom and Kate snapped picture after picture. I couldn't keep my eyes off of Bella and on numerous occasions, someone would yell at me to look at the camera.

We got some pictures as a group and my mom wanted to get a picture with each of us which made Kate want to do the same thing. They also took a few of just me and Jasper and then some of Alice and Bella.

Bella made one request to have a picture taken with both Seth and Leah, so I did the same. After an hour of taking pictures we were finally set free to head to prom.

When I looked back in the rearview mirror I could distinctly see my mom crying. She was always an emotional person and I was surprised she was able to hold it in that long.

When we walked into the gym that was decorated with streamers and balloons, it felt like all eyes were on us. I led her in and we sat down at one of the tables that were set up to the side. Alice and Jasper went straight to the dance floor. Bella watched them for quite a while and I could tell she was feeling intimidated by everyone around.

"Bella," I called, getting her attention. "Whenever you want to leave just let me know. We don't have to stay all night if you don't want."

"We have to at least stay for you to be crowned prom king," she smirked. I laughed.

"Actually, we don't. I'd rather not dance with Jessica tonight." It was customary for king and queen to dance and I knew she would probably be crowned prom queen.

"Well, as long as I get the first and last dance I don't care who else you dance with," she said.

I leaned in kissing her cheek. "You'll get all the dances," I whispered in her ear. I stood up and offered her my hand. She took my hand and I led her out to the dance floor. It didn't matter that it was an upbeat song. I pulled her close to me and started swaying us back and forth. My attention was completely on her.

"You look absolutely amazing tonight?" I said. She smiled and blushed slightly.

"You don't look so bad yourself," she said.

"You know what we should do this summer?" I asked. She looked up at me waiting for me to continue. "We need to go on a vacation. Just you and I, we can go somewhere tropical that's full of adventure."

"That's sounds like fun. It would be nice to be able to spend a significant amount of time together without being interrupted," she added.

"I highly agree with that."

"Where would you want to go?" She asked.

"I don't know. We should look into it later and try to find a place. Maybe we could go to Hawaii, or somewhere in South America," I suggested.

"Any place will be great if we get to be together," she said. I smiled.

"That is very true," I agreed. I leaned in and kissed her. I felt a tap on my shoulder and when I pulled away to see who it was, I noticed everyone was clapping and staring at us.

"Dude, you need to be on the stage," Jasper said. I glanced towards the stage and saw the principal standing up there holding the crowns. He was looking at me expectantly.

I looked back at Jasper trying to make some sense of what was going on. "You were just named prom king Edward. You need to go get your crown," Alice explained further.

"Oh," I said. I leaned in kissing Bella one last time before I had to let go of her. I looked back as I walked towards the stage and saw her smiling and clapping proudly. Alice went to stand next to her and put her arm around her shoulders giving me a look letting me know she would be fine.

I walked up on stage and got my crown from the principal. I found Bella in the crowd and smiled down at her. I stood to the side as the principle started announcing who prom queen was. I took a deep breath knowing that in a few minutes I was going to have to dance with Jessica and I really didn't want to. Not only did I detest the girl for what she did to Bella, but I didn't want Bella to see me dance with her. It would make her sad even if she said it wouldn't.

"By a landslide vote, this year's prom queen is…" he began. I glanced over to the side, breaking my eye contact with Bella for a brief second, and saw Jessica and her friends jumping around waiting to hear her name called. I rolled my eyes and tried to focus on the principle that was opening the envelope. "Isabella Swan." My eyebrows furrowed for a second when he said her name. I glanced over at Jessica who had a look of utter shock then I looked out at the crowd. Everyone was smiling and applauding for her. I met her eyes as she began to walk towards the stage. She kept looking around at everyone with a confused look on her face. I walked over to the steps, taking her hand to help her up the stairs.

"What's going on?" She asked.

"I don't know," I replied. "Just go with it." She walked over to the principle and retrieved her crown.

"Congratulations you two," the principle said. "Now your king and queen will have their first dance."

I took her hand and brought it up to my lips. Her face was flushed and I could feel her shaking. I wrapped my free arm around her waist as I guided her out to the dance floor. "It's okay Bella. I'm not going to let you fall." She relaxed slightly.

When we reached the middle of the dance floor I swung her around and pulled her into my arms. "This is absolutely perfect," I whispered.

"This is why I didn't want to come," she disputed. "I knew there was going to be a moment where everyone was going to stare and I know I'm going to embarrass you somehow," she whined.

"Baby, look at me," I demanded. She slowly raised her head. "There is no possible way you could ever embarrass me. I don't care what anyone else in this room thinks. The only person I see right now is you. And I want you to do the same. The only person I want you to focus on is me. No one else matters. Now just follow me." She nodded her head and I slowly started moving us.

As we danced our eye contact never broke. I probably had the goofiest grin on my face. I don't know what happened, but I was completely thrilled.

"Edward, how did I become prom queen?" She asked.

"Maybe because everyone loves you as much as I do," I responded.

"But it was supposed to be Jessica. That's how it always is," she said.

"Bella, just enjoy this. You deserve to be prom queen so much more than Jessica ever could." She sighed heavily relaxing even more in my arms and smiled up at me.

"Congratulations you two," Alice said, coming up behind us. "You both deserve the honor."

"Alice, how did this happen?" Bella asked.

"You can thank me later," Alice said proudly. I stifled a laugh.

"Did you rig the voting?" Bella asked.

"Of course not," she said, firmly. "I was just your biggest supporter. No one wanted to vote for Jessica so I gave them an alternative suggestion and everyone was happy to vote for you. Most people here know what you've been through and they have a lot of respect and admiration for your courage and strength. It wasn't that hard to convince people to vote for you." I couldn't be happier with Alice at this moment. I could see the twinkle and excitement in Bella's eyes. This moment would stay with her forever and probably always bring a smile to her face.

We danced and visited with friends for a little longer and every once in a while someone would come up to us to congratulate us. A few people said they voted for us specifically, because we were the cutest couple ever, which I couldn't agree with more. Lately everything was absolutely perfect.

Around midnight we finally left the prom. I drove her back to her house and as I drove I could still sense the happiness and joy she was feeling.

"Are you glad you went to prom now?" I asked.

"I'm very glad I did. Thank you for asking me to go with you."

"I wouldn't have wanted to be there with anyone else," I said. I pulled into her driveway and shut the engine off. I hopped out and walked around, opening her car door for her. She took my hand and stepped out. We walked up to the steps and stopped at the front door.

"I had an amazing time, Edward," she said. I pulled her close and leaned my forehead against hers.

"I'm glad. All I ever want is for you to be happy." I leaned in and kissed her lips sweetly.

"I'm always happy when I'm with you," she stated. "Do I make you happy?"

"Seeing you smile and your face light up with enjoyment always makes me happy," I declared.

"Then I guess we'll both always be happy then," she observed.

"I guess so." I leaned in, taking her bottom lip in mine. My tongue darted into her mouth. Our kiss was long and full of passion and love. Everything I wanted to give her. When she pulled away I wasn't ready for it to end.

"I should probably go inside," she said, unmoving. I hummed in response before pulling away a little more to look at her.

"Alright," I agreed. "I'll be back in the morning."

"I'll be waiting," she said with a smile.

"I love you," I whispered in her ear before kissing her one last time.

"I love you too."

She opened the door and started backing in. Once the door was shut, I went back to my car and started driving home. I missed her already and felt this pulling at my chest. I needed to be with her. So I whipped the car around and parked a short distance from her house. I walked down the sidewalk until I reached her house. I noticed that all the lights in the house were off indicating that everyone was probably asleep. I walked around to the back and looked up at the window I knew was hers. There was a small glow coming from the window. I noticed the tree standing right in front of her window and I instantly smiled coming up with a great plan.

I pulled out my phone and dialed her cell phone number.

"Hello," she said, surprised.

"You know what I miss most about you living with your aunt now," I started. "That I don't get to fall asleep with you in my arms and I don't get to breathe your scent in all night. I miss waking up next to your warm body. Now I just have a cold bed that is losing your scent more and more each day."

I heard her laugh lightly. "Are you already home?"

"No, I'm not sure I want to go home tonight."

"Where are you going to stay then?" She asked with concern.

"I'm sure I'll find somewhere to go," I joked.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm excellent. I need to hang up now. But can you do me a favor?" I asked.

"Anything," she affirmed.

"I want you to wait one minute exactly and then go look out your window. I left you something outside."

"Okay," she said, hesitantly.

"Just promise me you'll wait exactly one minute," I begged. "I don't want you peaking."

"I'm looking at the clock right now," she insisted.

"Then I'm going to hang up and once I do, start timing until one minute." I hung up the phone grabbed a rose from the bush against the house and began climbing the tree. Once I reached the top I placed the rose on her window sill and stood to the side of the ledge.

When one minute was up I could hear her walk across her floor and start to unlock her window. The window was the type that opens up side to side so she pulled both of them open looking out. When she noticed the rose I watched as she picked it up and brought to her nose smiling the entire time.

"So, I have to wonder," I said, quietly. I startled her and she jerked her head to the side. "Did you pick this bedroom because it was next to a tree or is it just a coincidence?" She smiled at me.

"How very Romeo and Juliet of you," she commented. I laughed because she was very right.

"Are you going to answer my question?"

"Well, I don't know. If I tell you it wasn't a coincidence would that mean you would be using it?"

I leaned down close to her. "Either way, Bella," I began. "I think this tree and I may become good friends." A huge smile spread across her face and I couldn't help but smile with her.

"Get in here," she demanded, grabbing my tie and pulling me into her room. We both laughed at first as she dragged me in. But once I was inside and our lips consumed each other, there was no more laughing or joking involved. It was just us. Giving each other all the love we could possibly express.


	23. Chapter 22

**Alright just a warning, this chapter is pretty intense. It's very hard for me to channel this type of behavior so I hope I did okay with it. **

**As always thanks bzeemomof4 and redlulu for being such awesome beta's. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters.**

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**Keep Holding On: Avril Lavigne**

You're not alone  
Together we stand  
I'll be by your side, you know I'll take your hand  
When it gets cold  
And it feels like the end  
There's no place to go  
You know I won't give in  
No I won't give in

Keep holding on  
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through  
Just stay strong  
'Cause you know I'm here for you, I'm here for you  
There's nothing you could say  
Nothing you could do  
There's no other way when it comes to the truth  
So keep holding on  
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through

So far away  
I wish you were here  
Before it's too late, this could all disappear  
Before the doors close  
And it comes to an end  
With you by my side I will fight and defend,  
I'll fight and defend  
Yeah, yeah!

Keep holding on  
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through  
Just stay strong  
'Cause you know I'm here for you, I'm here for you  
There's nothing you could say  
Nothing you could do  
There's no other way when it comes to the truth  
So keep holding on  
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through

Hear me when I say, when I say I believe  
Nothing's gonna change, nothing's gonna change destiny  
Whatever's meant to be will work out perfectly  
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!

La da da da  
La da da da  
La da da da da da da da da

Keep holding on  
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through  
Just stay strong  
'Cause you know I'm here for you, I'm here for you  
There's nothing you could say  
Nothing you could do  
There's no other way when it comes to the truth  
So keep holding on  
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through

Keep holding on...  
Keep holding on

There's nothing you could say  
Nothing you could do  
There's no other way when it comes to the truth  
So keep holding on  
'Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through

**BPOV**

The morning after prom, I woke up wrapped in Edward's arms. I smiled and curled up closer to him when I realized he was still here. I knew he would be, but there was always a part of me that still believed he was going to disappear.

He started to stir slightly underneath me and wrapped his arms around me to pull me closer. He hummed as he brushed kisses across my forehead.

"See this is what I like. Waking up with you in my arms," he whispered.

"Me too," I said simply. "But unfortunately, it's morning so you probably have to leave now."

"You don't think your aunt would be okay with me staying here with you every night?" He wondered.

"I'm not sure. But I don't know if I want to ask while you are already here," I responded. He chuckled lightly.

"That's true. I guess I should go then." He started to move out from underneath me. I plopped on the pillow while he sat at the edge of the bed putting his clothes back on. I felt him shiver as my fingers ran up his spine. I sat up and began kissing his shoulders, wrapping my arms around him. "What are you doing?" He asked with a smile in his voice

"Just making sure you're real," I whispered. He reached around and grabbed me by the waist pulling me down onto the bed and hovering over me. I shrieked when he did it, but his lips against mine silenced me.

"Are you still afraid this is all a dream?" He asked brushing my hair out of my face. I nodded my head. "Well, if it is, I'm dreaming too. So when we wake up I'll remember every second of this dream and come running for you." I smiled up at him before wrapping my arms around his neck and kissing him once again.

He finally did leave after much resistance from both of us. But he said he was going to go home and take a quick shower and make an appearance at breakfast before heading back over here to be with me.

After he left, I took a shower and changed my clothes before heading downstairs. Kate was sitting at the kitchen table when I walked in.

"So, how was prom?" Kate asked when I walked into the kitchen.

"It was fun. Edward was crowned prom king and I was crowned prom queen," I said nonchalantly.

"Bella, that's great. Wow, I'm so happy for you," she pulled me into a hug.

"Thanks," I said. "It was sort of shocking. I didn't expect it at all. But Alice for some reason convinced everyone to vote for me."

"She sounds like a great friend to have."

"She is," I responded with a smile. Kate walked back over to the table and picked up her coffee cup taking a drink.

"So, what did you two do last night?"

I got a knot in my stomach when she asked. Did she know he was here? "After prom he brought me home."

"You didn't go to any parties or go to the beach like all the other kids normally do?" She asked.

"I'm not into the party thing. I'd rather stay home."

"Well, I'm glad to hear that. Parties always turn out badly," she said, while beginning to walk out. I grabbed a bowl from the cupboard and began pouring a bowl of cereal. "But Bella, next time Edward wants to sleep over please ask him to use the front door and not the tree. I don't want to be the one to tell his parent's that he broke his neck falling out of a tree trying to get to your room." I was sure my face was entirely red. I stared at her with wide eyes, my heart racing. I didn't know why. It wasn't like she was clueless as to what was going on and it wasn't the first time Edward and I had slept together with her around. She was even telling me it was okay for him to stay. All I could do was nod my head and she smiled a knowing smile before walking out with her coffee cup in hand.

Once she was gone, I buried my face in my hands feeling completely humiliated. I stopped when I felt a tug on my shirt. I sat up and looked down to see Seth standing there waiting for me to answer him.

"I need a bowl. Can you help me?" He asked. I walked over to the cupboard and pulled out a bowl pouring him some cereal. We sat at the table together eating.

"Bella," he began. "If dad is in jail, does that mean we can't see him anymore?" His words startled me so much that I dropped my spoon.

"Do you want to see him?" I asked in a shaky voice.

"Not really. I just want to see that he's really in jail and know that he can't hurt us anymore. Would it be possible for me to see that he's there?"

"I can ask about it," I offered. I felt a relief come over me once I knew he didn't want to see him because he missed him or something.

"I just want to know that he's really there and he's not getting out," he further explained. "I don't want him hurting you or Leah anymore. I don't want to be scared of him. If he ever comes back I will fight him. Emmett and Garrett showed me some really cool moves and I'm taking karate lessons. I can fight him." I smiled at how silly he sounded.

"Seth, he's not coming back. We might have to go to court and testify, but he can't hurt us anymore. You can use your knew fighting skills on someone else," I joked. He smiled.

Just then Leah walked in and sat down to eat with us. She wanted to know every detail of prom. She was thrilled that I was crowned prom queen and began roaming around the house with my crown on her head for the rest of the day.

Around noon Edward showed back up and we spent most of the day up in my room attempting to get homework done. But somehow we always ended up kissing or joking around, so not much got done.

"I have a favor to ask you," he said, while we lay on the floor next to each other. I turned my head to face him waiting for him to continue. "I've been thinking a lot about us going away to college in the fall and I want you to start making a list of reasons why we should go to one place more than the other."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"I don't know where to go. I have to decide soon and I don't know what I want to do in life or what the right choice is for me or for us. I need you to help me make this decision."

"Edward, I already told you whatever you choose I'll follow."

"But I don't know what to choose," he said sadly. I sat up leaning on my elbows to look at him closer.

"What do you want me to do?" I asked. He sat up on his elbows as well. "I can't make that decision for you. I can't tell you what school you should go to."

"But this will affect you too. I need to know where you want to go. I need to know what's going to make you happy," he said.

"The only thing that will make me happy is being wherever you are," I explained. "I don't need anything else."

"So, if I told you I wanted to move across the country to a school on the east coast, you would be perfectly fine with that?" He questioned. "Knowing that you would only be able to see Seth and Leah a couple times a year, if that; you would be okay with that?" My head dropped at the thought. I wanted to be okay with this. I wanted nothing more than to follow him wherever he may go. But only seeing Seth and Leah a couple times a year would be tough. I felt his fingers grasp my chin and pull my face to his, brushing a light kiss across my lips. "This is why I need to know what you want." I nodded my head understanding what he meant.

"Well, I don't mind if you go to an east coast school, but I'd want to come back a lot more than just twice a year. Even if I came by myself for a couple days every couple months, would be better than nothing. I could get a job and pay for my plane tickets to come back when I needed to. There are just things in their life I don't want to miss. Other than that, I don't care where we go."

"What about the weather or the area? Are those a factor to you?" He asked.

"No, I don't care where we live. Are we planning to get an apartment or would you want to live in the dorms or in a fraternity?" I could get a small apartment in the area and you could come visit me if that was the case."

"Bella, I'm not living anywhere unless you live there too. We can get an apartment together," he suggested.

"Well, all of that sounds fine to me," I said. "I'm serious Edward wherever you go, I plan to follow." He leaned in giving me a quick kiss.

"Okay, well I think if I had the choice, taking into consideration what you want, I'd want to stay on the west coast. I'm leaning more towards Stanford. It will make my parents happy, it's not dreadfully far away so we can still fly back as much as we can, and I could try out for the football team. I think it's the right choice. And I think next year if you want to apply you could get in," he explained.

"That's sound great Edward. But before we get that far can we maybe talk about the vacation we were discussing at prom?" He laughed.

"Where do you want to go?" He asked with a knowing grin.

"I want to go somewhere warm. That is probably the only thing I miss about Florida. I liked sitting in the sun and here you can't do that much," I expressed.

"Yeah, I think somewhere warm would be nice. We could go back to Florida for a few days. I'm sure your aunt would let us borrow her house there."

"I could ask," I suggested.

"Good," he said with a mischievous smile while beginning to move closer, hovering over me. I smiled up at him just as his lips pressed against mine. His hand began to trace a trail down my side and when he reached the hem of my shirt his fingers pulled it up slightly, so he could reach the bare skin of my stomach. He left a trail of kisses down my chin and across my neck. I closed my eyes relishing in his touch.

"Bella, Edward, dinner's here," Kate yelled up at us. Edward groaned dropping his head to my shoulder. I reached up and brushed my fingers through his hair.

"Come on. We need to eat," I said, pushing gently against his chest, motioning for him to move off of me. He rolled over onto his back and closed his eyes, his hands pulling his hair back. I watched him for a few seconds contemplating whether or not I should tell Kate we weren't hungry and pick up where we left off, but I knew Kate had just ordered way too much food from the diner. She had Garrett bring it over, so we needed to eat. I rose to my feet fixing my shirt and hair.

"We can pick up where we left off later tonight," he whispered in my ear from behind when he stood.

"That reminds me. Kate wanted me to tell you that if you want to stay the night you need to use the front door instead of the window," I informed. He left out a low chuckle.

"Yes, I got the same lecture from Garrett this morning when I was leaving. He cornered me at the bottom of the tree and told me to use the door next time," he admitted.

"So," I asked.

"What," he wondered giving me a confused look.

"Are you sleeping over?" I asked.

"Obviously, Bella," he said, rolling his eyes. "Your aunt just gave me free clearance to stay whenever I want. I'm not going anywhere." I smiled, wrapping my arms around his neck.

"I can't believe in a few short weeks we're going to be graduating and moving away together. I'm starting to wonder if maybe instead of going somewhere for a vacation, we should go to Stanford and start hunting for an apartment or maybe even a little house somewhere that we can rent."

"I think you're getting ahead of yourself," he laughed. "Come on, lets go eat." He reached for my hand and led me down the stairs to the dining room. We sat down with everyone else and started dishing our plates up. Edwards's free hand rested on my knee while we ate. Occasionally he would begin rubbing the inside of my thigh, which would make me jump, Edward would stifle a laugh. I was sure someone had to have noticed a couple times. I finally pushed his hand away which he seemed upset about, but I couldn't handle it any more.

"Oh, Bella I wanted to tell you. I have some amazing news for you," Kate began. "I was talking with a couple people from my company and they have an intern program. I was telling them about you and how smart and dedicated you are. They are very interested in meeting you and maybe hiring you on as an intern."

I glanced over at Edward who was staring down at his plate with a saddened look. "That's great Kate. Is it a summer program?" I asked.

"Well, if you're interested I can take you in, so you can look around and get some more details on it this week sometime. Then you would start working as soon as you graduate. If things work out you could possibly stay indefinitely. If you show them that you are a hard worker and dedicated to the company they will pay for you to go to college, so you could move up in the company. Who knows, with the way you work, someday you could be my boss," she joked. I gave her a weak smile. I didn't know how to tell her that I wasn't interested. I hadn't discussed going with Edward to school yet. She knew I hadn't applied to any schools, so I guess this was her solution. I glanced over at Edward and he still had a look of worry on his face. I reached over and squeezed his hand, reassuring him that it didn't matter. He looked up and let out a breath and squeezed my hand in return.

Later that night when Edward and I were back in my room, I tried to explain to him that I would talk to Kate, and explain to her what our plans were. I wanted to make sure he knew this didn't mean anything and I wasn't going to change my mind.

"Bella, just go," he spurted. I blinked a couple times and jerked my head back.

"What?"

"I want you to go. I know it doesn't change anything. But you never know maybe you'll like what it is they do there and you'll want to make a career out of it. Just because you work there for the summer doesn't mean you can't leave when fall comes. It would be a good learning experience that will help you get into college next year too." He pulled me down on the bed next to him and wrapped his arms around me. "They might have a hard time letting you go though. You would be an amazing asset to their company." I laughed.

"Right," I said, rolling my eyes. He chuckled under his breath before pulling me in for a kiss.

On Wednesday, Kate picked me up from school early to take me to the company. We met with a few people and they showed me around. Then I had to go to an interview, where a lady at a large desk asked me lots of questions about what I wanted to do in life and where I see myself in ten years. Honestly I had no idea. All I knew was I wanted to be with Edward and I hoped we lasted that long. We hadn't even been together a year and here I was thinking ten years down the road. I felt sort of ridiculous thinking about it. I ended up telling the lady that I hadn't made any future plans and I was keeping my options open. She seemed to like that answer.

Before Kate and I left, the lady told me that if I wanted to intern there I was more than welcome to. She thought I would fit in very well. Mostly all I would be doing is coffee runs, passing papers back and forth between people, or making faxes or copies. It seemed like an easy enough, job. I told her I would have to think it over and let her know.

The drive home, Kate was going on and on about how great this was and how much I was going to love working there. She brought up the fact that they would pay for college if they thought I would be an asset to the company.

"Kate, I can get grants or financial aid for college. I don't need them to pay for me," I informed.

"Yes, but if it's offered you should take them up on it. You shouldn't let opportunities pass you by."

"I won't be there long enough for them to want to pay for school," I said hesitantly.

"What are you talking about?" She asked.

"Edward is planning on going to College at Stanford. I'm going with him. I'll get a job and next year I'll try to get in to College with him," I explained.

"Do you think that's a good idea?" She asked quietly.

"Why wouldn't it be a good idea? I love him Aunt Kate. We want to stay together."

"I just worry. You both are so young and you have your whole lives ahead of you. I'm not sure if moving in together is such a great idea. It may cause more problems than you might realize," she said.

"Kate, you told me you had planned to marry Garrett when you were my age. But that didn't happen the way you planned it and you were both miserable because of it, yet here you both are looking rather comfortable with each other. Why can't Edward and I be together now and not go through that long separation?" I asked. "I don't want to be apart from him anymore."

"Even though Garrett and I were apart, I would never want to go back and change anything. I'm glad I went to school in Florida. I learned a lot and have an amazing job now that grants me a comfortable lifestyle where I can provide for my nieces and nephew. I'm glad, Garrett and I were able to get back together, after all this time, but even still I wouldn't have changed my life. I don't want you to give up on an opportunity just because you think you need to be wherever Edward is." She paused glancing back and forth between me and the road. I stared straight ahead, not knowing what to say to her. "Just promise me you'll think about this. I think you would really enjoy working there and I can help you get set up in a little apartment nearby.

"What happened to you supporting whatever decision I made?" I asked, quietly. I was starting to get really upset. She sighed.

"I just don't want you to give up on a great opportunity like this for a boy, especially your first love. Who knows who else you may want to date in the future. He may even want to date other people when he goes off to college. It's going to be a whole new world when he starts college, especially if he's going to play football. He'll have girls throwing themselves at him left and right. Are you sure he's not going to be tempted by all that attention? Are you sure you aren't going to want to have new experiences? These are things you need to think about."

"I don't want anyone but Edward," I shouted, just as we pulled into the driveway. I jumped out and ran up stairs trying not to cry. I didn't want to think about ever being with anyone else. Edward was the only one I wanted. But was I the only one he would want? She was right, he will have girls throwing themselves at him and there's nothing I can do about that. He's going to be tempted by them, especially if I'm not with him, which made me think even more that I needed to go with him. But would it be easier to not see that then to be right there watching it happen? All of this was making me sick to my stomach. I threw myself on my bed and began crying.

After a while I heard my door open very slowly. I didn't sit up to see who it was. I felt someone climb on the bed with me and wrap his arm around my waist from behind. I grabbed his hand and pulled it to my heart leaning back into him.

"Baby, what's wrong?" Edward asked.

"She's pushing me to stay and take the internship. She's making me feel like once we move away together everything is going to fall apart and you're going to want someone else," I explained.

"Who is?"

"Kate," I replied. She keeps talking about how this internship is a great opportunity for me and how I really need to pursue it, so they can pay for college. I don't know if it's her way of trying to tell me that she doesn't plan to pay for college for me or what, but I never expected her to pay for anything. I can get grants or something to pay for college."

"You don't have to pay for anything," he interrupted. "I can take care of us, Bella."

"I know that but I don't expect you to either. I can take care of myself. I just don't understand why she keeps pushing this. I tried to tell her that I was going with you and she tried to turn it around that you aren't going to want me once you have all those college girls throwing themselves at you. She's probably right." I started crying even more and tried to lean into him. He pulled away and started to stand up.

"Bella, why do you always do this?" I stared at him in confusion. "Why do you always think that I'm going to leave you or want someone else? I don't care who tries to throw themselves at me. All I want is you. Why can't you get that?" He asked in an angry tone. He was looking at me expectantly from across the room. "What do I have to do to prove that to you?"

"I…I…I…" I stuttered over my words. I knew he loved me and only wanted me, but I couldn't help still having a small amount of doubt. He had never been mad at me like this before either. I didn't know what to say.

"You know what? Take the internship. Your aunt's right. It is a great opportunity and one you shouldn't give up. I have no right to ask you to leave. You stay here and I'll go to school at Stanford and in four years, or however long it takes me to finish, I'm going to come back and still love you as much as I do today. That will never change. But maybe then you'll actually believe it." He was shouting and pacing the floor pulling at his hair.

"Edward…what…" I fought to find the right words. I didn't know what he was saying. He paced even faster, groaning in frustration. "Are you breaking up with me?"

"No, I'm not breaking up with you," he said in a calmer voice. "I just need to think. I'll see you later." He grabbed the handle of the door rushing down the stairs. I heard the front door slam a few moments later. I jumped at the sound.

I didn't understand what he was trying to say or whether he was serious or not. I didn't want the internship. I had no interest in being in advertising or anything that required me to be a part of a huge corporation. I didn't know what I wanted to do, but I knew that was not something I could do. I would work there during the summer fine, but I had no plans to stay on. I wanted to go with Edward. It didn't matter to me if girls threw themselves at him. I knew he wouldn't do that to me. So why did I let my aunt make me start to doubt him?

I tried to call him later that night, but he didn't answer. I knew I had screwed up really bad and I wanted to apologize to him, but I felt like he needed time to think like he said. I needed time to think as well.

The next morning I went to talk to Kate before anything else. I was already shaking and terrified to stand up to her, before I even reached the living room where she was sitting.

"I don't want the internship. Not even over the summer," I expressed.

"Bella…" she began.

"No," I interrupted. "I'm going to Stanford with Edward. Anything you say is not going to change my mind. I love him Kate and I want to be with him. I don't care whether I'm giving up a great opportunity or not. You of all people should know what I'm going through right now. I don't care if you support me or not. I've made up my mind." She sighed, staring at me with sad eyes.

"Alright," she said. "I told you I would support whatever decision you made, so if this is your choice than I accept it."

"Thank you," I breathed. I turned and headed back towards the stairs.

"But Bella," she called. I stopped and turned around to face her. "If you ever change your mind later on, I'm sure I could get you in."

I shook my head. "I won't."

I went back upstairs and shut my door behind me letting out a large sigh of relief. I never thought I could do that. I was so used to doing what everyone told me, so this was all new to me. I was actually surprised she accepted my decision so easily.

I tried to call Edward again that morning with no answer. I called Esme, asking her where he was. She told me that Emmett and Jasper took him to Seattle for the rest of the week as a last minute guy's getaway. I thanked her for the information and went to go get ready for school. I was disappointed and worried that maybe I had really done something unforgivable this time.

All during school Alice kept asking me if something had happened with me and Edward. I didn't tell her though. I knew that once he got back and we talked everything would be fine. She did tell me that Edward came over last night and he and Jasper spent a good two hours talking in private. She said Edward seemed really upset about something when she saw him. Later that night, Emmett showed up and they all left. Jasper said they were going away for a guy's weekend and would be back on Sunday. Just like Esme had said. At least I knew she wasn't covering for him. It still didn't explain why he wasn't answering his phone.

Later that night as I sat slouched in my chair at dinner, pushing food around and not eating much of anything. I wanted Edward to call me. I looked at my cell phone obsessively waiting for anything. I texted him over and over, telling him I was sorry and that I loved him. I explained that I turned the internship down completely and nothing had changed, I was still going with him in the fall, if he still wanted me to. But still there was no reply. I didn't like it when he got like this. He did the same thing when I left for Florida months ago. He would shut down and ignore me completely. Yet he says that if I did take the internship he would come back in four years and still love me. Right now I didn't even know if he loved me still. If he did love me he shouldn't be ignoring me and telling me to take the internship. He should be fighting for me.

"Bella," Kate alerted, bringing me out of my thinking. "I know this is really bad timing, but I need to go back to Florida for the weekend. My house sold so I need to go back down and sign the final papers and get any last things that I left behind."

"That's fine," I replied, quietly.

"I should only be gone a couple days and Garrett is planning to come with me. It's sort of a little vacation for us. I hope you don't mind watching Seth and Leah for the weekend."

"I said it was fine," I said, in an irritated voice.

We all went back to eating silently. After a while of pushing stuff around on my plate I finally got up and started clearing the table. I went into the kitchen and started to do dishes trying to keep my mind occupied. Kate walked in shortly after.

"Bella, I'm really sorry if I caused any trouble between you and Edward. That wasn't my intention. I just want the best for you and I don't want you to settle for something just because it's what Edward wants. I want you to be able to do something with your life and make something of yourself. I'm just afraid that if you leave with Edward now, you'll change and eventually you'll be so lost in what he wants, that you won't stop to think about what you want. You're already doing it now. You, wanting to stay here in Forks was for him. Granted, I planned to stay anyway, but still I think you would have stayed even if I went back to Florida with Seth and Leah. Going off to Stanford with him even though you haven't been accepted there, is for him. Getting a tattoo…"

"I wanted that," I interrupted. He got the tattoo for me. It was my idea." She stared at me in confusion for a few seconds before finishing.

"My point is, Bella you need to do things for yourself. You need to make decisions based on what you want and what you need. Not what will make Edward happy or what will help to hold on to him. If you do that, someday you'll resent him. I don't want that to happen."

"I could never resent him for anything. And this is what I want. Edward doesn't ever make me feel like I have to do what he wants. He asked _me _what school I wanted him to go to. He never said "this is the school I'm going to so you have to go with me," we talked about it together. He wants me to go to school and I'm looking into late acceptance. My counselor said she would write a letter of recommendation and the social worker said she would as well and also explain the situation. I'm sure Carlisle and even Esme would vouch for me too."

"Why haven't you told me this?" She asked.

"I haven't told anyone. I just recently talked to my counselor about it and she suggested it. She even offered to call the school to find out if they would even consider taking a late applicant. I didn't want to say anything until I knew for sure it was even possible. Edward doesn't even know."

"Well, I'm going to have to make a few phone calls as well to help you out. I really want you to go to school."

"I will, whether it's this year or next I'll go to college and you don't have to worry about paying for it. I can get grants if I have to. Edward even offered to pay, but I'd feel horrible if I had him do that so…"

"Bella, you don't need to worry about paying for school. I'll give you whatever you need for school. It's not a problem," she interrupted.

"It's not?" I asked, confused. She shook her head in disbelief. "I just thought that maybe the reason you were pushing the internship so much was because you wanted them to pay for school so you didn't have to. I don't expect you to pay for school for me. I can figure it out on my own."

"Bella, seriously, I will gladly pay for you to go to school. I only said that because I thought it might give you an incentive to try it out. I really think you would be good at advertising." My face started to heat up and I ducked my head to my chest.

"Kate, I don't want to work in advertising. It doesn't interest me. I'm sorry." She laughed.

"Don't be sorry, I honestly didn't think I'd like it either, but once I got into it I enjoyed it so much. And now I can do most of my work at home, which is great, especially now."

"Even still, I'm not interested. At least not right now," I said.

"That's fine Bella. Just promise me you'll do things for you and not only for Edward," she begged.

I laughed. "You actually sound like Edward. He's always telling me the same thing."

"Well, that's good. I hope you listen to him better than you do me." She walked back out to the dining room and picked up the last few dirty dishes then brought them into me.

Later that night I decided to call Alice and ask if she'd heard from the boys. I wanted to know what they were doing and if he was okay. More importantly, I wanted to know if he was still mad at me.

She told me that they all decided cell phones were to be turned off for the weekend and only used in case of an emergency. So she hasn't heard from him. At least I felt a little better knowing that he wasn't necessarily ignoring me.

When I told her that Kate and Garrett were going to be gone for the weekend, she invited herself over for Friday night. I thought it would be a great idea and probably help take my mind off of things, so I invited Rosalie over as well. She gladly accepted and said she would be over right after work.

Once we got out of school Friday, Alice drove us to the middle school to pick up Seth and Leah then drove to her house so she could pick up her "supplies". I was scared of what she planned to do, but I was excited too. This was basically my first sleep over party, even though I was eighteen, but I wanted it to be fun.

Rosalie brought over pizza and picked up a couple movies. Alice went to work putting make-up on Leah and fixing up her hair right after we were done eating. She was so excited and giggly. Seth even got into it when Rosalie wanted to dress him up and slick his hair back. I just sat to the side and watched. After a while they headed to their rooms for the night, giving us some alone time.

We sat around the living room lounging on the couch, trying to pay attention to the lame movie we rented.

"Bella, don't be so glum," Alice said. "Edward will be back in a couple days. You know that whatever happened between you two won't change anything. He loves you."

"I still don't understand what you see in that boy," Rosalie interjected. "He's always so emotional and confusing. He goes from being happy and full of life to being angry or grumpy in a matter of seconds."

"But I do have to say he is very sweet to Bella," Alice said. I gave her a weak smile, thanking her for sticking up for him.

"He's nothing like Emmett," Rosalie argued. "Emmett is always so happy and goofy. It's very rare to not see Emmett full of joy. I think that's why I love him so much. He keeps me laughing and doesn't take anything I say seriously."

"He used to not be like that you know," I added, trying to be part of the conversation.

"What do you mean?" Rosalie asked. I noticed that both of them were staring at me with curious expressions.

"When Emmett flunked out of college he came home and he was miserable. He moped around the house for a while and didn't do much of anything, before he went to into law enforcement. Sure, he was like he is now before that time,but there was a small portion of his life when we he wasn't so chipper," I explained. Rosalie stared at me with her mouth hanging open.

"How is it that you know this and I don't?" She asked.

I shrugged my shoulders. "Edward told me quite a while ago. I don't think it's something any of them like to talk about. I know Edward thinks that his parents are embarrassed by what happened and they expect Edward to make better choices than Emmett did. But I think Esme and Carlisle are proud of both of their sons for what they've done. I think they wish things could have been different but what parent doesn't want better for their kids?"

"Bella, you and Edward are so much alike," Alice said. "You both belong together and I'm happy you've found each other. It only took me four years to actually pull it off too." I laughed at her and even Rosalie did because knowing Alice she was probably being completely serious in that statement.

After a few minutes we decided to turn off the movie and go upstairs. Alice wanted to do makeovers on both of us. We indulged her passion and let her use us for her fun.

When my phone rang I ran to answer it thinking it was probably Kate letting me know they landed safely, but when I saw Edward's name come up on the screen, there was a knot that formed in my stomach. I flipped the phone open answering it in a timid, unsure voice.

I heard him sigh. "It's so good to hear your voice." My tension subsided slightly. I motioned to Alice and Rosalie that I was going to take this downstairs. They both gave me knowing smiles. They knew who it was. I walked downstairs and sat down in the darkened living room.

"I'm glad you called. I've missed you so much," I expressed.

"Me too," he said. "I just wanted to call and tell you that I was sorry. I shouldn't have gotten mad at you. I just don't like hearing you talk about me like I'm some inconsiderate jerk that's going to dump you as soon as someone else better comes along. Because I can tell you right now there is no one better than you for me."

"I feel the same way about you," I said, trying to hold back the tears that were forming in my eyes.

"But that's the thing I don't get. I've been thinking about all of this so much the last few days and I don't understand why you can trust everyone else you come in contact with so quickly and easily, but with me I had to work really hard for your trust and I still feel like you don't trust me completely still. With Rosalie for instance, you trusted her so fast and never once doubted her even when I questioned her loyalty, but with me I still feel like you have so much doubt in me. I don't understand it. Haven't I proven to you enough that I love you and I would never hurt you? Bella I'd give up everything for you. I'd die for you. Why do you still not trust me enough?"

I was sobbing and my voice was cracking. "It's because I have more to lose with you. If Rosalie turned out to be someone I couldn't trust, then I could get over it. I'd be hurt but it wouldn't hurt me as much if it was you. If I give all my trust to you, then I'm risking everything. I can't do that yet. I want to Edward, but it would be so hard to go on without you if I gave myself to you completely. So I have to protect myself by keeping that little bit of doubt, so if everything comes crashing down on me it won't hurt as bad." I heard him let out a sharp breath, but he didn't say anything. "I'm sorry. I know that probably doesn't make sense and sounds ridiculous to someone like you but it's just how I feel."

"You don't need to be sorry," he said. "I understand and I'll keep fighting for as long as it takes until you can put all of your trust in me. I've told you this a thousand times and I'm going tell you again and mean every word of it. I love you Bella. I will only ever love you. I'm not going anywhere and if you feel like we need a break or you want time apart or you want to do something without me, then that's fine because I know no matter what you will still love me and I'll love you. I hope someday you will believe that too."

"Edward, I do believe that. I do. That's why I'm going with you and why I'm risking everything to be with you."

"I don't want you too," he said.

"What?"

"I don't want you to risk anything. I want you to go for you. I want you to do something that you want. I don't want you to go with me and work at some dead end part-time job while I try and make something of myself. How selfish is that of me to ask you to do that? I can't ask that of you. You should be doing something to make yourself feel important and worthwhile, not following me to somewhere that won't be any benefit to you."

"But it is beneficial to me. It's where you are. Wherever you are is where I want to be," I spurted.

"Are you sure?" Because I'm afraid that once we get there and I'm busy with school and football you'll be miserable and not want to stay. I want you to come with me, but it wouldn't be fair to you."

"Edward, I'm coming," I said sternly. "I already turned the internship down, my counselor is looking into late enrollment into Sanford for me and I have about a dozen people who are willing to vouch for me, so I can go to school at Stanford in the fall. If I can't get in this fall then I will as soon as there's an opening. I've already made up my mind and whether you want me with you or not I'm going. I'll be there by myself if I have to."

"What?" he asked with a confused tone. "You're trying to get into Stanford now?" I could hear the little bit of excitement in his voice.

"I didn't want to tell you until I knew it was even going to be possible. I still don't know if it's going to happen. But regardless of whether it does or not, I'm going with you."

"Are you sure?" He asked.

"Absolutely," I assured. "I'm trying really hard to have as much faith in you as you have in me, but you're going to have to be patient."

He chuckled lightly. "Bella, I can be as patient as I need to be, but please stop making me sound like I'm some douche bag boyfriend who's going to be tempted by every slutty girl at college. It's not going to happen. I only need you."

"Okay," I said simply. "I should probably go. Rosalie and Alice are here and they're upstairs waiting for me, so they can finish their make-over on me."

"Alright, I'll see you soon then. I love you," he said with so much passion and truth to his words.

"I love you too," I returned. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight. Have fun with the girls."

I hung up and sat there for a few minutes longer trying to make sense of what happened before heading back upstairs where Rosalie and Alice were.

They teased me about Edward and how he couldn't even go a couple days without talking to me. Alice wasn't as bad about it because she knew that something was up with Edward and I and I think she could tell that after my phone call with him, things were a little better. Rosalie decided that since the boys were supposed to have their cell phones off we should too. She didn't want Edward interrupting our fun anymore. So I reluctantly turned it off and went back to having fun with Rose and Alice.

I jumped when I heard the doorbell ring a couple hours later. It was almost midnight, who was coming over this late? Then I remembered Edward's words. I'll see you soon. I had a feeling it was probably him on the other side of that door. I smiled and jumped up to go down stairs to answer it. I think Rosalie and Alice knew who it was too because they both rolled their eyes when they saw the goofy grin on my face.

I answered the door anticipating being in his arms again. I swung the door open and my smile dropped. I couldn't breathe. All I saw was the gun pointed at my head and James' angry face glaring at me. I backed up slowly as he followed me in.

I heard Alice and Rosalie coming down the stairs giggling and talking freely. His attention shot to them and when they noticed him they both stopped in their tracks with scared expressions.

"Please James, don't hurt them," I begged.

"Shut up," he shouted, slapping me across the face with the back of his hand, making me fall to the ground. I cried out in fear as he yanked me back to my feet by the arm and swung me around holding me around the neck. "I want my kids. Where are they?" I glanced over at Alice and Rose hoping they wouldn't say anything. I didn't want them to get hurt because of me.

"They're upstairs," I said in a shaky voice. "Please James, don't do this," I pleaded. He motioned for Alice and Rosalie to move to the corner of the room with the gun. They did as he said watching him intently the entire time. Once they were in the corner he pushed me towards the stairs and yelled for me to go get Seth and Leah. I tried to beg him not to do this, but he pointed the gun at me again tilting his head like he didn't know why I was even attempting to ask him that.

I had tears streaming down my face as I stumbled up the stairs. I woke up Seth and Leah who were shocked and scared by my crying. I explained to them what was going on and they both started crying as well. I tried to hold back the tears so they wouldn't be scared. I reassured them that everything would be okay. We would get out of this. But I knew it probably wasn't likely.

As we started walking down the stairs I heard Rosalie talking.

"Emmett will get you. He won't stop until he finds you and puts a bullet in your head," she said. I closed my eyes wishing she wouldn't say anything. It would only make it worse.

"Not if I put one in his head first. But before I can do that I've got to take care of you two," he said in a conniving tone.

"No, please James, we'll go wherever you want us too, just don't hurt them," I said. He laughed loudly.

"You think I plan to take you with me? I have no use for you anymore. You and your little boyfriend are just a nuisance that can easily be taken care of." He pointed the gun back at me and I understood what he meant far too well. Seth and Leah clung to my sides. "I only came to get my kids and I'm out of here. You will never see either of them again. Well in all honesty you won't see the light of day again." He chuckled as he said the last part like it was a big joke to him.

I closed my eyes trying to calm my nerves and figure out how to get out of this. When my eyes closed I saw Edward's face, smiling at me. I was reminded of the date we had in Seattle where he told me the thing he loved most about me was how strong I was. At that moment, I knew I needed to be, before this man that I feared with every fiber of my body hurt anyone I cared about. Even though he wasn't here I could feel Edward all around me, helping me to be strong. I could feel his arms, I could smell his scent, and I could hear his voice. I wanted him here physically, but this was enough to help me be strong. I opened my eyes slowly only to see James dashing across the room towards us. Seth and Leah gasped and clung to me even more. I stepped us back and put my hands in front of them.

"You aren't taking them," I said with every ounce of strength I could gather.

"Bella, don't be stupid," he said through gritted teeth.

"You'll have to kill me first," I whimpered.

He laughed again. "Well, since I planned to do that anyway, it shouldn't be a problem. I think I'm going to enjoy killing you actually, you little bitch. You just had to tell your little boyfriend what a bad dad I was, to turn everyone against me, when it was you who caused all the trouble. Everything was fine until you decided to go off whoring yourself around with the Cullen boys."

He lunged toward me and I pushed Seth and Leah towards Alice and Rosalie. He grabbed my arm and shoved me to the ground. I looked over at Alice and Rosalie who were both crying and curled up in the corner holding Seth and Leah. I motioned with my eyes towards the door. Alice understood and shook her head no. I stared at her with wide eyes and again motioned for the door. She gave me a saddened look and dropped her shoulders in defeat, nodding once. She stood to her feet as quiet as possible while James yelled and screamed and kicked me in the stomach. This was their chance to get away while he was distracted. Alice motioned for Seth, Leah and Rose to follow as they quietly slipped into the kitchen and left out the back door. Even though James was still kicking me and yelling, I sighed in relief knowing they were out. They would get away and be free. I would sacrifice myself if it would keep them safe.

**EPOV**

"Hurry up," I shouted at Emmett and we sped down the highway.

"I'm going as fast as I can," he shouted back.

"I knew this was a bad idea," I said, regrettably while shaking my head.

"Just relax Edward. We'll get there in time. I'm sure they're just fine," Jasper said from the back seat. Even though he was trying to calm me down, the worry and fear was prominent in his voice as well.

After I got off the phone with Bella earlier and listened to both Jasper and Emmett crack jokes about how whipped I was and how I couldn't even go two days without talking to her, I went to take a shower. I needed to think. I didn't know what was going on with me and Bella, but everything just seemed off. Maybe it was because we both had these huge decisions to make and we were trying too much to make what we wanted work with what the other wanted. I wanted her to be happy and successful, but I also wanted her with me. But I didn't want her to come with me and turn down the internship and disappoint her aunt just because she felt like she _had_ to come with me.

But now if it was even remotely possible for her to get into Stanford with me, I could live with that. I'm sure her aunt would be thrilled as well and not have a problem with her giving up the internship. But with her not being able to trust me enough to not leave her or cheat on her once we were at college, bothered me. I would never do that. I loved her more than anything. I thought I had proven that to her throughout the last few months and even more so recently with the tattoo and dinner at the restaurant in Seattle and prom. After she explained why she still held on to the doubt I understood. It still hurt that she still needed to do that after everything we had been through, but I understood it. It didn't matter though, I still loved her more than anything and I always would. I would just have to continue to let her know that.

I was letting the spray from the shower run down my back while I leaned my head against the tiled shower wall, when I heard a loud banging on the door.

"Fuck off, I'll be out in a minute," I shouted.

"Edward, get out now we have to go," I heard Emmett shout. My heart started racing instantly as I shut the water off, almost tripping as I stepped out of the shower. I wrapped a towel around my waist and pulled the door open. Emmett just stared at me with panicked eyes.

"We have to go now, get dressed," he demanded.

"What's going on?" I wondered

"I checked my cell phone while you were in here. I got a call earlier informing me that the judge released James on bail. I can't get a hold of any of the girls at the house. Garrett is in Florida with Kate, mom and dad flew to Chicago to visit Charlotte and Peter. I don't know what else to do. We have to go, I don't want them to be in danger," Emmett explained. I was dressed and dashing out the door with my shoes and socks in hand before he even finished speaking. We flew down the stairs, knowing that the elevator would take too long and met Jasper outside who had already pulled Emmett's jeep around. We hopped in and sped out of the parking lot.

On the ferry we were all antsy and Emmett even tried to commandeer the ferry using police business as an excuse to get them to go faster, but a ferry can only go so fast. Once the ferry docked we were the first car out and once again sped down the highway.

"Oh God, please let them be okay," I prayed, pulling at my hair as a nervous habit. I dialed Bella's phone number once again, but wasn't surprised when it went straight to voicemail. Jasper was in the back seat doing the same, trying to reach Alice's cell. Emmett was trying to get a hold of Sam, but there was no answer. He resorted to calling a few friends from the police force in Port Angeles to drive into Forks and have a look around. He didn't want to involve the police or anyone else at first since we really didn't know if there was anything to be concerned about, but these were friends who were willing to have a look just for the sake of easing our minds. The problem was we would be there before they would. So we really wouldn't know if there was anything to be concerned about until we got there.

As we hit our hometown of Forks, everything had an eerie haze about it. It unnerved me. I knew something was wrong. I could feel it. It was like Bella was calling to me, begging for me to come to her.

As we pulled into the driveway, we saw Alice and Rose come running around the corner with Seth and Leah. It was clear that they had all been crying and were panicked. My heart sunk as I jumped out of the jeep before it even stopped and ran towards the house. I could hear Emmett yelling at me to stop, but I didn't listen.

I barged through the doors and stopped dead in my tracks, when I saw Bella lying on the ground in a heap with James standing over her.

He turned and pointed the gun at me. My breath was ragged and hoarse as my eyes connected with James'.

"Well, this is perfect. I can kill you both at the same time," he said with a sneer. I noticed him glance around the room with a furrowed eyebrow. "What happened to my kids?" He asked. Just as he asked that question Emmett dashed into the room behind me with his gun drawn and pointed at James. "Ah, the other Cullen boy comes to be the hero." I noticed Bella trying to stand behind him. He turned around grabbing her by the hair and swinging her around so she flew into the wall. She gasped and let out a small moan of agony. I wanted to run to her and take her away, but when I started to move towards her James shoved the gun towards me once again. I stopped

"Just hold on Bella. We'll get through this. I'll get you out of here," I promised.

"James, you don't want to do this. Just put the gun down and we can talk about this," Emmett tried to convince. "I don't want to have to shoot you." James laughed.

"You know you almost sounded convincing. Any stupid mother-fucker who didn't know any better would probably have believed you. But I'm not that stupid, Emmett. I know you'll never pull that trigger. You don't have it in you. You're too much of a nice guy to ever be a good cop," he taunted. I saw Emmett's stance drop a little. "Here I am standing directly in front of you with a clear shot, but you won't take it."

"He's a much better cop then you'll ever be," I expressed. "At least he doesn't hurt people for the fun of it. At least he actually cares about doing good things for this community. I think it shows great courage and strength that he doesn't want to shoot you. Unlike you who probably could care less about who you kill. You are a sick fuck who needs some help." He glared at me and tilted his head.

"Your boyfriend needs to learn how to keep his mouth shut, Bella. If he knew what was good for him he would have minded his own business long ago. But no, he had to be the hero. He had to be the one to come in and save the lying bitch from the only person who ever did anything for her." He turned his attention to Bella again, with the gun and his eyes. "I was good to you. I could have kicked you out on the streets after your bitch mother did what she did. I could have taken you to that cliff with your mother and made you jump with her. I tried to give you a second chance."

"You didn't give me anything but heartache and pain. I would have rather you killed me with my mother. I would have rather not lived the pain for the past eight years you caused me, Seth and Leah. You took everything from us. You destroyed us in every way possible. How can you stand there and say you were good to us? I hate you, for what you did to us. I hate you for killing my mother. I hate you for killing Leah's mom. I hate you for making everyone I care about fearful. You will never hurt anyone ever again, especially not my family." I was in shock of Bella's rant. I had never seen this side of her before. She was actually shouting at him and letting him know how much he hurt her. I saw his arm holding the gun drop slightly as his eyes drifted to the floor. I took a chance and took another step towards Bella, but he lifted his head quickly and pointed the gun back at her giving me a warning look. I stepped back putting my hands up in surrender.

"Do you want to know who the first person I killed was?" He asked. We all glanced back and forth between each other. "I killed my dad. I was sixteen and he had beaten me for years. He killed my sister when she was just a little girl and my mom took the fall for it. I hated her for that. She left me with him. Her last words to me were to be good and that she would come find me when she got out of jail. I did everything I could to be good for my dad. But nothing was ever good enough for him and my mother never came for me. She abandoned me and left me to be tortured and maimed by that man. So, I killed him in his sleep one night and took off. The thrill and excitement I felt when I killed him was exhilarating. I wanted to do it again. That's why I went into law enforcement. I thought I'd get the opportunity to kill again, but it would be justified. Little did I know it doesn't happen that way? I tried to be the good cop, the good husband. But I found beating someone gave me that same excitement and pleasure I craved. I never understood why my father did it. Why he hurt my mother and my sister. Why he took them away from me. But I understood it then. He was trying to make me stronger. He was trying to make me tough, so I wouldn't be weak like Bella is. Like Renee and Victoria were. I was trying to make you stronger Bella. I was trying to help you. But you gave up your chance. Although from your little outburst, I think maybe what I did helped you out a little. Too bad it's going to be wasted."

His words kept running around in my brain. I had heard this story before. "Bree," I said simply. James jerked his head towards me, with a shocked look on his face.

"How do you know that?" He asked.

"Was Bree your sister? Was she who your dad killed?" I asked.

"How do you know that?" He shouted again. I didn't say anything more before Bella interrupted.

"You didn't make me strong. You made me weak. You made me afraid. Edward is who makes me strong. He's gentle and caring and protective. That is what makes me strong. That is what you could never do for me. Seth and Leah will always live with fear in their hearts because of what you did to us. Your dad did the same thing to you and destroyed all your rationalization. You are screwed up James and you need help. Please, just put the gun down so we can help you. You're still my father and you're Seth and Leah's dad too. They need you to be a good dad. Please daddy," she pleaded with him. His arm dropped to his side. I noticed Emmett eased his stance next to me, slightly.

"Come on, James. Toss me the gun and we can figure this out," Emmett said. I looked at Bella who was slowly beginning to pick herself up off the ground and move toward him. I didn't want her anywhere near him while he still had that gun, but she wouldn't look at me.

"Baby, get away from him. Come towards me," I shouted.

"I won't let you take my kids away from me," he shouted, before raising the gun once again, the anger and fire evident in his eyes. I heard Bella scream "no" as she darted towards me. I heard Emmett tense up next to me. Then I heard two simultaneous gun shots go off. I grabbed Bella by the waist, twisting her around, just as I heard the shots and clung to her closing my eyes. I heard Emmett gasp with a shaky breath before dropping the gun in his hands to the ground. I looked up and saw James lying on the floor with blood gushing from his head. I looked down at Bella who had lifted her eyes to meet mine. I smiled at her briefly until I noticed the blood surrounding both of us. I saw her mouth the words "I love you" before we both fell to the floor.

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Sorry for leaving it at a cliffy but I love doing that and it had to end here for the next chapter to make sense. I'll try to have the next chapter up ASAP.

By the way as I mentioned in the last chapter, I entered a story in the "To Kill A Cullen" contest called "Take Care Of My Heart" if you are interested in reading it here's the link: http://www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/5720327/1/Take_Care_Of_My_Heart and if you already have read it or you do read and you like it please vote for it here:http://www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/u/2171754/killacullen# I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you


	24. Chapter 23

**A/N: **I know everyone was a little upset after my cliffy from last chapter and I was hoping to have this up even sooner since I know you are all anxious to find out who got shot and who dies, but like always, real life gets in the way. I apologize for the long wait. So after this chapter, there are only 4 chapters left including epi, then I'll be starting my next story. I know a few of you have already read the first chapter of my next story from the Haiti compilation and I'm glad you're excited to read it because I'm so excited to write it.

Thank you all so much for reading and reviewing. I appreciate everything everyone says. It makes me very happy to know so many people enjoy reading my stories.

**Announcement:** My entry in the "To Kill A Cullen" contest won second place. I want to thank everyone who read and voted for it. I was so happy and excited when I found out. Writing oneshots has sort of become addicting now so I'm writing yet another one for the AwkWard contest hosted by AngstGoddess003 and Manyafandom. I'm having slight panic attacks just because of who is hosting and who the judges are, but also because this story is so different than anything else I've written. It's not sad or depressing like my other stories are. But I'm having fun writing it.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own twilight or the characters involved.

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**Everything: Lifehouse**

Find Me Here

Speak To Me

I want to feel you

I need to hear you

You are the light

That's leading me

To the place where I find peace again.

You are the strength, that keeps me walking.

You are the hope, that keeps me trusting.

You are the light, to my soul.

You are my purpose...you're everything.

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?

Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

You calm the storms, and you give me rest.

You hold me in your hands, you won't let me fall.

You steal my heart, and you take my breath away.

Would you take me in? Take me deeper now?

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?

Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?

Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Cause you're all I want, You're all I need

You're everything, everything

You're all I want your all I need

You're everything, everything.

You're all I want you're all I need.

You're everything, everything

You're all I want, you're all I need, you're everything, everything.

And How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?

Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?

Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?

Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

**BPOV**

_When I woke up, I was in the middle of a meadow surrounded by __deep__ purple and lavender flowers. I had never been here before. I didn't recognize anything. I remembered James coming back. I remembered Alice and Rosalie getting Seth and Leah out. I remembered Edward and Emmett coming through the door to face James. I remembered hearing the gun. I remembered running in front of Edward to protect him. If I couldn't protect him any other way, then I would die for him. I knew James was going to shoot once I saw the anger in his eyes more prominent than ever before._

_I looked around trying to make sense of what was happening and I saw a figure standing in the distance. I started walking towards it but stopped when I saw it was my mom._

_She smiled and began walking towards me. I stared at her with disbelief. She looked exactly the same as I remembered, short dark hair, blue eyes, glowing smile._

_"Mom," I murmured._

_"Hi, baby," she said, sweetly._

_"Am I dead?" I asked, incredulously. _

_"No," she laughed. "You're just dreaming. Do you remember what happened?"_

_I nodded my head. "I was shot right?"_

_"Yes, but there's more to it than that Bella," she stated. "You fought against him in a way he didn't know how to respond to. You told him how much he's hurt you. You didn't give in and let him take Seth and Leah, and for that I am very proud of you. You did something no one else has ever been able to do. You broke the cycle and because of that I know that all three of my children are going to grow up to be wonderful, caring and giving people." I smiled and felt the pride fill me as she spoke._

_"It's all thanks to Edward. He's the only one who ever saw me for me and tried to help us. I owe him everything," I explained._

_"I know, and I'm glad you had him. He did an amazing thing for all of you. His entire family did," she added. "But you're strong on your own. You can do anything you want now without fear. You know the right people to trust and to love." I suddenly remembered what happened right before I passed out, the shots, Edward and I collapsing to the floor, and Emmett dropping his gun next to us. Were they okay? Did Emmett shoot James? Was Edward hurt when he fell with me?_

_"Where's Edward?" I asked her, in a panicked tone. "Is he okay?"_

_"You'll see him soon," she answered. My worry subsided slightly, but it didn't go unnoticed that she didn't say whether he was okay or not. But this was a dream, or so she said; so if I didn't know than I didn't think a figment of my imagination would either._

_"I want to tell you Bella how sorry I am that I wasn't strong enough to fight for you. I wish so bad that things could have been different for all three of you. I wish I could have been there to see you grow up and see what a beautiful and strong woman you have become," she said, in a shaky voice. My eyes started filling with tears as she spoke. "Make sure you remember that. Tell Seth and Leah that I love them and always will and that I'm always with them. Make sure they know as well, how proud of them I am for growing up to be such good people despite the situation I put them in." I nodded my head, unable to speak from the lump in my throat. _

_She came towards me and wrapped her arms around me so tightly. Even though it was a dream she felt so real. She smelled the same, she felt the same, and everything about her was familiar. "I love you Bella. I always will. Make sure that no matter what happens, you stay strong and keep fighting. You can do anything on your own. You don't need someone to fight for you anymore." She stepped away giving me a loving smile and placed her hand on my cheek. As she started to step backwards her hand slid off my cheek and she looked behind her. My eyes followed hers and I noticed Edward standing in the distance. A smile spread across my lips and I noticed the corner of his lips raise. I glanced over at my mom and she was smiling at me with an approving look then tilted her head motioning for me to go. I ran across the meadow as fast as I could and jumped in his arms. He caught me and swung me around. When he put me down his hands rose to my face and as he brushed the hair away. He looked into my eyes intently, like he was trying to remember every detail of my face. _

_We stood there for an immeasurable amount of time staring into each other's faces, without a word spoken. It was such an intimate and beautiful moment that only meant something to us._

_I noticed him take a deep breath. "I want to remember you just like this," he said, with a smile. I smiled back._

_After a while, we sat down on the grass and he pulled me into his lap. He said he wasn't ready to let go of me yet. I thought that was very sweet and probably something I would have wanted him to say._

_Whether this was real, a dream, or my personal heaven, as long as I got to be in his arms, I didn't care where we were._

_"Bella, remember when we were talking about how our dreams were intertwined in a way?" He asked. I nodded my head, turning slightly in his arms so I could see his face. "This time is no different. We're both dreaming and we're together in our dreams."_

_"You're having this dream too?" I asked._

_"I am," he said, simply. "And when you wake up, Seth, Leah and Alice will be waiting for you."_

_"Where will you be?" I asked starting to get that panicked feeling once again._

_"In your dreams," he whispered. I didn't understand what he meant, but I didn't push any further for information. Again, if I didn't know where he was going to be then how would he be able to tell me?_

_"You know how much I love you right?" He asked as he ghosted kisses across my hair._

_"Of course I do. I love you too. And in just a couple months we'll be graduating and in the fall we'll go off to college together. Everything is going to be fine now Edward. James is gone for good he can't hurt us and we can be free." He nodded his head but had a sad look on his face. It worried me._

_"I need you to do me a favor," he wondered. "My mom told me a story a while back about a friend of hers when she was a little girl that confided in her the abuse she was suffering from her father and how eventually her dad ended up killing her and her mother took the fall for it. That little girls name was Bree." My eyes shot up to his in disbelief. That was what Edward was talking about when he mentioned her name and why James got so mad._

_"Your mom knew James' sister?" I asked. _

_"I think that's what I got from what he was saying. But that means that whoever his mom is, that's Leah and Seth's Grandma. I think they might like to know her. And I think my mom would really like to apologize to her for not standing up for her friend all those years ago. My mom still carries a lot of guilt for that. I want you to tell my mom and help her find this lady," he said. I nodded my head. My head was spinning with this new revelation that it never crossed my mind that he wanted me to tell her, not himself. Or that I didn't know any of this information before so how did I know it now?_

_We sat on the ground for quite a while never saying a word._

_I leaned my head against his warm chest. "Thank you for making me so happy and saving me in so many ways possible. For being the one thing that gave me hope," I said. I felt him take in a shaky breath and his arms tightened around me._

_"Thank you for letting me in. You may think that I'm the one that did everything for you, but in reality you did it all for yourself. I was just there guiding you through," he declared. "You were the one that took a stand against your worst fear and kept everyone safe. If it wasn't for you every single person that was in the house that night would probably be dead right now. You did that Bella. You saved them."_

_"But I still got shot," I countered._

_He shook his head. "I moved you out of the way. The bullet only grazed you. You're going to be fine Bella." He pulled my chin up so my lips would meet his. His kiss was soft and simple, but it meant everything. He had my heart and my soul for all eternity. I would never want or love anyone else more than him._

_"I was only able to do those things because of you," I confessed. "I was only able to be strong and fight back because you gave that to me. You gave that part of me that was taken by James, back. You changed me so completely that I shocked myself when I did what I did."_

_"I'm glad I was able to help you. All I wanted, was for you to be strong and know that you can be, whether I'm with you or not," he said. "Bella, do you trust me?" _

_I lifted my head from his chest to look into his eyes. "I trust you more than anyone else in my life. I trust you with everything."_

_"Are you sure? You don't have any doubts or fears?" He asked. I shook my head vehemently._

_"I will never have any doubts when it comes to you ever again. I know that I can trust you with everything."_

_He gave me a pleased smile and started to stand. He reached out his hand for mine and I took it without questioning where we were going._

_"It's time to go back Bella," he announced._

_"Okay." We walked across the meadow, hand in hand and I never even noticed that my mom was gone. I wished I would have remembered her so I could have introduced her to Edward. She would have liked him. _

_When we got to the edge of the meadow he stopped. He tried to let go of my hand but I didn't let him. I turned around to face him trying to understand why he stopped._

_He gave me a weak smile. "I don't get to go with you," he said, simply. My heart dropped and the tears started filling my eyes. I knew what he meant even though he never said it. _

_"No," I cried. "I jumped in front of you. I fought back. I saved you. In all my dreams you always died but I didn't let him hurt you this time. I saved you. I saved you." I was crying hysterically and repeating myself over and over. None of this made sense to me. It wasn't supposed to be him. It was supposed to be me. I was supposed to protect him this time._

_He pulled me into his arms, holding me tightly to his chest as I cried. "Baby, please go back. Seth and Leah need you right now. They aren't going to make it without you. You need to tell my parent's that none of this was their fault. You need to make sure my brother doesn't blame himself. He's a good cop and he needs someone to tell him that. I need you to go on. I don't want you to stay here with me. I want to know that I did at least one thing right in my life," he disclosed._

_"No, I won't do it. I won't go back without you. I need you Edward. I can't go on without you. You're everything to me. How can you ask this of me?" I wailed. "Please just let me take your spot if we can't go back together. I was supposed to protect you. I was supposed to be the one to die, not you."_

_"Bella, you can't take my spot. It doesn't work that way and I wouldn't let you do that regardless. I'll always be with you. I need you to trust me this last time when I tell you that you can't stay with me. You belong with your family. You asked me once if I believed in fate. I do now. My fate was to love you and make you believe in yourself again. You can be anything you want to be now. You never have to live in fear again. You can go on and be happy. You can help my mom lift a burden that she's carried for far too long. That was my fate and I wouldn't have it any other way," he whispered the last part in my ear. I pushed myself off of his chest and brushed at my tears harshly._

_"No, if this is fate, then I don't want it. My fate, is to be with you," I shrieked. "I'm not leaving you. This is all just a bad nightmare. I'm going to wake up and it's all going to go away."_

_"Bella, listen to me," he asserted. I noticed that he had tears in his eyes as well. "When James shot I grabbed you and spun us around. The bullet grazed you and hit me. You're in surgery right now and you're about to wake up. I'm in surgery too but I'm not going to make it. But that's okay, because my life was full of everything I could have ever wanted. I had you. So please do this for me and go back to where you belong. Go back to where you are still needed."_

_I shook my head fervently. "I won't Edward. The only way I'm going back is if you're with me. You can't ask me to do this. I can't do it." I rushed to him balling my fists around the front of his shirt and looking up into his eyes intently. "Please, fight for me. Please, just hold on for me. You can come back with me if you just fight. I still need you." He looked down at me with hurt eyes. I could tell he was trying to be strong and not let the emotion get hold of him but he was failing. He had tears falling down his cheeks. "Please," I begged, one last time. "Don't make me go back with the guilt that I wasn't strong enough to save you." I knew it was probably a mean thing to say to him but I needed something to make him hold on._

_He turned his head around to look at something behind him. I tilted my head to look past him but I didn't see anything. He let out a long sigh before turning back towards me._

_"Go back Bella," he said. I started to shake my head, but he grabbed it with his hands holding me still. I looked up at him with pleading eyes. "Go back, and I promise you I will do everything I can to hold on. But you have to trust me when I say that you can't stay here."_

_"I'm not going back without you," I affirmed._

_He gave me that famous half smile, half smirk. "Always so stubborn, even in your dreams," he laughed. I didn't think it was anytime to be laughing. I glared up at him and his smile instantly dropped. He leaned in pressing his lips to mine once more. He let go of my face and wrapped his arms around my shoulders and pressing his cheek to mine, whispering in my ear. "I promise you, I will fight as hard as I can for you."_

_"Promise me you'll survive. Promise me that when I wake up, you'll be sitting there waiting for me," I begged._

_His face dropped in defeat. "I can't promise you that. All I can offer is that I'll try. That's all I can do. You're just going to have to trust me." In that moment I gave all of my trust to him. I knew without a doubt that he was going to be okay. He would never ask me to trust him if he wasn't sure. He kissed me on the forehead then pulled away from me, leaving me completely alone. "I love you Bella, I always will."_

_"I love you too, more than anything," I cried. "I trust you."_

_"Go, I'll be right behind you." The look on his face made me question whether I was doing the right thing or not but I had to trust him. If ever there was a time to trust him it was now. I turned around and started walking out of the meadow. I looked back once and saw his head had dropped to his chest and his hands were twisted in his hair. I almost ran back to him, but it was too late. I was already starting to wake up._

I could hear the beeping sounds from the machines when I started to come too. I opened my eyes and saw Seth and Leah standing over me with Alice and Jasper behind them.

"Hey, you're awake," Alice said, relief in her voice.

"Where's Edward?" I croaked. My throat was thick with anesthesia. I noticed Alice and Jasper give each other a look of fear.

"Leah, why don't you take Seth out to let the nurses know she's awake," Alice suggested. She nodded her head and took Seth's hand to take him out.

Once they were gone, I asked again where Edward was.

"Bella, he didn't make it," Alice said, regretfully. "They tried to do surgery but we just heard from Rosalie that he didn't survive. I'm so sorry Bella."

"No, he survived. He promised me. He said he'd fight," I cried.

"Bella, what are you talking about," Jasper asked.

"In my dream, he said he'd fight to survive. He promised me," I repeated.

"Bella…" Alice said, sadly, but didn't continue. She grabbed my hand and squeezed it. I jerked it back and started to get out of the bed. Both Alice and Jasper tried to stop me.

"You can't get out of bed. You just got out of surgery," Alice shouted, grabbing my arm to stop me. "Bella, please, you need to stay in bed."

"I have to go to him. I have to see him," I shouted.

"Okay, Okay, let's see if we can get a nurse to help you then. You can't walk on your own yet," Alice suggested.

"I'll go see if I can track someone down," Jasper said as he started heading towards the door.

"Bella, please try to understand. The doctors did the surgery, but there was just so much damage and he was too weak to survive. His parent's are on their way back now. Emmett hasn't been able to tell them yet since they're still in the air," Alice explained. "Emmett's pretty upset about it. I've never seen him so sad before. Rosalie is with him and trying to comfort him, but it's not doing much good."

I felt bad for Emmett. I knew he was probably blaming himself for all of this, much like I was. This was my fault. I should have never let Edward get involved. I should have done more to protect him. I should have done more to convince Edward to fight for his life. All I knew was I needed to get to him.

When the nurse came in she insisted that I stay in bed, but there was no way I was doing that. Finally, after Alice and I argued with her for a few minutes, she helped me into a wheelchair. She wheeled me down the hall where I saw Emmett hunched over in a chair sobbing uncontrollably. Rosalie was crying as well as she rubbed Emmett's back. The tears sprung to my own eyes so fast, I felt like I couldn't breathe. Everything seemed like it was in slow motion.

"Bella, you shouldn't be here," Rose cried out.

"I have to be here," I said. "I have to see him."

"The doctors aren't done yet," Rose explained. "I stood to my feet and even though I felt weak and I had extreme pain in my side, nothing was keeping me from that room. I pushed myself towards the door, praying I wouldn't fall, when I felt an arm come around me, supporting me. I looked up to see Emmett holding me up and guiding me towards the door. We walked in and the nurse said we would have to wait outside but I didn't listen, and Emmett never let go of me. I slowly walked towards the bed in the middle of room and took Edward's hand in mine.

There was nothing there, no movement, no warmth. I began sobbing when I realized he was really gone. I climbed up on the bed and laid my head against his chest. I felt Emmett's hand on my back, trying to comfort me, but it didn't help. Edward was gone. He lied to me so I would survive. He sacrificed himself so I could live. My nightmares and fears for him had all come true.

I reached my hand up and stroked the side of his face lightly, brushing a few strands of his hair back. "You promised me, Edward," I started. "You promised me you would fight. You told me to trust you and I did. I would have never come back if I hadn't trusted you were telling me the truth. Please don't make my last memory of you be of you lying to me. Don't make me go on without you. I need you."

"Miss, you really need to go now so I can prepare to move him," the nurse said in an irritated voice. I didn't like her and I wanted her to leave me alone. I ignored her instead. I wasn't going anywhere until I was ready too.

"Bella," Emmett whispered in a hoarse voice. "We need to go. You need your rest." I tried to ignore him, but after a few seconds I felt his hands slide underneath me. I knew it was pointless to fight it.

Just as I was being lifted up, I heard a garbled voice whisper so lightly "Bella". I didn't know what it was, but I jerked away from Emmett and grabbed Edwards's hand. It had to be him.

"Put me down. Emmett, he's alive. I heard him, he said my name. He's not dead," I shouted. The nurse looked at me like I was crazy at first and tried to say it was just the body's way of settling, but I wasn't buying it. He was alive. I knew it.

She eventually obliged and called the doctors in. I stood next to him, never letting go of his hand. He needed to know I was here. He needed to know I was holding on to him. Emmett supported most of my weight while we watched on when the doctor took out his stethoscope to listen to his chest. The room was so quiet, while he listened. I didn't need him to listen to his heart, to know he was still alive. I could feel him inside of me.

After a second of listening to his chest, the doctor ran out and brought in two other doctors who all did the same and listened for a heartbeat. Each one of them gave the other a puzzled, shocked look and instantly started working to get him hooked up to the monitors and IV's again.

They tried to make me leave once again, but I told them I couldn't. I had to stay with him to remind him why he was holding on.

Emmett did leave the room temporarily to let everyone know, they found a heartbeat.

The doctors couldn't explain how it was that he was still alive. They had pronounced him dead over twenty minutes ago. But somehow they were able to find a weak, slow heartbeat. They also didn't know what kind of damage his brain had suffered. I heard them talking about how even if he did survive there was a good chance he would never wake up. I didn't believe them. He said my name. He knew I was here with him. He was going to be fine once he woke up.

I had to trust that. I had to have faith in him. He was going to be fine.

Later that day as I rested my head against the side of the bed, still holding onto his hand, I heard someone walk in. It was Esme and Carlisle. They rushed passed the nurses and even me and went straight to his bedside. Esme was crying and looked to have been for quite a while. Even Carlisle looked like he had tears in his eyes.

Carlisle eventually composed himself the best he could and went in to doctor mode. He started rambling off words I didn't understand with the other doctor, making sure everything possible was being done. He thought it would be better to have him airlifted to Seattle so they could monitor and give him the best care possible. I insisted on going and no one tried to talk me out of it. I assumed Esme would say no and that she should be the one to go with her son. I got the impression maybe Esme believed me when I said that he needed me to be with him so he would hold on. He needed to know I was here with him and I wasn't leaving.

They prepped him for the helicopter and even though I wasn't supposed to be released, my doctor let me go in the understanding that I would be under Carlisle's care. Alice helped me get dressed quickly and before I knew it we were on the helicopter on our way to the Seattle hospital. Carlisle was with us in the helicopter to monitor him along the ride. Esme and I were sure everyone else was going to drive in to Seattle behind us. We were still waiting for Kate and Garrett to get back, but everyone had left numerous messages on their phones so they knew where we were once they got off the plane.

The entire ride there I kept whispering in his ear, to hold on for me and to keep fighting. I told him repeatedly how much I loved him and how much I needed him to be okay. He didn't ever respond in anyway, but I knew he was there. He just needed time.

When the helicopter landed we were greeted by four other doctors who rushed him to his room and started getting him set up. I wasn't allowed to be with him while they did this and sitting outside his room was torturous. I couldn't move around much, because of the pain in my side. It was getting really bad and I knew I would probably need some pain killers soon, but I didn't want to leave him to take anything.

The bullet would have hit me if Edward hadn't grabbed me and pulled me out of the way. Instead, it barely went through my side and then hit Edward lodging itself in his kidney.

At the hospital in Forks, the doctors did surgery to remove the damaged kidney, but he crashed just as they were sewing him back up. They tried to resuscitate him with no luck. They pronounced him dead and the nurse was left to prepare him for viewing and to be moved to the morgue. But just like he promised, he held on somehow.

For five days we waited for him to wake up. The doctors gave us little hope that he would be the same person as he was before. The brain activity he was showing each day was not looking good. But he still held on.

I very rarely left his side. Neither did Esme or Carlisle. We kept a constant vigil at his bedside.

When Kate and Garrett got to the hospital, they took Seth and Leah to a hotel close by and tried to keep them away from the hospital as much as possible. They understood what was going on, but none of us thought it would be a good idea for them to see him here, especially Seth. He always looked up to Edward and they were always so close that for him to see Edward like that would devastate him.

Rose and Emmett were never too far away and I knew Emmett wasn't taking this very well. I saw a side of Rose I never expected. She was comforting and supportive, but Emmett was a mess regardless. Not only did he have to kill someone, but his brother had come very close to dying as well.

Late one night, when Esme insisted I go down to the cafeteria to get something to eat I spotted Emmett sitting at a table in the corner all by himself, staring out aimlessly through a window. At first I thought I should probably leave him alone, but he looked like he needed someone to talk to so I walked over to him.

"Emmett, are you okay?" I asked. He didn't acknowledge me at all. I wasn't sure if he was ignoring me on purpose or not but I took a chance and sat down next to him, waiting to see if he would talk.

"He used to follow me around constantly when we were kids," he said, still staring out the window. "It used to drive me crazy how he always wanted to do everything I did. But I think what bothered me most was not that he wanted to be like me, it was that everything he did, he always did it better. But then he had to go and say that I was a better cop than James and that I had more courage because I didn't shoot him. I never thought I was a good cop. It was just something I did to keep busy and pay the bills. It was something I did to make my parent's proud of me even though I knew I was just a failure to them. James used to tell stories about some of the calls he went on before he moved to Forks. They used to thrill me and I wanted to live that life. I wanted the excitement and the honor that type of career brought. But now after hearing what James said about killing people, I don't want to be like that. I don't want that thrill he got from it. What if I end up like him?"

"Emmett, you could never be like him. You didn't kill James because you wanted to, or because it was exciting. You did it to protect us. I know that even when you had no choice but to shoot, you still didn't want to do it. That's what makes you different from James. You did your job the right way and had compassion for him even though he was threatening your family and had a gun pointed at your little brother," I explained. "You are a good cop. Edward knows that too."

"But am I really that great of a cop if I can't even protect my own brother?" He retorted. "If I couldn't even see who James really was? I'm supposed to pick up on these things. That's my job and I failed at that. There's still a chance he might not make it. He's been unconscious for five days now. The doctor's don't know if he's going to wake up. I hear all of them talking when they think no one can hear. They don't give him much hope Bella. I failed him."

"No, you didn't. He doesn't want you to blame yourself. He asked me to tell you that," I confessed. His head jerked towards me and gave me a quizzical look. I knew he was wondering what I was talking about. "I talked to him in my dreams. I know that might sound crazy, but he was there. He asked me to tell everyone certain things, but I haven't yet because I want him to be the one to do it. If I tell everyone what he said, I feel like that would be me giving up on him. I think you need to hear that Edward never saw you as a failure. He always saw you as someone he admired and could trust no matter what. Please don't blame yourself for any of this. He wouldn't want that. And don't give up hope. He's going to be fine Emmett. He promised me. He just needs time." He stared at me with a blank look on his face and his mouth hanging open in disbelief. "I have to get back to him now." I stood up, putting pressure on my side with my palm to ease the pain and pushed in my chair before walking towards the entry.

"Bella," he called out. I stopped and turned around to face him. "Thank you." I gave him a smile and nodded my head before heading back towards the elevators.

When I got back to his room, Carlisle was gone. I figured he went back to the hotel for a few hours to shower and get some rest. It made me realize that I hadn't left Edward more than a few minutes at a time and hadn't showered all week. I changed my clothes daily as well as cleaning up the best I could with a washcloth, but I hadn't washed my hair or had a good shower in days. I felt grimy and for the first time started to wonder if maybe I should clean up a little. I didn't want to look dirty or ugly when he did wake up. I didn't want him to be disgusted by my appearance. But I'd worry about that later. Right now I just wanted to be with him.

Esme was asleep in the chair next to him, so I grabbed a blanket out of the closet and covered her up before sitting down next to him on the other side. I took his hand in mine linking our fingers together. I laid my head on the pillow next to him and brought his hand to my lips, kissing it gently like he always does to me. I rested our linked hands against my cheek.

"I'm not letting you go Edward," I whispered. "You have to hold on for me. I did for you, now I need you to do the same for me. I trust you to come back to me." I closed my eyes, letting the exhaustion overtake me.

I was only asleep a few minutes when I felt a finger brush across my cheek. My eyes shot open so fast and I sat up to look at him. I didn't know if what I felt was real or if it was just my imagination. I watched his hand and squeezed it gently hoping for some sort of response.

"Edward, if you can hear me squeeze my hand," I begged. Esme started to stir on the other side of the bed. I waited and waited. There was nothing.

"What happened?" Esme asked.

"I think he moved. I think his finger brushed across my cheek when I was lying on his pillow."

"Has he responded since then?" She asked. The hope and excitement, evident in her voice as she grabbed his other hand. I shook my head letting her know there hasn't been anything.

"Edward," she said. "Squeeze my hand, baby."

"Edward, I know you can hear me. I know you're holding on for me so prove to me that I didn't imagine you brushing your finger across my cheek. I know you did. Do it again," I begged, resting his palm against my cheek. "I love you Edward, no matter what."

We waited a few more minutes and still nothing. Emmett walked into the room and stopped in the doorway when he saw us both staring at Edward with intent looks on our faces.

"What happened?" He asked. Neither of us said a word.

"Edward, please. I didn't imagine it. I know you moved. Do it again," I pleaded. Just as I said it, I felt the slight movement of his thumb across my lips. I sucked in a deep breath and I felt both Esme and Emmett's eyes on me. The tears of joy filled my eyes and a smile spread across my face. I leaned down kissing him on the cheek and on the forehead repeatedly.

"He moved again. His thumb brushed across my lips," I explained.

"Edward, squeeze my hand now, please," Esme asked. Emmett ran out into the hall to get a doctor. Just as Emmett burst back through the door dragging a doctor with him, Esme let out an excited squeal. "He did it. He squeezed my hand." The doctor came over, checking his vitals and looking for any signs of improvement. Emmett went out into the hall to call everyone.

"Are you sure he was responding?" The doctor asked both of us.

"This isn't some figment of our imagination doctor," Esme shouted. "He moved. Now if you don't believe us, find a doctor who will." I stifled a laugh at her outburst.

"I'm not trying to say I don't believe you, ma'am. I just need to know these things so I can document them," he explained. I felt Edward squeeze my hand lightly and my attention went back on him.

"What is it?" I asked. He released his fingers from mine and lifted his hand slowly to the tube in his throat. The doctor stared at him with wide eyes and dropped his pencil to the ground.

"I think he wants that thing out of his mouth doc," Emmett said, from behind him. We all stared at the doctor and after a few seconds he shook his head, trying to compose himself. He walked over and slowly began pulling the tube out. We all watched, wondering what he would do next.

By now there were more doctors and nurses in the room. Carlisle burst through the door and joined Esme at Edward's side.

"Everyone else is out in the waiting room," Carlisle informed us. "Did he really respond?"

"He did. He squeezed my hand and just a minute ago he raised his hand towards his face. He's coming back to us Carlisle," she shrieked.

After a few minutes of complete silence from everyone while we waited I noticed his eyelids start to flutter.

"He's opening his eyes," I shared. Everyone in the room leaned in just a little closer to get a better look.

He opened his eyes slowly and searched for mine. When our eyes met he smiled. "There's my beautiful girl," he said so quietly and hoarsely, I could barely make it out. I smiled and giggled in relief. "I told you, you could trust me."

"I did trust you. I never had any doubt you'd come back to me," I said. His hand raised and brushed away a tear that was sliding down my cheek.

"Thank you for having faith in me," he whispered. I nodded my head, unable to choke out any response through the tears. He closed his eyes again and brought my hand to his chest, hugging it tightly. I looked around the room at all the people who were watching us incredulity. I didn't care though. In that moment, I knew Edward was going to be fine. He kept his promise and he fought to come back to me.


	25. Chapter 24

**A/N: I know this chapter took me forever to get up and I'm sorry for that, but life has been extremely hectic lately. I'm hoping to finish this story in the next couple weeks so updates should come sooner.**

**Also I wrote a quick little story for the Awkward contest called Bloody Hell, so if you want go check it out here's the link: ( http://www (dot) fanfiction (dot) net/s/5823389/1/Bloody_Hell ). Voting starts tomorrow so if you read it and like it please remember to vote: ( http://www (dot) fanfiction (dot) net/u/2238935/AwkWard_Contest )**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or the characters involved.**

* * *

**There You Were: Jessica Simpson & Marc Anthony**

I was counting down minutes.  
I was wishin' on the stars.  
I was prayin' for a sign,  
And tryin' to beat the odds.  
I was dreamin' of you,  
Love before I saw your face.  
And there you were,  
Waitin' for that day.  
Then you reached through the hurricane,  
When you baby you called my name.

You broke through the storm,  
And you turned back the night.  
Baby you are the fire,  
Burnin' the midnight sky,  
And your love,  
Keeps taking me higher.  
Just when all hope was gone,  
Where the hero belongs...  
There you were.

Must have broken into heaven,  
Just to roll back the clouds.  
Were you on a mission.  
Were you seekin me out.  
Was I that one in amillion.  
Was I that one sacred kiss,  
That you couldn't chance,  
You just couldn't miss.  
then you whispers through the silent tears,  
When you swept away all my fears.

You broke through the storm,  
And you turned back the night.  
Baby you are the fire,  
Burnin' the midnight sky,  
And your love,  
Keeps taking me higher.  
Just when all hope was gone,  
Where the hero belongs...  
There you were.

Standin' in the middle of nowhere,  
With your arms wide open and you,  
You were the reason when there was no reason.  
In my life  
You're the reason in my life.

You broke through the storm,  
And you turned back the night.  
Baby you are the fire,  
Burnin' the midnight sky,  
And your love,  
Keeps taking me higher.  
Just when all hope was gone,  
Where the hero belongs...  
There you were.

You broke through the storm,  
And you turned back the night.  
Baby you are the fire,  
Burnin' the midnight sky,  
And your love,  
Keeps taking me higher.  
Just when all hope was gone,  
Where the hero belongs...  
There you were.

Like the light in the eye of the storm,  
Tellin' me not to cry anymore.  
Where I watched my whole world fall apart,  
Shinin' through like an angel from afar

You broke through the storm,  
And you turned back the night.  
Baby you are the fire,  
Burnin' the midnight sky,  
And your love,  
Keeps taking me higher.  
Just when all hope was gone,  
Where the hero belongs...  
There you were.

**EPOV **

It was another week before I began to recuperate. That first week after I woke up for the first time, I still slept most of the day, only waking for short amounts of time. I think a lot of it had to do with the pain medication I was on. But it didn't matter when I woke up. Bella was always the first person I saw. She never once left my side and that brought a great comfort, knowing that she was still here with me and was holding on to me. I felt like she was the only reason I was still alive. I held on for her. She needed me and I couldn't leave her like that.

Neither one of us understood our strange connection through our dreams. And there was a point when we didn't even discuss what had happened. I think we both sort of wondered if the other knew what had happened or not.

I remembered the dream. I remembered seeing her and knowing I'd have to let her go on without me. But when she begged me to hold on and told me not to let her remember me like this, knowing she wasn't strong enough to protect me. I knew I had no other choice then to fight. Fight to live, fight for her, and fight for us. I couldn't let James take one more thing away from her.

It wasn't easy and many times I wanted to give up and let go, but it always seemed like in those moments, was when I would hear her voice telling me to continue fighting and not to let go. That always gave me the strength to keep going.

When I woke up I knew she would be there. When I saw her face all I could think about was all the pain I was in was well worth it to see that smile and know that her smile was for me.

"Are you thirsty? Do you want me to get you something to eat from the cafeteria?" She asked one afternoon while we sat in my room at the hospital.

"Bella, I'm fine. Just stay with me." I reached out for her hand pulling her closer to me. She sat down on the edge of the bed and brushed my hair off my forehead.

"I want to take care of you. You wouldn't be here if it wasn't for me."

"Yeah, you're right. I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you. I'd probably be in the ground right now," I informed. She rolled her eyes.

"I meant you wouldn't have been hurt in the first place if it wasn't for me. I caused all this," she said sadly. I wrapped an arm around her waist and tugged on her hand so she would lie down next to me on the bed. She rested her head on my shoulder and I held her tightly to me.

"You didn't cause any of this. I will never blame you for anything that happened. You're a part of me Bella. I'd do anything to keep you safe and protected for the rest of my life. And I know you'll do the same for me. That's why you saved me," I said. I could feel her smile at my words. She needed to know that she did in fact save me.

"I love you, Edward."

"I love you, too," I whispered and kissed the top of her head. We stayed wrapped in each other's arms for most of the day. For a while we watched TV and I fell asleep for a while, but she still stayed with me. Mostly we just talked. We tried to make sense of everything that had happened and come to terms with where our lives were heading. So much had changed and so much was still going to change, but we were determined to make whatever came our way work for the both of us.

Around five that night, both of our families came bursting through the door just as we were embraced in a pretty passionate kiss. I hated that every time I wanted to be close to her, it seemed like someone was always interrupting us. We broke the kiss and Bella sat up a little on the bed. Her cheeks were bright red from embarrassment which made me smile and love her even more. I noticed that Seth had on a party hat and my mom was carrying a cake in a box. Kate was holding a handful of balloons while Garrett carried a grocery bag.

"What's all this?" I asked.

"We're having a get well party," Seth said excitedly.

"It was Seth's idea. He thought you needed some cheering up," my mom explained further.

"Thanks Seth," I laughed. He blushed just like Bella does and a huge grin spread across his lips. Bella helped me sit up on the bed. I winced at the pain, but tried to hide it as best as I could. I didn't want anyone to feel bad for being here or think I didn't appreciate what they were doing.

"I have something for you," Seth said, climbing up on the bed, taking the spot where Bella was sitting. "Well, it's actually from both me and Leah." I glanced over at Leah and she smiled. I smiled back realizing how lucky I was to have all these people in my life. Every single one of them, were my family and I needed them so much in my life. I took the box from Seth and began to open it. Inside was a framed picture of the four of us when we went to the beach all those months ago. I smiled as I looked at it, remembering that day.

"I made the frame," Seth informed. It was just a plain wooden frame that he had glued small shells all around.

"I hope you don't mind that I went through your pictures," Leah said cautiously. "Seth wanted that specific picture to put in the frame because he remembered taking it that day. I found where you kept them on your computer and had a copy made of it. I didn't look at anything else though."

"It's fine, Leah. This is perfect. Thank you both," I said, ruffling Seth's hair playfully.

"I don't want you to forget about me when you leave," Seth said. I chuckled lightly.

"I'm not going to forget about you. We'll be back all the time. We're just going to college Seth. It's not that far away," I explained. He ducked his head and shrugged his shoulders.

"Let's have some cake," my mom interrupted from the other side of the room. She and Kate started cutting it up and passing pieces out to everyone.

"So mom," I began between bites. "Were you as shocked as I was when you found out who James was?"

"What are you talking about?" She asked, confused. I heard Bella cough a little next to me, putting her fork down on the plate.

I stared at her for a minute with furrowed eyebrows. "You didn't tell her?" She shook her head nervously.

"Tell me what?" My mom questioned.

"Why didn't you tell her?" I asked Bella with a sharp tone I wasn't intending to use.

"What's going on," my dad chimed in.

"I didn't want to tell anyone anything until you woke up. I was worried that if I gave in and told everyone what you wanted, that I was in a way giving up on you. I guess the excitement of you finally waking up caused me to forget. I'm sorry," she apologized. I took her hand and kissed it gently.

"It's okay, I understand."

"What's the big secret over there?" Emmett demanded of us. I turned and saw everyone in the room watching us intently waiting for some revelation to what was going on.

"Mom, remember that story you told me a few months ago about when you were little and what happened to your friend?" I heard her gasp and she raised her hand to her mouth. I waited to be sure she was okay with me talking about this in front of everyone. She had said that I was the only person she had ever told, so I wasn't sure she'd be comfortable talking about this in front of everyone. I saw tears forming in her eyes and she nodded her head. I took that as she was okay with me talking about it.

"James was Bree's brother. He sort of confirmed that for me when we were in the house."

"That's what that was about?" Emmett shouted. "I had no idea what you were going on about when we were in the house. I just assumed you were buying us time before back-up came."

"You're telling me that I'm the one that caused all this? All of you were put into danger because I didn't do anything all those years ago?" Esme cried.

"No mom that's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that Seth and Leah have a grandma out there somewhere that I think might want to know who they are. I think it would be good for you to find her too. Maybe put some of the guilt you carry behind you."

"But I did. I caused all this. If I would have spoke up all those years ago none of this would have happened. Bella, Seth, and Leah wouldn't have had to go through so much pain for so long. Bella's mom would still be here. You wouldn't have been shot. You almost died Edward. I could have prevented this from happening years ago."

"Esme," Bella stopped her. "If you would have stopped it years ago, Seth and Leah quite possibly wouldn't be here now. I might never have met Edward. We wouldn't have the amazing family we have now. I know it's hard not to blame yourself. I blame myself for everything on a daily basis. But in the end if we were able to go back and change something that we wished we had. Things wouldn't be the same now. And I like where we are now." I squeezed her hand and smiled. She returned the smile.

"It's all fate, mom. Everything happens for a reason. And I like where we are now too. I wouldn't want it any other way. Everyone in this room is important to me and I wouldn't have any of you if it wasn't for the events that lead all of us here. Whether they were good or bad, I wouldn't change anything. The good thing is that you helped break the cycle. You might not have been able to do something years ago, but you did something now. Seth, Leah and Bella are going to be able to have a normal life now and not have to live in fear or ever have to worry about being hurt again," I explained. "You were a part of that."

"When did you get all philosophical?" Rosalie asked sarcastically. Everyone in the room laughed. Leave it to Rosalie to change the mood in the room. I watched my mom wipe her tears, as she crossed the room giving me a hug and kissing me on the top of the head. Then she reached over and pulled Bella into a hug as well. I could tell Bella was hesitant at first, but she eased up after a second and returned the hug.

"Enough with all the lovey dovey stuff," Emmett said. "I'm still confused by everything that's being said. Who is this Bree person and how does mom fit into it? And why did you wonder if Bella had told us yet? How did she know?"

I looked to my mom and she took it upon herself to explain all the details that lead up to this moment to everyone else. The only part she didn't understand was how Bella knew. Bella and I tried to explain the strange connection we had, but everyone in the room looked at us like we were crazy. I think the only one who believed us completely was Seth, but he would believe anything I told him. I was pretty sure Emmett believed in his own way, but I think he was still not quite sure what to make of it.

"I want you to find Bree and James' mom," I insisted. "I want you to have the chance to apologize for not doing anything years ago, because I know it still bothers you that you didn't. And I think Seth and Leah might like to meet their grandma."

"Just promise me one thing before you go find this lady who you're all claiming is our grandma," Leah begged. We all turned towards her wondering what she wanted us to promise her. "Promise me that whoever this person is, she isn't going to come in and try to take us away. I don't want to go anywhere or have to live with anyone else." Kate crossed the room and placed an arm around her shoulders protectively.

"No one is going to take you away from me. I don't care who they are," she assured. "I won't let anyone take any of you away. This is where you all belong."

"Did we miss the party?" Alice squealed, bursting through the door dragging Jasper behind her. Bella and I turned towards them and I saw huge smile spread across Bella's face when she saw Alice. She let go of my hand and rushed to Alice giving her a huge hug. Alice wrapped her arms around her tightly like she hadn't seen her in weeks. It was quite possible that she hadn't. I didn't really know.

Jasper walked over to the bed and sat down in a chair next to me. "You gave us all a scare there for a while. Everyone at school was worried about you."

"I know. But I'm going to be okay. All the doctors are surprised how well I'm doing and they said I might be able to go home in a few days."

"That's great. Everyone at home is calling you a hero. Both you and Emmett," he declared. We both glanced over at Emmett who had a saddened grin on his face. I didn't need to ask him why. I knew. Even though he was being considered a hero and he did his job, he was hurting inside. He had to kill someone and even though he was a mean, and horrible person, it didn't change how Emmett felt, how I think all of us felt, but more so him. I just hope that someday we'll all be able to get past this and know it was for the best and nothing we had any control over.

"So when you get out, we have got to start making some summer plans. Alice and I are heading to NYU in the fall and I want to have some fun before we leave and never see anyone again," Jasper stated.

"We should try to do some fun things this summer. So much has happened this year, I can't even think about how much everything has changed and it's just the beginning of changes to come, I don't want to focus on anything but having fun for a while," I said.

"That will be a great way to start your speech," Alice announced. Everyone in the room stopped and turned to her.

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"Your graduation speech," she explained. "You aren't the valedictorian, that's Angela, but you are school president and home town hero, so they want you to give a speech."

"What am I supposed to give a speech about?" I wondered.

"That's up to you," she said. "But the whole school is looking forward to it. Everyone put together a get well card for you too." She pulled out a large card made out of poster board from her bag and handed it to me. Inside it simply said 'Get Well Soon! We Miss You!' and it looked like every student and staff member in the school had signed it. Some of the people who signed it I didn't even know, but it was nice that so many people cared.

After a while I started to get really tired and wanted to get some sleep. Everyone noticed that I wasn't into celebrating much anymore, so they started to leave the room, wishing me a good night's sleep.

I grabbed Bella's hand and pulled her to me making it clear that I didn't want her to go anywhere. She patted my hand reassuring me that she was staying.

"Edward, I'd like to talk to Bella for just a minute in private. I won't be long," my mom said. I looked up at Bella wondering if she was willing to go with my mom. She nodded her head at my mom so I reluctantly let go of her. They walked out into the hall and Emmett stayed behind for just a minute.

He sat down next to me and I could see the serious look on his face.

"Emmett, you don't have to say anything. I know you're probably mad at me for not listening to you when I ran off towards the house. But when have I ever listened to you?" I joked.

"That's not what I was going to say," he countered, seriously. "I just wanted to tell you that I'm proud of you. You are a much better man than I ever will be. You almost gave your life for the girl you love and I'm not sure many people could actually do that. I think a lot of men would claim to do it, but I'm not sure many would. That takes a lot of guts to do. It just proves to me once again that you do everything better than me. You fight harder, you protect harder, and you love harder. I see now how much you truly love Bella, mom and dad do, too. I just wanted to say I'm happy for you. And I'm glad you're alive. I don't know if I could have lived with myself if anything happened to you."

"Thanks Emmett," I said, not sure how exactly to respond to that.

"I love ya, little brother," he mumbled as he stood. Emmett wasn't the type to be emotional or say heartfelt things to me, but in that moment I believed him and I think it was his way of dealing with what happened. He was trying to justify what he was forced to do and I was glad he was coming to terms with it.

"Emmett," I called. He turned just as he reached for the doorknob. "Thanks for saving my life. You are definitely the best big brother anyone could have. And I love you, too," I muttered with a smile. He stared at me for a second before he chuckled and left the room.

I laid there for a while waiting for Bella to come back, but it took longer than I had expected and before I knew it, I was falling asleep. I woke a couple hours later when the nurse came in to check my vitals. Bella was asleep in the chair across the room, but she was also woken by the nurse asking me questions.

"Why are you all the way over there?" I asked her as soon as the nurse left. She got up and walked across the room sitting in the chair next to the bed.

"I didn't want to disturb you. You seemed really tired after the party and I thought you needed some uninterrupted sleep. Unfortunately nurses don't agree with that." I laughed, because it was very true.

"It's really hard to sleep without having you near me." I scooted over as far as I could on the bed and she understood what I wanted so she crawled up on the bed with a huge smile on her face. I wrapped her up in my arms as she rested her head in the crook of my neck.

"Do you know what you'll write your speech about?" She asked.

"I haven't really thought about it. It will probably be some sort of cliché thing about living life to the fullest and moving on to our future. Some shit like that. I don't know."

"Well, whatever you decide, I'm sure it will be great," she encouraged.

"What did my mom want to talk to you about?" I asked. She sighed. I knew it wasn't something good from the sound of that sigh. I started to get worried about what exactly my mom had said to her.

"She wants me to go with her to find the grandma. She thinks it would be best for us to find her before we introduce Seth and Leah. I mean we don't know anything about this lady, so what if she's not a good person?" She explained. "Emmett said he can use his connections to find out some information and hopefully be able to find out where she is. With what your mom knows and what Emmett was able to piece together from James' past he said it shouldn't be that hard. I told your mom no though."

"Why don't you want to go with her?" I questioned.

"I don't want to leave you."

"Bella, I'll be fine. It will only be for a couple days. I'm sure by the time you leave I'll be back home and maybe even back at school. I want you to go," I said.

"Edward, I want to stay with you. I don't know if it would be such a good idea for me to meet this lady anyway. What if she doesn't like me? And what if she hates me because her son is dead because of me?"

"My mom will be with you. She isn't going to let anything happen to you," I said. "And he's not dead because of you, so stop saying that."

"What about you? Someone needs to take care of you when you get out of the hospital." I laughed.

"Baby, there was just a room full of people here who I'm sure are more than capable of helping me recover once I get home. One of which happens to be a doctor. Besides, I think my doctors are going to want me up and moving around. I can't lie in bed all the time having you wait on me hand and foot. I'll be fine. I'll call you every hour while you're gone if you want." She sighed in defeat. "Please do this for me. I think it's something both you and my mom need to do."

"Only if you're sure you don't need me," she said looking up into my eyes.

I smiled and hugged her tightly to me. "I always need you. But I can make it a couple days without you for something this important." She nodded her head and leaned in giving me a peck of a kiss. That wasn't enough for me so I grabbed her face and pulled her in to deepen the kiss. My tongue slid across her lips and she opened her mouth willingly to me. My hand ventured down to the hem of her shirt lifting it up to expose the skin of her back. My fingers traced lines up and down her spine. My knee slid in between her legs. I could sense how much she wanted me. It had been so long and I needed to be inside of her.

"Edward," she breathed. I undid the button and zipper on her pants and dipped my hand into her panties. I brushed one finger across her clit and she moaned in response.

"I want you so bad right now," I whispered in her ear before taking her ear lobe in my mouth and sucking on it. She was panting and bucking her hips into my hand.

"We can't do this here," she said in return.

"We can be quick. No one will ever know." I tried to convince, sliding my fingers into her even harder. She responded by pulling at my hair and kissing me hard on the lips. Even though she said we couldn't, she wanted it just as bad.

I was taking full advantage of her need for me and not letting it stop. She kicked off her pants and I removed her shirt taking one nipple into my mouth as I rolled the other between my fingers. Her eyes closed and her head fell back on the pillow. I tried to move over the top of her but the pain that shot through my side as I did, was unbearable. I cried out and fell back to the side of the bed. Her eyes shot open and she stared at me with fear in her eyes. She was still panting, but I think it was more due to the fear than anything else.

"What did I do wrong?" She asked, frightened.

"Nothing, you didn't do anything wrong. I just can't move that way," I explained, through gritted teeth. The pain was still very strong as I laid there trying to calm down.

"Is there anything I can do?" She asked, nervously. I closed my eyes and shook my head. "I'm sorry. I knew it wasn't a good idea. You still need to heal." She sat up on the bed looking down at me still fully naked. I think it hurt more that I couldn't do anything with her than it did that I was in excruciating pain.

I placed my hand on her hips, rubbing up and down. "Baby, I'm fine," I assured. "But I think you're right. It's too soon. I need to heal first." She looked sad as she climbed off the bed and put her clothes back on.

I reached out a hand to her. "Bella, you didn't do anything wrong." She met my eyes and took my hand giving me a weak smile. I knew she was feeling like she had. I pulled her to me, so I could kiss her, but just as I did a nurse came rushing through the door.

"You blood pressure was going up a bit. Is everything okay?" She questioned, looking back and forth between Bella and I. I think she knew, but she didn't say anything.

"I am in a little bit of pain," I said.

"I'll get you some pain medication. I'll be right back." She left the room so I took my chance and pulled Bella to me kissing her fully.

When I broke the kiss I looked into her eyes intently and held her face between my hands. "I love you, no matter what." She smiled and leaned her forehead against mine. I kissed the tip of her nose as the nurse walked back in. She handed me the pills and a cup of water. She had a knowing smile on her face as she watched me take the pills down.

"Let me check your bandages to be sure everything is still in good condition," she said. She pulled the covers back slightly and lifted my gown to have a look. "You're going to have to take it easy for a couple of weeks. If this is going to heal correctly without any more complications you're going to need to rest and not have a lot of activity. Do you understand?" I nodded my head knowing for sure now that she knew. It killed me that I couldn't be with her. And who knew how long it was going to be until I could.

Once the nurse left, I insisted Bella lay back on the bed with me. She tried to refuse, afraid she might hurt me again, but I assured her that the pain medication I just took was going to knock me out within a few minutes and she couldn't hurt me by just letting me hold her while I slept.

Eventually she did climb back up on the bed and like I told her, I was asleep within a few minutes with her in my arms. That was enough, for now.

The next morning my dad came in to see how I was doing. Even though he wasn't my doctor, he still couldn't help looking after me like I was his patient. The good thing was that when there was something I didn't understand that the doctors were saying he'd always explain it to me better later on.

"So the nurses said your blood pressure shot up last night. Is everything okay?" He asked with a smile. He knew too, I could tell. I glanced over at Bella who was on the other side of the room attempting to do homework. I noticed her cheeks were bright red. I felt like blushing too.

"Everything was fine dad. I just attempted to move into a certain position and it didn't work out so well. The pain killers helped though," I explained.

"That's good to know. You're going to have to be careful for a while."

I rolled my eyes and huffed. "I know dad. The nurse already gave me the lecture."

I was thankful that my actual doctor walked in because I wasn't sure I could take any more uncomfortable stares and chuckles from my dad.

"So how are you feeling today?" My doctor asked.

"I'm doing alright. When do I get out of here?" I questioned. He laughed as he wrote stuff on my chart.

"Well, I'm not sure. After last night's rise in your blood pressure, I think we might need to keep you for a few days," he informed. I rolled my eyes yet again and I heard my dad stifle a laugh.

"It was really nothing. I was just trying to adjust my position and I moved the wrong way."

"And that is exactly why you need to stay for a few more days. I need to get you up and moving around so you don't do anything to hurt yourself once you get home," he explained.

"Dad, can you get me a milkshake from the cafeteria?" I asked. I needed him out of the room so I could talk to my doctor privately.

"Sure thing," he said. "Bella, would you like anything?"

"Oh, no thank you Carlisle. I'm fine," she said.

"So this afternoon I'm going to have a nurse help you out of bed and get you moving around. It probably won't be any farther than the end of the hall for now, but the more you get up and move around the sooner you can go home," he stated.

"Doctor, once I get home, how long until… I mean, I will be able to…" I stumbled. The corner of his mouth raised into a grin.

"Are you trying to ask me how long you have to wait before you can be intimate with your girlfriend?" He wondered. I heard Bella gasp behind him. All I could do was nod my head.

"I don't think you need to wait much longer. I think once you're up and moving around, you'll find it's easier to adjust. You will need to take it easy and not strain yourself though, which means not overdoing it or pushing yourself too far. I don't think you want to land yourself back in the hospital due to overexerting yourself," he explained.

"But it is possible for us to be… intimate again, right?" I wondered.

"Like I said Edward, just take things slow and don't overdo it." I nodded my head and sighed in relief.

Later that day, the nurse did come in and help me walk around. I was already able to walk short distances with help, but the doctor wanted me to be able to start walking around without assistance. The nurse and Bella stayed right with me the entire time and even though I was in pain, I kept pushing. I wanted to get out of this hospital and be home in my own bed with Bella next to me.

I regretted it later that night when the pain hit. But thankfully the nurses were all too happy to pass out painkillers and I was thankful for that.

At the end of the week, I was finally able to move around enough that the doctor said I could go home. Bella was thrilled and buzzed around the room all day getting my stuff and her stuff packed up.

By mid afternoon, my parents came to the hospital to drive us home. My mom was so excited that we were finally able to go home and she didn't have to live in the hotel anymore.

"All packed up and ready to go?" My doctor asked as he walked into my room with my release papers.

"I am definitely ready to get out of here," I said in return.

"That's good," he laughed. "Just remember what I said about taking things slow. I don't want to see you back here anytime soon."

"I will, but I need to get back in shape so I can be ready for football tryouts come August," I said. He stopped writing and raised his eyes to me over the edge of the clipboard. I heard him sigh as he lowered the clipboard.

"I thought someone had told you already," he said in a regretful tone.

"Told me what?" I asked, with a little bit of panic in my tone. I glanced around the room trying to read from anyone what was going on. Bella and my mom looked as confused as I did, but my dad had the same expression as the doctor.

"Edward, I'm sorry, I know football was a big part of your life, but you won't be able to play anymore."

I stared at him with wide eyes and my breathing picked up. "What do you mean, I can't play football?"

"You had to have a kidney removed. There was a lot of damage and I think it would be too risky to play football anymore. If you were hit in the wrong spot or strain anything you could risk losing your life. I don't think you'd get a miracle twice. In all honesty, you're very lucky to be standing here today without any more complications than you already have," he explained. I felt like the wind was knocked out of me after he finished. This was the worst news possible.

"Edward," I heard Bella say as she placed her hand on my shoulder. "Are you okay?" I didn't say anything or acknowledge her at all. All I could do was stare at the floor and wonder if this was some sort of a joke. Football was everything to me. I can't, not play anymore. I can't just give it up like it's not important.

Somehow we ended up in the car and on the ferry heading home but none of it registered in my mind. When we arrived home my dad helped me into the house. Everyone was there to greet me when I walked in, but I was still devastated from the news I had received, so I went straight upstairs to my room. I heard Bella follow me up, but I didn't want to talk to anyone at the moment so as soon as I was inside, I locked my door. I knew it was mean and I shouldn't have pushed her away, but I didn't want anyone telling me that it was going to be okay and it's not the end of the world. I just needed to be alone and needed to wrap my head around what this meant.

I lied down on my bed and stared up at the ceiling for a long time before I fell asleep.

I must have slept for a long time because when I woke up, it was dark outside and the house was completely silent. I opened my door slowly intending to go down stairs and find something to eat. I was starving and also very thirsty.

I was surprised by what I saw when I opened my door though. Bella was asleep on the floor next to my door. There was a blanket that was thrown across her that my mom likely put there. I kneeled down slowly next to her, brushing the hair out of her face. Looking down at her sleeping made me realize that not being able to play football was not the worst thing that could have happened to me. The worst thing would have been losing her. This was my sacrifice for her to live and for me to live. It was a small thing I had to give up and I was making it out to be something far worse than it was.

"Baby," I whispered. She hummed in response and turned her head slightly. "Come to bed with me." She slowly opened her eyes before rising to her feet, following me into the bedroom. She lied down on the bed next to me and looked at me with a worried expression.

"I'm so sorry, Edward. It's my fault," She cried.

"Bella, you had nothing to do with it. Don't blame yourself. It will be fine. I can still go to college and make something of myself. As much as I wanted football to be my career and make it to the NFL someday, it's very unlikely that it was ever going to happen. It's time I come to terms with that and figure out what it is I really want to do with my life. I'm sorry I locked you out," I said regrettably. "I shouldn't have done that and I promise I'll never shut you out of my life again."

"Yeah, you will," she enlightened. "But it's okay because I know eventually you'll always open the door. It's okay if you need time to yourself to think. I can respect that and when you figure things out, I'll always be here waiting for you to open the door for me."

I pulled her into my arms and nuzzled into her neck. "How did I get so lucky?"

"On the contrary, I think I'm the lucky one. Who else can say that their boyfriend would risk his life to save yours?" She asked.

"I guess not many. But it doesn't change anything. I'd still pull you out of the way to keep you safe even if I knew what it was I'd eventually have to give up," I said. "I think you're definitely worth it." I could hear her smile as she cuddled up next to me closer. We both fell fast asleep quickly and the fact that I was hungry and thirsty didn't bother me anymore. I just wanted to be here with her.

**BPOV**

Esme and I boarded a plane for Chicago two days after Edward returned home. Emmett had discovered that James' mother had ended up in Chicago and her name was Sue Clearwater now. She had married many years ago but never had any more children. Her husband died about five years ago from a heart attack. Esme thought that maybe we should call first, but she worried that if we called now, she would back out and not want to go through with it. So she decided that we should get to Chicago first then make the call. At least that way, we would already be in the area so there was no backing out. Esme was extremely nervous and we could all tell.

Edward was still very upset about what the doctor had told him and I could tell he was trying to hide it and make it seem like it wasn't a big deal or that it was worth it, but I knew it hurt him. I tried to back out once again thinking that Edward needed me here to help him. But he insisted that I go saying that his mom needed the support more than he did. He was probably right, but I felt like I needed to support Edward more than Esme.

He assured me that he was fine and was just going to be sitting in his room working on getting caught up on homework and trying to write his speech for graduation. It was going to be boring and there was no reason for me to stay. So I did what he wanted and went with his mom to Chicago.

We planned to stay with Edward's aunt and uncle and part of me was really excited about that, because I had heard so much about all of them and wanted to know all of Edward's family.

Esme sat next to me on the plane attempting to read a magazine, but her shaky hands and twitchy foot were not making it very easy for her. I had no idea what I could do to calm her down or make this easier for her. Esme and I had gotten closer over time but I was still nervous and uncomfortable around her at times, this being one of those times.

"Do you want anything to drink or maybe a snack?" She asked, nervously. I shook my head but she didn't pay attention, catching the attendant's attention asking for a bottle of water for me and some sort of alcoholic drink for her. I had no idea what it was, but she chugged it down wincing as she did.

"Esme, are you going to be okay?" I asked hesitantly.

"I'll be fine."

The rest of the trip she ordered drink after drink and by the time we got off the plane she was drunk. I had to help her into the cab and get her to Peter and Charlotte's house. Thankfully Edward had given me their address before we left. I was starting to wonder if maybe he knew this would happen.

The cab pulled up in front of the house and Peter came rushing out to help carry her in. He got her to her room and put her to bed thankfully. She was exhausted and needed the sleep, but here I was faced to introduce myself to these people that I didn't know, but would be staying with for the next couple days.

Charlotte had a scarf over her head and I assumed it was because of the cancer treatment Edward had told me she was receiving. I tried not to stare or say anything rude.

"You must be Bella," Charlotte greeted as she slowly walked across the room and brought me in to a hug. It was awkward hugging someone I had never met, but I tried to be kind. "Esme and Carlisle have told us so much about you. I feel like I already know you so well. I'm sure you don't know much about us though. I'm Charlotte and this is my husband Peter. I'm Carlisle's sister. We have three children named…"

"Benjamin, Sasha, and Carmen," I interrupted. "Edward has told me a lot about you as well. And it's really nice to finally meet you both. I can't wait to meet your children."

"Well, it looks like Carlisle was right when he told us you and Edward, are pretty serious. I heard he even took a bullet for you. That's quite amazing what my nephew did," she added. Just the thought of Edward made me smile, but at the same time it made me sad because I didn't know how he was doing back home.

"You must be exhausted after your trip. Why don't I show you to your room so you can get some sleep," Peter offered.

"Thank you," I said. I grabbed my bag and followed him upstairs to the room. He stopped just outside the door and pointed out the bathroom. He also informed me that I was sharing a room with Carmen so I needed to be quiet. I nodded my head and he showed me the rest of the way in pointing out the spare bed in her room. I fumbled through my bag for some pajamas and my cell phone.

Eventually after searching through my bag in the dark and not finding what I was looking for, I just picked it up and dragged the whole thing with me to the bathroom. I ended up dumping almost all the contents of my bag on the bathroom floor so I could find my cell phone. That was the most important thing to find at the moment.

When I finally found it, I called Edward. I knew he was probably anxiously waiting for my call. I wasn't surprised that he answered after the first ring.

"Hello, he said quickly. I smiled involuntary at the sound of his voice.

"I hope you are being good and not overdoing anything," I scolded, playfully.

"I'm actually lying in bed watching a movie, but I don't know what the movie's about since I've been obsessively staring at my phone every two seconds. I think it's almost dead," he laughed.

"Then I won't keep you long. I just wanted to let you know we made it and I really like your aunt and uncle," I stated.

"How's my mom?"

I stifled a laugh. "Well, I think she had about four or five drinks on the plane and now she's passed out in bed."

He laughed. "I thought that might happen. She doesn't like to fly and add that to the nerves of meeting this lady, I'm sure she was a mess."

"I hope she's better by tomorrow. We're supposed to find Sue and if Esme is up to meeting her we're going to call and see if she'd be willing to meet us. I hope she is. I don't want to find out we came all this way and I had to leave you again for nothing."

"You didn't leave me. You're just visiting family. You should feel honored that my mom asked you to go with her. I think that shows that my mom truly does like you and has some sense of comfort in your presence," he explained.

"I was sort of shocked she asked me to come, but I'm glad I can be here for her. I'd hate for her to have to come here by herself," I yawned.

"You sound tired. I'll let you go so you can get some sleep, but call me first thing in the morning okay?"

"I will. I love you," I said.

"Love you too. Goodnight."

"Goodnight," I said, before hanging up the phone.

I quickly dressed in some pajamas and crawled into bed.

The next morning I was awoken by a little girl sitting on my bed. I opened my eyes, staring at her for a minute before sitting up.

"Are you Edward's girlfriend?" She asked, with a sharp tone to her voice.

"Yeah," I weakly said. Her lips rose into a smile and she lunged at me wrapping her arms around my neck.

"I'm glad you're here. I really wanted to meet you. I'm Carmen."

"I was looking forward to meeting you, too," I said, returning the hug.

"Aunt Esme is downstairs. She asked me to check on you," she explained.

"Okay, I'll be down in a minute."

I quickly got dressed and went downstairs. Esme was sitting at the table drinking coffee and taking some Tylenol for her head. She looked horrible and I wondered if we were going to be able to pull this off with her looking that way.

I sat down next to her and watched her curiously.

"I'll be fine," she assured. "I just need a shower and lots of coffee."

After a few minutes, she went upstairs to get ready, so I introduced myself to the other two kids and sat with them watching cartoons until Esme was ready.

When she came down she did look a lot better and almost looked like her normal self. Thankfully we were taking a cab to the address we had because I don't think she was capable of being behind the wheel right now and there was no way I was going to drive here when I could barely drive back home.

Around eleven we finally left the house. Esme was fidgety and anxious. I decided to text Edward and find out if he could get his dad to call her to calm her down because I honestly had no idea what to do. He texted back almost immediately saying he had his dad on it and seconds later her phone began to ring.

I put in my headphones from my iPod to let them have some privacy and continued to text Edward, letting him know, how things were going and where we were. Once she got off the phone with Carlisle she did seem calmer, which I was thankful for.

"Esme, it's going to be okay. We can always back out," I said. She reached for my hand squeezing it and giving me a reassuring smile.

"I know. I don't want to back out though. I need to do this. I'm glad you're with me too. I couldn't do this alone and I think out of anyone you know what I'm going through."

I squeezed her hand in return, knowing she needed that support and I was glad I could be there for her.

We were silent for the rest of the trip until we pulled up in front of a small red brick house. We both stared at it for a minute and we both took simultaneous deep breaths. There was a park at the corner of the street so we asked the cab driver to drive us there and let us out.

When we got out, we sat down at a bench that had a perfect view of the house. We sat there for a long time not saying a word or making any indication that either of us was ready to face this lady if she was still there.

Esme had carried around guilt for years for not doing anything all those years ago when Bree was being abused and because of that James had grown up in a broken and dysfunctional home that caused him to be a cruel and demented man, who found pleasure out of hurting other people the same way he had been hurt. I had guilt for not doing anything to try and help him. Even though he hurt me tremendously in so many ways and probably scarred me for life, he was still the only father I ever knew and I wished there was a way I could have helped him and made his life easier. My counselor said that it was normal to feel that way, but it wasn't exactly healthy. I needed to let go of that guilt as well as the guilt of causing so many people I cared about pain and fear. But that was easier said than done.

Esme was here to try and make amends. I was here to try and make sense of everything that happened to me and my family.

"I have the number," Esme suddenly said. She turned towards me with the phone in her hand. "Should I call?" I glanced back at the house then back at her and nodded my head. She slowly punched in the numbers on her cell phone and with a large inhale of breath brought the phone to her ear. I waited for her to say something, but she never did. Her gaze was locked on something in the distance and she slowly dropped the phone to her lap, snapping it shut. I followed her eyes to a woman in the distance walking down the sidewalk with a bag of groceries in her arms. She looked to be in her late sixties with graying hair but some of her natural black hair color, still mixed in at places. She looked weathered, like she had lived a very hard and daunting life. After noticing the way Esme stared at her I knew that she had to be the Sue we came all this way to see.

"Should we go talk to her?" I asked. Esme never acknowledged my question. I saw her swallow hard and stand from the bench, walking across the street. I quickly stood to follow behind her.

Esme called out to her just as Sue reached her doorstep. She stopped and turned towards us, watching us come closer to her.

"Are you Sue Clearwater?" Esme asked, politely.

"Yes I am," she answered with a peculiar look on her face. "Who are you?"

"You probably don't remember me. Did you have a daughter named Bree and a son named James?" Esme asked. Sue dropped the bag of groceries to the ground and brought her hands to her mouth as she gasped and tears began to fill her eyes. "I'm Esme Cullen and this is Bella. I used to be Esme Platt. I was a friend of Bree's before she died. We'd really like a moment of your time to talk if you're available. I'm sorry that we just showed up like this, it's not normally like me to show up at someone's house unannounced, but we came all the way from Washington to find you. If now isn't a good time we can always come back or maybe meet some other place. I'm sorry we bothered you. We should probably go." Esme rambled on and on without letting her have a chance to respond or say a word. She turned around and started walking away.

"Wait," Sue called. Esme stopped, turning back around. "I remember you." Esme turned and began walking back towards her with a friendly smile on her face. "Bree used to talk about you all the time. Is this your daughter?" She asked, pointing towards me.

Esme turned to me and smiled. "Not by blood. But by fate she is." My heart swelled with acceptance and love from her. In that moment, I felt like Esme had finally accepted me into her family and into Edward's life.

"You're both welcome to come in, if you'd like," she offered. Sue picked up the grocery bag she had dropped and unlocked the door leading us into her home. It was a simple house with small knick-knacks all over the place. She also had two orange cats that were huge and very friendly. We sat down on the couch, waiting for her to put her groceries away. When she was done, she came in carrying a tray with three glasses of lemonade on it. We both took a glass, sipping at it, but not able to drink much because of the nerves.

"You said you wanted to talk to me?" she questioned, as she sat down across from us.

"Yes, we did," Esme answered nervously. "See, all those years ago when I was a kid, Bree confided in me and told me what was happening to her. She begged me not to say anything to anyone and I never did, thinking it was the right thing to do. Even after she…" Esme hesitated, "after she died. I didn't tell anyone, not even my husband. Until a few months ago, that is. I told my youngest son and it turned out he was in a similar situation that I wasn't aware of until later." She had a reminiscent smile cross her face for the slightest second. "He was stronger than I was and saved those kids who were being hurt. I should have been strong like him and spoke up when I could have to help you. I'm sorry that I wasn't strong enough."

"Esme, you have nothing to blame yourself for. I was the one that put my children in that situation and I did nothing about it. I could have spoken up too. I should have spoken up. But I didn't and because of that I lost both my children. I have suffered greatly and there isn't anything I can do to change that. You were just a little girl who had no control over anything. There wasn't one person out there that would have listened to you back then. They didn't do investigations for abuse back then like they do now. You can't blame yourself for this. I've come to terms with what happened and I've done my best to make penance by dedicating my life to helping other women and children who are in the same situation I was," she explained.

"Did you ever try and find James?" I asked before I thought better about it. She turned to me with a questioning look.

"I never stopped. After I was released from jail, I searched for years and years. But the evil man I left him with moved around a lot and it seemed like every time I'd get close they would disappear again. After I remarried, my husband was very supportive of my search and even hired private investigators to help. But as the years went on and we got older the search got harder and harder. I never stopped thinking about him. I wondered where he ended up, if he was happy or if he was ever able to get away from his father. I wondered if he went to college or if he got married. Those are still things I wish I could find answers too. He probably doesn't even remember who I am now," she said, looking away in the distance like she was saddened by not knowing.

"I do," I said, simply. She turned her head towards me quickly. "He was my step dad. He was mean to me and my brother and sister. He killed my mom." She let out a pained sigh and a tear slid down her face.

"Why are you here?" She questioned angrily. "You come in here and bring up the past that I have worked years and years to put behind me and then you tell me my son turned out to be just like his father. What do you want from me? I know I'm a horrible mother and should have never been allowed to have kids. I never had another child after what happened. I didn't hurt anyone else."

"Sue, that's not why we're here," Esme cut in. "We aren't here to blame you or make you feel bad for what happened. Believe me I think both of us have enough guilt that we would never put any of that on you."

"If anyone knows how you feel Sue, it's me," I said. "Even when I had someone who was willing to risk everything to help me get free from the abuse, I pushed him away and didn't want him to be involved. I would have done anything to keep my secret, but it ended up being the stupidest thing I ever did. I almost died and Esme's son Edward saved me. The whole Cullen family saved me and my brother and sister."

"He almost killed you?" She asked, with tears streaming down her face.

"He almost killed my son as well," Esme informed. "He was a severely disturbed man and that is not your fault in any way. You did what you had to do and there wasn't anything you could do back then or now to help him."

"Why did you come all the way here to tell me this then?" She asked.

"I guess we just wanted to meet you and I felt responsible for what happened all those years ago and I wanted to apologize for not doing anything," Esme said. "We also thought that you would want to know that your son is dead and he can't hurt anyone anymore."

"He's dead?" She cried.

"Like I said, he tried to kill Bella and both of my sons. My oldest, who is a cop, had no other choice."

"You also have grandchildren that we thought you may want to meet some day," I said. She shook her head and covered her face with her hands.

"I need some time to make sense of everything you've told me. I'd appreciate it, if you would both leave," she said in a sharp tone. Both Esme and I stood instantly and headed towards the door.

"I'm sorry if we upset you, it wasn't our intention. If you do want to meet your grandchildren, give me a call anytime," Esme offered, as she placed a business card on the small table by the door.

We drove back to the house in complete silence. I saw Esme wipe at her eyes a couple times, but I tried to pretend like I hadn't noticed.

When we got back, I went up to the room I was sharing with Carmen and called Edward.

"Hello," he said. I instantly broke down into tears at the sound of his voice. "Baby what's wrong?"

"It was horrible. At first, things seemed to be okay, but then once we explained how James was mean to us and that he tried to kill us, and he was dead, she got really upset and told us to leave," I sobbed. "I just want to go home. I should have never come here. I should have stayed with you."

"Do you want me to come there? I can leave right now and get on a plane. I'll be there in a few hours," he offered.

"No, I don't want you to do that. You can't fly or drive right now anyway. I'll be fine. We're leaving tomorrow morning, so I'll see you then," I said, trying to relax and dry my eyes.

"You know I'd come right now if you want me too," he promise.

"I know, but you can't. I'm not going to let you risk flying all the way here just so you can end up hurt again. I'll be home tomorrow."

"Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?" He asked.

"Just distract me. Tell me about your day and everything that happened the last few days."

"Well, not much of anything happened. I did homework, slept, ate, and played some video games with Jasper and Emmett. Even my dad played a game with us," He laughed. "Rosalie attempted to make us dinner last night, but it ended up being a disaster so my dad ordered a pizza instead. She's not that great at cooking or anything domestic. I told her she should get some pointers from you and she glared at me. Other than that, there really hasn't been much going on."

"Have you been taking your medicine?"

"Yes, Bella," he laughed. "I've been getting lots of rest and not overdoing anything. I'm fine. I'm more worried about you right now."

I sighed. "I'll be okay. I just can't wait to be home with you."

"I'll ride to the airport with my dad tomorrow to pick you up, okay?" He suggested.

"I'd like that. I should probably go though. I need to go check on Esme and make sure she's okay."

"Alright," he said. "I love you."

"I love you, too," I said with a smile on my face. Those simple words from him, made everything better.

I went downstairs and saw Esme talking with Charlotte in the kitchen so I decided to go outside where the kids were playing. I didn't want to disturb their talk and I really needed the fresh air anyway.

I watched them for a while playing and being silly and imagining what it would have been like if Seth and Leah could have had that type of life. They never got to be happy and carefree growing up. I wondered how that would impact there lives as they got older. We'd all been through so much and just because James couldn't hurt us anymore, didn't mean the pain and suffering, was gone. There was still so much we were all dealing with and would continue to deal with for the rest of our life.

"Bella, will you push me?" Benjamin asked.

I smiled and walked towards him on the tire swing. "Sure," I agreed. After a while Sasha got on as well and they both giggled and squealed with excitement as I pushed them higher and higher. It wore me out and eventually I had to sit down and relax.

They were both balls of energy and never stopped running and playing. I didn't know where they got all that energy, but I was glad they were allowed to use it and run freely.

Carmen came over and sat next to me giving me a peculiar look. "Are you going to marry Edward?" She asked suddenly.

"What," I asked, surprised by her question.

"I want you to marry my cousin."

"Carmen, I'm only eighteen. We have to go to college and figure out what we're going to do with our lives before we even discuss marriage. I don't think that has even crossed either of our minds."

"Well, when you do, can I be in it?" She begged. I laughed, realizing where this was going.

"Sure," I agreed. "If Edward and I ever get married, then you can be part of the wedding party. But you never know. Edward may end up marrying someone else someday."

"No, he won't. I'll make sure he marries you. I like you," she said with a big smile.

"Thanks Carmen." It was the first time I ever thought about marriage with Edward. I knew I wanted to be with him forever and I would never love anyone the way I loved him, but I didn't know about marriage. The thought kind of scared me. My mom got married and that man ended up killing her. Not that I ever thought Edward would do anything like that. But the thought of being married terrified me. Could I be married and make someone happy? Could I be happy being married? Was Edward who I wanted to spend the rest of my life with? Would we still love each other in five years, or ten years, even twenty years from now?

Those thoughts filled my mind for the rest of the night. At dinner none of us said much and I went straight to bed afterwards.

I dreamt of Edward that night. I pictured him as an old man with gray hair and wrinkly skin. I almost didn't recognize him. But when he smiled and his green eyes twinkled, I was sure it was him. He reached for my hand, and I noticed it was wrinkled and aged just like his was. He kissed the back of my hand gently and even though we were both older in my dream, I was still completely in love with him. Nothing could ever take that away or change that.

The next morning, Esme and I got up early to pack all our stuff and head home. It was a quick trip, but we did what we came to do so we needed to go home. I was glad too. I wanted to see Edward.

We said goodbye to everyone and gave all of them hugs. They planned to come out to Washington in a few weeks to see Edward graduate so it wasn't going to be long before we saw all of them again.

Once the plane took off, I sighed in relief knowing that in just a few short hours I would see him again. I didn't plan to tell him about the dream I had or anyone for that matter. It was silly and just my imagination playing games with me. I decided that thinking about Edward's and my future, was ridiculous. I had no idea where we would end up or what might happen years from now so there was no reason to dwell on it. I'd just take one day at a time and enjoy every minute I got to spend with him.

"Thank you for coming with me," Esme said.

"Thank you for wanting me to come with you. I'm sorry things didn't turn out better with Sue."

"It went about as well as I imagined it would. She needs time to adjust to what we told her and how best to deal with it. It's why I didn't want Seth or Leah to come now. It would be too overwhelming and probably cause more damage than good. When she's ready, she'll let us know," she explained. "Did this trip help you at all?"

"I think so. It made me realize that I'm not the only one who takes on the blame for everything that happened. But it also made me realize that no one is really at fault. Everyone just does the best they can to survive. Just like Charlotte. Even though she could be angry and want to blame so many things for the cancer she's suffering from, she doesn't seem to. She seems happy and full of life. She doesn't let any of that keep her down. And that's how I want to live. I don't want to keep living in the past and wonder what I should have done differently or what I could have done to make things better. I just want to look forward and take care of my family and love all of you as much as I can. I'm very lucky to have the people I have in my life. I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for all of you and I need to accept that and believe that everything that's happened was for the best." She wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

"I'm glad you're part of our family. You have got to be the one thing that has made all of our lives better, especially my sons. I couldn't be happier that he's found you to love. I know I was indifferent about it at first, but that was only because I was an overbearing, worrier and didn't want my son to get hurt. But I should have seen how much you both love each other and been happy for you. He looks at you the same way Carlisle did when we first started to date. He's so much like his father in so many ways." She smiled like she was remembering something from the past.

"Thank you," I said simply. Her attention came back on me and she smiled sweetly, squeezing my shoulder.

For the rest of the flight Esme slept. I suspected that she had taken something to help her sleep since she didn't like to fly. I read and focused on catching up on homework since finals were coming up and I really wanted to graduate. I had missed so much school since meeting Edward and I didn't want that to get in the way of graduating.

When we landed, I woke Emse up and we started our way out of the plane. My stomach had butterflies in anticipation of seeing Edward. As we stepped out and I caught a glimpse of the top of his head, I smiled and took off running towards him. He saw me running through the crowd and I could tell if he could he would have been running also. Instead he walked briskly, holding his side.

As much as I tried to be gentle and not slam into him, I couldn't help it. He let out a guttural sound when our bodies collided and I instantly felt bad and wanted to pull away, but he wrapped his arms around me, holding me tightly to him.

"I'm glad your home," he whispered.

"Me too," I murmured against his chest.

"Doesn't your mother get a welcome home hug?" Esme asked from behind us. He pulled away from me, laughing lightly as he gave his mom a hug as well. Carlisle was standing next to her holding our bags. Edward offered to help, but he said he wouldn't allow it considering Edward was still recovering.

We drove back listening to Esme and Carlisle talk about the trip and how Charlotte was doing and about their trip here for Edward's graduation. Edward and I sat in the back of the car relatively quiet. He had me tucked into his side with an arm wrapped around my shoulders and his chin resting on the top of my head. I think I dozed off for a while because before I knew it we were already driving back through Forks.

When Carlisle pulled into the driveway of my house everyone came running out, wanting to know how the trip was and if we had fun. It wasn't fun in any way, but it was a good trip. It was funny how something so simple could make such a big impact on my life.

"Did she come back with you? Do we get to meet her?" Seth asked, excitedly.

"Not yet Seth," Esme said. "She needs time to figure out what she wants to do. We did sort of spring a lot of information on her."

"Is she nice? What was she like?" Leah asked.

"She was really nice," I informed. "She had two huge orange cats and she gave us some homemade lemonade. If she ever comes to visit, I think everyone will like her."

When Esme and Carlisle got back in the car to head home a few minutes later, I expected Edward to leave with them and I'd have to say goodbye again. But instead he grabbed a backpack out of the trunk and told his parent's goodbye.

"I hope its okay that I stay?" He asked. I turned towards Kate who just smiled and nodded her head.

"You know you are always welcome here Edward," she said. "No need to ask permission."

We all headed back in the house. "Are you hungry? Kate asked. "Garrett should be here soon and we were thinking of going out to dinner."

"I'm actually, really tired. I'm thinking I'll just go to sleep and get ready to go back to school tomorrow."

"Alright," she said. "What about you Edward?"

"No thanks. I'm going to spend some time with Bella."

We walked up stairs to my room, shutting the door behind us. I changed into some comfortable clothes and crawled up on the bed where Edward's protective arms were waiting for me. He pulled me close to him and wrapped me up in a blanket.

"Did you get your speech done?" I asked, drowsily. He groaned and I took that as a no.

"I don't know what I'm supposed to say," he admitted.

"I'm sure you'll think of something," I encouraged.

"I hope so. Maybe with you back home, I can focus more on that and not worry about you being upset." I felt a sadness come over me at his words.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have called you and burdened you with all my problems."

"Don't ever say that. If you're upset I want you to talk to me and tell me everything, even if it's not the greatest topic. I don't ever want you to keep anything from me," he begged.

"Okay," I said through my sleepiness.

"Get some sleep Bella. We can talk more when you wake up."

"I dreamt of you while I was gone," I revealed.

"You did?" He chuckled. I nodded my head slowly against his chest. "What was your dream about?"

"Nothing important," I whispered, as my eyes closed. I felt him kiss the top of my head and whisper that he loved me just as I fell asleep.


	26. Chapter 25

**A/N: So I'd like to start off by thanking everyone for all the reviews and PM's. I truly appreciate all the love and support everyone has** **shown me and my story. I'm a little sad because I only have one more chapter to write and then epi, but at the same time I'm excited to start my newest stories. Thank you all so much for sticking with this story and sharing it with others. Being that this was my first story, I was blown away by the amount of people who actually read it and enjoyed it. I still find it terrifying every time I post a new chapter because I feel such a huge resposibility to please all of you. But I think most everyone enjoys what I've written so far, at least I hope. I haven't gotten any really bad comments on it so I guess that's a good thing. Anyway thanks so much to all of you for helping me find a new passion that I never knew existed inside of me and enjoy doing.**

**Questions: One question I had was why was Sue in jail for Bree's murder when it was her husband who had done it: The answer is because back then they didn't do investigations on child abuse like they do now. Sue was told to admit to the murder by her husband so she did because she was afraid of him. The police took that as the truth with nothing more to it and put her in jail. Then James and his father took off. James was beaten most of his childhood, until he took a stand and killed his own father. Because of all the abuse, mentally and physically, he had suffered, it screwed him up severely. He had control issues and got enjoyment from seeing others suffer. When he would lose control he handled that by killing whoever it was. He lost control of Victoria so he killed her. He lost control of Renee so he killed her. He lost control of Bella and had planned to kill her, but Edward got to her before he could. So being a man obsessed with control, he stalked Bella and Edward for months trying to find his way to get to them without getting caught. He wanted revenge and wanted control back. After he was arrested in Florida, he became even more obsessed with getting to Bella and Edward, so he knew exactly what he needed to say and do to get the judge to let him off on bail. He knew he only had a short window of time to get to them so in desperation he got a gun and went to find them. Edward mentioning Bree was the only thing that held him off and got him to rethink what he was doing. But in the end he was so far gone mentally that it was too late and he knew that. Bella truly did want to help him. Which is also something who has been beaten most of her life would want to do. She may have hated him and wanted him to suffer as much as he made her, but she also had so much sympathy and compassion for him considering he was the only father she ever knew and that he was human being who didn't deserve to be hurt like she had. But Edward was more important to her so she tried to save him when there was no hope for James.**

**Another thing, James didn't meet Renee in Arizona. That is where he lived with Victoria before she had her accident (which was actually James killing her and making it look like an accident), and then he moved to Forks with his daughter Leah. He met Renee in Forks.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters involved.**

* * *

**Lost Without You: Delta Goodrem and Darren Hayes**

I know I can be a little stubborn sometimes  
You might say a little righteous and too proud  
I just want to find a way to compromise  
Cos I believe that we can work things out

I thought I had all the answers never giving in  
But baby since you've gone I admit that I was wrong

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie  
How am I going to be strong without you I need you by my side  
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye don't know what I'd do ...I'm  
lost without you  
I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you  
I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you

How am I ever gonna get rid of these blues  
Baby I'm so lonely all the time  
Everywhere I go I get so confused  
You're the only thing that's on my mind

Oh my beds so cold at night and I miss you more each day  
Only you can make it right no I'm not too proud to say

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie  
How am I going to be strong without you I need you by my side  
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye don't know what I'd do ...I'm  
lost without you  
I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you  
I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you

If I could only hold you now and make the pain just go away  
Can't stop the tears from running down my face  
Oh

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie  
How am I going to be strong without you I need you by my side  
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye don't know what I'd do ...I'm  
lost without you  
I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you  
I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you

**EPOV**

The closer we got to graduation, the more anxiety I started to have. I was supposed to give a speech, and I had no idea what to say. My bedroom floor was covered with crumpled up papers. My computer had at least a dozen documents opened with random starts to the speech, but I'd always abandon them after a little while and start over.

This should have been easy. I had given plenty of speeches and class presentations in the past. Why was this so hard now? I tried going the typical route of singling out a few specific teachers who had changed my life. But that didn't sound right, because there really wasn't a teacher that I admired more than another. I tried the "this is the first day of the rest of our lives" approach, but I didn't understand exactly what that meant. How could this be the first day of the rest of our lives? I'd already lived through some pretty traumatic and life changing experiences. I didn't know how anything in the future could be worse or better. I attempted to write about what my plans were after high school, but the more I thought about it, I didn't know what my plans were. Football was out, I didn't want to be a doctor like my dad, even though both my parent's dreamed of me becoming one. A year ago, Emmett probably would have loved it if I became a police officer like him, but now I'm pretty sure he would have pushed me as far away from the profession as possible.

No matter what topic I tried to write about, nothing seemed right. I was thoroughly frustrated and almost considered just buying a speech off the internet and call it good. But then I would think better of that thought and realize what a cop-out that would be. Did I really want to go down in Forks High history as the idiot who bought a fucking speech online?

It didn't help much that everyone in town was calling me a hero and practically looking at me like I was some sort of saint. When in reality, I didn't think I was a hero at all, I didn't do anything special. I was a nobody, just trying to do the right thing. I didn't do anything except cause a lot of confusion for everyone, myself included.

Everyone was expecting something meaningful from my speech and I had nothing. I read numerous speeches from previous classes and watched tons of YouTube videos with graduation speeches trying to find some sort of inspiration to write my own. But still there was nothing.

My parent's tried to help, so did Emmett and Jasper, even Rose tried to add her two cents, but she just made me mad and pushed my buttons. I had blown up at her twice in the last week for trying to "help". I think she finally got the point and left me alone.

Since I was so focused on this speech I had barely spent any time with Bella, which frustrated me even more. She was going through a lot right now and she needed support or someone to talk to, but I wasn't a very easy person to talk to at the moment. She tried to be understanding and give me space to focus, but I could tell she was worried about my sanity. Even I was.

One afternoon, I was up in my room yet again trying to write this speech and feeling the pressure since graduation was in less than a week. I could hear my mom downstairs laughing and talking with Kate and Bella. Rosalie quite possibly could have been down there as well. I had no fucking idea and didn't care either way. Their laughing was getting on my nerves and I was at the point where I was ready to go downstairs and tell them all to shut the fuck up or get out of the house. Instead, I put my headphones on and turned my music up as loud as possible to drown them out. I was sort of hoping maybe if the right song came on I would get some inspiration from that. But everything I was listening to was either angry and loud, or depressing. But it did make my nerves calmer and less tense.

I leaned back in my chair and clasped my hands behind my head, closing my eyes, attempting to relax. I started to think how nice a shot of tequila or vodka would feel right now to help me calm my nerves, but unfortunately since I was still recovering from my gunshot wound and on some pretty strong pain medication, alcohol was out of the question.

I sat there with my eyes closed and leaning back in my chair as far as I possibly could, trying not to think. That was until I felt someone touch my shoulder. I shot up in the chair almost falling over from the shock of someone in my room bugging me. "What the Fuck?" I shouted as my eyes opened. My eyes fell on Bella standing there with a frightened expression on her face.

"I'm sorry," she timidly said. "I just wanted to check on you and see if you wanted me to bring you anything."

I huffed running my hands through my hair. "I'm fine. I don't need anything," I said sharply.

"Okay," she whispered as she turned to leave my room.

"Bella, I'm sorry. I'm just on edge because of this speech. I don't know what I'm supposed to write."

"I know you're struggling. That's why I've been trying to give you space."

"I just don't want to get up there on stage and have nothing to say. Everyone is expecting so much, which is putting unnecessary pressure on me."

"Is there anything I can do to help?" She asked.

I sighed heavily and turned back towards my computer, trying to focus once again. "No," I said. I heard her inch her way over to me and hesitantly place her hands on my shoulders. She slowly started to give me a massage, and as much as I wanted to enjoy her touch, it just made me tenser.

"Bella, can you please stop?" I begged, shrugging my shoulders from her. She pulled her hands away quickly, apologizing when she did. "I need to concentrate and I can't handle people touching me right now. If you want to be up here then find something to do." She sat down on my bed, thumbing through a magazine. Every time she would flip a page, I would cringe and clench my teeth. Lately everything was getting on my nerves.

"Have you thought about writing about looking towards the future and learning to grow as we get older?" She asked.

I rolled my eyes. "I'm sure Angela's speech is going to be about living for the future. I can't say the same thing she does. She's valedictorian, she has that honor. My speech needs to be meaningful or informative. I don't know what it's supposed to be."

"Edward, you need to relax. You're going to aggravate something or make yourself sick. I don't want you to end up back in the hospital," she warned.

"I'll be fine."

"I'm just trying to help," she remarked. I let it go, not replying or acknowledging her. I went back to staring at the blank document open on my computer screen. I typed out an opening sentence; looked at it for a minute then backspaced, erasing the entire thing. I groaned pulling at my hair for the hundredth time in the last hour, I'm sure. I had a feeling I was going to be bald before I even got to graduate.

"What if you talk about football or your coach? That was important to you in high school and I think it would be a good reference," she suggested a few minutes later.

"Why would I talk about football when it's meaningless anymore? Football can never be part of my life again. That part of my life is over," I said, angrily.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled, looking regretful. "I wish there was something I could do to give that back to you. I wish I could have taken your place."

"Yeah, well you can't. We can't go back and change the past so, whatever, I'm stuck with what I was given," I said harshly.

"I guess that means you regret getting involved with me then, huh?" she asked, pausing for a minute to see if I would respond. I didn't say anything. At that moment I didn't really know what to say. "Maybe it would have been better if I had never confided in you or trusted you in the first place. Maybe all this time when I was trying to convince myself that I could trust you, I should have been keeping my guard up. Maybe you would have preferred that I didn't beg you to fight and let you die so then you didn't have to live this life you're stuck with. I'm sorry I ruined your life. I knew it would only be a matter of time before you decided I wasn't worth it. You don't have to take care of me anymore out of obligation. So I'll leave you alone and we can go our separate ways now." She stood up quickly and stormed out of the room, leaving the door swinging in her haste.

I hesitated for a few seconds, but those seconds were enough to do the damage. When I realized what I had done, I chased after her, yelling her name as I flew down the stairs. I reached the front door just as she backed out of the driveway in her truck. I slumped onto the front steps, my face falling into my hands. I didn't know what was wrong with me. It wasn't her fault that I couldn't play football. Just because she brought it up didn't mean I should have been so harsh towards her. She was just trying to help and I was being an ass towards her. It wasn't that I was stuck with her or that I didn't want this life. I was glad I was still alive and she's the only reason I was still here. I owed her everything and I had been trying to convince myself for weeks now that giving up football was worth it. I still had her and that was enough.

"Um, Edward," Kate motioned hesitantly from behind me. "Where did Bella take off to?"

"I don't know. I guess she went home."

"She doesn't have her license yet. I was giving her a driving lesson in the truck. I'm sort of stuck here now," she informed. "Did you two have a fight?"

"I don't know," I admitted. I stood up and stormed off towards my room. My mom gaped at me in disbelief as I ran past her.

I sat on the edge of my bed, staring at my wall, trying to make sense of what I had done, for a couple hours or maybe it was only a few minutes, I didn't really know. I just made one of the biggest mistakes I had ever made. I didn't know how I was supposed to fix this. But I didn't have time to fix this. I needed to write a fucking speech.

After a while, there was a light knock on my door and my dad stepped in. I groaned dramatically, knowing I was in for some sort of lecture or something. He sat down in the chair across from me.

"Your mom said you and Bella had a fight," he stated.

"It wasn't really a fight. Or maybe it was. I don't really know what happened. I'm just stressed about this speech and trying to figure out where I'm going to go from here I can't write this speech when I have no idea where my future is going. I don't know what I want to do with my life. How am I supposed to write a meaningful speech when I feel completely lost right now? I keep wondering if I did the right thing all those months ago. I made tons of mistakes, I know that, but I keep questioning if I should have gotten involved in the first place? I wonder how my life would be different if I had never known what was going on. But then I feel guilty for even having those thoughts," I admitted. "Anyway, I took out my frustration on her and she stormed off and now I don't know what to do or what I want." I blurted more than I intended, but once I started I couldn't stop.

"Edward, do you remember when you were younger and you used to get so upset when one of your teammates wasn't that great at football and your team would lose because of it?" He asked. I nodded my head, vaguely remembering what he was talking about. "I used to tell you that you were once that boy until you found your niche, and to be a good leader you needed to help those kids find their niche. You needed to be kind to them, even when everyone else was mad and upset they lost the game. They needed some encouragement and compassion to build their self-confidence, so they could actually believe they could be better. I remember you working with one teammate in particular for hours, trying to help him and make him enjoy playing football and even though at times I saw you get frustrated and want to give up, you kept at it and tried to keep your emotions in check. That little boy you bonded over football with ended up being your best friend and he still is to this day." I remembered exactly what he was talking about now. That's how Jasper and I became friends. "You did the same thing with Bella. You saw that she needed help and you took charge and did the right thing. You built up her confidence, you made her believe in herself again and you bonded with her in a way no other person could. You fell in love with her. Did you make mistakes? Absolutely," he laughed. "Will you make more? I'm sure of it. But that's what life is all about. Making choices, making mistakes, learning from those mistakes, and doing the right thing," he enlightened. "I wish your mother and I would have realized that years ago and gave you boys more opportunities to make your own choices and mistakes in life instead of always protecting you and guiding you on the path we wanted for you." He smirked. "But I guess that was our mistake and something we learned from."

"What am I supposed to do about Bella and about the speech?" I asked.

"Just do the right thing, son. You know what that is." He stood up patted me on the arm and headed out the door. I had no idea what he meant. My parents had always made my choices for me. They always told me the right thing to do. Now I was left hanging with no better understanding of what I was supposed to do. Why did my parents choose now, to all of a sudden give me all this freedom to make my own choices?

The only thing that made sense to me at that moment was I needed to apologize to Bella. I didn't want her to run off or think I didn't want her anymore. Losing her would be detrimental. I needed her. The speech would just have to wait. Even if I got up there on stage and just winged it, Bella was more important. I couldn't go another minute with her thinking I was upset with her or that I wish I never knew her. She _was_ worth everything. She was my everything. Nothing else mattered. Without her, I truly would be lost.

So I did the only thing I could think of and grabbed my keys off my desk and ran down the stairs, rushing out to my car. But when I stepped outside and saw that my car was gone, I panicked. I slammed the front door and stomped off to the dining room. My parents were having dinner with Emmett and Rose.

"Hey Edward, are you hungry?" my mom asked. "I was going to bring you up a plate later, but since…"

"Where the fuck is my car?" I cut her off. Her eyes shot to mine in shock.

"Edward, you don't talk like that in this house," my dad reprimanded.

"What did you do with my car?" I shouted again.

"I let Kate borrow it," my mom said timidly. "I didn't think you would be using it tonight and she needed a way to get home. We can go get it first thing in the morning."

I rolled my eyes and sighed heavily. "Don't bother. I'll walk." I turned on my heel, walking back outside. It was already getting dark and I only got a few hundred feet when it started to rain and I realized I should have grabbed a coat. But I didn't want to go back to the house. So I kept walking.

It took me well over an hour to walk to her house which in normal circumstances should have only taken me twenty minutes, but I couldn't exactly run like I would have preferred and I had to walk slower than usual because of my injury.

By the time I arrived at Bella's house, I was soaking wet. I pounded on the door repeatedly until Garrett finally answered.

"I need to talk to Bella," I demanded.

"Edward, you need to go home and get some rest. She doesn't want to see you right now and I think it would be best if both of you had a little space for a while," he suggested.

"Garrett, you aren't her fucking father, so stop acting like you are and go get her."

"She's not even here."

"Well, where the hell is she?" I questioned.

"She went out with Alice. I don't expect her home until late tonight. So, go home and get some sleep, then you can talk to her tomorrow," he suggested. "Since you're here, take your car so you don't have to walk in this rain." He held out my keys to me and with a heavy sigh I took them. My shoulders slumped as I walked towards my car in the driveway. I opened the door and got in, starting it up and driving away. I contemplated going to find her. Most likely she was just over at Alice's house. But knowing Alice, she'd be even more protective of Bella than Garrett was.

There was only one option. I slammed on the brakes, pulling to the side of the road and parked my car. I jumped out into the heavy downpour again and walked the few hundred yards back to her house. When I reached her house, I sneaked around to the back and looked up at her room. I didn't know if it was such a good idea to climb the tree so soon after my injury, but I wasn't going to give up so easily. I slowly grabbed the limb and pulled myself up. The pain ripped through me instantly, but I was already up, so I kept going. Limb after limb I climbed until I was at her window. The only thing I kept thinking was that once I got up there her window was going to be locked. But I just told myself that I would sit on the window ledge until she got home if I had to. I'd probably end up with hypothermia or something, but I didn't care. I wasn't leaving until I could apologize.

Thankfully, when I reached her window, it opened easily, so I slipped in as quietly as possible and sat down at the edge of her bed. I should have thought better of that since I was sopping wet, but it was too late now. I put my head in my hands, hunched over as the guilt and pain I was feeling rushed over me. I was such a jerk to her. I didn't deserve her. I was no better than James by making her feel like my misery was her fault. She deserved better and I wanted to be better for her. Why was I always screwing everything up with her?

I sat there for most of the night trying to decide what to say to her to make her forgive me, but I didn't know how to say what I wanted to say. There was so much I wanted to tell her. So much I needed to say to her. I needed her to understand how important she was to me. How much I needed her. I wanted her to know that what I wanted in life more than anything wasn't football, it was her. Football meant nothing without her. She was irreplaceable.

My head jerked upwards when the door finally did open, letting in a small amount of light from the hallway, illuminating her figure for the briefest moment before she shut the door. She stood there in the dark, gazing in my direction. I couldn't make out her eyes, so I didn't exactly know if she was looking at me or not. I wanted to rush to her and wrap my arms around her, but I wasn't sure if she would allow me to so I remained unmoving on the edge of the bed.

After a few minutes, she slowly walked across the room, closing the distance between us. My breathing picked up and my heart beat started to race. If I didn't say this right, I could lose her forever. When she was close enough for me to reach out and touch, I knew she was waiting for me to say something, but everything I had planned to say was lost. All I could do was continually, say how sorry I was. Within seconds, she had her arms around my head, pulling me to her. My head rested against her stomach and I wrapped my arms around her waist, pulling her to me.

"I'm sorry, Bella. I shouldn't be taking out my frustration on you. I didn't mean it. You know I don't blame you for anything. I'm sorry. So sorry," I cried.

She ran her fingers through the hair at the back of my neck shushing me. It wasn't supposed to be this way. I was supposed to be comforting her after everything she'd been through and everything I'd done. But instead she was comforting me. She kneeled down in front of me and ran her fingers across my face and brushed my still damp hair back off my forehead. I looked deep in her eyes trying to read her expression in the dark.

"It's okay Edward. I know you didn't mean it. I know you're going through a lot right now. I don't blame you for what you said. I know I ruined your future, and I'm sorry for that. I wish so bad I could go back and prevent you from ever getting involved. You would be so much better off with…"

"Stop," I demanded, interrupting her. "Don't ever say that. I wouldn't be better off without you. You're everything to me. I would be miserable without you. You didn't ruin my future. You only made it worthwhile. You are my future, Bella. I don't need football or college or a direction in life. I don't even need a kidney. All I need is you." I could see the tears welling up in her eyes as they glistened in the small amount of light coming in the window from the street lights.

"Do you really think of me as your future?" She asked through her tears. I brushed her tears away with my thumbs.

"Yes, I do," I declared. "There isn't anything more important to me than you. I love you and I always will." I pressed my lips to hers, kissing her softly.

"Why are you all wet?" She inquired when our kiss broke.

"Because I walked here," I answered.

"Edward, you're going to get pneumonia," she scolded.

"I don't care. I needed to see you. I'm just glad your window was open. I was planning to sit on the ledge to wait for you if I had to," I confessed.

"You climbed the tree?" She asked in a shocked tone.

"Garrett wouldn't let me in, so I had no other choice."

"Edward, did you not listen to the doctor? You have to take it easy. Walking all the way over here in the rain and I assume with no coat either since you aren't wearing one, then climbing a tree, is not taking it easy," she reprimanded. I just smiled, before leaning in to kiss her again, passionately. I didn't want to break the kiss. I didn't want to lose our connection. But seconds after deepening the kiss, she pulled away.

"We need to get you out of these wet clothes before you get sick," she suggested, as she tugged on my shirt pulling it up over my head. I watched as her eyes scanned across my chest and stop at the scar on my side. Her fingers raked down my chest and stomach, gently touching the wound with her fingertips. She leaned down, leaving small kisses all across the scar. Her sweet little kisses felt amazing and for some reason that small gesture relaxed me more than anything else had for weeks.

I closed my eyes, relishing in her touch, and wanting nothing more than to be with her tonight. I lied back on the bed as she removed my shoes and wet socks before tugging on my jeans and removing them as well.

She stood up, leaning over me as her lips roamed across my exposed chest. When she reached my neck, nibbling on the sensitive skin, I sat up slightly taking her face in my hands and kissing her lips fully with intense need and desperation.

"Bella," I said breathlessly, between kisses. "Make love to me."

"It's not safe, Edward," she said grinding her hips farther into me. I pulled away to look into her face seriously.

"I just walked all the way here in the rain and climbed a tree. I'm still alive. I think I'll be okay. We'll just take it slow." My lips found hers again and I pulled on her bottom lip gently with my teeth. She moaned as her fingernails scraped across my back. I lifted her shirt off of her, my hands scanning over her body, knowing every groove and bump, precisely. I reached around removing her bra never once breaking our kiss to do so. Her bra slid down her arms and fell to the floor next to my wet clothing. I quickly unbuttoned her jeans and clumsily she kicked them off doing the best she could to be careful not to hurt me in the process. As soon as she was completely naked for me, I grabbed her hips and pulled her further up on the bed. She straddled my hips, leaving trails of wet kisses down my neck and chest.

I arched my hips teasing her opening wanting so desperately to be inside her. She sat up, gazing down at me with trepidation. I knew she was second guessing if she should be doing this or not. But I didn't care if it hurt of caused further damage. I needed her and I was not going to let her change her mind out of fear of hurting me. I sat up wrapping my fingers around the back of her head, pulling her to my lips roughly. I had never kissed her so forcefully since we had been together and I think it took her off guard at first, but within seconds she melted into my form returning the urgency. She shifted her hips slightly, giving me perfect access to her slit. I could feel the heat radiating off of her and I ached to be inside of her.

With one swift thrust, I pushed my way in. She let out a ragged moan, clenching around me. I watched as she bit down on her bottom lip, trying to prevent from making too much noise. My mouth covered hers in a passionate kiss, knowing it was the only way to prevent either of us from being too loud. She rocked her hips against mine slowly. As much as I enjoyed the slow pace, I knew I wasn't going to last long since it had been so long since we'd had sex. I needed to speed things up so she would enjoy this too. I grabbed her hips and in one swift move I laid her down on the bed. I grabbed her legs lifting them up over my shoulders, pounding into her once again. She had to put her hand over her mouth to cover her scream. I froze for a brief second worried that maybe I had hurt her.

"Are you okay?" I asked, frightened. She nodded her head quickly, removing her hand from her mouth, grabbing my face with her hands and bringing me down to her lips.

"Please Edward, don't stop," she begged, breathlessly. I slowly began sliding in and out of her, speeding up as time went on. I was losing my battle with control quickly. I needed her to come.

"Bella… please… I'm not going to last…" I stuttered, wanting her to come before I did.

"Deeper," she whispered. I steadied myself over her, lifting her hips slightly and slid into her hitting a spot I don't think I had ever hit before. Within seconds her eyes rolled back and her mouth fell open. Her finger nails dug into my back and she started trembling. Watching her fall into a state of pure ecstasy was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. It only took a few seconds more before I fell over the edge and came inside of her. Her legs fell to her sides lazily as I still lay in between her legs. We remained wrapped around each other, breathing heavily, coming down from the high we were both feeling. I didn't want to pull out of her. I didn't want to lose this feeling. She was so perfect and we fit together so easily. She was my other half and nothing mattered as long as we were together.

I gazed down at her, watching her, as a beautiful smile spread across her lips, making me smile in return. She stretched her arms out and moaned softly. "Thank you for that," she said. I chuckled, leaning down and kissing her lips sweetly.

"You're more than welcome love," I said. "But in all honesty, I think I should be thanking you. I have been balled up in knots for the past couple weeks and now I feel completely at ease." I leaned down kissing her again, longer and deeper. She wrapped her arms around my neck, pulling me on top of her. I was worried about smothering her but she didn't seem to care. Our kiss felt endless and I really don't know how long it lasted. It reminded me of the first time I made love to her when we spent the entire night afterwards kissing.

Eventually I did pull out of her and break our kiss. I really did feel like I would smother her if I was pressed against her for too long. I lied on my back and Bella instinctively curled up into my side, resting her head against my chest with her hand resting on my stomach and leg draped across my hip. My arm wrapped around her shoulders protectively as my other hand clasped over hers. She fell asleep almost instantly and for the first time in days, I slept. I didn't have a care in the world at that moment. All that mattered was her and nothing was ever going to change that.

A few hours after I fell asleep, I woke suddenly having some sort of an epiphany as to what I should write my speech about. I didn't want to lose my train of thought, so I slowly slipped out from underneath Bella and put on my boxers. I sat down at her desk, searching for a piece of paper and a pen. I turned on her lamp, hoping that it wouldn't be too bright that it would wake her, but was pleasantly surprised that the light was very dim and only let off enough light to see what I was doing.

I scribbled the words down on the paper and was amazed at how quick the words came once I finally had my thoughts in order. I wrote for about an hour, not noticing anything else. I didn't even know Bella climb out of bed until I felt her come up behind me, wrapping her arms around my shoulders. She leaned down and kissed me on the cheek. I reached up patting her hand and rubbing her arm that rested against my still bare chest.

"Did I wake you?" I wondered.

"No," she said softly. "What are you doing?"

"Writing my speech," I confessed. I turned my head to look at her with a satisfied smile. I leaned over giving her a quick kiss on the lips. "Thanks for being my inspiration."

Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion at my words, but a pleased smile came across her face. "Do I get to read it?" I shook my head.

"You'll have to wait to hear it at graduation like everyone else. So, no peeking," I warned. She scoffed at my words making me laugh. "Come on, baby. Let's go back to bed." I flipped off the light, grabbing her hand, leading her back to bed. We curled up next to each other once again and fell into a deep sleep, not waking until late the next morning.

We were almost late for graduation rehearsal because of it, but thankfully, Kate knocked on the door and woke us in just enough time to throw some clothes on and head over to the school. I was glad that over the months I had occasionally left clothes here and Bella was so kind to wash them and store them in her drawer for me. We would have been late if we had to stop back at my house for fresh clothes and I definitely didn't want to wear my damp clothes from last night.

I grabbed my speech and keys off the desk and we both rushed down stairs. Since my car was parked a few blocks away we took her truck, making it to the parking lot of the school with minutes to spare.

We ran across the football field to the crowd of our fellow classmates and teachers hand in hand and almost everyone had a look of relief on their faces as we reached the group.

We were handed our cap and gown, neatly folded in clear plastic bags as our names were checked off the list. We rushed to our seats as most everyone else was already seated. The principal talked for a minute, giving us instructions as to the sequence of events and how the ceremony would go. I was seated in the front row along with Angela and a few other students who had important roles in the ceremony. I looked back scanning the crowd for Bella, but from where I was seated I couldn't find her. Undoubtedly because her last name started with an 'S', so she was towards the back. I did notice Alice who waved to me with a huge grin on her face. She was practically bouncing in her seat with excitement. I smiled and shook my head at her before turning around to listen to the instructions again. We spent most of the morning practicing how to walk in and walk across the stage and listened to a few teachers give us a little pep talk. It was actually quite boring and I just wanted to get out of here.

When it was finally over everyone cheered and started to disperse. I pushed through the crowd trying to find Bella and when I finally did spot her, my panic arose when I saw she was with Jessica. I rushed to her side wrapping my arm around her waist protectively.

"Hi Edward," Jessica said sweetly.

"Jessica," I responded sharply. Bella wrapped her arms around my waist and leaned against my shoulder.

"Like I was telling Bella, I just wanted to apologize for the way I behaved. I know I should have been more sympathetic and not made up the rumors about Bella and James. I should have come to terms with the fact that we were over and you were never going to look at me the way you do her. I was just jealous and hurt that you loved her more than you ever loved me. Or maybe you never did love me. I do know that you wouldn't have taken a bullet for me." She laughed nervously. "Anyway, I just wanted to say how sorry I was and to wish you both the best of luck." She started to walk away.

"Jessica," Bella called out. "Thank you. And good luck to you too." She smiled and nodded her head before walking away. I looked down at Bella realizing how incredibly beautiful and forgiving she really was.

I kissed her on the forehead. "Do you have any idea how much I love you?" I asked.

"I sure hope it's as much as I love you," she replied with a smile. I laughed.

"That's not even possible." I leaned down kissing her fully. Our kiss was interrupted suddenly by a shrill shriek as Alice jumped on us.

"Can you believe it? We're finally done," she exclaimed, jumping up and down. We both laughed at her joy.

"It's going to be really different now with all of us going our separate ways," I said.

"We'll keep in touch. I'm sure Bella and I will talk every day. Maybe you and Bella can come to New York and visit us," Alice suggested. "That would be so fun."

"It would. We'll definitely have to plan that," Bella agreed, just as Jasper came up behind Alice, wrapping his arms around her waist and swinging her around. She squealed before he put her down and kissed her.

"Hey Edward… Bella," Jasper greeted, as he pulled away, from the kiss with Alice. "Are you planning to go to the party tonight?"

I glanced at Bella's face and smirked. "I don't think so Jazz. I'm not much up for a party and I need to edit my speech a little, so I'm ready for Friday."

"Alright, well if you change your mind it would be great to see both of you there," he further persuaded.

"Not tonight Jazz," I said again. A few classmates were throwing a huge graduation party and everyone was planning to be there. But after recent events, I wasn't much up for partying anymore. "I'll be right back. I need to go talk to the principal about my speech." I kissed Bella on the forehead releasing her from my arms, as she continued to talk to Alice and Jasper.

I walked over to where all the teachers and staff were standing.

"Mr. Cullen," Mr. Greene greeted as I walked towards him. "I was hoping I'd get a chance to talk to you. I hope you have been doing well."

"I'm great Mr. Greene," I said with a smile.

"That's good. I wanted to let you know that if giving a speech at graduation is putting unnecessary pressure on you, I am perfectly fine if you want to decline. Your health and well-being is more important than you giving a speech," he informed.

"Actually, Mr. Greene I wanted to come and let you know I finished my speech and I wanted to have you look at it for your approval." I pulled the folded up piece of paper from my pocket and handed it to him. He put his glasses on, unfolded the paper and glanced over it. I saw his lips rise up into a smile a couple of times. I figured that was probably a good thing. "It's still a rough draft. I wrote it late last night so I need to go over it a couple more times and fix a few things," I explained.

His head rose as he folded up the paper, handing it back to me. "This is perfect Edward. You did an excellent job," he said.

"Thank you, sir," I said, feeling very pleased that he approved.

I walked back over to Bella asking if she was ready to go. We said goodbye to Alice and Jasper who were also leaving. We climbed into her truck and headed down the road. She was really quiet during the drive, so I reached out my hand for hers, linking our fingers together. "Is everything okay?" I asked. She nodded her head.

"It's just so strange. I never thought in a million years I'd be where I am now. I have everything I always dreamed of having and now it's about to all end," she said with a far-off look on her face. I pulled her hand to my lips kissing her knuckles.

"It's just the beginning baby. We have a whole lifetime for more dreams and wishes that we will make come true together." She smiled, sliding across the seat to rest her head on my shoulder.

"Do you want to go get some breakfast?" I asked. She laughed.

"You do realize it's almost two in the afternoon right?" She questioned.

"The diner will serve us anything we want. And right now a big hearty meal sounds really good. I haven't eaten much in days. You can order whatever you want, but I want some breakfast," I explained.

"Actually, breakfast sounds really good." I drove across town, pulling into the parking lot of the diner. We walked in and chose a booth by the window. Both of us ordered a stack of pancakes with bacon and juice. I was starving and my stomach was growling from just the smells alone.

"Do you want to do anything tonight?" I asked. "If you want to go to that party we can. I'm just not feeling up for a party right now, but I'll go if you want." I could tell something was bothering her and I couldn't figure it out.

"No, I don't want to go to the party. I just want to spend some time with you," she informed.

"Bella, what's wrong?" I asked pointedly.

"Nothing," she said. I raised an eyebrow at her knowing she was lying. She sighed knowing she wasn't going to get away with it. "I've just been thinking about my mom a lot lately. I saw her in my dream and I just wish she was here to see me graduate and having the life she always wanted for me. She used to talk about me graduating when I was little and doing something great with my life. She was so sure I was destined for greatness." She laughed at the memory. "I just wish I knew what it was I was supposed to do. I want to be great for her, but I don't know how."

"Bella, do you not realize how great you already are? Do you not see how many lives you have changed just by being you? I honestly think your mom would be so proud of you right now," I said. "I know I am. And I can't wait until I get to have more things to be proud of you for. You are destined for greatness and I'm so glad you will allow me to be a part of that." She smiled, looking so much more confident in herself after what I said. "Do you feel lost? Like you aren't sure where you're supposed to go from here. You don't know what you want to do with your life?" I questioned. Her eyes shot to mine, nodding her head slowly. I reached for her hands across the table, taking them in mine. "Me either. But we'll figure it out together." She smiled looking to relax a little, just as our food arrived.

We ate our food, talking about nothing in particular, but enjoying each other's company. When we were done, we went back to my house and I packed up some of my stuff so I could spend a few nights with her. I grabbed my laptop because even though my speech was pretty much done, there were a few things I wanted to look up just so I could make it better.

The next few days, I spent critiquing my speech and doing research for it. We were supposed to be done with school, but this seemed like the biggest assignment I had ever done. But in the end, I was really proud of it.

Peter, Charlotte and the kids showed up the day before the graduation ceremony. We had a big family dinner at some place in Seattle to celebrate. Bella came along and it was weird watching her at a table with all of my family, being able to talk so freely and having a good time. It was like this is where she belonged. She was part of this family and we weren't complete until she came along. I wasn't complete until she came along.

The night before graduation I stayed at Bella's house, giving my bedroom up willingly to family members. We lay in bed side by side staring into each other's eyes. I traced the scar from the bullet, on her side with my finger. "Do you realize that not only do we have matching tattoos but we also have matching scars?" I asked, smirking. She laughed lightly.

"It is strange how much our lives have intertwined with the other. If you would have asked me a year ago if I thought this was where I'd end up, I would have told you that you were crazy," she remarked.

"I am crazy. Crazy about you," I whispered, grabbing her hip and pulling her closer to me. She smiled placing her hand on my cheek and kissing me softly. We talked a little longer into the night about graduation. She was really pushing to know what my speech was about and as much I wanted to tell her, I also wanted her to hear it for the first time when everyone else did. Eventually exhaustion came over the both of us and we fell asleep.

The next morning we slept in before getting up and preparing for the day. I headed back to my house, so I could get dressed and practice my speech. I asked Carmen to be my audience and it was so funny watching her listen to me because she probably had no idea what half of it meant. But she listened intently and smiled while I read it.

"That was perfect," she said. I laughed.

"I don't know if it's perfect, but thank you anyway," I returned. I looked down at the papers reading over my words silently again.

"So guess what?" Carmen questioned.

My attention went back on her. "What?"

"When Bella was in Chicago with Aunt Esme, she said I could be in your wedding," she informed.

I was taken aback by her words. "Who said Bella and I were getting married?" I questioned.

"I did. I like her and I want you to marry her. I want to be a bridesmaid and Bella said I could," she further explained.

I was shocked by her admittance and didn't really know what to think of it. Why were Bella and Carmen discussing marriage? I wanted to know what exactly Bella said, but I didn't know how to approach the subject without making it sound like I was upset about it. I asked Carmen to promise me she would keep this little bit of information to herself and not discuss it with anyone else. Knowing my parents, if they heard what Carmen just told me, they would freak and probably try to forbid me from seeing Bella. It's not like I hadn't thought about marriage with her, but it wasn't something I thought about extensively or planned on doing any time soon.

My mind drifted to the thought throughout the day, which made it hard for me to focus on what was coming up later that night. I think everyone in the house could tell I was tense or something was heavy on my mind, but no one ever asked. They most likely assumed I was worried about the ceremony, which I was, but Carmen's words were stressing me out more.

By the time we got to the high school, there was already a fairly large crowd of people filling the stands. Thankfully it turned out to be a nice day, at least nice for Forks. There was no rain, which meant we could have the ceremony on the football field and not in the cramped gym. I headed over to the group of my fellow classmates to line up. I spotted Bella standing with Alice so I walked over to her, taking her hand in mine. She squeezed my hand in return, turning her attention on me.

"There's Jasper," Alice said, waving her arms frantically, trying to get his attention, before dashing off towards him.

"Hi," she said, leaning up to give me a quick kiss.

"Can I ask you something?" I questioned. Her expression changed from elation to concern in a matter of seconds at my words. I tried to smile, but I knew she could read my face pretty well and she knew something was up. "Did you tell Carmen that she could be a bridesmaid in our wedding?" Her eyes widened as she gasped. Her cheeks started to pink from embarrassment.

"I didn't tell her that exactly. It was just a silly little girl thing. Most girls at that age have a fantasy about weddings and getting married. She asked me if she could be a part of our wedding. It actually surprised me that she asked me that. I tried to explain to her that we weren't getting married and quite possibly never would, but she insisted that we were, so I told her that if it ever happened, she could be. I'm sorry. I didn't think she would say anything to you. I didn't mean to make you think that…" I interrupted her by kissing her lips.

When our kiss broke I smirked at her. "You didn't make me think of anything I hadn't already thought about myself." She looked at me astonished. "I wasn't worried about it. Just curious what exactly got you two on that subject?"

"Edward, Bella, line up," Ms. Cope demanded. I sighed giving her one last quick kiss before walking away. I heard her call out "good luck" as I walked towards my place in line.

As the ceremony started, I didn't focus much on what was happening. I knew there were people on the stage talking and saying a few words about the graduating class, but none of it registered. That was until I heard my name and everyone started clapping. I looked around, realizing that it was time for me to give my speech. I stood, walking the short distance to the stage and took my place in front of the podium. My speech lay out in front of me. I glanced down at it then out at the audience before taking a quick deep breath so I could start.

"Staff, families, friends, and fellow classmates," I began. "I have to admit, writing this speech was difficult for me. As much as I'd like to stand here today and give you some great words of wisdom; I don't think I am accomplished enough of a person to do so. I was asked to give this speech because many of you look at me as some sort of a hero, because I helped someone in need and risked my life to save them. However, that's not true. I didn't do anything out of the ordinary. I just did what was right.

Recently, my dad reminded me of a something that happened when I was a child and how I became friends with Jasper, who has been my best friend for most of my life. He also reminded me of something he always used to say to me and my brother while we were growing up. "Do the right thing." It was something I heard from him most of my life. He always wanted me to do the right thing while I do my best and make him proud. But I never really understood what he meant by any of these words. I always did the right thing; I always did my homework, I always practiced, and I always strived for the best I could be in all aspects of my life. I never quite understood those words until I was faced with making a choice to do the right thing or turn my back and pretend like it was none of my business. I admit, the latter would have been easier. Therefore, that was what I originally planned to do. But consciously, I couldn't do that. So I chose to do the right thing. Even though it was risky and I knew my life would forever be changed because of it; it was the right thing to do. As time went on, I started to question whether what I had done was right after all. It seemed like every time I thought I was right, I was actually wrong.

Up until a few days ago, I still questioned if I had done the right thing or not. I tried to imagine how different my life would have been if I had chosen to ignore the situation. But in the end, if I had chosen a different path, I wouldn't be where I am today. As anyone trying to make sense of the path I choose for myself, I did a Google search of the quote my dad raised me to follow and came across a similar quote by Peter F. Drucker. It says "Doing the right thing is more important than doing the thing right." I didn't do everything right; actually, I think I probably did everything wrong, but I did do it for the right reasons. The right thing was taking notice when someone was in need and doing everything I could to help them, when no one else would. That was such a small thing for me to do and at times seemed pointless to even try, but I didn't give up and I never turned my back on them. That was what was most important.

The only words of wisdom for my fellow classmates and distinguished guests I can give today is to do the right thing, even when it seems impossible or pointless. What matters most, is knowing that you tried to do the right thing, even if you end up failing.

As I did my Google search, I came across some other quotes which I thought were relevant and might help some of you on your path of discovery, so I thought I'd share them with you today.

The first…"The power of one man or one woman doing the right thing for the right reason, and at the right time, is the greatest influence in our society," by Jack Kemp. Which in my circumstance, I would not be standing in front of you today had I not done the right thing and influenced our community. I never expected that what I did would have such an impact on everyone here.

The second came from a line in a movie called "Now and Then". I've never seen the movie, but I liked the quote." A few people laughed when I said that. "Things will happen in your life that you can't stop, but that's no reason to shut out the world. There's a purpose for the good and for the bad." As some of you know, I did have something bad happen to me because of the path I chose. As upset as I was about the news and as much as I wanted to blame someone for what happened, I realize now everything happens for a reason and it only means I'm able to make a new path and find a new passion.

The next is by Janos Arany. 'In dreams and in love there are no impossibilities.' I wholeheartedly believe in this quote. I wouldn't be where I am if I hadn't found love in the process of doing the right thing. Even though it's been difficult and at times felt impossible, it always worked out somehow. Our dreams and our love will forever be intertwined and not one thing could change that." I looked out scanning the crowd in front of me, looking for her. When my eyes found her sitting towards the back, she was fidgeting with her hands trying to hold back the tears I was sure were threatening to fall. I could barely make out the flush of her cheeks, but I knew she was blushing. She looked up when I paused and our eyes connected. We both smiled and in that moment everyone else in the stadium disappeared. All I saw was her. She was my future, my hope, my strength, my love. I'd be lost without her. I could never love another the way I love her. So with Carmen's words still fresh in my mind and feeling even more in love with the girl who was staring back at me with such love and admiration, I blurted the only thing that made sense. "Bella, will you marry me?"

I heard everyone in the audience gasp at the same time, which quickly brought me out of my trance. I stuttered for a minute, trying to understand what just happened and what I said or what I was doing. I didn't know where I left off in my speech. I didn't think I could even talk if I did. I started to feel light headed and beads of sweat began to form on my face. I felt a hand come up on my shoulder and someone handed me a glass of water. I drank it down quickly trying to find some composure to finish.

"I'd like to share one last quote that I hope will mean the same for you as it did for me. It's by Louisa May Alcott. "Life is my college. May I graduate well, and earn some honors." In this last year, I have learned a lot about myself and about life in general. The things I've experienced are nothing I could ever learn in a book. Living life to the fullest and taking risks is what you learn from. So live life, and do it well. You never know how much time you have left to do all the things you want to do.

In conclusion, I'd like to congratulate the graduating class and my fellow classmates on making it this far. I wish you all the best on your journey of life and I hope you will always remember to do the right thing. Thank you," I finished. Everyone applauded as I rushed back to my seat.

The rest of the ceremony was a blur. I couldn't stop thinking about what I said and why I said it. I had thought about marrying her, but I didn't plan on it being anytime soon. Was it really what I wanted? Would she want it? I knew my parents were probably flipping out about what I said. They would try to convince me and probably Bella that it was a bad idea and we should wait. But I loved her and I didn't want to wait anymore. I had done enough waiting for things in my life and I didn't see why it mattered if I married her now or later. This was my choice and if she was willing, I was going to marry her.

After we were all called to the stage to receive our diplomas and the principal said his last little bit, everyone threw their hats in the air. I didn't though. I sat there still trying to decide exactly what I was going to say to Bella.

Family and friends began filling the field congratulating their children and taking pictures. I knew any minute my family was going to bombard me with questions, but I had to find Bella first. I shoved through the crowd of people searching for her, but every direction I turned someone was pulling me aside wanting to know if I was serious or wanting to congratulate me or tell me how much they enjoyed my speech. I wanted everyone to leave me alone.

When I finally spotted her with her family, she looked scared. She was shaking her head profusely. Her eyes were closed and her cheeks were stained with tears. The regret I felt was unbearable. I needed to make her understand. It didn't matter to me if we got married now or years from now. All I wanted was her.

I rushed to her side leaning down to look at her. She gasped once she realized I was there. "Bella…" I began.

"Edward, what did you do?" Emmett asked, coming up behind me with the rest of my family right behind him.

"No," my mom said forcefully, crossing her arms in front of her.

"Edward, you aren't thinking rationally," my dad said. "Give it a few years then you can discuss marriage."

"I agree," Kate added. "You need to go to college first, and then if you still want to get married we'll be more than willing to support this decision."

Alice and Jasper came running over. Alice began screaming with excitement. "Oh my God, Bella, I can't believe you and Edward are getting married. I want to help plan the wedding. You have to do it before I leave. I have to be here."

"Why is your little brother proposing to his girlfriend before you did yours?" Rosalie asked of Emmett angrily.

"See what you did man?" Emmett asked, frustrated.

None of them made any sense. I didn't understand why this had anything to do with any of them. This was me and Bella, no one else. I could tell she was thinking the same thing by the way she ignored everyone around us and stared into my eyes, searching for some sort of answer to everything.

"Edward, are you even listening?" My mom shouted.

"Will all of you just shut up," I yelled. Many other groups of people standing nearby turned to see what the commotion was. "This has nothing to do with any of you. This is our life and our decision. None of you have any say in this." I huffed, grabbing Bella's hand and pulling her along with me. She followed willingly and that alone gave me hope that I hadn't screwed everything up yet.

I rushed us across the parking lot straight to my car. I pulled out quickly not sure where I planned to go but knowing that we needed to be alone. We needed to go somewhere so we could talk this out and figure out what it was we both wanted. Or more realistically, what she wanted. I wanted whatever she wanted.

I drove down the highway, both of us completely silent until I figured out exactly where I wanted to take her. I pulled onto the gravel road, bringing us deeper into the trees until we ended up in the exact spot I took her that first day.

I parked the car and stared out in front of me trying to find the words.

"Do you remember this place? I asked.

"It's the place you took me that first day you talked to me. The day my life changed," she answered, with a small smile.

We sat quietly, wondering what to do next.

"Did you mean it?" She asked. I turned to her quickly.

"Did I mean it when I asked you to marry me?" I questioned. She nodded her head. "I wouldn't have said it if I didn't mean it. I know it was sort of unexpected and it's not exactly how I planned to do things, but I meant it." She sucked in a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Look, Bella, if you don't want to or you aren't ready, I'm okay with that. I only want what you want. We can wait as long as you want. I just know that I love you and I'll never love anyone as much as I love you. You are the only one I want and whether we marry now or later doesn't matter, as long as we do it eventually. You don't even have to say anything now. Just let me know that you're okay and not freaked out by this."

Bella spoke before I could even get all the words out. It was as if she hadn't heard a word I said. "Yes."


	27. Chapter 26

**A/N: A few quick things. **

**First: caritochaves tweeted me a link for a youtube playlist that she put together, with all the songs from this story. I was so amazed that she took the time to put that together for my story, so I wanted to share it with everyone. The link for it is on my profile. Thank you again for doing that. I did cry. **

**Second: This story was nominated for a Faithful Shipper award in the 'fic that made you cry' category so thank you all for nominating and voting. It's such an honor to be in the same category as some of the other stories and authors on the list.**

**Third: This is the last chapter of this story. I will be writing an epi for it in the next few days so that should be up soon. I'm a little sad that it's ending, but at the same time very excited because I've never finished a multi chapter story in my life. I start them, then abandon them, so I wanted to thank all of you for all the wonderful reviews and PM's because those are what gave me the modivation to keep going and finish the story for all of you.**

**Fouth: Now that this story is about finished, I am working on my next story called "Don't Give Up On Me" which I have already posted the first chapter of, if anyone wants to check it out. I'm also planning to continue one of my oneshots I wrote called "Happenstance". I wasn't planning to, but an idea popped into my head and my mind has been running wild with it, so I'll be adding on. I don't think it will be a very long story, but we'll see what happens.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters involved.**

* * *

**Here I Am: Bryan Adams**

Here I am - this is me

There's no where else on earth I'd rather be

Here I am - it's just me and you

Tonight we make our dreams come true

It's a new world - it's a new start

It's alive with the beating of young hearts

It's a new day - it's a new plan

I've been waiting for you

Here I am

Here we are - we've just begun

And after all this time - our time has come

Ya here we are - still goin' strong

Right here in the place where we belong

It's a new world - it's a new start

It's alive with the beating of young hearts

It's a new day - it's a new plan

I've been waiting for you

Here I am

Here I am - this is me

There's no where else on earth I'd rather be

Here I am - it's just me and you

Tonight we make our dreams come true

It's a new world - it's a new start

It's alive with the beating of young hearts

It's a new day - it's a new plan

I've been waiting for you

It's a new world - it's a new start

It's alive with the beating of young hearts

It's a new day - it's a new plan

I've been waiting for you

Here I am

Here I am - next to you

And suddenly the world is all brand new

Here I am - where I'm gonna stay

Now there's nothin standin in our way

Here I am

Here I am - this is me

**BPOV**

The minute I saw Edward's face when he arrived at the graduation ceremony, I knew there was something bothering him. I had no idea it was going to be about what Carmen and I discussed back in Chicago. Honestly, I sort of forgot about that entire conversation we had, up until Edward confronted me about it. I was shocked and didn't exactly know what to say to him. Edward and I never discussed marriage or spending our lives together and it really wasn't that important to me anyway. I just knew that I would follow him to where ever he wanted me to go; as long as he wanted me to. All I wanted was to be with him. It didn't matter if we were married or if we never married.

He shocked me again when he said it was something he had thought about. He thought about us getting married? I never would have imagined he had thought about it and it made me even more nervous. Not because I wouldn't marry him or I didn't want to, but because it was a frightening thing to imagine. We haven't even been together a whole year yet. We had some pretty serious, life altering things happen to us. We seemed to get in arguments over stupid stuff all the time. I imagined once we started college, things would be even more stressful and we'd probably get on each other's nerves more than once a day. Would he really love me a year from now, or even five or ten years? I can't marry him just because it sounds right in the moment.

As the graduation ceremony started, I kept thinking about what he said and wondered if he was serious. But when he started his speech and I saw him standing up on the podium, looking almost nervous, it made me realize I was stressing over nothing. It wasn't like he was asking me to marry him. He just said he'd thought about it. That could mean anything. It didn't mean we were going to get married or that he ever planned to marry me. I needed to just let it go and listen to what he had to say.

His words brought me to tears. At first I was mortified, because I knew everyone in that stadium and on that field knew he was talking about my situation. But then I realized he was only speaking the truth and wanted everyone to know he wasn't perfect and wasn't a hero. He was just Edward, doing something selfless for someone in need. I had never thought about it much before, but what he had done, from the very beginning, was the most thoughtful thing anyone has ever done for me. He was a hero and would always be my hero. We both may have made a lot of mistakes along the way, but in the end we would always work things out and I'd always love him more as each day passed. Nothing in life was ever perfect and it probably never would be, but what mattered most is that no matter what, we worked it out and learned from it.

When he paused briefly after he talked about our dreams and love being intertwined, I looked up, wondering why he stopped. I smiled, hoping he wasn't worried that I was upset about his speech. I didn't want him to think I was upset. I was completely stunned when the words "Bella, will you marry me" left his lips. I felt the air leave my lungs and everything around me became blurry. I knew people around me were staring and probably wondering if I was going to answer right here. But I had no way of answering. I couldn't talk, let alone move.

The rest of the graduation was a blur. I didn't know what to say or what I was supposed to do. I didn't even know if he was serious. Maybe he didn't mean to say it. Maybe it was just an impulse. He seemed flustered after he said it, so he probably surprised himself by saying it. It was obviously not something he planned to say.

When graduation was over and my family came rushing over to me, I didn't know what to expect. Leah and Seth hugged me excitedly and were jumping up and down. But Kate asked them to stand to the side for a minute so she could talk to me privately. They moved away a short distance, but they were both still within earshot so they knew what was going on. Kate and Garrett stood in front of me with a concerned expression on their faces.

"Did you know he was going to do this?" Kate questioned harshly. I shook my head.

"Bella, you can't marry him. You both are way too young and you need to think this through," she continued. I closed my eyes trying to focus on what was happening. I didn't want to talk to them about this.

"Kate, maybe we should back off and let her make her own decisions," Garrett said.

"This isn't about you Garrett. You have no say in what happens in any of their lives," Kate scolded.

"And neither do you," he returned angrily. "She's an adult now Kate. She can make her own decisions."

I shook my head, squeezing my eyes shut as tightly as I could, trying to make it all go away. I didn't want them fighting because of me. I didn't want anyone to be upset or mad at me. If he was serious and I said yes, both his family and mine were going to be upset. If I said no, Edward would be upset and think I didn't love him. I didn't know what to do.

I felt Edward reach out his hand to me as he said my name. I gasped, looking up at him, so scared of what I should say or do. I didn't know what he expected.

As his family began to surround us and give their two cents of the situation, it only made my anxiety worse. Everyone around us was angry. I stared into his eyes, pleading with him to give me some sort of answer to what was going on. I didn't want to be here and have to face this.

When Edward finally told all of them to shut up, I couldn't be happier. It worried me at first because I didn't know how they were going to react to him shouting like that, but before I had a chance to see what happened next, he was pulling me off the football field and towards his car. He didn't say anything as we got in and drove away. I didn't know what he was thinking or what he wanted me to say, so I kept quiet.

I was pleasantly surprised when he brought me back to the place where everything began. He asked me if I remembered this place and I thought that was pretty silly of him to ask. Of course I remembered this place. How could I forget?

"Did you mean it?" I asked, timidly.

"Did I mean it when I asked you to marry me?" he wondered. I nodded my head waiting for him to respond. "I wouldn't have said it if I didn't mean it. I know it was sort of unexpected and it's not exactly how I planned to do things, but I meant it." I wasn't sure what I thought he would say, but it wasn't that. "Look, Bella, if you don't want to or you aren't ready, I'm okay with that. I only want what you want. We can wait as long as you want. I just know that I love you and I'll never love anyone as much as I love you. You are the only one I want and whether we marry now or later doesn't matter, as long as we do it eventually. You don't even have to say anything now. Just let me know that you're okay and not freaked out by this."

I didn't even hear the last part of what he said. All that registered in my mind was that he was serious. He wanted to marry me. I had such a strong sense of fear come over me. I wanted to tell him no. I wanted to tell him that I wasn't ready. But then I thought about it for a minute and wondered why I wasn't ready. I loved him. Even if we argued at times, nothing ever changed between us. He was the only one I felt like I could ever argue with, but still know that no matter what I said to hurt him he would still always love me. He always wanted my trust and I wanted to give it to him. I wanted to give him my complete devotion. So I put all of my faith and trust in him and said yes.

"Yes?" He questioned. His expression telling me he didn't know what I was saying yes about.

"Yes, Edward, I'll marry you. If you still want to, anyway," I clarified. He breathed a sigh of relief as a smile spread across his lips.

"You looked freaked out back at school. I was sure you were going to say no. Not that it would have mattered if you did, but I was scared that maybe I made you second guess being with me all together. You looked like you were crying and you had your eyes shut so tight. I didn't know what to think," he rambled.

"Edward your speech made me cry. But they were happy tears. And afterwards, Kate and Garrett started questioning me and then they started to argue, which scared me. Then your family came over and sounded just as upset as Kate did. I didn't want everyone being mad at me," I explained.

"So if you're scared of making our families upset, why are you saying yes?" He questioned.

"Because I trust you and I know in my heart this is right." I laughed a little remembering his speech. "We may not be doing it the right way, but we're doing it for the right reasons." He smiled, leaning over the seat and tangling his fingers in my hair as he pulled me closer to him to kiss me fully.

"Are you sure? Honestly sure, this is what you want?" He asked seriously. I laughed at his expression of concern yet elation.

"Yes, Edward I'm sure. I don't care what anyone says. This is our life and if we want to get married then we have a right to. You are my future too and I know we'll make it through anything. If we can make it through what we already have, we can make it through so much more," I enlightened.

"We can, and we will," he smirked. "I did this all wrong though. I was supposed to have a ring and get down on one knee. I screwed this up really bad didn't I?" I shook my head.

"You didn't screw anything up. You just did it your way. It's how you do everything," I said.

We sat in silence for a few minutes, both of us coming to terms with what this meant and where we go from here.

"So," he began, nervously after a while. "Whose family do we want to talk to first?" I sighed heavily knowing that eventually we would have to face the outside world and talk to everyone about this.

"Maybe we should get it over with all at the same time. But I think we need to discuss the details first," I suggested.

"Like what?"

"Like when, for instance," I said.

"Well, what do you want?"

"I don't know. But I did promise Carmen she could be a part of it, so we'll have to be sure they can be here at least. And Alice wants us to have it before they leave for New York. But I guess they could always fly back if we planned it for a future date. We also need to think about us going to college and making those arrangements."

"So, let's do it now," he suggested. "They're already here. I wouldn't want them to have to come back later on this summer. Alice and Jasper will still be here, so let's just do it."

"Are you saying today?" I asked, shocked.

"No," he laughed. "I'm thinking in a couple days. I know that's not a lot of time, but I'm sure everyone can throw something together quickly. I wouldn't want anyone there besides family and close friends anyway so it doesn't have to be huge."

"Edward, are you serious? You want to get married now?"

"Why not? It makes sense to do it now while everyone is still here. Why does it matter if we do it now or later? It's going to happen regardless, so let's just do it so then we can focus on getting ready to head to school."

He made a lot of sense and it wouldn't matter whether we did it now or not. "Okay," I agreed. "Let's do it now."

"Are you sure? I don't want you to agree to anything that you don't want."

"Edward, we're getting married in four days. Now let's go tell our family," I ordered. He groaned, knowing what we were going to have to face. But he started the car and headed out anyway. I sent a text message to Kate telling her to meet us at The Cullen's house and right away she sent back a text asking where we were and what was going on. I didn't respond. I turned off the phone and hoped that she would listen and meet us there.

When we pulled up in front of the house, all the cars were there. As we stepped out of the car, I could hear all the kids in the backyard playing. I was glad they were out back. I didn't want them around if this got out of hand.

Edward walked around to my side, taking my hand in his and raising it to his lips, kissing the back of my hand gently for encouragement. "Are you sure? This is your last chance to back out," he said.

"No, I'm not backing out. I love you Edward and I want to spend my life with you."

He smiled sweetly, leaning down to kiss me before we headed into what was undoubtedly the scariest thing we ever had to do. We both took a cleansing breath as we stepped on the porch and opened the door. He held on to my hand tightly, as we walked into the living room to face our family.

They all stared at us, with different expressions. Some were questioning, some were curious, some were angry. It made me extremely anxious and I found myself almost cowering behind Edward.

"Before anyone says anything, I think we should try to listen and see this from all sides before we make any rash decisions," Carlisle suggested. "Edward, Bella, why don't you sit down so we can discuss this." Edward guided us over to the couch. I sat as close to him as I could, knowing that no matter what he'd protect me.

"I guess we should probably leave the room," Charlotte suggested to Peter. He looked upset that she was telling him to leave. I think he wanted to see what happened.

"We should too, Rose," Emmett said.

"Are you kidding me? I want to see how this unfolds," she informed.

"Rose," Emmett said, harshly. She huffed, rolling her eyes, leaving the room with him.

"Well, I guess I should leave too since I don't have any say in what happens right?" Garrett said angrily. I didn't want him to leave. He may not have been my dad or even an uncle, but he was probably the only one who would see things from our side.

"Garrett, I want you to stay," I announced. He stopped in his tracks, looking at me hesitantly before he sat back down on the couch. Kate eyed me curiously.

"I just want to know where you both went after graduation," Kate asked.

"We went somewhere that I go to think. We needed to talk and figure things out before we came here," Edward said.

"And what is it that you figured out?" Esme asked.

Edward sighed, knowing that his mom was going to be the hardest person to sell on our plans. "We're getting married." He paused, taking in everyone's expression before he continued. "…This weekend."

"What," everyone shouted. Edward recoiled next to me.

"You can't be serious. How can you even think about getting married so quickly?" Carlisle shouted.

"Edward, I'm not allowing this. You aren't thinking rationally," Esme added. "This is a huge mistake and you'll both end up regretting it." Edward and I sat quietly, with our heads hung low, listening to everything they said.

"Bella, what are you thinking?" Kate questioned, harshly. I could feel the tears building up inside of my eyes, threatening to stream down my face any minute.

"Why don't we let them explain themselves, instead of attacking them for their decisions," Garrett suggested. This was why I wanted him to stay.

"Why does it matter when we get married?" Edward shouted. "We're going to college together. We're planning to live together when we get there. It's going to happen, whether any of you like it or not. So why do we have to wait?"

"Bella, I'd like to hear what you have to say," Kate pressed again. Edward sighed heavily next to me squeezing my hand for reassurance.

"I know all of you think this is a mistake, and maybe it is. But I love Edward and he loves me. I want to marry him," I explained.

"Bella, you both have so much more to live for. You don't have to get married so quickly. You have no idea what it is you'd be giving up, by getting married now. You've missed out on so much already and I want you to be able to experience new things and live life before you settle down into a marriage. There is nothing wrong with waiting," Kate informed.

"And what if we don't want to wait?" Edward asked. "Why can't any of you be happy for us? Haven't we been through enough over the last few months to at least deserve a little support? I mean I understand that all of you think we're too young and we'll regret this. But this is our choice, our life. And I don't think this is a mistake. I could never regret anything I do with Bella." I smiled when he glanced over at me. "Maybe it would be better if we just left. We can take care of ourselves. We can go to Vegas and elope, then get on with our lives without any help from any of you."

"Is this truly what you both want?" Esme asked, sighing in defeat. Everyone in the room looked her way with an astonished look on their faces. Edward looked the most confused. We both nodded our heads hesitantly, wondering if this was some sort of a trap. "Okay then. You both have my support."

"What?" Everyone shouted again. She stood, walking across the room towards us and sat down next to Edward, putting her arm around his shoulders.

"I'm done trying to run my kids' life. It's time for me to let them make their own choices. Both Edward and Bella have shown both strength and courage these past few months. If this is what they want, then it's their choice," she explained, giving us both an encouraging smile.

"Thanks mom," Edward said.

"I love Bella just as much as you do Edward. And even though I'd prefer you both wait, I'd be honored to have her as a daughter," Esme said. Tears began to fall from my eyes. She reached across Edward bringing me into her arms for a hug. When I pulled away from her the three of us looked around at everyone else's faces. Carlisle sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Well, I guess if my wife is okay with this I don't have much option but to agree with her," Carlisle announced.

"Kate," Garrett motioned. She sighed looking back and forth between me and Edward.

"I guess I shouldn't be surprised. I had a feeling this was going to happen. I was just hoping you would at least get through college first. But if everyone else is on board with this, then I guess I need to get my niece ready to be a bride," Kate said with a smile. I jumped up from the couch, running to her and hugging her tightly.

"Thank you," I said, through my tears.

"I hope you know what you're doing," she whispered.

"I do. I love him, Kate," I said. She nodded her head with an apprehensive look on her face.

After we got through the conversation with our families and told everyone else of our plans, I called Alice. I knew she would want to be involved in everything. She rushed over almost immediately and we stayed up all night long making arrangements with Emse and Kate. I didn't know half the stuff they were talking about or suggesting, so I pretty much kept my mouth shut and let them do all the planning.

The following day all the girls went dress shopping in Seattle. Alice was upset that we were doing this so fast, because now I was going to have to find something off the rack that fit. There was no time for alterations. So I was forced to try on almost every dress in sight. But nothing fit right or looked right to her liking or anyone else. I was seriously considering getting married in my prom dress. It really didn't matter to me and I knew Edward wouldn't care either. When I tried on yet another dress and walked out, everyone gave me a disgusted look, but Esme suddenly smiled and had a look on her face like something had just clicked. I hoped she wasn't going to say this was the dress, because I myself hated this dress.

"I think I might know of something that you could wear. But you'll have to wait until tomorrow," she announced.

"What is it?" Charlotte asked.

"It's just something I might be able to pull together. But I'll need to go home and see what I can do first," Esme explained. "So let's focus on everyone else for the rest of the day. I think Bella has had enough." I let out a sigh of relief when she said that. Everyone laughed at my obvious relief, which of course made me blush.

I rushed back to the dressing room to get out of the hideous dress they had forced me into and put my own clothes on. We spent the rest of the day shopping for the younger girls, who were all so excited to be wearing such pretty dresses.

Edward and I decided that since the wedding was only going to consist of family and a few friends, we weren't going to make it a huge production with bridesmaids and groomsman. It was just going to be us and our families would watch. Carmen was upset at first, but when she found out she still got to wear a dress and have her hair done, she was okay with it.

When we were done shopping for the day and headed home later that night, I felt exhausted. After staying up most of the night making plans then shopping all day, all I wanted to do was sleep. I wasn't surprised when I walked into Edward's room and found him sleeping as well. He had been working all day with all the other men to prepare the backyard for the wedding. I didn't realize all it took to plan a wedding. Even though this was a small affair, it took a lot of people to prepare for it.

I walked in quietly, stripping down to only my panties and a t-shirt, before crawling into bed next to him. He instinctively reached out and pulled me closer to him. "Hi, baby. Did you have a good day shopping?" He asked, still half asleep. I groaned. He chuckled in his half sleep state. Within a few seconds I was fast asleep, wrapped up in his arms.

Early the next morning, before the sun was even up, I awoke sweating profusely and severely dehydrated. I crawled out of the bed as quietly as I could, slipping into the bathroom down the hall to shower. Afterwards I went downstairs to get something to drink, but I found Esme at the table with a large box and a sewing machine.

"There you are," she said brightly. I didn't understand why she was so happy seeing as none of us got much sleep the night before and it was nearly morning now. "I have something for you. I'm not sure if it will work, but I'm hoping it will." I walked over to the table as she began to move stuff aside and open the box. She reached in and pulled out a white wedding dress and held it out in front of me. I glanced down at it briefly before meeting her eyes.

"Where did this come from?" I asked, curiously.

"This was mine," she informed. "I always imagined that I would pass it down to my own daughter someday but I was only blessed with sons. So I thought if you were willing, you might like to have it." I gazed at her with wide eyes and my mouth agape. She was passing her wedding dress to me? "I know it may be a little old fashioned so I've been trying to find ways to update it a little. I took off the poufy sleeves and added a simple spaghetti straps and I'm going to attach these simple organza sleeves that I'm making now. I thought maybe we could add a little beading around the neckline. Of course the large bow in the back will have to go."

"Esme, this is beautiful. I can't believe you're letting me wear this."

"You and Leah are the closest things I'll ever have to daughters and you will be my daughter in just a few days so it seemed fitting. I don't think Rose would ever wear this. But I thought you may want to," she suggested.

"I'd be honored to wear it. Thank you so much," I said, through the lump in my throat. I reached out hugging her tightly.

"You're welcome dear," she said hugging me back. "Now go try it on. I want to see if it fits right and if I need to make any adjustments.

I grabbed the dress and rushed into the bathroom to try it on. It was amazing how well it fit. I didn't think there would need to be any adjustments at all. It was a simple white dress with a tight bodice and a wide skirt with layer after layer of silk. There was a small train, which I was thankful for since I was afraid I'd probably end up tripping on it or something. The only thing I couldn't do when putting the dress on was fastening all the pearl shaped buttons up the back. Instead I held it shut with my hands and walked out towards the dining room.

Esme gasped, covering her mouth with her hand when she saw me. I could see the tears forming in her eyes. "You look absolutely amazing, Bella," she whispered. "Come here let me help you with the buttons in the back." I walked over to her and she quickly buttoned up every last button. She then pinned on the sleeves she was making. I had no idea she was so good at sewing and crafting things in general. She never ceased to amaze me with all her talents.

After she was done pinning on all the additions she was adding, she brought in a full-size mirror so I could see. I could hardly believe my eyes when I saw myself. The dress was perfect. It was simple yet elegant.

"Bella, you look amazing," Leah gasped, as she walked in the room. Carmen nodded her head in agreement.

"What are you girls doing up?" Esme asked.

"It's morning," they announced in unison. Esme and I looked towards the window realizing that the sun was indeed up.

"Oh," Esme said sheepishly.

Leah and Carmen walked over getting a better look of the dress and asking all kinds of questions. When we started hearing more people moving about the house, we figured I'd better get out of the dress before Edward happened to walk in. Esme sent both the girls upstairs to guard his door so he couldn't get out. I could hear him down the hall yelling at them to let him out. They just giggled and held the door shut with all their strength.

"Okay girls, you can let him out now," I said, when I came out of the bathroom with the dress safely back in the black garment bag.

They let go of the door knob, and it flew open. "What was that all about?" Edward demanded.

"I was trying on my wedding dress. They were guarding your door so you didn't happen to see me in it," I explained.

"Don't tell me you are worried about all those silly superstitions?" he asked with a wide grin on his face.

"It's not a superstition, Edward. I just want you to be surprised. And I think your mom would want that too," I said, wrapping my arms around his neck. He placed his hands on my hips and leaned down to kiss me.

"I'm looking forward to that surprise. I'm looking forward to calling you my wife, too," he revealed, kissing me deeper. We heard giggling from behind us. When we turned we realized Carmen and Leah were still standing in the hallway, watching our intimate moment. I turned red quickly and hid my face in Edward's chest, trying not to laugh.

"Go downstairs," he shouted. They both headed down still giggling with each other.

"So, what's on the agenda today?" He asked, releasing his hold on me a little.

"Uh, I think we're supposed to be meeting with the pastor this afternoon. And I believe Alice is planning to do some decorating today.

"Great," he said, unenthusiastic.

"You were the one who wanted to do this so fast," I argued, playfully.

"I just didn't realize how much effort it took to pull off a small wedding. Maybe we should have just eloped in Vegas or something," he countered.

I laughed. "It's almost over. Then we can start our life together and move to Stanford."

"Well, before we move, we're going on a honeymoon. I'm not missing out on that part of this wedding thing," he disclosed.

"So, where did you have in mind?" I wondered.

"I'm not real sure yet. But I'll think of something." He leaned down, kissing me again.

"Bella, Kate and Alice are here?" Esme yelled up the stairs. We both groaned as we released. He headed into the shower and I went downstairs to see what I was required to do today.

The next two days were full of planning, and last minute arrangements. Alice had put everyone to work setting up the backyard and putting flower arrangements together. A lot of the stuff she was doing seemed pointless just for a family wedding, but I kept my mouth shut. It turned out that since Edward and I announced we were getting married; Alice had been bugging Jasper about their future plans and when they were going to get married. I knew Rosalie had been wondering the same thing about Emmett as well. I hoped that Edward's and my plans hadn't caused any trouble in either of their relationships. But I was afraid they had. Rose had seemed distant towards me and was never around much since we started planning the wedding. I was sure that I had hurt her by telling Edward yes. She had talked about her and Emmett getting married so many times, but Edward and I were going to be first. I'm sure that made her upset.

The last night before the wedding, Esme had me try on the dress one last time with all the adjustments she had made complete. It was absolutely perfect. Esme was glowing with pride and I was happy that after everything that I had put her son and her family through, she was still willing to call me her daughter.

"I want you to promise me something," she said suddenly, as we both stood in front of the mirror taking in my appearance. "I want Edward to finish college. I want him to make something of himself, because I know he has so much potential and he could become something amazing. I need you to make sure he does that. You'll be his wife now. That means he's going to listen to you and trust you with his life much more than he will anyone else. It's probably that way already. But it's going to be even more so once you're married. I want both of you to finish college and make something of yourselves."

"We will Esme. I'll make sure of it. He'll finish," I promised. She nodded her head, smiling.

"Why don't you get out of this dress and meet Edward downstairs. He's going to drive you home so you can get a good night's sleep," she suggested. I nodded my head and she headed out of the room, giving me privacy.

I dressed quickly, placing the dress back on the hanger so it was ready for tomorrow before dashing downstairs to meet Edward. He was waiting in the living room with Emmett and once he saw me walk in, he got a huge grin on his face. I looked at him skeptically, wondering what he was up to.

"Are you ready to go home?" He asked.

"Yes," I said. "I need to get some sleep. Alice is planning to wake me up early to start her torture to make me beautiful."

He reached for my hand, guiding me out the door. "She doesn't need to do anything to make you beautiful you know? You always are."

I blushed at his words. "Thank you."

He opened the car door for me before he went around to the other side and got in next to me. He seemed nervous or on edge about something.

"Are you nervous about tomorrow?" I asked. He smiled taking my hand in his.

"Not at all," he assured. We drove back to my house silently. I was sure we were both thinking about what tomorrow and the future was going to bring.

When we arrived back at my house, he walked me to the door like the perfect gentleman he was and kissed me goodnight. I went inside and quickly rushed to my room to go to bed. It was already really late and I wanted to get as much sleep as possible. Which I knew probably wouldn't be much, but I hoped for at least a little.

I jumped when I heard a rapping on my window. I turned around to see Edward standing on the window ledge. I rushed over to the window, opening it quickly so he could come in.

"What are you doing?" I implored.

"It's the last time I'll get to sneak into your room. I wanted to make it special."

"Edward, what are you up to?" I laughed.

"I needed to do something right," he said, pulling something from his pocket. "I know it's sort of pointless to do this now. But I wanted to do one thing right if nothing else."

I watched as he got down on one knee in front of me. He took a deep breath before he spoke. I was already crying before he got the words out. "Isabella Swan, I promise that no matter what I'm always going to love you. Will you do me the great honor of becoming my wife?"

"Yes," I whispered through the tears.

"I was hoping you'd say that," he chuckled, taking my hand and sliding a simple diamond ring on my finger.

My hand was shaking as he slipped the ring on.

"There," he whispered, kissing my knuckles. "I did something right for a change."

"You do everything right."

"I'm not so sure about that," he said, standing to his feet. "But I want to do this right. I want us to be happy. I want to have a happy life and do everything in my power to make you happy. That's all that matters to me."

"That's all I want too. I want you to be happy," I said, wrapping my arms around his waist.

"You make me happy." He leaned down, kissing me long and full. When he started backing us up towards the bed, I had to stop him.

"Edward, you have to go," I giggled. He groaned pulling away from me.

"Is this another silly superstition?" He questioned.

"No," I replied. "This is me needing sleep so I don't look so horrible that you change your mind tomorrow."

"Not going to happen," he returned simply. "But I'll go anyway. Emmett has some planning to do and he needed my help." He laughed, walking towards the window.

"What's he planning?"

"He's planning to take Rose on a cruise later this summer and he's going to propose," he explained.

"He is?" I said, excitedly.

Yeah, he's been thinking about it for a while now, but today we went with dad and we both bought rings. I have our wedding rings for tomorrow too."

"I had no say in the wedding rings?"

"It's a surprise," he laughed.

"You're just full of surprises aren't you?" He leaned in giving me one last kiss before stepping out on the ledge of the window.

"Get used to it. We're going to be together a long time and I'm sure I'll be surprising you many times throughout the years," he said. The next thing I knew he was jumping across to the tree branch and making his way down.

"I love you," I yelled out as quietly as possible.

He smiled up at me from the ground. "I love you too. I'll see you tomorrow."

The next morning Alice came storming in my room with her arms full of supplies. She rushed me to the bathroom for a shower while she set everything up in my room. I didn't understand why it took so long to get all of this done. The wedding wasn't until later this afternoon, yet here it is six o'clock in the morning and I'm already beginning the day.

After my long shower, Alice spent the next two hours drying my hair then applying numerous products before pinning it all up in curlers. Then she wrapped a handkerchief around it and made me eat some breakfast. She said I was not walking down the aisle on an empty stomach. So even though my stomach was in knots, I ate a light breakfast.

Alice had designated herself the hairdresser and make-up artist for the day so while I ate, she got to work on Leah and Kate.

By the early afternoon, Alice had successfully finished Kate and Leah's hair and we were now heading over to the Cullen house to finish up everything else there.

My hair was still up in the curlers when we pulled into the driveway and I was really worried Edward would see me like this. But Esme was standing on the porch when we arrived and informed us she had sent the boys out to pick up some lunch.

We rushed upstairs and Alice got to work fixing Carmen and Sasha's hair. They were both so excited and giddy.

Around two in the afternoon, the door bell rang. Esme looked at her watch. "That's strange. I wouldn't think anyone would be here this early." She left the room heading downstairs to see who it was. The rest of us went back to talking and getting ready. That was until I heard Esme call my name. I went downstairs with everyone else following close behind. I didn't expect to see the person I did at the door though.

"Sue?" I questioned, in disbelief.

"I shouldn't have come. I should have called first," she said, shaking her head.

"No," I cried out. "You don't have to go.."

"All of you look like you're getting ready for something. I don't want to intrude. I'll go," she insisted.

"Bella and my son are getting married today," Esme informed her.

"You're getting married today?" She questioned.

"Yeah, it was sort of sudden," I explained.

"Then I definitely feel like I should leave. This is a family affair and…"

"No," I interrupted. "I want you to stay. You are family. You should be here."

"I would really like it if you would stay too," Esme added.

I could see the tears welling up in her eyes. "I don't know why I came," she began. "I just felt like I needed to say something or do something for all of you. I feel like I ruined your lives and I should do something to make up for it."

"We don't expect you to do anything," Esme informed.

"I would like it if you would meet Leah and Seth though. They both really want to meet you," I disclosed.

"I'd like to meet them too," she said, wiping at her eyes.

"Please, come in," Esme offered. She walked in the house and I could tell she spotted Leah almost immediately.

"You look just like him," she whispered, more to herself than to anyone else. Leah walked forward extending her hand.

"I'm Leah," she began. "You're my grandma?"

"I guess I am. I haven't been a very good one though," she said regrettably.

"Well you have time," Leah suggested. Sue smiled, nodding her head in agreement. I could see the hurt and regret in Sue's eyes. She looked like the weight of the world was on her shoulders. I knew how that felt. I knew the guilt and pain she was feeling.

"We'd really like it if you would stay for the wedding," Esme offered.

"It's just a small family wedding. But it would mean a lot to all of us if you'd stay," I added.

"If you really want me too," she accepted.

"I would," I said. "But can I take you somewhere first?"

"Take me somewhere?" She questioned, skeptically.

"It's not far," I added.

I grabbed the keys off the table and headed out the door. "Okay." She followed hesitantly.

"Bella, your hair," Alice exclaimed.

"I'll be back quickly. There's something I need to do," I said, jumping in the car. Sue got into the passenger seat. I thought about telling her that I technically didn't have my driver's license yet, but I didn't. We weren't going far and I was going to be careful. She was silent the during the five minute drive it took to get to the cemetery. I pulled in, parking the car and got out. I started walking along the pathway hoping that she would follow.

I stopped when I came to the gravestone for James. I looked back making sure she followed and waited for her to reach me. When she stopped next to me and looked down, she broke down, sobbing uncontrollably and falling to her knees.

I leaned down next to her and placed my arm around her shoulders. As soon as I did I could feel her body turn stiff and she was trying so hard not to let out the sobs that were still caught in her chest.

"It's okay to be upset," I whispered. "You were his mother and you should feel sad." She let one small sob escape.

"Why are you being so nice to me? I caused all this pain and suffering your family has endured. Why would you care about how I'm feeling?" She asked, through her sobs. "You should hate me for not being strong enough to save him. You shouldn't want me to be a part of your life."

"Do you have any idea how much I've blamed myself for all of this? But I learned something from all of it. We all have guilt and regrets but what matters is learning from them and trying to do better."

Why is this so hard? I should hate him for what he did to you…"

"No, you shouldn't," I interrupted. "You should love him. He was your son and he always will be. You made mistakes, but that doesn't change the fact that you were his mother. He deserves to be loved."

"So you're telling me that you forgive him for everything he did to you and your brother and sister, even what he did to your boyfriend?"

"I didn't say he should be forgiven or pardoned for what he did. He did do some really horrible things to us. But he does deserve compassion and understanding. I don't blame him for what he did. That might sound strange coming from someone he hurt, but it takes more energy to hate him than it does to let it go. He suffered the same pain I did, so I can't hold that against him. He deserves to have someone actually care about him."

"How do I make this up to all of you? I was a horrible mother to him and my daughter. I need to do something to make this better," she said.

"You have a second chance to be a grandma to Seth and Leah. They need as much family and support as they can possibly get."

"How did you become so wise at such a young age?" She asked, bewildered.

I smiled, looking over at the gravestone. "I guess that's one thing he gave me."

"Edward is a very lucky young man to be marrying you. I hope he realizes that," she revealed. I smiled.

"I think I'm the lucky one. He saved me and made me who I am today," I admitted.

"I wish you both the best and hope you have long and happy life together,"

"Thank you, I hope so too," I said. "I'm going to go over there for a minute to give you some privacy." She nodded her head, wiping at her tears. I stood to my feet and walked the couple yards over to where my mom lay.

I sat down on the ground, dusting off the stone and tracing her name with my fingers. I hadn't been here in so long. I imagined no one had for years. I closed my eyes remembering the last time I saw her happy. That was the memory I wanted to keep of her. What happened in the past needs to be forgotten and I only wanted to focus on the future with Edward. "I'm getting married today, mom," I spoke to the stone in the ground. "I wish so bad that you could be here with me. But I know even if I can't see you, you're here. I think you would really like Edward. He's everything I could ever want and I still don't understand why he loves me the way he does. But maybe you had something to do with that," I giggled. "You sent me an angel. I love you mom," I whispered that last sentiment before standing to walk back towards the car. I got in and shortly after, Sue got in as well. She reached out, squeezing my hand and turning to look at me.

"Thank you," she said simply. I nodded my head and gave her a smile before heading back. She looked so much better now. She didn't look like she was carrying a heavy burden anymore. I was glad. I didn't want her to feel responsible for any of this. I didn't want Esme to feel that way either. I was beginning to learn not to blame myself for any of it as well. That's what was most important. None of us were to blame. It was just something that bonded us and changed who we are today.

"You know Edward called me," she revealed. I turned to her with a shocked expression before turning back to watch the road. "He told me you two were getting married and planning to go to college together. He said you really wanted me to come see Seth and Leah before you left. He also said you didn't blame me for anything that happened. He never told me you two were planning to get married so soon though. I guess I understand why he insisted I come now."

"It was sort of sudden. He asked me earlier this week. Actually he asked me during our graduation ceremony. We sort of threw the wedding together really quick so his aunt and uncle and their children could still be here before they head home to Chicago," I explained. "But he's right, I don't blame you. You don't deserve any of the blame. Whatever happened in the past is over and I want to move forward. I really hope you'll consider being a part of our lives now that you know where we are."

"I'd really like that Bella," she said. We sat quietly the last few minutes of the drive. When I parked the car and reached for the door handle, I saw Seth come rushing out. He stopped a few feet away, watching excitedly.

Sue stepped out and gazed at him with such adoration. "Seth, I want you to meet someone," I informed, guiding him over to her. "This is Sue. She's dad's mom." She reached out her hand to his, waiting for him to shake it, but he took one look at her hand then leapt into her arms. She stumbled backwards a little, but wrapped her arms around him, holding him tightly.

"Come on. I want you to meet Edward. He's my best friend and my sister is going to marry him today," he grabbed her hand guiding her to the back yard. She giggled at his enthusiasm, but followed.

"Oh Bella," Alice gasped. "Look at your make-up. And what did you do to your hair?" She started fumbling around with my hair while we walked back to the house. "I need to get you back upstairs and try to fix this mess you made."

She rushed me back to the room upstairs and quickly started touching up my make-up and pinning my hair back up in curlers.

"Where is everyone?" I asked, glancing around the empty room that not an hour ago was full of girls getting ready.

"Carlisle and Esme invited a few of their friends from the hospital and school to the wedding, so they're downstairs mingling," she explained. "The wedding is in less than an hour you know? I was starting to get worried you weren't going to make it back in time. Where did you go anyway?"

"I took her to the cemetery. She needed time to grieve and tell her son goodbye," I said. She was silent for a few minutes. I knew what she was thinking. She didn't think anyone should grieve for him. I'm sure most people felt that way. But he was her son and if it was Seth, who was like a son to me, I would still grieve and still love him. I wouldn't condone what he did or accept it in anyway, but he would still need someone to love him. Thankfully Seth would never be that way. I would make sure of it as would everyone else that was filling up this house at the moment.

I was brought out of my thinking when there was a light knock on the door. Alice and I both glanced in that direction when Rose walked in.

"Hi Rose," I greeted. She smiled.

"I just thought I'd come up and see if you need any help," she offered.

"Could I?" Alice mocked. "She's made a mess of her hair when she went out with Sue. I'm doing my best to fix it, but I could really use some help." Rose walked over and both of them started pulling in every direction. I grimaced many times as they pulled and prodded.

"I'm sorry I've been so distant the last few days Bella," Rose apologized. "I was just upset. Emmett hasn't wanted to discuss marriage lately and I started to wonder when we used to talk about it, if it was just me talking and he would agree out of politeness or avoid making me upset. I'm starting to wonder if it's even worth it to be with him anymore. But then I think about all of you and how much I enjoy being a part of this family and I don't want to give that up. I don't know what to do anymore."

"Rose, I understand and it's okay," I accepted. "And please, please, don't give up on Emmett. He'll come around. He just does things his own way, just like Edward does." I gave her a smile, trying my best not to reveal too much, but I think she got my hint when she smiled and took in a long breath. I hoped Emmett didn't screw this up. I really wanted her to be happy.

"What about you Alice?" Rose asked. "Have you and Jasper talked about getting married at all?"

"We have. But we both agreed that we wanted to see where things led us. We want to go to college and experience all kinds of things we both want to do before we settle down and get married. I think it will happen someday though."

"Do you both think I'm doing the right thing?" I asked. They turned towards the mirror to see my face.

"Do you love him Bella?" Rose asked. I nodded my head.

"Can you picture your life with him years from now," Alice asked. I nodded my head again, remembering the dream I had in Chicago.

"Can you picture your life without him?" Alice asked. I shook my head, vehemently.

"Then I say you're doing the right thing," Rose answered.

"Me too," Alice agreed. "What may not be right for some, is right for others. So if you feel in your heart this is right, then you are doing what's right for you."

"But if that boy ever hurts you. You better come tell me right away so I can kick his ass," Rose added, seriously. We all laughed.

"He won't hurt me," I promised.

"There," Alice proclaimed. "I think we're done. So let's get that dress on and you are ready Miss Swan."

That's the last time anyone will get to call you that," Rose observed. "In just a few minutes you'll be Mrs. Isabella Cullen." The name hit me like a ton of bricks. I knew that I would take his name, but I hadn't ever said it out loud. It seemed strange to hear it spoken. I was going to be Mrs. Bella Cullen.

I slipped into the dress with the help of Rose and Alice. I looked over myself in the mirror. I was pleasantly surprised at how amazing they had made me look.

I sat up in the room by myself, while Alice and Rose went downstairs to join the rest of the guests.

I heard my cell phone buzz across the room, so I rushed over to it to see who it was. I wasn't surprised when I saw Edward's name on the screen. I smiled as I answered it.

"I just wanted to tell you that I love you and I can't wait to see you," he said.

"I can't wait either. How much longer, until I get to come down?" I asked.

"I think in about fifteen minutes," he answered, pausing for a few seconds. "I like Sue. She's really nice and Seth has seemed to take to her rather quickly. She's sitting with him and Kate now."

"Thank you for calling her," I revealed.

"She told you?"

"Yes, she did. I'm glad you did too. I think this is a good thing. She needs family and I think Seth and Leah are really going to enjoy having her around. I don't know how long she's planning to stay, but I hope it's for a while."

"I'm glad it all worked out. I know you've been worried about her," he said.

"How do you know that?"

"You talk about her in your sleep. You talk about your mom too," he explained.

"I do?"

"Yes you do. I wish I could surprise you with your mom, but unfortunately I can't," he said regrettably.

"It's okay. She's with me even if I can't see her, I said.

"Yes she is," he agreed.

"Where are you right now?"

"I'm standing at the front of the aisle waiting for you."

"Well then why am I sitting up here? If everyone is here, let's get this thing going," I suggested.

He laughed. "There's one more surprise I have for you before we can get this started," he revealed.

"One more surprise?" I asked in disbelief.

"Yep, it should be coming up the stairs now," he disclosed. "I'll let you go so you can see what it is. I'll see you in a few minutes." He hung up the phone, just as there was a knock on the door. I opened it up and came face to face with the one and only friend I made while we lived in Florida.

"Emily," I shrieked, astonished at the sight of her. I hadn't seen her since that day I revealed to her who Felix was and why we had to have a bodyguard. Once we got back to Forks, I wasn't allowed to call her or have any contact with her at all. I felt horrible about leaving without even saying goodbye. But once James was caught, I emailed her and explained the situation. She was very understanding and hoped that we could still be friends even if only through email. We instant messaged and emailed each other quite often. But now, here she was standing in front of me, looking almost more excited than I did.

"Hi Bella," she squealed in return.

"What are you…? How did you…? I can't believe you're here," I stuttered.

"I know, neither can I. But Edward called me the other day and said you two were getting married and he wanted to know if I would like to come. He paid for the plane tickets and arranged for a hotel and transportation. I always wanted to come out this way. My mom came with me and while we're here, we're checking out some of the colleges in the area. I'm really leaning towards Washington State. It's far away but it would be fun to have that experience."

"Edward planned all of this?" I asked. She nodded her head.

"He's a really great guy, Bella. You didn't do him justice when you described him to me back in Florida. I never knew how amazing he really was until I met him face to face. You are so lucky to have such a great guy," she expressed.

"I know. I am lucky."

"I can't believe you're getting married. What brought on the sudden decision to get married?"

"I think it was a mixture of a lot of things. But neither of us wants to wait so we're doing it now. Then we can focus on getting ready for college," I explained.

"Well, I do know one thing. That guy down there loves you. There's no denying that. You should see him. He's glowing with pride and excitement. It's actually quite adorable," she revealed.

"I love him too," I said truthfully. She reached out and gave me a hug, just as Kate, Esme, Alice, and Leah all came rushing through the door. I wiped at my eyes, making sure there were no traces of tears before Alice saw.

"Alright, it's about that time," Alice said excitedly. "Now we have the something old. That would be the dress. For something borrowed and blue, I have this sapphire bracelet that Jasper gave me when we first started dating. I thought you might like to wear it." She placed it around my wrist and fastened the clasp. I was doing everything in my power to hold it together.

"As for something new," Kate began. "Garrett, Leah, Seth, and I got you this." She held out a small square box for me. I took it from her hands and opened the lid to reveal a pair of diamond earrings. I gasped when I first saw them. "There's a card from Garrett as well. He wouldn't let me look at it though so I don't know what it says." I reached for the card, ripping it open at the seam.

I want to congratulate both you and Edward on your marriage. I know Kate seems to think I don't have any significance in any of your lives because I'm not family, but I've always looked at you as a daughter. When you were a little girl and Kate would bring you by, I used to imagine what it would be like if you were mine and Kate's child. After she left, I still kept tabs as much as I could on how you were doing and what you were up to. I wish I would have paid better attention then. But I know now you are in good hands. Edward is a good man and he'll take care of you. I feel like I'm a father giving away my daughter to the man she loves today, as silly as that may sound. I know I'm not your dad and I never will be, but thank you for letting me into your life, even if I'm not family. I hope someday we will be. And thank you for bringing Kate back into my life. Good Luck today and I wish you both the best. -Garrett

Tears began to stream down my face as I read what he wrote silently. I heard Alice clicking her tongue at me.

"You couldn't wait to read the card until after the wedding?" She asked in irritation. She grabbed a tissue and started dabbing at my eyes while I tried my best to console myself.

"Alright, I think it's about time," Esme announced. "Are you ready dear?"

I nodded my head. Everyone started leaving the room, giving me last minute well wishes. I called for Leah to stay.

As soon as everyone was gone I asked her to do me favor. "I need you to go ask Garrett if he'll come up here quickly."

"Why? What's going on?" She asked with a worried tone.

"Nothing, I just need to talk to him for a minute before I go down." She nodded her head, still looking at me questioningly. I took a few deep breaths, checking myself in the mirror to make sure there were no streaks of mascara under my eyes.

There was a light knock on the door before Garrett walked in. "Bella is everything ok?" He asked. "Leah said you needed to see me before you could come down. What's wrong?"

"I read the card you asked Kate to give me," I informed him.

He huffed. "I asked her to wait until after the ceremony."

"I don't have a dad. My real dad left when I was a baby and I have no interest in finding him. My step dad was abusive and is dead now." The tears started burning my eyes again. I paused, trying to hold them back. "I need someone to give me away. You're the closest thing I have to a dad and I was hoping you would be willing to do that."

He smiled, his lip even quivered, slightly. "I'd be honored to." I nodded my head, unable to speak. I sighed trying to relax. I turned back to the mirror dabbing at my eyes once again and realizing by this point it was useless to even try. As soon as I got down there and saw Edward, I'd probably end up crying again anyway.

"I think everyone is waiting for you," Garrett said. I turned back around to face him as he held out his arm for me. I grabbed the bouquet of flowers on the bed then took his arm.

He guided me down the stairs slowly. I was glad Alice allowed me to wear flats instead of forcing me into heels for this. I would have surely fallen if she had. When we hit the bottom floor and headed for the doors that led outside where everyone was watching for me, my anxiety rose so much I was afraid I was going to faint. I was glad I asked Garrett to walk me down the aisle. At least if I did faint, he'd catch me.

But when Edward's and my eyes connected, all the fears and anxiety I was feeling disappeared. All that existed was us. When he saw me, his mouth opened and I could see him take in a deep breath before a pleasing smile spread across his face. Like I thought, the tears were filling my eyes once again, but I didn't care. When we reached Edward, I vaguely heard the pastor saying a few words before asking who gives this woman to be married. Garrett very proudly answered "her aunt and I" before passing me on to Edward. I took his hand and suddenly realized that after today, nothing would ever be the same. This was what I prayed for and hoped for all those years, but I never thought it would ever happen. My life would be forever changed because of the man who stood in front of me that I was planning to spend the rest of my life with.

The ceremony was very simple, sticking to the traditional vows. I cried during the entire ceremony and I could tell Edward was holding back from doing the same.

I could barely get the words "I do" out without sobbing uncontrollably.

Edward was bursting with excitement when he said the words. He was getting anxious for this to be final and over with. When the pastor finally said "you may kiss the bride" I quickly wrapped my arms around his neck, kissing him with all the passion I could possibly give him in front of everyone. He wrapped his arms around my waist, lifting me off the ground and twirling me around. I heard everyone giggling and cheering, but I didn't care.

When he put me down we walked back down the aisle hand in hand, while everyone clapped. Once back in the house, he wrapped me up in his arms holding on to me as tight as he could. "I love you Mrs. Isabella Cullen," he laughed, excitedly.

"I love you too," I giggled back.

"Is this my mom's dress?" He asked, pulling away to look at me.

"Yeah, you could actually tell?" I asked, amazed that he would recognize it.

"Well, there's a big picture hanging in the hallway from my parents wedding day, so I've looked at it every day since I can remember," he explained.

"Oh," I remembered. My head fell from disappointment. I wondered if maybe he didn't like it. If he'd seen it every day throughout his life, he was probably sick of it by now.

"It looks much better on you though," he whispered. "You have got to be the most beautiful bride I've ever seen." I smiled, feeling the pride and joy building inside of me.

"Don't tell your mother that," I warned.

He smirked and lightly shook his head. "Never," he breathed across my lips before kissing me.

"Congratulations, you two," Esme said as she and Carlisle walked up. She hugged us both as did Carlisle and every other person who was there.

The rest of the reception was a complete blur. I was passed around from person to person on the dance floor. I danced with Garrett, Carlisle, and Emmett, even Peter and Jasper had their turn. All of them wishing us luck and congratulating us. It became very mundane after a while. All I wanted was to be with Edward, but he was having the same problem with all the females. He even danced with Leah and it looked to me that they were in a very intense conversation.

When we finally were able to dance together later that night, I asked him what she said and he explained that she was giving him a warning that he better not ever hurt me. He of course told her that he never would. I had complete faith in him that he would never do anything to hurt me and always take care of me. I would do the same for him.

"So, did you see the significance of the ring?" He asked as we danced.

"No," I answered, taking another look at it. I was just a simple gold band. Nothing extravagant about it, but it was perfect. He took my hand in his, stopping us in the middle of the dance floor. He turned my hand over and at the base of the ring in tiny delicate writing was the word 'love'. I was so distracted by everyone that I hadn't noticed it. He turned his hand over revealing the word 'fate' on his ring. I smiled, fighting back the tears.

"You are my fate and my love," he whispered, before giving me a simple kiss.

"You are the most incredible person I have ever met," I insisted. "I love you so much." I pulled him close to me, clinging to him while he slowly started moving us across the dance floor again.

As the night finally came to an end, Alice rushed me upstairs helping me get out of the dress and change my clothes. I was all packed and ready to go when I came down the stairs. Garrett grabbed my bags placing them in the trunk of the car, while Edward and I gave everyone hugs before leaving.

When we got in the car I turned back around to wave goodbye one last time.

"Are you going to tell me where we're going now?" I asked, turning to him while he started up the car. He grinned turning towards me.

"Since you're going to find out as soon as we get on the plane then yes I'll tell you. We're going to Alaska," he revealed.

"Alaska?" I asked in disbelief. "Why Alaska?"

"It's the best I could do on such short notice," he chuckled.

"Isn't it snowing and cold there?"

"Not this time of year," he explained. "At least it's not where we're going. It won't be much different than here but there are lots of things to do and places to see. We can go hiking or horseback riding. There are kayaking and wildlife tours we can do. I even booked us a plane tour of The Denali National Park. The best part is I rented us a secluded cabin. We'll be surrounded by lots and lots of trees, and nothing else." He smirked while explaining the cabin. I smiled, understanding his meaning. This would be just us. No one would be there to interrupt us or get in the way. We would have complete freedom to be us.

"I kind of think I'd rather spend all of our time in the cabin," I hinted.

He hummed as he leaned closer to me across the seat. His fingers laced into my hair pulling me closer to him. "That can definitely be arranged," he whispered, before pressing his lips to mine. I opened my mouth allowing him to deepen the kiss, just as there was a knock on the window of the car.

"Hey, why don't you wait to get to the honeymoon before you do that," Emmett said, jokingly. "I don't want to have to throw you in jail on your wedding night for reckless driving."

Edward pulled away, grumbling as he did. I could hear everyone standing in the driveway laughing. I was sure I was turning red.

"See this is why we need the seclusion of the forest in Alaska," Edward enlightened.

"Then let's get out of here," I suggested. "Don't we have a plane to catch, Mr. Cullen?"

He laughed lightly, putting the car in gear and pulling out of the driveway. "Yes we do, Mrs. Cullen."

**Esme POV**

"Do you think they'll make it?" Carlisle asked, wrapping his arms around me from behind. I leaned back against his chest, as we watched our youngest son and his new bride, drive away.

"I hope so. But they're both strong and if they can make it through everything they've been through already, I think they can make it through anything. I have to have faith that I'm doing the right thing for my son. I have to let him go and let him make his own choices," I said, with a remorseful tone.

"They'll be fine, Esme. He loves her and she'll make sure he strives for the best. He'll do the same for her."

I patted his arm assuring him I understood what he meant. They will be fine. They still have a lot of growing to do, but they'll do it together. They'll help each other through it all and become stronger people in the process. Bella very well could be the greatest thing that ever happened to my son. I'm positive that he was the best thing that ever happened to her. I couldn't be more proud of both of them as I watched them drive away, starting their lives together as one.


	28. Epilogue

**Here is the end of this story. I hope you all enjoy it. **

**A question I had that I wanted to address was who was helping James. Actually no one was, it's not his style. Everyone suspected it, because he knew things that they didn't think he could know without help but actually he was just really smart and knew what they were thinking and planning. He's a master manipulator and always knew their steps before even they did at times. Bella mentioned at one point that she didn't think someone was helping him and she knew him better than anyone. They should have been listening to her all along. Sorry I didn't make that clearer but it was just James and Bella knew this.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters involved.**

* * *

**Heaven: Bryan Adams**

Oh - thinkin' about all our younger years

There was only you and me

We were young and wild and free

Now nothin' can take you away from me

We've been down that road before

But that's over now

You keep me comin' back for more

Baby you're all that I want

When you're lyin' here in my arms

I'm findin' it hard to believe

We're in heaven

And love is all that I need

And I found it there in your heart

It isn't too hard to see

We're in heaven

Oh - once in your life you find someone

Who will turn your world around

Bring you up when you're feelin' down

Yeah - nothin' could change what you mean to me

Oh there's lots that I could say

Just hold me now

Cause our love will light the way

And baby you're all that I want

When you're lyin' here in my arms

I'm findin' it hard to believe

We're in heaven

And love is all that I need

And I found it there in your heart

It isn't too hard to see

We're in heaven

I've been waitin' for so long

For something to arrive

For love to come along

Now our dreams are comin' true

Through the good times and the bad

Ya - I'll be standin' there by you

**10 years later**

**BPOV**

It has been ten years since Edward came into my life. I'll never forget that day he asked me to go with him to the dance. I honestly thought he was just doing it as some sort of joke. I never would have imagined that ten years later we would still be married and living back in Forks, close to our families.

After our wedding, we headed for Alaska and spent most of our time in a little cabin deep in the forest. It was perfect and just what we needed. There were no worries, no interruptions, we were completely free. We explored a few things on our trip and went on that airplane tour of the Denali National Forest, but mostly we just stayed in the cabin, lying by the fireplace and keeping each other warm. Everything about it was perfect.

When we left later that summer for college, everything seemed like nothing would ever go wrong again. I was able to get into college that year and Edward and I had found a small apartment close to school. At first things seemed great. But when I started going into that mode of cleaning and cooking and making sure everything was in perfect order to make Edward happy, neglecting my own studies to do so, Edward got upset and trashed our apartment one night. He said he'd rather live in a messy apartment, than me to fail out of college. When he first did it, I got scared and wanted to leave. I wanted to go home. But Edward, who always tried to be calm and comforting with me, sat us both down and we had a long talk about how to make this work. We had to compromise on quite a few things, but we worked together to make us both happy and in the end, everything worked out. I still struggled with going back into the way I used to be, but Edward always tried to be patient with me and help me through it.

I had to find a new counselor when we got to Stanford. Edward was always there to make sure I went to my sessions, and even attended many of them with me. He wanted to do everything possible to help me deal with what had happened over the years. Thankfully having the counseling and having Edward for support truly did help. Edward and I only seemed to get stronger from this experience.

Edward struggled quite a bit in school, not academically, but emotionally. He had no idea what he wanted to do with his life and that frustrated him. He longed to play football again, but he couldn't.

We went to every home football game and Edward even volunteered to help out on the field during games. I could tell it hurt him, every time I would see him watching the game and not be able to play. I always had so much guilt for taking that away from him. But every time I would start to feel the guilt consuming me, Edward would reach his hand out for mine, linking our fingers together and whisper in my ear that it was worth it.

His words always made me feel better and I didn't understand how he always knew exactly when I needed to hear them. I think at times maybe he was trying to convince himself of the fact that I was worth it too.

After a visit home for Christmas one year, Edward had some sort of an epiphany or something, because when we got back to our apartment, he could hardly contain his excitement. He had decided that he wanted to be a teacher like his mom. He liked school, he liked kids, and everything seemed to be leading him in that direction anyway.

We both focused really hard on finishing school and making something of ourselves. We wanted to prove to our families that we could make it through together. We both knew they all had doubts about how long we would last. But we did last and now we were living back in Forks together and happy. Edward got a job at the local high school as an English teacher, while I became a nurse. I worked with Carlisle for a while, since I enjoyed being at the hospital, but eventually I was offered a job working at the elementary school as the school nurse. I took the job almost immediately. I liked working at the school and being close to Esme. She was still teaching and I had a feeling she may have been responsible for getting me the job at the school. We became very close over the years and she truly was one of my best friends.

Leah is in College now, with high hopes of being a veterinarian. She always did love animals and it would fit her to be a veterinarian. She even found time to volunteer at a local animal shelter. Esme and Kate were always so supportive of her decisions and did everything in their power to help her through.

Alice and Jasper were abroad traveling the world and building a life together, even though they weren't married yet. Alice and I talked almost daily whether through phone calls or email. She was still waiting on him to pop the question, but to her, it didn't matter if they were married or not. All that mattered was that they were still together and happy, which they were and I think they probably always would be.

Emmett finally did take Rose on that cruise later that summer and asked her to marry him. Rose, being the spontaneous one, and not willing to wait, decided to get married right there on the ship. When they got back, it was quite humorous how upset Esme was that she didn't get to be there to see her son get married. So at Christmas time that year, Rosalie and Emmett had this huge extravagant wedding and reception. Of course Rose was quite the bridezilla. I think she and Esme butted heads over just about every detail. I, for whatever reason was stuck in the middle to try and sooth everything out. Esme liked Rose and was happy for her and Emmett, but she didn't care for Rosalie's ideas for the wedding. But in the end Esme was usually the one to bend and give in to what Rose wanted. It was probably easier that way anyway.

Garrett and Kate got married about three years later while on vacation in Mexico. I guess they had planned to get married there, but just forgot to tell any of us. It was okay though. They needed the time alone and time to reconnect. Things were never easy between either of them. They were both so stubborn. But in the end, they both knew that they would always love each other no matter what and if they could make it through what they already had; they could make it through anything. It was strange how much Kate and Garrett's relationship emulated Edward's and mine. In a way, I think that was a good thing though, because we learned from each other.

Sue came to visit as often as she could over the years. She even came to Stanford to visit me and Edward a couple of times. It was always so good to see her and she seemed so happy when she would get here. Seth seemed to take to her more than anyone else. Over the years they got very close and Seth would even travel to Chicago to visit her for the summers.

About two years ago though, during one of her visits, she got really sick and unfortunately didn't get any better. She stayed with me and Edward, those last few months of her life and I think she preferred it that way. She was surrounded by people who loved her and knew that she wasn't alone.

Her death was hard on all of us, but her last words were telling us that she loved us and that she was so proud of all of us for making it out of what we had been through. I think she found peace and came to terms with what happened and knew it wasn't her fault. At least I hoped she did.

As for Seth, he started playing pee-wee football that fall when Edward and I left for college. Emmett and Garrett took a big interest in coaching his team. Over the years he got really good and he wasn't the scrawny little kid anymore.

Last year, Edward was offered a job as assistant coach of the high school football team by the same coach who coached him all those years ago. Edward was overjoyed. I don't think I had ever seen him so excited and happy. Six months later, the head coach decided to retire suddenly, after his wife wanted to relocate to a warmer climate. That left Edward taking over the position of head coach. Seth was thrilled to have him be his coach. Even still Seth looked to Edward for everything. He idolized Edward probably a lot more than he should, but I think everyone was just happy that he had someone to look up to that was a good role model in his life.

I don't think having Edward as his coach was all Seth thought it would be though. Edward pushed him to be the best and stayed late night after night running drills with him. Edward came home most nights completely exhausted. It worried me, but he insisted he was fine and not overdoing it. I wasn't so sure though.

This is where we were now. It is Seth's senior year in high school and this is the first game of the season. It is an important game not only for Seth, but for Edward as well. We had been hearing rumors that scouts were already out going from school to school, which Seth is nervous about. But also, this would be Edwards chance to shine. Even though he was given the job as head coach, it didn't mean that he would keep it. He had to prove to the school board that he could handle the position. Both of these facts made me nervous for them. I wanted them to do well and succeed. They both needed this.

"How are you feeling dear?" Esme asked me. We sat in the stands with Kate and Garrett, cheering both Seth and Edward on, in this all important game.

"I'm feeling alright. I've been a little tired, but other than that everything is looking really good," I replied. She patted my knee and gave me a smile.

"I still can't believe you're about to have a baby," Kate added. "Your mom would be so excited and happy for you. She'd be spoiling both you and the baby rotten."

"Well, I have an aunt that takes her place quite nicely," I said, grinning at her. She blushed.

"I have been going a little overboard with the gifts haven't I?" She asked, bashfully.

"I think everyone has. Alice and Jasper sent us this adorable little outfit from Europe. And of course we have Esme here who has set up a whole room at her house for the baby," I replied.

"Well, I am going to be a grandma. I need to be prepared," she said, defensively. We all laughed.

Edward and I had been trying to have a baby for the last five years with no luck. We both wanted a baby so bad though, so we went to a fertility specialist and even still, there was nothing. I was getting really discouraged and thought that I would never have a baby, but by some miracle it finally happened nine months ago. All of our family was excited and happy for us. They all knew what we had gone through for this to happen, so it made it even more special. This would be the first grandchild for Carlisle and Esme and I had a feeling it may be the only grandchild. Neither Esme nor I thought Rose and Emmett would ever have any kids. But then again after seeing their nephew, they may change their mind.

"Hi everyone," Rose called out. She and Emmett climbed the stands and sat down next to us. Rose instinctively reached her hand out and started rubbing my pregnant belly. "How's my baby doing?"

"We're doing great Rose. It should be any time now," I informed her excitedly.

"I've been counting down days for the big event. I can't wait until I get to hold that little baby in my arms," she said with a huge grin. "I'm going to be his favorite aunt you know? I'm on speed dial for babysitting duty right?"

"All of you are ridiculous," I laughed. "I'm probably not even going to see my own child the first few years of his life." They all looked away in embarrassment.

"Where's dad," Emmett asked, watching the game, but noticing Carlisle wasn't here.

"He's at the hospital," Esme answered. "He was hoping he'd be able to get off in time for the game, but you know how it goes."

"He looks stressed," I informed everyone as I watched Edward running his hand through his hair, looking down at the clipboard in his other hand. All of their eyes followed mine to the field.

"He'll be fine Bella," Esme comforted.

"This is just a big game for them," I added. "There's a lot riding on this game for him. You all know he's trying to prove himself worthy of head coach. If he can't cut it, then the school board may try to find a different coach for the rest of the year. Being head coach is so important to him. I don't want him to lose this. He's already lost so much."

"Bella, don't stress," Kate worried. "You don't want to put undue stress on the baby."

"The baby's fine," I asserted, although I wasn't so sure. I had been having mild back pain all day and just felt off. I didn't let on to anyone though. I wanted today to be about Edward and Seth. If I told anyone that I wasn't feeling that great, they all would have fussed over me. I didn't want that.

We watched the game in nervous silence. My eyes very rarely left Edward. As the game went on, I could tell he was getting more frustrated. His team was not doing well at all. They fumbled the ball more times than I could count. They were missing throws and field goals.

As I watched Edward get more and more stressed, I could feel the pain getting stronger and I was beginning to think it may be time to have this baby. But I had to get through his game first though. I was not going to pull Edward away from what he loved and what he had dreamed about for so long. He may not be playing, but in his heart he was on that field with every one of his team members.

It was getting close to the end of the game and it wasn't looking good. He glanced up at the crowd briefly, searching for me. When our eyes connected, I gave him a reassuring smile and he smiled back. I couldn't be sure, but it looked like he took a huge sigh of relief, before turning around and focusing on the game. He called a timeout, calling in all the players. He started talking to the team and showing them something on the clipboard. Within seconds, the team was back in formation on the field.

"What's he doing?" Kate asked.

"He's putting Seth in," I replied.

"Why?" Emmett wondered.

"Because Seth can get the ball back," I answered. Seth may have been the quarterback, but he was also fast. If anyone could get the ball back, it would be Seth.

Just like Edward wanted, Seth ran across the field, straight for the ball. No one could have caught him. He jumped in front of the ball before the other team member could catch it and intercepted the throw. The crowd cheered and jumped to their feet. I did the same, feeling the excitement yet fear that I knew Edward was feeling.

Once I stood to my feet the real pain hit. It felt like a thousand knives stabbing me. It took my breath away and I had to sit down.

"Bella, are you okay?" Esme asked. Everyone's focus suddenly was on me.

"I'm fine. I just had a sharp pain. I just need to sit down for a minute. I'll be fine," I tried to reassure all of them, through my heavy breathing.

"Do you need me to get Edward?" Emmett questioned.

"NO! He has to finish the game. I'm fine."

"Bella, if you're feeling pain that's causing you to feel the need to sit down and breathe this heavily I have to get you to the hospital," Kate ordered.

"Please, I have to be here to support him. The games almost done," I pleaded. "Once it's over, I'll go. I promise."

"We can give it a few more minutes can't we?" Rose butted in, trying to side with me.

"How long have you been having the pains?" Esme asked.

"Off and on all day, but they started getting stronger when we got here," I answered.

"You know Edward will come now and hand over the rest of the game to the assistants," Emmett insisted. "He loves you and the baby more than football, Bella."

"I don't want to take this away from him. I've already taken away enough and I'm not doing it again," I argued. "Please, I'll be fine. I'm not going anywhere until this game is over and Edward is with me."

They all gave me defeated glances and kept their focus on the last few minutes of the game. Seth had successfully been able to carry the team down the field. They were almost in range for a field goal. They just needed to get it a little closer. The seconds were ticking down. It's all they needed and they would be able to win the game.

I got another sharp pain, just as the ball was hiked into Seth's hands. He pulled back getting into position to throw, but no one was open. The other team was closing in on him, so he ducked away from them and ran.

Everyone started cheering and chanting his name. All he needed was to get to the twenty yard line for the field goal, but he didn't stop. He ran faster than I had ever seen him run before. He was not going to let anyone catch him.

The buzzer rang, alerting the end of the game and seconds later Seth ran into the end zone, winning the game for the team. Everyone in the stands cheered so loudly and ran out on the field. This was a huge accomplishment for Seth and Edward.

I watched as Edward ran across the field, hugging Seth in an excited embrace. The entire team joined in on the excitement.

"I'm going to get the car," Garrett announced, rushing away as I started to breathe even heavier.

"I'll help," Emmett offered.

"We need to get Edward, now," I cried, through the pain.

"Oh right," Emmett said, stopping in his tracks. He turned toward the field. "Actually he's coming this way." I looked up and saw Edward running across the field towards the stands. "I'll get Seth instead." Emmett rushed down the stands, running right past Edward towards the crowd.

"Kate, will you call Leah?" I asked. "And Rose you need to call Alice and Jasper. Esme will you call Carlisle and tell him that we're coming?" I started giving out orders, which they all obeyed instantly, rushing to the sides for privacy. I wanted to tell Edward alone. I needed this to be us and no one else.

I was still sitting on the bleachers, breathing heavily and trying to fight through the contractions as he dashed up the stands. He looked so excited. I stood to my feet slowly, returning his smile as he wrapped me up in his arms.

"We won baby. I did it. I love this so much. I don't ever want to do anything else," he announced. He pulled away taking in the expression on my face.

"I'm glad. This is what I wanted for you. This is what you need," I divulged. "But Edward, I need you to take me to the hospital now." His face went blank, the excitement and happiness exchanged for fear and worry. I smiled up at him and placed my hand on his cheek. "Edward, I need you to be strong. You're about to become a dad and I need you." He snapped out of his blank expression, shaking his head a few times.

"Right," he announced. He quickly wrapped his arm around my shoulders supporting me down the stands to the parking lot. Everyone else followed behind.

Garrett had the police car ready for us to jump into. Kate jumped in the front seat with Garrett while Edward and Esme helped me into the back seat.

"We'll be right behind you," Rose announced, just as Seth and Emmett came running up. I nodded my head, while gritting my teeth and closing my eyes tightly.

Garrett put the siren on and skidded out of the parking lot as fast as he could.

"It's going to be okay baby, we'll get there soon," Edward comforted. I grabbed on to his shirt, balling it up in my hands, trying to hide the pain.

"Just stay with me. Don't leave my side," I begged of him.

"I never will, Bella."

I closed my eyes and gritted my teeth fighting the pain.

"How long has she been like this?" Edward asked. Kate turned around from the front to see how I was doing.

"She started having contractions about the last quarter of the game, but she said she's been having mild pain all day," Esme answered.

"Then why didn't anyone come and get me?"

"I wouldn't let them," I whispered. "I didn't want to take the game away from you."

"Bella…" he scolded.

"Don't… I'm fine. It didn't get bad until right at the end. Don't worry about it," I tried to reassure. He sighed heavily, running his hand through his hair in frustration.

We got to the hospital in no time at all, thanks to the siren. Carlisle was standing there with my obstetrician, Dr. Snow, at the front entrance, waiting for us when we pulled up.

Garrett jumped out, opening the doors for us.

"How we doing, Bella," Dr. Snow asked, sticking his head in the door. I mumbled something unintelligible and he chuckled under his breath. He helped me out of the car, placing me in the wheelchair. He wheeled me up to a room with all of my family following close behind. Edward never once left my side.

The nurse came in and helped me get all set up and on the bed. The contractions were coming so fast and so hard, I literally couldn't breathe.

"Are you okay? Do you want me to get you anything," Edward asked nervously.

"No," I whined, through the contractions.

"Alright Bella, I'm going to have a quick look and see how you're doing. Then we'll get you some pain medication," Dr. Snow informed. He checked to see how dilated I was. I watched his face as he did this, and noticed he got a peculiar look. He checked the monitors, and then asked the nurse to bring in the ultrasound machine.

"Is something wrong?" Edward asked.

"I'm sure everything is fine," Dr. Snow answered, not giving me or Edward any relief.

Dr. Snow quickly did an ultrasound and then looked at the monitor again, watching what happened every time I had a contraction.

"Dr. Snow what's wrong?" I asked, knowing that he was keeping something from me.

"Bella, I don't want you to panic but there seems to be a problem," he announced.

"What do you mean there's a problem?" Edward wondered, with an irritated yet worried voice.

Dr. Snow started ordering the nurses around, telling them to prepare the OR and to call in the pediatrician and specialists. Two nurses came rushing in and started pushing the bed I was lying on out of the room.

"What's going on," I cried.

"I'm afraid I need to bring you to the OR and get this baby out now. The heart rate is very low. Not even there at times. And your blood pressure is dropping rapidly. I'm not sure what the problem is, but you're going to need a C-section and I'm afraid we don't have time for an epidural. I'm going to need to put you under anesthesia," he informed. "I'm sorry. I know this isn't what you wanted to hear, but it's the only option to ensure both you and the baby's life."

"Edward," I bawled, reaching for his hand as I was pushed down the hall.

"It's okay," he reassured, grabbing my hand and holding it tightly. "I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere."

When we reached the operating room Dr. Snow stopped Edward.

"I'm really sorry, but you can't come in right now. The nurse will show you where you can wait and as soon as we know what's going on we'll call for you."

"No," I wailed. I squeezed his hand tighter, not willing to let him go. I needed him to be with me.

"Baby, it'll be okay. I'm not going far and I'll be right here when you wake up. I promise." I could see the fear in his face. The same fear I was feeling. "I love you," he whispered close to my ear before kissing me gently on the cheek.

The bed started to move into the room and I reluctantly let go of Edward's hand. "I love you too," I mumbled. As the doors shut I could see the tears forming in his eyes. He was trying so hard to hold it together.

His tears only gave me more fear and anxiety. The nurses and doctors were swarming around me and hooking me up to all kinds of tubes and machines. It was scary not knowing what they were doing or whether the baby or I would survive. No one would tell me anything.

Within minutes of entering the room a mask was put over my face for oxygen and seconds later I was out. The last thought I had, was of my mother. I wished so bad that she was here. She would have known how to make me relax.

**EPOV**

The second her hand left mine, I lost it. I broke down sobbing. I was struggling just to breathe. I didn't know what was happening. Nobody would tell me anything. I didn't know whether it was the baby or if it was Bella. All I knew was that whatever was happening wasn't good and there was nothing I could do.

"Edward," my dad called down the hall.

"Dad, what's going on?" I cried, rushing down the hall to meet him half way. "They aren't telling me much. I can't even be in there with her. Please just tell me that she's going to be okay."

He placed a hand on my shoulder squeezing gently. "Everything will be fine. Dr. Snow is a great doctor and he'll take good care of both of them. Why don't you come with me and you can sit with mom and everyone else," he suggested.

"No! I can't! They said they would come and get me as soon as they knew anything. I'm not leaving here until I know she's okay."

I listened to him sigh in defeat, knowing there was no use in trying to argue with me. He nodded his head and led me back down the hall to the OR. We sat down in the chairs placed nearby. My head fell into my hands in frustration and agony. I knew something was wrong. I wanted to be in that room with her. I wanted to know that she was going to make it. I wanted to know that our baby that we had tried so long for was going to be okay. If something happened to the baby I knew it would kill Bella. She wanted this so bad. She had been dying to be a mom since that first year we were married.

Shortly after we sat down, my mom and Kate came rushing down the hall. "What's going on?" Kate asked in a frightened tone. I jumped to my feet coming face to face with both of them.

"Why didn't you get me? Why didn't anyone come tell me the second she started having contractions," I shouted. I was so angry that they just let her sit there in the stands having contractions and never came to tell me.

"She begged us not to Edward," my mom argued. "She wanted you to be able to finish the game and prove to the school board that you could handle being the coach. She didn't want to get in the way of your dream again. She loves you too much to think of herself before you."

"I don't care what the fuck she told you not to do. Do you think I give a fuck about football when she's in there? She's my wife and that's my child. I had a right to know. Now I don't know if either of them is going to survive and this all could have been prevented if you would have just come to get me," I yelled.

"Edward, calm down," my dad ordered, grabbing my shoulders to restrain me. I shrugged him off angrily.

"You should have come to get me," I sobbed. "I can't live without her and I don't know if she's going to survive. What if neither of them survives…?"

My mom reached out pulling me into a tight embrace. "Have faith son. You two have made it through enough to know that you can make it through this too. She's strong and you know that. She'll be fine."

I held on to my mom sobbing in her arms like I was a little boy again. This was my worst fear. This was harder than facing James or getting shot or not being able to play football. This was a nightmare.

Once I calmed myself and sat back down in the chair the only thing I could think about were all the things I should have said or done to show her how much she meant to me. To make her understand, that she was more important to me than anything else. I would give up everything for her. Football and coaching didn't mean anything to me without her.

My mom stayed right by my side rubbing my shoulders. We were all silent in our own thoughts and waiting for any news.

"Edward," a voice called. My head shot up, noticing a nurse standing by the operating room. She smiled when I jumped to my feet. "Would you like to meet your daughter?"

The blood rushed out of me. I stared at her confused by what she was saying. "Daughter?" We all questioned at once.

"Yes, your daughter," she giggled.

I followed her in the room and a nurse came over placing the baby in my arms. I stared down at her feeling every emotion all at once. Relief, fear, happiness, excitement, joy, anticipation… She was so beautiful and perfect. I never thought I could love someone as much as I loved Bella, but it only took a second for that love I felt for my daughter to explode inside of me.

"What about Bella? Is she okay?"

"She'll be fine. Dr. Snow is stitching her up now. She'll wake up from the anesthetic in a couple hours.

"And the baby, she's okay too?"

She smiled at me. "She's just fine. The cord was wrapped around her neck, blocking her oxygen and during every contraction it was making it tighter. But she's fine now and in perfect health. They both are."

I nodded my head. "Thank you," I said, relieved that my worries were unwarranted.

I once again looked at my daughter in my arms, smiling down at her as she slowly opened her eyes and wiggled her little fingers. "Can I take her out into the hallway so she can meet her grandparent's?"

"Of course you can. We'll be moving your wife to a recovery room here soon so we'll need you to follow behind with the baby. But for now its fine if you take her right outside the OR," the nurse explained.

I slowly walked out into the hallway seeing the excited and anxious faces of my parents and Kate.

They crowded around me looking down at her cooing and giggling at her tiny expressions.

"I can't believe she's a she," my dad gasped. All this time we were expecting a boy."

"I guess we'll be making lots of returns," my mom laughed.

"How's Bella doing?" Kate asked.

"She's fine from what they told me. The doctor is stitching her up now then they'll move her to a recovery room."

"So what are you naming her?" My dad asked.

"I have no idea," I laughed. "We were expecting a boy. We can't exactly name her Edward Junior now." They all laughed.

"Everyone is going to be so excited to hear the news," Kate announced. "They're all down stairs waiting to come up."

"As soon as they move her to a recovery room I'm sure visitors will be allowed," Carlisle informed.

We all stood there for so long just looking down at her and falling in love with this little baby that would forever change all of our lives.

Later that night Bella was moved to a room and I followed behind with my daughter in my arms. I wasn't willing to let her go or put her down. She already had her daddy wrapped around her little finger.

It was so odd hearing that. I was a dad and Bella was a mom. We were a family. Nothing in life could ever match this feeling of elation I had. This was heaven.

Once they got her set up in the recovery room, I sat down next to the bed, waiting for her to wake up.

"Edward," she whispered so softly, coming out of her sleep.

"I'm right here, Baby."

"Where is he? Where's my baby?" She slowly opened her eyes, searching all around for any sign of the baby.

"She's right here, Bella," I revealed the sleeping baby in my arms to her. "I haven't been able to put her down since they placed her in my arms. But I think she may want to see her mommy now."

"She…?" Bella repeated, confused.

I laughed lightly. "Yes, she," I answered. "Turns out the ultrasound got it wrong. We had a girl, not a boy." I gently placed the baby in her arms, letting go of her for the first time.

"She's so beautiful," Bella gasped.

I smiled. "She looks just like her mom."

Bella looked up, smiling in return and even blushing slightly. "I love you, Edward."

I leaned down, kissing her lips gently. I placed my forehead against hers, looking down at our daughter in my wife's arms. "I love you, too. More than you could ever imagine."

We sat there enjoying the little bubble we were in when there was a light knock on the door.

"Can we come in now?" My mom asked, poking her head through.

"Of course," Bella said, excitedly. Every family member filed through the door one by one. My parents, Emmett and Rose, Kate and Garrett, Seth, and right at the end Leah walked in with Alice and Jasper following.

Bella and I gaped at them both. It had been so long since either of us had seen them.

"You didn't honestly think we were going to miss this did you?" Alice wondered.

"But how?" Bella questioned, while Alice rushed over to give her a quick hug and see the baby.

"I knew you were due soon, so Jazz and I decided to take a trip home so we could be here. We got into Seattle late last night and were planning to come surprise you. Leah knew we were coming and planned to drive us in," Alice explained. "I guess this little one beat us to the surprise."

"I'm so happy both of you are here," Bella declared. "I've missed you both."

"Well, maybe you won't have to miss us anymore. We're thinking of staying," Alice announced.

"Really?" I questioned in disbelief.

"Yeah, I think we've travelled enough, so it's time to settle down. Maybe we'll even get married and start a family ourselves," Jasper suggested. I noticed Bella and Alice exchange a look of excitement. I'm sure it was because of what Jasper said. Bella had been telling me for years to tell Jasper that he needs to propose. But there was no telling Jasper to do anything. He did things on his schedule.

"It'd be good to have you back," I said to Jasper. "I've missed having my best friend and I may need someone to hang out with after being up all night with this little daddy's girl."

"What am I, chop liver?" Emmett shouted, playfully. Rose hit him across the chest.

"What was that for?" Emmett asked her, rubbing his chest.

"Stop being a baby," Rose demanded. We all started laughing at their antics.

"Congratulations Seth on winning the game," Bella said. "I'm sorry I wasn't able to celebrate with you properly." I rolled my eyes, letting out an irritated sigh. It didn't go unnoticed by Bella though.

"What was that about?" She asked me.

"You should have told me. I would have left the game, so we could make it to the hospital in time. None of this might have happened if we made it here sooner."

"I wanted you to finish the game. Those boys depend on you and I wasn't about to let you give up on this dream for me," she argued.

"When are you going to realize that nothing matters to me, but you?" I questioned.

"When you realize that you matter more to me than anything else also. Well, I guess until now," she added playfully, looking down at our daughter with so much love.

Seth laughed. "It's okay sis, I understand why you weren't there. But I do have some good news," he added. "After the game a scout who was watching, came over to me and said he wanted to talk about my future plans. He gave me his card and said he'd be in touch soon."

"Are you serious?" I asked, excitedly. Seth nodded his head with a huge grin on his face.

"That's great news, Seth," Garrett and Emmett said almost simultaneously.

"This is amazing news," I added. "I'm so happy for you."

"I couldn't have done it without all of you," Seth said.

"So can I ask the question we're all wondering?" Leah divulged.

"What's that Leah?" Bella asked.

"What's her name?"

I glanced back at Bella, seeing her look perplexed by the question. "Did you have anything in mind?" I asked her. She looked back down at the sleeping baby in her arms and smiled.

"Yeah, I do." She raised her eyes back to mine. "Renee," she announced, "after my mom."

One corner of my lip curved up into a smile. "I think that's a perfect name."

"I agree," Kate added, smiling.

"Welcome to the family Renee," my dad greeted. She started to wake, yawning and stretching her little limbs. Everyone awed and cooed at her.

"May I hold her now?" my mom asked, hesitantly.

"Of course you can," Bella agreed. She moved to the side of the bed, lifting Renee from Bella's arms. My mom had tears forming in her eyes as she held her grandchild close.

"You little one, have made me the happiest woman alive," she whispered. "Your namesake can't be here, but I'll make up for that. It's my job to love you twice as much for both of us."

I watched as Renee was passed around to everyone in the room. They all loved her instantly. She was definitely going to be the most spoiled child ever.

Bella slipped her hand into mine, linking our fingers together. I glanced back at her, squeezing her hand gently. She smiled at me with so much love in her face. All this time, I still loved her more than anything. She was everything to me and always would be.

I leaned down, giving her a quick kiss on the lips and brushing the matted hair out of her face.

"Thank you for loving me," she whispered.

"Thank you for allowing me to love you and for loving me in return." I kissed her again more passionately and fully, knowing that our family would probably be so focused on Renee that we could have this small intimate moment together.

"So, uh… are you two thinking of making baby number two already?" Emmett joked. I broke the kiss rolling my eyes. Bella's cheeks turned a dark pink.

"Maybe we should give them some private time," Garrett suggested. He was currently the one holding Renee, so he came over placing her back in Bella's arms. Everyone wished us a good night and said they'd be back in the morning.

Once we were alone, I turned my attention back on Bella. She was looking down on our little girl, brushing her fingers across her little face.

"Is it even possible to love someone so much?" She asked, not taking her eyes off of Renee. I smiled looking back and forth between both of my girls.

"Yes," I whispered, kissing her gently on the forehead. I laid my head down on the pillow next to her looking down at the beautiful piece of heaven we were given and knowing nothing would ever be better than this.

**And They All Lived Happily Ever After :)**

**The End**

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**Thanks for taking the time to read this story, I hope everyone enjoyed it. I know parts were hard to get through, but they were just as hard to write, so thank you again for being so supportive. **

**I have to tell Bzeemomof4 and Redlulu thank you so much for sticking with me through this story and always being such amazing supports and betas. I am truly blessed to be able to call you both friends. You both are wonderful people that I'm so glad I met through this crazy fandom. **

**Again don't forget to check out the playlist on youtube for this story that was put together by another amazing person that goes by caritochaves on twitter. I can't tell how much that meant to me when you sent me the link. It seriously made my day. The link is on my profile. **

**Also I wanted to tell Kstew411 thank you for recommending my story to your followers, it was so unexpected and honestly a little intimidating. But I'm so happy you did and very appreciative that you took the time to do that for my story. **

**As for all the readers, I wanted to tell all of you one last time thank you for reading and sticking with my story to the end. You can't imagine how happy I get every time I see a new review or that someone has added it to favorites or alerts. **

**Alright I know not many people read the A/N's anyway so I'll shut up. But just know that all the support and love I've gotten on this story is truly appreciated and very humbling.**

**Thank you again.**


	29. Futureshot because I had to

**A/N: I know everyone is probably saying "What the fuck" right about now. This story is finished and has been for a very long time, I shouldn't be adding more, right? Well, I've been harassed by a certain reader for months to write more of this and give Bella more babies. I didn't think I could because like I said, this story is done. But, I fought through the writer's block on this story for the last six months and was able to write something. It might not be exactly what this certain reader wanted but I did it so she better be happy. I sure hope everyone else is happy also. **

**I, in way, intended for this to be the end of the story but since "some" readers weren't satisfied I added more. I hope it doesn't ruin the story for everyone.**

**Just so everyone knows, the song choices for this song and the names of at least two of the kids are all dedication to this specific reader who wanted more. Monday was her birthday so this was her birthday present. She has already read it and given her stamp of approval.**

**Thanks to all the readers who came back after all this time to read what I came up with next, and thanks to any and all new readers who happened to come across this story recently. I know it's not the best written story since it was my first ever story, but I think I've grown as a writer over the last couple of years and gotten a lot better.**

**Thank you to Astonmartin823 who beta'd this story at last minute. I'm sorry I'm such a procrastinator and can't get things done in plenty of time to be beta'd lol. But I'm glad I have such amazing betas who are always willing to look over my stuff at the last minute.**

**And finally thank you to cherieblossum–you know why ;) **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters involved. No copyright infringement intended.**

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**Changing Colours: Great Lake Swimmers**

**Heart and Bones: The Pines**

Edward and I have been going strong for nearly twenty-two years now. We've had our ups and downs but for the most part we've had the time of our lives spending everyday together, helping each other learn and grow, and of course watching our daughter, Renee, grow into a beautiful little girl.

She just turned eleven years old and has just recently started middle school. She's extremely well-rounded and so smart. She amazes everyone with how smart she is. She's our entire world and has everyone wrapped around her little finger.

Edward and I tried for a long time to have another child, but it never worked out. We both wanted a large family, and we felt like our house was empty without more children. We loved Renee, she was our world, but we always hoped she would have brothers and sisters to grow up with. I know it really upset Edward that he didn't have a son to carry on his family name, but he never let on that it did. As his wife and constant companion I could tell, though. If I ever did bring it up he would always tell me we didn't need any more kids. Renee was all we needed and the boys on the football field everyday were his sons. Edward molded those boys not only into football players but men who everyone in our small town was proud to have as a role model.

Edward was amazing as a mentor and coach but even more so as a father. I couldn't ask for more from a man. Not only did he save me and my brother and sister from a life of hell and possible death, he also showed me how to love myself and have confidence in my abilities as a mother and as a wife. I owed him everything. I wouldn't be the person I am today if it wasn't for him. I probably wouldn't even be alive if it wasn't for his sacrifice to keep me safe.

"Mom, we have to go. I'm going to be late… again," Renee whined, while she stood by the front door with her purple backpack draped across her shoulder.

"I'm coming, I'm coming," I assured, rushing around the kitchen to grab our lunches, my keys, and my purse. I always ran late in the mornings. It's a totally different aspect from when I was a teenager. Living with James, I would have never been running late. I would have been punished if I was late. Now though, I think sometimes I like to be a little late for things just to remind myself I have the freedom to do so. I won't be beaten if I'm late or forget to do something before I leave. I like having that freedom. Although, I think Renee gets a little upset since she does get in trouble from her teacher for being late and usually has to stay in for her recess or write sentences. I never understood why the teachers take out tardiness on the students –especially grade school and middle school children. It's not like they have any control over their parents being late to drop them off. If they can drive themselves then I'd say it's a different story.

Edward had already left early to get some work done for the upcoming football game before his students came in for his history class. He loved being a teacher, but he loved being a coach even more. He found every free moment he could to prepare for games. During football season, I barely saw him. Once football season was over though, he would turn back into the father and husband Renee and I knew. It was a small sacrifice we endured for Edward to live his dream.

Renee and I ran out to the car and quickly headed out on the road towards the school. We were both silent while I drove. She seemed to have a lot on her mind for some reason. It wasn't like her to be so quiet. Most of the time, she was very chatty and told me everything, but not so much anymore. I wanted to ask her what was wrong but instead I remained quiet giving her the space she needed.

I went back to work as a full-time school nurse at the middle school when Renee started school. With Renee in middle school now, I was able to spend almost every lunch period with her and see her around the school every day. I was always able to work my schedule around her so she was never alone and never with a babysitter other than the occasional date night Edward and I had where she would stay with her grandparents, Carlisle and Esme, or her Aunt Rose and Uncle Emmett, or even once in a while her Aunt Kate and Uncle Garrett. Her favorite person to spend time with though, was her Uncle Seth. She loved him from day one. Seth moved to California for school years ago and never came back home. He met the love of his live, Marissa, in college, and stayed there to be with her. They come to visit occasionally but not as often as we'd like.

Leah comes home at least once a month. She has yet to marry; her love is only for the animals she works with on a daily basis at the zoo. But, she's happy and that's all I could ask for with her and with Seth. They were spared most of the physical abuse I endured, although, abuse comes in many forms. They were both scarred mentally and emotionally from what we went though. Over time with counseling we all were able to heal from our ordeal and move forward. That's what our counselor strived for –to move forward. We did our best and took one day at a time.

Maybe spending so much time with Renee and wanting to protect her from all the evil in the world was beginning to smother her and she needed some space. She was getting older and needed to have just a little freedom –not too much but a little. I didn't need to pry into whatever it was bothering her. She knew she could talk to me if she needed to.

When we pulled into the parking lot of the school all the stragglers were running towards the building to make it in time before the bell. Renee hopped out of the car and ran, not even saying goodbye or giving me a hug and kiss. It sort of ripped my heart out when she didn't, but I had to start getting used to it eventually. She was growing up.

At lunchtime she didn't come to the health office like she normally did, which made me wonder if something was really wrong. I walked down to the lunchroom and saw her sitting with a group of friends laughing and talking care freely. Once again it broke my heart, but I had to let it go. It was healthy for her to have friends and want to spend time with them.

That night, Renee and I went out to dinner, just the two of us, since I knew Edward was going to be extremely late from football practice. I wanted some time to spend with Renee like we used to.

"Who were those girls you were eating lunch with today?" I asked her while popping a french fry in my mouth.

She shrugged her shoulders and picked up a fry off her plate. "Just some girls in my class," she answered nonchalantly. "They asked me and Pippa to sit with them today. I never get asked to sit with them so I was really excited about it –until they started to pick on Pippa. Then it wasn't much fun." Her eyes were sad while she twirled her fry in the ketchup.

"Who's Pippa?" I asked, not remembering ever hearing Renee talk about a friend named Pippa.

"She's a new girl in our school. She just started a few weeks ago. The kids pick on her a lot because she's quiet and she doesn't dress like all of us do. She's not from little old Forks though. She came from New York City like where Alice and Jasper live. She reminds me a lot of Alice. She's so nice and always wants to do things for me. I don't think it's very nice of those other girls to make fun of her."

"It's not nice. I'm very proud of you for befriending someone who is new to the area and probably needs a good friend right now after being moved so far away," I commended her. "Who are her parents? Do you know their names? I'd like to meet them and maybe set up a play date for you and Pippa."

"Mom," she grumbled. "We're not little kids anymore. We don't have play dates. We hang out and have sleepovers."

"Sorry," I apologized giggling a little at being corrected about the proper terminology for a preteen. "Why don't you ask her if she'd be free to spend the night this Friday night? Your daddy will be out of town for the night for a game so it'll just be us girls."

"Can I invite a couple people?" she asked looking up at me with an excited expression.

"Sure, just no more than five girls," I agreed with a few stipulations. "I don't think it would be a very good idea to invite those girls who were picking on Pippa, though."

"I'm not. I'm only going to invite three girls; Ashley, Kara, and Pippa. They're the only girls I'm really good friends with. Plus, this will make Amber and Courtney jealous."

"Renee," I scolded with a stern face. I didn't like her thinking it was okay to make other girls feel bad despite how much they may have deserved it.

"Well, they deserve it," she excused. "You should have heard what they were saying about Pippa. She was even in the bathroom crying for a while. She tried to be strong and not let it get to her, but it did. I wanted to punch Courtney for the mean comments she was saying."

"Did you tell a teacher what happened?" I wondered.

"No," her head dropped in shame for not saying anything.

"You need to the next time it happens. The worst thing you can do as a friend is not speak up. I know it's not the "cool thing" to do but words can hurt especially for someone who's new and doesn't have many friends."

"I know, Mom. That's why I tried to be friends with her on her first day. She looked so scared and sad. I had to do something."

I reached my arm across the table and cupped her face with my hand. "I'm so proud to call you my daughter. You're truly one of a kind."

She smiled and ducked her head almost as if she was embarrassed of my comment. I pulled my hand back and gestured towards her food so we could finish up. I wanted to get home in time for Renee to get her homework done and possibly have a little time to myself. I still loved to read and tried to get in as much reading in as I could. Being a mom, a wife, and a school nurse left little free time.

Edward didn't make it home until almost ten o'clock at night. It was typical but still hard. Renee was already asleep and probably wouldn't see him in the morning either.

"You look exhausted," I told him, looking him over and seeing his disheveled clothing and hair, dark circles under his eyes, and slightly sun-burned face. He dropped his stuff on the couch and walked over to me. He leaned down giving me a quick kiss before plopping down next to me.

"Today was not a very good day," he whined.

"What happened?"

"There's this new kid at the school," he began. "His name is Foxworth and he tried out for the team last week. Tonight was his first practice with the team."

"Is he not very good?" I wondered.

"No, that's not it at all," he corrected. "He's actually very good. He's one of those players coaches dream of, but his attitude stinks. He's can't seem to control his anger. I had to break up two fist fights tonight and eventually had to bench him to get him to calm down. I don't know if I can even use him at the game this weekend because of how he's behaving. I'm about ready to kick him off the team."

Knowing Edward the way I did, he very rarely kicked anyone off the team or turned anyone down who tried out. He would always find something for them to do and mold them into football players even if they weren't so great in the beginning. He was a firm believer anyone could do anything if they wanted it bad enough and had the proper help to achieve it. Hearing him say he was thinking of kicking him off the team was a little shocking.

"I'm sure in time he'll get better. He's probably still trying to find his place not only on the team but in school and even in this tight-knit community. It's hard to fit in when you move to a small town like Forks," I encouraged.

"You're probably right," he agreed, running his fingers through his hair making it more of a mess than it already was. "I just want to take a shower, eat something, and make love to my wife." He leaned into my neck and began kissing along my jaw line with a small moan escaping his lips.

I smiled at hearing his comment and was quite pleased he wanted to make love to me. "Why don't you take a shower and I'll make something up for you to eat?"

He grumbled into my neck and moved back. "Alright." He stood to his feet and headed off towards our bedroom to take a shower. I walked to the kitchen and made him up a sandwich with some chips and a glass of water, before taking it back to our bedroom and placing it on his nightstand. I changed into a slightly sexy nightgown and crawled into bed to continue to read for a little bit. I assumed he would finish his shower then want to eat. However, when he came out of the bedroom he crawled onto the bed and while pulling the strap of my nightgown down and gently kissing my skin, he pulled the book from my hand and dropped it on the floor. I smiled and closed my eyes enjoying the flutter of excitement his touch still gave me after all these years.

"I would really like to make love to my wife now," he mumbled against my skin.

I grabbed his face and brought his lips to mine, kissing him with as much passion and desire as I could. "Your wife would like nothing more than to make love to you," I whispered against his lips after I kissed him. He felt him smirk against my lips before kissing me further. He adjusted himself on the bed, crawling over top of me. He clumsily pulled the hem of my nightgown up over my head and threw it on the floor.

"I don't know why you bother wearing those things. I always end up removing them," he complained. "Besides, I like your naked body so much more than adorned with frilly lingerie."

"You never minded it when we were teenagers," I reminded in a teasing voice. He rested on his hands staring down at my face.

"When we were teenagers I was horny. Everything turned me on. Now that I'm older and wiser, I've come to admire your naked body and want to worship how perfect it is." His tongue dragged across my chest until it reached my breast where he swirled it around my nipple and sucked it between his wet, warm lips. His arousal was apparent when he dropped his hips against me and pressed gently into me.

"You know I've come to admire your naked body over the years as well and these sweatpants you have on are not working for me," I pointed out, tugging on the pants to pull them off.

He chuckled against my breast, never removing his lips and helped me pull them down his legs to kick them off. I moaned appreciatively at feeling his bare skin against mine. I traced the contours of his stomach with my fingers until they reached his cock. I took him in my hand and slowly pumped my hand back and forth. He gently bit down on my nipple and let out a struggled groan. I grinned happily, knowing after all these years I could still make him feel good. After gliding my hand up and down his shaft a few times, he sat up on his knees and looked down at my sprawled out body before him with a huge grin on his face.

"Do you have any idea how good it feels to have your hand wrapped around my cock? God, the things you do to me after all these years…" he trailed off, leaning back down and kissing down my stomach and legs. His fingers trailed across my slit causing me to slightly press into his hand in anticipation. Two fingers pressed into me slowly and precisely, pumping and gliding in and out. I let a loud moan escape my lips as my body writhed and tightened around his fingers. My mouth hung open letting my erratic breath escape freely.

"Mmm, you are so beautiful when you come for me. I could watch you all day," he whispered while he watched me. His fingers twisted and turned inside of me forcing me to the edge of an orgasm. My eyes closed and my entire body tightened from the tingles that rushed through me from head to toe. I wanted to scream out in ecstasy as he pulled his fingers out and pulled one leg up over his shoulder. He looked at me with a seductive expression and dropped his head between my legs licking up and down my slit and nibbling my clit between his lips. "You still taste like cinnamon. I will always love the taste of cinnamon."

My legs fell to the side opening up as far as I could while he brought me to yet another orgasm even stronger than the first. Before I finished, he pulled his lips away causing me to whimper in need to have his mouth back on me. I didn't have to wait long though. He lined his cock up with my slit and gently pushed his way in. He still tried to be so gentle with me and never be rough even though I almost enjoyed the rough, raw sensation of sex. Usually after a few minutes of the slow, sensual, pace, he would always end up going fast and hard. I always got very vocal when he did, letting him know how much I enjoyed it and wanted more.

"You're so good to me," I breathed, dragging my lips across his chest. "God, Edward, go deep and make me come harder than I ever have before. Let me give you the best pleasure you've ever experienced."

My words aroused him even more causing him to moan and speed up his tempo. Within moments his face was scrunched together and beads of sweat formed on his brow. "Yes, Baby. Yes," I cried as my orgasm took over my body. He let out a long and very loud moan as he filled me as deep as he could and released inside of me. I smiled and let out a pleased sigh.

"God, I can't believe after all this time you still make me turn into a horny teenager, who wants nothing more than to make you feel good and have a little fun myself while doing it." His eyebrows waggled and a smirk formed across his face.

"You always act like a horny teenager," I teased.

"You love it though. I know how to make my girl happy," he pointed.

I smiled and wrapped my arms around his neck pulling myself up to his level. "That you do know how to do very well," I assured.

He looked into my eyes with so much love and joy expressed across his face. "I love you," he said as if it was his last chance to say it. His tone kind of scared me with the way his eyes bore into mine and his expression was unmoving. "I love you more and more every day I'm married to you. Asking you to go to that stupid dance all those years ago was the probably the best decision I've ever made, other than asking you to marry in front of nearly the whole town." He chuckled, breaking the seriousness of his expression. "I just don't want you to ever forget how much I love you and how much I will support you in everything you ever do."

I leaned up and kissed him on the nose with a smile on my face. "I love you too. I always will. But you almost sound like you're saying goodbye. Is everything okay?" I asked beginning to worry something might be wrong.

He rolled over to his side of the bed and chuckled lightly. "Nothing is wrong," he assured. "I just don't want you to ever feel like I'm taking you for granted or that I've forgotten why I fell in love with you. I'd go back and do all over again if I had to. I'd probably try to make some better choices. Like for one, I would have never let you live with that monster for as long as you did."

I sighed and crawled off the bed to pick my nightgown off the floor and slip it back on. "I don't want to talk about the past right now," I said in an insecure voice. Even after all this time just the thought of James sent me into a panic and fearful state of mind. Edward knew this, but he always thought it was good for me to talk about it; to face my fears and my insecurities. My counselor said the same thing. I wanted to just forget it ever happened and move on with the life I had now. I didn't want to face my fears. I wanted to ignore them and pretend nothing was ever wrong. Deep down I knew he was gone and there was no possible way for him to ever hurt me again, but it didn't matter. He still hurt me mentally on a daily basis. I could never truly get away from him.

Edward walked up behind me and wrapped his arms around my stomach, leaning in and gently kissing my neck. "I'm sorry."

I patted his arm and forced a smile while leaning into him. "It's okay. I think I'm going to get some sleep now. You should eat and get some sleep yourself." I pulled out of his arms and walked back over to the bed. I quickly fixed the sheets and crawled into bed turning to my side and closing my eyes. After a few moments I felt Edward sit down on the other side of the bed and eat his sandwich. When he was done he flipped the light off and curled up behind me wrapping his arm around me and pulling me back into him.

"I won't ever let anything hurt you. I promise," he whispered next to my ear. I didn't say anything in return. I just leaned back into him and took his hand in mine, which was placed against my stomach. It was my silent way of letting him know I believed him and forgave him for bringing James up. I could never stay mad at Edward for any reason.

The following day was much like any other day. Edward left early, I was running late, and Renee was frustrated because I was taking so long. It was a typical day in the Cullen household, yet for some reason it felt off. I ignored the intuition that told me something was wrong all day long while I worked.

While on my lunch break, Renee showed up in my office unexpected looking upset. I quickly rushed to her side and held her in my arms. "What happened?" I asked as she cried in my arms.

"My friend Pippa said she can't come over for a sleepover because her mom won't let her," she answered through her sobs.

"Did she even ask her mom?" I wondered.

"No, she said she can't ask because she knows her mom will say no. I tried to convince her to at least try and she got mad at me. She said if I didn't drop it then she wouldn't be my friend anymore. Then she stormed off and left me alone at lunchtime."

"Maybe she's not such a good friend if she's going to get upset at you for just asking her to spend the night at your house," I theorized.

"She doesn't have any other friends. I want to be her friend but every time I try to get close to her she gets mad at me and won't talk to me anymore," she explained further. A flood of memories filled my mind of what I did to Alice growing up. I had done the same exact thing to her for years when I lived with James. I tried to avoid her requests to do things with her and when Alice wouldn't accept my answer I would get upset and turn it around on her.

My heart was racing from fear and anger, but I had to stay cool for Renee's sake. I sat her down and looked at her as calmly as possible. I did not want to scare my child unnecessarily.

"Renee, how much do you know about Pippa?" I questioned.

"What do you mean?" she asked, wiping her tears away and staring at me peculiarly.

"Do you know where she came from before she moved here? Do you know who her parents are? Does she have any siblings? Is she a really good student or does she struggle?"

"Mom, why are you asking all these questions?"

"I just need to know what exactly is going on so I can help her," I explained.

"Help her how? What do you think is wrong with her?" she wondered.

"Just answer the questions, Renee," I ordered. "Do you know anything about her personal life what-so-ever?"

She thought about for a moment and sighed heavily at the interrogation. "I don't know. She doesn't talk about herself much. She's kind of quiet and doesn't like people to know much about her."

"Have you told her stuff about yourself?" I asked.

"Of course I have," she answered. "She knows you're my mom and I've talked about Uncle Seth and Aunt Leah and Uncle Emmett and Aunt Rose. I've even told her about Grandpa Carlisle, Grandma Esme, Uncle Garrett and Aunt Kate. I told her about Grandma Renee and how I was named after her also."

"But she's never said anything about her family?" I asked again.

"No, not that I can remember," she replied. "Why, Mom?"

"Nothing, Sweetie," I said patting her shoulder and smiling sweetly at her. "I'm sure everything will be fine in a couple days. Why don't you get to class before you're late?" She swiped at her eyes again and stood to her feet. I gave her one last hug and sent her on her way.

I didn't know what to do first. Should I call the cops? Should I question Pippa? She would lie to me regardless. I should at least try to get some information from her. I could do it in a non-threatening way. I walked the short distance to the secretary's desk and asked Peggy to call Pippa to the office. Peggy looked at me strangely as if she thought I was a crazy person but she did as I asked.

I waited in the hallway next to the office for Pippa to come. As soon as I saw her slowly and nervously walking down the hall towards me, I smiled and walked towards her to meet her halfway. I took in her appearance first. She was clean and had her dark, long hair down over her shoulders. Her eyes did look a little bloodshot and there were dark circles under her eyes like she hadn't slept much. She had long pants and a long sleeve shirt on, with a hoodie over it and the tattered sleeves pulled down over her hands. It wasn't entirely out of the ordinary with the kids here but to someone who may be abused at home it was one of the first signs. I was her. "Hi Pippa. I would appreciate it if you would follow me to my office."

"Wasn't I called to the office?" she asked.

"I had you called to the office," I admitted.

I placed my hand on her back and guided her into my office.

"Am I in trouble?" she asked.

"Why would you be in trouble?" I countered with a giggle.

"You're Renee's mom. I wasn't very nice to her earlier," she admitted. "Did she tell you?"

"She did talk to me a little during lunch. But that's not why I called you to my office." I grabbed a file from my drawer just to make it look like this was school related. "There's some missing information on your file and I was hoping you might be able to help me fill it in."

"Oh, okay."

I sat down across from her and opened up the file to pretend to be filling in some information but really I was just taking notes about what she said. "It's rather warm in here. Why don't you take off your sweatshirt?" I suggested.

"No, I'm fine," she quickly refused pulling her sleeves over her hands. While she did this I noticed a shadow of a bruise on her wrist just before she covered it up.

I nodded my head and smiled trying to not let on what I saw on her wrist or what I suspected. "What are your mom and dad's names?"

"Catherine is my mom. My dad died about a year ago," she answered.

"Do you have a stepdad or does your mom have a boyfriend?"

"No, it's just my mom." I wrote down the information on the paper in front of me.

"What about brothers or sisters?"

"I have two brothers," she said.

"Do they go to school here?"

"No, Foxworth is in high school and Spencer is only a baby."

"Really? How old is he?" I asked pretending to be excited about hearing of a baby.

"I think he's a little over a year old. He starting to crawl now, which isn't always a good thing," she added.

"How so?" I asked with a curious friendly voice.

"Well, he gets into everything now. My mom can't watch him. He always ends up falling and getting hurt."

"Little babies just learning how to crawl do that a lot," I said with a smile.

"I have to be there to help so Spencer doesn't get too hurt," she said.

"Do you help out with your little brother a lot?" I asked.

"Yep, and Foxworth does too, but he's playing football this year so I have to do more."

"That's right, I remember my husband mentioning him last night. My husband, Edward, is the coach, so I hear all about the players." I remembered Edward telling me he had a temper and was in two fist fights. Maybe this little girl was being abused by her older brother and not her parents.

"Foxworth mentioned him."

"Does your mom work a lot is that why you have to help out so much?" I asked changing the subject back to her.

"No, she's home all day. We used to have a lot of money when my dad was still alive, but after he died we didn't have as much. That's why we moved here."

"Do you have family in the area?"

"No."

"Then why Forks of all places?" I wondered.

"I don't know. I guess it was the best hiding place."

"Hiding place?" I repeated, questioning why they needed a hiding place.

"Nothing. Mom just likes to play games," she quickly excused.

I put the file aside and leaned in close to her. "Pippa, if there's something going on at home then you can talk to me or even Renee if you want. We're here to help and to be your friend," I offered.

"I'm fine," she assured standing up and taking a couple steps back in a protective manner. "Am I done?" I recognized the behavior. When you think someone is getting too close and knows too much you shut down and try to get away as fast as possible. I nodded my head and gave her a pass to go back to class with.

As soon as she was gone I went into action and started writing up what I knew so far and even started looking through her school records to get some more information. As soon as school was over for the day, I asked the secretary, Peggie, to watch Renee for a couple hours while I went to an appointment. She was happy to oblige since she also had a daughter and we traded off when we needed someone to watch our children.

I knew I should have went straight to the police with my founding's or even to child services, but once again those fears got to me. I couldn't face the police just like I couldn't when I was a teenager. They wouldn't believe me or take me serious without someone else to back up my story. I needed help. I needed Edward.

I pulled up next to the football field and ran out on the field where he was. He saw me coming and instantly started asking where Renee was and if she was okay. I assured him she was fine and with Peggy. Once his anxiety settled, he asked his assistant coach to take over for a few minutes while we talked.

We walked a short distance away and he faced me with a questioning look. "What's going on, Bella? Why are you here?"

"Which one of these boys is Foxworth?" I asked. He furrowed his brow and raised the corner of his lip but pointed out the boy despite his confusion. I looked over at the bench where a group of boys sat and one boy at the far end with dark, shaggy hair and a scowl on his face.

"Why do you want to know who Foxworth is?" Edward asked.

"I think Renee's new friend, Pippa, might be being abused and I think it might be at the hand of her brother, Foxworth."

"What?" he asked chuckling in disbelief of my accusation. "Bella, what brought this on?"

"Something happened at school today with Renee and Pippa. While Renee was telling me about it a lot of similarities to my own childhood started to come out. I talked to Pippa and she told me Foxworth was her brother. She doesn't have a dad or a father figure at all. And last night you were telling me how Foxworth has a temper and gets in fights all of the time. What if he loses his temper with his little sister or even his mom and baby brother?"

"That's a really strong accusation to make of a teenage boy," he said, looking at me like he didn't believe me. "I'm not excusing Foxworth's behavior, but deep down I think he's a pretty good kid. He's just trying to find his place here and sometimes for a boy in a new school that means getting in fights with your teammates to prove you're worthy of being part of the team."

"But what about Pippa? I really think she's being abused," I pressed on.

"Bella, you can't go around thinking the worse of everyone," he chided. "Not everyone lives the life you did. Just because there were a few similarities doesn't mean this girl is being abused like you were. She's new; maybe she doesn't want everyone to know everything about her. Maybe they move around a lot and she doesn't like to get too close to anyone because then it's harder to say goodbye. You can't keep living like this."

"Like what, Edward? A paranoid freak who can't let go of her past?" I asked angrily. "Well maybe if my husband would stop bringing it up at every chance he gets then I'd be able to forget about it."

I turned on my heel and walked hastily back to my car. Tears were on the verge of falling from my eyes from the anger, humility, and hurt I felt. Edward was supposed to believe me and stand by me through everything. Now, when I needed him the most he was treating me like a stupid kid who didn't know what I was talking about.

I was so upset, I drove straight home and called to see if Peggie could bring Renee home. I knew I was right. I just had a gut feeling about this and I wasn't about to back down. I was going to help that little girl if it was the last thing I did.

I continued to probe Renee for more information as nonchalantly as I possibly could, but unsurprisingly she knew very little.

Edward came home early and walked into the kitchen where Renee and I were with a remorseful expression. Renee hopped up from the table and threw her arms around him welcoming him home.

"I need to talk to your mom for a minute. Can you go upstairs and do your homework up there until dinner is done?" he asked Renee.

"Sure, Daddy." Edward placed her back on her feet and she gathered up her books before heading upstairs. I ignored Edward while I focused on chopping the carrots in front of me.

"Bella," he began in a soft voice. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you upset. I just think you're making a mole hill out of nothing. You don't know anything about these people or their life."

"How much did you know about me when you figured out what was happening to me?" I asked whipping my body around and holding the knife out in front of us. His eyes focused in on the knife and slowly removed it from my hand, placing it on the cutting board behind me.

"I didn't know much but I did talk to James for a small moment and I knew something was off with him. I heard him push you and your cries. I had proof other than you didn't like to talk about your personal life." He sat down in a chair running his fingers through his hair in frustration. "I know you want to protect Renee from friends who might not be the greatest friends…"

"This has nothing to do with Renee," I shouted. "This is about that little girl. I know I'm right." He sighed heavily and shook his head. "What happened to you supporting me in everything I do?"

His head shot up to look me in the eyes. In an instant he was in front of me holding me in his arms. "I want to believe you, Bella. I do. I just don't want you to get in trouble for wrongly accusing someone of something, especially when it's one of my players."

I shoved him away and placed my hands on my hips. "That's why you won't believe me? Because it's one of your players who I'm accusing of hurting that little girl? Are you seriously going to sit here and tell me you're going to protect him just because he's on the team and you need him to win?"

"Bella, stop!" he ordered with a loud voice. "That's not what I'm saying at all."

"Then what are you saying?" I asked in the same raised voice as he had.

"Why are you fighting?" Renee's small, timid voice asked from around the corner. I turned away unwilling to let my daughter see how upset I was.

"Nothing, Honey," Edward assured walking over to her and hugging her tightly in is arms. I watched as she hugged him back and a single tear fell down her cheek. "We were only having a disagreement. There's nothing to be worried about. Everything is fine."

"Mommy?" she asked.

"Your dad's right. Everything is fine," I agreed, trying to give her reassurance. Edward and I never argued about anything. If we ever did have a disagreement one of us would always give in. This was the one time I wasn't willing to give in. "Dinner is about done. Go get washed up and we can eat."

Renee left the room again leaving us alone. "Bella, I'll talk to Foxworth and see what he has to say. Alright?"

"Okay," I accepted. I knew it was Edward's way of giving in since I wasn't but I also knew it was a fight I was going to have to fight on my own. I had to find out the truth about this little girl.

Edward and I didn't talk much for the rest of the night. We were very cold towards each other and acted as strangers instead a married couple. I just wanted him to believe me and trust my instincts.

The next day I texted Edward obsessively, wondering if he'd talked to Foxworth yet. I wanted to know what he had to say and how exactly he was covering up what he was doing to his little sister. Unfortunately, Edward kept putting me off and using every excuse possible why he hadn't talked to Foxworth. I was furious with Edward. Deep down I knew the only reason he wasn't talking to him or willing to stand by my claim and make a report was because he wanted this kid to be on the football team. Edward had his priorities backwards and I wasn't about to sit by and wait for him to make a decision.

I decided to take matters into my own hands since Edward wouldn't. During my lunch hour I decided to go talk to their mom. Maybe I'd be able to get some answers from her. I knew it was highly unprofessional for me to show up at a parent's home unannounced, but I had to know. I couldn't, in good conscience, just let this keep going if Pippa was being hurt.

I walked up to the door and knocked. I waited and waited but got no answer. Thinking about it, I realized it was kind of silly on my part to drive all the way over here in the middle of the day.

I sighed, shaking my head at my stupidity as I began to walk back towards my car. Just as I took a couple steps off the porch, I heard the door creak open. I turned around to see a ghastly woman standing in the doorway. She was skinny, her eyes and cheeks were sunken, her eyes were bloodshot, her lips were extremely dry, and she squinted at the small amount of sunlight peaking over the clouds. She looked like she had the flu. I stood there just staring at her in horror. I wasn't sure what to say.

"Oh," she grumbled, letting out an irritated sigh. "I thought you were someone else."

"Forgive me, I think I may have come at a bad time," I apologized.

"What do you want?" she asked. Her tone was angry.

"My name is Bella Cullen and I'm the school nurse. I'm here about your daughter, Pippa," I explained.

"If this is about the bruises on Pippa it's because she's clumsy and falls a lot," she quickly excused as if she knew exactly why I was there. This was yet another common tactic for abuse.

"Yes, I understand about clumsiness. I was also _clumsy_ as a child and had bruises all over my body," I admitted. "That was until I had an amazing person come into my life and save me from the years of abuse I'd endured."

She glared at me and tightened her jaw. She didn't like the challenge. "Whatever it is you think is going on or whatever Pippa told you it's not true, Lady. I'd appreciate if you didn't make false accusations, otherwise I'll have to report you and make sure you're fired for overstepping your bounds."

"I apologize again," I said, putting my hands up in defeat. "I'm not trying to make accusations against anyone. I'm actually here as a mother to another mother. Pippa is friends with my daughter Renee. We would like to invite Pippa over for a sleepover this weekend and I thought I'd ask your permission and introduce myself to you first."

"No," she refused my request sternly. "Pippa is not allowed to spend the night at anyone's house. I'd appreciate it if you stayed away from my daughter and away from my home."

I nodded my head and smiled politely at her. "I'm sorry for bothering you. Have a nice day." I walked to my car, looking back once more before I got inside. The woman standing on the porch did not look happy at all. I suddenly wondered if my first assumption was wrong. Maybe Foxworth wasn't the one abusing. Maybe he was the one being abused and the anger building up inside of him was the reason for his outbursts of anger on the football field.

I rushed back to the school and asked for the rest of the day off. I texted Edward and told him to pick Renee up after school and let her hang out with him at the football practice. He texted back wondering why but I didn't respond. Instead, I went straight to the local child services department to make a report.

I talked to a woman named Sandra and gave her my story and what little proof I had. She took notes as I spoke but really didn't seem that interested in my story. When I was done, she placed her notepad down on her table and nodded her head. "Thank you for coming in and making a report," she said.

"What will happen now? Will you go out to the house to do an investigation?" I asked.

"Unfortunately, no," she answered. "We don't have the staff to investigate every claim that comes in. We'll keep it on our records and if anything else happens don't hesitate to come back and give us more information."

I was shocked. I just came in here and pretty much told them this little girl was being abused and they weren't planning to do a damn thing about it. "You're kidding, right? You have to do something."

"I'm sorry, Ma'am. I wish there was something we could do but unfortunately we have so many reports come in a day and it would be impossible to investigate every single one. You don't have any physical proof anything is happening other than an intuition. To be honest, isn't enough to do a formal investigation."

I was mad and I'm sure my expression and tone of voice was making the fact apparent. "I was an abused child myself. I know what abuse looks like. I can't believe you're going to sit here and do absolutely nothing while that little girl is being hurt. This is why I never told anyone what was happening to me because no one ever did anything. No one paid attention. I almost died at the hands of my step father and I would have if it wasn't for that one person who believed me. I will be that one person for that little girl." I was on the verge of tears when I walked out of the building. I sat in the parking lot unable to even move. I had to do something. I had to save this little girl.

I went straight to the high school and found Edward out on the football field with Renee standing next to him holding his clipboard. When she was younger she came out here to "help" her daddy all the time, but now she'd rather be a pre-teen girl. Football and her daddy weren't that important anymore.

"Hi, Mommy," she squealed when she saw me walking towards them.

"Hi, Sweetie," I greeted, giving her a quick hug before asking Edward to talk to me for a few minutes.

Edward followed me over to the bleachers where we sat down. "I haven't talked to him, yet. I have to do my job first. After practice I'll pull him aside and see what he has to say," Edward said, making excuses for why he hadn't talked to Foxworth.

"I went to see their mother today," I blurted.

"You did what?" he asked angrily.

"I had to know what was going on. I'm starting to wonder if it's Foxworth at all. I think it's their mom. You should have seen her. She was hideous and blatantly rude. She was quick to excuse Pippa's bruising before I even said a word about it. When I mentioned how I was an abused child she got very defensive and threatened reporting me. It's all the classic signs of abuse."

"What do you want to do then?" he asked. For the first he appeared as if he believed me and wanted to help.

"I went to child services and made a report," I continued. "I forgot how unhelpful they are. They don't plan to do anything other than document it."

"Alright, I'm going to call Foxworth into my office right after practice and I'd like for you to be there. You might have some insight in how to coax some answers out of him. But, if it doesn't turn up anything I want you to back off. I don't need you getting so involved you get hurt. To be honest, I don't even want you involved. I think this is going to bring up far too many memories and going to cause you to suffer. You already have nightmares and can't seem to face your past. This is going to a lot for you to handle."

"Edward, don't treat me like a child. I'm your wife and your partner. I can handle this if it means that little girl is safe."

He sighed and nodded his head in defeat. I knew he was only trying to protect me, but a strong courage overcame me when I knew I was saving someone from the same fate I had. I was a mother lion protecting her cub, even if it wasn't my cub.

Edward ended practice early and sent the team to the locker rooms. He asked Foxworth to come to his office after he showered and changed. I asked Renee to sit in the hallway and work on her homework while Edward and I talked to him.

When he walked in he didn't look nervous or concerned about being called into the coach's office, until he saw me there.

"What's going on, Coach?" he asked scanning the room with his eyes.

"Have a seat, Fox," Edward gestured towards the chair in front of us.

"Fox, this is my wife, Bella. She's the school nurse over at the middle school. Our daughter, Renee, is also friends with your little sister, Pippa." He sunk into his chair and dropped his head in defeat. "You know I've been a little concerned about your attitude and I'm starting to question why it is you can't seem to control your temper. Do you have any ideas why you can't?"

"No," he answered harshly, unwilling to look up at either of us.

"What if I told you I wasn't going to allow you to play if you can't figure out a way to control yourself?" Edward asked.

"You can't do that," he shouted, sitting up and challenging Edward with his wide eyes.

"I most certainly can. I've benched players for far less before. I want to get to the bottom of this so you have a successful football season, but I can't have you on my field if you're going to be getting in fights with the opposing team," Edward explained.

"Fine, bench me for all I care. I don't give a fuck what you do," he shouted slumping back into his chair.

Edward sat up, leaning his elbows against his desk and looking at Foxworth seriously. "I'm going to ask you this one time and I want you to be completely honest with me. You aren't in trouble and you aren't in any danger, but we need to know the truth. Is your little sister being hurt at home?"

"What?" he asked, chuckling at the question. "What makes you think she's being hurt?"

"I was an abused child and know exactly what it looks like. Just answer the question," I ordered from behind Edward.

"No, everything is fine. I can handle it."

The last little bit of his answer was the clincher. He was the oldest. He felt responsible and like it was his job to handle the abuse.

"Are we done here? I need to go home." I could tell Foxworth was upset and probably going to go home and hide any evidence of abuse on Pippa he could find. I couldn't let him leave.

"Not quite," I answered, motioning for him to stay seated. "Foxworth, I went to your house today. I met your mother briefly and..."

"You what?" he shouted, breathing heavily like he was in a panic. "How could you? I have to go." He jumped from his seat and ran out of the office, not even stopping to say goodbye to a few of the guys who were telling him goodbye.

Edward turned towards me with a knowing look on his face. He knew I was right now. It was just a matter of what do we do now.

During the night, Edward and I discussed our plan of operation. We were both going to make a report to the school and I was also going to bring this new information to the case worker I met. We weren't going to stop until we knew those kids were safe.

"There's just one thing I'm unsure of," I said with a far-off look in my eyes. Edward hummed in response and waited for me to explain what I was wondering. "Pippa said they have a little brother who's only about a year old. I know I wasn't at the house for very long but I didn't see or hear a baby. Foxworth never mentioned a little brother either.

"We'll get to the bottom of this, Bella," Edward assured, pulling me into his arms and flipping off the light. He gently kissed the back of my neck and whispered in my ear, "I'm sorry I didn't believe you. Forgive me?"

I nodded my head and nestled into him even further. I could never stay mad at him for long.

In the morning, I went to the principal of the school and made my report. It wasn't a surprise when the principal took down my accusations and pretty much just sat them aside. He said just about the same thing the case worker said. He'll keep it on file and watch for any other signs of abuse but other than that there wasn't much more they could do. The problem was these people didn't know what abuse looked like. They didn't know the power lies and cover-ups have. They didn't know how easy it was to convince someone they have no idea what they're talking about and to turn it around to be their fault. They didn't know abuse wasn't just bruises, but words, body language, behavior, and fear. Pippa and Foxworth had every single sign and I knew because I was once one of them.

Edward got much of the same response at the high school. Edward called Emmett and asked his opinion on what to do. Emmett told him to get more proof. We needed one of the kids to actually admit to the abuse or we needed to have physical proof of the abuse. It was beyond frustrating to be pushed aside by everyone who was supposed to be there for these kids and they weren't.

At lunch, Renee came to see me. I asked her why she wasn't having lunch with Pippa and she told me Pippa wasn't in school today. The knot in my stomach when she told me this was overwhelming. I almost felt like puking from the intense pressure I felt.

I quickly ushered Renee back to the lunchroom and told her I had some work I needed to get done. She questioned me and wanted to know what was going on. She knew something was wrong but I couldn't exactly tell her what it was. I put her off by telling her I thought Pippa might be sick and need some medicine. I don't know if she believed me but she accepted it and went back to lunch.

I immediately called Edward and told him Pippa wasn't in school. I was surprised when he said he already knew. He asked me to come to the high school as soon as possible so we could talk. I instantly thought the worst and wondered what had happened.

I rushed to the high school and met Edward in his office. Foxworth sat in a chair across from him with tears in his eyes, which he tried to hide as best he could.

"What's going on?" I asked.

"Foxworth asked for you to be here. He wants to talk to you," Edward explained. Edward motioned for me to take his chair, while he stood next to me.

"You said yesterday you were an abused child and you know what it looks like?" he reminded in a questioning way causing me to answer him with a yes even though he probably wasn't asking an actual question. "What are the signs?"

"Refusal to answer questions, bruises, making up excuses, trying to turn things around on others, anxiety and panic attacks, fear, anger outbursts or extreme shyness, refusal to stand up for yourself and letting your peers be mean to you, a need to be perfect and make everything neat, and an unhealthy need to get approval from adults, those are just a few but many of which I saw in you and in Pippa."

He nodded his head, focusing his eyes on a fly, which landed on a stack of papers on Edward's desk.

"Where is Pippa today?" I asked as calmly as I possibly could.

"She's at home. She has a big bruise across her face. I wasn't there to protect her," he cried.

I instantly got up and went around the desk to comfort him. I put my arms around him and shushed him gently.

"I wasn't there for her when I should have been. I thought I could handle it. I only have a couple more years left then I'm going to leave and take Pippa and Spencer with me. I'm planning to get a big football scholarship so I can move my brother and sister away from our mother," he said, still holding onto me like he was too afraid to let go.

"Where is Spencer? Is he left with your mother during the day?" I asked.

"No, I drop him off with a babysitter every morning and Pippa picks him up on the way home. Pippa takes care of him while I'm at practice or at a game," he explained. "Normally my mom stays in her room. She very rarely comes out. As long as she has what she wants then she normally leaves us alone. If she doesn't have what she wants then she gets mad. I take most of it. She hits me until I agree to get her what she wants."

I placed my hand over my mouth and gasped. "What is it she wants?" I asked once my initial shock subsided. I felt so bad for this boy. I knew exactly what he was going through and how helpless he felt and the responsibility he had to his brother and sister. I regretted even suspecting him in the first place.

"Mostly drugs," he answered. "She drinks a lot but it's harder for me to get her alcohol than it is to get drugs. I don't have to show ID to get drugs. I just need to know who to go to."

"Has she always been like this?" Edward questioned.

"No, it wasn't until my dad died a couple years ago. She was pregnant with Spencer. We were happy. My dad had money and a great job. We went to private prestigious schools. My parents were part of a high society. Then just a couple months before she had Spencer my dad died. We were all devastated. It was like our whole world came crashing down. We moved here and tried to start over but my mom went crazy. She didn't want to look at Spencer. She didn't want to take care of him. She was almost mean to him until I stepped in and started taking care of him myself. Then she started drinking nonstop and when that wasn't enough she started doing drugs. We had money from the life insurance and what my dad had put aside but over the last year she's spent almost all of it on drugs. I was actually planning to get a part time job just to pay the bills since all of our other money goes to her drugs."

Edward sighed heavily and looked up at me with angry and desperate eyes. "What happened last night?"

"Since you showed up at our house asking questions about Pippa she thought Pippa said something to you and was upset. When I got home last night, Pippa was lying on the floor rolled up in a ball and Spencer was sitting next to her crying hysterically. My mom had already gone back to her room when I got there so I cleaned Pippa up and calmed the baby down and got everyone to bed. This morning since Pippa had a big bruise across her face I told her to stay home and stay in her room with the door locked. I left her a sack lunch and told her not to come out no matter what. She'll be fine as long as she keeps the door locked and doesn't come out. My mom probably doesn't even know she's there."

Edward nodded his head taking in everything Foxworth had told us. I was surprised he was willing to tell us so much after all he's been through. I got the impression from his body language and the way he spoke that he was at his breaking point. He couldn't take it anymore and needed out. His angry outbursts on the field were his attempt at letting some of that anger and frustration he'd been carrying out. But now it's getting to be too much. I remember that feeling of the walls closing in around you and not being able to find a way out. Admitting all of this to us was his way out.

"I'm calling Emmett."

"What? Who's Emmett?" Foxworth asked visibly frightened.

"Emmett's my brother and he's also a cop. We're going to get this taken care of," Edward explained.

"No!" Foxworth shouted. "What's going to happen to my mom? What's going to happen to us?"

"It's alright, Foxworth. I know what you're going through but it'll all work out. Everything will be fine."

"My mom isn't a bad person. She just needs some help. She was a good mom before. Please don't call the police. Just tell me what I can do to help my mom," he pleaded making every excuse he could to protect his mom.

I pulled him aside while Edward made the call. "No one is saying your mom is a bad person. You're right, she does need help. We'll see to it that she gets the help she needs so you can have your mom back."

"But what's going to happen to us?" he wondered on the verge of tears.

"We'll figure that out but for right now we need to get your mom some help."

I hugged him giving him as much comfort as I possibly could. Sometimes all it takes is for one person to listen and care. It's why I love Edward and why I clung to him so much when I was young. He was the one and only person who would listen to me and cared about me.

"Emmett is making the call to have your mom picked up. A social worker will be on her way over to pick up your sister and we need to go get your baby brother," Edward directed. We went out to the car and drove to where Foxworth told us to go. He went in and picked up Spencer then we drove the short distance to his home. The police cars were already out front and they had Pippa leaning up against a squat car while a lady from the social services department did her best to comfort her. As soon as she saw Foxworth she went running towards him and hugged him tightly, crying even harder than she was before. Edward and I walked over to them and gave them some words of encouragement when a policeman carried their mom out in handcuffs. I held baby Spencer in my arms while the social worker talked to all of us about what would happen now.

When she asked if the kids had any family nearby or someone they could stay with, Edward and I glanced at each other just briefly, being able to read each other's thoughts, and agreed to let the kids stay with us until their mom could get the help she needed.

It was tough at first, learning to adjust to three extra kids running around the house. Renee was so thrilled to have her friend Pippa living with us. It was like they had a sleepover party every single night. Spencer was thriving and a happy little boy learning to walk and say his first words. Foxworth struggled a little with his mom being gone. He knew she was getting help but he missed her and occasionally would have anger outbursts. We got him and even Pippa into some counseling for their own wellbeing. Football was the biggest therapy Foxworth needed. Just like Edward had so many times before, he molded Foxworth into an amazing football player and made him use his anger in a positive way on the field.

After a while it became normal to have the three of them with us. They became part of our family. It broke my heart every time I thought about their mom coming back home. I knew it was what was best and what they needed more than anything, but I started to love the kids as if they were my own. I just hoped after all of this was over, they would still continue to want to see us.

After almost three months of being in treatment, Catherine was allowed supervised visitation with the kids. They were so happy to see her and glad she was getting help. They talked all the time about when she would be out of treatment and be able to come home. I was told she even apologized for hurting them and treating them so badly. It was nice to hear she was able to apologize to them. I never got that. I know if I had, and he truly meant it, I probably wouldn't be so scared of him still.

When Catherine was released from her treatment, I dreaded the day the caseworker came to tell us it was time for the kids to go home.

The day she did come I stood strong and invited her in politely. She sat down on the couch with a grave expression. She appeared to be dreading this just as much as I was. The kids were visiting Edward's parents for the day just because I didn't want them here when the caseworker came. I didn't think they needed to hear the news from her but from us so we were able to explain things to them a little better.

Edward walked in and sat down next to me, holding my hand to comfort me. He knew how attached I'd become and how hard it was going to be to say goodbye.

"I'm afraid I have some bad news," she began. Edward and I glanced at each other with confusion in our faces.

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm sorry to have to tell you this but Catherine O.D. last night and a neighbor found her body this morning," she said.

"That can't be possible," I expressed. "She just got out of treatment. She was doing really well."

"I know. It's a terrible situation but there's nothing any of us can do. Sometimes the minute someone gets out of treatment they go right back to the drugs. Apparently, that's exactly what she did. She tried to stay away for a while but the power the drugs have over her was too much and she went back."

I was already crying my eyes out. Edward did his best to hold me and comfort me. All I kept thinking about were the kids. How were they going to take the news? How would they go on without their mom? What would happen to them now?

"Since they no longer have a living parent I will be doing a search of any possible family members who would be willing to take them in. I hope you don't mind if they stay here a little longer than planned," the social worker wondered.

I was such a mess I couldn't even speak. Edward straightened next to me and cleared his throat. "We'll take them."

"Excuse me?" she asked.

"We'll adopt them. We always wanted a big family and they've already become part of our family in so many ways. We want to keep them," he explained further.

"Are you sure? This is a big commitment, you know?"

I looked up at Edward filled with hope and excitement. It never even crossed my mind to keep them until Edward suggested it. He looked down at me with a crooked smile on his face and rubbed my shoulder affectionately. "We're sure," he answered not even needing an answer from me. He just knew. He knew me better than anyone.

"Well, I will start the process but I should warn you it is a long process and will take some time. But the good thing is the kids won't be moved out of your home. I would like to tell the kids about their mother but if you don't mind I would like both of you present when I do. They're going to need some comfort after they hear the news."

"Of course," Edward agreed, answering for both of us. "We'll take care of the funeral arrangements for the sake of the kids as well. They will need a chance to say goodbye. I'll also call their counselor and let him know what has happened so he can maybe schedule a few more sessions in the next couple of weeks."

"That's sounds wonderful. Thank you both so much for being so supportive of these kids. They need people like both of you in their lives." She stood from the couch and shook both of our hands, informing us she would be back later in the day to talk to the kids.

After she left I looked towards Edward with a questioning expression. "What made you suddenly want to adopt the kids?" I asked.

"I told myself on the day I married you that I would never take anything for granted or ever question what I know in my heart is right. I made a lot of bad choices when I was a teenager. I made even more over the years. But when I know something is right I'm not going to question it. It may not have been exactly what we wanted or even the easiest way to come across it but those kids are part of this family. I feel horrible about their mom and truly wish things had been different, but I'm not going to question why things happened. I'm just going to accept what is and know the choices I make for this family are right. Those kids belong with us. They need us."

Edward held me in his arms for a long time while I cried. Cried from sadness for the kids, for joy for myself, for anger and hurt for their mother, for love for Edward and his loving ways, and for peace in my own pain. Having these kids in my life was a blessing in disguise. Not only were we getting the large family we always dreamed of, but because of helping them face their past and their demons, I was able to do the same for myself. I was finally able to face my fears and push through them knowing I had my family to support me and protect me. I would do the same for every single one of my kids and they would do the same for me. We would face our fears together.

**The End…for sure this time**

**Thanks for reading.**


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